A/N: Hey, friends! Thanks for continuing to read! This chapter is a little redundant, but kind of necessary to clear the first steps with a therapist. It also has mentions of self-harm and the assault, please tread with caution.

I hope you guys enjoy!

Luke didn't even realize he was bouncing on his toes in the turbolift until his father set a gentle hand on his shoulder, trying to still him.

"You are anxious," he pointed out, recognizing it even without Luke's Force presence. Luke blew out a deep breath as he nodded reluctantly.

"A little," he admitted. His father ran a thumb over the shoulder he held. Luke gave him a small, nervous smile, hating how vulnerable he must have looked.

"You will be fine, young one," his father assured. "She is a very kind woman." Luke nodded again as he cast his gaze to the ground, biting his lip. He sure hoped she would be nice, for the idea of spilling his guts to a stranger almost made him nauseous.

Luke's father approached him about a therapist the week prior, mere hours after meeting with the woman, to tell him he believed he found a match for Luke. He said the woman's name was Mebal Izaberk. She not only had extensive experience with trauma survivors, but was incredibly kind. Most likely believing all nice people got along by default, he predicted the two would be a good fit.

Luke wanted to believe his father- he really did. Hells, his father was the only one who told him the truth during the war, and he knew now would be no different.

However, he couldn't deny the skepticism stirring in his stomach. What if this woman laughed at him? What if she asked him why he didn't fight off his attacker?

What if she touched him?

But, despite his worries, Luke agreed to go, although more so for his father's sake than his own. If he saw this therapist, at least his father would believe he was doing something effective to help Luke, and maybe wouldn't worry as much.

Luke shook himself from his thoughts, trying ever so hard to steady his racing heart with deep breaths. Stars, how was he going to do this? Meet a stranger and confess his biggest secret? He knew he wouldn't be able to handle it; he'd probably just put on a brave face and tell the woman his father was overreacting and he didn't need services after all. But no, he knew it would be no use, for his father wanted him to see this therapist and would make sure he went. He could tell this woman all the lies he wanted, but his father knew the truth, and as long as he did, he wouldn't tolerate Luke's decline for help.

Luke just thanked the Force his father didn't know the whole truth.

Finally, the turbolift opened its doors and rested on the fifth level, the floor containing a handful of psychologists' offices.

Force, Luke wasn't ready for this.

Nevertheless, he tried to keep up with his father's large strides to the door of the facility holding Mebal's office; however, before they entered, Luke's father set a hand on his shoulder, spun him around, and took both of his shoulders in his large hands to look at him squarely.

"Child," he began, his gaze never wavering from Luke's. "You are taking a great step, I am...very... proud, of you. There is no need to be apprehensive, you are in good hands." Although he fought back tears, especially appreciating how hard his father was trying to help, Luke nodded.

"Take a deep breath," his father told him. "You will do just fine." Luke obeyed, closing his eyes as he blew out his breath in a slow, steady stream. He was going to be fine, just fine. Just like he told Kho, he was very safe.

Luke nodded as he gained the courage to look back up at his father. He held his gloved hand out to Luke, offering physical support. Luke readily accepted, following his father into the office.

Although Luke was fully expecting to feel the opposite, he felt small waves of comfort wash over him as he stepped into the room. The sound of running water, the dim lights, and the absence of anyone else in the waiting room made this ordeal seem easier already.

At that moment, a Twi'lek woman emerged from an office, sparing Luke and his father the mundane experience of waiting.

Although he was counting on feeling very differently, Luke felt immediately relaxed as he laid eyes on this woman.

"Hello," she said, reaching out two hands in which to envelope Luke's. "I'm Mebal Izaberk, and you must be Luke." This recognition instantly made Luke smile, making him feel ten times better already.

"Yes, it's nice to meet you, ma'am." The woman laughed a little.

"Please, call me Mebal," she said. "Come on in. Lord Vader, are you okay to wait out here?" Luke's father inclined his head.

"Yes," he said, giving Luke's hand one final reassuring squeeze. "Child, I will be right here should you need anything." Luke nodded at his father, giving him a small smile.

"Thank you, Father."

After one last look was exchanged between father and son, Mebal led Luke into her small office branching off the side of the larger room. His father was right, the atmosphere was comforting in here as well.

"Go ahead and take a seat," she invited as she sat down herself. "I'm very glad to have you here today." Luke felt his lips curl up into a little smile at Mebal's continued hospitality. He had only met the woman a moment ago and he already felt decently comfortable in her presence.

Maybe this wasn't going to be so bad.

Luke accepted Mebal's invitation and sat down on the couch across from her. He knocked his knees together as he scanned the room, seeing a bookshelf full of psychology books, an array of motivational posters, and quaint little decorations dotting the room. This room seemed far from an office; Luke liked it.

"So," Mebal began as she grinned. "How does it feel to be here?" Luke continued to look around the room, almost trying to find the answer on the walls.

"A lot more calming than I thought," he said. Mebal nodded her head.

"Therapy can be intimidating," she agreed. "So I'm glad you're already finding comfort here. I know this office is small, but I make do with what I have."

"I think it's beautiful," Luke said, still examining the smaller details of the room. "You have a nice sense of style."

"Thank you, dear," Mebal said with a twist of surprise and flattery in her tone. "You have good taste." The two shared a laugh while the Twi'lek got out her clipboard. Mebal then slapped her hands on her knees, gave Luke a mischievous look, and smiled at him.

"Are you ready?" Luke couldn't help but smile himself, not expecting this kind of attitude from a professional therapist at all, but liked it.

"I am," he affirmed. Mebal's smile grew, and she grabbed her pen.

"Wonderful," she said as she got situated. Once she was ready, she met Luke's gaze and looked at him with melting features.

"Let me just say, dear," she started. "That your father cares for you a great deal. He says you mean everything to him." Luke blushed as he almost teared up, casting his gaze to his shoes. He smiled at the ground, thinking back to all the times his father almost said he loved him. He could never quite form the words, but Luke knew they didn't linger far behind his lips.

"He said that?" Luke asked, but quickly regretted it as he realized the connotation that gave.

"I didn't mean it like that," he rushed. "I'm just...glad he expressed that." Mebal held her smile as she tilted her head to the side.

"That is so sweet," she said. "You two seem like very different people and have a stronger bond because of it." Luke smiled as he considered this, and immediately nodded.

"Yeah," he confirmed. "I'd never thought about it like that."

"Have you heard of yin and yang?" Mebal asked. Luke shook his head. She pointed to a symbol on the wall, a circle with swirling black and white with a single dot of the opposite color in each. "The two opposite colors compliment each other to make the circle complete. One color alone would produce only part of the circle, no unity. This tells us contrary forces are interdependent, and speaks to how we are not complete without those who are very different from us."

The longer Luke looked at the symbol, the stronger of a connection he felt with it. His father represented the dark, as his Force presence used to as well. Luke felt a similarity to himself and the white, representing the light side of the Force and his light personality.

"Does that resonate with you?" she asked. Luke smiled as he kept looking up at the decoration.

"Yes," he confirmed. "Very much so." Mebal beamed at him.

"I love that for you and your father," she gushed. "You two seem very close." Luke cast his gaze back to the ground, fighting a blush again, but nodded as he smiled.

"Yes, we're very close." Mebal continued to beam. She let the silence grow for a moment, but then cut in with a question Luke would have rather not answered.

"Now," she began calmly. "Your father shared some information with me when we first met, but I'd like to give you the opportunity to tell me yourself what brought you to me." Luke kept his gaze fixed to the floor, taking a deep breath as he willed himself to answer.

"I…" he began, sighing as he realized there was no alternative to confessing. Force, he hoped he wouldn't cry this time. "I was raped."

Mebal looked at him with such compassion, her expression melting sadly.

"Thank you for sharing that with me, dear. It must have taken a lot of courage." Luke kept his head bowed.

"Thanks," he said shyly.

"Can I share something with you?" Luke nodded. Mebal herself began to look shy, but nevertheless, she leaned forward and donned a serious expression. "I was assaulted, too."

Luke finally brought his head up, the air stilling. He didn't realize he was holding his breath until he almost needed to gasp for air.

"You...you were?" She nodded.

"When I was very young," she explained. "I realize I will never understand what you're going through, Luke, especially as a male survivor, but I understand how isolating this ordeal can feel, and how shameful." Luke's eyes widened and heart opened as a rush of comfort washed over him, finally allowing his muscles to relax. She got it. Someone finally got it.

"Yeah," he whispered, astonished and relieved. "Exactly." Luke gained the courage to meet Mebal's gaze as he felt his lips curl up into a small smile. "Thank you." Mebal mirrored Luke's sad smile.

"Of course, my dear. I have a baseline, but the more you're comfortable sharing, the more I can understand and help you, but never feel like you have to share more than you're comfortable with."

"Thank you, Mebal," he said. She reached out to grab his hand, her petite one warm.

"You are so strong, dear, and we'll work to help you grow even stronger." Luke smiled as she squeezed his hand reassuringly. "I'm looking forward to working with you."

Luke never would have guessed he would have liked going to a place where he had to dump his feelings on a stranger, but with all he had experienced so far, he supposed he could reconsider.

"So, Luke," Mebal began, grabbing her clipboard. "Tell me, what would you like to get out of therapy?" Luke considered this for a moment, wishing he had brought a datapad with notes, but had a general idea.

"I want to learn how to manage this trauma and begin to heal," he declared. Mebal nodded encouragingly.

"That is wonderful," she gushed. "I hope you realize how brave you are for coming here today and beginning that process." Luke blushed as he smiled at the ground. "What else are you looking to accomplish in therapy?" Luke sucked the inside of his cheek in contemplation, but immediately thought of another goal.

"I want to connect better with my father and be honest about how I'm feeling with him." Mebal nodded as she jotted down notes on her clipboard.

"I think that's an excellent goal," she affirmed. "Support from our loved ones is vital to our recovery. I think it's wonderful you want to reach out." Luke felt another wave of relief and comfort wash over him.

"Thanks," he said. Mebal etched something onto her piece of paper.

"Let's see…" She clicked both her pen and her tongue and she ran her finger down her clipboard. "What are some changes you've noticed in yourself? Your father shared some with me, but I wanted to see what you've noticed." Luke nodded, fearing the thought of what his father said.

"I've been really jumpy lately," he explained. "I haven't really been eating well, and I have frequent nightmares and...flashbacks." He fought back the images behind his eyes. Mebal nodded in sympathy, etching more notes onto her clipboard.

"I know this is difficult, but can you describe these visions?" Luke inhaled a trembling breath, exhaling a deeper breath in attempts to steady himself.

"I mainly...feel my attacker," he explained. Mebal scribbled more notes.

"How vivid are these visions?" Luke exhaled shakily.

"Very vivid," he confessed. "It's like…he's touching me again." Mebal nodded as she scribbled.

"How often do you have these visions?" Luke blew out a deep breath rather quickly, despising the way his hands began to quiver.

"Every day," he admitted.

"Are they all the same?" Luke nodded. Mebal finished a particularly long note, then looked up to face Luke.

"I'm so sorry you have to deal with these awful visions, Luke," she said in sympathy. "I can relate, and I know how terrifying they can be." She shook her head. "It can take so much away from you: sleep, appetite-"

"Joy," Luke added, but then wished he'd kept his mouth shut. Mebal looked at him, eyes sadly compassionate.

"Oh, my dear," she cooed. "I'm so sorry." Luke didn't know how to respond, so he settled for shrugging.

"It's part of the package, I guess," he said.

"I know," she said softly, clearly fighting the urge to look down herself. "So you have noticed you haven't found joy in the world around you?" After a moment of hesitation, Luke nodded.

"Flying used to be my favorite, but I haven't flown in weeks, and I usually tinker with ships and other machines in my free time, but I have such a hard time finding the motivation to." He sighed. "It's like I'm not even me anymore."

At this, Mebal set her pen and clipboard down beside her, then reached out her hands in invitation to Luke, to which he accepted.

"My dear," she began. "You have not lost yourself. That monster did not take who you are. You're still Luke, we just need to pull you out of this hole." She ducked her head to meet Luke's downcast gaze. "And we're going to do it. You, me, and your father." Luke smiled a little, reminded of what Han told him as well. Mebal smiled as she squeezed his hands in reassurance.

"You are so strong, Luke," she assured. "So strong." Luke smiled as he bowed his head bashfully. "So, let's keep going," she said. "Can you tell me about your home life?"

Force, Luke was hoping she wouldn't ask that question. He sighed inwardly; how the hell was he going to explain the past four years? His whole life for that matter. Well, he should at least try.

Luke went on to explain the entire Skywalker ordeal (albeit somewhat abridged to accommodate their mere hour together), starting from his adoption at birth, to Ben's lie, the encounter with the emperor, all the way to the present.

The sound of Mebal's pen scratching faded to be so consistent, the silence was deafening when she stopped writing.

"My goodness," she breathed as she finally looked at Luke. "It sounds like you two have really been through the wringer."

Luke could do nothing but laugh a little as she summed it up perfectly.

"Pretty much," he confirmed. Mebal presented him with a sad smile.

"I'm so sorry."

Luke almost felt tears prickle in his eyes as she said this, realizing no one had really acknowledged his struggles like that other than Leia.

"Thank you," he said. "But it's not all like that. I met my twin sister through the war." He then explained how he met Leia and described their relationship now. Mebal continued to write, then gave Luke a warm smile.

"She sounds wonderful," she gushed. "And sounds like a good support system. Have you reached out to her?" At this, Luke bowed his head.

"She...doesn't know," he admitted. Mebal nodded in understanding.

"Do you want to tell her?" She asked, tone void of any pressure or judgement. Finally, Luke nodded.

"Someday," he confirmed. "But not now." Mebal ducked her head down to meet Luke's gaze, offering him a gentle smile.

"It's okay to wait to tell someone your story, Luke," she assured. "It's your choice whether you even want to tell someone or not, but if you choose to, you get to choose the time, place, and method. No one can take that from you." Once again, Luke felt a rush of relief wash over him. She not only understood, but she pointed out a truth Luke hadn't realized before today- he didn't have to tell anyone, nor did he have to feel bad for withholding his story.

As far as his father's less-than-ideal method of exposing Luke's said story, Luke knew he meant well, but by confronting him and revealing his biggest secret in such an abrupt way, he had taken away Luke's voice, his say in the matter; however, as loath as he was to admit it, Luke knew he wouldn't have told his father had his father not brought it up, and he knew his father realized that as well.

"Thank you," Luke said, feeling empowered. Mebal smiled and prompted him to continue through her questions.

"Alright," she said as she clicked her pen and looked down at her clipboard.

"Do you partake in self-harm?" Luke cast down his gaze to the floor, beginning to pick at his cuticles.

"Luke?" she asked after a long moment of silence, probably already knowing the answer.

"Yes," Luke mumbled. Mebal etched into her clipboard.

"What kind of self-harm?" she asked gently. Luke kept his head down.

"I cut."

"How long have you been cutting yourself?"

"A year," he confessed.

"Where do you cut yourself?" she asked. Luke cleared his throat.

"My stomach," he said shyly. Mebal nodded.

"What do you use?"

"A razor." She nodded again, continuing to etch.

"And what does the cutting do for you, Luke?" He picked at his cuticles again.

"It stops the flashbacks," he explained.

"How often do you have these flashbacks?"

"At least three times a day."

"And how often do you cut?" He kept his gaze to the floor.

"Once a day before bed. That's one of the only times I'm alone." Mebal nodded, then finally looked up at Luke.

"I'm sorry you have to hurt yourself for the pain to stop," she said, genuinity saturating her tone. "But we can work on that. Would you be open to trying some methods to help ease the urge to cut?" Luke nodded.

"Yes," he said. "Absolutely." Mebal smiled.

"I admire your willingness to put in the work to start healing." Luke smiled wider this time, appreciating Mebal's kindness more by the minute.

"You keep validating me," he pointed out.

"How does that feel?"

"Wonderful." Mebal offered him another one of her trademark smiles as well.

"I'm so glad. You seem to be comfortable here. Would you agree with that?" Luke nodded.

"Yes," he answered with confidence.

"Your father will be very proud of you, Luke," she assured, offering her hands to Luke once again. "I'm very proud of you."

Luke felt a spark of hope flare into a fire as he took her hands in his own; proud? She really meant that? And she really thought his father would be proud of him for acquiescing to help?

But as Luke looked into Mebal's eyes, her kind, inviting eyes, he realized he wasn't acquiescing at all- he was accepting, this time with more enthusiasm. This time starting to understand it was okay.

"Thank you," he said bashfully. After the two exchanged pleasant looks, Mebal continued. She asked him about his trauma from the war. Luke sighed inwardly, as that was a whole other can of worms. Nevertheless, he went on to explain everything in greater detail than his spiel earlier. He went into the battles he had been in and, as reluctant as he was to say so, his father's role in the war as well. He did, however, remind her of his father's noble act of saving him at the end of the war, redeeming himself in Luke's eyes.

"You are so forgiving, Luke," Mebal praised. "You must love your father a great deal." Luke nodded as he smiled to the ground.

"Yes," he confirmed. "I love him a lot." Mebal's expression melted.

"Your father loves you a great deal as well, Luke," she said. "I can already tell." The two exchanged smiles, then Mebal leaned back and set her clipboard next to her on the table.

"So, that's our time for today," she declared. "But next week, we can pick up where we left off. How does that sound?" Luke felt the now-familiar wave of relief within himself as he realized the power she gave him to make the decisions, to tell his story, to be Luke.

"That sounds perfect," Luke affirmed as he began to stand. Mebal rose and stuck out her hand for Luke to shake.

"I'm looking forward to working with you, Luke," she said as she squeezed his hand in reassurance. Luke smiled at her, a full, toothy smile.

"Thank you, Mebal. I'm looking forward to working with you as well." She opened the door and gestured for Luke to lead the two outside to Luke's father.

Maybe this was going to be okay; maybe he was going to be okay.