Chapter 3

Caroline tossed the phone on the bed and rubbed her temples wearily. She had taken the Cure the moment she stepped out of the boundaries of Mystic Falls nearly a decade ago now, and the face of a 27 year old woman now stared back at her out of the mirror. She couldn't just compel a pilot and jump on a plane out, as Lizzie had suggested an year ago, for that very reason. Vampirism was more trouble than it was worth, it wasn't really necessary to her mission to find a fix for the Merge (which she had been on, intermittently, for, yes, 10 years now) and being a 17 year old trapped in a grown woman's body had completely grossed her out, so she'd fixed it the moment she got a chance (with minimal interference from Alaric - that had been a pleasant surprise, and without her daughters knowing or catching on - after all, she really didn't look very different, although she felt much more comfortable now as an adult in the prime of her life and not a teenager trapped in a grown woman's body, with all of the horrifying emotional and psychological ramifications of that). Klaus had been lucky to be turned in his twenties, but then he'd always been lucky. Sometimes she wished she'd never become a vampire, but unfortunately that ship had sailed. Just like she wished sometimes she'd been able to have a choice when it came to having or not having children - she loved Lizzie and Josie so much she couldn't bear to be apart from them for even a day, and she admired and respected their mother (Jo hadn't chosen her psychopathic coven or her psychopathic brother, and they were responsible for the course of events that ended up with Jo's unborn twins being implanted in her womb) - but sometimes a different life, even one without her daughters, didn't seem so horrible. But those were hypothetical worlds - here in the real one, she was a mother, and she loved her daughters fiercely, and she'd do anything for them.

Caroline shook herself out of her thoughts and splashed water on her face, hoping to shock herself into action. She'd received some horribly disturbing news from Alaric, and now she had to call in a favor from a very old, very dear friend who owed her nothing, and who she owed, well, to put it mildly, a lot. Bonnie Bennett had saved Caroline's life more than once, and Caroline knew Bonnie didn't see it like that and would do anything for her friends - but this simply wasn't fair to her. It was one thing to call her and seek some help on something regarding the Merge, or something that could be done to help Alaric and the others remotely - Bonnie was, after all, always traveling, and a little break to check in with a friend was more than welcome for her - but this could require her to accompany Caroline back to Mystic Falls, and possibly for more than just a visit, which would mean Bonnie's only wish since Enzo died, to travel the world and enjoy herself, wouldn't be honoured. But they desperately needed someone to help out, and Bonnie was literally the only one who could. And, perhaps, Caroline and Elena would get a chance to reconnect with Bonnie - their friendship not being as close as it once was bothered Caroline, and she was sure it bothered Elena too.

She finally picked up the phone and placed the call, rubbing her temples - her headache was really bad - side-effect of remotely managing the school, she figured. She had to wait a while before it finally connected, although Bonnie picked up immediately after it did - she was probably in an area with low cell service.

"Caroline! Hi!" Hearing Bonnie's voice after so long eased some of the tension in Caroline's chest - as did the fact that Bonnie sounded happy. "It's been a while." Caroline could hear a wistful note in that beautiful voice. She leaned against the wall before responding.

"It has. You seem happy and, I don't know, fulfilled."

"Yeah, you would be too if you'd seen nearly every incredible thing the supernatural world has to offer." Bonnie lowered her voice slightly before the next part. "Sometimes, I wish you could've come with me. Both you and Elena. Just the three of us, enjoying a final adventure before - well, before we finally had to grow up and marry and have families and all that." She chuckled softly - the sound warmed Caroline's heart. She hadn't realized just how much she'd missed her friend.

"I wish we could've come with you, too." Caroline said, surprised to find that her voice sounded a little hoarse and tears were pricking at the corners of her eyes. She had to lean against the wall and steady herself again.

"Hey, are you okay?" Bonnie sounded concerned.

"Yeah. Yeah." Caroline said heavily, trying to brace herself for the next part of the conversation, which was likely to be uncomfortable. "But I didn't just call because I wanted to hear my best friend's voice again, although I definitely needed that." She chuckled softly.

Bonnie laughed softly at the other end of the line. "I know. You're managing a school from across a continent and looking for a fix to a decades-old magical problem that no one has ever been able to solve. You don't have the luxury of calling just because you wanna drop the tough facade and allow yourself to be vulnerable with a dear friend." Her tone was lightly teasing, and Caroline appreciated it - she needed some levity right now.

"I love you, Bonnie Bennett." Caroline responded softly.

"I love you too." Bonnie responded quietly. Caroline really wished she could hug Bonnie right now. But it was not to be. And Bonnie herself brought the conversation right back where it had to be. "So, what intractable supernatural problem do we have on our hands this time? Some sort of apocalypse?" Bonnie was joking around, but it wasn't really that far from the truth.

"Well, let's just say it's a problem that might require you to come back to Mystic Falls with me - for more than just a visit." Caroline said heavily.

"Caroline, when I said 'I love you', I meant ..." Bonnie sounded a little agitated.

"No, this is not about the stupid teenage crush I had on you all those years ago. I know you said you needed time - I'm not asking you to give me an answer right now, or ever - that hasn't changed. But we have a really bad situation on our hands that has nothing to do with whether you share my feelings from years ago that have somehow persisted to this day. The school is in danger from a very old and extremely powerful threat - worse than an Original. And things are getting out of hand. Emma left, Alaric is outmatched, and I don't have a clue what to do. I'm not asking because I'm still in love with you, Bonnie - I'm asking because I don't know what to do and I need your help. I need you, Bonnie. Please."

Bonnie sighed heavily on the other end of the line. That was enough to induce Caroline to profusely apologize.

"I'm sorry. I know you left Mystic Falls for a reason, and I know I'm not honouring your wishes. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Bonnie." Caroline sounded on the verge of tears.

"Where are you? I'll come to you." Bonnie responded quietly.

"Wait. You're coming?" Caroline couldn't believe her ears.

"It's my hometown, and they may not be my real nieces, but I love your daughters the way I'd love my own. I'm not letting anything happen to them or to Mystic Falls." Bonnie said fiercely.

Caroline sank to the floor in relief. "I'm in Italy. The Hotel Suisse, in Tuscany."

"That is a nice hotel." Bonnie said, and although she couldn't see her, Caroline could hear Bonnie raising her eyebrows in surprise. "I didn't know you could afford that."

"I can't." Caroline said amusedly. "We're just here for a few days, and I didn't want my daughter to have anything but the best accommodations. Before this, we were in a very reasonably priced place in Belgium."

"Wow." Bonnie responded, amazed. "Okay. Well, lucky for you, I'm close by. I'll be there in an hour or so."

"Okay." Caroline said heavily. "See you then."

Bonnie hung up then, and the phone slipped out of Caroline's hands due to her exhaustion. Caroline sat there on the floor for a few minutes, not caring what her daughter or anyone else would say if they found her like this. She'd been managing the school with no one but Alaric to share the burden, and she'd been searching for a fix to the Merge for a decade now - and she was about to pass out from sheer exhaustion. As she knew from the horrifying things that had been happening at the school while her daughter and the other students were attending (which she learned from Lizzie), and Alaric's report on Malivore and Hope Marshall Mikaelson (she still couldn't believe Klaus had a daughter, let alone that she attended their school), things had spiralled way out of control at the school - and yet she'd been focused on the Merge, which had developed a vice-like grip on her brain in such a way that she wouldn't rest easy until she found a fix - which meant she was constantly wracked with guilt, exhausted and depressed to boot. She needed to go back and try to salvage this situation any way she could. She sat there for a few moments with her head in her hands, wondering what the hell she was gonna do.

Bonnie arrived well within time, and Caroline went to answer the door of her room without regard to her clothes or her general demeanor - the long, flowing white dress she was wearing looked so worn and put-upon the old Caroline would have dumped it, and there were tear streaks on her face and she looked woebegone, but it was just Bonnie, after all - and she was in hell, so she supposed she could be forgiven for not looking her best.

Bonnie was standing outside with concern and worry chasing each other around her beautiful face. Caroline leaned against the door almost the moment she opened it, fearing she would collapse from exhaustion. Bonnie exclaimed in shock and concern and immediately caught Caroline around the waist. Despite her feeble protestations that she was fine, Bonnie, her arm firmly supporting Caroline around the back, led her to the bed and laid her gently down on it.

"How long has it been since you had a glass of water?" Bonnie asked. Without waiting for the answer, she went and filled a fresh glass from the jug on the bedside table and brought it to Caroline. Caroline sat up weakly and reached for the glass. Bonnie shook her head in bewilderment.

"You're about to pass out from exhaustion, Caroline. What happened?" Bonnie questioned, concerned but gentle. She brought the glass to Caroline's lips since Caroline had no energy left whatsoever.

Caroline took a sip from the glass and sighed heavily. She attempted to speak but Bonnie wordlessly brought the glass to her lips again. When it was finished, Bonnie placed the glass back on the bedside table next to the jug and turned back to Caroline.

"Ok, I'm no doctor but even I can tell that you're exhausted, you have lines around your eyes which means you're stressed out, your dress is streaked with dirt which would usually cause you to have a cardiac arrest but you don't seem to care - all of which leads me to the conclusion that managing this school with no one except Alaric to help out, and searching for a fix for this ... blessed Merge has you in a state which I'd say is close to complete and total mental and physical breakdown. You can barely stand, and you look like you're about to have a stroke. You need to stop and rest. Just go to sleep for a while. Please. You're scaring me. Please just go to sleep for an hour or so - I promise you, the sky won't fall down and the world won't come to an end if you take a breather for an hour or two." Bonnie looked scared out of her mind by her friend's state.

Caroline sighed heavily.

"Okay." She said quietly. "But you're gonna be here when I wake up, right?"

"Of course I will." Bonnie said quietly, caressing Caroline's arm. "Now go to sleep."

Caroline settled down on the bed, turned over on her side and closed her eyes.

Once Caroline was breathing evenly and seemed to be fast asleep, Bonnie opened the door of the room and stepped out, closing the door behind her. Outside, she saw Lizzie.

"Lizzie." She said, surprised. She knew the girl had been in the room next to Caroline's, but she hadn't expected to see her standing outside the door.

"I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to eavesdrop - I'm just ... worried about my mom. Is she gonna be okay?"

"She's just ... worked herself to the bone. It's just how she is. Right now, sleep will fix most of it. Long term, things really need to change at your school."

"Oh my God, yes. Dad - he has a beard now." Lizzie said, grimacing.

"Oh, dear God." Bonnie said, burying her face in her hands. "That ... That is never a good sign. I can't - I can't keep letting your parents overwork themselves like this. Things are going to change at the school, whether they like it or not - but don't tell them, please - they really think they can handle all this alone, and then it comes down on them like a ton of bricks and crushes them. Officially, I'm just supposed to help with some sort of spell, but unofficially, there are going to be some major changes - but you need to keep this a secret."

"Of course, Aunt Bonnie." Lizzie said firmly. "I need my mom and dad back, and I don't need the school and the Merge and everything else making it so that I feel like I don't have a mom and dad."

"I'm sorry." Bonnie said quietly. "You and your sister have been through a lot, and you deserve better than parents who can't be there for you because they're too busy running a school or trying to protect you from some far-off dangers. I wish I'd been there at the school."

"Is that really an option?" Lizzie asked. "I mean, I thought you'd left Mystic Falls for good."

"I thought so too, but now I feel like I might have to come back, for more than a visit, because things are spiralling way out of control. Just don't tell anyone about this, please."

"I won't." Lizzie said reassuringly.

Caroline woke up all of a sudden, and started casting about in confusion, wondering what had happened. Then she saw Bonnie, and calmed down a little.

"How long ..."

"A few hours." Caroline was shocked and tried to sit up, but Bonnie took hold of her shoulders gently and guided her back down onto the bed. "It's okay. Lizzie's fine, I'm here, and you're looking like yourself again." Bonnie smiled softly at her. "You didn't even miss lunch. Here."

Bonnie placed a table in front of Caroline with a typical Italian lunch, neatly divided into portions. Caroline was hungry - she hadn't eaten anything since the morning - but she still felt a little weak. Bonnie recognized that, and took over, bringing the spoon to her lips. The food was as she expected - light and pleasant, the subtle flavors playing on her taste buds. Part of the reason why she preferred real Italian food to the ridiculous knockoffs in America was that it was light and subtly flavored, unlike the heavy slop drowning in sauce and oil that American "Italian food" places served.

But the part she didn't enjoy was Bonnie having to feed her like a little kid.

"Ok, this is ridiculous." She declared after some time. "I'm not a little kid, and you shouldn't be having to feed me like one."

"You're still weak." Bonnie pointed out quietly. "And that is the dumbest argument I've ever heard. If your arm was broken, you'd be as helpless as a kid. Also, don't couples do this too?"

"So we're a couple now?" Caroline asked teasingly.

"Caroline, you said you wouldn't force me to give you an answer. And what about Stefan?"

"I've spent nearly a decade honouring Stefan's memory in everything I do." Caroline said quietly. "He has a memorial library dedicated to him with more consolidated supernatural knowledge than anywhere else in the world. That entire school was built to honour him. He wanted to raise Lizzie and Josie with me, even though they weren't his children - now they're both an year and a half away from adulthood, and from becoming two of the most wonderful women this world will ever see - I couldn't be more proud of them. I mourned him for two years - I literally mourned him - I didn't allow myself to do anything except grieve his death and work myself to the bone setting up that school so I could honour his memory and commemorate everything he was to me. I refused to love anyone else for years - even though I had feelings for you, I shoved them somewhere deep down, so deep that I couldn't feel them - because it would be disrespectful to him and his memory if I moved on too soon. But a decade after his death, it's not disrespectful to move on. He would want me to move on, and be happy - whoever it was with. And I'm not forcing you to give an answer - I'm not forcing you to do anything, Bonnie, because I love you, and when you love someone, you let them do whatever makes them happy, even if it means not admitting whether they feel the same way about you, or being with someone else. If you ever decide to tell me one way or another, I'm here - but it's your decision - when to tell me, and whether to tell me at all. All I know is, I'm done hiding my feelings for you out of respect to Stefan or because I was afraid of how you would respond, or whatever. I love you - I'm in love with you."

Bonnie was finding it hard to avoid the tears pricking at her eyes. I love her too, she screamed in her head. I love her so much my heart hurts not being with her. She's my best friend and I want her to be happy - don't I owe it to her to tell her, if I think she'd be happy with me? She wants to be with me too - what more is it gonna take before I admit it? I love her. I love Caroline Forbes, and I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I want to marry her, and walk her down the aisle, and wear those stupid rings, and kiss her in front of everyone without anything to fear. She's been mourning Stefan - well, I've been mourning Enzo too, and for just as long. Why can't I move on? Enzo wanted nothing more than for me to be happy - if she makes me happy, why shouldn't I be with her?

"I'm sorry." Caroline said all of a sudden. "I know it might feel like I'm trying to get you to admit what you feel without actually saying it, but honestly, that isn't what I'm trying to do - I'm sorry - I - "

"Caroline, it's okay." Bonnie said, smiling sweetly at her and stroking her cheek. "I understand. I understand, because I feel the same way. I always have. I love you too. I love you so much. I was worried about Enzo, and worrying that something was wrong - but I guess I was just afraid of ruining our friendship - but I realized I was being silly. I want to be with you - I want to marry you, and spend the rest of my life with you."

Caroline was so happy she could hear her heart singing with joy. She'd loved Bonnie for so long, she honestly didn't know what it would feel like if Bonnie felt the same way - except it was better than she could've ever imagined. All she could do was hug Bonnie tightly in response. The two women hugged each other, their love for each other overflowing from their beautiful features. Someday, they might begin an actual relationship but right now, they were content to know they both loved each other as much as it was possible for two people who had been in love with each other for so many years.