Kurt was amazed, frankly, at how quickly Blaine pulled himself together. The man quickly wiped away his tears, and plastered a smile on his face when his little girl ran back into the room wearing her coat and all of her protective gear. As the group walked outside so Mackenzie could have her first go at the bike, Kurt was the only one not quite paying attention to that, and mostly kept his eyes on Blaine.

The breakdown that the other man had was so short lived, that Kurt could hardly believe it had happened. And while the news he broke seemed to weigh heavily on Kurt, Blaine was acting as if nothing had happened – and everything was fine. Of course, Blaine was probably genuinely happy for his daughter, and genuinely grateful for the gift, but that didn't explain his remarkable ability to shut off those emotions. It was a little disturbing, actually.

Kurt would have went inside after a couple minutes along with Carole to prepare the desserts, but he needed to finish this conversation with Blaine. So he stayed on the porch swing, bundled up in his coat, watching Blaine and Burt take turns holding onto Mackenzie's bike as she rode along the sidewalk. They didn't stay outside too long. It was cold, and getting very dark very fast. And apparently all it took was Carole yelling "Dessert!" to have the men and the little girl hustling back to the house.

Kurt held the door open as Mackenzie bolted through, still wearing her helmet and knee pads. Burt and Blaine were quick to follow, but Kurt put a hand on Blaine's shoulder preventing him from entering the house. "Blaine…" Kurt started.

"Kurt," Blaine said with a sigh, shaking his head, "I don't want to turn this into a big thing. I'm not trying to ruin Christmas Eve for anyone." It was impressive that Blaine could tell what Kurt wanted to talk about, but that didn't change the fact that they were going to have the conversation.

"You're not ruining anything," Kurt promised, closing the door so they could have their conversation in relative privacy. "Blaine, I've never seen you break like that. I just need to know you're ok."

"I'm fine!" Blaine said a little too quickly. Kurt gave him a look that he hadn't given anyone in a long time – one that said 'I know you better. Tell me the truth'. "Kurt… it's fine. We'll be fine. I haven't figured things out yet. But… we'll be fine."

We. Kurt still wasn't used to the 'we' of it all. "When did this happen, Blaine?" Kurt asked, having the sinking feeling that Blaine had been holding all of these emotions in for way to long. "When we had coffee Sunday everything seemed great."

Blaine sighed and let his smile fall. His shoulders fell a bit too, as if he was finally just accepting that he wasn't going to get out of the little talk. As if he was physically letting his guard down. "The company I work for is moving to New York," Blaine explained, eyes moving back up to meet Kurt's. "They offered for me to go along, but… it's not really feasible for us. I'm not going to make enough to live in New York. So I had to put my resignation before the wedding."

"That long ago?" Kurt asked, a little shocked. "Blaine, haven't you told anyone? Haven't you asked for help?"

"I didn't want to ruin the wedding," Blaine said simply. "So I didn't tell Sam or Brielle. And I didn't tell my mom because she'd want me to move in with her immediately. Which I also am vehemently avoiding. I've been trying to figure it out. But apparently since I have two other part time jobs, the state of Ohio has every right to deny me unemployment, despite the fact that there's no medical benefits coming from anywhere now," Blaine continued, his voice becoming fierier as he continued. His eyes narrowing as he explained. Kurt felt a pit form in his stomach when he realized how accusatory he'd seemed moments ago.

"Sorry… I didn't mean…"

"No, I'm sorry," Blaine said with a sigh, rubbing the back of his neck and letting his shoulders fall again. "I just… I don't know what I'm going to do but I just gotta keep things as normal as possible for Kenzie. And make sure that she keeps getting her medicine and doctors appointments and shots…"

"Daddy!" Speaking of Mackenzie… Kurt turned to see the front door open and a little face peeking out from behind it. "Daddy it's time for ginga-men!"

"Alright, I'm coming," Blaine said, turning to the door, and stepping inside, taking the chance to get away from Kurt's questioning as quickly as possible. He did hesitate and look back at Kurt briefly and say "We'll be fine. We always are." Kurt's heart broke at the way Blaine ended his statement. Always. It really had been a constant struggle for Blaine, hadn't it. But here he was bright eyed and bushy tailed and keeping it all together for his daughter.

Kurt didn't say much while the family was snacking on gingerbread men and apple pie. He didn't say much while they watched Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer - even though everyone else was singing along to the familiar tunes. He didn't say much while Mackenzie fell asleep on her father's lap, curled up in a tight little ball. Blaine held her firmly while continuing to converse with Burt and Carole, stroking her hair gently and rocking her just slightly whenever she stirred. He couldn't say much, because Kurt felt like the pit in his stomach would explode. All he wanted to do was yell at Blaine and ask 'HOW? How can you be so ok with this?'

He was also thinking. Hard. There had to be a solution. His dad could probably give Blaine advice – he'd been in politics. Kurt should probably tell Mrs. Anderson. Or Sam, if he could get ahold of him on his honeymoon. Neither of these seemed like good ideas either, though. There was one option that Kurt figured was probably the worst idea of them all, so he tried not to even consider it.

When Blaine said it was time to go home, Kurt went into Carole's office to gather the pair's coats. He even helped get Mackenzie's on without waking her. He had no clue if he was doing it right, or if there was a wrong way to do it, but Blaine seemed grateful and whispered "Thanks" as Kurt slipped the winter hat over the little girl's head.

Blaine gave a quiet goodbye to Carole, and thanked her extensively for the meal and the hospitality. Burt helped load Mackenzie's bike into the car as Blaine secured Mackenzie in her car seat. He hugged Burt, and thanked him. Kurt could see the glisten of tears in his eyes once more. They didn't fall though, and Burt probably didn't even notice. And as Burt turned to go back to the house, Kurt took a tentative step forward to say goodbye to Blaine as well.

"Thanks for coming, Blaine. I don't think my parents have had this kind of Christmas in… eons," Kurt admitted with a little laugh. He knew that his dad and Carole missed having kids in the house. This night would be special to them for a long, long time.

"Thanks for having us," Blaine replied. "Really, it was great to have somewhere to go on Christmas Eve and your parents are… just incredible. I can't thank them enough." Kurt nodded, arms folded across his chest more from being slightly uncomfortable then the cold. Though it was quite cold. "We should get going. It's way past her bedtime."

"Blaine…" Kurt said quickly before Blaine could say anything else or turn toward the already running vehicle. "Blaine I…"

"You don't have to worry about me Kurt," Blaine promised, a small smile on his face. Kurt knew that smile. It pulled at the corner of Blaine's lips whenever he knew what you were thinking or trying to say, but were too afraid to say it.

"Blaine… if… if you found a way to move to New York… would they take you even though you already resigned?" Kurt asked suddenly, biting his bottom lip after he finished the question. It was the worst idea of them all. But here he was, still about to offer.

"Uhm… I don't know," Blaine answered, a look of confusion crossing his face. "Why?"

"You know… I'd have to talk to James but we have a guest room and…" Kurt rambled quickly.

"Kurt, I couldn't," Blaine interrupted before Kurt could finish his thought.

"You could though, Blaine. I mean… yeah it'd be a little weird at first, probably. Tonight was a little weird for me. But I can't just… I can't go back knowing I could have helped and didn't." Blaine stared at Kurt for a moment, expressionless. Kurt swallowed hard, somewhat hoping that Blaine would say no. Somewhat hoping he rented the moving van tomorrow.

Blaine finally sighed, and hung his head just slightly. "Kurt… that would be… amazing if I could. I don't know… I don't know if they'll take me back and… I don't know if it'll work out."

"Well let's just keep the option open?" Kurt offered. "I know things between us are a little weird Blaine, but the way you broke down tonight… I've never seen you like that. And that's why I know this is the right thing to do. Because I know you need it, and I would just be adding to the list reasons to go to hell by not trying to help."

"Right beneath the gay thing?" Blaine asked smartly, immediately lightening the mood.

Kurt rolled his eyes, but had to laugh. "Yes, right after the gay thing."

"Alright, I'll look into it," Blaine agreed, finally.

"Me too. I'll talk to James. And mom and dad to see if they have any ideas. If you don't mind."

"That'd be great, Kurt," Blaine said with a smile. "Thank you. For everything." Kurt simply nodded in response to the thanks. He let his arms fall from their crossed position and hang a bit before stepping forward and giving Blaine a tentative hug. It took a moment for Blaine to respond – he must have kind of been surprised by the gesture. But when he did, he hugged Kurt tight and strong, causing the taller man to tighten his embrace as well. "Merry Christmas, Kurt," Blaine said softly.

"Merry Christmas, Blaine.

From the Text Messaging Archives of Kurt Hummel

Thursday, December 24, 2020

11:26 am

Rachel: Merry Christmas, Kurt! How was dinner with the Andersons?

Kurt: I don't think that I could possibly explain to you over text.

Rachel: That bad?

Kurt: I wouldn't say 'bad'?

Kurt: I may have offered my extra bedroom to Blaine and his daughter…

Rachel: Goddamn it Hummel. You're never going to get married are you?

From the Text Messaging Archives of Kurt Hummel

Friday, December 25, 2020

1:03 am

Kurt: I have a favor to ask… A pretty big one at that

James: Sure, Kurt. Anything.