It had been only a few days since the Inquisition had returned from Adamant Fortress, along with what remained of the Grey Wardens. She had decided against exiling them, as the Inquisition needed as many allies as they could.

However, she had not escaped criticism from her friends regarding this. Much like them, she knew the Grey Wardens were still vulnerable to Corypheus and his Venatori allies. Nevertheless, as the Inquisitor, her decision was final.

The walk in the Fade had returned her lost memories; the anchor on her hand was not the mark of Andraste but from the orb Corypheus had wielded. It was the Divine who had saved her from the fade, not Andraste. And it had been Stroud who had sacrificed his life so that they could escape.

Upon her return to Skyhold, Eostre had barely left her chamber. There had been a silent agreement amongst everyone not to disturb her unless it was absolutely important. They could also sense a change within Eostre, and they feared for her even more.

The letter that had been delivered to her right before leaving for the siege sat on her desk unopened. The recognizable cursive writing combined with the wax seal confirmed that it was from her father. It would be the first correspondence she had received from him directly, and not through Josephine.

She hesitated to open the letter. Though she did not doubt that her father loved her and held no resentment towards her for the events of that fateful evening, she feared what the letter contained.

"Just open it!" Swallowing hard, she delicately opened the envelope and withdrew the letter, closing her eyes as she did so. Taking a deep breath, she opened the letter and read it, tears forming in her eyes as she did so.

Leaving the letter on her desk, she rushed out of her chamber to find Cullen, for the first time since their return. Bursting through the door of Cullen's office, she was stunned to find a scout in his stead.

"Inquisitor. If you're looking for the Commander, he's gone to speak with Seeker Pentaghast." Her heart sank as soon as she heard the scout's words. Cullen and Eostre had barely spoken since she returned from the fade.

Eostre sprinted out of the office and toward the armoury, hoping that she wasn't too late to prevent what was happening. Upon opening the door to the armoury, she found Cullen and Cassandra locked in a battle of wills.

Her entrance drew Cullen's attention, his heart breaking at the very sight of Eostre. She had returned to him from the Fade, but the idea of losing her for the second time had become far too much for him to bare. "Forgive me." He muttered as he passed Eostre, his head hung low.

"And people say I'm stubborn. This is ridiculous!" Cassandra's voice tore Eostre's attention from Cullen's departure. "Cullen told you that he's no longer taking lyrium."

"Yes," Eostre sighed, her heart heavy. "It seemed very important to him."

"It's not a decision to be made lightly but now," Cassandra hesitated. She had been in the Fade with Eostre and see the returned memories, and how they had changed her.

"Cullen has asked that I recommend a replacement for him." She was greeted by the wide-eyed stare of Eostre, "I refused, it is not necessary. Besides, it would destroy him. He's come so far."

"Why didn't he come to me?" Eostre's heart became even heavier.

"We had an agreement long before you joined us. As a seeker, I could evaluate the dangers. "And he wouldn't want to risk your … disappointment." Cassandra knew of the kiss between Eostre and Cullen. She had seen Cullen's reaction to Eostre falling into the fade.

"Is there anything we can do to change his mind?" The desperation in Eostre's voice was more evident than ever. If she was to lose Cullen, there wouldn't be much left for her.

"If anyone could, it's you." Cassandra rested a sympathetic hand on Eostre's shoulder. "Mages have made their suffering known, but templars never have. They are bound to the order mind and soul, with someone always holding their lyrium leash."

"Cullen has a chance to break that leash, to prove to himself – and anyone who would follow suit – that it's possible." Cassandra ensured to lock eyes with Eostre. "He can do this; I knew that when we met in Kirkwall. Talk to him. Decide if now is the time."

Cullen leaned over the box of lyrium on his desk, anger filling him. He yelled, throwing the box towards the now opened door, narrowly missing Eostre as she walked through.

"Maker's breath! I didn't hear you enter. I-Forgive me." He turned away from her, not wanting to subject her to his suffering.

"Cullen, if you need to talk. I am here for you."

"You don't have to-" Cullen let out a pained grown, holding onto the edge of his desk for support. Eostre approached him, but he gestured for her to stay back. He didn't want to appear weak, especially in front of the woman he loved.

"I never meant for this to interfere."

"Are you going to be alright?" Eostre's voice was almost breaking as she spoke. Her heart was breaking to see him like this, especially as there was nothing, she could do to lessen it.

"Yes, I don't know."

"You asked what happened to Ferelden's circle." All of Cullen's pain and suffering was now evident in his face. Reliving these memories were becoming far too painful for him to bare.

"It was taken over by abominations. The Templars - my friends – were slaughtered. I was tortured. They tried to break my mind, and I – How can you be the same person after that?" He turned away from her, looking out of the window. The memories were once again fresh in his mind.

"Still, I wanted to serve. They sent me to Kirkwall. I trusted my Knight-Commander, and for what? Her fear of mages ended in madness. Kirkwall's circle fell. Innocent people died in the streets. Can't you see why I want nothing to do with that life?"

Eostre reached her hand out towards Cullen, in an attempt to console him. "Of course I can. I-"

"Don't! You should be questioning what I've done!" He began to pace, the memories overwhelming him with anger and discomfort. "I thought this would be better – that I would regain some control over my life. But these thoughts won't leave me…."

"How many lives depend on our success? I swore myself to this cause. I will not give less to the inquisition than I did to the chantry. I should be taking it; I should be taking it."

Cullen swung his fist, punching the bookcase in anguish. Placing a soft, delicate hand on his cheek, Eostre turned his face to meet hers. In her eyes, all he could see was love and compassion.

"This doesn't have to be about the inquisition, is this what you want?" Her words were spoken so tenderly, easing some of the pain that he felt. He slipped his arms around her waist, pulling her close to him. Gently, he put his forehead against hers.

"No." His voice was barely above a whisper. He scrunched his eyes shut. "But these memories have always haunted me – if they become worse, if I cannot endure this…"

"You can." She replied in hushed tones, now both her hands on his cheeks. "You are not alone in this Cullen. I will stand by you."