It had taken a while for Sarah Alder to get used to being biddiless, she held a loneliness more painful than ever before. Tally had once said that they would take her burden and yet here she was and she felt like her burden weighed her down even more. When you don't have seven people connected to you to help carry that weight, it can be debilitating.
But here she was back in this cold cruel world, thrown out from the comfortable warmth of mother mycelium. But her fight wasn't finished, that much was true. But in the precious calm before the storm there was Tally.
Tally who wouldn't leave her side. Tally who cried in her arms. Tally who could never say sorry enough no matter how many times Alder said she forgave her. Tally who was like the sun, shining some light over the darkest reaches of Alder's very existence. Tally who reminded her she was human. Tally who sought the truth. Tally who sought her.
Always Tally. Tally. Tally. Tally.
When did their relationship change? When did a simple you and I become a we, an us?
Those eyes that looked at her with so much reverence and care, the regret behind them that the red head tried to come to terms with.
How rare it was for a witch to become sick, the younger witch lay there sweating as her body tried to fight the sickness. Alder sat at her side, refreshing the damp washcloth as it lost its coolness.
Alder ached at the girl crying in her sleep for her mother and oftentimes for her and the brunette would reassure her that she was there. But it pained her to see her like this, Raelle and the others had gone for supplies and it usually took a few days for them to return.
If only there was something she could do, to take this sickness from the girl, she would carry it for her if it meant she wasn't suffering. Like how Tally had once carried her years she wished to carry her sickness.
So she held her hand tightly and concentrated until she felt it, a spark, a coolness spreading from her into Tally and the young girl seemed to ease. Her knitted brows smoothing out as the sickness left her.
The warmth surrounding her was quickly forgotten as soon as she saw those eyes open and the younger witch smiled up at her. Removing the wet washcloth, Alder bent down and pressed a kiss to her forehead like she was porcelain.
"You should continue to rest, I'll be right here."
Tally reached for her hand bringing it to her lips and kissing it like she had just received a blessing, "Will you stay with me?"
"Always, I'll never leave you."
As her eyes grew heavy again she smiled back, "Promise?"
"I promise."
And as Tally fell back asleep desperately holding her hand in hers, Alder sat once more at her side, falling asleep with her head on her stomach.
When next she woke her head felt heavy and foggy but she felt fingers brushing at her hair. Sitting up she was met with that bright eyed look she'd been missing for days, "Hello," Alder rasped out with a suddenly sore throat.
Tally just smiled, "Hi."
"How are you feeling?" Alder stood and placed a hand on her forehead.
"Much better, thank you, it's like I was never sick to begin with."
Grabbing the bowl holding the washcloth by the bed, Alder smiled, "Good, don't push yourself. I managed to take your sickness from you and that's a first for me so don't push your luck, cadet," the word fell from her lips teasingly.
Tally merely smirked and spoke out a similarly teasing, "Yes, ma'am."
Alder would find her later on standing in the tall waves of wheat growing outside their doors. Brushing her hands over the rushes, a smile on her face as she enjoyed the last of the warm sun. The last day of summer and then it'd be the autumn equinox, Mabon, the first harvest.
It made Alder feel so nostalgic and wanton, she imagined for just a second what it'd be like to take her right there as she made love to her in that very field. To be allowed to be selfish and greedy with her wants, to hear moans fall from Tally's mouth, to hear her say her name in the throes of pleasure like she was praying to a goddess for absolution.
She suddenly felt too hot, the not good uncomfortable type of hot. Weakness overcame her and she tried to yell out to Tally but no words could come. She slunk to her knees, her hand trying to hold onto the doorway to support her other bracing against the would floor.
She heard the muffled screams of her name in the distance, looking to see the redhead running towards her with worry on her face.
Please don't look so sad.
She felt the force of Tally's body crashing into her, her head too heavy as her chin rested on her shoulder.
"Sarah, you're such a noble idiot, how could you do this? You haven't been sick in years, we don't know how your body is going to handle this," Tally strained to drag her to her feet, taking the woman's weight onto her.
Alder couldn't find the words as it took all of her strength to help Tally get her to the bed, how had she known that she had taken her illness onto herself?
Knowers gonna know.
The moment her head hit the pillow the sweet release of sleep pulled her under. Had she wished for a dream filled sleep it'd be of Tally. But she was plagued by nightmares, her sister hanging, her coven burning, the blood on her hands, and Tally with that sad look on her face.
Tally wasn't sure what she was supposed to do, Raelle and the others hadn't come back yet and now Sarah was carrying her sickness. Hair down, face pale, a sweat glistening brow and the sad pleas in her sleep and it broke Tally's heart. She had no doubt that Sarah had felt the same as she was laying in that very bed not too long ago.
She settled the same damp washcloth used for her forehead earlier on Sarah's forehead, a hand reaching up to grasp at her wrist. Looking down she was met with eyes unknowing, "Sarah?"
"Tally?" Sarah tried to sit up but doubled over in pain at cramps in her stomach, her hand fisting in the sheets, panting out for Tally, "Tally, I'm so sorry, please forgive me."
Tears came to Tally's eyes as she watched the woman curl in on herself, hands clutching at her head, the sound of hale starting to pelt the rooftop startling her from the image in front of her.
"Sarah, it's okay, I forgive you. Just rest, please," Tally tried to get her to lay back down and she never thought she'd ever see the Sarah Alder so completely vulnerable and weak.
The hale died down as Sarah just stared at the ceiling, some semblance of thinking clearly in her gaze, "It haunts me, there's so much blood on my hands, Tally."
"I know and you are forgiven, now please, you need to rest," Tally fought the need to break down sobbing so she could remain strong for the woman breaking apart in front of her.
Sarah managed to sleep but it only seemed to get worse from there, Tally tried to feed her some broth but she only spit it back up. And while she had been gone for just a minute she came back to the older woman clawing at her chest, nails covered with blood and bloody scratches marring the skin over her heart. As if she was trying to claw her heart out, like the weight of her soul was too much to bear.
Tally hated doing it but she had to tie her hands to the bed to prevent her from hurting herself again, she wasn't great at fixing but she could at least heal the wounds on her chest. Kissing the flesh as soon as it was healed, she only wished there was more she could do for her.
At one point when Tally tried to get some rest she awoke to an empty bed, Sarah somehow managed to break from her restraints and she found her outside in the pouring rain.
"Sarah, what are you doing!? Please come inside," Tally tried to get her to budge but she was firmly rooted to the spot.
"I just wanted it to wash it all away, all the blood," Sarah looked at her hands like the blood would never come off.
Tally grabbed her by the shoulders and made her look at her, "There's no more blood. Now please, you're going to make it worse."
Sarah just stared at her, "Are you going to abandon me too?"
"Never."
The older woman choked out a sob reaching her hand out to cup her cheek, "Promise?"
"I promise."
The rain began to calm and Sarah nodded and let Tally wrap an arm around her as she let her back into the house.
From there she was calmer, too calm, so much weaker and Tally feared for her life. She had no idea why it was taking everyone so long to come back.
Brushing her hair back Tally pressed a kiss to her forehead as tears fell from her eyes, "Please, don't leave me, you promised. I only just got you back, I don't want to lose you again. You're stronger than this, you are storm and fury!"
Tally cried herself to sleep with her head resting on the woman's chest listening to the sounds of her weakened heart beat. A heart she wished would beat just for her.
In the morning Tally woke to Sarah sleeping soundly, her fever broken but sleeping to regain her strength. Tally sighed in relief, bringing her weathered hand to her lips and kissing it. She cleaned her up the best she could and went to make something light for her to eat for when she woke.
Alder had found some form of strength and found her feet taking her towards some humming in the kitchen and she found Tally tired but happy as she cooked over the stove.
"I could get used to this."
Tally startled from her voice and turned to look at her with worried eyes, "You should still be resting, you haven't fully recovered."
"When I woke you weren't there and I realized I couldn't bear a day without you by my side," Alder made her way over on sore legs and Tally met her half way, "I want a home where I can hear you hum just like that, happy, a home filled with everything that is us. When this fight is over, will you have me?"
Happy tears filled Tally's eyes as she looked at her with the same pride and happiness as that first day at Fort Salem and hearing her give her speech that moved her to tears.
"Yes, I already decided a long time ago that home is where you are," Alder let out a sigh of relief and Tally caught her as her legs almost gave out from weakness, "Now will you please go back and lay down while I bring you something to eat?"
"Will you eat with me? You need your strength too, you've been taking care of me."
Tally helped her to the bed, covering her with the blanket, "Yes, but next time don't be the hero, I would've gotten over it."
"Yes, but if there was something I could do I would rather do it then watch you suffer," Alder looked at her with a finality in her eyes.
Tally didn't hesitate, she leaned down and kissed her on the lips, gentle but filled with all her love for the older woman.
"But it hurts me too, to watch you suffer," Tally placed a hand over her heart where she had scratched herself before, "How about we try communicating properly for once, hmm?"
"Oh, you mean you won't be barging in on me demanding answers anymore?"
Tally blushed, "I promise to communicate properly too. Now, let me go get you food before you pass out from an empty stomach."
They ate hot stew and Tally blushingly managed to get the both of them into the bath to clean off the past few days. Teeth brushed and dressed in a fresh pair of clothes, they slowly danced to the civilian music that Alder enjoyed immensely.
Then on shaky legs they made their way to bed made with fresh sheets, no more signs of illness. Facing each other, Alder smirked and Tally giggled, "What?"
"When I watched you out in the field the other day I imagined having my way with you."
Tally blushed, "Well, you better get your strength back soon then, you're going to need it."
Alder brought her into a kiss, "Oh, I have no doubt, just take it easy on an old lady."
Tally stretched over so she could lay chest to chest, "But you're the Sarah Alder, you bring storm and fury."
Threading their fingers together the older woman reached up and kissed her, "Well, then I better deliver."
"Promise?"
With one last kiss before falling asleep in each other's arms she smiled back, "I promise."