Emma opened her eyes to the sound of the alarm going berserk beside her. Reaching over she quickly shut it off and groaned. She closed her eyes and took a few moments to revel in the morning bliss before dragging herself up and into the shower.
She washed her dirty blonde hair with her favourite coconut shampoo and rinsed for longer than needed under the hot faucet. She thought about her first therapy session from the other day. She didn't know what to feel about it. The place, the people, the vibe.. she just couldn't quite put her finger on it. She didn't want to give up completely, but her meeting with Dr Regina Mills hasn't changed her mind on the fact that she thinks it's a load of bs.
She stepped out from the water and wrapped her slender, toned body in a dark soft grey towel. She glanced at herself in the mirror to take in the beaten older look she's took on, before leaning down to the sink to brush her teeth.
"Good morning Swan" A rich English voice called. The blonde turned and smiled at her friend.
"Killian, how are you?" Emma nodded as she continued her walk down the busy station line.
The tall brunette ran to catch up with the blonde, bobbing and weaving between on coming strangers. He pulled his bag firmly into his shoulder and smiled as he reached her.
"Where you off to Swan?" He asked matching her pace.
"I'm meeting Ruby down town somewhere. For coffee." She replied calmly as she swiftly cut across the mans path and into the train that just pulled in. He followed.
"Ah Ruby! How is she? She hasn't called me back since that night at Joe's...I think I did something wrong. Wha'dya say?" He asked, squishing down into the seat next to the blonde.
She groaned as he did and rolled her eyes.
"You know Ruby Killian. She isn't one for small talk and all that." Emma sighed.
"Oh come on. After the night I showed her -"
"Okay okay" Emma groaned. "I'll mention it to her"
"Great" Killian smiled with a toothy grin. "Anyway, this is my stop next. I'm off to class completely unprepared but my face should get me off" He smirked, reaching up and rubbing his stubble around his chin.
"I'll see you at work?" He asked, getting up and backing away from the blonde towards the doors.
"Sure will" she nodded and sighed a sigh of relief once he'd slipped out the doors and down the station and out of view.
She liked the guy, don't get her wrong. She just couldn't stand it when he meddled with friends or ex's of hers. She's known Killian for a few years when she started working for a local coffee shop. He became a regular there but she left before a friendship or anything more could fester. She had forgotten all about the mysterious Englishman until she started her first shift at Joe's. He was there serving customers right in front of her. She didn't realise it until he made a move later in the evening and asked for her number. She made it clear that nothing would happen as at the time, Emma had a love interest. He just shrugged it off and saw it as a challenge ever since. (Hooking up with every friend or ex girlfriend of the blondes)
Emma snapped out of her thought bubble when she came to her stop. She grabbed her bag and quickly stepped off the train before the rush hit her and headed for the nearest exit.
After a 5 minute walk she rounded the corner lined with tall buildings in colours of browns and creams with baskets of flowers handing from doors. A little further up the street, it opened into a wide circle with small businesses and cafe's lining it. In the centre of the circle stood a beautiful grey marble fountain that stood a woman and child in. Emma noticed how beautiful the statues complimented the picnic area surrounding it.
'Swan!' Ruby called across the space, motioning for Emma to join her at the small tablet she occupied under a pale pink umbrella outside of her favourite cafe. 'Granny's'.
Emma sat down and smiled, shoving her bag under her chair and shrugging off her jacket and draping it over her seat. She brushed her blonde locks from her face and looked up at the pretty blonde dressed in a funk floral top holding a notepad.
'What can I get you ladies today?' She asked.
'Can I get a Vanilla latte with extra cream and a small donut' Ruby chirped, Clearly skipping breakfast this morning.
'Uh, just a coffee for me' Emma smiled before leaning back in her chair. 'Oh maybe a bear claw?'
'No problem! I'll get that for you now' the blonde smiled before turning on her heels and bouncing away inside the cafe.
'So, how was it?' Ruby asked, crossing her arms together and leaning toward the blonde on the table.
'It was...weird? I don't know' Emma sighed.
'What do you mean?'
'We'll..not much happened. It lasted about 10 minutes...and the receptionist was a bitch!' Emma explained.
'Maybe it will be different next time? The first one is always hard!' Ruby encouraged.
'Yeah..' Emma nodded in agreement. Mostly just so Ruby would get off her back about it. She was embarrassed enough by the fact she had to see someone because of all of her trauma, let alone her best friend mentioning it constantly.
'What was they like?' Ruby asked curiously.
Emma smirked. 'She was hot'
Ruby matched Emma's smirk, clearly thinking the same thing as the blonde.
'Before you even think about it, she married. Plus, I would rather not mix business and pleasure' Emma giggled.
The petite blonde from before sauntered over to the women holding a black tray with two tall classes full of warm coffee and two small plates carrying the order of donut and bear claw.
Emma thanked the lady before picking up the coffee and taking a long, deserved sip.
'I'm seeing her again this week. I'll let you know how this one goes' Emma laughed.
-4 days Later-
'Evening Miss swan. I'm sorry that I had to push our session today, I hope this time isn't too late or caused you any issues?' Regina smiled warmly across the low lit room to the blonde.
'No, not at all.' Emma replied calmly. She hasn't had much planned for today. After all it was her day off from Joe's and Ruby was out on yet another date, so what harm would pushing the session do? It was only 6pm.
'So for our session today I was hoping for us to delve into things abit. If that's alright with you?' Regina asked, looking up from her notepad.
'Uh...yeah. I guess that's the point of this right?' Emma jokes, trying to lighten her own mood.
Regina smiled with devilish red lips.
'Only if you feel comfortable to do so Emma..' Regina said softly.
Emma noted how the woman spoke her name. Deep, soft, rich with a velvety coating. The blonde liked her name in the brunettes mouth.
'Where should we start?' Emma asked. Surprisingly to herself at that. Something about the woman made Emma feel at ease. Like she could trust her not to judge her.
'Why don't you tell me about your childhood?' Regina smiled, relaxing into the sofa seat.
'Okay...I was boring in a small town called Storybrook in Maine.' Emma started slowly, only looking up rarely to catch Reginas reaction.
'Or at least I think So. My mother was supposedly a drug addict that couldn't look after me. She left me on the side of the road by the 'welcome to storybrook' sign, wrapped in nothing but a knitted blanket with my name stitched into it.' Emma stopped, looking up.
Regina's eyes were staring into Emma's soul. Listening, hearing her story. Emma noticed how she kept her manicured hand pressed to her chin as she listened intently. She smiled and nodded for Emma to continue.
'I grew up in foster care. One home to the next. I couldn't quite settle anywhere until I finally found a family. Susan and John. They were great, I stayed with them for two years, the longest I'd ever stayed anywhere' Emma explained, smiling at the memory of her parents.
'Why only two years? What happened?' Regina finally spoke.
'I was coming home from school one day in johns truck with Susan and their dog. It was cold that winter and more icy that usual. I guess John forgot to grip chain the tyres...' Emma stopped.
Thinking for a moment, feeling the lump climb in the back of her throat, she wondered if she should continue. The brunette leaning forward pushing a box of tissues towards the blonde. She smiled warmly as she met the blondes gaze.
'They both died on the scene. I got out with only a few scrapes.' Emma pulled down the collar on her tshirt revealing her collar bone to the brunette.
'This is a constant reminder' Emma watched the brunette as her gaze flew across her collar bone and to the pink scar that laid there.
'What does it make you feel when you see that?' Regina asked.
Emma thought for a moment in the silence.
'It reminds me that no matter what, I will never have the family I dream of..' she said softly, sadly.
Regina felt her own heart faulter for a moment. She quickly snapped out of it and into her professional form before deciding what to say to the broken woman before her.
'Emma, life is a funny thing for all of us. Devastating circumstances always stay with us for life. Scars or not scars. Unfortunately in life people have to lose things or people they love to learn what it is to love in the first place...My father used to say to me 'Is it not better to have loved and lost than to not love at all?' I still think of that today, Because the answer is yes' Regina explained softly in her rich voice. She felt the blonde ease gently as she wiped a small tear that escaped her green eye and began to run down her cheek.
'It's also safe for you feel however you want here Emma. You can cry' Regina encouraged. Noticing how the blonde wanted to hide herself.
'Thanks for the offer but I'll pass' Emma laughed, shrugging away her sadness.
Two months had passed since Emma started therapy with Dr. Mills. The blonde had started to come out of her shell and Regina had now heard the root of causes for the blondes struggles. She can't settle. She moved from town to town, city to city searching for acceptance that she felt she never got. Now the brunette had a solid idea of what to go on, she started to help the blonde in every way.
She had handed Emma a small piece of paper at their last session with what seemed to be Reginas private number scribbled onto it in a fierce cursive. Emma had tucked it away somewhere safe.
So safe she wasn't sure where.