Chapter twenty-seven
A week without
They wanted to do nothing that day. So that's exactly what they did.
For the first time that summer vacation, though surely not the last, the two of them spent most of the day on the couch, TV and laptops on. After all the insanity last night had brought, it was comforting to be doing something normal again. Anna eventually took that shower she'd been needing and returned in her pajamas, which she'd stay in for the rest of the day.
Elsa's hangover gradually faded, helped by a few glasses of water. As it did, her sitting position shifted back, from hunched over her laptop to reclining against the couch, sinking into the cushion. Her mind was still reeling, as was Anna's, but through the time honored strategy of slacking off, both of their concerns steadily faded into background noise.
Lunch time saw Elsa bringing out the tea trays, and they feasted on Ramen with actual chicken, a classic quick Elsa dish. Elsa seasoned hers with garlic powder, now that kissing wasn't on the menu anymore. A snack of cheese and crackers followed, with a dinner of frozen pizza – who could ask for more?
The real jackpot came around 7, when Elsa flipped through the channels and found X-men: First Class – that one earned her a high five from Anna. After that, they both agreed that it would be high time to get some sleep.
They had been inching closer to each other the whole day, the space between them getting smaller and smaller. Now, as the movie started, they met in the middle. After a few minutes of nervous back-and-forth in her head, Elsa slung an arm around her sister. The touch surprised her, but it was a pleasant surprise. Sisters do still hug, after all.
They hadn't turned any lights on, so the room darkened as the movie went on. As night fell, so did Elsa's head, drooping lower and lower until it hit the couch. Soon, she began to snore lightly, a sound that Anna had always found adorable, ever since she was about five. Her arm remained around Anna, and Anna braced it with an arm of her own around Elsa's waist.
Anna still felt arousal, of course. Couldn't just turn that off, no pun intended. But she found herself more than capable of restraining her desires. Elsa's hugs had been a fact of life for years, and they meant so many things to her – comfort, inclusion, and above all, safety.
Oh, I'm so glad sisters still hug.
Eventually, the movie ended. Anna remained where she was for a few minutes before stirring her sister. "Hey," she said quietly, as Elsa woke up. "Movie's over. Bedtime." She grinned. "And I'm not gonna carry you. Sorry to disappoint."
Elsa chuckled sleepily. "That's okay," she said, pushing herself off the couch. "I'm too fat for it, anyway."
Anna shook her head, chuckling. "Elsa, how many freaking times do I have to tell you-"
"I know, I know," she said. "A teeny, tiny bit of it is muscle."
Anna sighed. "That's a start, at least."
The two made their way up the stairs. A long overdue tooth-brushing later, they prepared to depart to their rooms. Elsa beckoned Anna to her, and delivered a final bone-crushing hug for the night. "Thanks for humoring me on this," she whispered into Anna's ear.
Anna smiled. "It's my pleasure," she whispered back. They were normal whispers, not the sultry kind Anna had been practicing.
Lying in bed, the peace Anna was feeling quickly translated into sleepiness. She still didn't really have any kind of official definition of what sisters wouldn't do that girlfriends would, but she realized that she didn't really need to, either. Running a quick search on Google, she'd found no definitive answers to where the line might be, aside from the painfully obvious. It was up to the sisters themselves to decide what was acceptable and what wasn't.
If one of us goes over the line, we'll know. There's nothing set in stone about being sisters – or girlfriends, for that matter. We'll do what we're comfortable with, nothing more, nothing less.
'Nuff said.
xxxxxxx
"Welcome to Vito's Pizza and Pasta!" Mary said as they walked through the door, all smiles.
"Table for two," Anna said.
"Of course, dear. Right this way."
Elsa and Anna followed her through the mild crowd that Sunday evening had brought. They ended up at a small, secluded table, far enough away from the largest group. The booth from their previous visit was now occupied by a family of four, providing an incentive to not stare at it the entire time.
They were both in a lasagna-y kind of mood, so that's what they ordered. Elsa had, regrettably, worn a white shirt, but that didn't stop her from devouring the food when it came. Anna did the same, reflecting that being in non-girlfriend mode had its perks. They dined quietly, exchanging a couple of words here and there.
"So," Elsa said, "I'm gonna be on campus all day Monday. I've got some end-of-year stuff I need to wrap up."
"Okay," Anna said. "Punz and I have been talking about having another sleepover, I'll see if she's up for it tomorrow."
"That sounds wonderful," Elsa said. "How's she doing these days?"
"She's good," Anna said.
Another silence followed, but this one felt loaded. Elsa could sense that something was on Anna's mind. "Everything all right?" she asked.
"Yeah, I'm just…pondering," she said."
"Well, by all means, ponder aloud," Elsa said.
"All right." Anna folded her hands. "Elsa, do you like Kent State?"
"Yeah, I do," Elsa said. "It's a nice big campus, I get the chance to meet people from all over the world, and it's real close to home. It's a great place." She smiled. "Thinking about your future?"
Anna nodded.
"Well, don't limit yourself to just the nearest one," Elsa said. "With your brains, you could go to any school you wanted! Yale, Harvard…any of them."
Anna smiled. "Maybe I'll get my master's at one of those schools," she said. "If I get my bachelor's degree at Kent, and a master's at Harvard, I've still got a master's from Harvard, but that's four years of paying Kent tuition instead of Harvard."
Elsa blinked. "Damn, you've thought this out."
"I have."
Elsa chuckled. "Well, there you have it. You're not just smart enough to go to Harvard, you're smart enough to not go to Harvard! That's a whole 'nother level!"
Anna blushed at the compliment. "Nice of you to say so," she said.
"Wouldn't say it unless I meant it," Elsa assured her.
Anna looked in her eyes. "But you know, that's not the main reason I'm applying to Kent. Kent State has something no other college in the world has."
Now Elsa blushed. "Only for another year," she said. "Well, a year and a half."
"Sure, a year and a half together doesn't sound long at all," Anna said. "But how long does a year and a half apart sound?"
Elsa nodded, acknowledging the point. "Way too long."
xxxxxxx
Tuesday saw them attending a matinee. The theater was pretty empty, due to how early they arrived – or maybe it was because of the movie they picked.
Elsa blamed herself. After a Bollywood movie and a romance movie, she'd thought a romantic comedy might be a bit more subdued. Well, it certainly was.
Love…and other Fairytales starred Ashton Kutcher as your standard, everyday protagonist, who, through some crazy hijinks, ends up living in an apartment with a girl he absolutely can't stand, except she might actually be the love of his life. It was….well, it was awful. A total snoozefest with predictable jokes and a story structure you could set your watch to. At forty-five minutes in, Elsa wanted to jump up and shout "Just fuck already!" She doubted it would disrupt any of the other people's viewing experiences, though it might disrupt their naps.
She and Anna munched from the same popcorn bucket, paying just enough attention to not end up holding hands by accident. Every time a groaner of a joke played out, they would look at each other and make a face. Elsa had already whispered an apology for not looking into the quality of the movie before suggesting it, which Anna had of course dismissed. Indeed, while the movie was awful, neither of them were having a bad time. A bad movie with a good friend could still be a good time.
90 minutes later, they exited the theater, still snacking on the overly large bucket of popcorn.
"Well that was…a travesty," Elsa said.
Anna nodded. "I've seen worse movies with Ashton Kutcher, but that's not exactly a high bar."
"I mean, the story was just so awful! Nothing about it was funny. Remember that scene where he runs into her when she's in a bathrobe and he's like, 'Bwuuuh?'"
"It wasn't even that revealing," Anna pointed out.
"Yeah, that's another thing," Elsa said. "They didn't do much with that R rating, did they? I mean, if you're gonna make an awful movie, you might as well have the characters fuck at the end, to reward your audience for sitting through it."
"Or here's an idea," Anna said. "How about you make a good movie, and have sex scenes?"
"Now that's a great concept!" Elsa said. "They oughta hire more people like you."
Yeah," Anna responded, assuming a fake haughtiness. "Sadly, there's just not enough me to go around."
"No, there isn't," Elsa agreed.
She and Anna were both holding onto the popcorn bucket. If you ignored that 10 inch cylinder of paper, it was almost like they were holding hands. But that wouldn't be sisterly – at least, it wouldn't feel sisterly.
Easy, Elsa, easy. You're halfway there. This was your idea, the least you can do is not fuck it up.
Her body was starting to ache for Anna. She'd known, from the moment she'd suggested this week long break, that she'd come to regret it before it was over. But she knew this was the responsible thing to do, whether she liked it or not. Scratch that – the fact she didn't like it was part of what made it the responsible thing.
"Elsa?" Anna said, breaking her concentration. "You okay?"
Elsa shook herself. "Yeah, sorry. I guess I spaced out there, huh?" Anna nodded. "I was just thinking about how much responsibility sucks."
Anna nodded, seeming to understand exactly what she meant. "Yeah, it does. But you're doing a good job of it so far."
Elsa smiled ruefully. "If you could read my mind, you might not say that."
Anna laughed. "If I could read your mind, Elsa, this all would've been resolved weeks ago!"
"You've got a point there," Elsa said with a chuckle.
Anna elbowed her. "If you need any help to cool things down, I could always drop some eggs onto your head again."
"Oh my god, I forgot you did that!" Elsa said, laughing. "You used to be such a little brat, didn't you?"
"Used to?" Anna responded playfully.
"Hmm, was that the same year you got in trouble for digging up mom's garden?" Elsa asked.
"No, that was the year I got stuck in that big tree and you had to call the fire department," Anna answered.
"Oh yeah," Elsa said. "Good times."
And so they shared a good laugh, and reminisced about a simpler time when sisters were all they thought they'd ever be.
xxxxxxx
Elsa hefted the mini-fridge onto the dolly, earning impressed stares from the other two women present.
"Geez, Elsa, we could've helped with that," Anna said.
"Or emptied it first," Tiana added.
Elsa opened the fridge and noticed the half-case of soda inside. "Thought I felt something sliding around in there," she said, shrugging.
Anna's jaw slacked, then snapped shut when she realized Tiana probably shouldn't catch her drooling over her sister.
"I'll take this out to your truck, okay?" Elsa said.
"You gonna want a hand with that?" Tiana asked.
"Nah, I don't think so," Elsa answered.
"All right, then," Tiana said. "Thanks."
"No problem," Elsa said as she wheeled the fridge out of the now mostly empty dorm room. The other two girls resumed putting the remaining stuff into cardboard boxes.
"It's nice to finally meet you," Anna said to her sister's roommate.
"Same," Tiana replied. "Elsa's told me so much about you."
"I'll bet," Anna said, trying to sound as if there were only innocent ways to interpret that statement. She started unloading the clothes from Elsa's dresser, deliberately skipping past the underwear drawer.
"She says you're like a supergenius Einstein," Tiana said.
"Well, I don't know about that," Anna responded. "She must've exaggerated some stuff."
"I dunno," Tiana replied cryptically.
Elsa returned shortly thereafter. "Okay, it's loaded up," she said.
"Thanks," Tiana said. "Seriously, thanks so much for your help."
"You're welcome," Elsa said. "Just think of it as payment for being such a good roommate."
Tiana chuckled. "Sure, but then how am I gonna pay you back for being the same thing?"
"Oh, you'll think of something," Elsa said. "Hey, I don't know when we get to choose our dorm rooms next year, but do you want to try and end up in the same room again?"
"Don't think we'll have much choice in the matter," Tiana said. "I heard they're not gonna let people pick next year, they're just gonna go alphabetically."
Elsa frowned. "That's dumb," she said.
Tiana shrugged. "Something about too many couples shackin' up in the same rooms. Bet it won't last more than a year."
"I guess," Elsa said, still clearly disappointed.
Soon, everything was in boxes, all carted out to their vehicles. As Anna carried the last box away, Elsa gave Tiana a hug. "Have a good summer, Tiana. You've been a great roommate."
"You too, Elsa," Tiana said. "You and your sister have fun, you hear?"
"Oh, we will," Elsa said. "We've got big plans."
Tiana smiled. Almost smirked, actually.
"Well, plans, anyway," Elsa backpedaled, slightly unnerved by Tiana's expression. "Nothing too crazy."
Tiana nodded. "I bet you'll have fun," she said. "She seems every bit as amazing as you've been telling me she is."
Elsa tried to keep her cool and did a very bad job of it. "Just to be clear-"
Tiana held up a hand. "I said it before, I'll say it again," Tiana said, her face warm and sympathetic. "You do you."
Then she walked away, and Elsa, surprising herself, didn't panic.
xxxxxxx
Thursday rolled around, and Anna was vibrating with energy.
In addition to her morning jog, she'd taken a few jogs around the block today. Now, at 7 in the evening, she was still just as restless. Sitting in her room doing nothing wasn't going to change anything, either.
She'd been killing time browsing on the internet, but that was getting her nowhere. She knew exactly what she needed to do. She opened the incognito mode on her browser and prepared to…pregame.
It was funny, the number of different euphemisms the normally blunt Elsa could come up with for the same thing. First homework, now this.
When Elsa had first broached the subject that week, Anna had assured her that she would abstain. She wanted to save her energy for their experience together. Elsa, honored but also slightly amused, had informed her that if she wanted said experience to last more than a couple minutes, it would behoove her to pregame at least once. And now, Anna could tell, was the time for it. It only took a few seconds of searching to find a video that appealed to her, and so her right hand headed south.
She was glad she had fought past her embarrassment to ask Elsa a few questions. She'd been liberal with her self-gratification at first, but once she officially started dating Elsa, she'd held herself back a lot more. In retrospect, that was probably why she'd gotten so impatient while Elsa had managed to cool her jets. Elsa had been quick to rectify her attitude.
"Masturbation isn't something you stop doing once you have a girlfriend," she'd explained. "Unless the two of you are so in sync, you have the exact same desires at the exact same time."
Anna had nodded. "That would be impossible, even if we were identical twins."
"It wouldn't be possible even if we were conjoined twins," Elsa had added.
Anna's orgasm was short and sweet. The video hadn't even played for three minutes. It seemed Elsa had a point. She wiped her hand dry and closed the browser, them prepared to take a shower.
She immediately felt the relief the action had provided her. Her desires, while not sated, were now chamfered. Her relentless energy had faded somewhat, and she felt much more confident that she'd manage to get to sleep tonight. Elsa, once again, was right on the money – pregaming, it seemed, did worlds of good.
Yet as she headed to the bathroom, she made an executive decision: This would be the last pregaming she did this week. Not because she'd feel guilty about it, but because she really did want to let her energy build up for Saturday night.
The next hands to touch me will be Elsa's.
She undressed, stepped into the shower, and grabbed the bar of soap.
Well…I know what I mean.
xxxxxxx
A hundred years later, Friday came. A hundred years after that came Friday night.
Dinner was another Elsa specialty, grilled cheese with turkey and bacon. Anna set the table, and Elsa poured the drinks. They contained no secret ingredients, only the not-so-secret one.
"This is delicious," Anna said, covering her mouth so she could continue to chew whole speaking.
"Thanks," Elsa said.
After a short while, the food was done, and the dishes were promptly moved to the dishwasher. Anna recognized the telltale look of an Elsa with something to say, but she waited for Elsa to say it of her own volition.
"So," Elsa said after a time. "How's your week been?"
Anna smiled. "It's been good," she said. "How about yours?"
"Very good," Elsa said. "As good as I could've hoped for."
"I'm glad to hear that," Anna said.
They didn't say any more clarifiers on the matter, because they didn't need to. They had made it through a whole week of totally platonic hanging out. Though her mind may have gone to naughtier places sometimes, all of Elsa's actions has only been sisterly. And it felt just fine. There was no uncomfortable undercurrent at all, no feeling that something vital was missing.
"In fact," Anna added, "I think I wouldn't mind having more weeks like that in the future."
Elsa's heart swelled. That was the best thing she could've said. "Me too," she said.
Anna's smile became a sly grin. "Just not next week, of course."
"Of course," Elsa said, agreeing vehemently.
xxxxxxx
24 hours. That was all that was left.
Elsa climbed into her bed, but she knew she wouldn't be able to get to sleep for another couple of hours. In her head, she still anxiously prepared for what might possibly go wrong between now and then, but that was just a tiny voice in her head, one she could now easily shut out. The worst thing that could've happened already had, and now, one week later, they were fully past it. She and Anna had both proven themselves capable of the restraint necessary to not completely ruin their relationship just about as well as anyone could. And she'd only needed to pregame twice to do it – way below her weekly average.
Oh yeah, wasn't there something I said I'd do?
Suddenly remembering, she threw off the covers and walked over to her desk. She opened the bottom right drawer, shifted aside the various junk inside, and pulled out the small white cylinder concealed in the back corner.
A chill ran down her spine as she turned the bottle in her hands. She held it up and read the information on the label for the first time since she'd acquired it.
20 mg
Take once daily for treatment of depression
Refills left: 0
Prescribed by Dr. G. Pabolo
Use before 4/25/2020
DO NOT take with alcohol
She chuckled. "Heh. So even if I had wanted to that night, I couldn't have."
She had only really considered taking them once after Esme's warming, but it still spooked her that she had even come that close. Just a week ago, her paranoia had taken her that close to making what might've been an irreversible choice. Even before then, it had always been at the back of her mind, a last resort option if things didn't work out. But they had.
She held the bottle up in her palm. "Sorry, doc," she said, addressing the bottle as if it were the doctor himself. "Your advice helped a lot, it really did." She closed her hand around the bottle. "But I choose option four."
She dropped the bottle into her desk-side trash can. It bounced slightly off one of the crumpled up pages that had once been her diff EQ notes, then landed and sank. Elsa gave the can a soft kick, and the bottle slid down into the sea of paper, out of sight.
The deed done, Elsa felt a hefty burden lift off her shoulders, as if the bottle had weighed a hundred pounds. She walked back through the darkened room to her bed and fell back into it.
It was a nice bed, for sure – certainly better than her dorm bed. But starting tomorrow, it would be too small for her purposes.
Sorry, bed. But tomorrow night, I'll be in Anna's.