A/N :Finally I know! the long awaited chapter!

We're just so busy lately and things take time, and we're so invested in doing this topic justice, It takes time to do it right, and we have to convince ourselves it's done or we'll never stop editing. We have up to chapter 20 written, but unedited, just so you know we aren't just making it up as we go along. I spend so many hours re reading and re writing and doing research to make sure that the topics are mostly factual. It is fiction so I do allow a little leeway while still remaining within the lines of the truth and law. Not sure when the next chapter will be up but please know it will come!

Chapter 12

A Change is Gonna Come

As predicted, Addison had to drag the grumpy teenager out of bed the next morning. Lucky for Jo and Megan, they were allowed to stay and sleep in since Derek would be home in the study. Considering this was only a quick follow up appointment, Amelia would be back to her friends in no time. In all honesty, they'd probably sleep through her entire absence.

Outside of a sleepy whine and her permanent grumpy pout, the girl hadn't argued much before slowly heading to the shower; much to Addison's relief.

Relief was short lived however, as Addison quickly learned that getting the teen out of the house and into the car would be the real challenge of the day.

Despite leaving later than planned, Addison wasn't angry. It hadn't been Amelia's fault that her stomach had been upset again that morning. The teen had thrown up almost immediately after finishing her shower, and she had cried in her sister's arms, half because of nerves and uncertainty about the appointment and half because she didn't feel any better after being sick.

Ultimately, they somehow made it to the car and silently made their way to the hospital. Amelia was curled up in a blanket Addison had wrapped her in and appeared to be asleep, her ghostly pale face resting against the passenger window.

Maybe it was time to talk to a nutritionist, Addison thought as she watched the girl sit on the exam table waiting for the doctor to show up with their test results.

Amelia's body started shaking with nerves as soon as Dr. Carlsmith entered the exam room.

"Amelia, Addison, nice to see you two again. Amelia, I have your test results here, but before we start I want to remind you that you are my patient and whatever we discuss here is privileged and confidential. It is absolutely understandable if you'd prefer to speak privately, and the same is true for your sister-in-law." Dr. Carlsmith paused, noting again how frail and sick the teenager looked. Although she now had the answers and could confirm the girl wasn't facing anything life threatening, she also knew any relief would be short lived once she shared her findings.

The doctor waited patiently while her patients considered her words. The statement had been directed more so at the teen, but she had worded it to include both of them so Amelia wouldn't feel singled out.

"I want Addison to stay please." The teen decided, responding in a quiet voice as she stared intently at the tiled floor in front of her. She had understood that the statement the doctor made had been for her benefit and not Addison's.

"What's happening? Am I dying? Do I have some disease?" Amelia rambled quickly, her voice cracking with emotion. The older woman smiled gently, wishing she didn't have to break news like this to her young patient.

"And you're sure you want Addison to stay?" The young girl nodded, gripping her Addison's hand tightly, unwilling to let her go.

The end of the appointment and the trip back home had been a blur, and Amelia recalled very little about how she got here. She recognized that was now sitting on the couch in Addison and Derek's living room, but she still felt like she was in a trance, and clearing the cobwebs was proving to be difficult. She curled in on herself protectively, hugging her knees tighter to her chest and resting her tear stricken cheek atop them. Her eyes were glued to the carpet, but she was well aware that her brother and sister-in-law were staring at her.

She couldn't bear to face them after she had ruined everything once again. She figured it was only a matter of hours until her social worker showed up and took her away from her family, placing her in foster care once and for all. All she wanted was a hug from her mom right now.

"What's wrong? What happened today?" Derek demanded, alarmed by the state his sister was in.

"Addison, what happened today? Are you both okay?" He repeated at a higher volume, blurting out his questions without taking a breath.

"We are okay, Derek. Everything came back clean and there is nothing to worry about healthwise for either of us." Addison reassured, noticing her husband relax ever so slightly.

"However, we did find out why Amelia has been so sick, and you need to be patient and listen while we explain it to you." She instructed firmly, turning to Amelia and giving her small nod of encouragement.

"Amelia, I know you're scared, but you need to tell your brother what we found out today. We won't be able to hide this from him, and he needs to know so we can all talk about it." Addison encouraged the teen who finally looked up at her with watery eyes and a vacant expression.

"Amelia." She pushed once again. It wasn't her news to share, she felt strongly that it should come from Amelia directly.

Amelia opened her mouth to speak but instead of words, gut wrenching sobs erupted from deep inside of her. She hides her face in her hands, shaking her head 'no' over and over.

Addison sighed, deciding against comforting her in that moment, focusing instead on the realization that she had to be the one to break this news.

"Well, the good news is nothing is life threatening. All STD panels came back clean, as well as all blood work testing organ function and abnormalities." She explained, easing Derek's most obvious concerns before pausing.

She reached out to grab her husband's hand and looked him straight in the eye before continuing.

"She's sober and she is healthy, Derek, and that is what is most important. But Amelia needs us now more than ever because she just found out she is pregnant; roughly thirteen weeks." Addison finally shared, squeezing his hand tightly and holding his gaze, praying he would stay calm for Amelia's sake.

Derek's mouth dropped open, the color draining from his face as Addison handed him a sonogram photo.

"You're kidding me right? This is a prank?" Derek rambled, running a shaky hand through his thick hair as he swiveled his head back and forth from his sister to his wife, praying it wasn't true.

Amelia had curled up into an even smaller ball and was gasping for breath between strangled sobs.

Addison squeezed his hand again in confirmation, her expression serious and unwavering.

As he absorbed his wife's serious expression and his sister's lack of denial, Derek was assaulted with a confusing and overwhelming range of emotions towards his sister. He was terrified for her, guilty that no one in the family had bothered to educate her about safe sex, devastated by the premature loss of her innocence, and he was angry. He was so furious at the world, at himself, and at his family for the way they had failed her, that he couldn't think straight. Before he could stop himself he was screaming at her.

"How could you be so irresponsible?! Do you even understand the consequences of your actions? Goddamnit Amy, do you even think?" He roared, directing all of his anger at her as was the Shepherd way.

As just a small child, Amelia had been devastated and severely traumatized after witnessing the death of their father. Derek had been her rock in the immediate years following, but their sisters had struggled to bear the crushing weight of her pain on top of their own, and they had distanced themselves from her. He hadn't meant to, but as time went on he learned to cope, and just like his sisters he had begun to resent Amelia's inability to adjust with him.

"Derek!" Addison reprimanded, abruptly cutting off his tirade. "That's enough." She commanded icily. A learned trait from Bizzy she supposed.

"She is terrified enough as it is. Berating her for the past doesn't help us now, nor does it change the reality of the situation." She sighed, rubbing her temples. It was going to be a long day.

"Amelia, go to your room." The redhead demanded firmly, using the same no-nonsense tone she had used with Derek.

Amelia flinched.

Addison swallowed, the knot in her stomach growing more painful as she struggled to balance her own emotions.

"Please." She added in a much gentler tone, acknowledging she had been harsher than intended.

With a face full of tears, and broken sobs still escaping from her mouth, the teen fled the room and up straight for her bedroom.

Amelia leaned heavily on her closed bedroom door, gasping for air as she tried to swallow her sobs and control her labored breathing.

She felt anxious and terrified, like her skin was crawling and her whole world was caving in around her.

The instinct to run, which she had buried deep inside and tried to forget, was back with a vengeance.

She was on autopilot as she grabbed her suitcase, stuffing it full of whatever clothes and possessions she could reach in her panicked haze. Suddenly she froze, staring at the contents of her now open jewelry box, splayed out on her bedspread. The necklace her mom had given her on her birthday captivated her, glittering in the afternoon light streaming from the window.

A small gasp escaped her lips as she reached a trembling hand out to grasp the delicate chain. She closed her fist around the precious item, holding it to her chest protectively as she slid to the floor beside her bed.

The tears don't stop falling but her sobs no longer make a sound. She no longer had the energy to run away, she no longer had the strength to wail.

She knew this was another crucial turning point in her life. She had done this before. After she watched her father die, her 'home' was never the same, never the comfort it had once been. She had gambled her life away with a fall into drug addiction and self destruction, and as a result she no longer lived at home with her mother. How ironic that she started using drugs to cope with feeling unwanted by her mom, only to find in the end that she had been the one to force them apart. Her thumb stroked the necklace in her palm, the metal slick with her tears.

Whatever came next she didn't know. Where do teen moms in the system go? She wondered if it would be a foster home, or maybe a group home where other problem teens in this situation went.

Her stomach turned with familiar nausea and she swallowed hard, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath. She lowered the hand with the necklace, relaxing her fist and pressing a shaky palm to her belly. It felt like three generations in a way; her hand, the necklace, her baby.

She felt a jolt of unexpected anxiety at the prospect of what was to come. Would her new home placement be willing to take in both of them? Would Social Services even allow her to keep her baby?

She could understand why they might have their doubts about her ability to care for a child. She could barely take care of herself on her own yet, how could they trust her with a helpless baby?

She felt small and scared, just like she had in that store all those years ago after those bad men had taken her daddy away. All she wanted was her mommy to hold her.

Amelia couldn't be sure how long she had been curled up on her bedroom floor, but the darkened bedroom made clear that night had fallen.

Her head snapped up violently in trepidation as she heard her door open. Her eyes filled with tears again as feelings of hurt, anger and betrayal coursed through her at the sight of her sister in law.

Addison was the one person in her life that she thought she could count on to always be on her side, and make her feel safe. She had never raised her voice at her in the four years she had known her, but tonight when Amelia had needed her the most, Addison had yelled at her. Her brother had yelled at her first, and Addison had seemed to side with him over her.

"Can we talk?" The woman asked softly, sitting down on the bed and noting the suitcase but deciding not to say anything.

"I want my mom." The teen whimpered, totally spent, overstimulated and overwhelmed. She had reached a breaking point, reverting back to a young girl.

"I know I'm going to be sent away, so before I am I want to see her one last time and tell her it's not her fault that I'm such a screw up." Amelia rambled, crying heavily and refusing to meet her sister in law's eyes. "Can I do that before my social worker comes to get me? I know I can't stay here anymore."

"I - Amelia, what on earth are you talking about? Why would you think you were getting kicked out? I promised you I would never allow that to happen and I meant that. Nobody is going to call your social worker, and you are not going anywhere." Addison reassured with firm resolve, kneeling on the floor beside the girl who refused to look at her.

"What is it that you really want, Amy? What do you need right now?" Addison asked softly, watching sadly as tears dropped from the teenagers cheeks and darkened the fabric of her jeans.

"I just want my mommy." Amelia gasped, her words broken by another heartbreaking sob.

She felt completely stripped down and lost, like a confused little girl once again. Much like the five year old all those years ago in that general store, the only thing she could focus on in the fog of fear and emotional pain was the instinct to be protected by her mother.

"I miss her, and I didn't think I would when I first moved in here, before everything, be-before it was no longer my ch-choice." She hiccuped, chest heaving and nose running. She wiped her face roughly with her sleeve and opened her fist to look down at her precious necklace once again.

"I h-haven't seen her since my b-birthday and she said she'd try to-to be around more. Why'd she leave me, Addie? Why doesn't she w-want me?" She pleaded, a guttural wail cutting through the air and making Addison flinch involuntarily.

Addison reached forward quickly, grabbing Amelia under her arms and lifting the girl into her lap like she would pick up a small child. She cradled her close to her chest, kissing the crown of her head and murmuring words of comfort while she let her cry it all out.

After a few minutes had passed, Amelia's sobs had faded to silent tears.

"Okay honey, let's go see your mom. This is hard and confusing, and sometimes a girl just needs her mom. I promise you, your mom wants to see you just as much." Addison said softly but confidently, lifting Amelia's chin to meet her eyes.

"Let's get you cleaned up and fed, and then we'll take a little road trip to Westchester." She added, relieved to see a small nod of agreement from the girl in her arms.

End Chapter

Song title: A Change is Gonna Come-Sam Cooke