Disclaimer: Bella's Journal consists of real songs, none of which belong to me. I do edit the songs slightly, mostly so they work with the story better.
Bella's Journal continued
Sparks Fly
The way you move is like a full on rainstorm
And I'm a house of cards
You're the kind of reckless that should send me running
But I kinda know that I won't get far
And you stood there in front of me just
Close enough to touch
Close enough to hope you couldn't see
What I was thinking of
Drop everything now
Meet me in the pouring rain
Kiss me on the sidewalk
Take away the pain
'Cause I see, sparks fly, whenever you smile
Get me with those gold eyes, baby
As the lights go down
Gimme something that'll haunt me whenever you're not around
'Cause I see, sparks fly, when you smile
My mind forgets to remind me, we're a bad idea
You touch me once and it's really something
You find I'm even better than you, imagined I would be
I'm on my guard for the rest of the world
But with you I know its no good
And I could wait patiently
But I really wish you would
Drop everything now
Meet me in the pouring rain
Kiss me on the sidewalk
Take away the pain
'Cause I see, sparks fly, whenever you smile
Get me with those gold eyes, baby
As the lights go down
Gimme something that'll haunt me when you're not around
'Cause I see, sparks fly, whenever you smile
I run my fingers through your hair
And watch the lights go wild
Just keep on keeping your eyes on me
Its just wrong enough to make it feel right
And lead me up the staircase
Won't you whisper soft and slow
And I'm captivated by you baby
Like a fireworks show
Drop everything now
Meet me in the pouring rain
Kiss me on the sidewalk
Take away the pain
'Cause I see, sparks fly whenever you smile
Get me with those gold eyes, baby
As the lights go down
Gimme something that'll haunt me when you're not around
'Cause I see, sparks fly, whenever you smile
When sparks fly, baby smile
When sparks fly
Wonderland
Flashing lights and we
Took a wrong turn and we
Fell down a rabbit hole
You held on tight to me
'Cause nothing's as it seems
And spinning out of control
Didn't they tell us don't rush into things?
Didn't you flash your gold eyes at me?
Haven't you heard what becomes of curious minds?
Didn't it all seem new and exciting?
I felt your arms twisting around me
I should've slept with one eye open at night
We found Wonderland
You and I got lost in it
And we pretended it could last forever
We found Wonderland
You and I got lost in it
And life was never worse but never better,
in Wonderland
in Wonderland
in Wonderland
in Wonderland
So we went on our way
Too in love to think straight
All alone, or so it seemed
But there were strangers watching
And whispers turned to talking
And talking turned to screams, oh
Didn't they tell us don't rush into things?
Didn't you flash your gold eyes at me?
Didn't you call my fears with a Cheshire Cat smile?
Didn't it all seem new and exciting?
I felt your arms twisting around me
It's all fun and games 'til somebody loses their mind
Oh, darling, we found Wonderland
You and I got lost in it
And we pretended it could last forever,
We found Wonderland
You and I got lost in it
And life was never worse but never better,
in Wonderland
in Wonderland
in Wonderland
in Wonderland
You reached for me
But I was gone
You knew I had to go back home
You search the world for something else
To make you feel like what we had
And in the end, in Wonderland, we both went mad
Oh, we found Wonderland
You and I got lost in it
And we pretended it could last forever
We found Wonderland
You and I got lost in it
And life was never worse but never better
We found Wonderland
You and I got lost in it
And we pretended it
Could last forever
in Wonderland
We found Wonderland
You and I got lost in it
in Wonderland
And life was never worse but never better
In Wonderland
State of Grace
I'm walking fast through the traffic lights
Busy streets and busy lives
And all we know is touch and go
We are alone with our changing minds
We fall in love 'til it hurts or bleeds, or fades in time
And I never saw you coming
And I'll never be the same
You come around and the armor falls
Pierce the room like a cannon ball
Now all we know is don't let go
We are alone, just you and me
Up in your room and our slates are clean
Just twin fire signs,
So you were never a saint
And I love in shades of wrong
We learn to live with the pain
Mosaic broken hearts
But this love is brave and wild
And I never saw you coming
And I'll never be the same
This is a state of grace
This is the worthwhile fight
Love is a ruthless game
Unless you play it good and right
These are the hands of fate
You're my Achilles heel
This is the golden age of something good
And right and real
And I never saw you coming
And I'll never be the same
And I never saw you coming
And I'll never be the same
So you were never a saint
And I love in shades of wrong
Be the same
We learn to live with the pain
Mosaic broken hearts
But this love is brave and wild
This is a state of grace
This is the worthwhile fight
Love is a ruthless game
Unless you play it good and right
Cardigan
Vintage tee, brand new phone
High heels on cobblestones
When you are young, they assume you know nothing
Sequin smile, black lipstick
Sensual politics
When you are young, they assume you know nothing
But I knew you
Dancin' in your Levi's
Drunk under a streetlight, I
I knew you
Hand under my sweatshirt
Baby, kiss it better, I
And when I felt like I was an old cardigan
Under someone's bed
You put me on and said I was your favorite
A friend to all is a friend to none
Chase two girls, lose the one
When you are young, they assume you know nothin'
But I knew you
Playing hide-and-seek and
Giving me your weekends, I
I knew you
Your heartbeat on the High Line
Once in 20 lifetimes, I
And when I felt like I was an old cardigan
Under someone's bed
You put me on and said I was your favorite
To kiss in cars and downtown bars
Was all we needed
You drew stars around my scars
But now I'm bleedin'
'Cause I knew you
Steppin' on the last train
Marked me like a bloodstain, I
I knew you
Tried to change the ending
Peter losing Wendy, I
I knew you
Leavin' like a father
Running like water, I
And when you are young, they assume you know nothing
But I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss
I knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs
The smell of smoke would hang around this long
'Cause I knew everything when I was young
I knew I'd curse you for the longest time
Chasin' shadows in the grocery line
I knew you'd miss me once the thrill expired
And you'd be standin' in my front porch light
And I knew you'd come back to me
You'd come back to me
And you'd come back to me
And you'd come back
And when I felt like I was an old cardigan
Under someone's bed
You put me on and said I was your favorite
Call It What You Want
My castle crumbled overnight
I brought a knife to a gunfight
They took the crown, but it's alright
All the liars are calling me one
Nobody's heard from me for months
I'm doing better than I ever was, 'cause
My baby's fit like a daydream
Walking with his head down
I'm the one he's walking to
So call it what you want, yeah, call it what you want to
My baby's fly like a jet stream
High above the whole scene
Loves me like I'm brand new
So call it what you want, yeah, call it what you want to
All my flowers grew back as thorns
Windows boarded up after the storm
He built a fire just to keep me warm
All the drama queens taking swings
All the jokers dressin' up as kings
They fade to nothing when I look at him
And I know I make the same mistakes every time
Bridges burn, I never learn, at least I did one thing right
I did one thing right
I'm laughing with my lover, making forts under covers
Trust him like a brother, yeah, you know I did one thing right
Starry eyes sparkin' up my darkest night
My baby's fit like a daydream
Walking with his head down
I'm the one he's walking to
So call it what you want, yeah, call it what you want to
My baby's fly like a jet stream
High above the whole scene
Loves me like I'm brand new
(Call it what you want, call it what you want, call it)
So call it what you want, yeah, call it what you want to
I want to wear his initial
On a chain round my neck, chain round my neck*
Not because he owns me
But 'cause he really knows me
Which is more than they can say, I
I recall late April, holding my breath
Slowly I said, "You don't need to save me
But would you run away with me?"
Yes
My baby's fit like a daydream
Walking with his head down
I'm the one he's walking to
So call it what you want, yeah, call it what you want to
My baby's fly like a jet stream
High above the whole scene
Loves me like I'm brand new
So call it what you want, yeah, call it what you want to
Call it what you want, yeah
Call it what you want
To
*Edward, I know you'll read this but don't buy me a chain with your initial. Love, B
Long Live
I said remember this moment
In the back of my mind
The time we stood with our shaking hands
The crowds went wild
We were the kings and the queens
And they read off our names
The night you danced like you knew our lives
Would never be the same
You held your head like a hero
On a history book page
It was the end of a decade
But the start of an age
Long live the walls we crashed through
All the kingdom lights shined just for me and you
I was screaming, "long live all the magic we made"
And bring on all the pretenders
One day you will be remembered
I said remember this feeling
I passed the pictures around
Of all the years that we stood there on the sidelines
Wishing for right now
We are the kings and the queens
When they gave us our trophies
And we held them up for our town
And the cynics were outraged
Screaming, "this is absurd"
'Cause for a moment a thief in ripped up jeans got to rule the world
Long live the walls we crashed through
All the kingdom lights shined just for me and you
I was screaming, "long live all the magic we made"
And bring on all the pretenders
I'm not afraid
Long live all the mountains we moved
I had the time of my life
Fighting dragons with you
I was screaming, "long live the look on your face"
And bring on all the pretenders
One day you will be remembered
Hold on to spinning around
Confetti falls to the ground
May these memories break our fall
Can you take a moment
Promise me this:
That you'll stand by me forever
But if God forbid fate should step in
And force us into a goodbye
When they point to the pictures
Please tell them my name
Tell them how the crowds went wild
Tell them how I hope you shine
Long live the walls we crashed through
I had the time of my life with you
Long, long live the walls we crashed through
All the kingdom lights shined just for me and you
And I was screaming, "long live all the magic we made"
And bring on all the pretenders
I'm not afraid
Singing long live all the mountains we moved
I had the time of my life
Fighting dragons with you
And long, long live the look on your face
And bring on all the pretenders
One day, you will be remembered
Last Kiss
I still remember the look on your face
Lit through the darkness at 1:58
The words that you whispered for just us to know
You told me you loved me
So why would I go away?
Away
I do recall now the smell of the rain
Fresh on the pavement, I ran off the plane
That May 9th, the beat of my heart
It jumps through my shirt
I can still feel your arms
But now I'll go
Sit on the floor wearing your clothes
All that I know is I don't know
I never thought we'd have a last kiss
Never imagined we'd end like this
Your name, forever the name on my lips
I do remember the swing of your step
The life of the party, you're showing off again
And I roll my eyes and then you'd pull me in
I'm not much for dancing but for you I did
Because I love your handshake, meeting my father
I love how you walk with your hands in your pockets
How you'd kiss me when I was in the middle of saying something
There's not a day I won't miss those rude interruptions
And I'll go
Sit on the floor wearing your clothes
All that I know is I don't know
Never thought we'd have a last kiss
Never imagined we'd end like this
Your name, forever the name on my lips
So I'll watch your life in pictures like you used to watch me sleep
And I'll feel you forget me like I used to feel you breathe
And if I could I'd keep up with our old friends just to ask them how you are
Hope it's nice where you are
And I hope the sun shines and it's a beautiful day
And something reminds you you wish I had stayed
You can plan for a change in the weather and time
But I never plan on me changing my mind
So I'll go
Sit on the floor wearing your clothes
All that I know is I don't know
Never thought we'd have a last kiss
Never imagined we'd end like this
Your name, forever the name on my lips
Just like our last kiss
Forever the name on my lips
Forever the name on my lips
Just like our last...
The 1
I'm doing good, I'm on some new shit
Been saying "yes" instead of "no"
I thought I saw you in the parking lot, I didn't though
I hit the ground running each night
I hit the Sunday matinée
You know the greatest films of all time were never made
I guess you never know, never know
And if you wanted me, and it really showed
But if you never bleed, you're never gonna grow
And it's alright now
But we were something, don't you think so?
Roaring twenties, tossing pennies in the pool
And if my wishes came true
It would've been me and you
In my defense, I have none
For never leaving well enough alone
But it would've been fun
If I would've been the one
I had this dream you're doing cool shit
Having adventures on your own
You meet some woman on the internet and take her home
We never painted by the numbers, baby
But we were making it count
You know the greatest loves of all time are over now
I guess you never know, never know
And it's another day never waking up alone
But we were something, don't you think so?
Roaring twenties, tossing pennies in the pool
And if my wishes came true
It would've been me and you
In my defense, I have none
For never leaving well enough alone
But it would've been fun
If I would've been the one
I, I, I persist and resist the temptation to ask you
If one thing had been different
Would everything be different today?
We were something, don't you think so?
Rosé flowing with your chosen family
And it would've been sweet
If it could've been me
In my defense, I have none
For digging up the grave another time
But it would've been fun
If I would've been the one
Don't Blame Me
Don't blame me, love made me crazy
If it doesn't, you ain't doin' it right
Lord, save me, my drug is my baby
I'd be usin' for the rest of my life
I've been breakin' hearts a long time, and
Toyin' with them other guys
Just to play things for me to use
Something happened for the first time, in
The darkest little paradise
Shakin, pacin', I just need you
For you, I would cross the line
I would waste my time
I would lose my mind
They say she's gone too far this time
Don't blame me, love made me crazy
If it doesn't, you ain't doin' it right
Lord, save me, my drug is my baby
I'd be usin' for the rest of my life
Don't blame me, love made me crazy
If it doesn't, you ain't doin' it right
Oh, Lord, save me, my drug is my baby
I'd be usin' for the rest of my life
My name is whatever you decide
And I'm just gonna call you mine
I'm insane, but I'm your baby
Echoes, love your name inside my mind
Halo, hiding my obsession
I once was poison ivy, but now I'm your daisy
And baby, for you, I would fall from grace
Just to touch your face
If you walk away
I'd beg you on my knees to stay
Don't blame me, love made me crazy
If it doesn't, you ain't doin' it right
Lord, save me, my drug is my baby
I'd be usin' for the rest of my life
Don't blame me, love made me crazy
If it doesn't, you ain't doin' it right
Oh, Lord, save me, my drug is my baby
I'd be usin' for the rest of my life
I get so high, oh
Every time, yeah every time you're lovin' me
You're lovin' me
Trip of my life, oh
Every time, yeah every time you're touchin' me
You're touchin' me
Every time, yeah every time you're lovin' me
Oh Lord, save me, my drug is my baby
I'd be usin' for the rest of my life
Usin' for the rest of my life, oh
Don't blame me, love made me crazy
If it doesn't, you ain't doin' it right
Lord, save me, my drug is my baby
I'd be usin' for the rest of my life, oh
Don't blame me, love made me crazy
If it doesn't, you ain't doin' it right
Oh, Lord, save me, my drug is my baby
I'd be usin' for the rest of my life
I get so high, oh
Every time, yeah every time you're lovin' me
You're lovin' me
Oh, Lord, save me, my drug is my baby
I'd be usin' for the rest of my life