She Couldn't help

Puffy knew that what Cl- Dream, what Dream did was wrong. She'd seen what all had been in the vault, seen how far he had been willing to go to regain control of the world. She knew what he had been doing to Tommy during his exile had been wrong: the way he'd manipulated him, destroyed his items, made it seem as if all his friends had simply forgotten about him and moved on.

Puffy had witnessed first hand the destruction that Her Duc- DREAM, that Dream had rained down on all of them. The flashes of TnT, hissing of withers and explosions still filled her nightmares some nights. She'd watched as horrified as the others, had fought with the others, cried with the others, bled with them. She'd stood in the rubble with them after, watching as Techno, Phil and Dream had made their escape (and even as he did, she'd felt him meet her gaze and the relief in it when he'd seen she was still standing.)

Puffy had seen the change in Dream that had been happening ever since L'Manberg was established. His smile had become less frequent, his eyes colder, his mask worn far, far more often than it ever had been before (even around her). She could feel him pulling away from everyone, the distance becoming more pronounced day after day, week after week, growing at the same rate as the ache in her chest. She wanted to reach out, to pull him back, but before too long he had started to get too far away.

Puffy knew all this.

It's why she'd agreed to join the others to stop him, why she'd travelled through the hellish Nether with Punz at the helm to reclaim what everyone had lost. She knew that she was doing the right thing as she'd help bring an end to Dream's reign of terror. She knew that he had to be stopped. Puffy knew all of this.

Yet as she'd walked through the Nether at the back of the group, she wasn't able to help the tremble in her hands as she clutched her axe to her chest. She couldn't help her hesitation as she stood before the portal that would lead them to where Tommy and Tubbo were in need of help. She couldn't help the film of tears in her eyes as she watched Her Du- as she watched Cla- as she watched DREAM get cornered by everyone.

She couldn't help the heartache she felt when Dream met her eyes, only her eyes, with a look of pain equal to her own. She couldn't help how she stood rooted to the spot even as everyone else rushed forward to defend the two they'd come to save. She couldn't help her hands gripping her axe so hard as Dream was forced to give up his gear that she feared she might crack the smooth oaken handle.

She couldn't help her whimpers as Tommy brought the Axe of Peace down on him again and again and again until Dream's mask was broken and his cloak covered in his blood. She couldn't help her body moving to get between Tommy and Dream to defend him from a killing blow, only being stopped when Nikki pulled her back with a firm hand on her shoulder. She couldn't help her relief when it was decided that Dream would be spared and simply placed in prison instead.

She couldn't help...the agony she felt when Dream, as he was being taken away by Sam, looked at her one more time, his own gaze filled with more pain than she'd ever seen before.

They'd won. Dream had been taken away to Pandora's Vault and his reign over the server would finally end. The others had rejoiced and all across the world a sense of newfound euphoria was felt. For the first time in what felt like years she got to see true happy expressions on the faces of Tommy and Tubbo. Even George, Sapnap and Bad looked relieved to have Dream gone.

Puffy felt smaller than she'd ever been before.

Somehow she managed to hold back the tears until she was safely back inside the safety of her own home. The hiccuping sobs came out in full force now as hot tears ran down her cheeks. Somehow Puffy managed to make it to her bed and collapse into it as the violent crying racked her body. How long she laid there she didn't know: a few minutes or many hours she couldn't be sure because it didn't change a damn thing. Dream was gone, locked away in a cold empty box, thinking no one in the world would be anything besides happy.

The light of a new day was streaming through her window when Puffy finally managed to pull herself up from her pillow. For a moment, a single glorious moment, Puffy thought that maybe what happened yesterday was just some terrible nightmare. Then Puffy saw the fireworks still going, the distant cheers from a celebration that had lasted through the night, and any hope she'd might've had collapsed in on itself. Tears once again started running down her cheeks and she curled in on herself as she cried.

The light was coming from the opposite direction when Puffy was finally able to drag herself from bed. She had no desire to go anywhere or see anyone else. No one but Her Duckling, no one but Clay. But Clay was gone now, and Dream was locked away in prison now. Fighting back new tears, Puffy was able to sit herself at the desk.

She did her best to ignore the many pictures around but couldn't help her eyes lingering on a few of her favorites: her and Clay sitting by a small pond fishing, Clay following her around one day as she smiled and proclaimed him Her Duckling, the two of them laughing over one of the many pranks they'd pulled, his eyes happy and his smile full of joy.

A fresh set of tears burned tracks down her cheeks again but this time she made no effort to stop them. Instead Puffy reached down and opened the drawer, pulling out her journal and flipping to a fresh page. Dipping her pen into some ink and writing even as tears stained the page.

I've lost my duckling. Maybe forever. Even through all the horrific actions he's done, I believe that one day he'll change one day. She paused, taking a moment to gather her thoughts and control her breathing some with her eyes swimming with tears shed and still unshed. I'm numb…

She couldn't help Her Duckling.

Hope you all enjoyed it! If you want, leave a comment or follow they're always appreciated. This came to my mind recently and I had to get it down. Stay tuned for more in future stories!