a/n: After I recently found out that Gintoki is canonically 29 after the time skip, I was like oh no! How do I fit this into the story? Then I thought that probably more than half a year to a year has passed since Chapter 704 and Chapter 1 of this story anyway, so it sort of works out. In this chapter, he turns 31.
I believe there will be two more chapters after this. Thank you so much for the nice reviews last chapter, I really enjoyed reading them.
When Gintoki knocks on the door to one of Hattori's many apartment complexes, it's Sacchan who comes out, flinging her arms around him as if he's a long lost lover.
"Get off me, woman!" Gintoki yells, and pushes her off.
"Ah, but I've missed you sooooo much!" Sacchan sings, unperturbed by his rejection. "Gin-san has finally come to see me, right when I'm about to get hitched! This has to be the most exciting development that's ever happened to me since I got engaged! Will the rival from years ago come and claim his territory, igniting new flames? Or is he here to express regret over leaving the love of his life? Aah, it's so thrilling~ ❤!"
Gintoki pinches the bridge of his nose, resisting the urge to go home already. He makes a mental note to charge Zenzou a ten percent tip, because this errand, as much as it is deceptively easy, is equally as deceptively horrible. Sure, maybe he was sick of wedding planning, but how desperate was he to shove it onto a love rival, even if it went mostly unrequited? Weren't any of the other members of the Diamond Perfume gang free to go along with her antics?
"Don't get any ideas," he snaps at her. "Toe the line and I am leaving, do you understand?"
Sacchan fans herself, turning pink. "Oh, yes! More, Gin-san! Please treat me like the pig that I am - "
Fuck! He'd forgotten that telling her horrible things only turned her on. Most normal women (not that he was surrounded by them) would have considered everything about him a turn off, but this particular woman was far from normal.
The taxi comes to pick them up, and mercifully, Sacchan leaves him alone for five minutes, texting a few people here and there on her cell phone, and giving directions to the driver on where to go. Gintoki is idly staring out of the window before she snaps her mobile off, and turns to him with a smug, satisfied grin.
"So, I heard from Tsukki that you two made up."
"Don't self-project yourself onto other people's personal affairs, you sicko," Gintoki says, glaring at her. "And don't make up scenarios. It's very unbecoming of a blushing bride."
Sacchan is undeterred. "I think we've all established that I'm far from being a blushing bride, Gintoki."
Well. He couldn't argue with that.
"And. I think we've established that with the existence of the Love Potion Arc, there's ample evidence to conclude that you have feelings for - "
"I was under the influence of the incense," Gintoki growls, adamant on proving this fact over and over again. "And it was an Original Video Animation. S*nrise didn't even bother to include the episodes in the 2015 season, so how canon is it, really? I mean, we could even consider it filler at this point."
Sacchan is polite enough to let him finish, right before she sighs melodramatically, proving that she never listens to him unless he's directly insulting her. "Ah, I can't stand this suspense of this anymore! Watching you two is even worse than a Korean drama where they have to build up the romantic tension for thirty episodes, and then you rewarded with only one mediocre kiss! The worst part is that there won't be any love scenes, and when you really think about it, it brings up the question if BDSM enthusiasts will ever be portrayed in a healthy relationship - "
"Oi, I think you're getting a little off topic now! And if that's how you really feel about these shows, why do you keep watching them?!"
The driver seems to be used to her fits of insanity, because he hasn't budged from his seat, not even a little bit. Sacchan sighs again. "Gintoki, it is a complete tragedy that the bond between sadists and masochists are portrayed in such an inaccurate way in the media. Still, the bond that I will have with you will never change, no matter our circumstances!"
"There was no such bond between us, you sick excuse of a lady!"
" - and even with my looming marriage coming ahead, I truly wish for you to find a masochist worthy of being my successor - "
"Please, can you go ahead and die already?"
"I've always believed, with all my heart, that Tsukki would be proper replacement." Sacchan takes out a handkerchief and wipes away her imaginary tears. "I know you'd be the proper dominant to break those walls down, those cold, cold walls of hers, to flame a secret desire in her - "
"What kind of friend talks about another friend like this?!"
Sacchan blows her nose. "Please don't forget about me when you two are happily married and pushing around twins in a baby stroller. I know I'll be that ex-lover, thinking about all those times where we could have had it all, but - "
"Oi, I was never interested in you! Get it together, already! How do you think your poor fiancé feels, especially with you talking like this about me all the time?"
The driver stops in front of a fancy hotel, and for a moment Gintoki is distracted. He'd been so busy arguing with Sacchan that he hadn't noticed they were driving into the ritzier part of town.
Guess it was a good idea to wear the outfit he did before the time skip rendered their new clothes irrelevant...
Sacchan steps out of the car, and the valet bows to her before escorting the two of them into the lobby.
"Miss Sarutobi, how nice to see you again!" The receptionist greets them at the desk. She kind of reminds Gintoki a little bit like Ketsuno Ana, with brown hair and a charming smile.
"We're here for the cake tasting," Sacchan says, her voice equally as warm.
"Yes, of course madam. And this is your fiancé, I presume?"
"Ex-husband," Sacchan corrects her, all while Gintoki glares at her with the heat of a thousand suns. "Please don't mind him. He's a professional pastry chef, so I thought I'd rely on his experience."
The receptionist is a true professional, whose facial expressions betray nothing. "Of course, madam. Right this way."
"I didn't sign up for this!" Gintoki hisses into the ninja's ear, as they follow the receptionist to the elevator. "Keep up making lies and see if I don't just ruin this fancy wedding of yours - "
Sacchan widens her eyes in excitement. "Ehhhh? You really would? Oh, Gin-san, I would love that if it was you who did it - "
"Forget it," he snaps, defeated. No matter what he does, she's going to do whatever she wants. If he sparks joy into her life, who is he to ruin that?
They sit down at a counter and a chef with a moustache wheels in a cart with several silver plates of cake slivers.
Sacchan passes Gintoki a pen and piece of paper, eyes gleaming in triumph. "Write your ratings, and don't be shy, ex-husband."
Gintoki scoffs, but takes it anyway. "Fine, woman."
He'd been here to do a job in the first place, stalker or no stalker. And this one, at least, would pay him well.
To nobody's surprise, he's able to sample fifty different slices of cakes without feeling the need to throw up. There were quite a few gourmet flavors that he wasn't terribly fond of, but there were also a number of traditional flavors that he thought were appropriate enough to cater to all tastes.
Sacchan gives up after her twentieth sample, declaring that all this sugar consumption would be bad for her beauty. He rolls his eyes, but whenever he bites into a flavor that he thinks is promising, he pushes a plate towards her.
He's efficient, if nothing else.
They narrow it down to three choices - he's quite partial to the strawberry and cream, whereas she leans towards the salted caramel. The last choice, which they both agree on, is a dark chocolate and raspberry combo which melts in their mouths like butter. Once everything is wrapped up, Sacchan makes another appointment with the chef for another tasting date, nearer to the day of the wedding, and then they finally make their way down to the lobby.
"I suppose whichever flavor my darling likes the most, I'll pick," she chirps with excitement, shooting off a quick text on her cell phone to call the taxi. It's almost rush hour, so the noise of traffic is getting a little bit louder. As the weather shifts from summer to autumn, the wind gets a little bit chillier day by day.
"I'll bet you'll just rope him into salted caramel, won't you? In either case, I'm sure he won't give a shit about this, Sacchan."
The kunoichi tosses her hair back haughtily, somewhat miffed at his assessment. She snaps her phone shut and slips it back into her purse.
"Spoken like a true bachelor who doesn't believe in true love. It's a shame, Gintoki. You'd make a perfect husband."
"Love is a bunch of chemicals," he argues. "Once they wear off after the honeymoon period, and everybody's worst points come up, the whole thing comes crashing down. And what do you get? Divorce papers, after you find out she's been banging her personal trainer."
"Guess I'm lucky, then, that someone already saw the worst of me a long time ago."
Her response catches him off guard, because he'd expected her to argue with him. But instead, Sacchan smiles wryly, all pretences dropped, and somehow, she looks charming in that moment. In that space of contentedness, with the golden sun hitting her hair, she seems omniscient, as if she knows something he doesn't. His heart stops for a second, understanding that finally, the underdog has emerged as the true winner between the two of them. In that moment, he finally realizes that she'd been pretending to still be in love with him all this time, solely for his benefit.
She might have lost the battle, but at end of the story, she'd won the war.
What a fool he'd been.
He can't think of anything else to say to that, so he rummages around for a question.
"How did it happen?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, who made the first move?"
"What, are you jealous?" she teases, her glasses glinting in the sunset. "It's too late for me to get these security deposits back, Gintoki. Unless... ?"
"I'm serious! I just want to know."
"I'm pretty sure he did," Sacchan says, and her voice is softer, now. "Honestly, I don't remember."
Gintoki sometimes forgets that there are different faces that people show to others, and here is a prime example of that. Sacchan is, when she's away from him, more than a stalker. She's a capable assassin, a soon to be wife - a possibility he'd never considered before - and a best friend.
When had that happened?
He turns away, and there's a little bit of a lump in his throat when he says, "Is he the right one for you?"
Sacchan chuckles. "Do you think I would've given up on you if he wasn't?"
-x-
Shimura Tae wins four tickets to the movie theaters from the supermarket raffle ticket, and loads her purse with candy from the local Taiso shop to Kagura's everlasting joy.
Gintoki gets a licorice stick, which is probably way less than he deserves, but whatever. For Shinpachi, he's thrilled with his box of chocolate covered strawberries, and Kagura is the one that naturally gets spoiled, so she gets the lion's share of the treasure, which involves two boxes of Pochi, a pudding cup, and a jumbo sized bag of marshmallows in pastel colors.
"Don't start eating them until the movie begins," Gintoki warns her as they settle into their seats - a futile endeavour, he finds, as Kagura has already dug into an opened box of matcha-flavored Pochi.
"Let her do what she likes, Gin-san," Tae says and she unwraps her own, smuggled containers of Bargain Dash - strawberry flavored, he observes with a hint of envy. There's a piece of aluminum that used to wrap the ice cream in the thinnest sheet of dry ice; a testament to the power of Amanto technology. It was cheap enough to mass produce to where even ice cream doesn't even need to be immediately refrigerated anymore.
"Fine," he grumbles. In the corner of the theatre, he spots Kondo and Kyuubei, keeping a sharp eye on him.
Idiots. It wasn't as if he was on a date or anything.
The sixth sequel of Aliens versus Yakuza is a fun ride. There's a lot of monologing, with Jo-aniki declaring to the audience "Kill them all, or be killed!". It might even be an allegory for the remnants of the Jouishishi war, but Gintoki isn't one to do a deep analysis on a movie of all things and instead enjoys the special effects and the corny dialogue.
In between the action sequences his mind goes elsewhere.
It's not like him to snoop, but today is actually his birthday, and for all their valiant attempts of trying to hide the secret from him, he knows that there's going to be a surprise party waiting for him once the movie is over.
Idly, he wonders who is going to show up, because the last time they had a get-together in the cabaret club, there'd been a hefty amount of property damage. Most of it, he admitted, had been his fault, but there was another person who'd been just as notorious in the "please don't invite them to any more drinking parties" department.
Well, Hasegawa had been more than happy to work off the debt...
All of a sudden, there's an explosion on-screen, and his eyes snap back to the movie, happy to be distracted from thinking about that particular person. For now.
-x-
They make him close his eyes and he acts every bit the fool, biting back a smile as he listens to whispers of "Shhh! He's coming, keep quiet!" when they start to approach Otose's Snack House.
The door opens, and hollers of "SURPRISE!" echo throughout the bar, which has been transformed into a room considerably less grimy than its usual state. Paper flowers and chains hang from the ceilings, and there's a banner on the bar that says Happy birthday, Gintoki!
Even though he's left this part of town for the last two years, there are some things that he wouldn't change for the world. Thirty one, and he still never gets over the novelty of actual people, gathering around to celebrate his birthday. He blinks back the dew in his eyes, letting his hair droop over them ever so slightly before giving the motley crowd a big, cheesy grin.
"Welcome back, son," Otose says fondly, a familiar cigarette resting on her fingers.
Gintoki grumbles. "Granny, you know I've been here for almost a year already."
"Doesn't make it any less true," Otose replies, and with a quiet lift of her eyebrow, summons Shinpachi, who comes over with the strawberry shortcake, placing it on the nearest table. Kagura lights up the candles carefully so that the tiny flames won't go out.
It's Catherine who starts the Happy Birthday song, and then the rest of the motley crew joins in - Otose; in her slow and measured, husky voice, tempered by decades of smoking, Kagura; who sings off-key but with the genuine joy of a child, Shinpachi; who couldn't hold a tune to save his life yet tries anyway, and Tama; who is the best of them all, thanks to her AutoZune capabilities.
When they finish, and beckon him to blow them all out, he makes a silent wish: to never have to walk away from them, and this town, ever again.
Once the cake is sliced, the presents are bestowed on him, which is a new tradition that they've incorporated since the last time they'd ever celebrated his birthday. Having taken his company for granted, it'd been a bit of an impressive haul back then, but he hadn't expected it to continue. Not after leaving them for two years.
Shinpachi and Kagura present him another yukata - he'd been slowly accumulating a few more of them, so it was much appreciated. Otae would gift him a year-long pass to Snack Smile. Otose, Catherine, and Tama give him a bottle of aged, fine whiskey. From the Shinsengumi there was a box of homemade strawberry jam, imported from the Bushu countryside.
"Oh, Gin-san, there were more packages," Tae said, smiling. "The ninjas gave you a box of chocolates."
"Huh." They were shaped in the shape of shuriken. He'd probably put them under his secret underground stash later - Kagura would eat the whole lot of them otherwise. He hoped Zenzou hadn't poisoned them, but they'd been on pretty good terms lately, so maybe he hadn't.
Shortly afterwards, Catherine stood on the bar, proclaiming free drinks for everyone, and then the real party got started. Gintoki been so enamoured with everybody else that the guests had missed another package sitting on another table.
By that time the bar had been completely wrecked, he'd been a complete mess. Unconscious, even.
-x-
The package goes unnoticed for a few days until Tama knocks on his door, and Gintoki is grumpy because she had interrupted his afternoon nap.
"Gintoki-sama, I believe this is a birthday present from Tsukuyo-dono." The robot flashes him a smile. "Would you like me to scan the contents?"
He yawn and rubs his eyes, his bad mood mysteriously vanishing in seconds. "Nah, I'm good, thanks." He takes the package, before noting the hopeful look in her eyes. "I s'pose you'd want to find out what's in it, eh?"
"If you don't mind," the robot maid says politely, and he scoffs, before inviting her in.
"C'mon in then," Gintoki says gruffly. "I might even have a can of gasoline somewhere."
She takes a seat in front of the coffee table while he rummages in the kitchen. He finds a liter of diesel and a straw in the cupboard, and sets it down on the coffee table in front of her.
"When did she drop it here, anyway?"
"About noontime," Tama reports, and takes a sip of her fuel. "She told me that she couldn't come because of work."
"Typical," Gintoki replies without a touch of resentment. The present had been wrapped in newspaper with no touch of sentimentality whatsoever. He tears the paper apart and finds two bottles of...
Shampoo? And conditioner?
Tama giggles.
"For chemically straightened hair," she reads out loud while picking up one of the bottles, her eyes scanning its contents. "Perhaps she was under the impression that you were going to get a Brazilian blowout?"
Gintoki scowls. Unfortunately, his memory is better than he'd like it to be.
"Gin-san! We got something! One of Otose's customers gave us some information on Lady Suzuran!"
"SHEDDUP!"
"Oh, what a coincidence? Yer also buyin' some Sheddep for that mop you call hair?"
"It ain't Sheddep, it's Sheddup! I'm trying fix this natural perm, dammit!"
He rises from the table.
"I am going to kill her," Gintoki announces, before standing up to throw away the newspaper. "I don't care if I get my balls torn off. She has absolutely no right to emasculate me like that! How am I supposed to retain any self-respect, if I can't even go a single day without my hair being disrespected like this?!"
"But Gintoki - "
"I don't care if this is misogyny, dammit! Look at the downfall of society, with all these herbivore men bowing down to these carnivore women! Do you think we got this far on just the efforts of women?! It takes two to build a city, for God's sake - "
"Gintoki, there's something you forgot," Tama says, pointing out a small object on the floor. "It fell out while you were throwing away the wrapping paper."
-x-
Otose is the only one near him who has a library card, but she's grumpy about him borrowing it. He wheedles it out of her anyway, and when he slips away, tells the old woman that she'll won't miss it for too long when he's gone.
Besides, he doesn't have the money for an internet café, so the library will have to do.
The mystery is intriguing.
The assistant librarian comes and helps him plug in the USB stick into the monitor - which is the mysterious object that had fallen out of the package. He's not the most savvy with technology - he can handle the radio and television just fine, but anything to do with the internet is beyond his capabilities. The assistant is kind enough to open the files, and there's a folder with a title that says, "Read This" at the very top. She clicks on it and opens a word document, which is a letter addressed to him.
He clears his throat, and the assistant rises up to leave, smiling. "Let me know if you need any more help," she says, and he nods.
When he starts reading the letter, he can already imagine Tsukuyo struggling with the computer, eyes squinting, pipe in mouth as she slowly types the characters from the keyboard. The thought of it is somehow sweet and comforting, rather than funny. Love really has a way of smoothing away a person's idiosyncrasies, he thinks.
.
.
Dear Gintoki,
Shu*sha didn't start uploading their manga on the internet until you came back to the city last year, so I figured that this would be the easiest way for you to catch up in the time you were away. Do they have Shonen Weekly Jump in places outside of Edo? I wasn't sure, so I kept buying the volumes each week until it became a bit of a bad habit. Then Hinowa said it was ridiculous that I was buying so much manga without reading it, plus she complained that it was cluttering up the house. So I started collecting the tankoban volumes instead, and rented out a storage room for them. Unfortunately, they started to get a bit moldy, being that Yoshiwara is an underground city and all that, so I had to save them in a different way.
Once I figured how to scan all the pages properly onto the computer, I organized the chapters into numerical order for you. There's Punter x Punter, Gintaman, One Elbow Man... I wasn't sure which series was your favorite, so I decided to put all of them onto a memory stick. This one's supposed to be fool proof; I guess you can stick it into a tablet or a laptop, and it works the same way according to the shopkeeper. I even have a backup stick in case the files get corrupted, so don't worry if somehow you screw this one up.
I hope you like my gift, and happy birthday.
Tsukuyo
.
P.S. The shampoo and conditioner is supposed to be really good even if you never straighten your hair.
.
.
When Gintoki finishes reading the letter, he starts to laugh.
Fuck.
He's really in trouble now.
-x-
He's standing in a payphone near the library, an ancient relic after smartphones had taken over Edo. Still, he managed to find one, to his relief.
"You're sure about this?" Gintoki asks Sacchan.
"One hundred percent," the kunoichi says. "I'm positive of it. I wouldn't lie to you about this, I promise."
"Swear on it."
"Uh, I can't? We're on the phone, remember?"
He hangs up on her anyway, sighing to himself.
The USB stick feels like a hot coal of guilt in his pocket, but it also feels more reassuring than anything he's held in a while. After he steps out from the phone booth and into the afternoon sun, he thumbs it like a lucky stone of sorts.
Ketsuno Ana's forecast told him Libras were supposed to have good luck this morning, so he hopes with all his heart that today might be one of those days where nothing goes wrong. Still, when he ignites the engine on his motorbike, his heart is beating at a million miles a minute. He barely registers the traffic lights, and gets to the parking lot near the entrance of the underground district in record time. By now he's so familiar with where he's going that no one bats an eye when he finally stops in front of Hino-ya.
"Oh, Gintoki!" Hinowa slowly makes her way towards him, her cane supporting her legs. "It's not a Monday."
"Where is she?" he asks, and he's embarrassed that he's a little out of breath. Something twinkles in Hinowa's eyes. "She's on patrol shift. Block C, if you know where that is."
"Thanks," he mutters, before heading off.
He spots Tsukuyo interrogating some poor schmuck, and he's hanging on a thread, strung up with her kunai.
"Like I said," she says brightly, her voice tinged with a touch of sadism that makes him shiver involuntarily. "It's a bit unbecomin' for ya to keep grovelling at a courtesan that doesn't care for you, don'tcha think?"
"Of - of course! I - I won't d-do it again, I promise!"
"Better not be," the Sun of Yoshiwara remarks, and then throws a kunai at his forehead anyways, expertly knocking the fellow out.
She turns around only to see Gintoki staring at her impassively, and her eyes widen at the sight of him. "Oh! Wha - what are ya doing here?" she stammers, a faint blush decorating her cheeks.
"We have to talk," he says.
When she lifts an eyebrow, he shoves his left hand into his pocket, feeling the USB stick sitting there. Reassuring him. "Alone," he adds.
"All right," she says, shrugging, and they walk to an alleyway that's mostly secluded from the main walking street. She folds her arms together, composed and collected. As expected of the former Shinigami Dayuu.
"So what's up?"
"It's this," Gintoki says. He holds up the USB stick, and her face suddenly shifts into something more bland. More neutral.
He sort of fumbles the first question, but hell. It's a first for either of them, he supposes. "How long?"
"What do you mean?"
"How long... have you... "
Been in love with me?
But that thought - that singular thought - almost causes him to choke. He turns red at even thinking about saying it out loud.
Get it together, man! You couldn't make a move back then, but the time is now!
He coughs, and she blinks.
"Gintoki, are you okay? If you're not, then - "
He shakes his head vigorously. I am friggin' thirty one years old, he repeats to himself. I am not going to chicken out, I am not going to chicken out -
After he clears his throat, he looks at the ground. So uncool. He's the main character of a highly acclaimed Shonen Jump series, goddammit!
"Howlonghaveyoubeeninlovewithme?"
Now Tsukuyo is giving him a look of concern. "Sorry?"
He's already praying to the heavens above for a quick death, because he knows he's going to die of embarrassment at this rate. Infuriated, he casts a glare at the sky. Kill me now, Satan! Or God! Whoever's up there, hope you're having a good laugh right now because I'm certainly not!
Gintoki rubs his eyes and then takes a deep breath. "For Christ's sake, woman! How long have you been in love with me?"
Her eyes widen, and now the panic is rolling in like an avalanche. "Oh. Um... " Now she's steadily growing pinker and pinker. "I guess... I'm not sure?"
Okay.
He can work with this.
(Still, he's Sakata Gintoki, so he can't stop himself from cracking jokes even though he knows this is so not the time or place for it.)
"What kind of answer is that? Aren't you supposed to come up with some backstory when I did something unexpectedly sweet or - "
"Why do you care?" she snaps back, and her cheeks are so red that they nearly glow in the dark. "Are ya here to make fun of me? It just happened, okay? I didn't want it to happen, and trust me, if I had my way I woulda picked someone with way better hair and more money, but hey, I was unlucky enough to fall in love with you!"
He swallows. "I just thought... I thought you were friend zoning me."
Whether it's spring or winter, once in a while I like being next to you like this and blowin' poison gas in your face. That's enough to make me happy.
I wish to think of you as an equal.
Tsukuyo snorts, and turns her head away. "I was the bigger idiot for still liking you after the way you acted that entire arc," she huffs. "But really, I'm not that hung over it. I like you, but I figured I never had a chance."
"Are you kidding? I don't even have two hundred yen on me right now, much less two hundred million yen... " Gintoki sighs, and ruffles his hair. "What kind of attitude is that, giving up before the race even begins? You oughtta look at yourself in a mirror once in a while, Tsukki."
Her eyes narrow. "What are you saying, then?"
"I'm saying that I'm in love with you, too."
There's a pause, before the words sink in, and her blush turns even worse. She takes a step away from him.
"Gintoki, please don't make fun of me anymore. I'm beggin' ya, this isn't funny. Maybe this is how you get your kicks, but - "
"You want me to prove it to you?" he asks.
"I'm telling you, stop it - "
He holds up three fingers. "Keep your hands off my woman. The Shinigami Tayuu is eternally mine; I won't let anyone lay a single finger on her."
"But that was - "
One finger slips down, with two remaining. "When it comes to a woman I really want to make a move on, I can't do it like I usually do."
Her lips are pursed, but he's not panicking now, feeling more in control of the situation than he ever has.
Now all that's left is his index finger. He folds it down. "If it's what you want, I don't mind being only yours."
She chews on her lip. "You were under the influence of the incense. I - I don't... I don't believe you meant all those things."
"Is there any incense now?" he asks.
"No, but... "
"Then just shut up, okay? This is real. I'm trying to get my life in order to move on from my past, and I want you in it."
"But why?"
He sighs. For a woman that painfully, utterly, and damnably beautiful, it's almost a tragedy how she never gives a single thought to the possibility that maybe, just once, he might have reciprocated her feelings someday.
Maybe the real demon here is him, for making such a good woman sit on the sidelines while he's trying to get his head sorted out. Still... better late than never, he supposes. And it's not like he's a decrepit old man yet.
"You waited for me, Tsukuyo. You ... "
Saved me.
Made me feel like I wasn't alone.
Accepted me for who I am.
He turns away, and looks at the wall, suddenly overwhelmed. "You're the only one I could ever see by my side," he admits, and sighs. "I just... never got enough of my shit together, until now, to tell you."
Life just threw him enough curve balls to stop him from having a perfectly normal life, unrelenting in its honest brutality. He was mostly strong enough to handle them, one by one. But he'd known from an early age, he'd always wanted to be an ordinary man. Not a rich one, not a poor one, but just enough to eke out his own happiness.
And maybe... Maybe the person in front of him might be the key to unlocking all of those possibilities.
"Gintoki."
He looks at her, and sees her eyes shimmering with emotion.
"Did you mean it? All those things you said, long ago?"
This time, he doesn't turn his eyes away from hers. It's the wave of vulnerability that scares the shit out of him right now, but fuck it. He's faced scarier monsters than whatever he's feeling in his head right now. He's fallen into the abyss, walked through hell, lost almost everything he's ever had, including his own life at times - but what's mattered, even with every bad thing that's happened to him, is that he's lived to tell the tale.
And despite all of these circumstances, he's in the process of repairing his bruised, aching heart over, and over again, to where he finally feels brave enough for once to let someone else into the fold.
"I always did."
She chuckles, before taking his face into her hands.
"I always knew you'd come back," she whispers, right before kissing him.
And just like that, they fit together, perfectly. Like two parts, of a whole.
- tbc
a/n: Don't forget to leave a review, and let me know what you think!