MDS/N 1: I again passed Richard76310's challenge to another writer. I was pleasantly surprised when fezzywhig answered the call. After I read his contribution, however, I was struck with jealousy and almost deleted every other word so as to make it incoherent. All that did was reduce it to twenty times better than anything I've ever written. Suffice to say, I have left his story intact that you may read it unaltered and unfiltered. Don't blame me if you go blind with laughter, just like drinking moonshine straight from the still. So, don't say I didn't warn you!

MDS/N 2: Have you read fezzwhig's wonderful Chuck versus The Blocker? Judging by the number of reviews, I would say no, you haven't. Well, shame on you! I don't know how you continue to sleep at night. I hazard that you probably toss and turn and can't seem to get conformable. Well, if you read this wonderful story, that might not be a problem. So, after you read his entry into the pantheon of WHTT, go read it and you'll sleep like a baby, I promise.

None of us own anything but our own whits and sometimes not even them. Needless to say, we are all borrowing Mr. Fedak's toys and returning them only a little tarnished.

What Happened This Time?

Chapter 12: Just Another Mission

Guest Written By:

fezzywhig

A/N Thanks to Markey for asking me to to contribute! I don't write suggestive humor typically but I hope I passed the audition.

"I've heard people say that

Too much of anything is not good for you, baby

Oh no

But I don't know about that…"

The dulcet tone of Barry White's basso voice filled the room only slightly masking the more...primal sounds present. Diane Beckman found herself in one of her favourite places. A partially consumed Old Fashioned on one side of her, an empty stemmed martini glass on the other side and Roan beneath her. Just as the rhythm started to increase, the sound of a phone broke said rhythm and a grimace fell across Diane Beckman's face...she knew the ring tone and was glad a video meeting hadn't been initiated.

"What happened this time Colonel?"

"Nothing Ma'am, Simply reporting back on a successful mission"

"Really?..."

"Yes Ma'am. No kinky se...I mean "wine tasting". No public sex…"

"Oh how I miss the days of Chuck not being a fan of PDA."

"Roger that Ma'am...Roger that. But as I was saying there were no problems. Agents Carmichael and Walker procured the documents and had them delivered to me here at my apartment...although the envelope is a bit sticky."

"Uh huh…"

Diane Beckman was having none of this. This didn't sound at all like Chuck and Sarah of late. She hadn't made her rank by just accepting things at face value.

"Colonel, where did the intel for the mission originate?"

"An asset inside the Chinese embassy, Christine Fang passed information onto a Congressman. This asset was being handled by Mei Lyn's brother so Chuck and Sarah were tasked with making contact. Walker suggested that she and Chuck attend a Chinese Embassy event using their Carmichael aliases."

"I see...Fang, Fang did you say?"

"Yes Ma'am. Walker said there was going to be some entertainment that would be a distraction. It was cultural, called Bukkake theater…"

"Bukkake? Not Kabuki Theater?"

"Pretty sure she said Bukkake which was strange since I think that's a Japanese word and this was at the Chinese embassy."

And there it was. She hadn't earned those stripes for nothing.

"Casey, I believe we have some surveillance at the embassy. See if you can pull up the video from tonight."

She knew this was mean but dammit he'd interrupted Roan time.

"Yes Ma'am. I'm pulling it up now...We'll that's weird. Everyone is dressed in robes. It sort of reminds me of that scene from "Eyes Wide Shut"...Oh shit No! My eyes! My eyes! Their disrobing...Walker is on her knees with Bartowski above her. My God No No No! Really? My God I knew she was flexible but...how...how does she bend that way? WHAT! Damn that stuff is all over the place... Ma'am Request for a Hazmat pickup and some horse tranquilizers. This has got to stop!

"At Ease Casey!" Beckman was holding back the laughter now. "Get the Johnny Walker Black out. I'll send a courier for the intel. I'm authorizing a leave of Absence for you. You've earned it."

And with that she disconnected the call. She herself had become a scotch fan recently to handle these debriefs but seeing that Roan was still as ready as ever she would find another way to cope. In her current mood she thought maybe she could get a copy of that video too.

MDS/N 3: Please leave a review as I will be sharing them with the Guest Authors. Thank you for your time and attention.