Thank you for going on this adventure with me!

Chapter 22

Katelyn spent the night at Jenny's house. She had intended to go to her place first, but realized someone would come looking for her there. She just couldn't face any of them, not yet anyway. The next morning, Katelyn made her way to her cottage. She found her mother there, waiting for her.

"Oh Katelyn, I'm so sorry."

Katelyn's eyes flooded with tears and she embraced her mother. They sat on the sofa and were silent for several minutes.

"I just wanted you to be happy," Carol said, holding onto Katelyn's hand.

"Why can't I be happy without a husband and a house and a baby?" Katelyn asked.

"I never said you couldn't-"

Katelyn took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "But you did, Mother. Every letter, every visit you'd ask if I'd found someone, every time you sounded so disappointed when I said no. You made it abundantly clear what you wanted for me, from me. And I just couldn't give it to you. Not in reality. I want to make you happy, and when I don't live up to what you want for me, I feel like I've failed you."

Her mother rose from the sofa and went to stand by the window. "You aren't suggesting that I'm meddling, are you?"

"Have you ever listened to yourself, Mother? Did you ever think how it sounded? 'Kate dear, are you seeing anyone? You know I'm not getting any younger. I want to hold my grandchildren before I die. You are all I have in this world.'"

"It's just that you sometimes need a little nudge. Dreams don't come true on their own accord."

"Whose dreams, Mother? Yours?"

"Well, I thought they were your dreams, too." A tear slipped down her cheek and she brushed it away.

Katelyn went to touch her mother's arm gently. "They are, Mother. But in their own timing."

"I suppose you are right. I'm sorry dear."

"I just want you to be happy for me just as I am, unfulfilled dreams and all. If none of the things you want for me ever come to pass, can you be happy for me?"

Carol took a couple of deep breaths. "I am happy for you and proud of you. I promise not to meddle in your life anymore."

"Thank you, Mother." Katelyn was exhausted but also relieved. They'd faced the truth about many things, and they'd survived. And despite the intensity of it all, her mother was fine.

Kate wished she could say the same for herself.

The next day Jarrod stopped by Katelyn's cottage. She had left a few things at his townhouse and he'd decided to bring them to her. It gave him a good excuse to drop by. He only hoped the extra day he had given her to cool off was enough for her to talk to him. Or at least listen.

He opened the gate when Lucky came running around the corner. "Hey girl." He petted the dog's head then looked up - just in time to make momentary eye contact with Katelyn before she disappeared around the corner of the house.

He followed her and found her leaning against a tree that stood in the middle of the backyard. Well, at least she hadn't run into the house and locked the door. The despondent expression on her face tore at his heart because he knew he was the cause of it. He held out a small valise.

"You forgot a few things."

She took the valise. "Thank you."

"Katelyn, I'm really sorry for what happened at the office."

"Stop. Don't. It's not necessary to say anything about it. It doesn't matter anymore."

But it does matter. He needed to explain.

The back door opened and Nick stepped out. "Here's your tea, just he way you like it-"

Nick stopped halfway across the yard and stared at Jarrod. Obviously he hadn't expected to see Jarrod here any more than Jarrod had expected to see him. And how did he know how Katelyn liked her tea?

Jarrod looked from Nick to Kate, his jaw clenched. "I see you've moved on rather quickly." He turned and walked back around the house before he did something they all would regret.

"Jarrod, wait!"

When he didn't even pause, Nick turned to Katelyn. "Aren't you going to go after him?"

"What's the point?"

"He came to talk to you. Don't just let him walk away like that."

"He could have stayed if he wanted to. I don't want to hear his excuses about Amanda Altman, anyway."

"He loves you, Katelyn."

She stared at him, then turned away. It wasn't true and she knew it. "He has a funny way of showing it."

"You've got him all wrong. You could have at least talked to him."

"I have nothing to say. He's the one who was wrong."

"Are you sure about that?"

Positive. She'd seen it with her own eyes and it still hurt. Jarrod had put in a token appearance here - how fortunate he'd actually had an audience in his brother - to show he was properly sorry for all that had happened. Now he probably was off to see that woman.

Nick was staring at her, and Kate lifted her chin to meet his look.

"You know, Jarrod could draw the same conclusions about you and me that you have about him and Amanda."

"Hardly." She hadn't been locked in a romantic embrace with Nick when Jarrod showed up.

"You don't think me walking out of your house like I belong here, with a cup of tea made just the way you like it, won't look the least bit suspicious?"

Why would it? Nothing was going on between them.

"Katelyn, I know you are in love with my brother."

She opened her mouth to deny it, but he didn't give her the chance. "And he loves you, though you both are too stubborn to admit it."

"I may have thought I loved him, but it was all an illusion. And any feelings I might have had are dead now."

"Right, which is why you're so hurt over what you think you saw; why your eyes are puffy and red from crying. Because you have no feelings whatsoever for Jarrod."

She wasn't going to listen to this. "Why don't you just go away?" She stalked off toward the back door.

"Because someone needs to talk some sense into you! Admit it. I must have hit a nerve for you to get so mad."

She went inside, slamming the door behind her, cutting off any further comments. She marched through her little house, holding up a curt hand to stall her mother's words before she could speak them and stormed into her bedroom.

She slammed that door shut as well. If only she could shut the door on her feelings as easily.

"Stay away from Kate." Jarrod's words strained from his throat.

"What?" Nick turned around from where he was standing on the balcony to stare at his brother.

Jarrod moved forward to grip the railing with both hands. The cold metal helped to cool his anger. "You heard me. She's off limits."

"Off limits? What are you talking about?"

"Katelyn. I love her like I've never loved any woman before. Just give me a chance to work things out with her."

Nick was staring at him as though he'd gone mad. "You think I'm trying to steal Katelyn away from you?"

"Maybe not steal, but in her vulnerable state she could easily be lured away spending time with you."

"You've got it wrong, Pappy." Nick walked over to Jarrod, his hazel eyes showing the hurt that he felt. "I'm trying to talk her into listening to you. I'm on your side. In spite of the low opinion you must have of me to think I would do something like that to you."

Nick stared at Jarrod for a moment more then turned and walked inside. Jarrod ran a hand over his aching eyes. It isn't enough that the woman I love thinks I used her, but I have to alienate Nick too.

With a heavy sigh, Jarrod bowed his head. After regaining some control, he went in to find Nick to make things right.

Katelyn made her way to Jarrod's office, each step taken with dread. She held a letter of resignation in her hands, knowing that quitting was the right thing for her to do. She thought a lot about what Nick had said to her and realized he was right. She did need to allow Jarrod to explain. Her heart was still bruised and hurting, but she would never forgive herself if she didn't at least try to listen to whatever explanation Jarrod had. But, her heart cried, what if Jarrod was prepared to tell her he and Amanda were back together, or that he still cared for her...? The hurt she'd felt that day when she saw him holding Amanda had been so deep.

She opened the door to the outer office and noticed it was empty. The door to the inner office was open and she tentatively walked across the threshold, pushing away the images of the last time she had been there. Jarrod's office was empty as well. The disappointment that she felt surprised her. As much as she was dreading having to face Jarrod, she was sad that he wasn't here. She looked down at the letter in her hands and decided to leave it for him on his desk. He had to be expecting it. He had to have known she couldn't continue to work for him. She took a deep breath and turned around. Standing in the doorway was Jarrod.

He walked in slowly and closed the door behind him. Katelyn waited for him to say something.

Jarrod's voice was low as he began to speak. "Amanda came to my office with the news that she knew we weren't really married."

So she was blackmailing you into getting back together with her? You could have told her no.

"I told her she was mistaken and to go back an check her facts. I told her what we'd shared was over, never to be resurrected. That I wasn't interested in her. Apparently she felt she could prove me wrong. She felt she could get a response from me by embracing me. I started to push her away-"

And well you should have!

"Then I realized that the only way to get it through to her that she didn't appeal to me any longer was to let her pull her stunt and see that it didn't work. I figured even Amanda wouldn't be inclined to pursue a man who reacted to her embrace with as much enthusiasm as a dead fish."

He smiled slightly. "So that's what I did. I didn't hold her. Didn't put my arms around her. In fact, I had my hands in my pockets, telling her I didn't have time for or interest in her games when you came in the door. After you left, I told her in no uncertain terms that if she ever bothered either of us again, I would have her brought up on harassment charges."

His gaze roamed her face, and when their eyes met, Kate only saw sincerity there.

"That's it, Kate. The gospel truth. I'd swear to it on a Bible if you wanted me to, but the bottom line is, you're just going to have to decide whether or not you believe me. And we're going to have to decide whether or not we can trust each other. I hope we can."

Entranced by his fierce gaze, she could neither breathe nor talk. She just stood there unmoving. Her heart thumped so hard against her ribs she thought it might break free.

"I'll warn you right now, I haven't given up on the two of us." His voice had a new earnestness, low and husky. He moved toward her. "Katelyn Mahoney, you are the woman I've waited for all my life. I know it as surely as I know my name. And I'm going to hound you until you realize it, too."

"You are?" His ardent pledge sent her stumbling back into his desk chair. If not for the quick reaction of his strong arms she would have fallen backward into the chair and probably tumbled to the floor.

A slow smile pulled at his mouth as she stood there, motionless, nestled against his chest - the place she was meant to be.

"I am. Because I can't fathom living life without you."

His words washed over her, and she felt the final remnants of her doubts slip away. This was true. This was solid and real and what mattered most - Jarrod's feelings for her; hers for him.

As for Amanda, she was the fantasy. The mirage that deceived her into seeing things that weren't true. Jarrod had told her the truth; Kate was certain of it, deep inside.

He caressed her cheek with the back of his fingers and leaned closer. "I love you, Katelyn Mahoney, now and forever."

She basked in the feel of his hand on her face and covered his hand with one of her own. "I lov-" but her declaration was lost in his tender kiss.

And at long last, Kate felt as though she'd come home.

Epilogue

The wedding was held in Stockton six weeks later. Nick and Heath stood with Jarrod, while Katelyn's friend Jenny and Audra were her attendants. Everyone who attended agreed that is was the most beautiful wedding they had ever seen.

After the reception, Jarrod and Kate were driven into town by Nick to the train station. Jarrod's private rail car was hooked up to the train that would take them back to San Francisco for their honeymoon.

Katelyn was busy looking out at the scenery as it passed quickly by. She felt Jarrod's arms come around her and he softly kissed her neck. Her eyes close with pleasure. She turned to face him and he placed a tender, yet passionate kiss on her lips.

Katelyn pulled back for a moment and said in a serious tone, "Promise me something, Jarrod."

At her somber request, he gazed down at her. "Name it."

"No more games. No pretense. No lies."

"I promise. Just a lot of years of love and honor and remembering how blessed we are."

He cupped her face in his hands and bowed his head, reverently sealing his vow with a kiss.

THE END