CHAPTER 14
Claire:
"So…. like, how long have you guys been together?"
Claire snapped her head away from the kids table across the tent where she'd been watching Jamie tickling Noah, they were both laughing with the type of enthusiasm only a child could really manage but Claire could feel the smile slide off her face as she looked across Tag beside her to acknowledge his date who was obviously gesturing between Claire and Bennett on her other side as she asked the question.
Claire could see the smirky smile Tag was trying to hide which she found interesting since this girl was only here as his date and yet she'd been eyeing Bennett hard for the last eighty-five minutes since the ceremony had ended. All through the cocktail hour and now the dinner portion she'd been working her ass off to casually converse with Bennett even though both Claire and Tag sat between the two of them.
Claire got it, at least logically. Tag was a pretty good-looking guy, about six foot, the same dark hair as Brady except perfectly coifed up and to the side. He was pretty. Clean cut with cuff links and a suit type. But something about being a wolf…. it just made you…. more… more rough around the edges, more masculine, definitely taller and with more muscle… and then this almost undefinable quality….. maybe it was just the confidence that came with the knowledge that nothing short of supernatural could actually touch you. You were almost invincible. Whatever it was, as good looking and confident as Tag was, he didn't have it. Brady looked incredibly similar to Tag and yet you were twice as likely to think he was Collin's brother, and he was just so much better looking without trying nearly as hard. Plus, with Bennett now being six-five and filled out remarkably well, and all signs of his teenaged gangliness completely gone he looked so much older and just more than he did a year ago. So, it was no wonder that in direct comparison with Tag, this twenty-two-year-old from Claire had no idea where, would prefer Bennett. She understood it but it didn't make it any less annoying. Maybe she should just embrace Tag's approach and laugh about it.
"Uh….." Claire muttered hesitantly as she looked away from Tag who was making eye contact with her and clearly laughing at her directly next to him, and turned to her other side to look at Bennett and see how he was responding to the question. He'd clearly been doing his best all night to brush off the girl, Claire was 75% sure was named Ashley, without being downright rude but she didn't seem to want to take the hint.
Bennett just smiled in that easy way of his like nothing ever bothered him, except Claire knew it was fake because only the bottom half of his face moved with it. His eyes didn't crinkle at all and she was sure he was still thinking about Macy even as he winked at Claire and put his arm around her bare shoulders across the back of her chair and somehow simultaneously managed to grab the corner of Tag's chair right next to hers and force it six inches farther away from her without any effort at all before settling his hand comfortably along the skin of her exposed right arm and shoulder. The message he sent without even a look or a word was clear, 'Back off, man'.
Claire was surprised that if he was gonna choose to send anyone that message it would be Tag instead of his date, but Bennett seemed to have taken on the role of Claire's bodyguard from the second she'd left the bridal tent in her bridesmaid dress. She knew it had more to do with said bridesmaid dress than anything else and if she was honest with herself, she was a little grateful to have a Bennett sized barrier between her in this dress, and the rest of the world. The dress was beautiful and it made Claire feel almost like some sort of mix between a woodland fairy princess and some sort of Greek goddess… but one that didn't care at all that they were about to be publicly topless… which Claire obviously did….. so, her discomfort level was somewhere between an eleven and thirteen on a scale of one to ten….
She refused to acknowledge it though. She would think she was up for an academy award for the level of acting she was doing tonight while she pretended like it was the most comfortable thing in the world to be in a bridesmaid dress she literally had to have glued to her boobs….. glued!
Claire had never even worn a dress that showed more than maybe an inch of cleavage and yet this dress showed ALL of it with a neckline that ended only about an inch above her naval and if that weren't enough the side boob hanging out should really help to up the ante… It was literally so much boob that no bra could be worn with it (strapless or any other configuration). Leah had literally done some sort of a combination of glue and suction cups as she stuck two silicon cups to her to give her a 'lift' before she'd begun the process of double stick tape and toupee glue that she'd used to stick the dress directly to Claire's skin. "There will be NO nip slips on my watch!" Leah had muttered angrily as she had gotten very close and personal with Claire in the bridal tent where they'd gotten dressed.
Claire figured at least part of Leah's motivation came from the guilt she'd felt for refusing to wear the dress in the same style when Sofia had presented it to all of them over a month ago. Claire would have refused as well if it weren't for the crestfallen look on Sofia's face when Leah had explained as kindly as she could (which for Leah was still pretty snippy) that there was no way her D cup boobs could hang in that dress without any support for any length of time without toppling right out. Gracie had immediately agreed that she needed more support as well since her quote on quote 'mom boobs' couldn't handle it post-breastfeeding. Sofia had immediately turned to Claire with what Claire knew was meant to be a blank expression but was quickly going to crumble and Claire had immediately volunteered to wear it. It was beautiful anyways and all of them knew Renesmee who wasn't there for the dress fitting could get away with wearing anything. But Renesmee's half vampire skin wasn't soft like Claire's and if Claire didn't know better, she'd have thought Nessie's boobs were an LA style boob job -hard and not moving anywhere- but that was just how all of Renesmee was. That was the day Leah had whispered in Claire's ear and vowed that she would make sure that dress stayed put through pictures and at least the reception. Claire had just nodded gratefully and for the last two hours had resisted every instinct she'd had to touch or adjust the bodice of her dress knowing it would just mess with the glue and tape left in layers between the fabric and her skin.
So as much as Claire liked Tag, she was still grateful for Bennett's warning since she'd caught Tag's not so subtle glances down at all the skin exposed by her dress every two minutes since they'd sat down to dinner twenty minutes earlier.
"Well, let's see... almost a year now, right, Sugar?" Bennett responded finally as he rubbed his hand across Claire's arm and shoulder clearly staking a claim and Claire had to resist the urge to look up in a panic to see Quil's reaction for the hundredth time that night. She knew where he was anyways, and he wasn't looking.
Instead, she turned to Bennett with a mix of a laugh she was trying to hide and confusion on her face as she mouthed 'SUGAR!?'
He had never called her anything nearly so cutesy even when they had dated but Bennett just pressed his lips together to keep from smiling as he widened his eyes and lifted his brows in a clear urge for her reply and Claire realized that Tag's date was still waiting for her reply.
"Oh… Yes! That's right….. Snookums." Claire said and Bennett immediately snorted as he looked away and tried to cover it with a violent cough that only sounded like a bark especially as Claire started pounding on his back.
"Really?" Ashley asked skeptically, clearly not buying their behavior as actually couple-ish. "And how did you two get together?"
Claire bit her lip as she looked over to Bennett next to her. She was wondering if he was going to say something about homecoming the year before, but he was already smiling, and she knew immediately he had something up his sleeve.
"We met in a club actually." He responded with a shrug like he thought the story was cute and funny. Claire just raised her eyebrows at him as he continued, "We made eye contact from across the dance floor and I just knew she wanted me to talk to her….. I mean you should see Claire dance dirty from across the room as she tries to get your attention… how could I not be drawn to her dropping it like it's hot while maintaining direct eye contact?"
Claire's mouth was hanging open as she stared at him while he said it until she literally choked on her laugh and then mouthed 'DROP IT LIKE IT'S HOT!?' directly at Bennett as she tried hard to not actually laugh even though her body was shaking with it. She was just grateful that her back was currently to Tag and Ashley, as Bennett lifted his eyebrows challengingly to her and waited for her response. She looked back around the table to see that not only were Tag and Ashley staring at her but also Gracie next to Bennett and the empty seat that Quil had never filled. Everyone was clearly waiting to see if she'd correct Bennett's story or not.
"…What can I say? I just knew from that first sight that I wanted him, and I had to use all my feminine wiles to get him." Claire said casually with a shrug until Bennett snorted while taking a sip of water and spraying it all over her as soon as she said wiles.
Claire finally started laughing as she pointed directly in his face and gloated, "You laughed! You broke first!"
Bennett was still doing a mix of a laugh and a choke as he tried to clear the water from his throat while nodding at Claire with tears leaking out of his eyes. "Did you just say, you won me with your feminine wiles?" he asked but with almost no volume since he wheezed it out while still laughing almost uncontrollably.
Claire just laughed harder at his reaction in response as Ashley suddenly asked in an incredibly annoyed tone, "So, I take it you two aren't actually together then?"
Claire had turned back to Bennett expecting him to admit the truth finally when instead he put his arm back around her and said with much more intensity than she'd been expecting, "No, we're definitely together. She's the love of my life. You don't just let something like that go."
It wasn't until the last part that she realized he was looking directly across the table instead of at Ashley and that that seat was being pulled out. Claire looked over as the hairs on the back of her neck raised instinctively and she knew before she saw him that it was Quil finally sitting down between Ashley and Gracie.
He had just situated himself in his seat and had clearly heard all of Bennett's not-so-subtle dig, but he wasn't looking at him. He was looking at Claire and for the first time all evening Claire wasn't fast enough to avoid the magnetic pull his eyes had on hers and was immediately sucked into them.
Quil was staring right at her without saying anything. It was like he couldn't care less that Bennett had just said they were together. It was like he didn't even notice there were other people at the table, that there were even other people in the tent with them. For the first time in months, he looked directly at her and clearly wanted her to look back at him and see him, except this time what she saw wasn't something she'd ever seen before. Where once there had been love and joy and hope when he looked at her, all she saw now was frustrated confusion mixed with what looked like even a hint of despair.
There hadn't been a single moment throughout the course of the evening where Claire hadn't known exactly where Quil was. He was like this specific object that was the only thing her radar seemed to pick up and as much as she tried to pretend it didn't exist, he couldn't be anywhere within her range and she not have a very specific knowledge of where he was and what he was doing. But after the night before when Claire had cried herself to sleep feeling like a fool, she had done her absolute best to try to ignore Quil's entire existence, it was the only way she was going to be able to make it through this wedding with her pride still intact.
She had felt a literal pull from his eye's begging her to just look at him as she'd walked down the aisle, but she'd refused to give into it, knowing that if she looked at him for even just a second, she'd be immediately yanked back into the lock his eye's had on hers and the effect he just had on her… the ache he left deep in her chest and stomach. It didn't hurt that the last thing she wanted to see was his reaction to this dress, that definitely helped her keep her eyes trained forward on Jacob and Brady. She had made eye contact and faces with Bennett and Jamie throughout the ceremony since she barely even glanced at the couple knowing that if she looked that way it would be much too easy to look directly past them at Quil standing almost exactly opposite of her.
She had kept her eye's down after it was over and let Leah move quickly past her to walk up the aisle with him before she had followed behind on Tag's arm while staring mostly at her feet so she wouldn't be tempted to look at Quil's back when he was faced away from her… that would still be too dangerous.
She had managed to get through pictures of the bridal party with at least one person, if not more, separating the two of them and then as soon as the bridal party had been release to go join the cocktail hour Quil had walked off down the beach away from the wedding tent until he hit the water line where the beach met the trees about a quarter mile away and had stayed there with his hands in his pockets staring out at the water while the waves rushed in through the entirety of the cocktail hour and then through all of dinner up until this point. Claire had known exactly where he was the entire time, but she refused to go to him. Even a step in the sand toward where he was felt like it would just be another example of her begging for him to see her, to acknowledge her, to approve of her.
She couldn't do it. Not tonight. So, she had stayed close to Bennett and watched Jamie with the other kids while members of the pack and wolf family kept looking off into the distance as it grew dark, and she knew only those with supernatural vision could actually see him and then looking back at her with some sort of question written on their faces. She had ignored the looks especially from Renesmee, who she knew she could only avoid for so much longer until she finally cornered her and demanded explanations Claire didn't want to give.
Fifteen minutes earlier, Claire had finally seen Renesmee whisper something to Jacob as she seemed to gesture in Claire's direction before Jacob looked up at her and made eye contact for a solid second. Claire had no idea what he saw in her but for the first time she seemed to feel the full majesty of his calling as she looked into his eyes that seemed to carry more wisdom and power than she'd have ever guessed, and then she clearly read his lips saying, "I'll go." with no idea of if he was speaking to her or Renesmee. He had walked off down the beach toward the dark tree line where the tide was creeping in and where Quil was obviously still standing unseen.
She finally blinked and yanked her eyes away from Quil's just a second later as she saw Jacob walk past behind him and clap a hand to his shoulder at the same time he nodded respectfully at Claire, clearly seeming to acknowledge the two of them together before he continued on to go retake his seat by Renesmee. Claire looked away to the side as she took in a breath, frustrated that she could obviously never attend any form of wolf function without clearly being paired with Quil as his imprint. She belonged to him, and at any pack event she could never escape that sort of definite claim.
"There you are. I was getting worried you were gonna miss the dancing and I was going to feel pretty stupid standing there by myself!" Gracie said with obvious relief in her voice as Claire refused to look back up at the table around her, still needing a second to gather herself back together after feeling inexplicably like Jacob had managed to publicly put her in her place … that place apparently being with Quil.
She could feel Ashley's eyes on her as she seemed to be evaluating Quil now and then trying to figure out how he related to Claire after Bennett's noticeable dig and Jacob's obvious yet wordless reference to the two of them together.
"HI! I'm Ashley!" she said with far too much enthusiasm before even giving Quil the chance to respond to Gracie.
Poor Tag never stood a chance at this wedding….. Claire thought to herself, happy to focus on his potential relationship drama rather than her own.
Claire suddenly felt Bennett's hand squeeze her leg overtop her dress comfortingly from where he had dropped his arm around her shoulders and placed it somewhere much more out of sight, and she realized even Bennett wasn't unaffected by the combination of Quil's presence and the pressure of Jacob's almost unspoken degree.
"Hi." Quil said briskly to Ashley without bothering to introduce himself before he immediately turned to Gracie on the other side of him and said, "Sorry, I never meant to leave you up in the air, I didn't realize how much time had passed."
Before anyone had the chance to respond and before Claire had worked up enough courage to look back up and make eye contact with anyone other than Bennett giving her an obvious look of sympathy beside her the music suddenly changed and Tag stood up from her other side clearly recognizing their cue to all prepare to join the newlywed couple on the dance floor.
The deejay made some sort of announcement about Brady and Sofia's first dance, but Claire wasn't paying attention as Tag offered his hand out to her from where he was standing beside her chair. Claire could have almost sworn that she heard a small growl come from across the table as she placed her hand in his and then accept the help up from her chair. She could see from her peripheral vision Quil and Gracie also standing to go find their own marks, but Claire didn't look their way as she allowed Tag to pull her behind him around the fringe of tables to their spot on the opposite side of the tent. It was their mark for where they were supposed to enter the dance floor about halfway through the song. Neither of them said anything as they stood there, barely to the side of a table they were almost in front of, with Claire's hand still in Tag's and feeling like it would be more awkward to remove it since he was supposed to lead her out onto the dance floor any second and yet feeling distinctly like it didn't belong in his too cold embrace. She suddenly wondered if either of them had said anything to acknowledge either of their date's before they had just walked away together and then realized that the entire focus of the table had been on if she was going to acknowledge Quil or not.
She was still lost in the thoughts of whether or not she had made the right choice when she didn't react to him, when Tag was suddenly pulling on her hand and leading her out onto the dance floor. All the other bridal party couples were already dancing, and she realized she had completely zoned out and missed their cue.
Leah was staring at her with a worried expression from where she was dancing with Collin only a few feet away while they all sort of swayed in pairs in a semicircle around the bride groom. That was better than the way Renesmee was staring daggers at her from their other side, clearly confused and less than pleased Claire wasn't dancing with Quil, but Renesmee hadn't been in Vegas and she'd still had no idea until she'd gotten there that they had even broken up.
Claire just bit her lip and tried to ignore the feeling of being surrounded as she let Tag pull her distractedly into his chest the same way he had the night before. She was turning her face so that she was looking directly at the shoulder of his shirt with her cheek against his jaw just as she caught a glimpse of Quil dancing with Gracie and Gracie laughing easily at something he'd clearly just said to her before Tag's mouth was suddenly directly on her ear as he muttered almost silently,
"You're playing a dangerous game….."
She'd almost forgotten he was there, using him as basically a human shield the way she was, she'd forgotten he was an actual person with ability to notice her.
Her breath caught in her throat as she tried to swallow before she muttered back almost into his shoulder, "I'm not sure what you're talking about it…."
"Mmm-hmm." He muttered with a laugh seeming completely unperturbed by the entire situation as he kept perfect rhythm, swaying side to side with Claire in his arms and she suddenly realized he was holding her much closer than anyone else was dancing except for the bride and groom. Her face heated as she realized what they must look like when in reality she was simply using his physical presence to try to block her from everyone else in the bridal party. Plus, with her chest pressed against his, she didn't have to worry about her boobs in her dress… except that she suddenly realized she was pressing her boobs directly into his chest at the same second she caught a glimpse of Emily staring at her with obvious confusion from where she sat still in her seat. Claire cleared her throat uncomfortably as she stepped back an inch just enough that their chests were no longer touching. She immediately missed the security of something blocking her but was relieved to know he could no longer feel her boobs against him.
"Claire." He said easily and she snapped up her head to look back at him.
Tag smiled easily before he leaned forward to pull her in subtly so that their chests were barely brushing each other's as he whispered in her ear again, "Everyone in this tent can see how clearly he wants you back."
Claire shook her head so that her cheek hit his and she noticed how smooth and soft it was against her skin…. It was almost unattractive. It would have felt much more alluring if it had been a little rough and dragged a course touch against her own smooth skin.
"Then this entire tent full of people has no idea what they're talking about." Claire responded just as the song ended.
Tag pulled incredibly slowly away from her before he put a hand directly on her cheek like he wanted to hold her there as he fully evaluated her face. He smiled before he shrugged and simply said like he didn't care either way, "Maybe…."
"Thanks for the dance." He said as he finally dropped his hand and stepped away from her.
Before Claire could respond she suddenly realized there was a rather large size presence right next to her and she hadn't even had a chance to process it before she was being swept into Collin's arms just as the next song started playing.
"Uh hi!" Claire exclaimed in surprise as Collin grabbed her hand and pulled her close with his hand already around her waist.
"Dance with me." He commanded her unconcerned as he led her with surprisingly smooth moves a few feet away from where they'd been and then spun her out before reeling her back in so that she was suddenly directly against his chest and he had full control of where he was steering her.
Claire was shocked at his skill and control on a dance floor.
"That's quite the dress." He remarked as he let her pull back a few inches again.
She just rolled her eyes in response before suddenly getting worried someone would notice and that it might get back to Sofia that she was less than thrilled with it. "Thanks!" She replied quickly with a smile and Collin immediately laughed, clearly able to see directly through her response.
"How are you, Claire?" he asked while sounding uncomfortably concerned and Claire tightened her hold on his hand until she was squeezing it as hard as she could, but he didn't seem to notice.
"I'm fine." She insisted as she smiled her best pageant worthy smile and looked away toward the kids table where she caught sight of Jamie standing next to Jonah Uley and watching her with undeniable confusion across his face.
Claire sighed internally as she realized how confusing it was for him to see her in the arms of all these different men. The breakup with Quil was clearly starting to affect him.
"You sure about that? …You've had a rough couple of months." Collin persisted as he squeezed her waist in an effort to get her to look at and acknowledge him.
Claire's frustration spilled over a little as she looked up at him and snapped sarcastically, "Yeah I know. I was the one living them."
She immediately bit her tongue as she instantly regretted lashing out at Collin. She quickly shook her head as she looked down between them. "I'm sorry, Collin. Apparently, my inner bitch wants to make an appearance tonight."
To her surprise Collin start laughing as he continued to sway undeterred with her in his arms. She hadn't meant to say bitch and for a second figured he'd chastise her for saying it but instead he simply laughed and said, "Do you know the funny thing about being the resident screw up?"
Claire just shook her head in response. She was shocked at how serious he was and that he'd refer to himself that way. The old Collin didn't ever seem to have the perspective to even care what anyone else thought of him and definitely didn't have enough presence of mind to realize what that actually was.
"Everyone assumes you're too much of an idiot to actually notice things… they let their guard slip and then you see what's really there. I see things, Claire. A lot of things."
Claire stopped moving as she stayed locked in his eyes in a way that she hadn't been before. His eyes were a lighter brown than most of the rest of the packs, much closer in shade to her own and they held so much more in them than she had ever expected. She was locked, not because of the force they held over hers like Quil's did but because she was too curious to find out what was in them to look away.
"…and what do you see?" she whispered in response. For some reason she knew she shouldn't let anyone else overhear their conversation. That he was sharing a secret part of himself that he didn't let just anyone else see.
"I see pain, Claire. A lot of pain." He offered honestly as he stayed standing with her still holding her hand and her waist even though they weren't moving anymore.
"What pain do you see? My pain?" Claire asked in obvious intrigue she couldn't ignore. It wasn't even difficult for her to acknowledge her pain in front of him, she didn't even try to deny it like she would with most everyone else.
"Yours…. but also Quil's. He's hurting more than anyone else seems to notice." Collin said just as he blinked and looked around them and Claire suddenly realized that the song had ended, and people were moving on and off the dance floor around them.
Suddenly Collin laughed and it was like he morphed right in front of her eyes, putting a mask back on as he winked at her and said simply, "Thanks for the dance."
He backed away from her with much the same air as Tag had and Claire just stood there a little stunned by the conversation but grateful that he hadn't stayed and forced her to respond to his comment.
Claire shook her head as she tried to shake off the surprising dance. "Collin!" she called after him and he turned back around from the few feet away he had moved. There were people walking across the dance floor between them and the speakers were blasting the beginning of a Justin Bieber song, but she knew he could hear her when she called softly,
"… I never said thank you."
He just raised his eyebrows in question from the eight feet away as he turned back to face her a little more and casually slid his hands into the front pockets of his pants.
"For Vegas." She explained before she pointed at him and then herself and then gestured a little randomly at her face. She didn't think she was making sense but somehow thought he'd understand that she was referencing the connection they had clearly shared that night and what he had done for her along with what happened after she had left.
Collin just smiled as he rolled his eyes to the side and lifted his brows again in an 'whatcha gonna do' expression before he pulled his own fist up and softly punched his jaw twice and then used it to point at her as he smiled cheekily back.
Somehow Claire was perfectly able to understand and interpret his sign language: He'd take a punch for her any day.
She laughed and just as he was turning away to make his way back to Leah in the middle of the dance floor she called out, "I love you too!"
She figured he'd heard but he was already making it back to Leah and Claire suddenly realized she was standing alone on the dance floor and was suddenly having flashbacks of that day all those months ago of wearing red lipstick and a shirt you could see her bra through. Everyone seemed to be staring at her the same way now as they walked past as everyone had that day and she suddenly realized it was because people were looking at her boobs in her dress instead of at her.
She clenched her fists as she turned and started making her way through the crowds of people to reach the outside of the dance floor where she could skirt around to try to reach the other side of the tent. There were a few times she heard people calling her name and she knew that Leah and Renesmee were trying to entice her to join them on the dance floor, but she was still avoiding Renesmee and she couldn't move well enough in her dress to dance anyways.
She was only halfway through the crowded tent that seemed to have doubled the number of people in attendance if the way she had to bob and weave between people and tables and chairs outside the dance floor was any indication. She felt a set of eyes on her exposed back that her dress was doing nothing to cover and knew immediately from the shiver down her spine and the way the hair on her arms stood on end who it was from.
She stopped walking for a second as she grabbed the back of the chair closest to her for support as the sensation washed over her. She knew that if she just looked over her right shoulder, he'd be looking at her, communicating something with his eyes that would refuse to release hers, but she bit her lip as she struggled to remember if she wanted to see what was in those eyes.
Was she mad at Quil or was it simply too painful to be constantly sucked back into the vortex that stole all her breath and left her aching with everything inside of her? And if she was mad at him, then what for? The memories from the night before were still fresh in her mind when she remembered the feeling of her stomach dropping the same way it did when she missed a step on the stairs that she'd had when she'd watched Brady see Sofia walking down the aisle. Her stomach swirled again at just the thought. It could have been them. Of course she was angry. Angry was so much easier than remembering the way Quil had seemed completely bare to her in the moment he'd asked her to marry him, especially when she contrasted it with the way he'd seemed so closed off when he'd broken up with her.
Claire pressed down on her bottom lip even harder as she blinked as hard as she could and immediately flicked her eyes toward the canvas ceiling above her forcing the moisture to clear away. The lashes that Leah had glued on fluttered like soft little butterflies against her cheeks as Claire gripped on tighter to the chair while she felt the sensation lift and knew he'd finally looked away before she'd decided to look back.
Angry. Yes, she was definitely angry with him. That was all she could afford right now. She could not afford to be a heartbroken mess with at least a dozen pack members surrounding her all watching just to see what would happen. This was Brady and Sofia's day. She was fine. She was happy. She was pretty. She was a rolls worth of double stick tape and two ribbons down her back away from being topless. She was an hour in a makeup chair. She was the perfect bridesmaid. And if anyone asked about her and Quil all she was was a little angry.
"Claire."
The deep voice was only feet away and Claire was forced to acknowledge it since even with her claim to regular human hearing she couldn't pretend to have missed it. She turned in the direction she'd been avoiding and then looked up, and up some more to see all six foot seven inches of Jacob standing right beside her. He was staring at her with his eyebrows scrunched with concern and she suddenly wondered how long he'd been watching her.
"Hey, Uncle Jake!" she chirped and was surprised by how perky her voice sounded. It was definitely her cheerleading voice, her fake-it-'til-you-make-it voice, and she immediately worried he'd notice.
He quirked his head to the side and smiled in response before he replied, "You haven't called me that in a while…"
Claire cleared her throat quickly before she forced out a chuckle and said, "Well you haven't looked at me with quite so much concern in a while. You made me feel like I was in trouble of something."
He laughed easily even as he reached out one of his large hands and placed it on her side so that half of it was on the waist of her dress and the other half was burning her bare skin where she could feel the heat from his hand.
"Naw, you're never in trouble with me." He assured her even as he started pulling her towards him and away from her destination on the other side of the tent, "Come dance with me."
"Dance with you!?" Claire asked in almost a panic but managed to play it off as confusion since she lifted her eyebrows and gestured toward the dance floor full of people moving and the Justin Bieber song still playing.
"Yeah, come on." He said easily with a shrug as he pulled her back from where he'd obviously come from and she had no choice but to follow, "It'll be fun."
"Oh uh….. I can't really dance in this dress…. I was just planning on dancing the bridal party songs and then sitting out the rest of the night." Claire tried to back out both verbally and physically as she attempted to take a step back.
Jacob just grabbed her hand with his free one while still holding her side so that she wasn't moving anywhere as he replied, "You'll be fine. Come on, you can dance with Ness until this song is over and then you owe me a slow dance."
Claire was left spluttering trying to come up with an excuse even as he dragged her onto the floor with what seemed like only half an effort on his part. Her feet were forced to move forward with him or literally be dragged behind and Jake seemed like he'd just enjoy the situation even more watching her struggle.
"There you are!" Renesmee yelled the second Claire was close enough to hear her over the music. "Stop avoiding me! Grab Quil and get over here to dance with me and answer some questions."
Claire immediately started shaking her head as Renesmee's face scrunched up in what was obviously an adorable, but clearly frustrated, pout just as the song ended and Claire started backing away. She hadn't even said anything, but she was in full avoidance mode and she'd run away screaming if she had to just avoid this moment. Before she had the chance to though her back smacked into Jacob from where he'd been standing behind her since he'd shoved her forward directly toward his wife.
"Claire owes me a dance first, Ness." Jacob said easily as he pulled Claire only a foot to the side.
The music had changed but the song was somewhere between up tempo and slow so that any type of dancing seemed to be a serious struggle unless you were incredibly committed though apparently Jake was even when the deejay announced that it was time for the father daughter dance.
"Jacob!" Claire growled in frustration since she knew he knew exactly what he was doing.
He laughed in response clearly undeterred by her reaction as he grabbed both of her wrists and fed her hands up to touch his shoulders before settling his hands on her waist again. He used his hands on her sides to force her to move awkwardly side to side with him in more of a wave motion than anything else.
"This is weird!" Claire complained uncomfortably as she looked around at all of the other couples on the floor mostly consisting of father's and their daughters who all seemed less than ten years old until her gaze hit Sofia laughing as she danced in her father's arms and had to look away before she could think about her own dad. "We aren't even a father-daughter!"
"You just said I was your uncle, remember?" Jake laughed again as he continued to force her to move in a wave/shimmy motion with him that made her concerned for the strain on her double stick tape.
Claire just scoffed and rolled her eyes as she tried not to blush when she caught sight of Embry laughing at them from across the dance floor and then spotted Emily clearly with her phone held up and filming them.
"…This is embarrassing… why are you really doing this?" she asked mostly toward the ceiling since he was almost a full foot taller than her, and she didn't really want to make eye contact anyways.
"Why do you think?" he replied.
Her eyes finally snapped to his face at his serious tone. She'd been expecting him to keep making fun of her as he intentionally made her uncomfortable.
"I don't know, because you'll do anything to make Renesmee happy and embarrassing me is just a perk." Claire responded with an awkward mix of seriousness and jest.
"Oh definitely." He said with another easy laugh and Claire decided she'd fulfilled whatever social obligation she had to dance with him and pulled her arms back down as she stopped the awkward swaying motion.
She was about to laugh and make some sort of joke to blow him off so she could walk away but he squeezed her waist before she could move and said,
"You know that I'm the real alpha of the pack, right? Not Quil."
He was looking at her intensely as he held her in front of him in the middle of the dance floor though neither one of them were moving anymore.
"Yeah of course." Claire answered immediately, confused by the question. "I've always known that, since before you left Quil in charge."
Jake nodded his head in response to her answer as he said, "Did you know that as the true alpha that actually makes me the Chief of the tribe?"
"Okay…" Claire responded in confusion. She did in fact, had always, known this but she didn't know where he was going with it.
"I know it's more ceremonial than anything but it's still a calling I take seriously." He said as he continued to just stand there looking down at her with more intensity than she wanted. She'd never seen or heard him be so serious before, especially directed specifically toward her and it made her uncomfortable like it was unchartered waters in the fun-loving relationship she'd always had with him
"I can only imagine." Claire replied seriously because she meant it. She could never fully empathize with that amount of responsibility.
"I think a big part of leading your people is knowing your people. Knowing when everything is and isn't okay with them." He explained and Claire suddenly clued in on where he was going with all of this.
"Ahh, I see." She replied calmly before she put her hands back on his shoulders and then started moving again, though this time in a much more normal side to side motion, just so she'd have something to do and somewhere to look besides at him. She mostly spoke toward his shoulder as she continued, "You're the chief of the great Quiluette tribe. You watch out for the welfare of your pack… -your people."
"Yes." Jake agreed as he followed her motion and they swayed in a small circle. He opened his mouth and took a breath to continue when she beat him to it.
"But you forgetting something, Jake."
He stopped moving again and she knew he was confused when she looked up at him and said, "I'm not part of the Quiluette tribe. I'll never be Quiluette… I'm just the two-year-old girl from the Mekah reservation."
The song was ending as she spoke, and she used it as an excuse to pull away from him. He let her but she knew it was only because he wanted to look at her better as he said firmly, "Claire. You have always been and will always be a part of this family."
Claire smiled a little sadly at him in appreciate while she could feel the beginnings of moisture in her eyes that she refused to let fall. "No." she whispered before she cleared her throat and blinked the tears away, more in control before she continued quietly, "I'm just the girl Quil didn't claimed."
Jake's face looked horrified by what she had said, and he was clearly about to respond when suddenly it seemed like they were surrounded by people. Renesmee was there, pulling on Claire's arm, demanding that she dance with her, and Leah was there with Collin looking at her in concerned confusion. Seth was there asking Jacob to hold one of the twins while he tried to chase after the other one making a break for the open walls of the tent, and Quil was there just behind her. She could feel it.
Somehow, she knew that he had heard at least part of their conversation. Probably what Jacob had said about her being a part of the family. Jacob hadn't been quiet, and she realized that everyone around them must have heard it if Quil had. She held her breath for just a second before she realized that no one else but Jake must have heard her response about her place in that family since she had whispered it and no one else looked furiously concerned except for him.
"Claire!" he said almost angrily even as more people crowded in between them, and a rather fussy toddler tried to worm his way out his grasp.
"Okay, seriously! What is going on here!?" Renesmee asked angrily as she looked back and forth between Claire in front of her and past her shoulder to where Claire knew that Quil was standing inches away from her. She didn't turn to look at him, she didn't want to see his reaction.
Quil groaned beside her before he said in a clearly annoyed voice, "Can we not do this right now? Seriously, Renesmee we're at Brady and Sofia's wedding."
The fact that he used her full name just showed how serious he was but Renesmee didn't seem moved at all as she placed her hands directly on her hips and looked between the both of them with more frustration than Claire had ever seen on her beautiful face. She felt a wave of nerves rush over her in response even as she wondered how Renesmee managed to move so confidently in the same dress Claire was wearing and yet keep it from moving at all even though Claire knew for a fact she'd used all of two pieces of tape and no glue.
"You two seriously broke up? That wasn't an exaggeration?" she said in a clearly horrified voice even as she held her arms out to Jacob and he passed over one of Seth's twins that had been squirming in his arms, Blake or Kelly (whoever it was), seemed remarkably calmer in her arms and his quieting just made it all the more noticeable that all of the group around them, all wolf pack family members, had stopped just to watch and see what they were going to say.
Claire blew out an upset and frustrated breath as she finally turned to look at Quil beside her. He was blowing out his own breath but his just seemed angry and frustrated that he was having to explain details he obviously thought were no one's business while he had a hand shoved into his now messy hair and was growling towards the ceiling in the distance.
"Yes. We broke up!" Claire answered angrily just to make the moment end even as Kim moved in to join the circle and Jared pulled on Embry's shoulder from across the room clearly seeing if he was paying attention to what was happening though he never took his own eyes off the situation.
Renesmee just blinked at her like she wasn't even processing what Claire had said before she finally just asked in disbelief the question that was clearly on everyone's mind,
"WHY!?"
Claire just shrugged her shoulders in frustration since she really didn't have an answer to give her, and this was the one thing she would have sold her left arm to avoid happening at this wedding. It was clear someone was going to have answer though, and Quil seemed more annoyed then ever as he seemed to be having some sort of side conversation consisting of only angry looks with Jacob above their heads.
"Quil can't see me as anything but a child." Claire finally replied and caught sight of Bennett making his way over to now join the group as well and Sam and Emily looking sadly concerned from where they were watching by the end of the tent. Even Tyler who was sitting at a table fifty feet away from them and looking like an extremely gangly eighteen-year-old now looked up from the phone in his hand he hadn't looked away from all night.
"What!?" Renesmee gasped in what seemed to be horror mixed with disbelief as a bunch of the people around them started shaking their heads and mumbling amongst themselves. Claire only clearly heard Kim's "But she's so beautiful!" and Seth's "Then he hasn't seen her in that dress…." comment from where he had just made his way back from grabbing his other twin.
Quil was shaking his head in obviously angry frustration as he quickly said, "That's not what I said, Claire."
Claire looked back over at him next to her, since apparently he was addressing her directly and shrugged her shoulders as she lifted her hands in angry confusion, "That's basically it, do you want me to share with the entire wedding the exact things you said!?"
"Claire…." Quil said warningly even as he gave her a look that she hadn't seen since she was probably six and he told her she'd be in trouble if she jumped off the slide on the playground.
Claire took in a frustrated breath as she turned away from him even as Kim muttered meaningfully, "What did he say exactly!?"
Claire felt like she simultaneously wanted to smash something and curl into a ball crying on the floor. She looked around and realized that Sofia had stopped dancing and that she was looking in concern at the group they had form on the side of the dance floor and Brady was even making his way over while clearly hearing the entire conversation over the music still playing. Even Jamie was standing next to Sam Junior and looking upset as Sam kept him from making his way over.
"Look everybody, it doesn't matter right now! Quil and I are still….. I don't know, but we're still Quil and I so let's just go back to the party, okay? Please?" Claire asked quickly as she gestured rapidly with her hands flapping back and forth for the group to disperse and go back to celebrating. No one followed her direction, and everyone continued to stare at her with a range between shock with horror, and obvious regret with pity, depending on who they were in the group and if they have been in Vegas with them or not.
It wasn't until Renesmee suddenly said, "It's okay, it's okay! They're coming to us for Christmas!" that there was an immediate breath of relief from what seemed to be the whole group that started to back away like the situation was now under control and they didn't need to be concerned anymore. "I can fix this! We'll have two weeks at Christmas and if nothing else Carlisle is a licensed therapist. We'll fix this!"
The group was finally moving away and dispersing, and Sofia looked relieved as Girls Just Wanna Have Fun came on over the speakers and people were dancing again. Leah forced Collin and Seth to both move off the dance floor. Claire and Quil were both still standing there facing Jake and Renesmee as everyone else moved away from them again.
Claire was shaking her head in frustration as she tried to make her hands stop shaking. She didn't know how Quil was responding since she refused to look over beside her and see how he'd taken Renesmee's declaration. She knew it couldn't be well though.
"No." she said simply. She was angry but she kept it quiet so that only the four of them would hear as she kept shaking her head emphatically. "No, Ness. I'm sorry, but no."
"Claire, what are you talking about?" Jacob asked in confusion as he and Renessmee shared a look where she communicated that she also didn't know what Claire was upset about.
"I…. I….. I can't come for Christmas…." She spluttered feeling like she couldn't even explain except to say that unless Quil and she were back together and legally married or something, there was no plausible way she could picture herself spending the holidays in France. She had no idea what she'd be doing in six months or what her relationship with Quil would be like, but she knew she couldn't commit to that. She had completely forgotten that Quil had even promised her this trip back when she was still in Tennessee and thought that Quil was actually in love with her.
"Claire…" Quil said softly, and she knew he was also remembering with regret the way he'd promise to take her to Paris, but she just held up a hand in his direction to silence him without looking at him.
She jumped when she felt a too hot hand slide comfortingly around her back but looked to her other side to realize that it was Bennett offering her his silent support and that she had been too distracted by forcing herself to ignore Quil's presence on her other side to notice his arrival next to her.
"Of course you'll come for Christmas." Renesmee assured her with obvious love and affection that Claire knew in any other moment would have made her feel better, but this time only made her more frustrated that Renesmee refused to hear her.
"No. I won't. I'm sorry but no." Claire said simply, speaking directly to her.
"Claire, your being ridiculous." Renesmee said back to her but it was obviously spoken with loving concern instead of frustration, the way a mom would say it.
"No, Renesmee. My dad died three months ago! Don't you get that!?" she finally snapped as her frustration broke her careful composer so that tears finally started falling down her face.
Bennett's hand tightened around her waist and she could feel both Quil and Jacob step in closer even as she and Renesmee continued to only look directly at each other like they were having a private conversation.
"Of course I do! That's all the more reason for you to come. Do you want to come sooner?" Renesmee responded with clear concern and no frustration at all in response to Claire's clear animosity towards her.
Claire didn't realize how upset she truly was until she was suddenly whisper-yelling directly at Renesmee so that no one else would come back and form a crowd again,
"NO, Renesmee! My dad died three months ago, my sister got married last week, she'll be having a baby before Christmas, Jamie is like one wrong lunchable flavor away from having a full fledge meltdown and I have to decide by Tuesday if I'm going to reserve my spot at cheerleading camp this summer or give it up and risk not making it back on the squad this year. So, no I don't want to go visit you in Paris so you can try to vampire-jedi-mind-trick fix whatever broke for Quil and why he doesn't want me anymore!"
She blinked and took a step back at the look of shock and concern clearly written across Jacob and Renesmee's faces as a panicked embarrassment settled over Claire when she realized she'd just revealed way more about her own shattered life than she ever wanted anyone to know.
She blinked a few more times as she immediately swiped the tears off her face and cleared any smeared makeup from under her eyes. She could see Jacob about to say something and feel Quil's presence moving in too close beside her even though he wasn't touching her at all, and Bennett was pressed completely to her side with his hand still barely touching her back.
"Excuse me, I have to go find Jamie before he starts to notice something's wrong." Claire managed to say in barely a mumble as she backed away without making eye contact with any of them. She knew she was whimp-ing out, but she was way too humiliated to stay and apologize like she knew she should.
They let her go though as she backed away and started walking off as fast as her four-inch heels Leah had forced her into for the reception would allow her to march toward the kids table. The music was blaring, and she was relieved that so many members of the pack were purposely looking busy instead of staring at her. It was an obvious act, but she appreciated it more than ever. She was surprised she could hear it over the music, but she was only five feet away when she heard Renesmee's voice go dark and cold in a way she'd never heard before, it was clearly directed at Quil still standing there just as Bennett caught up to Claire and slipped his hand around hers.
"What. Did. You. DO!?"
Bennett chuckled softly for only Claire to hear but there wasn't anything remotely funny about it to her.
Bennett clearly realized that as he rushed to say, "Let's dance until they cut the cake, then we'll force as much sugar as his intestines can handle into Jamie in the form of wedding cake and eclairs, then go home and get you drunk off of wine coolers….."
Claire looked over at him in surprise and a little frustration that he expected her to leave early when as a bridesmaid she was obviously supposed to stay, until he said, "I can have you singing Shina Twain karaoke in your pajamas with a very nice buzz by the time Sofia throws the bouquet."
"-Deal!" Claire agreed immediately without any further argument as just the thought of Renesmee and Leah forcing her to the front of a group of Sofia's college girlfriends to catch the bouquet made her want to vomit.
And for the next hour she held tight to Bennett's arm as they slow danced together or forced Jamie to macarena with them. She forced a very believable laugh when Jamie ate an entire slice of cake in three bites without using hands or forks. And then she had Bennett pull around the car and ran Jamie out the back without saying goodbye to anyone.
By the time Leah texted her a picture of her confused face with Collin laughing behind her as Leah held up Sofia's bouquet she'd just caught, Claire was three full glasses of wine into the expensive looking bottle that Bennett had found in the garage an hour earlier while Claire was putting Jamie to bed. She had on an old Rolling Stones t-shirt directly over her boob-revealing dress still glued to her that she was pretty sure belonged to Bennett but didn't quite make sense in her very buzzed head since it would never fit over his massive chest. And she was laughing and dancing as she sang her own lyrics to the Abba song playing in her room and Bennett just smiled as he shook his head watching her, but he looked a little sad doing it and she knew that it wouldn't matter how many glasses of wine he gave her…. he couldn't make tonight the happy one it was supposed to be.