Chapter ten

Against a wall

The teacher was droning on about something, as she was wont to do.

From the context clues Anna picked up in the brief moments where she snapped herself back to attention, she appeared to be talking about the cosine and tangent, with chalkboard drawings to match. However, as soon as Anna verified that she already knew everything the teacher was talking about, her mind went back to Angel Island.

She couldn't remember the last time she'd had that much fun at the park. Even her trip with Hans hadn't been as enjoyable, even in the moment. She'd never felt as much adrenaline on those rides as when she was hand on hand with Elsa. Even the teacups were more of a hilarious memory than a painful one. It'd been nonstop fun, start to finish…

xxxxxxx

Elsa walked her to her car, cradling her in her arm. "That was a good time, huh?" she said gently.

"You bet! Anna said. "We have to do this again sometime soon."

"Yeah," Elsa said. "Once I've had time to recover from this trip."

Anna sucked her teeth. "Ooh, yeah," she said, regarding Elsa's burnt skin. "Does that hurt?"

Elsa smiled. "Not much," she said. "I meant recover mentally. It's been…quite a rush."

Anna thought about the Ferris wheel. "You can say that again," she said dreamily.

An awkward silence followed. It occurred to Anna that she might have been talking about Thunderstruck instead.

"So, uh, when can I expect to see you again?" she said.

Elsa frowned thoughtfully. "Hmm, well, I'm busy all week with study groups. I'm sure you've got plenty of studying to do, too."

"I guess," Anna said, though in truth, she felt very confident about most of her exams already.

"But, this Friday," Elsa continued, "I could stop by the house, grab the car, and pick you up after school."

"Sure!" Anna said. "What do you want to do?"

"Well, it's supposed to be crazy hot that day," Elsa said. "So how about we go grab some ice cream?"

"I'd love that!" Anna declared, a small hop punctuating the sentence.

Elsa giggled, then attempted to hide it. "A-And hey," she said. "Now that you know the ropes of dating, maybe you could ask someone out yourself."

"Oh yeah, I could," Anna said. "I hadn't even thought of that."

Elsa smirked. "Well, that was kinda half of the reason we started doing this in the first place."

"Yeah, yeah," Anna said good-naturedly. "I was just focused on the other half, that's all."

Elsa nodded. "Me too," she admitted. "But now's your chance to share the genius lessons I've taught you with some lucky guy or girl."

Anna laughed. "Girl," she said. "Definitely girl."

Elsa clasped a hand on her shoulder. "Hey, good to hear it! You did your homework, then?"

Anna nodded. "Right after I got back from the movie." She blushed. "And a few more times on Saturday."

Elsa laughed. "Nothing wrong with that," she said. "So yeah, now that you know what you like, you can go out and get some for yourself!"

Anna smiled. "I'll do my best," she said modestly.

"You'll do great," Elsa assured her. "There isn't a girl on the planet who wouldn't be lucky to have you."

Anna beamed from the excessive praise. "Well, I'm no Elsa Schneider, that's for sure," she countered. "But you're right, I am pretty amazing."

"Damn straight," Elsa said. She gave Anna a departing hug, which Anna returned gingerly, accounting for Elsa's burnt skin, and they went their separate ways.

It was a happy, carefree Anna that hopped into her car. She was physically exhausted, but her spirits had never been higher.

I'll look for someone to date, she thought. But I don't know if I'll be able to stop thinking about you long enough to try it.

xxxxxxx

Anna frowned. Now that she thought about it, that was kind of a weird thought to have, wasn't it? I might not be able to find a date because I'll be thinking about my sister? She started thinking critically about these thoughts, as her pencil drifted idly across her notepad

True, she was thinking about Elsa a lot, but that was hardly unusual. She thought about Elsa all the time. It was hard not to – she was funny, cool, athletic, beautiful, and so much more. But it was never romantic, right?

It was the lack of experience that was the problem, really. Like Elsa said, she'd never had a good boyfriend or girlfriend before, so she didn't know what that felt like. But you could turn that around just as easily – she didn't have any other siblings, either.

Damn it, this was exactly what Punz warned me about – her emotions clouding her judgement. Elsa helped me out by being a fake girlfriend. Now that's done, and I just need a real girlfriend. Plain and simple.

She lifted her pencil, and took a look at what she had been drawing.

EA + AA

4EVE-

Argh!

She turned over to the next page and forced herself to drop the pencil.

Okay, so it's clearly not that simple. But that's on me. I'm the confused one – Elsa made her intentions clear from the start. But I can fix that. As soon as I find a real girlfriend, this will all be fixed. For now, though…

She turned back to the previous page, erased one of the letters, and wrote a new one in its place.

ES+AA

That's a start.

xxxxxxx

The bell rang, and she and the rest of the class filed out the door. Anna headed for her locker, purpose established, until a familiar voice called out to her above the clamor of the crowd.

"Yo, Anna!" Eugene called, waving an arm. Anna worked her way over to him, and they walked together.

"Hey, Eugene!" Anna responded jovially. "What's up?"

"Not much with me," he said. "How'd your smoking hot date go?"

Anna burst out laughing. "It went great, thanks for asking."

"Yeah?" Eugene said. "This 'Elsa' chick seems like she's on the up and up?"

"Oh yeah," Anna said, nodding with mock sincerity. "In fact, I think I might even introduce her to my family soon."

Eugene chuckled. "Well, that's good to hear," he said. "So, you think you're playing for the other team, for sure?"

It took a couple seconds for Anna to figure out what he meant. "Oh, yeah. Definitely looking for girls."

"All right. Can't say I blame you," he said. "I mean, some guys are nice and all, but I know I wouldn't fuck one."

Anna laughed again. It was always so liberating to talk to Eugene. It was as if the man had no stress or fears whatsoever.

The crowd was thinning now, and the two of them came to a fork in the hallway. "Well, I'd better get going," Eugene said. "Shang's gonna have my ass if I'm late for gym again."

"Oh no, not your ass!" Anna said, putting her hands to her face in mock horror.

Eugene laughed. "See you at lunch, Anna."

"See you!"

Anna went on her way, picking up the pace when she noticed the crowds around her thinning out. She hadn't thought she was being especially slow, but by the time she reached her locker, the halls were all but deserted. She deposited her books and grabbed the next set.

"There you are."

Anna froze. His voice rolled over her like a cascade of poisoned honey. "Go away, Hans," she said.

She turned around, books in hand, to see him standing there, arms stretched to either side of him. "What, already?" he said in insincere indignation. "After I go through all this trouble to track you down, you want to leave before hearing what I have to say?"

Trepidation once again rose within Anna, but this time it was drowned out by a rising anger. "The only thing I want to hear from you," she said, "is 'I'm sorry, and goodbye.'"

Hans sighed condescendingly. "Still on this, I see," he said. "I still don't see why I should apologize. You're the one who's being hysterical."

"Hys-" Anna said, before catching herself. Now her anger was growing stronger.

Standard Hans tactic. I'm angry, and he's calm. She forced herself to bite down her angry retort.

Damn it, he always does this. I know exactly what I want to say to him, but I never get the chance, because he always keeps me on the defensive!

Case in point, Hans stepped forward, holding out a conciliatory hand. Anna stepped back.

"So anyway," he continued, as if he hadn't just insulted her, "I heard that The Moon Has Two Faces is gonna be in theaters next week."

Anna's blood ran cold. Oh god, he can't be serious.

He took another step forward and reached for her shoulder. She tried to twist away, but he grabbed it anyway. "I know you're gonna go see it," he said in a lower, more sultry voice. "But you shouldn't have to see it alone."

His grip wasn't tight, but it still felt like ice was running up her arm. She went stiff, and her brain started shifting into fight-or-flight mode.

The principal's office, a part of her mind said. Get to the principal's office. But the office was far away, and Hans was right here. Her back was against the wall.

She wished she were anywhere but here. She wanted to be with Elsa, or Punz, or Eugene, or-

Elsa.

An idea struck her, and it jolted her into action. She brushed away his arm, and quickly stepped to the side, away from Hans and the wall.

"Thanks for the offer," Anna said, emphasizing the first word so hard as to make the sarcasm crystal clear. But I've already asked someone to go see it with me."

Hans arched an eyebrow. "Oh, really?" he said. "Just a week after blondie, you've already got another date? That's impressive. Unreal, some might say."

Anna shrugged. "Fine, don't believe me, then." She started to walk away calmly.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Hans said, darting in front of her. "That's it? You're not gonna put any more effort into it? Tell me this guy's name, what he's like, how he could totally kick my ass – any of that?"

"Oh, that last one's probably true," Anna said. "She takes kickboxing lessons."

Hans was taken aback for a moment, but he recovered quickly. "Oh, that's how it is, huh?" he sneered. "You're a dyke now?"

The slur registered in Anna's brain, a verbal barb meant to case as much pain as possible. Had he used the word against Elsa, it would've infuriated her. But, having just discovered she was a lesbian a few days ago, it didn't hurt Anna nearly as much. She recognized it for what it was – a petty attempt to knock her off-kilter.

She shrugged. "Guess so."

The sneer was still on his face, but Anna could see in his eyes that he was getting upset that his insults weren't landing.

"So, anyway," Hans said, trying to regain the upper hand, "tell me about this girlfriend of yours. What's so much better about her than me?"

A thousand possible answers flitted through Anna's mind, but for some reason the Ferris wheel floated to the top of them.

"Well, for one thing," she said, "she tastes better than you."

"WHAT?" Hans said, jaw dropping.

Then, a moment later, he realized what she actually meant. "Oh, heh, you meant kissing," he said, attempting to regain his composure. "Not much I can do there. Girls taste better than guys."

Well, you could brush your teeth once in a while, for one thing, thought Anna. But instead of voicing this sentiment, she decided to capitalize on the moment.

"Right, kissing," she said. "On the…lips."

His face betrayed nothing, but she noticed his hands starting to clench and unclench, like they always did when he got angry. He noticed she was looking at them, and stopped.

"Okay, sure," he said. "But that's not enough of a reason."

Since when do you get to decide what's enough of a –

Again, she stopped herself. He's angrier than me right now, let's keep it that way.

"Well, for another thing," she said, "she doesn't feel the need to pick at my flaws and imperfections in order to make me feel insecure."

"Oh, Anna, you've got it all wrong," Hans said. "I like you even with your imperfections. Your freckles aren't enough to-"

"Well she loves my freckles," Anna interrupted. "All of them." She smiled wickedly. "Even the ones you never got to see."

"Ha ha ha," Hans said with a smile that didn't reach his eyes. "You almost had me for a moment, but now I know you're making this up. Ha ha ha." Clench, unclench.

Anna didn't feel the need to respond, instead letting her lingering smile speak for itself.

Strictly speaking, he was absolutely correct. Elsa was her fake girlfriend. But at the same time, Anna hadn't yet lied, just implied. Thus, she couldn't really get mad at his accusations.

"So, does this chick have a name?" Hans asked. "Or should I give you some time to make one up.

Anna snorted. "I'm not stupid, Hans. I'm not telling you her name." He opened his mouth for a snarky retort, but she kept going. "But I'll give you a hint. If you want to know her initials, you can find them four feet up a tree in Angel Island, inside a poorly drawn heart. I'm sure you know the one."

Hans was apoplectic. His mouth opened and closed, in sync with his hands. Then he bared his teeth.

"That was ours," he snarled, in a voice that made Anna take a step back. But she gathered her courage and responded.

"Yes, it was ours," she said defiantly. "Just like you were my boyfriend. But I dumped you. So get over it."

Hans started at her, fuming. Anna had never seen him this bad. She turned her feet, preparing to run, but she didn't break eye contact.

Finally, Hans relented. "Fine," he said. "You want to act like a child? I'll be the grown-up and walk away. But this isn't over."

He pulled out his headphones from his pocket, presumably with the intention of putting them on and casually walking away. Unfortunately for him, they snagged on something else in his pocket, and he was stuck fumbling around with them. Eventually he gave up and just stormed off.

Anna let out a huge sigh of relief. She had been seconds away from bolting, but she'd held her ground. She also let out all the tremors she had been suppressing, shivering heavily. She turned around and headed for the principal's office, barely believing what had just happened.

She'd won. She'd won. She had told Hans how she felt, in no uncertain terms, and he backed off – for now, at least. She had been so afraid of this confrontation, but somehow she'd managed to pull it off. Thanks to Elsa's help, she had managed to-

Huh, Elsa. I really said Elsa was my girlfriend.

It was justified, of course. Her back was literally against the wall, and she couldn't think of anything else. And she had no fear of Hands figuring out the truth – she never told him about her sister, and even if she had, he wouldn't have been paying enough attention to her to remember. Still, she really hadn't been planning on telling anyone about it.

Whatever, it wasn't a big deal. Starting at lunch today, she'd be looking for a real girlfriend. And nobody could possibly be worse than who she was leaving behind.

And so Anna walked away with her head held high, and didn't look back.

Which is why she didn't see the glower Hans shot at her from the end of the hall.