Two chapters in one night. I was in the mood for getting this out there.
I should add I am not writing this as I go. It's all written, the whole fic. I ain't no superman, writing at superhuman speed... If only.
There are some obligatory Invader Zim references too.
Nny had a new friend. An actual friend who didn't come from inside his head for once.
It didn't seem real yet. He had a living, corporeal person as a friend, and bleeding ass cracks! This wasn't good. Molly, the cute little girl next door, was making him feel again.
Fuck feelings. They only bring you pain, convincing you that you can actually be happy. Just cold, empty nothingness. That was the way to be. The perfect, ultimate being...
Oh, to be as unfeeling as Mr. Samsa—a bug who still haunted Nny to this very day with his coldness.
Yet coldness aside, Nny couldn't have picked a more adorable friend. The sound of her cherubic laugh made his chest feel all fuzzy, and he wondered if he could rip his heart out without killing himself.
No, he needed his aortic pump to keep beating. Ending his life now would only put a damper on his search for answers, and that just wouldn't do.
Nny still wanted to know what it all meant. What is the universe? Why are we all here? And what does happen to the light when the refrigerator door shuts?
So many questions, but little means of having them answered. Well, for now...
With his feelings out of the way, Nny could search without distraction. But it appeared that his emotions had returned with a vengeance, along with his newly acquired emotion of empathy.
Molly was a distraction, but he couldn't go back on his word now. He pinkie swore to it.
It was a binding contract, one as old as time itself. Now Nny had to be Molly's friend forever. Going back on his word would only cause the world to crumble.
For all Nny knew, their pinkie swear could be the only thing holding the delicate stitches of the universe together, and he would not put a tear in that fabric.
He liked the universe; it was his home. He may or may not have been the cause of its undoing once when he flushed all of humanity's excess shit into oblivion, and he did not want to be the reason the universe collapsed again.
At least then the universe was restored. There would be no backup disc this time. No rewind button. All gone. No more.
Nope. No going back. Now Nny had no choice but to follow through with his promise.
It could be worse. He could have been stuck with a party clown or worse... a cheerleader.
If he had to be friends for all eternity with someone, then... he was glad it was her. She was the least most aggravating person he had ever met. Quite frankly, she was charming and pleasant to be around, and Nny wasn't.
Nny's total opposite indeed. If anyone should be crying, then it should be her. No kid wants a Homicidal Maniac for a best friend, do they? Nny had no idea what kids liked these days, but being friends with a murderer probably wasn't very cool...
Poor Molly; he had tainted her pure mind. He would rot her brains for sure. He did it with Squee. At the time, he thought he was helping the wee lad, but it turned out he had messed him up. Nny saw the boy at the hospital when he was there for his sleep study, and Nny had no doubt in his mind that he'd been the cause of the boy's insanity (just as Schmee warned him once).
He could not do the same to Molly, but he would not reject her friendship either. The universe depended on their being eternal friends, after all.
As different as they were, Nny also saw a little of himself in her. God knows why; she was bright whereas Nny was dark, but she was lonely, just like him.
Plus, she was an artist, too, and it was always nice to meet a fellow creative. They understood your need to be 'In the zone' with little distractions. Though, of course, Nny's version of being "In the zone" lately came in the form of Happy Noodle Boy. Shiver...
Someone had posted a dead rat in his mailbox the other day with the words carved into its flesh, "Gib us the Noodle! We needz the Noodle!"
Scary shit indeed. Nny was afraid to leave his house.
But when he got down to it, he would never obliterate his feelings for Molly. Not that it had helped him before; he still thought about a certain someone from time to time.
He saw her illustrations for a book she'd worked on once, and it was great to see that she'd moved on. She probably wasn't even thinking about him anymore; she probably had some new skinny boyfriend now who she could talk to about books, art, movies, and fudge...
This was why he preferred to be cold. Making new friends had only brought back old feelings for another.
This time was different, though; Nny could feel it. With Devi, it had been romantic, and romantic love often comes hand in hand with lust and fuck lust. It was the worst sin of all. Nny would take gluttony, pride, envy, greed, and sloth any day over lust...
Nny still got aroused from time to time (since it was a universal problem amongst the populace). However, Nny often took delight in the killing of men who flaunted their dicks, like that one who left that girl for dead behind the Dumpster. So tragic, but Nny had found her killer in no time.
A typical 'alpha' male with too much testosterone fuelling his veins. Too bad he met his demise in the form of a puny omega in the end, like Nny...
With Molly, their bond was pure and platonic and perfect in its simplicity. There were no other conflicting feelings getting in the way. It was just friendship and nothing more, nothing less.
Although he seemed to be absorbing her sadness lately like some sea sponge, he'd rather the nasty emotions chewed at his organs instead. That delicate heart of hers would not be able to handle such pain, but that was fine. She was stronger in other ways.
The world needs more tender people like Molly. Nny should know; he was not one of them and was pretty much as bad as the people he murdered.
He jumped next when someone posted a flyer beneath his front door. Growling to himself, he stomped over and yanked it open, retrieving his twin blades from his pockets. "The sign says no flyers! I don't want your "free pizza" or your free organ transplants! You only lie!"
There was no one standing behind the door. Well, no one tall, anyhow.
"Um... NNY?"
At the sound of that small voice, he peered down, meeting those wide, blue eyes of Molly's. She was crouched down, having just finished slipping her flyer beneath the door.
A smile stretched across Nny's face when he spied his little friend, and now he stowed his knives away and welcomed her with open arms. "Molly! What a coincidence. I was just thinking about you."
The fear slowly ebbed from her face, and now she matched his smile, though hers was less creepy. "You were?"
"Yes, since we're eternal friends now and all. You know, I've been thinking more about that pinkie promise we made, and I believe our vow may be the only thing holding the entire universe together. So it's imperative that we become more acquainted. Come inside before the stale air gets out."
"But..."
He dragged her into the house then shut the door, and Molly gazed around, a startled expression on her face.
Ah, pooh. If he knew he was going to have a friend over, he would have cleaned up a little. There was a discarded Taco Smell wrapper on the floor (Nny had a taco earlier, and for once no one called him wacky—a new world record).
Molly's eyes took in the décor, namely the large painting of some otherworld creature Nny had painted back when he could create something other than stick figures. She seemed engrossed by it and not at all scared like most kids her age should be, and it was happening...
She was become desensitized. Not good. He could not let her become insane, like him. So he moved across and turned the picture around, and an image of a smiling unicorn took its place.
In hindsight, the unicorn was probably scarier. But its fart was a magical rainbow cloud, so all good.
"There, much better. Don't want you ending up in the Crazy House for Girls now. Do they still make crazy house cards at skool these days?"
Molly thought a moment. "I... think so..."
Nny waved his hand. "Never mind. Please, take a seat, Molly."
He gestured to his sofa. The child climbed up onto the cushion, and her legs dangled over the side. Her feet didn't even touch the ground and so cute. She really was short; she made Nny feel like a giant.
Nny grabbed a box of nails so he could face the child, but then he leaned down and changed the word 'nails' to 'feathers' with a marker pen, then took his seat. He leaned his face on his hand, prompting the girl to speak. "So, go on, ask me a question. The fate of the universe depends on it after all."
Molly blinked, confused by his words. Then she shrugged and handed him the flyer again. "Okay, but I have to be home soon. My Mommy doesn't like me being outside for too long because of that girl on the news."
Nny's face brightened up as he took the flyer. "Oh, you mean the one behind the Dumpster? You have nothing to worry about. I took care of him..."
Again, the child blinked. "You... did?"
Nny ignored her question, glancing down at her flyer. His eyes bugged. "What's this?"
Molly matched his smile. "A birthday party invitation! It's not a real one. Since I only just moved here and don't have any friends yet, Mommy said it was best to have a party next year instead, but that doesn't mean you and me can't celebrate. I will be six! A big girl!"
Now it was Nny's turn to blink as he peered down at her large, childish writing—written in pink crayon, too. "Dear NNY. You have been cordially invited to a tea party at your best friend Molly's room at 7 pm. Wear a nice hat."
There was a picture of a little girl with yellow hair and a bright smile on her face, wearing a wide-brimmed hat. Nny was impressed.
"Self-portrait?" He held up the drawing and Molly giggled.
"Yeah, that's me!"
Nny studied the drawing some more. It was actually good. Not that Nny would say so, anyway, if her drawing wasn't so remarkable, but she wasn't lying when she said she could draw.
She certainly drew better than Nny at the moment. Her self-portrait shits all over Happy Noodle Boy any day.
"It's really good. Seems you truly are quite the artist."
She beamed. "Thank you! One day, I will illustrate my own books like Beatrix Potter!"
"Who's that?"
"The author of Peter Rabbit."
"Rabbit? No, no rabbits. Too many painful memories..."
Molly looked taken aback a moment. Then she righted herself and smiled yet again. "Okay, I won't draw any rabbits, NNY."
He peered back down at her invitation, that warm, fuzzy sensation taking a hold of him yet again. No one had ever invited him to a party before.
"So, will you come? You don't have to wear a hat."
Nny gazed into her hopeful blue eyes and sighed. "Okay. So long as that snob Mrs. Hooftington won't be there."
"She won't, and neither will Lucia. It will just be you, me, and Mr. Snuffles!"
"Good, because I liked him..."
Silence trickled between them again. Molly kicked her legs over the edge of the sofa, glancing around the room. Her eyes fell on the drawing table with the lamp and smiled. "Is that where you draw? Can I see?"
Nny's eyes popped from his sockets. How could he show her that asinine piece of shit of a stick figure after the amazing work of art she'd just handed him?
"Um... maybe another time..." he said, changing the subject quickly. "So, six, huh? Neat. Do you feel old yet? You're aging as we speak, Molly. Don't you feel it?"
He wrung his fists, squeezing them in front of her face, but she only laughed.
"No, silly. Six isn't old. I'm still only a little girl."
"Yeah, right now you are, but you won't always be. I hate to break it to you, Molly, but if we're going to be eternal friends, then you will one day be even older than me. I don't age. I'm frozen in time. My cells don't change. So, I'm sorry... When you're covered in wrinkles, I will still be young. Not in a vampire kind of way, I hate the drinking of blood, but in an "Existing in many realities" kind of way. I do not belong to one reality but many. And as a result, I do not age."
Once again, the child only looked bewildered, but she just went along with his musings now. "Okay... if you say so..."
More silence. Molly cocked her head to one side and asked him a question now. "How old are you, Nny?"
"In this reality? Probably a million or something, but in appearance... twenty-six. It's all so confusing..."
He rubbed the back of his shaved head.
Molly smiled pleasantly, kicking her legs some more. "Well, you ask me another question. What d'ya wanna know?!"
Nny watched her attentively. Then he pointed at her hair. "Is that natural blonde?"
She flicked one of her blonde pigtails aside, smugly. "Sure is. My Daddy's family is Swedish."
"Ooh, neat. My family is Mexican. At least... I think they are... were..."
Nny had to stop a moment as he tried to remember where he put his family last. He had to come from somewhere. People don't just pop into existence... or do they?
Molly's eyes enlarged. "Mexico?! Do you speak Spanish? Hola, NNY, soy Molly, tu nueva mejor amiga para siempre."
"No. I don't know. I don't remember much of my origins, Molly. I... don't even know where I came from, where I started... Mexico, Sweden, Planet Irk, it's all irrelevant to me. I do speak with an American accent, but maybe they just programmed me to sound that way so I could blend in with the native fauna. I get so confused, it makes my head hurt..."
Molly watched him with shining eyes, and he'd only gone and made the child pity him now. "You... don't remember anything? No even your Mommy and Daddy?"
He shook his head. Whenever he tried to recall his Mother and Father, his mind drew blanks. His past was an empty canvas, and he just could not for the life of him remember one aspect of his life prior to moving in at his current residence.
From the moment he woke up and returned from hell, he assumed he would remember, yet he didn't. Sometimes Reverend Meat helped him remember things, but again, nothing. Hence why Nny was convinced he had no past. He had come up with a theory: Aliens had brought him to the planet Earth on some reconnaissance mission, which would make him an Extra-terrestrial. An invader from the stars, so to speak.
There was that strange green kid he saw yelling at his green dog the other day at the park, so he knew he wasn't the only alien invader. That was when a kid with a large head popped out of the bushes and chased him down the street, and Nny had laughed for a good five minutes.
At least Nny's disguise was better than that green kid's.
Nny would spare Molly the gory details though and just say he couldn't remember.
"No. I don't remember a thing, Molly."
"Oh. How sad..."
More awful, awful silence. Nny almost missed the voices in his head. Where were they, lately? Even Reverend Meat had nothing to say these days.
Shit. Was he losing his insanity? Oh, dear god, no. He was becoming... normal.
Molly jumped down from the sofa and approached Nny on his box of feathers. She wrapped her tiny arms around him and hugged him tightly, and Nny almost fell off his box.
"It's okay, NNY. I'm sure you will remember them again one day. But even if you don't... then I can be your family..."
"Uh..." Nny said, a little distracted. It felt like she was choking him. Those teeny arms of hers were stronger than they looked.
She let go and skipped towards the door. "Well, see you at seven, NNY. There will be cake!"
Molly vanished at last and despite himself, Nny smiled.
Well, he did like cake...
This is what Molly said in Spanish: "Hello, NNY, I am Molly, your new best friend forever."
Nothing special. I got it from Google Translate, but I thought it was cute that she could speak Spanish. Smart, multilingual kid. I can't speak Spanish; I can barely speak English...
Nny is canonically Mexican, in case you weren't aware. It's never downright stated, but Jhonen did mention that the one thing he and Nny had in common was that they weren't pale, in the Directors' Cut. Also, if you follow Johnny C. on Twitter (which I think is Jhonen), he mentions in Tweets offhandedly that he is Mexican. There's one where he states he will be celebrating Dia de los Muertos by creating more ghosts...
Shit. I'm crying now thinking about Coco. How the feck I go from JtHM to Pixar, I'll never know 😂
Thank you for reading again. I'm no review junkie or anything, but if you are reading this... saga, please feel free to drop in your thoughts. I will thank you personally and send some luck your way. I'm 12% Irish, so try it 😁