A/N (1) Previously on Chuck versus The Journey: Chuck and Sarah, as the newlywed Carmichaels, attend a posh dinner at a Santa Monica hotel. They join the Governor of California and his family, trying to find out if anyone of them is involved in the a-bomb threat they are investigating. Later in the evening, they are asked by the Governor to tell the story of how they met and, on the fly, made that story up. This chapter is the second half of it.

I'm not the kind to play for fun,
I only play for keeps, and I'm keeping all the love I won.
Finders, keepers, losers, weepers,
The loser has to pay the score,
He lost you and I found you,
And I'm keeping you forevermore.
"Finders Keepers, Losers Weepers" (Dory & Ollie Jones)

Chapter 11: Chuck & Sarah vs. The River

Chuck walked a highwire. To fail and fall would be disastrous. He had rushed onto the rope with boyish enthusiasm. But now that he was out there, far away from either start or end, he realized how dangerous his act was. One false step, one insecurity, and he would tumble down into his doom. Below him was a meaningless life of loneliness. Behind him, where he started, was Agent Walker. In front of him, where he wanted to arrive safely, was Sarah. The rope between the two incarnations of the woman he loved was the cover story they currently created, delicately weaving some truths and honest declarations into it, whose full meaning was only accessible to them.

"Guess who comes along next! It was my boyfriend Bruce and Charles's fianceé Jill. They had met as well. Bruce invited Charles and her to spend the evening at our campfire," Sarah explained next.

She wiggled her head in the wisdom of hindsight. "I should have been alarmed that Bruce invited someone, but I wasn't. I was thrilled to know that I'd be seeing Charles again later, and I had a truly bad conscience as I knew I shouldn't have been so happy about it."

"And, Charles, were you happy too?" Gene asked.

"Happy? I didn't have time to be happy as I had men's work to do. The most valuable victim of her totally failed blow at the flies – I'm sorry, Honeybee, I can't put it in any other way –, was Samantha's mobile, and I had to fix it."

"So you met and were drawn to each other when both of you were with someone else," Robert's fiancée Ginger mused. "How did you fall in love, then?"

Sarah aimed to step up the pace, so she answered immediately.

"Charles is very handy…" - she made a meaningful pause, giving him a Can't-wait-for-you-to-do-it-again look that sent not only his fantasy into overdrive - "...with computers and phones and all kinds of devices…" she started but trailed off, giving him an encouraging look out of the corner of her eye.

"She watched me fix that mobile while we made small talk-"

Sarah interrupted him.

"I looked at him and thought, well, this is a cute fellow, and I guess my whole demeanor expressed that…"

Chuck grasped what she was doing.

"I was lucky I could fix that phone as I was stupidly nervous…"

"How he worked his skillful hands on my phone… it was like a metaphor…"

"I thought, wow, what's happening? Those eyes, so alive, so blue, so open, and if I hadn't thought it impossible, it seemed all about me…"

"I liked those wild curls, how sweet and funny he was, passionate and thoughtful, a big caring heart evident in everything he spoke…"

"I had a hunch, I mean, a very few times in your days, you get that absolute certainty inside yourself about the rest of your life…"

"I fell for him between collecting those vegetables from the ground and fixing my phone…"

"The most gorgeous creature on the planet was standing right next to me. But we both were taken. Nothing happened, and nothing would have happened. We're not built that way."

They stopped as if on cue, almost breathless from the fast-paced dialog. Chuck was afraid to look into Sarah's eyes. The story was faked, but the emotions he had expressed were painfully honest. If he searched her gaze now and would find nothing but professional coolness, he didn't know if he could keep the show going. But there was no use in delaying the inevitable. He risked a glance and thought somebody had pulled the chair from under him.

The tenderness in Sarah's face was overwhelming. She was fighting with her emotions like he was.

The rope for his balancing act was more durable than ever, and he cautiously but firmly moved forward, step by step.

"So, you ain't built that way," Gene Kowalski began. "How come you're sitting here?"

The tender bubble burst. For a short while, she had been in an artificially created world that knew no killing, where all the knives she owned were safely stored in the kitchen, and where her past was free of ghastly memories that came back to haunt her. Sarah took a deep breath.

"We were lucky that others didn't have such scruples. Bruce and Jill disappeared from the campfire with, as I know in hindsight, a weak excuse. I mean, on the very first night, and it was not that they were single and free!"

Nobody said a word, so Chuck continued.

"We two had a pleasant conversation at the campfire, but we didn't flirt."

He apologizingly grinned at Sarah. "Not much."

She shook her head in deep thought, trying to immerse herself into the tale and so shaking off those dark thoughts of days gone by that plagued her. "Hmm-mm. It was harmless. It was… I don't know."

Chuck helped her out.

"There was a tension between us, a flow of energy. You might say we… bordered on flirting because the draw between us was so strong, but we certainly didn't... didn't…"

"…play with fire. We respected each other's commitments. It was after 15 or 20 minutes when I wondered how long it would take to bring a few beers and went to check what had kept them."

Everyone knew what was coming, yet everyone gaped at Sarah in anticipation.

"I found them in our tent. How to put it… there was nothing to misunderstand about the situation."

Sarah could elaborate on Bryce/Bruce, but she began to wonder where all this was leading. I am sketching out a life that finds me happy but without my job. Those tempting dreams about the Carmichaels had one grave problem: It was a life without the CIA, where Agent Walker had no place. But she loved to be Agent Walker.

"Ouch," Ginger exclaimed.

"I was shattered. I thought Bruce and I had something good going. Strangely, I felt even more hurt, as I had a crush for another man, but I had nothing to blame myself - I didn't act on it."

Sarah had a painful look on her face.

"When I freaked out, Bruce told me that he would like us to stay together, but he just can't help himself. That's when I found out that Jill wasn't the first."

She gulped. Chuck was about to admire her acting skills when that hitch in her voice made him wait and watch. She was fighting with the memory, but was it Samantha, or was it Sarah? And if it was Sarah - what memory?

"So, what came next? Revenge sex? With a certain fellow at hand?" Gene grinned.

"It never crossed my mind, Gene, honestly. Bruce… he was… I see it now. It seems so ridiculous what I hoped… he had been a lifeline for me…"

Did she actually struggle with words, or was it part of the act?

"I… I didn't have it too easy in my life."

That definitely wasn't necessary to sell our story, Chuck thought. What is going on?

"Bruce was handsome, charming, courting me… the life he offered seemed so exciting, so promising…"

Sarah looked at Chuck, an expression on her face that was…

…that was… it can't be… what is she saying… is she telling me something through the fairytale we weave…?

"… but I am not sold on muscles, fortune, or power… like, I would not object to Charles being a millionaire, but I really don't care if he is… I would take these things as a bonus if he is the right man for me. I had wished Bruce to be a man I could trust… I know now he isn't, and I am a lucky girl to have found someone."

Holy Order of the Jedi, Chuck thought, is she explaining to me that Bryce was a mistake? Does she want to put me at ease about his presence in her life now?

Sarah audibly breathed out through her nose.

"Finally seeing who Bruce really was, I told him in a choice of words not suitable for tonight that it was over. Then I stomped off, down to the water, sat by the river, and added my tears to it."

Chuck forced himself to retake command of the storyline.

"I heard the commotion and walked over, and, from afar, I saw enough. My world collapsed. I couldn't bother to get closer, and I never broke up with Jill, well, formally. There was nothing left to say, to stress a cliché. I retreated to what was now my tent alone and tried hard not to fall apart."

"Did the other two ever try to talk about it?" the Governor asked, intrigued.

Sarah snorted. "No, they didn't. The case was closed as far as they were concerned. The next morning they were gone. Looking back, I have to be thankful that they cheated on us because that gave me this most wonderful man."

She reached over and gingerly put her fingers on Chuck's cheek. He grinned that lopsided grin that she only saw when he was genuinely stoked about something.

"So, how did that happen?" Ginger asked eagerly. Chuck pushed the story forward.

"It took me only a few moments to accept that there was someone else who had been cheated too. I peeked out of my tent and saw Samantha sitting by the river and thought I heard her sniffle."

Sarah cheerfully shook her head and indicated the smallest of eye rolls.

"That wasn't me, that was possibly a squirrel sniffing for something edible. Because I cried. I outright cried a river at the river."

Sarah saw Chuck being touched by the faked memory. If we continue much longer, I believe it myself, she thought. It would be so lovely if our story were true and if we were a happy couple. I wouldn't have such an ugly past. But would it still be me? As much as I hate it, didn't my past form the woman I am today – the woman Chuck is crazy for? But does he really know me, or did he fall for a dream – a dream I invented, like this Bruce and Jill story? What will happen when the illusion fades, and he sees my reality, finds the monster underneath the angel?

Chuck's words interrupted her musings.

"I watched her for a short while. I could see her shoulders bobbing up and down. I didn't know if I could walk down and offer consolation, or if I should respectfully stay away. While I hurt myself, I found I hurt even more for her. I took all my courage and went down to Samantha. We comforted each other for hours," Chuck said, and Sarah added: "I still wonder that there was no flooding in the Tule River that night."

"Sometime around midnight, we realized that she didn't have a place to stay. Jill now stayed with Bruce. Sarah didn't even have a car as they arrived in Bruce's. Only after a great deal of coaxing she agreed to stay in my tent. After all, we had plans to make. I couldn't leave her there, so I said I was going to drive her to the airport or bus or wherever I could drop her so she would make it home safely."

Sarah laughed out at the false memory she was going to deliver.

"He was adorable when he mentioned he had a two-person sleeping bag only. He was so embarrassed, he offered to sleep on the ground."

"You didn't let him?" Robert asked.

"No way!" Sarah exclaimed, making sure to address every person at the table every so often. "I laughed so hard when we crawled into the sleeping bag and tried to sleep. He was a true gentleman and had a hard time looking away from me in my panties and tank top, and he must have gotten cramps from trying not to get too close to me all night."

Do I describe how I would like my dream lover? A tiny bit shy, a lot of a gentleman, a passion that extends beyond the physical? She had rarely met men like Chuck, and if she did, she usually had given them no second glance. She feared she had a type, as much as she denied it herself. Chuck did not fit into that category. How has he wormed his way into my heart then – and from the very first day?

She was aware of what set him apart. It was a long list of things she should not get into now as it would sidetrack her, but it included his incredible brown eyes as well as the fact that he left her standing there to help that little ballerina. Sarah wasn't a vain person, but she knew from the reactions of the people she met that she was probably an eleven on a scale of one to ten. Chuck registered that too from the beginning, a year ago, when she strolled into the Buy More for the very first time. The men she remembered would have called one of the Nerd Herders to deal with the ballerina problem and flirted with her, hell-bent on setting up a date. As it was, Chuck had not even called her when she left him his number, and she had to reintroduce herself the next day with a line so cheesy that only someone like her could get away with it.

"Was he in any danger?" Ginger asked, accompanied by a cackle from Olivia.

Sarah seemed to contemplate the answer.

"Matter of fact, not for the first few days. It sounds like a breeze as we tell it now, but truthfully, we both had a lot to process. Still, it was quite endearing to see him blush every time he couldn't avoid noticing me, his eyes desperately finding something to look at instead."

"Which isn't so easy in a tent! What's there to gaze at anyway?" Chuck inserted.

"Remembering your reddish ears, me, sweetie, me!" Sarah teased him. "And, I can admit it now, it was hilarious to share that two-person sleeping bag. Every time he accidentally touched me, he recoiled like he had touched something scorching hot."

Chuck had no problem giving Sarah a long, meaningful look from under his eyelashes.

"Actually, honey bee, you are scorching hot. But to take advantage simply because you were there, and I only needed to reach out, well, that's not the way I was raised."

"See," Sarah said, turning her palms upward and pointing at him, "See? That's him, to a fault. But I'm a practical girl. I realized that as considerate as he was, I couldn't let him drop me somewhere and see him drive away from my life. Drastic steps had to be taken."

The governor laughed at that, and Ginger just gave a low, "Aaaaww!"

"What did you do?" Gene asked.

She giggled, obviously at herself.

"I chickened out. I was a coward. I only snuggled up to him. I put my head on his chest and waited for him to make a move."

"We ended up staying the whole week there, tending to our wounds, but we also had some good times," Chuck concluded. "And I didn't make that move."

"But when did you decide that you wouldn't go separate ways?" Ginger wanted to know. Sarah blushed, but spoke nevertheless, with a sudden boldness assuring to talk to Chuck rather than the others.

"On our last night there. I felt depressed again, or depressed still, whatever. When I crawled into the sleeping bag, I was scared. We hadn't talked about the future. The days had drifted by. He was a gentleman the whole week, although I knew he had the hots for me. Still, he was only putting his arm around my shoulders for comfort. I could not let him go, and I didn't want to play foolish games. All my life, I'd been cautious and careful not to give away too much of myself, but, I mean, we're grown-ups. We should act like that. I recognized I should trust him."

Chuck examined Sarah's face and, feeling warm under the collar, wondered if she was talking about Carmichael or about Bartowski. The murmur and laughter on the other tables, the clinking of glasses, the soft jingle of busy cutlery, and the low background music became inaudible for him – he breathlessly waited for her to continue.

"I closed my eyes, and I said, I'm yours."

Chuck blinked. "No, you said, I'm ready. You made it extra hard on me. I'm yours would have been so much clearer."

Sarah made a generous gesture. "OK, it was I'm ready."

"I'm sorry," Chuck apologized, and Sarah nodded. "I'll forgive you."

"What was that?" Ginger asked with apparent confusion. "You were wrong, and he apologizes?"

"Sure," Sarah deadpanned matter-of-factly, "that's how it works in a good marriage."

Chuck decided not to comment on Sarah's words. He marveled how effortlessly they tossed around quips, clichés, plot twists, and punch lines. It felt they had done this before, but he had forgotten where or when.

"Anyway, Samantha said nothing else, so I held my breath forever and frantically pondered if she meant what I understood, or if this would end up as one of the classic misunderstandings between the sexes."

Sarah laughed bubbly and reached out a hand to touch his cheek as if she was sent back to that moment in sweet remembering. "Before he turned blue in the face, I took that face in my hands and told him to be tender with me."

"Uh-uhm, sometimes we need to tell 'em even the most basic things," Robert's fiancée sighed, only to blush with a quick glance to her future father-in-law, her hand shooting up to cover her mouth belatedly. Another round of laughter ensued.

"I was only trying to be a gentleman!" Chuck half-heartedly protested..

"I know, Charles. Anyway, it was … love, pure love. See, I still get goosebumps talking about it!" she giggled. Chuck couldn't help but look up and down her arms.

How could she do that? Can she produce goosebumps at will?

"Yes, that's the effect you have on me!" Sarah affectionately sighed as she noted his look. Chuck redirected his gaze to her face. How could he ever know if anything Sarah did was for real? This evening was only the icing on the cake: For more than a year, he had experienced her talents of manipulating and deceiving. There was no limit to what she could do. All the actresses Chuck once admired paled in comparison to Sarah Walker. No one could ever be sure what she really felt, thought, or intended.

"That was so sweet," Ginger sighed.

But Gene had a glint in his eyes as he quipped, "Gentlemen get boring sooner or later, I've been told. As for real men…" he trailed off. Sarah knew exactly what Gene was implying. She saw Chuck understood too. She could ignore the spoiled Governor's son little sidewinder at Chuck's skills, but she didn't want to. It was not fair to her partner, and she willed the word to have more meaning.

"You know, Gene, last night, he chased me through all of the honeymoon suite. I didn't know there were so many places in a room where..."

She cupped Chuck's face in her hands as Gene's face fell, and the Governor smirked. "It seems that your wife is making plans for the rest of the night, Charles, so we won't keep you any longer. Thank you very much for sharing your story with us, I appreciate it, and I honestly enjoyed it. And I am glad you two found each other. I wish you all the best."

Governor Kowalski smilingly looked down at his napkin, then deadpanned at Chuck, "Charles, will you give the lady what she wants?"

"Yessir! I promise!" Chuck exclaimed.

He looked surprised when Sarah got up immediately. "If you excuse us…" she said politely. Kowalski waved goodbye in response, a sentimental smile on his face.

"Dobranc, Governor!" she saluted Goodnight in Polish, and the Governor's eyes shot up in delighted surprise: "Dobranc, Sarah! Where did you…". He interrupted himself. "No, that can wait. But please be our guests on Saturday night as well, when I'll be back with my wife."

"Thank you very much, Governor, it would be our honor," Sarah replied, sweeping the cutest curtsy Chuck ever saw.

"Please, Samantha, it's Stan. I let you go now as I assume there will be a special dobranocka for your husband tonight."

Sarah blushed and replied once more in Polish before a bewildered Chuck shook hands. They excused themselves under the others' well-meaning eyes, but Gene, who took one last impertinent look at her. As they slowly walked away, Chuck whispered: "Such an asshole! The way he was looking at you."

Sarah sighed. "Yeah, the Governor is a kind man, but his older son apparently has no respect for our marriage. Since we talk about him…" she trailed off, feeling edgy and deciding it would be better to keep this for their room. Chuck only heard the incomplete sentence and inquired. "Mmh, about the home-wrecker. What was it you wanted to say?"

She was about to tell him to postpone the conversation, but then she remembered how focused and sharp-minded he had been the whole evening.

"About Gene, uhm, actually, about me following Gene," she began nervously. "It is not what you think."

He slowed down even more. "What do I think, Samantha Lisa? That you strayed from the righteous path? That my good girl went all naughty?" he asked, the smile in his eyes not helping to avoid her inward shudder at his words.

That hurts more than he knows. He really lets me suffer - but possibly I deserve it! she realized. "I mean, you probably thought that I would, uhm, ensnare Gene."

"Ensnare?" Chuck echoed. "What a word. You mean, seduce him like a woman seduces a man?"

Only her cover role kept Sarah from wincing.

"Is that what you think? Is that what you think I did out there?"

"No, I don't. I know you didn't," Chuck let her off the hook.

She pressed her lips together for a few seconds. "That is very polite of you, but how in the name of…, well, how can you know?"

Chuck secretly tapped his ear. "I heard. This is an open circuit as long as Casey doesn't mute individual channels. The mics are short-range, but whatever you did, one of the mics was pretty close, so I understood everything."

She stopped for a moment and stared at him. Then it dawned upon her. It must have been the microphone in her watch because she had crossed her arms in front of her chest most of the time she talked to Gene.

"Ah, I see," was all she could produce, but he interrupted even that. "I am glad you made the decision you made. But I have the notion you want to apologize. Please don't."

He took a deep, chest-rumbling breath.

What is on his mind? Will he spiral now or...?

"And you look like you have other things on your mind, ... that make you feel sorry. Let's forget it," he said, unusually again foregoing a lengthy discussion of every detail.

Sarah set one foot in front of the other, then repeated the procedure cautiously as if she didn't trust her feet. Chuck heard my exchange with Gene. He is glad about the decision I made! How much can he read me if he understands that I made my mind up? Does he grasp how much I struggled, and if so, what the struggle was about and how I came to my decision? Does he – does he comprehend it was about him? And... he realizes that I wanted to tell him that I'm sorry how this evening began... 'began', ha... I've been not my friendliest... and he doesn't allow me to apologize... that big kind heart... but I want to...

Then Sarah noticed him slackening his role as he eyed her watchfully. As thankful as she was about his reaction regarding her trip outside, and about what he called 'other things', she quickly and heartily pinched his ass, and he yelped. The folks at the table they passed by laughed. A man shouted, "Go, get'im, girl!"

"Thank you, but we're past that stage!" she shouted back without missing a beat and turned to Chuck: "Give me your hand and stay in cover."

"Stay in the car, stay in cover – the story of my life!" he complained but did as he was told.

"The whole hall had been observed all evening long by more eyes than I've ever experienced, so please keep it up for a while longer!"

"That's what she said last night," Chuck wisecracked, only to redden over his own words. Sarah twisted her lips to the side and hoped to suppress the grin trying to break free.

Chuck knocked at his head. "Full to the brim with interesting facts about the low side of high society, but not the slightest hint about the little auction we should prevent."

She joyfully laughed as if he had just whispered some endearments into her ear and replied: "I know I said that before, but this is fishy. There is something off about the whole operation."

They halted in the middle of the banquet hall, and Sarah got on her toes to kiss his cheeks left and right and cheerfully tousled his hair.

"Hey, what will the other guests think?" he queried with a jolly mien, loud enough that nearby tables would hear the banter.

"I hope they think that I'm head over heels into you." She tilted her head with an impish expression on her face. "After all, I married you a few days ago. Reality hasn't sunk in, the little wife – that's me - still thinks her husband is the greatest thing that ever wore Chucks."

She looked so young and playful that a fresh husband would embrace her and kiss her as much and as passionately as the moment in public permitted. Chuck felt his arms physically ache from the need to hold her. He took a moment to slip back into the Carmichael character, but then followed up with ease.

"Apparently, you don't understand about marriage, Samantha. Being my wife, reality would be an everlasting honeymoon for you. … Well, except for Morgan game nights."

She pointed an accusing finger at him. He had the notion of closing the distance and kissing that finger until it wouldn't point at him but lure him seductively. She replied before he could follow up on his idea.

"See? We're still on our honeymoon, and you already prepare me to stay home waiting for you while you play your games… or at least you told me so. For all I know, you could play games with your secretary once a week."

Chuck grimaced comically, noticing that a couple of guests who exchanged telling glances, tried to follow their conversation unobtrusively.

"Riiight…! I didn't expect you would catch me so soon. Now all I need is to find a secretary."

"I'm volunteering!" a young woman shouted from her table, raising a hand, looking him up and down appraisingly, and then quickly away as a fiery glare from Sarah hit her between the eyes.

"Job's already taken," Sarah shouted back and started to play with Chuck's bow-tie: "Tonight, I will be your secretary. I'll bring a notepad and a pencil and wear big glasses and nothing-"

"I agree, I agree!" Chuck stopped her, both in cover and in reality, because even a gentleman could be tempted. "Let's head to my office then…"

He imagined that every guest in the ballroom followed them with knowing looks, smiles, and smirks. It seems our cover is firmly established in Los Angeles County.

Chuck scrutinized his right hand as if it was about to do something historically significant, like adding the 41st signature to the Constitution. He eventually mustered up all his courage and pinched Sarah's luscious tushy to get even, satisfied with her surprised squeal.

•••••••••••••••••••

A/N (2) Dobranocka: Polish for bedtime story.

A/N (3) United States Constitution: For the sake of every non-American who wonders, because only 39 delegates signed the constitution: On September 17, 1787, the convention's secretary, William Jackson, added a note to verify four amendments made by hand to the final document and signed the note to authenticate its validity. So Chuck's signature would be the 41st.

A/N (4) And you, you don't need to sign the constitution or anything else either. Simply write a review and let me know what you think!