Later that night they were laying in bed, and Killian pulled Emma closer to him and breathed her in. "Love? Would you like to do something for our anniversary in a couple weeks?" He asked softly, scared she'd say no.
She turned in his arms to face him, and gave him a soft smile. "Really? Of course, Killian, I'd love to."
"Aye.. My injuries are practically healed, and I should have my prosthetic feeling okay by then.. And well, being with you today made me miss taking you out and the life we used to have.." He shrugged.
"I actually think a date night might be really good for us, Babe. I'll ask Mary Margaret and David to watch Lottie, I feel like I ask Liam for too much help.." She ran her hand down his arm.
He nodded. "Liam doesn't mind, but I understand wanting to ask your brother. You've been really understanding about me wanting Liam's help lately."
She smiled softly. "I totally understand why you want him here, instead of David or Mary Margaret, or even any of our friends. He knows what you've been through better than anyone else, and I know he helped raise you, so it's just a natural thing." She kissed his cheek.
Killian turned her chin so he could kiss her properly. "Aye, Love. I'll make us a reservation for our anniversary. Can you believe we've been married for five years already?"
"I can't believe we got married five years ago. I can't even imagine what my life would be like right now if we had never run into each other that day we met." Emma gave him a soft smile. "I wouldn't have Charlotte, and I'd probably still be all alone.."
Killian smiled a little. "Aye, Love.. I probably wouldn't have survived my tour if I didn't have you and our baby to come home to. I hope you know I consider myself to be the luckiest man alive. I've got two beautiful girls I get to call mine."
"We're two very lucky girls, you know. You're a highly decorated Naval officer, and an amazing father and wonderful husband. I'm proud that I get to tell people I'm Captain Jones' wife." She shrugged.
That night, with Emma pressed against him, her hand resting lightly over his stump, Killian slept without a terrible nightmare for the first time since he got home. Emma woke up during the night, scared something had happened since he hadn't woken her up with his nightmares. When she realized he was sleeping soundly, she let herself relax and fall bask asleep.
A few weeks later, Killian got up early to get breakfast for Emma as a surprise for their anniversary. Although he had been relearning to cook, he decided to go to her favorite coffee shop down the street and get her a coffee and her favorite bear claw pastry. He easily made it home before she was up to start getting some work done, so he brought the food to her in bed.
Emma woke up when she felt the bed move, and his hand on her legs gently. "Babe?" She asked softly.
"Aye, Love.. It's me." He leaned down and kissed her forehead. "Happy Anniversary."
She reached for her glasses, and smiled when she saw the bag he had set on the bed. "Happy anniversary, Killian.. Is that for me?" She asked softly.
"Aye, Love.. I wanted to make breakfast for you, but I'm still not good at cooking.. So I went to get your favorite coffee, and a bear claw." He shrugged.
She leaned forward and kissed him softly. "Thank you, that was very sweet. Is Lottie awake yet?"
Killian settled against the headboard with her while she drank her coffee and took a bite of the pastry. "No, I looked in on her when I got back and she was still sleeping. It's still early, I just knew you had to go on a phone call for work this morning.."
She nodded. "I know.. I hate that I have this call today of all days, but I know it's better than me having to go into the office all day."
He shrugged. "You have to work. You love what you do, and I'd never ask you to give that up for me. And you're bloody amazing at your job."
She kissed his cheek. "Thank you. I got you a present, but I want to give it to you tonight. Is that alright?"
"Of course, Love.. You didn't have to get me anything, you're here and willing to do anything just to make sure I'm comfortable and handling everything well.." He wrapped his arm around her as she ate.
They heard Charlotte making noise over the baby monitor, and Emma sighed when she saw the time.
"Damn. I wanted to spend time with her, but I need to get ready for my phone call." She muttered.
"It's alright, I'll get Lottie, and I'll get her some cheerios to eat, I know we just bought a new box a couple of days ago. Do your work, Love, we'll be here when you're finished. We can spend time with her then." He assured her, kissing her softly.
She nodded and kissed him deeply. "Happy five years, KJ, I love you so much. Thank you for being such an amazing husband and father."
"I love you too, Emma." Killian couldn't help but smile as he went to the nursery to get Charlotte from her bed. "Good morning, Little Love." He kissed her cheek. "Let's go get some juice and some cheerios, aye?"
She was still half asleep and laid her head on his shoulder, holding onto his shirt. "O's."
Killian loved when she was so cuddly with him, letting him hold her. He got her breakfast and settled with her to eat. She didn't want to sit in her highchair so he let her stay on his lap while she tiredly munched on her breakfast.
Emma came into the kitchen and gave Charlotte a brief good morning kiss before she headed to the other room so she could get her work done. Killian spent the morning playing in the living room with Charlotte before the three of them took a picnic lunch down near the water and ate together.
Killian was glad he and Emma got to spend their anniversary with their baby girl before taking her over to Mary Margaret and David's for the night. David answered the door and let them into the house.
"It's good to see you guys, you look like you're feeling well, Killian." David clapped his shoulder.
"Aye, I am, thank you, mate." He smiled. "Thank you for letting Charlotte stay with you all tonight. It means a lot to me."
"Of course, Killian." Mary Margaret hugged him tightly. "It's our pleasure. After everything you and Emma have been through lately, you deserve to have a nice night out together without worrying about anyone else."
He nodded, and wrapped his bad arm around Emma's waist. He hadn't had the prosthetic for long, and was still nervous about people bringing attention to it. Emma simply leaned against him, and smiled at him.
"It'll definitely be nice, we haven't been on a date since the night before he was deployed.. I never thought I'd get to celebrate our five years together, with you here, Killian."
David smiled a little, bouncing Charlotte on his hip gently. "Well, we'll call if we need you. Enjoy yourselves, and take your time coming to get her in the morning. I'm covering a night shift tomorrow at the precinct, so I can stay with her as long as you need in the morning.."
Emma nodded. "Thank you, David. We appreciate you both taking her for us, she adores you and she's very excited to be here.."
Mary Margaret took Charlotte's bag from Killian and shooed them to the door. "Get going, you two. Have fun, and if you need anything from us or want to talk to Charlotte, just call."
Killian let go of Emma long enough to press one last kiss to Charlotte's cheek and rub her back. "Bye, Lottie. I love you." He whispered.
Other than during his doctors appointments this was the first time he was going to be away from her for an extended time since he got back. Emma knew he was going to miss her, so once they were in the car, she waited a minute, her hand squeezing his leg gently.
"I know you miss her.. She's become your buddy in the last couple months." Emma said softly.
"Aye, she has.. I miss her already, but getting to have time alone with you without a baby to distract us is also something that is really good for our relationship." He said softly.
She gave him a gentle smile. "Can I kiss you before we go home to get ready?" Emma asked, she knew sometimes he needed her to ask before she initiated anything.
Killian nodded, and leaned into her, kissing her softly for a moment. "I love you, Swan."
"I love you too." She smiled, giving him one last quick kiss before driving them home.
Killian wore a dress shirt and waistcoat like he always used to, but kept his sleeves down so that he didn't draw too much attention to his prosthetic. When Emma came out of the bedroom to where Killian was waiting in the living room, he was speechless.
"Bloody hell, Emma. You're.." He rubbed his hand over his face.
Emma smiled a little, blushing slightly. "Thank you, Killian. You don't look so bad yourself. I've missed seeing you in a waistcoat." She stepped up close to him and ran her hand down his chest.
He kissed her forehead, so he didn't mess up her lipstick before their night even started. "Thank you, Love. I hope you like the restaurant I picked, it's that little Italian place we went to on our first date.."
Since he still wasn't driving, Killian couldn't keep the entire night a surprise for Emma like he used to. Emma's eyes lit up when she heard where he wanted to take her, and Killian rested his hand on her waist.
She pulled away briefly to get his gift from the end table. "If it's okay, I want to give you this now?"
"Aye, Love.." He sat with her on the couch, and pulled her gift from his pocket. "Um, I might need help with the wrapping paper though.." He sighed.
"Fuck. Killian, I should've wrapped it differently, I'm sorry, I didn't think about it." She frowned. "Of course I'll help you."
"It's alright, we're still getting used to this.. You go first, Love.. It's nothing special.." He shrugged, he was downplaying it so he wouldn't be upset if she didn't like it.
Emma unwrapped it, and opened the box to find a charm, but before Emma could ask what exactly it was, Killian jumped in.
"I know you still wear my tags.. Even now, with this gorgeous dress you never seem to want to take them off.." He fingered the tags around her neck gently. "Well, that one is for you to add to it.. It's not an official one or anything, but it's got Lottie's initials and birthday and.. Well, I thought it'd be nice for you to add, so you'd have both of us close.."
He knew he was rambling, but Emma touched his cheek. "I love it, Killian, really. It's perfect, and it only makes sense that I add something for her. Thank you, Baby."
She took the chain off and slipped the new charm onto it before putting it back around her neck, holding the tags for a moment. She helped him unwrap his present, and helped him open the small box.
Killian shook his head when he saw the ring inside. "Swan.. Emma, is it.." He looked up at her.
"I know you lost your wedding ring, and that you can't wear it on your left hand anymore.. But I know you hate that you don't have that ring, and that you liked having a symbol of how much I love you, so I thought you'd like to have a new one for your right hand, even if it's not the same."
He had tears in his eyes. "Thank you." He hugged her tightly. "Will you put it on me?" He asked softly.
"Of course, Killian. It's my honor. I almost forgot, but I had an inscription put on the inside.. With our anniversary, and my initials.. Just a little something." She showed it to him before she slid the ring onto his finger, and pressed a kiss just above it.
Killian gave her a teary smile and Emma hugged him for a long moment. The two of them headed to the restaurant, and got settled at their table. Emma knew Killian was nervous about being at such a nice restaurant with his prosthetic.
Emma sat in the chair closest to him, and took his left hand onto her lap while they waited for their food. She told him about the work she'd been doing, and just about anything she could think of as Killian listened, a proud smile on his face.
"You know, I'm really proud of you, Killian.." She squeezed his arm just above the prosthetic. "I know that there's still a lot going on, and you're adjusting.. But, you work so hard with your physical therapy, and being a father.." She smiled at him.
He shrugged a little. "I just want to be the man you and Lottie need, the one you deserve. I'm not the same man you married, Swan, but I hope that I'm still enough."
Emma brushed her fingers over his cheek so he'd meet her eyes. "You're more than enough, for both of us. As long as you're here, and you don't pull away from me, that won't change. And I know that there are parts of you that are still the Killian I fell in love with.." She assured him.
"Your heart, the amount of love you show me and Charlotte whenever you can.. The way you look at me when you think I can't see.. I know that you're not the exact same person, but neither am I.." She shrugged.
He nodded. "I'm not going anywhere, not anymore. Once I'm officially removed from active duty, I'm never leaving my girls again. I love you, Emma, I always will." He pressed a kiss to her palm.
She simply smiled at him. They ate their dinner, chatting about anything they could think of, often coming back to Charlotte. Killian loved to talk about his daughter, the smile never leaving his face as he did.
Once they'd finished, Killian paid their bill and they took a short walk along the water near the restaurant. Emma tugged his arm around her shoulders, leaning into him as they walked.
"Thank you for this, Killian.. I'm really happy that you wanted to take me out, get all dressed up.. You look very sexy tonight, you made me feel sexy tonight." She admitted.
Killian smiled. "Of course, my love. Anything I can do to make you happy, I'll do. And you always look sexy, this dress is killing me right now, but you're also sexy in your pajamas and glasses, with our baby on your hip."
She stopped them, pulling him to her by his lapels. She kissed him hungrily, wanting to be closer to him than she could at that moment. "Take me home, Killian. I want to keep kissing you, but not here."
He pulled back, his hands resting on her hips, holding her against him. "Bloody hell.. Yes." He breathed against her skin.
Emma drove them home, and once their door was closed, Emma was pressed against it. Killian kissed her for a moment before trailing his kisses down her neck. She wrapped her arms around his neck.
"Take me to bed, Killian." She whispered.
Killian lifted her up, his strength had begun to come back, and her legs came around his waist as he followed her instruction, Emma's lips trailing over his exposed skin as he walked.
The next morning, Killian woke up to Emma's hair practically in his mouth and her limbs draped over him. She was sound asleep, a smile on her face. She looked truly carefree for the first time since Killian had been home. She was relaxed, and Killian wished he could make sure she stayed that way forever.
Emma woke up slowly, cuddling further into the warmth he provided. "Stop thinking so loud." She groaned.
Killian chuckled softly, moving her hair off him. "Apologies, Love. I didn't mean to wake you. I was just thinking about how perfect last night was.."
She rested her chin on his chest so she could see him. "I've missed being able to wake up to those baby blues sparkling at me." She grinned. "Let's make breakfast, and then go pick up our girl?"
"I'd love that." He leaned down and kissed her softly.
Emma grabbed Killian's discarded button-down and her glasses before heading to the kitchen. Killian helped Emma make breakfast as best he could, but he mostly just stood there with a cup of coffee admiring his wife. He had been doing really well the last few days, without any flashbacks and fewer nightmares.
His therapy sessions had been helping him learn to deal with his anxieties, and the unpleasant feelings. When he'd been quiet for a while, Emma glanced up to make sure he was okay, and noticed he had his eyes closed and was breathing deeply.
"Baby?" Emma asked softly. "Kil?"
He flinched a little. "Sorry, Love.. I just.. I was feeling a little overwhelmed." His voice was hesitant.
"It's okay, I know that you can't really control when you start to feel like that, I'm not upset with you. I just wanted to check in on you." She poured herself some more coffee, and squeezed his arm gently.
He kissed her hair before taking their plates to the table. They ate in a comfortable silence, both of them content to simply be sitting next to the other. Killian wrapped his arm around Emma's chair when he'd finished, his fingers messing with the ends of her hair.
"I know we used to go out on dates and be away from Lottie, but I really miss her." Killian admitted.
"I miss her too. I always do when I'm not with her, she's such a dynamic little part of our lives." Emma smiled.
"Bloody hell, that's for sure, Love. I love being her dad, even if I did miss a lot of her milestones." He sighed. "You know, the more time I've spent with her lately, the more I realize just how much she's like you.."
"I see more of you in her, while you were gone.. The parts of her that are you, they made me happy. Even if you were gone, I knew you lived on through her." She laced their fingers together.
He squeezed her hand. "She's my princess." He said softly, running his thumb over the back of her hand. He was quiet for a moment before he spoke again. "Love?"
"Mhm?" Emma gave him a reassuring smile, she could tell that whatever he wanted to say was something big.
"Have you.. Would you.. Do you want more kids someday?" He spoke so quietly, if Emma hadn't been sitting so close she wouldn't have heard him.
"Oh.. I, well, I don't know, Killian.." She shrugged. "I mean, I'm happy with Lottie. But I know when we found out about Lottie, we talked about having more kids one day.. I just, I want us to be in a good place, and I want you to be in a good place."
He nodded. "I get it, I know we talked about having more kids, or adopting.. I loved having a brother growing up, and I know when you found David that it made all the difference, but.. I'm scared. Scared that I'll want it, and then I'll do something that causes me to lose everything. To lose all of you."
"You've only been home a few months, Babe. We have time to talk about it, and decide what we want. I want us to do what makes us happy, and what's best for our family.. Okay? Don't worry too much about it right now.."
He leaned in and kissed her. "Let's go get our baby. I miss her."
Emma pulled back and put their plates in the sink. She changed into a pair of leggings one of Killian's Navy shirts, one of her favorite things to wear when she wasn't at work.
When they got to David and Mary Margaret's, David was on their front porch with Charlotte on his hip as they watched their dog in the yard for a few minutes. The moment Charlotte spotted Killian she kicked her legs against David's side, pointing.
"Dada! Dada!" She had a huge grin on her face. "Mama!"
Killian chuckled softly. "Someone's happy to see us, Love."
Emma nodded. "I see that, she's going to injure my brother if you don't hurry up and get her." She teased with a smile.
Killian moved quickly, taking Charlotte into his arms and hugged her tightly. "Hello, Little Love. Did you have fun with Uncle David?"
Charlotte nodded. "Aye. Fun." She laid her head on his shoulder.
Emma shook her head with a chuckle at Charlotte's choice of words as she hugged her brother. "Thanks for watching her, David. I really appreciate it. Apparently she's more like Killian than I thought."
"Anytime, Em, she's a wonderful little girl. And she's definitely picked up some of the Jones brothers' vocabulary." He kissed her temple. "Did you two eat? I gave Charlotte some fruit, but Mary Margaret was finishing up some waffles and bacon just now if you want to stay.."
"We ate, but if I know my daughter, she's still hungry.. So, we can stay, if you want us to and it's okay?"
"We'd love it, come on in." David whistled for his dog and led them back into the house.
Killian and Emma spent a few hours just catching up with David and Mary Margaret. Killian held Charlotte on his lap as they talked, and at one point began to feel himself being pulled into a flashback and his anxiety.
He tried to calm himself down without scaring Charlotte, but Emma noticed the expression on his face and took her from him as a precaution. Charlotte began to whimper, wanting to be with Killian.
Charlotte could feel that Killian was upset and wanted to stay with him, so she started crying. Emma bounced her gently, torn between comforting her daughter and her husband. David could see her indecision and took Charlotte from her, rubbing soothing circles over her back.
"Shh.. Sweetie, you'll get back to your daddy in a minute.. It's okay." He whispered soft words in her ear as he held her.
"Killian? Take deep breaths.. Can I touch you?" Emma asked softly.
Killian nodded. "Aye, Love." He leaned into Emma's palm when she placed it against his cheek. "I'm fine, Swan.. It's okay."
Emma nodded. "I know, I know." She met his eyes, and smiled softly. "I took Lottie because I know you're scared you'll hurt her.. But she's upset, do you want me to bring her back?"
Killian nodded. "Please? I'm fine, and I don't want my baby girl to be upset."
David let Charlotte back into Killian's arms and she immediately buried her face in his shirt. She sniffled and Killian rubbed her back, cuddling her.
"Dada.. Sad..?" Charlotte asked softly after a few minutes when she had settled herself down.
"I'm okay, Princess. I love you so much." Killian hummed softly, hoping to stop her sniffles.
"Love you." She mumbled and Killian hugged her tighter.