Always is Enough
The conclusion to the story where Better is Enough left off. Will our dynamic duo finally decide what exactly it is that they want… and can they make it happen.
All standard disclaimers apply.
AN: I don't know if this will be 'third times the charm', or 'one too many'. Crossing my fingers.
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Detective Kate Beckett still had a smile on her face as she sped down the interstate. She'd left Castle's Hamptons home more than an hour ago, but she couldn't stop smiling. It had been an amazing trip. She only had a four day vacation including travel time. She was now on her way home. She had to work tomorrow but the three full days she spent at Castle's… mansion, there was no other way to describe it, were wonderful.
Being with Castle had been great. She shook her head. She was acting like a smitten teen ager. She was a grown-ass woman and she wasn't smitten. She was enjoying the feelings that she was experiencing. It wasn't love, not yet anyway. But she had hope that it could and would eventually lead to that. Of course there was that nagging little voice in the back of her mind that would remind her that she didn't deserve to be loved. Could it be that Richard Castle could finally silence that voice?
Kate glanced down at her gauges and realized that she was running low on fuel. Luckily she could see a station just a short way ahead. She grinned because she could see it had a mini mart connected to it. She could get something to drink, and maybe a candy bar to munch on.
She'd had a large breakfast with Rick, but left before she had any lunch. They were too busy saying goodbye with their lips. No words, just lips.
Kate pulled into the station and sidled up to a gas pump. She swung her leg over and kicked the stand down so she wouldn't have to worry about it tipping over while she filled up her tank.
As she pulled the nozzle from its slot and inserted it into the port in her cycle's tank another motorcycle pulled up beside her. Between the pumps she was able to see his big Harley Davidson American Flyer. He smiled at her as he dismounted and pulled down the hose and inserted it into his gas tank.
"That's a really nice Harley Soft Tail you've got there." He nodded toward her bike.
"Thanks, you've got a nice bike too." She let her detective's eye roam over him. He was tall, a good six four. Well-built too. He had a good head of dark hair and he had a nice smile. His voice was pleasant, masculine but not too much bass.
"So how long have you been riding?"
Kate shrugged. "About an hour, maybe an hour and a half."
He chuckled. He had a nice laugh. "No, I meant how long have you had your bike."
Beckett blushed. "Oh, sorry. I've had it since high school. I took a summer job between my junior and senior year, saved up enough to buy her." Kate chuckled. "My dad was not thrilled."
He laughed. "My name's Josh, Josh Davidson."
"I'm Kate Beckett."
"Were are you headed, Kate?"
"Home, back to New York City. I have to be at work early tomorrow morning."
Josh gave her a knowing nod. "Yeah, I have an early shift too."
They both holstered the nozzles on their individual pumps and headed inside to pay for their gas.
"So Kate, what is it that an attractive woman such as yourself does to make ends meet?"
Beckett hoped he meant it innocently, but it somehow came off a bit off color. It sounded like a pick up line to her.
She gave him a side glance. "I'm a homicide detective."
Josh's step faltered for a second. He regained his stride quickly. "That's pretty impressive. I imagine it gives you a lot of satisfaction to solve a murder."
Kate stopped and Josh did too. "Thank you. Yes it does. How about yourself? What do you do when you're on the clock?"
It looked to her that he suddenly pumped his chest up a bit. His smile seemed self-satisfying. "I'm a thoracic heart surgeon. I'm affiliated with several hospitals in New York. And I also volunteer for Doctors without Borders."
Kate smiled at him. "Now it's my turn to be impressed."
They stayed quiet while they paid for their gas. Kate grabbed a couple of candy bars to give her a bit of energy to get home on. Once they reached their bikes again. Josh placed his hand on her arm.
"I was thinking, Kate, that maybe we should stop and get something to eat." He pointed toward highway. "There's decent barbeque place about 10, 12 miles down the road. It'd be my treat."
Kate threw her leg over her bike. "I appreciate the offer, Josh. But I have to get home and get cleaned up for bed. I'm bushed and I have to be in early tomorrow." She pulled her arm away from his hand.
He laid his hand on the back of her hand. "Ah come on, Kate. It won't take up too much time. I'd like a chance to get to know you better. You seem like a great gal. I think we could have some fun together."
Kate kicked her starter over and her bike roared to life. "Look, Josh." He had to lean close to hear her. "You seem like a nice guy, but I'm tired, I want to go home. And I want to call my boyfriend before I turn in for the night."
She gave him half a wave as she engaged the clutch and sped away.
Maybe claiming she had a boyfriend might have been putting the cart before the horse, but she was pretty sure that Castle wouldn't mind.
He didn't.
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Detective Kate Beckett sat at her desk scowling at the screen of her computer. No matter how she worded her request for the information she needed all she got back was garbage. She had been warned upon coming in this morning that there were some problems in the system and their computers probably wouldn't be functioning properly until tech had found and fixed the problem.
She needed the problem fixed! She had warrants she needed, and she needed them now.
Neither Esposito nor Ryan seemed too bothered by their inability to function. They were too busy flicking paper footballs through uprights fashioned with their thumbs and index fingers. She was ready to tear her hair out in frustration if it wasn't for the fact that her hair just looked too good this morning.
Kate was saved by the bell. The elevator bell. That wonderful bell that signaled that her day was going to improve dramatically. Her coffee had arrived.
Castle gave her a big smile as he deposited her cup on the edge of her desk. She could smell the two pumps of sugar free vanilla latte wafting lazily to her nose. Accompanying the heaven that was her coffee was the ever present bag that held a fresh bear claw. Suddenly the morning was not so bad.
"Hey Castle, you're just in time. I'm going crazy here."
"Well Beckett, it's a good thing I got here then. What is the cause of your impending insanity?"
"Well, aside from them." She pointed toward Esposito and Ryan. They gave Castle a half-hearted wave, never losing their concentration on their field goal attempts. "Our computers are on the fritz. All my warrants are stalled in the system."
"Oh, oh, that sounds serious." Castle stood up from the chair he'd just sat down in. "I'm guessing one cup of coffee isn't going to be enough. I'll make you another one since it seems you pretty much have finished the one I just brought you."
Kate gave him a sheepish grin. "Thanks."
Castle had gotten back from his summer in the Hamptons a couple of months ago. After a couple of weeks of working on edits at home in the loft, he had finished Naked Heat and was ready to come back to the precinct. Which he did.
A smile just appeared on her face. That had been happening to her more and more. Kate was happy to have her partner and friend back. She had missed her partner, but she had missed her friend more.
Castle spent the next two hours trying to keep Beckett from physically going to where ever the tech people, who were supposed to be fixing their computer system, were hiding. They'd tell her what was holding things up, and how soon that they'd be up and running again, or she'd have to shoot them.
Castle interrupted her glaring contest with her monitor. "Hey Beckett, since things are a bit stalled right now, why don't we go and get some lunch?"
Beckett rolled her eyes. "Sure, we haven't accomplished anything so far today. So why not just leave the precinct and go out and have lunch. We need a break from all the sitting around being unproductive."
Castle grinned as he stood and held out his hand to her. "Somebody is grumpy. I know just how to help with that. How about Remy's?"
Kate's frown slowly managed to straighten out, then turn up at the corners. She allowed herself to be helped out of her chair. "Oh what the hell. I guess we've got nothing better to do."
"Hey, bring us back something!" Both Ryan and Esposito called out as Castle and Beckett headed for the elevator.
Beckett made herself comfortable in their booth, while Castle grabbed the menu. Did they really have a their booth? And what was Castle doing looking at the menu. They always ordered the same thing when they ate here. And they did eat there a lot. The shakes were just too sinful. He always got chocolate, while she preferred strawberry. But she wasn't above stealing a few slurps of his while she was at it. Cheeseburgers and fries always completed their orders.
Kate was stirring her shake with the straw when she grabbed Castle's hand to get his attention. "So, the way I see it, even if they have the systems up and running when we get back I'm not going to be able to do much until tomorrow. The warrants I'm waiting for will have to be signed by a judge which isn't going to happen until tomorrow at the earliest."
Castle leaned close. "Do tell"
Kate pulls a face. "So, as I was going to say before I was so rudely interrupted. What would you say to coming over to my place for dinner?"
Castle leaned back against the seat. "Are you cooking? Or will we be ordering in?"
"Does it matter?"
Castle shook his head. "Not really, though I will admit that I'm curious to sample your cooking. You put together some great breakfast feasts when you stayed with us last year."
Kate suddenly found herself twirling a lock of hair. Realizing what she was doing she quickly shifted to tucking the long lock behind her ear. "Well I was thinking we could call in an order on the way home. I'm afraid my larder is a bit bare."
"Do you have wine?"
"Of course."
"Then I accept. What should we order?"
Kate shrugged. "We can figure that out before we leave the precinct."
"Sounds good. This will give me a chance to see your new apartment. I never got around to seeing it after you moved out of the loft." He gave her a fake pout. "Someone forgot to invite me."
"Yeah, sorry about that, but I was a bit of a mess." She grabbed his hand. "But I would like to thank you again for what you did, inviting me into your home when you didn't have to."
"You could have stayed longer. You were never an imposition. You didn't have to go bunk in with Lanie after only two weeks at the Loft. Both mother, and Alexis enjoyed having you there."
"I appreciate the sentiment, but I didn't want to overstay my welcome."
"You could never do that, Kate."
Beckett dropped her head which allowed her long hair to cover her blush.
She pushed her hair back as she stood up. "We should be getting back. Did you order something for the boys?"
Castle nodded. Yeah, I ordered the Big Party Dozen Pack. A dozen burgers, and a dozen orders of fries. It should be ready to pick up on the way out."
Beckett looked surprised. "I know those two eat like piranha most of the time, but don't you think that you over did it just a bit?"
Castle waved off her concern. "I figure any the boys don't eat, someone will clean up after them if we just put it in the breakroom."
Kate smiles. "I give it fifteen minutes, tops."
Actually, fifteen minutes was generous. After a smiling Esposito and Ryan took the box into the break room. The buzz was out, and within ten minutes only a large empty box sat alone on the table.
Kate was happy that the system problem had been corrected by the time they got back so she could get on with her job. Of course because of the long down time, there was an inevitable back log that would take some time to take care of.
"Hey, Beckett." Kate turned toward Ryan.
"Don't you know a Detective Raglin?"
Her look was guarded. "Yes. He was the lead detective on my mother's murder. He couldn't be bothered to actually investigate, so he wrote it off as random gang violence."
Ryan nodded. "Oh yeah, I remember that now. Anyway, I just heard from O'Malley down at the front desk. Apparently, a retired detective John Ragin ate his gun last night."
Kate looked surprised. Could this be something related to her mother's murder?
Ryan continued. "The word is he was just diagnosed with lymphoma, didn't have much time left, had nothing left to fight for so he took the easy way out."
Castle watched Beckett's reaction. He took her hand in his. "Do you think this was like Raglin? Would he do that?"
Beckett stared at Castle for several beats. "I didn't know Raglin personally. I only met him a couple of times. But I can see him as someone who takes the easy way out. He never fought for my mother. I guess I can believe he wouldn't even fight for a few extra days of life." Kate grabbed her bag and her jacket and stood up. "You ready to go, Castle?"
He nodded. "Sure, you decide what you want to eat?"
"Yeah, I'll call in some Chinese." She pulled her phone out as they walked toward the elevator.
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Roy Montgomery sat at his desk…waiting. He watched his best detective leave with her shadow partner a little over an hour ago. Most of the other day watch personnel were already gone too. Normally he'd have been home, or on his way by now, but he was waiting. Waiting for an encrypted email to enter his inbox.
He assumed that the person on the other end of the expected message would have heard about Raglin, and would be wondering what the fallout might be from his death. Roy was waiting patiently for the email he knew would come.
For 12 years he had been living in fear. He had done what he did to protect his family and Beckett. He held a sword over the head of the Dragon, but it was a somewhat precarious thread the sword hung from. As long as the Dragon was convinced that Roy was keeping their agreement, then those Roy protected would stay safe. As long as Roy was the one holding the evidence he felt safe, because Roy was just as guilty.
Roy Montgomery was a good man who made a critical mistake. A mistake that molded the rest of his life to date. Nineteen years ago a rookie detective got caught up in a scheme perpetrated by a couple of veteran detectives he rode with. It was a wilder time, and the cops were tired of the bad guys always getting off easy. So their brilliant idea was to kidnap a few wise guys and tune them up a bit. After that they would ransom them back to their respective families. It worked well, until it didn't. While trying to kidnap a mob enforcer, Joe Pulgatti; a companion tried to intervene. A struggle ensued and a gun went off. The companion, Bob Arman, was killed. The kicker was, Bob Arman was an undercover FBI agent. Pulgatti was framed for the murder, and to this day was still serving his time in prison.
The final straw was the inclusion of an innocent. Pulgatti was able to convince a righteous young lawyer, Johanna Beckett, to look into his case. A problem that the Dragon eventually solved by having the lawyer, and a three more associates, murdered.
They say no good deed goes unpunished, but what about the bad deeds. Those can stain your soul.
Roy in some regards was the lucky one. He was smart. Whereas his old partners John Raglin and Gary Macalister became errand boys for the Dragon until they had no value left in them. Montgomery had secured some protection. Knowing that all the evidence that he kept in a file locked away in a safe at his house would also convict himself, he merely used it as a failsafe. You leave me alone, and I'll leave you alone. It was the mutual destruction aspect that kept everyone quiet.
Roy, knowing that what had been done was done, served his penance by becoming the best cop he could be. And began mentoring as many promising rookies he came in contact with. Becoming a Captain was the best position to allow him to do so. Then along came Kate Beckett. In her he saw his true redemption. Through her, he saw a way to save his soul. So he extended his protection to her.
That protection came in both the damning file he held but also in getting her assigned to his precinct where he could watch over her and keep her away from the black hole her mother's murder had become for her.
Roy had been worried when they had accidently came across Dick Coonan in another, totally unconnected, case. Coonan had been the professional killer who had committed the actual murder of Johanna Beckett. He had been exposed while being involved in another murder that came across Detective Beckett's plate. It was fortunate for all when Beckett was forced to kill Coonan to save Castle's life.
It did give Kate a small measure of comfort knowing she got the guy who did the actual deed. But she still didn't know who ordered the hit, and he hoped she never would. Roy remembered a cassette tape that he'd secretly managed to record in which the Dragon incriminated himself for Johanna Beckett's murder. As far as the Dragon knew, Roy still had that tape as part of his protection file. Roy didn't have it. He'd given it to Mrs. Beckett as a backup in case anything happened to him. He had no idea where it was now. It was evident that Kate never found it.
Roy's attention was drawn to his computer screen. An incoming email icon flashed. He wasted no time in opening it. All it said was – "Raglin?".
Knowing that the return message would automatically be encrypted also, Roy framed his reply.
"Raglin dying from cancer, committed suicide. Had no prior contact with anyone of note. Macalister has sold his apartment and has disappeared now that Raglin is dead. Discovered he bought a ticket to Miami. Will likely skip the country. Don't expect him to ever surface again. All protocols and protections remain in place. Everything is status quo".
Roy read it over, then sent it. Once the email was sent, a special program on his computer wiped any record of its existence.
Montgomery shut down his computer, grabbed his jacket as he rose from his seat and left his office, turning the light out as he closed the door.
Roy knew that the arrangement he'd been living with for over 12 years wouldn't last forever. But he was going to do whatever it took to make it last as long as he could.
Should things go to hell, he still had one more ace up his sleeve. He had a friend he trusted, he just hoped it would never come to that.
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Castle was holding the bag of Chinese takeout as Beckett opened the door to her apartment. She was smiling as she stepped aside allowing Castle to move into the kitchen and set the bag on the island.
"There's a couple of bottles of wine in the fridge." Kate waved her hand toward the refrigerator in the corner. She knew it wasn't as good as the wine that Castle was used to, but it would do, and she knew he wouldn't complain.
Castle looked about, taking in her apartment. This was the first time he'd been here. Not unlike her former apartment, it was an open plan with the kitchen appliances near the door. A small dining nook off to one side, and a large counter top island separating the food area from the living area. Rick noticed a short hallway leading off to the left. He assumed it led to the bedroom and bath.
"This is really nice." He walked over and studied a large oil painting that was hanging on the far wall. He didn't quite understand it, but it was colorful. "How much of your stuff were you able to save?"
She walked over and put her hand on his arm. "I was able to save most of my bedroom stuff, but the living room was a complete loss. I was able to find a lot of interesting pieces at various yard sales, and a lot came from the going out of business sale of a boutique furniture shop just down the street. Their misfortune was my benefit."
Castle nodded. "Well, I'd say you did a very good job refurnishing your living space." He noticed several bookshelves adorning the large wall opposite the windows facing the street. "I know you read a lot. How many of your books did you lose?"
Beckett sighed. "A lot. I've been replacing whatever I can from second-hand book stores, and rummage sales. It's my main diversion when I have a day off."
"Well, I'd be happy to replace all your Richard Castle books. I'll even autograph them for you." He grinned at her.
"What makes you think I had all your books?" Castle pulled a face. Kate laughed. "Actually, most of my Castle books were originally my mother's."
Castle grabbed her hand. "I'm sorry, there's no way to replace those."
Kate shook her head. "You're right." A sly grin tugged at her mouth. "It's lucky that I kept them in the bedroom."
"Why Katherine Beckett, you are a fan if you keep them in your bedroom where they are easier to access."
She shrugged. "They helped me fall asleep."
Castle laughed. "Touché."
Kate grabbed a couple of wine glasses as Castle grabbed some plates. Once the silverware was obtained they seated themselves on a couple of stools by the island and dug in. Conversation was between mouthfuls of their dinner.
"So, do you think that Raglin ever really knew anything about your mother's murder or was he just a lazy cop who didn't try very hard?" Castle shoved a forkful into his mouth.
Kate set down her fork. "Like I said, I only talked to him a couple of times, but he struck me as someone who took the easiest way out. Talk around the precinct was that Raglin drank, and played the ponies. And wasn't very good at either."
Castle waved a forkful of some sort of chicken. "Wouldn't that make him ideal for a cover up? He'd be vulnerable to bribery and with his exploitable problems he'd be an easy mark."
Kate chewed, and swallowed. "I always thought so, but I didn't have any proof that he was anything but lazy. It seems like the only person who actually worked with him was his sometime partner, Gary Macalister."
Rick took a sip of wine. "Did you ever talk to him?"
Beckett wiped her mouth with a napkin. "No, Raglin was the lead so he was the only one I ever talked to."
"Maybe we should?"
Kate nodded her head thoughtfully. "That's not a bad idea. I'll see if I can locate him tomorrow." Beckett began to clear away the empty cartons and put the dishes in the sink. Castle pitched in.
She took his hand and led him over to her couch. He settled at one end, and she placed herself in the middle where she could be close, but had the room to shift herself and face Castle.
As Rick snuggled in against the well upholstered arm he noticed a box sitting on the lower shelf of the end table. The cover had slipped off and he could see that there were pictures in the box. He leaned over and grabbed it.
"Now what do we have here? Why it looks like family pictures."
"Castle!" She reached, trying to grab the box.
Rick shifted to protect his prize. "Oh, these are precious. I guess there is some proof that Kate Beckett bad ass detective did have a softer side. He held up a picture, showing her in figure skates. "Pink skates? They're so cute!"
She reached over and punched him in the arm. "They were awesome."
"I'm assuming the woman in the pictures with you is your mother?" He held up several pictures.
Kate nodded. "Yeah, they were taken when I came back from Stanford for a visit."
Rick was chuckling. He was having a great time. "Just look at you. You were adorable back then."
Kate raised a brow. "I'm still adorable." She sighed again. "Those were taken when I came home from Stanford for Christmas break. It was the last time I saw her. She was killed a couple of weeks later."
Castle offered her a comforting expression. "I imagine that these pictures, then, are both happy memories and sad memories."
"Yeah, they are. But the good outweighs the bad. That's why I keep them where I can easily get them. If I ever feel overwhelmed about anything. Seeing my mom again helps. She always used to say that God would never give you more than you could handle. There's been several times over the years where I thought she might have been wrong, but I'm still here."
Castle smiled. "And you have me."
Kate quickly brushed an errant tear from her cheek. She smiled back. "And I have you."
Castle waggled his brows. "So, what do you want to do with me?
Kate nearly spit out the wine she had unfortunately chose to drink at that moment. She quickly wiped her mouth with the napkin that had protected the coffee table from the glass's wet ring.
She took a moment to gain her composure. "What would you like to do with me?"
Castle's smile grew large. He pulled her close to him. "I would love to make out like a couple of horney teenagers. Show you the fire and passion you ignite in me."
Kate bit her lower lip. "Okay."
Lips met, hands roamed, and tongues pushed for and were quickly granted entrance. Soft moans and loud squeals were repeated over and over. Shirts found their way to the floor and perspiration became sweat.
Kate was losing her control. Castle was amazing. He had hands that knew just what part of her body needed attention where and when. His lips found erogenous zones she didn't know she had. She was literally melting under his attention.
She needed to stop this. She needed to know.
Gasping for breath, Kate managed to separate herself from Castle. "Rick, please. Give me a moment here. We have to talk."
"That can't be good." Castle leaned back in the couch, a wary look on his face. "If I overstepped, I'm sorry. I truly thought that this was what you wanted."
Kate grabbed his hands. She hadn't bothered to put her shirt back on. "Oh, have no doubt that this is what I want, and eventually more." She took one hand and dragged it through her dark locks in a futile attempt to get them back in some semblance of order.
"I asked you what you would like to do with me, and you showed me. You showed me in a way that I frankly had never been shown before."
"But?" Castle's tone was guarded.
She shook her head. "No but. You know me as well as anyone knows me outside of my father, and I'm not too sure about that. I'm generally a closed off person. I don't share willingly. And I've had to go it alone so long I don't really know how to let someone in."
She stood, and paced in front of him. "A few minutes ago, you told me that I had you."
He nodded. "That's correct."
"Do I?" Kate steps in from of him and glides her hand along his jaw. "You are Richard Castle. You are a celebrity. You are rich. You can have any woman that you want."
"Kate, you know that most of that womanizing you've seen on page 6 is just an image that my publisher and my agent have concocted to sell books. Since I met you, not a one of those escorts" He emphasized that word. "have ever gone home with me." He took back her hand.
"Now you have to answer a question for me." Now Kate looked a bit skittish. "What do you really want?"
Beckett clasped her hands together, and took a deep breath. It was now or never.
"I want to find a man who understands my faults and who will help me overcome them. I want to find a man who is there to back my plays and let me back his. Someone who can just jump in there for me as I would jump in for him."
Rick leaned over and gave her a sweet kiss on the lips. "Do you want me to be that man?"
Beckett nodded. "Yes."
Castle smiled broadly. "So ask your question, Kate."
Kate, with a sheen over her green eyes, stared up into Rick's brilliant blues. "Will you have and hold me…in your heart?"
"Always."
Kate smiles, tears slowly sliding down her cheeks. She reaches out and takes Rick's hand again and pulls him down the short hallway to their left. He assumes it leads to her bedroom.
It does.
Fin
AN: Okay, that's the end of the trilogy. Hope it was satisfactory. One note: Since this was an AU season 2 to season 3 story, I used "The Dragon" instead of Bracken even though we all know that Montgomery would know him. It was because, at this time, the audience didn't know. Thanks to any and all gentle readers; review if you wish.