Chapter seven

Let it all out

Anna took a deep breath.

Okay, you can do this.

It was still early, but not by the park's standards. Already, the parking lot was half full, the vast expanse of blacktop crammed with cars of all shapes and sizes. The peaks and loops of various roller coasters were just visible over the park's walls, hilltops on the horizon, and the cheers and screams of thousands of guests were barely audible, like a soft breeze.

And the memories were already flooding back to her. Both good and bad, of her family and of Him. Only, He was still just him back then, not Him. This was before all the bad things – well, most of them, anyway – before she had known what kind of-

She breathed in again.

None of that matters now. Stop thinking about Him. It's just me and Elsa here today, and I'm going to have a good time, no matter what. Stop thinking about Him.

She began her trek across the parking lot, feeling the sun beat down on her. It wasn't too hot yet, but she knew it was going to be sweltering. Today, though, she felt well prepared for once. She had applied generous quantities of both deodorant and sunscreen before departing the house.

"If you just used more sunscreen, maybe you wouldn't have so many freckles. Your skin would be flawless if not for-"

Anna shook her head vigorously. Goddammit, I said to stop thinking about Him!

She forced herself to think of better times, of the many times she and her family had come there. Memories of Him still cast a shadow over them, more vivid than the others due to their recency. The fact that they were, for a time, happy memories did nothing to help.

Well, that just means that this date will overshadow that one, she reasoned. I hope.

Gradually, the screams of distant riders were drowned out by the bustle of pedestrians. The front gate drew near, and to its left Anna saw the first of the many long lines they'd be a part of that day.

Spotting Elsa was easy enough. Rather than waiting in the line, she was lounging against the gate, looking casual in a green tank top – okay, picking up a pattern here – and khaki shorts. The knapsack on her back should've looked comical, but she wore it with confidence and pulled it off.

"Hey, Elsa!" she said, waving at her sister – not sister, Elsa Schneider, remember? – and trotting towards her. Elsa pushed off the wall and quickly closed the distance, opening her arms wide. Anna eagerly embraced her.

Then, as they hugged, Elsa kissed her. On the lips, once again.

See, Anna, Elsa thought, I'm just as comfortable with it as you are.

And Anna thought, ohmygodohmygodohmygod

"Good to see you again, Anna," Elsa said, her voice and face calm and composed as could be. "How's your weekend going?"

"Uh, good," Anna said, schooling her features into what she hoped was an expression just as cool as her sister's - date's - was. "How's yours?"

"Ugh, stressful," Elsa said. "Studying, doing practice exams, banging my head against my textbooks – it's a headache."

"Oh, sorry to hear that," Anna said.

Elsa smiled and shook her head. "It's fine. The whole time, I was just thinking about this trip, about spending time with you. That's what kept me going."

Anna's heart swelled with warmth. "Really?"

"Well, that, and a 32 ounce can of Monster," she admitted. "But mostly that."

She pulled out a pair of tickets from her knapsack. "Come on, let's head in before the lines get too long."

"You have those already?" Anna said in amazement. "You must've gotten here early."

"Nah, I just ordered online and printed them out," she explained. "I don't know why more people don't do that."

"Well, not everyone's as thoughtful as you," Anna said, grabbing one.

Elsa put on an air of mock haughtiness. "Oh, praise me some more, Miss Arendelle," she said in a fancy voice.

Anna chuckled. "No, I'm serious," she said. "You're one of the most thoughtful people I know."

Elsa smiled warmly, a faint blush appearing at her cheeks.

The crowd of people steadily thickened as they approached the gate, a sea of thrill-seekers bottlenecked by five turnstiles.

"Geez, it's gonna be hard to stick together here," Anna said, having to shout over the crowd.

"Don't worry," Elsa called back.

Elsa held out her hand. Anna grasped it, and Elsa intertwined her fingers with hers.

"Just like we used to do!" Elsa declared as she weaved through the crowd, Anna in tow.

Anna nodded. Although it felt slightly different now…

xxxxxxx

"So, Helios's Journey is way over there, in the back," Anna said, pointing at the park map Elsa had grabbed. "The line's probably already an hour long by now."

Elsa nodded. "Which is why we aren't going on it."

"Huh?" Anna said, confused.

"At least not right away," Elsa explained. "Most of the people here probably only came to try that ride, and they're all making a beeline for it." She gestured at the flow of people they had stepped out of to illustrate. "Which means all the other rides in the park should be almost empty for most of the morning."

Anna looked at her. "You're a gosh-darn genius, you know that?"

Elsa grinned. "Yes."

She looked back down at the map. "Let's see," she said. "We've got the Ferris wheel, the Scream Queen, the Dueling Dragons, Thunderstruck-"

Anna pointed at the map. "Ooh, the teacups!" she said excitedly. "I haven't been on those since…" She trailed off and looked at Elsa. "Never mind."

Elsa frowned. "What's wrong?"

Anna stared at her shoes. "Well, it's kind of a kiddie ride, right?" she said. "I bet you wouldn't be interested."

Elsa smiled encouragingly. "Sure I would!" she said. "I loved those things too, you know!"

"Well, all right, then!" Anna said, grabbing Elsa's hand. "Let's do it!"

Elsa followed behind her, hastily folding up the map.

Good idea to do that one this early, too, Elsa thought. Before we've had anything to eat.

xxxxxxx

The teacups? Really?

Yeah, why not?

Come on, Anna, that ride's for babies! We're here for the thrill rides!

Oh…okay.

Come on, let's do the Scream Queen.

S-sure, I like that one.

Atta girl! Let's do it!

Anna shook her head, as if she could physically dislodge the memory from her brain. Ahead of them, the teacups slowed to a stop, then disgorged their passengers, who stumbled semi-dazedly to the exit. A few of them looked ready to do some disgorging themselves.

The two of them hopped into the nearest cup, and Anna eagerly grabbed the wheel. Elsa, who moved at a more leisurely pace, giggled.

"You're cute when you get excited, you know that?" she said. Anna stuck out her tongue, but internally she glowed at the compliment.

The cups began to spin again, and the music started up. It was tinny and low quality, but she didn't care.

A new memory bubbled to the surface, an older one this time. Eight years back, the last time she was on this ride, it had been her, Elsa, and Mom. She and Elsa had spun the wheel as hard as they could, but Mom had held it tightly, keeping their rotations slow and controlled.

She looked at Elsa with a sly grin. Elsa nodded. Without a word, they both tugged at the wheel, spinning it clockwise.

The cup lurched, rapidly accelerating. The two kept turning, and the teacup spun faster and faster. Anna started sliding along the seat and had to adjust her posture to stop from sliding out altogether. Elsa's braid whipped around gaily, and Anna's hair flowed freely as well. Anna laughed at the sensation, enjoying the feeling of the wind on her face once again. She looked out the side of the teacup and saw only a blur, the park flying by in a whirlwind.

Soon, she wished she hadn't. She felt her stomach lurch, and her head started to realize how fast they were spinning. She looked forward and down, at her hands, which were still turning the wheel. She let go, but the queasiness continued to build.

Anna looked up at Elsa. She began to open her mouth, then stopped.

Elsa's eyes were closed and her arms were up in the air. She was smiling ear to ear, and it looked like she was laughing, too. She was so content and carefree, without a hint of her usual restraint.

Anna's entreaty to slow down died in her throat. A little motion sickness wasn't going to make her bring her sister down from this high. Instead, she threw her own arms up and enjoyed the ride, rising turmoil in her stomach be damned.

Besides, it's not like I'm gonna-

xxxxxxx

Breathe deeply, that's the key. Deep breaths of some nice, clean oxygen.

She was bent over, hands on her knees, just outside of the teacups. She felt a hand on her back, probably Elsa's.

"That's it," Elsa said soothingly. "Just take it slow. Inhale, exhale."

Elsa flagged down a passing park employee. "Get me one of those, please," she said, holding out a ten dollar bill and pointing at something on a nearby stand. The man nodded, and she turned back to Anna.

Anna continued to stare at the pavement. "It's still moving," she mumbled.

"What?"

"The ground's still moving," she said, swaying. She wiped some sweat off her forehead. "Tell them to turn it off, before I...make another mess."

"If you have to do it again, do it," Elsa said. "Don't try to hold it in, that just makes it worse."

Anna glanced up at her. "I know how puke works, Elsa," she said sardonically.

Elsa bristled, and Anna lowered her eyes again. "Sorry," she said.

"It's okay," Elsa said, continuing to stroke her sister's back. Her gentle touch soothed her immensely.

Anna wiped her forehead again. The early morning heat felt much more oppressive now.

"Did I get you at all?" she asked.

"No, actually," Elsa answered. "I think you turned your head at the last moment."

"Well, that's good, at least," Anna said.

Suddenly, she felt a cool mist hit the back of her neck. She turned around, surprised, and saw Elsa holding a newly purchased misting fan.

"How's that feel?" she asked.

"Wonderful," Anna said gratefully. "Get my face next, please?"

Elsa obliged, then spritzed her arms and legs, then returned to the back of the neck. Anna sighed deeply, the cool water soothing and refreshing her.

"Oh, that feels so good," Anna moaned. "You're a lifesaver."

Elsa blushed at the compliment. "Thanks," she said.

"I mean it," Anna said, standing herself up straight. She wobbled a little, so she put her hands on Elsa's shoulders to steady herself. "You're always looking out for me like this. Whenever I screw up, you've got my back."

Now Elsa was really blushing. "Don't give me too much credit," she said. "After all, it was kinda my fault to begin with."

Anna blinked. "Your fault?" she said, puzzled.

"I stopped paying attention," Elsa said. "I should've noticed you were getting queasy, but I let my guard down."

Anna had mostly recovered now, and she squeezed Elsa's shoulders. "Now hold on just a minute, Elsa Schneider," she said. "I seem to recall that I was turning the wheel just as fast as you were. Plus, it was my idea to ride in the teacup, and it's my breakfast that's all over it right now."

"Well, yeah, of course, but I could've-"

Anna looked into her eyes. "It's my fault, Elsa. I made the choice, and I suffered the consequences."

Elsa wilted. "Well, I don't like to see you suffer," she said quietly.

Anna struggled to think of a good response, so she went for a hug instead.

"I appreciate that," she whispered. "A lot."

"I'm glad," Elsa whispered in return.

Once they pulled away, Anna chuckled. "I'd have gone for a kiss on the cheek, but…" She breathed on her hand and smelled it, then grimaced.

Elsa laughed. She reached into her knapsack and pulled out a bottle of water, small remnants of ice cubes floating in it.

"Drink this," she said. "Then we can talk about kissing."