MDS/N 1: On a whim I reached out to one of my favorite authors from back in the day. BillAtWork, now I know he hasn't posted anything for a bit but I just had to ask him about Richard76310's challenge. We had been discussing a couple of his stories, when all of a sudden I got a first draft of the story you hold in your hot little hands. I squealed like a little school girl, did a happy dance, which caused my family to look at me very strangely. This is another comical story that should contain a warning about the side effects but by now, I'd hope you guys all know them and can prepare accordingly.
MDS/N 2: A Recommendation From Charming: Hey everyone, Charming here with a recommendation for a story to read. If you like stories with a bit more angst and drama than fluff, than BillAtWork is the guy for you! His story "The Fake Relationship ReMastered" and its sequel "The Cost of Love ReMastered" are two brilliant stories, and two of the most influential stories for me when I first started writing. Drama, romance, Charah, Bill's got it all in spades in his stories so make sure you go check out his other works! Until Next Time :D
None of us own anything but our own whits and sometimes not even them. Needless to say, we are all borrowing Mr. Fedak's toys and returning them only a little tarnished.
What Happened This Time?
Chapter 13: What's Good for the Goose
Guest Written By:
BillAtWork
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Diane Beckman tried to focus enough to look at the clock. One would think that she would be used to be awakened at 3:00 in the morning. After all, with her out of control team on the West Coast, it was only midnight there. She clicked on her laptop, partially to get that damned ringing to stop, but mostly with dread. What kind of fresh hell was Colonel Casey going to brief her on this time?
Except it wasn't the Colonel. "Agent Walker," Beckman said. "Is something wrong?" Once her eyes were focused and she could take a second look, something was obviously wrong. What few clothes Walker was wearing were definitely disheveled. The plain white shirt she was almost wearing plainly said that she had somehow misplaced her bra. Her hair was a tangled mess and there was a clear mouse forming under her left eye.
Sarah finally looked up when she hear the voice. "Hi," was all she said.
Beckman did a double take. "Agent Walker," she said. "Are you drunk?"
Well that got Sarah giggling. "Yup," she said. "Smashed. Blotto. Trashed. It's all Gertrude's fault. That girl can really drink."
"Agent Walker," Beckman said. "Where are Agents Bartowski and Casey?"
Sarah paused for a long moment. "Oh yeah," she finally remembered. "They're in jail. You probably need to bail them out."
General Beckman wiped her eyes. At least now she was fully awake. "Why are they in jail?" she asked. "What happened?"
Sarah was still giggling. "It was a barroom brawl right out of the movies," she said. "It was so messed up. I had the best time."
Beckman willed the calm into her voice. "Agent Walker," she said. "Take a breath and tell me what happened. Why are they in jail?"
Sarah paused for another moment. "It's all Gertrude's fault," she repeated. "I think the girl likes to fight more than she likes to drink… and that's a lot."
So now Beckman was getting frustrated. "Who in the hell is Gertrude?" she asked.
"Gertrude Verbanski," Sarah said. "Casey's fuc… um, he's dating her."
"And why was Ms. Verbanski with you?" Beckman asked. "Weren't you supposed to be looking for Lopez tonight?"
"Um, yeah," Sarah said. "Chuck found him. We tailed him to a strip club. It was Chuck's bright idea to have me enter amateur night so we could keep tabs on him. Well, Casey said that it would be weird to have me with two guys. So he called Gertrude."
"Let me guess," Beckman said. "You dragged Bartowski into one of the private rooms and knocked his socks off."
Sarah started giggling again. "More than his socks," she said.
"And that started the brawl?"
"No," Sarah said. "That was all Gertrude. I guess she likes to fight more than she likes strange men to touch her chest."
"How did you get that mouse under your eye?"
Sarah touched her cheek. "Oh this?" she sighed. "This is nothing. Lopez got in a cheap shot. He hits like a pussy. I keep telling everyone. It's a lot easier to throw a kick when you're naked. The paramedics said he'll probably be out of the hospital in a few days. Casey says maybe you should put him into protective custody."
"Agent Walker," Beckman said firmly. "You are not to drive again tonight. Go into one of the living quarter's rooms and go to bed."
"I'm fine," Sarah protested. "I can drive home."
"That's an order," Beckman said. "Do you understand? I have to arrange for bail. At least I'll have someone sober who can tell me what in the hell happened tonight."
Fortunately bail wouldn't be necessary. Chuck and Casey came bounding down the stairs.
"Sweetie," Sarah said. She threw her arms around his neck and basically collapsed into him. "You're here."
Chuck was laughing. "Yeah, baby," he said in his best 50's gangster voice. "They haven't built the jail that can hold me."
Beckman had heard about enough foolishness for one night. "Colonel Casey," she said with no sense of humor. "Care to tell me who is with you? Why you would bring a civilian into a sensitive facility? And why in God's name would you involve her in a classified mission?"
Casey's face was most definitely red. "This is Gertrude Verbanski," he said. "She's not exactly a civilian. She volunteered to help with our cover. We didn't discuss anything classified."
Beckman already had her file on the screen. "Ms. Verbanski," she said. "I can see that you're duly deputized. Still this is highly unusual. I just want to advise you that repeating anything classified you hear tonight would be a felony."
Verbanski wasn't dressed any better than Walker, but at least she appeared a little more sober. "Yes, ma'am," she said. "I understand."
"Okay, Colonel," Beckman sighed. "Care to tell me what happened this time?"
"Yes, ma'am," Casey said. "Once Bartowski had… um, 'identified' the subject, we tailed him to a club. Once I scouted the area from the outside, it was plain that the subject was using it as a base of operations. He had far too many bodyguard types to try and take him on there. Well, it would have been odd for the three of us to wander into a strip club. Bartowski suggested…"
"That Walker enter amateur night," Beckman interrupted in a huff. "Yeah, I've already heard this part. You called Ms. Verbanski. I suppose neither of you had to spend much time talking the ladies into it."
"No, ma'am," Casey said. "I think that both were more than willing. Well, I'm not sure if you've ever been in one of those places."
"Oddly, I haven't," Beckman said. "Care to enlighten me?"
"Men kept buying them drinks," Casey said. "They are pretty competitive, seeing who could outdrink the other. It's tradition for the amateurs to give lap dances once they're naked. We were just going to stay and observe, but apparently someone crossed a line… and that started…"
"A brawl," Beckman interrupted again. "Yeah, I heard. What line could possibly be crossed with a naked woman giving some stranger a lap dance? Now we have a brawl in a public place with a covert subject. I suppose I'll be seeing this on the news."
"Actually, it worked out," Chuck interjected. "In the brawl, Lopez's bodyguards were all busy with other people. Sarah was able to subdue Lopez and we were all able to remain covert. The police found about a hundred kilos of cocaine. We were arrested but Gertrude was able to get us released on OR. Thanks to Sarah, Lopez is in the jail infirmary just waiting to be taken into federal custody. There is now one more drug ring that is no more."
Beckman could only shake her head. What was it about this team that they could crawl through a pile of fresh cow dung and always come out smelling like a rose? "Go home," she said. "We'll debrief more fully at a later time… when Agent Walker is sober… and dressed."
Sarah was still giggling as she was kissing Chuck's neck. "I have a better idea," she said. "I still owe you that lap dance. I'm sure that Gertrude has a similar debt to pay. It's still early and there are clubs like that all over."
"Let's find one with a chandelier."
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MDS A/N 3: Are you not entertained?! Well then leave a review! The guest authors would really appreciate you showing your love for their hard work and sacrifice.