"Galina," Dmitri gently scolded, squeezing his wife's shoulders as she inched past him to clean yet another already gleaming surface. "The coffee pot is cleaner than the day you took it out of the box. The countertops are practically sparkling. Sit down and enjoy the lull before the afternoon rush."

"I know, I know," Red said. Yet she still clutched her rag to her stomach, twisting the material into bunches. She rubbed a red raw hand over her jaw, surveying the market she loved so much. It was small, yes, and the roof leaked when it rained, but it was hers and she'd built it from the ground up. From being a fresh faced newly-wed with dreams that hadn't yet been crushed by a harsh reality to being run ragged with three toddlers under her feet, she had painstakingly given everything she had to her business. She reared three boys whilst chasing the American dream. And yes, despite the fact that there had been better and busier times, she was still proud of what she had made for herself.

"This isn't going to be too much for you, is it?" Dmitri inquired. His forehead creased and he reached out for her hand, which she offered up easily. Drawing circles in her palm, he looked at her. "Nicky would be okay if you changed your mind."

Red gave him a look that said it all. One arched eyebrow was it all took for Dmitri to relent.

"Okay, okay," he said, his acceptance peppered with a small chuckle. "I support you. But have you told the boys yet? They might not be as happy about it. I don't want them coming here and having an unwelcome surprise."

Red looked away. "They haven't phoned," she said defensively. "So I haven't had the chance. And Nicky would never be unwelcome here."

"You know the great thing about telephones," he said, raising his eyebrows. "They work both ways."

"I'll phone them tonight," Red said. "After Nicky's gone home. I don't want to take my eyes off her when she's here."

Dmitri's brow furrowed further. "She's never going to be alone, not even for a moment?"

"Not really," Red admitted, and when she'd heard of Marka's plan there had been an uneasy feeling in the pit of her stomach too. Yet there seemed little alternative. "In the mornings Marka will drop her at the day center, and in the afternoon she'll come here, to help out with the once Marka is finished at work she'll pick Nicky up and they'll go home."

"Sounds like Mrs Nichols will be rushed off her feet," Dmitri remarked. "I hope she can cope."

"I hope Nicky can," Red said honestly.

Before she could elaborate, the bell above the door sounded and a flustered looking Marka rushed through the door.

"Mrs Nichols," Red said in surprise. "I didn't expect you here so soon. Did I get my wires crossed?" She crossed the room to meet the woman. "Is Nicky okay?"

"She's fine," Marka replied breathlessly. "I dropped her off at the day center, but I didn't realize there had to be an approved list for pick ups. They need your name, address and ID," she said, her tone apologetic. "I'm sorry, I should have realized. I should have checked."

"Don't worry about it," Red said, her brow creasing. "It's been such a quick turn around to get Nicky into this center I would be more surprised if you hadn't missed something. You did well for it to only be something small."

Marka looked up and blinked. "Thank you," she said after a beat. "I never know if I'm doing the right thing with Nicky. She would never say so...but it's nice to hear. I'm sorry again for asking you to do this. I know I showed up out of the blue and normally I never would, but a place just opened up and I had to accept that night or someone else would have snapped it up...you know how these places can be."

Red didn't. It was a foreign concept to her, but she smiled anyway. Whilst she didn't understand the trials and tribulations of rehabs, she did understand those of being a mother, and especially of feeling like she was alone.

She'd had Dmitri, of course, when her boys were young, but despite his good intentions he still believed that babies and children were more women's work than anything else. If he picked up a baby and he didn't stop crying after three bounces he would flounder and refer back to his wife.

Red would have been more annoyed had he been intentionally useless, and besides, secretly she enjoyed being the only one able to settle her baby if he was distressed. She was the one who could make it all better. The only one. It was often impractical but she loved it nonetheless. Right now, though, she could see Marka was far from loving the situation at hand and despite not particularly liking the woman, couldn't help but feel sorry for her. All the money in the world couldn't save Nicky

from herself.

"Are you sure I can't send a driver over when you pick up Nicky? I don't want to put you out more than necessary."

"No, we'll be fine," Red confirmed.

She paused for a moment, considering whether she should say something further or just nod and let the woman be on her way. Dmitri's eyes played ping pong from one woman to the other, but he stayed quiet.

"Stay for a coffee," she offered after a beat, side stepping to get behind the counter. "It's so early; you must be exhausted. You could tell me how the drop off went." Her voice rose hopefully.

Marka hesitated. In her face, Red could see Nicky; the slight downward quirk of her lips, the way her eyes crinkled..she opened her mouth and for a moment, Red believed she was going to say yes. Her hand inched toward the pot.

Then the bell above the door jangled again, signalling the arrival of a customer, and the moment passed before it had really begun. Marka's eyes lingered on Red for a moment longer, and then she shook her head.

"I'd better get going," she said softly. "I've already taken too much time off. Thank you for doing this though, Galina...you have no idea how much weight it's taken off my shoulders." She cleared her throat and it was like a wall was put up before Red's eyes. "Please don't forget your ID when you pick Nicky up."

Red managed a smile. "It's no problem," she said, trying hard to stop her voice from catching. "Nicky's very special to me. Managing this would be impossible alone. And I won't."

Marka swallowed hard and nodded quickly. And with that, she disappeared out into the busy street, out of Red's view.

Red watched the crowd for a moment before turning back to Dmitri. "I should find my ID," she said fretfully. "Last time I saw it, it was in the cabinet. What if someone has moved it and I can't find it later? I hate to think of Nicky waiting for me and-"

"Galina," Dmitri said, "I haven't moved it and the boys moved out years ago. Why would it not be there?" He turned to the customer, who was still poring over the menu. "Could I get you anything, sir?"

Red seemed to snap to attention then. "Sorry," she said, shaking her head quickly. "Could I interest you in the specials of the day?"

Later that afternoon, Red waited in the reception of an upscale building on the other side of town. It had taken a few moments to work up the nerve to go in. In her haste to see Nicky she hadn't even changed out of the day's clothes and self-consciously smoothed down the hem of her grease stained skirt. She'd arrived a little early and whilst the secretary had offered her a tea or coffee, she had preferred to simply take in what was happening around her.

After what seemed like an endless wait, Nicky appeared in the doorway. The soft tap of her crutches preceded her and Red looked up expectantly.

"How was it?" Red murmured as they exited through double doors. She glanced over at Nicky, who looked downcast. "I didn't know what I was expecting, but it looked nice. A lot less formal than Riverside, don't you think?"

Nicky shrugged. "It was fine."

"You didn't like it?" Red asked. She breathed in the fresh air as they walked; even if the center wasn't a hospital, it still had that distinct smell to it. She was glad to be out of it. It always made her shudder. "The secretary was sweet."

Nicky let out a sigh. "It was fine, like I said...it's just not for me. Those centers are for people who can't take care of themselves, people with disabilities and illnesses. People who need supervision." She gave Red a sidewards glance. "I'm not like them."

Red hummed. "Some people argue addiction is a disease," she said gently. "And maybe for now, you do need someone with you."

Nicky looked away. Arguing with Red wasn't how she wanted to spend her afternoon, so she didn't press the issue. "Marka couldn't even wait till my leg healed," she grumbled. "I can't even do the sports activities. I have to sit and do nothing or worse, join in with the crafts."

"She didn't want you to miss out," Red said diplomatically, hiding a smile at Nicky's attitude. "These places are hard to come by."

"She never wants me to miss out," Nicky shot back. "That's why she had me signed up for Pre-K before I was even born. Sometimes," she said quietly, her crutches clacking between them, "I think missing out would be an okay thing."

Red offered Nicky a sympathetic smile but didn't comment on Marka. It didn't feel fair. "What crafts did you do?" she asked instead.

Nicky shrugged again and came to a stop, wincing as she did so. "I'll show you if I ever finish it. Is it much further to walk?"

Red's brow furrowed and she instantly took hold of Nicky's elbow. "Not much further," she promised. "Just down this street. Are you in pain? Do you need to sit down?"

Through gritted teeth, Nicky said, "I'm okay."

"I should have accepted your mother's offer of a driver," she said, feeling guilty. "Should I call her to send one?"

"No," Nicky said quickly. She hobbled over to a bench a few paces away. "I'm okay, really. I just need to sit down for a minute."

Red followed her over and sat beside her. She ran her fingers through Nicky's hair, and the younger woman leaned into the touch. "You okay?"

Nicky shook out her hair. "Yeah."

"What are you thinking?"

"I'm thinking that I want a coffee from that shop over there." She nodded toward a small, independent coffee shop on the other side of the street. Rain was beginning to drizzle above them and the call of the soft mood lighting emitting a golden glow was too much to resist.

"We have coffee at home," Red said without thinking. "I mean, my house. Or the market. It's so expensive in those stores."

"Don't you want a chocolate chip muffin?" Nicky teased. "My treat, obviously."

Red didn't comment that it was actually Marka's treat. "Only for a little while," she agreed. "Until the next bus comes along, okay?"

Nestled in a private booth in the back of the store, Red smiled at Nicky. "Maybe you could use this time to take a few courses, or figure out where you want to go after all this is over," she said. "You don't want to be reliant on Marka your whole life," she continued, stirring a packet of sugar into her coffee. "What do you want to do with your life?"

"I want to work with you, in the restaurant," Nicky said without hesitation. "I was good at doing that, wasn't I?"

"You don't want to work there forever," Red replied gently. "It's not good pay and it can be back breaking work."

Nicky's brow furrowed as she scooped up the cream on top of her coffee with her finger. "You seem to like it. Don't you want me working with you?"

"It was my dream," Red explained. "So it made it worth it. And honey, I would love to work with you. But you have to find something that makes you want to get up in the morning."

Nicky raised her eyebrows. "What about Dmitri?"

Red sipped her coffee. "Well, his dream was to be with me," she said, rolling her eyes. "You need to find out what your dream is. What did you do before...well, you know. Before you fell into the wrong crowd."

"I didn't do much," Nicky said honestly. "I was only seventeen when I tried heroin for the first time."

Red reeled from what Nicky had just said. When her boys were seventeen, they were picking out colleges. But then they knew they would have to work for a living, and to survive; Nicky knew that no matter what, she had her mother's financial security. When you have everything, what do you aim for? She mulled it over for a few moments, a comfortable silence settling between them, before she spoke.

"I know you're trying," she said, her voice breaking. "But you need to understand how fucking scary it is to see your child lying in a hospital bed. To not know if they're coming home when they say goodbye."

"I know," Nicky said, her own voice hoarse. She cleared her throat. "I know."

Red gave a wan smile. "No, you don't. Not until you have children of your own."

Nicky looked down at the table. "I'm sorry."

"I know," Red returned.

Nicky shook her head this time. "No, you don't. Not until you fuck up this badly. Again and again and again…"

Red let out a little sigh. "Trust me, I have. Worse than you have." She looked up and saw a bus beginning to pull up. She nodded towards it, thankful that the conversation had been cut short. "We'd better get going. Don't want to be here all night, do we?"

"Dunno. Sounds kinda nice, if you ask me."

Red rolled her eyes. "Come on."

The bell jangled above the door as Nicky and Red walked through the door. The first thing Red noticed was the sign had been changed to closed. Her face like thunder, as soon as she walked in she demanded, "I want to know why you've shut up shop!"

Dmitri cleared his throat and as his wife stepped through the door she noticed her son sitting with his father by the window.

"Vasily," she said in surprise. "I didn't expect to see you this afternoon." There was a guiltiness in her tone that wasn't lost on anyone in the room. She touched Nicky's arm. "I meant to tell you that Nicky was spending the afternoons here for the foreseeable...I just haven't spoken to you in a while."

"Yeah. Dad filled me in," he said flatly.

"How have you been?" Red asked, helping Nicky settle down in a chair and then rushing over to her son. She wouldn't usually have entertained coddling him. Yet the last time Nicky and he had met, she'd had a total radio silence for weeks. She hated to think of that happening again. He hadn't done it to hurt her, she knew that, yet it had caused immeasurable pain. "I could get you a plate, you look so thin-"

"Could I speak to Nicky alone please, Ma?" Vasily asked. He looked up at his mother, his mouth set in a hard line. Despite his evident annoyance, Nicky couldn't help but note how respectfully he spoke to her.

"I'm not sure," Red hedged. "I'm not really supposed to leave her alone…"

Nicky straightened. "It's okay, Red," she said softly. If she noticed how Vasily flinched at the nickname, she didn't show it. "It's not like I'd really be alone. If Vasily wants to talk in private I think he deserves that."

Red hovered nonetheless, despite Dmitri's hand on her arm. "If you're sure."

"I am," she said confidently. She raised her eyebrows as Red stayed exactly where she was. After another few seconds of staring, she forced her feet to shuffle out to the back room. If she would have had a glass, she would have pressed it up against the wall.

"Aren't you a little old to need a babysitter?" Vasily asked, rolling his eyes. He slid onto a bar stool at the counter and took a bite from a pastry he'd taken from behind the glass display case.

Watching from her seat across the room, Nicky tilted her head. "Aren't you a little old to be jealous of your mommy spending time with someone else?"

Vasily crossed his arms. "I'm not jealous."

"Why are you sulking then?" she retorted. "I don't understand why you're giving me such a hard time here. It's not like you're around that much anyway."

"There's a reason for that," he returned.

Nicky pressed her lips together. It was hard to fight the urge to defend Red at all costs, deny that she could ever do any wrong...but she simply looked at him and waited for him to continue.

"Tricia almost killed her."

"I know," Nicky said quietly. A lot of home truths were being thrown at her today and if she was finding it hard to swallow, she didn't want it to show.

"I don't think you understand," Vasily pressed on. "She was here for two years. Ma took her in from the street, I don't even know where she finds you guys. I haven't even seen a stray cat yet she finds you two." He heaved a sigh. "She was like a sister to me. I really think Mama loved her like a daughter." His voice was softer than it had been and he closed his eyes for a moment. "No, that's not true. She was a daughter to her. She loved her just as much as all of us. And yeah...maybe I was a little jealous back then."

Nicky's hard expression softened a little. "I think anyone would have been."

"I should have been nicer to her," he admitted. "I should have taken more time to tell her how much she meant to me."

Nicky watched him. "You couldn't have known."

"Why not?" he asked. "It was written on the wall back then and it is now. Ma's doing it again. She loves you, you know. Maybe you don't love her back, I don't know, but if anything happened to you…" he frowned, unable to complete his thought. "I don't think she would be able to bounce back from that."

"Listen, Vasily...I know you don't like me, but I would never-"

"It's not that I don't like you, Nicky," he said, exasperated. "I like you just fine. In any other circumstances I'm sure we'd get along great…" he rubbed his hand along his jaw. "But I don't want to lose another sister either."

Nicky swallowed hard. Red was the single strongest person she knew and she believed Vasily wholeheartedly; losing Tricia almost broke her completely. If she took it that hard, she hated to think how three young men who lost their little sister must have felt.

"I couldn't even bear to see Mama after the funeral...she looked so lost, all of the time. And then…"

"Then?" Nicky prompted gently.

"Then she found you."

Nicky felt like it was all clicking into place.

"And it was like a switch was flipped. She still missed Tricia, obviously...we all do. But she had you to focus on. She had to look after you. She was like her old self again."

Nicky looked down. "And you wondered why you weren't enough," she finished for him.

He nodded. "That sounds terrible, doesn't it? I know it does. I'm happy she's happy again, I am...but what happens next?"

"She loves you and your brothers more than anything," Nicky said. And she meant it. "She tells me an anecdote about you guys whenever we do something. You were enough, Vasily...you were enough." She looked to the floor. If she was familiar with any feeling, it was inadequacy. To her surprise, tears sprung to her eyes. She forced them away with a couple of blinks.

"Well now she loves you too," he said, and he couldn't have sounded less enthusiastic about it. "So you have to keep yourself healthy. You have to keep up with whatever you're doing and stay sober," he implored her. He looked her up and down, finally noticing her leg. "What happened?"

Nicky debated lying, but she was sure Red would tell him eventually. "I fell off a roof," she said reluctantly. "Accidentally."

He looked heavenward. "You have to take care of yourself," he told her. "For yourself and for Ma. Okay? Will you do that?"

"I'm trying," Nicky admitted. "I never want to hurt your mom," she said softly. "It's the last thing I want to do. I'm sorry if you think that, but…" she hesitated, and wondered if she really wanted to admit it to herself. "I love her too, you know."

"I believe you." He nodded and for the first time since Nicky met him, she saw the flicker of a smile on his lips. "For God's sake, though; stay away from high rises, will you?"

A/N: Thank you for reading. To everyone who reviewed the last chapter, thank you. I'm sorry this update took so long - life has been a bit crazy and stressful as I'm sure it is for all of you...hope you're all doing well.

- Star xo