A/N: Enjoy my medical BS-ing, I was full on ready to make things a lot worse, but I realized that's not exactly what I was aiming for so...yeah sorry about that. I really had 3 medical articles up for Hemopneumothorax treatments during the Korean war too, but I really wanted there to be breathing room (pardon the pun) for the others to process everything.
In the short minute it takes for BJ to grab the pint of blood, he starts to come back to himself. This is new; he doesn't hesitate, he acts. Hawkeye just has the weirdest way of making him do things he usually wouldn't. It's frightening in ways he can't describe.
He squares his shoulders and exits the supply room into the OR, just as Hawkeye is being carried in by Klinger and another Corporal. Colonel Potter is between them, giving them orders as he monitors Hawkeye's condition and as BJ rushes up to meet them he can see that they've managed to get his jacket and shirt off. He looks oddly frail, the pallor of his skin highlighted by the blood staining his side. It's obvious he's struggling to hold on by the hesitating rise and fall of his chest, skin pulling almost unhealthily tight against his ribs.
BJ rounds the table as they set him down, thankful that someone had already set up a tray of surgical supplies as he snatches up a cotton ball and alcohol. He chooses speed over caution, knowing he's probably going to leave a nasty bruise, but he'll be able to apologize later. He won't let himself think otherwise.
The next hour is something of a blur, he's pushed out the room by Margaret much to his loud protests, but she stands her ground and pointedly tells him that he can return as soon as he's scrubbed. It's only then that he realizes that both she and the Colonel are already in their gowns, masks and gloves. So he rushes out, and washes up as quickly and thoroughly as possible before rejoining them where he's promptly put on anesthesia and monitoring.
BJ remembers the tense moment the Colonel cuts into his side, prompting Margaret to suction some of the blood away to get a better look. He catches sight of Radar watching from the other side of the doors as he covers his mouth, quickly moving from view, probably to puke. It's really something else when it's someone you know. He makes a mental note to check on him later.
What it comes down to, is that the blade just barely punctured the lung, having hit the very side of his chest and primarily digging into the Serratus Anterior muscle on his right. Most of the blood had come from the entry wound, and somehow- incredibly- the lung itself had not collapsed. The whole operation is textbook, their only concern in the end being blood loss and the possibility of infection.
When most of the fine work is out of the way, BJ fills Margaret and Colonel Potter in on what had happened. Or at least, what he could gather of it. The Colonel listens intently as he places the last few closing stitches, only cutting in to ask for more details, most likely so he can make a report. He seems to be silently fuming, no doubt mad at himself more than anything for not having the Private shipped out with more haste. They clean up in silence.
Things are surprisingly quiet when they wheel Hawkeye into Post-op, and they find out later it's because Klinger had set up outside of the Hospital building- barring entry to anyone non-essential. Father Mulcahy meets them as they enter, concern written clearly on his face as he apologizes for not joining them in the OR, having just returned from the orphanage. His first priority is, of course, to check on Hawkeye, and he sits himself down by his side as Colonel Potter gives him a quick rundown of his injury and prognosis. It doesn't escape anyone's notice that radar has slipped into the room to hear the news as well.
"Pardon my French Father, but the kid is damn lucky to be alive! Another centimeter to the right and he would have drowned in his own blood before we could-"
Margaret smacks his arm none-too-gently, and he realizes that the man in front of him has lightened a few shades. Radar is off to the side white knuckle gripping a bed rail, looking like he's ready to drop.
"Ah-Sorry Father, Radar." He nods in the Corporal's direction reassuringly. "He'll be right as rain in no time. Like I said- damn lucky. We just need to keep an eye on him for a while. We cleaned the wound but I'm still concerned he may develop an infection. We've already got him started on antibiotics, so now all we can do is wait."
"Of course you're welcome to sit with him for a while if you'd like. I don't suspect he'll be up any time soon but the company can't hurt." He lowers his voice a little, titling his head towards BJ as the other man fusses at Hawkeye's other side, '"Though I'm sure he's plenty covered."
"Yes, well, I'm sure he is," There's a fond sparkle in his eyes, masking his lingering concern, "If it's all the same to you Colonel I think I'll stay here for a while. He can use all the support he can get." He looks up pointedly, his signature reminder that he's calling on a higher power.
"Go right on ahead Father. Now if you two've got him, I need to step out and get things running for the day." He pat's Hawkeye's knee over the blanket, "You get better son." and disappears out the double doors towards his tent.
Radar has to leave shortly after Colonel Potter, hating that he can't stay longer, but knowing how important his job is to the company. He's get comfort in the fact that his office sits right next to the Post-op ward, so he can peek in fairly often. It's during one of these quick moments that he spies BJ worriedly hovering over Hawkeye's side, chewing his lip as he checks his temperature with the palm of his hand to his forehead. Radar crosses the room, eyeing the slight flush on Hawkeye's cheeks as he gets close.
"Uh BJ? Is everything okay?"
BJ looks over at him for a second, and Radar can tell he's going over something in his head. "I'm not sure Radar. He's got a bit of a fever, but it could just be a stress reaction. I'll have to monitor him for a couple of hours and see if it changes."
"Is there anything I can do to help Sir? Do you need to me get Colonel Potter?"
"I don't think we should bother him with this, it's nothing to worry about just yet. Though...now that I think of it, do you think you can sit with him for a bit while I go grab a bite to eat?" BJ doesn't really want to leave him, but Father Mulcahy had already gone to makes rounds of moral support to the camp, and he knows he can't neglect himself in the meantime. Plus he knows Radar has been chomping at the bit for an excuse to sit by Hawkeye, so this is the perfect solution.
"Are you sure? Will he be okay?"
"Of course Radar! Just give him a cold compress. Margaret is on duty too if you need her, but I shouldn't be gone too long."
"Okay then, if you're sure..." Radar sits down hesitantly, almost straight backed in the chair next to the bed, looking for all the world like a kid waiting to talk to the principal.
"If you're not comfortable I can wait. It's no big deal." BJ watches as his temperament changes instantly, and he waves his hands in front of himself in a 'no don't ' kind of gesture.
"Oh no Sir! It's fine! I can do it no problem!"
"Alright Radar, I promise I'll be right back."
He's got one hand on the door, just cracking it open when he hears Radar call back to him.
"Wait! Don't-!"
A hand from the other side yanks him out, and he has to blink in the blinding sunlight for a few seconds before he realizes he's been pulled straight into a group of worried corporals and nurses.
After reassuring the crowd, BJ ducks his way into the mess tent and chokes down- something, though it doesn't fight back when he skewers it with his fork so he supposes it's a small victory. The way he shovels down the food, a few of the new recruits make the mistake of assuming that the food is edible. They look at each other before enthusiastically taking bites of their own "food." BJ almost actually does choke when he spots them simultaneously freeze, forks still in their mouths, faces turning green, before tripping over themselves in their scramble for the trash cans. Igor starts laughing from the food line, dropping his ladle into something questionable when he starts hyperventilating. He takes that as his cue to leave.
The crowd from earlier is gone, most likely forcibly by the Colonel to their respective jobs. BJ lets out a relieved sigh, not wanting to deal with it a second time. Margaret meets him at the door, and his heart jumps into his throat, but she's actually smiling. He quirks an eyebrow at her, but she simply says "Follow me, you have to see this." Before turning around and leading him in. She fills him in while she walks. "Radar sat with him as long as he could, but he got pulled away. He was afraid to leave him alone so he left something special in his place." There's absolute mirth in her tone as she stops by the end of Hawkeye's bed and BJ gets to see why.
Hawkeye hasn't moved much since he left, and his cheeks are still slightly flushed, but notably tucked under one arm... is Radar's teddy bear. He can't help but to smile, laughing quietly to himself and wishing they had a camera available. He turns to say as much but she beats him to it.
"No chance, we'd never hear the end of it. Besides, our last one was stolen, I already checked." She pats his shoulder as she passes him, choosing to settle in the chair to Hawkeye's right and checking his temperature. She seems satisfied with her findings and settles back. BJ pulls up his own chair and sits beside her.
"Thank you Margaret."
She leans sideways in her seat to look at him, and he can see her confusion.
"What for? I'm just doing my job."
"You did so much more than that. You saved him you know? You kept going when I froze, if it weren't for your levelheadedness; things could have ended much worse. I can't even imagine what would have happened if...you know."
Margaret continues to stare at him for a moment, then smiles and gratefully pulls him into a hug. She ducks and speaks into his chest so that he can't see her face.
"I was frightened out of my mind." Her voice starts to tremble, "He was just lying there, and then I saw the towel and all of that blood. God knows how long he'd been there while I was just across the building, he could have died!"
BJ feels the tears soaking through his shirt, and rubs her back as she cries, shushing her like he would when Peg would have a bad day. He pushes the thought to the back of his mind when he feels the longing for his family creeping in. He can wallow in it another time, just not now.
Eventually Margaret's pride wins over, and she leans out of his embrace, quickly wiping at her eyes as she turns back towards the bed. BJ watches her quietly, and after a moment she breaks the silence.
"I used to be so horrible to him. I hate to admit it, but for the longest time I even thought I hated him." She picks up his hand from the bed, rubbing her thumb over the back of it. "But slowly, he started to get to me. He'd say something funny and I'd have to walk away before I started laughing. He could take my most miserable day and talk me out of it. He was all jokes until he found out you were dealing with something, then he would go out of his way to help you with it, whether you wanted him to or not. It was infuriating and somehow...endearing. I can't explain it."
"That's just Hawkeye." BJ shrugs, but he gets it.
Margaret laughs, "Yeah, I guess it is."
She stands and places his hand back on the bed. They both smile teary-eyed when Hawkeye shifts slightly on the bed, turning his head with a quiet mumble and unconsciously cuddles the teddy bear closer in his arm.
Despite his movement earlier, Hawkeye remains stubbornly unconscious for the rest of the afternoon and into the evening. He had successfully fought off the fever by mid-afternoon, much to everyone's relief, but there's still a nervous clamor around camp as the hours pass.
It's almost 7 when BJ steps out to shower. Klinger takes the opportunity to slip in and visit, kicking his heeled feet up on the end of the bed as he chatters aimlessly about anything he can think of, but mainly about his family back in Toledo. After about 20 minutes, the nurse on duty gets annoyed and kicks him out.
He's quickly followed by Colonel Potter, arriving slightly early to Post-op duty to sit vigil. He barks a laugh when he spots the bear, choosing to leave it in place for the moment, he'll return it to Radar on his way out. For the moment though, he takes out a letter from his wife, crossing his ankles and leaning back in his chair as reads it out loud like a bedtime story. He's into the first paragraph when BJ returns, looking somewhat refreshed, though he still has visible bags under his eyes. The Colonel examines him a little more closely as he plops down in a chair on the opposite side of the bed.
"You should get some sleep son, it'll do you a world of good."
"I will Colonel, soon, I promise."
"I meant now Hunnicutt."
"Sir I can't. Not yet." His brow wrinkles and he leans forward so his elbows sit on his thighs. He clasps his hands together and leans his chin against them, blowing a puff of air between his palms in frustration.
"What's eating you now? He's going to be just fine. There's no need for you to hover over him like a mother hen."
BJ looks at him over his knuckles, "It's something Margaret said earlier. I just can't get it out of my mind. She said that she was just across the building the whole time he was bleeding out. I didn't even think about that, I was too."
"I saw him leave, I was there when the guy was brought back, but Hawk wasn't with them. I just assumed he'd called it a night. I didn't even think to look for him!"
BJ presses his forehead against his palms in frustration. He tenses when he feels a palm on his back, but drops his shoulders when he realizes that the Colonel has rounded the bed to his side, looking down at him with empathy.
"I've been there myself son, a long time ago. It ate me up inside, I lost sleep over it...So let me teach you something time taught me: There's nothing you can do to change what happened. No amount of looking back, no what-ifs. What's past is past and the only thing we can do is learn, and move on in the present."
"And if that isn't enough, consider this: Would Hawkeye blame you?"
"Of course not, he-!"
"Ub-bup!" His hand shoots up in the "stop" motion. "None of that! You've punished yourself enough, now buck up and let it go, it's not your fault. I'll make it an order if I have to."
Something releases in BJ's chest and he sighs, "Okay fine-but I'm not leaving!" He plants himself stubbornly and crosses his arms.
Colonel Potter chuckles and shakes his head as he returns to his chair, "Don't blame me when your back twists up worse than a pretzel."
"Ah just throw me in traction, I'll be a pretzel rod."
"A nimrod more like."
"Careful Colonel, you're getting dangerously close to sounding like Charles."
"Son, I could never find a horse high enough."
This gets a genuine laugh out of BJ, grateful for the feeling of normalcy the banter generates.
"I don't think anyone could, he's got one on stilts," they both choose to end it there, lapsing into a comfortable silence that ends when Colonel Potter has to start his rounds. BJ stays patiently by Hawkeye's side the next few hours, perking whenever he'd shift or mumble, and deflating noticeably when nothing would come of it. Eventually he takes up his wrist, letting the steady thrum of his pulse reassure him when his anxiety spikes and he starts overthinking again. Despite his best efforts, he eventually nods off as the lights in the room are reduced for the night.
BJ wakes to the odd sensation of the ring on his finger being fiddled with. He looks down groggily, sitting forward slowly when he realizes that Hawkeye's fingers are moving, uncurling from where they had been lightly brushing the ring to briefly squeeze his hand. He looks up, elated as he locks eyes with a pair of groggy blues, not quite focusing in the dim light.
"Ring...smooth masculine hands...must be...Beej?"
He lets out an incredulous laugh and squeezes back, then pulls away.
"First thing you do when you wake up is look for a ring? I don't think I'm the right girl for you Hawk."
"Why not?" He pauses and blinks a few times, obviously fighting sleep, "You'd look fantastic in a skirt."
"And you'd look fantastic with a little more sleep. Give it a try and I'll be here when you wake up."
Hawkeye looks like he's ready to argue, but his body decides for him as he lets out a yawn. He settles back further on his pillow with a huff, even as his eyelids start to droop again.
He's half asleep again by the time Colonel Potter crosses the room, "Now hold on just a second there son! Not just yet, let me take a look at'cha."
Hawkeye shifts groggily, then something seems to click and he looks around in confusion. "This isn't the Swamp..."
The older surgeon comes to his side, chart under one arm as he takes his wrist to check his resting pulse, "No, it's not. How are you feeling?"
"Uh, kind of like there's a little man hiding under the bed and poking me in the ribs with a stick..." he places his hand free hand over his chest, feeling the bandages underneath at the same time he notices the IV. "Oh...right."
"Alright, so your sense of humor is intact. That's a good sign. I imagine you're in a bit of pain, any trouble breathing?"
"No, not really. Feels a little tight...but I think I'm okay." he pauses, breaking eye contact and staring down at his IV line for a moment, "The kid...is he alright? Private...uh Gillian? What happened to him after, well...you know..." He waves his hand vaguely over his side, dropping it listlessly back down when his energy starts to flag again.
"Is he okay? You can't be serious Hawk, he-!" BJ snaps his mouth shut with a look from the Colonel.
"He's going to be just fine. He was shipped down to Seoul last night and he'll be in Sydney's care, I made sure of it."
"It wasn't his fault."
"I know Pierce. Now you get some sleep. You've had a long day." He smiles fondly, and pats his hand. "We all have."
"Oh! And Hawkeye? I'll tell Radar he can have his teddy bear back later."
Hawkeye flushes a bit when Colonel Potter pulls the bear back up from under the sheets where it had fallen, tucking it back under his free arm. He shrugs as BJ laughs, and settles into his pillows as he pulls the bear closer. He's asleep in seconds.
A/N: okay so I had originally planned to only run this for 2 chapters, but I still want to add some more. Likely one more, and very likely much shorter, only time and my ability to sit in one spot to type will tell. Thank you to everyone taking the time to read this, and apologies in advance for any mistakes. I've read through this about 5 times but I'm always liable to miss something.