Total Drama Pahkitew Island Reordered
Chapter 9: Hurl and Go Seek
Review Responses
Hugh Jidiot: Yeah, Topher's a rather lackluster character. And Scarlett is definitely turning out to be a competent villain. In canon, Sugar was the main villain, but didn't do anything particularly villainous before the merge apart from bullying and snitching on Ella, and trying to prevent Dave and Sky from kissing. We needed a more proactive antagonist.
Guest A: Well, then, prepare yourself.
MatiasND: I would like to keep the gender ratio balanced, but the problem with that is that there are more good female characters than good male characters in TDPI. Besides, there's no battle of the sexes or any gender-driven conflict in TDPI, so it wasn't a priority. And yes, Sammy was a bit of a load, so lucky for her, they won.
Rockin' D-99: Yup, the Tigers do have some great chemistry, don't they? You make a good point at how Shawn and Dave's friendship was forgotten after this episode, though to be fair, Dave was eliminated in the next episode, and in the finale, he was brought back to help Shawn's opponent. As for Jasmine, yes, that's another thing about her that rubbed me the wrong way is that she never apologized to Sky for interfering in her love life. Hell, she was even glad that it was so rocky at the start of the finale because it gave her and Shawn the advantage. It made her come across as selfish. I wanted all of the drama to come from the villain being manipulative. I just hate it when the good guys become assholes just to make the plot juicier.
Omega Leonidas: Thank you!
AnonBrowser: Yes, having a balanced win-loss ratio feels nice, doesn't it? Like in TDI and TDAS, it makes the competition feel strong. As for Sammy, yeah she's a forgiving person, and Shawn being honest with her was certainly better than what she's used to. Episodes 9 and 13 are certainly among the most infamous episodes of the series, though I personally think 9 is a bit worse, mainly because of Sky (not to say there aren't other factors that made them bad, she was just worse there than in 13). Thank you for your confidence in me!
Razenoid: Who said that just because the snakes were robots, they can't be venomous? Chris did say that the venom was slightly diluted, which may have meant they were using a man-made venom.
Guest B: Merci!
CMC: It's a difficult situation for Sky and Jasmine, for sure.
Vladitor: It was Shawn's main goal to pretend he was into Sammy in order to get Jasmine to think he didn't like her, but he got cold feet while enacting this plan. He then just passed it off as trying to distract Sammy during the challenge.
Polaron: I may just do that.
Lone Wolf: A very good question. Perhaps Chris is the biological father of the babies? Chris said there were lawyers involved, so he must have acquired them through legal means.
MDReborn: I heard a rumor that the TDPI contestants were chosen accidentally.
lordgemini: I'm glad I did one of your favorite episodes justice! Yes, I wanted to eliminate the parts where Shawn and Dave accidentally strain each other's relationships, as I felt that would keep their friendship a bit stronger. As for Sky's flashback, that was actually foreshadowed even earlier, back in chapter 4. I must say, I'm a bit surprised to see someone who prefers Topher over Sammy. But I'm glad you enjoyed it!
Gucci Mane LaFlare: Thank you!
Cristina Correa: Tophella's not really my cup of tea. And not to be rude or anything, but what exactly does Galactic Red Beauty have to do with anything? But yes, I am aware of the writers wanted to keep Gwent and Duncney going but were forced to break them up. Network interference is indeed a cancerous thorn for many animators and just goes to show how corrupt the cartoon industry is. Yes, Hurl and Go Seek is definitely where things completely fell apart for Skave, costing both Sky and Dave their popularity. And I do hope I'll do a better job here. As for Ella and Sammy, who knows? Scarlett's smart enough not to underestimate those who are considered underdogs. Thank you!
WeirdAlfan 101: Well, thank you! Yes, there is a bit of tension, and since it's caused by villainous manipulation, it spares Jasmine's character. Scarlett is certainly a more fitting villain than Sugar. And as for Sammy, she was exaggerating when she said she "hated" babies. She knows they're innocent and helpless. She's just not fond of them because they bring back bad memories. Besides, not every girl loves babies as much as Ella does.
amit avrashmi: Maybe so! Topher is indeed a strange addition to the cast.
Cody Fanatic: Yes, poor Sky. Thank you!
CMR Rosa: Yes, the Skave plot was very flawed. They both made dumb mistakes that ended up making both of them look bad. Many people take sides, but they wouldn't if there wasn't something against both of them. As for the rumor that Sky's boyfriend was supposed to cheat on her, I found it on DevianArt, and I am not certain it's true. It did provide a good alternative narrative, though.
Crosshot: Right-o!
Joel Connell: Oh thanks! I don't think it'll turn Sammy off from having kids and I'm sure she'll lighten up on them if and when she does.
kirbystarwarrior: No, Ella pantsing the guard was not a reference to any TDAS rewrite I'm aware of. Which one are you speaking of? I got the idea from a picture on DeviantArt a long time ago. And yes, Dave is certainly more stable here, thanks to Ella.
"Last time on Total Drama Pahkitew Island!" Chris narrated. "Scarlett made sure things between our two main power couples were not okay! Teehee! My insane challenge put the teams in some crazy danger! We saw a surprisingly dark side of Samey! Dave saved Ella from Chef and Ella expressed a little more gratitude than necessary! And Topher got a very important call from the network, saying that he was taking over the show! Sadly for Topher, the call was from me! And I'm a liar! Topher got the blame, and the Cannon went blam! Now it's back to the game! Only seven remain! Who's next to go! Just watch the show! This is… Total… Drama… Pahkitew Island!"
After the theme song, we cut to a view of Pahkitew Island at midnight. The last elimination ceremony had occurred only four hours ago. Sky and Scarlett were the only ones in the Eagles' treehouse, with the latter sleeping above the former. In the Tigers' cave, Dave, Ella, and Sammy slept side-by-side, with Ella in the middle. Shawn and Jasmine slept on opposite sides of the same tree.
"Ssssssssssshhh, sleepyheads!" said Chris softly over the intercom. "I'm here to turn your dreams into nightmares! Picture yourself on a dangerous island…"
HONK!
The sound of an air horn blasted through the night, waking everyone up.
"PSYCH!" Chris yelled.
"OW!" screamed Shawn and Jasmine, being in closest proximity to the loudspeakers.
"YOU ALREADY ARE ON A DANGEROUS ISLAND!" Chris snickered. "MEETING AREA! NOW!"
The campers only had time to put on their shoes before lumbering over to the meeting area. They all arrived in their nightwear. Sammy wore pink shorts and a blue top. Sky wore purple shorts and a gray t-shirt. Dave wore blue pajamas. Scarlett wore cream-colored pajamas. Ella wore a light pink nightgown. Jasmine arrived in her day clothes, minus her hat and vest. Shawn was the only one fully dressed, as he was the only one who slept that way.
"What is so important, it requires waking us up in the middle of the night?!" Dave demanded crankily.
"Cognitive function is dependent on REM sleep!" Scarlett complained.
"The reason I called you here is because…" Chris started, standing in front of a red curtain. "It's time to merge the teams! Consider yourselves merged!"
"And that couldn't have waited until the morning?" said Jasmine, irked.
"Hey! If you guys don't want the midnight-merger meal then fine! Go back to bed!" said Chris cheekily.
"You've never done anything nice! Ever!" Sky accused angrily. "What gives?!"
"Fine!" Chris grumped. "The lawyers called and said that feeding only one team per day is technically 'starvation!'" Chris explained using air quotes. "So this is a legally enforced team-merger celebration dinner!"
The curtains lifted to reveal a dining table with a silk tablecloth and a pair of silver candlesticks. Seven comfortable seats sat around the perimeter. Three silver chandeliers hung from the makeshift ceiling.
The campers went from grouchy to excited as they took seats at the table. The former Soaring Eagles, including Sammy, sat on one side of the table while the former Ferocious Tigers, plus Sky, sat on the other. They were treated to a wonderful dinner of gourmet pizza, bison burgers, and sweet potato fries. They ate greedily, knowing this could very well be the last time they had a decent meal here.
After about twenty minutes, it seemed that everyone had their fill.
"Everybody satisfied?" Chris asked.
"Yup…" said Sammy.
"Significantly." said Scarlett.
"Ooh…" Ella moaned, patting her stomach. "I shall never eat again…"
"Alright! Then it's time for dessert!" said Chris.
"Yay!" Ella cried.
"Someone's got a sweet tooth…" Dave chuckled affectionately. Sky leered at him.
Chef wheeled out another cart with silver platters and coverings. The campers eyed the tray with excitement.
"For dessert, you'll be eating Juggy Chunks!" Chris announced. Chef uncovered the trays revealing seven large beer mugs filled with what looked like meatballs floating in cups of vomit. The campers recoiled in disgust.
"Yeah, it was going to be huckleberry ice cream cake with an Oreo crust, but the silk tablecloth and silver candelabra put us way over budget!"
"Oh! Juggy Chunks! I remember the old commercials for those!" Ella exclaimed. "It has a catchy jingle sung by a horse, who gives a thumbs-up at the end."
"How does a horse give a thumbs-up?" Shawn asked.
"It's a cartoon horse, silly!" Ella exclaimed.
"And this is a cartoon reality show…" Scarlett muttered.
"You wanna hear the jingle?" Ella asked. She didn't wait for an answer before hopping out of her seat and doing a little dance.
"What's made of horse meat, smells like skunk? Comes in a jug, it's Juggy Chunks! How's your dinner? Mine's just fine! Because I love the taste of brine! Juggy Chunks, the perfect meal for any celebration! Please ignore the warning from the Food and Drug Administration! Yummy!"
"Okay!" Chris cried, very annoyed. "Save your songs for your spinoff show, Ella!"
"My spinoff…?" Ella uttered. She then gasped in excitement, her eyes sparkling. "That is a wonderful idea!"
"I was being sarcastic!" said Chris. "Television broadcast standards would never sink that low!"
Hurt, Ella gave a dejected sigh and sat back down.
"Now, this dessert will serve as a pre-challenge!" Chris explained as Chef passed out mugs to the disgusted contestants. "The first player to finish their cup of Juggy Chunks will be safe from elimination and play a significant part in the main challenge!"
"This stuff expired in Nineteen-Seventy-Six!" Chef whispered urgently into Chris's ear.
"Oh, don't worry! They're mostly eggs, meat, and mayonnaise! And I kept them somewhere very warm!" Chris whispered back. "Alright, everyone! Grab some chunks!"
Chef reluctantly passed out a mug of Juggy Chunks to each contestant.
"Ready… set… enjoy!"
HONK!
Jasmine eyed her mug with utmost revulsion.
"This is repulsive!" she squealed.
"You can do it, Jasmine!" Shawn encouraged, giving her a warm smile.
"I don't need any help from you!" Jasmine snapped, annoyed. Shawn sighed.
Nobody was having an easy time consuming such a foul drink. Sammy picked out the meatballs and ate them first, as they were the least disgusting. Ella was taking baby sips. The only ones making any serious attempts to finish were Sky and Dave. They both took big gulps at a time, which caused them to take long belching breaks.
Confessional: Sky
"I've never eaten anything so gross! Except for the time I was riding my bike and I swallowed a butterfly! Weird that something so beautiful could taste so bitter!"
Confessional: Dave
"I usually don't like eating questionable foods, but hey! You gotta do what you gotta do to win!"
End Confessional
Scarlett's attempts were absolutely pathetic and she knew it. She had merely taken four licks in the first sixty seconds.
"You're never gonna win immunity like that, Scarlett!" Chris warned.
Against her better judgment, Scarlett brought the mug to her mouth and chugged down a mouthful.
Ella was not doing much better. She had just taken her first chug and began coughing.
Confessional: Scarlett
"Yeah… Eating challenges are not my thing."
Confessional: Ella
"You know, I really should have paid more attention to the Juggy Chunks jingle. I know it said 'Please ignore the warning from the Food and Drug Administration,' but I thought they were just looking for a rhyme!"
End Confessional
Jasmine had only taken two sips. Shawn, deciding it wasn't worth it, threw the mug over his shoulder, electing not to take a single sip. Everyone else was at least halfway done when Dave slammed his empty mug onto the table.
"Done!" he cried, letting out a belch afterwards.
"Dave wins the pre-challenge and has immunity! Man! I did not see that coming!" Chris announced. Everyone else groaned and put their mugs down. All except for Sky, who continued to chug. "Uh, Sky? The challenge is over! You can stop, now!"
"Done!" said Sky, ignoring Chris.
"Impressive, Sky! But Dave already won!"
Dave smiled slyly at Sky. Sky fumed.
Confessional: Dave
"Yeah, I was just as shocked as you are!"
Confessional: Sky
"To eat that entire cup of bilge and not win?! Urgh! I have never been so angry!"
End Confessional
The campers lined up in front of the table. Dave was at the front, followed by Sky, then Ella, then Sammy, then Scarlett, then Shawn, and Jasmine stood at the end.
"Alright! It's time to introduce our nighttime challenge: a good old-fashioned game of Hide and Go Seek Tag! Dave won immunity, so he will be 'it.' Everyone will be given a head start to go and hide. Then Dave will hunt you down. Each person he finds will join him to search for the others. You will hunt together! No splitting up! Anyone tagged before sunrise will be on the chopping block at elimination. Anyone not tagged by then will also have immunity!"
Dave leaned towards Sky and whispered into her ear.
"Don't worry, Sky! Your boyfriend will make sure that's you!" Dave reassured in an unintentionally patronizing voice. Sky whipped around and gave Dave a death glare, looking as though she was about to burst into flames. Dave flinched.
"BOYFRIEND?!" Sky shrieked incredulously.
"Is something wrong, Sky?" he asked nervously.
SMACK!
GASP!
Sky had slapped Dave's cheek in a blind rage. The impact wasn't enough to send him to the ground, but the emotional shock took care of that. The rest of the campers gasped.
"Don't talk to me, you adulterous womanizer! You are not my boyfriend! Not anymore!"
Confessional: Sky
"Boys. Who needs them?!"
Confessional: Dave (Struggling not to cry)
"Adulterous womanizer?! Where did that come from?!"
Confessional: Scarlett
"Oh, dear! And their love was so beautiful! Waaaaah! (Sobs softly, but transitions into maniacal laughter) Mwa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-haaaaaaa!"
End Confessional
Sky tromped grumpily over to the other end of the line. Meanwhile, Dave picked himself up and ran off into the woods.
"Awkward…" Chris commented. "Looks like we'll have to wait until Dave's done crying. Nice going, Sky."
"David? My prince?" Ella cried, concerned. "Wait for me!"
The princess took off after Dave. After about two minutes of running and searching, she eventually found him leaning against a tree, weeping.
"Dave?" Ella asked. Dave did not react for a few seconds, but he eventually turned to face her, looking extremely upset. He wiped his eyes clean of tears and tried to put on a brave face. His cheek was glowing red. "What happened? Why did she hit you?"
"I… I… don't… know." Dave stuttered. "It just… came out of nowhere…" Ella put her hand up to Dave's cheek and stroked it tenderly.
"Oh, dear… Oh, dear…"
"I don't understand! What's gotten into her?!"
"What do you mean?"
"The day before, we were as close as we could be! Then all of a sudden, she gets transferred to the other team and she starts hating me! She deliberately put me in danger yesterday when she threw that bike horn in front of me! I thought the other Eagles were pressuring her into playing dirty or something, but…"
Dave then dissolved into a fit of tears. Ella hugged him and let him cry on her shoulder. As she did, her eyes popped open.
Confessional: Ella
"Oh dear! Sky accused Dave of cheating on her! So she must have seen me kiss Dave and gotten the wrong idea! Oh dear! It's my fault!" (Puts her face in her hands)
End Confessional
"She hates me!" Dave wailed.
"I'm so sorry, Dave." Ella apologized. Dave wept for a few more seconds before they were interrupted by Chris via intercom.
"HEY, DAVE!" Chris blared. "WE KINDA NEED YOU AND ELLA FOR THE CHALLENGE! IF YOU'RE DONE CRYING, PLEASE GET YOUR BUTTS BACK TO THE MEETING AREA."
Ella gave Dave an encouraging smile. He decided to suck it up and return to the meeting area. Once he and Ella arrived, they noticed the rest of the campers staring awkwardly at him. Sky was at the back of the group, fuming. Her back was turned away from Dave.
"Hey, bud." said Chris in a soft paternal voice so unlike him. "You okay, now?"
"…Yeah." Dave responded after a moment.
"Glad to hear it. I thought Sky viciously slapping and then dumping you, might have upset you!" Chris responded, grinning unkindly. Sky cringed and Dave's head sank. Ella frowned in disapproval. "Because that kind of rejection…"
"Chris, stop it! You're making him feel worse!" Ella cried sternly, putting her hands on her hips. Chris raised an eyebrow in surprise before continuing.
"I mean, you were completely loyal to her! And this is how she repays you?!"
"Christopher…" Ella warned. Scarlett, Shawn, Sammy, and Jasmine stared awkwardly at Sky, who had put her fingers in her ears.
"To have her stomp on your heart on toss it in the toilet like that?! With all of us here watching…"
Ella gasped in disgust upon realizing that Chris was deliberately trying to make Dave feel worse.
"That has got to-"
"LEAVE HIM ALONE!" she shouted, her voice at a volume never heard before. "HE'S HAD ENOUGH ALREADY!"
Chris recoiled in shock as did everyone else, including Ella herself. She covered her mouth as though she just dropped an f-bomb. After a moment, she recovered and resumed her stern glare at Chris.
Confessional: Ella
"Oh, dear! I usually don't get that angry! It must have been the lateness of the hour…"
End Confessional
"Pretending that didn't happen..." said Chris. "Okay! Game time! Everyone but Dave, go hide!"
The campers all split up and retreated into the woods except for Dave and Ella, the latter of which hugged the former from behind.
"Wow. I didn't think you had it in ya." Dave told Ella, impressed.
"Me neither!" said Ella. "But he was just being so mean! On purpose!"
"Yo, Ella! You might wanna am-scray!" Chris suggested. "You stay here when the timer goes off, you're going to be out real easy."
"Will you be okay, my prince?"
"Go ahead, Ella." said Dave, still looking miserable. "I'll be fine."
Ella hesitated, but Dave gave her a weak smile and she hopped off into the woods. Ten minutes later…
"HERE'S COMES DAVE!" Chris announced over the intercom, followed by the sound of an air horn.
HONK!
At this, Dave shot up, a fire in his eyes. He ran into the woods, determined to find Sky first.
"So the hunt begins!" Chris narrated. "Anyone found by Dave before dawn is up for elimination!"
Meanwhile…
Jasmine and Sammy were running through the woods when they heard a sound from the bushes.
"Psst!" cried Shawn.
"Oh, it's you." Jasmine grumped.
"Yeah…" said Shawn awkwardly.
"Make it fast, Shawn!"
"Well, I got- I found this great hiding spot and I want you two to have it!" Shawn offered. "You know to make up… for hurting you like that…"
"Wow, that's sweet of you, Shawn." Sammy complimented.
"Except if you're captured, you'll know where we are, and you'll lead Dave right to us!" Jasmine accused. "I know your game and I know you're friends with Dave!"
"My game?" Shawn repeated, confused.
"What's his game?" Sammy asked.
"He's trying to get me eliminated!" Jasmine accused. "Scarlett told me everything!"
"Scarlett…?" Shawn uttered, confused.
"Yeah. And in case you haven't noticed, she's got a bit of noggin on her shoulders! So, no thanks! Come on, Sam!" Jasmine ran off.
"I would never do that! I would never hurt you!" Shawn cried desperately. "…Again." he added shamefully. Sammy smiled apologetically and ran after Jasmine.
Meanwhile, Dave was searching furiously for Sky. He scanned the treetops and rustled through bushes, determined to find her first, both to deny her immunity and demand an explanation. The light of the full moon illuminated the island well enough for Dave to see, but given the head start his opponents had been given, in addition to the size of the island, he was in for a rough and frustrating night.
"Where is she?" he snarled, looking around violently. "Where is she?!"
After about twenty minutes of frantic searching, Dave decided to dial it down, and put more emphasis on subtlety. This helped him out, as another twenty minutes later he heard a nauseous moan, coming from the bushes. Suspecting it to be his prey, he took his sneakers off and tiptoed towards the bush. Just when he was about to pounce, Sky leaped out of the bushes and made a run for it. Dave pursued her, but Sky was much faster and Dave had no chance of catching up to her. Desperate, Dave threw his sneakers through the air at Sky. His left shoe missed and disappeared into the night, but the right shoe nailed Sky in the back of the head. This cost her enough concentration to trip over a medium-sized rock, and fall to the ground. Dave was on her in mere seconds.
"Ow…" Sky grunted.
"Now we're even!" Dave declared, roughly shoving Sky's shoulder. "Tag! You're out!"
"(BLEEP!)" Sky cussed. She then got to her feet.
"Alright, missy! You have some explaining to do!" Dave declared.
"What are you, my dad?" Sky sneered. "There's nothing to explain!"
"You freaking hit me!"
"Gee, I'm sorry!" said Sky sarcastically. "Sorry for believing you when you said you liked me!"
"What are you talking about?!" Dave demanded. "What made you think that I don't like you?!"
"You and Ella freaking kissed yesterday! I saw it with my own eyes!"
"What, that? She kissed me! It was not a mutual kiss!"
"And why did she kiss you?! Is it because you hooked up with her once I left the team?"
"No! Who gave you that idea?! Chris?"
"Scarlett. She told me that you were a womanizer! I didn't want to believe it, but that kiss was all the proof I needed! I will not stand for adultery! I've been cheated on before and I will not stand for it! I will not stand for it! I WILL NOT STAND FOR IT!" Sky heaved a deep breath.
The two silently stared each other down for a minute or so before their expressions began to soften.
"Sky…" said Dave calmly. "I'm not going to deny that Ella has grown on me. When you switched teams, I was pretty upset, but Ella helped me through it. She even told me that she told you that I liked you! Did you forget about that?!"
"But, Scarlett…" said Sky.
"Was wrong! Ella kissed me because I saved her from getting blasted by Chef. Yes, that was careless of her, but it meant nothing! I love you!"
Dave grasped Sky's shoulders and made her look into his eyes. She could see the sincerity and heartbreak in his eyes. At last, Sky believed him. A great pang of guilt overcame her, for she had taken out her rage at Keith on someone completely innocent.
"I… I'm sorry, Dave." she muttered, looking down in shame.
"It's okay…" said Dave. "We are still okay, right?"
"Yeah… yeah, we're okay…" said Sky. The two then hugged. They broke apart and smiled sweetly at each other. Then Sky frowned and looked down. "But I'm afraid I can't go out with you."
"What?! But you said we could!" Dave gasped.
"Yes, I did, and that was stupid of me. I was in sort of a trance when I said that… After all… you're a really good kisser…"
"I am?"
"Yeah… But when I saw you and Ella kissing- I mean- Ella kiss you, it triggered some PTSD-level shit that I am going to need a lot of time to recover from. Maybe a few years. When I told you that I wasn't ready for another relationship, this is exactly what I was talking about."
"Then why'd you change your mind?"
"Well… Ella. I guess I felt I was being selfish in not taking you when someone else was crushing on you. It was such a relief to hear that you still liked me… It was a mistake and I should have known better… Besides, being in a relationship will only complicate my goals of becoming an Olympic athlete. You understand, right?"
"Yeah… I understand…" said Dave, choking up. Sky's heart was breaking just as much as Dave's was. She tried to think of a way to make it up to him. And the perfect idea came to mind.
"Dave, if you're really heartsick, I have a suggestion."
"What?" Sky heaved a heavy sigh.
"Go for Ella."
"Ella?"
"Yeah. Trust me. She'd be far more dedicated to you than I could be. And she did help you through my absence, didn't she?"
"Yeah…" said Dave unsurely.
"You think about it. We have to find more people to eliminate. Remember?"
"Yeah… Come on... let's go!" Dave and Sky finally moved on to hunting the other campers.
"It looks like Dave and Sky were not meant to be!" Chris narrated. "Who will successfully hide? And who will take the cannon ride? Find out when we come back! To Total… Drama… Pahkitew Island!"
After the commercial break, we cut to Jasmine and Sammy strolling through the woods.
"Come on, sheila! Keep up!" Jasmine urged Sammy. The latter was struggling to keep up due to a few stomach cramps that showed no signs of getting better.
"I'm trying, Jazz!" said Sammy, hands on her belly. "Oh, man! I feel like I drank swamp water!"
"Yeah, those Juggy Chunks were disgusting!" Jasmine concurred. "Though good job on getting through half your glass! You're stronger than me!"
"Yeah, well, you're (burp!) smarter than me!" said Sammy, belching. "Seriously! What was the expiration date on those things?!"
"No doubt a few years past, I'd guess!"
"You don't have any antacids, do you?"
"Not on me, no."
"Ugh… Jasmine, you can go on without me. I don't wanna slow you down."
"Are you sure, sheila?" Jasmine asked.
"Yeah. It's okay. Go on." Sammy shooed Jasmine away with her hand. Jasmine cast a concerned look at her friend before skipping off. The cheerleader leaned up against a tree. A minute after Jasmine disappeared, Scarlett appeared in front of Sammy.
"Greetings, Samantha." said Scarlett, also looking a bit nauseous.
"Oh. Hey, Scarlett." Sammy responded.
"Come on, we need to get moving!"
"I'm too sick to move very fast. You go without me."
"Our best chance of survival is to stick together."
"I dunno… I mean, if Dave finds me, I'm probably doomed…"
"That is not the attitude of a winner, Sammy!"
"Fine… fine…"
Sammy stood up and began to follow Scarlett.
"Try to keep up! I really need you close by!"
Confessional: Scarlett
"In this challenge, Dave is the hunter. I lessen my chances of becoming prey by staying near someone easier to catch! Weakest in the herd is always the target!"
End Confessional
Dave and Sky had continued their search for about an hour with no luck finding any of the other contestants. They both kept their distance from each other.
"Oh! I think I'm getting an ulcer!" Sky complained.
"Ugh. Gross!" Dave gagged, though he couldn't deny that he was also getting sick.
"Hey, is that Ella?" Dave asked, pointing. The two of them marched up behind a tree. They poked their heads out to see Ella singing and dancing. A group of nocturnal animals had shown up to watch and listen, including wolves, lynxes, owls, bats, foxes, and a sasquatch. For a long time, Dave and Sky were hesitant to strike, fearing that the animals would try to defend her if they charged her. But as she sang, her voice became more garbled and weak. Her dancing became dizzy. Some of the animals watching left. Pretty soon, Ella had to take a break and the animals all left.
Dave moved in. He tried to run but he felt disoriented and ended up crashing into Ella.
"Gotcha…" Dave muttered.
"Oh…" Ella moaned, half-disappointed, and half-happy. "Dave, you're looking green…"
Meanwhile, Chris was seen talking on the phone.
"Thanks for the info! Yeah, very helpful!" said Chris. He then hung up and turned to Chef. "Well, you were right! According to the Juggy Chunks Poison Hotline, the kids should not have eaten expired Juggy Chunks! They might have severe nausea, vomiting, strange behavior, and hallucinations."
"And that makes ya happy?!" Chef cried incredulously.
"I'm just impressed they have their own poison hotline! That just shows you how much these Juggy people care!"
Meanwhile…
Scarlett and Sammy continued their trek together. Both girls' skin had turned a sickly green. Eventually, Sammy fell to her knees and threw up.
"I need a break…" she moaned. "Scarlett, you go on without me…"
"No! Our best chance of not being caught is travel away from the starting point faster than Dave travels towards us!" Scarlett yelled. "No… breaks!"
"You know, you're starting to sound like Amy!" Sammy commented, annoyed. "So shut up and let me rest! I can't even see straight anymore!"
"Trust me, Sammy. You do not wanna go this route! You think Amy was bad? I make Amy look like Ella!"
"I'll believe it when I see it! Now piss off!"
"Fine! If you get caught, don't blame me!" Scarlett yelled. She turned around and walked away in a huff. However, with her eyes closed, she eventually collided with a tree. "Son of a gun!" Scarlett pounded the tree in frustration. Eventually, a huge chunk of bark fell off the tree, revealing a most stunning sight: a circuit board.
"What have we here?!" Scarlett gasped, awed.
Meanwhile…
Dave, Ella, and Sky continued their search for the remaining campers. It was a very slow process, as the germaphobe had neither his heart nor his mind fully in the game, not to mention the stomach cramps were also pretty distracting.
The trio passed a bush where Dave spotted a pair of birds nuzzling each other affectionately. He felt great envy and anger. He felt like lashing out, but no one around him deserved it. He couldn't be mad at Sky for not being ready for a relationship. It wasn't her fault that her last boyfriend cheated on her. It wasn't her fault Scarlett fed some bullshit about Dave being a player-
"Scarlett!" Dave gasped in realization.
Confessional: Dave
"This is all Scarlett's fault! She fed Sky a can of lies in order to sabotage our relationship! Just like Heather did to Trent in Season one! If it weren't for her, Sky and I would be living happily ever after! …Did I just say that? Wow, Ella really must be rubbing off on me. Whatever! Scarlett is going down!"
End Confessional
"Alright, girls! Let's pick up the pace! We have to find Scarlett!" Dave declared.
Meanwhile, Scarlett was still examining the electronic tree that she had just discovered. However, her concentration was heavily impeded by headaches and nausea.
"Why am I having so much trouble figuring this out?!" she griped. She put her hand on her scalp. "Ugh! My head is pounding!" After her stomach rumbled, Scarlett had another epiphany. "We have food poisoning!"
Scarlett slapped herself in the face and attempted to refocus on the tree.
"This is real, Scarlett!" she told herself. "The entire island is mechanical! And it's being controlled by a main computer! (Burp!) You need to find it and gain control of the island! Ooooooooooh! Focus!"
An hour or so later, Dave, Sky, and Ella came across Sammy sitting up against a tree. She was too tired to run but too sick to sleep. Dave got her out nice and simple.
"Tag. You're out…" Dave moaned.
"Darn." Sammy moaned. She then stood up and barfed on Dave.
"Ew…" said Dave, as though it were no big deal.
"Hey, are you guys zombies?" Sammy asked, dazed.
Dave, Sky, and Ella looked at each other. The food poisoning had reached another stage, causing their skin to turn a pale sickly bluish-green.
"I guess we are…" said Dave.
"Looks like Shawn was right…" said Ella.
"You're a zombie, too, now." Sky pointed out.
"Oh, darn. Does this mean we have to eat brains from now on?" Sammy asked.
"Maybe." said Dave. "But let's find everyone else first."
"Do you know where Shawn and Jasmine are hiding?" Sky asked.
"No clue…"
"They must have found some good hiding spots!" Ella commented.
"But I think I saw… What was her name again? Skeletor? Yeah, I think I saw Skeletor go this way…" said Sammy.
"Lead on." said Dave.
Meanwhile, Scarlett was doing her utmost best to try and unlock a hidden entrance via the mechanical tree she had come across.
"Ugh. I wish I'd brought my remote with me…" she muttered. Her concentration had allowed her to tune out any unpleasant sensations, such as the severe nausea that was building in her stomach. Suddenly, she couldn't hold it in anymore and vomited.
"BLARGH!" Scarlett gasped upon realizing that her vomit had tainted the exposed circuit board, which began to spark and short-circuit. "Uh oh. Not good. I should get out of here."
As Scarlett retreated, black storm clouds appeared out of nowhere, causing it to rain heavily.
"As morning grows closer, this challenge is getting really entertaining!" Chris narrated from the meeting area. He was being sheltered by an intern with an umbrella. "I wonder if we can find ways to poison these kids before every challenge!"
"No." said Chef firmly.
"Eh, you're probably right." Chris conceded. "It would lose its charm after a while."
In her haste to escape the mechanical tree, as well as being blinded by the heavily falling rain, Scarlett accidentally bumped into Dave's group and was eliminated. However, the impact sent all five of them into a mud puddle. Anyone who hadn't thrown up thus far did so there.
"Sorry…" Scarlett apologized.
"You're out, Skeeter!" Dave cried weakly. "And now… you're gonna pay…"
"Pay for what?"
"For… for…" Dave racked his brain but couldn't remember why he was so angry at Scarlett. "I dunno… you did something bad, but I can't remember…"
"Sorry… Is this everyone?" Scarlett asked.
"Let's see." moaned Sky. "We have Dane, Ellen, Sophie, me, you… No, we're missing Shane and Janice."
"Well, we need to find them!" Scarlett moaned.
"Yeah. Since we're zombies now, John'll know what to do." said Ella.
"Sure, that's what I meant…" said Scarlett.
Dave and the girls picked themselves up and trudged out of the mud. They were absolutely disgusting. Their pajamas were covered in rainwater, mud, and vomit. For a few hours, they trudged through the forest with hunched backs, everyone moaning at least once every ten seconds. It was very inefficient and by the time they found someone else, dawn was approaching.
Over at the entrance to the underground caverns, Jasmine looked significantly better than Dave and his harem. Her skin was still its usual color but she was still nauseous. She clutched her stomach and vomited over a rock.
"There she is!" Dave cried, accidentally alerting the Australian girl. Jasmine promptly took off and the zombies followed her.
Nearby, Shawn had taken refuge at the top of a tree. He was determined to stay awake, even resorting to slapping himself to do so.
"Keep it together, man!" he told himself. "Sunrise is minutes away! You can do this!"
"Give up, Jasmine!" Sky bellowed.
"Become one of us!" Scarlett moaned.
"Huh?" Shawn muttered. He looked down to see that Jasmine was being pursued by Dave, Sky, Scarlett, Sammy, and Ella, in that order.
"ZOMBIES!" He slapped himself three more times and stood up. "This is not a drill, soldier! The zombies are here, and they're after Jasmine! Now, what are you prepared to do?!"
Jasmine wasn't looking where she running and tripped over a rock, twisting her ankle.
"Ow!" she yelped. Shawn knew it was time.
"Jasmine! I'm coming to save you!" Shawn yelled as he dropped to ground level. He picked the tall girl up and held her over his head. However, he found her too heavy and collapsed.
"I can't run anymore! Leave me here!" Jasmine moaned despairingly.
"I won't leave you! Not ever! Maybe you can't run, but you can climb!"
Shawn helped Jasmine into the tree and they ascended to what they thought was a safe height. Jasmine smiled at him appreciatively. But the zombies were still able to follow them.
"They can climb?!" Shawn exclaimed. "Everything I know is a lie!"
"What do we do, now?!" Jasmine asked.
"Higher! We go higher!" Shawn instructed. The zombies climbed after them.
"There's nowhere to go!" Jasmine cried frightfully.
"It can't end like this!" Shawn and Jasmine were cornered at the very top of the tree. Shawn steeled himself, a look of intense determination on his face. "It won't end like this! I want you to carry on without me! You can beat those zombies!"
"Those what?!"
"When you see your chance, you run! You survive!"
Shawn dive-bombed the zombies out of the tree. They all tumbled painfully to the ground, landing in a dogpile, just as the sun was cracking over the horizon.
HONK!
"Game over!" Chris announced, having shown up out of nowhere. "Jasmine has also won immunity! Now, everyone to the meeting area! We have to pump your stomachs!"
Dave, Shawn, and the girls groaned. Jasmine showered the campers on the ground with a bit of vomit.
The campers spent all day in a hastily-constructed first aid tent. They had been given anesthesia, allowing them to catch up on their sleep. All except for Shawn and Jasmine, neither of whom had eaten enough Juggy Chunks to be in any real danger. Still, Shawn had gotten a few cuts, scrapes, and bruises while dive-bombing Dave and the girls out of the tree, so he was also in the medical tent getting patched up.
"So, they're not zombies?" Shawn asked the nurse after she was done patching him up.
"No, not exactly." said the nurse. "They're still alive… somehow… And they'll make a full recovery."
"Good." said Shawn, relieved for his Tiger friends.
Suddenly, Jasmine came in and sat down across from Shawn. She had put on her vest and hat.
"G'day, Shawn." said Jasmine kindly. "You have a minute?"
"Jasmine! Uh, I thought you said you were busy for the rest of my life!"
"Well, I've got an opening."
"Okay… So, what's up?"
"I just wanted to thank you for saving me."
"It's no big deal… Turns out they're not actually zombies…"
"But you thought they were. And I ended up winning the challenge thanks to you."
Shawn smiled and chuckled nervously.
"Anything for the woman I love."
"So you do fancy me?"
"Yeah… Yeah, I do. I know I said I didn't, but things have changed."
"Like what?"
"When I saw how happy Dave and Sky were together, I realized that, maybe, there's more to life than preparing for the zombie apocalypse."
"I see…" said Jasmine thoughtfully. "Well, I guess I owe Dave a thank you as well! Poor guy, Sky was so nasty to him!"
"Yeah, she was." said Shawn indignantly. The two looked over to Dave's cot. He was sleeping like a baby. The color was slowly coming back to his face. On the cot next to him was Ella, who had grabbed his wrist in her sleep.
"Well, thanks again, Shawn. Scarlett was wrong about you. You're a good guy!" Jasmine puckered up.
"Don't bite me!" Shawn cried. Jasmine pecked Shawn on the cheek. "Oh!" he cried, blushing.
Jasmine walked over to Sammy's bedside and Shawn went to Dave's. The two spent about half an hour watching over their friends before succumbing to sleep.
Elimination Ceremony
While the daylong nap was very refreshing to the campers once they had woken up at dusk, it left them little time to discuss elimination, as Chris had called them to the elimination ceremony as soon as the anesthesia wore off. The campers changed into their day clothes and made their way to the voting booth. Eventually, they were all seated, waiting for the verdict.
With seven people left, each camper thought back to their respective team's first elimination ceremony. Sammy, Jasmine, and Shawn sat in the back from left to right, and in the same sequence, Scarlett, Ella, Dave, and Sky sat in the front.
Finally, Chris arrived with a tray of six marshmallows.
"Alright, before we get into it, we have a small matter to take care of first. A small matter considering a certain cheerleader who has not learned her lesson. I think we all know who I'm talking about." Chris said sternly.
All eyes turned on Sammy with confusion and curiosity. Sammy herself looked startled and worried.
"What? What did I do?" said Sammy nervously.
"Absolutely nothing!" said Chris pleasantly. "Your sister, on the other hand, decided to return and try to get revenge again! Chef?"
Chef came in with a garbage bag over his shoulder. Like he had done three episodes earlier, he dumped it out in front of him to reveal Amy. The campers gasped. Suddenly, Sammy burst into hysterical laughter. She fell backwards off of her seat, clutching her stomach.
"Oh, Amanda! You look adorable!" Ella exclaimed.
"Oy! What's with the nappy and the bonnet?" Jasmine inquired.
"Eh. She was naked when we found her, and all we had were baby supplies from the last challenge." Chris explained.
"Naked?" cried Dave and Shawn.
"Shut up!" Amy cried, her face red with humiliation.
"Oh boy!" Sammy exclaimed, getting her laughter under control. "Serves you right for that one Halloween!"
"Somebody shoot me!" Amy groaned.
"Great idea!" said Chris. "Chef?"
Chef grabbed the teenaged baby and loaded her into the Cannon of Shame.
KABOOM!
Confessional: Jasmine
"Oy, that sheila just doesn't know when to quit."
End Confessional
"Now that that's over with, let's get on with the ceremony! Dave and Jasmine won their immunity!" said Chris. He tossed marshmallows to the two winners. Their friends smiled at them. "And after the voting, Scarlett, Samey, and Ella are safe! That leaves Sky and Shawn!"
Shawn cringed and Sky gasped, both surprised to be in the bottom. Dave blanched, distressed to see two of his closest friends in the bottom.
"Shawn. You knocked everyone out of the tree last night, resulting in multiple owies and boo-boos! And Sky, you were a poor sport following the pre-challenge. But more importantly, the two of you are both very strong contestants and to be honest, I was expecting the finale to be between the two of you! But alas, one of you has met your end here! And the badass who's too strong for their own good going home tonight is…"
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"Sky!" Chris threw the last marshmallow to a relieved Shawn. Jasmine also breathed a sigh of relief.
"Damn it…" Dave muttered. He didn't want Shawn to go, but he still would have preferred that Sky stayed.
"Me?! Why me?!" Sky cried, shocked.
"Don't act so shocked, Sky." Chris scolded. "It wasn't even close! The way you treated Dave after the pre-challenge was like stomping on a kitten!"
"He's not wrong…" Ella admitted.
"Yes, Sky, how could you be so cruel?" said Scarlett.
Sky whipped around and saw Scarlett grinning wickedly at her. An intense jolt of rage shot through her.
"You lied to me!" Sky yelled. She lunged for the brainiac and tackled her to the ground. She began to wring her neck but was restrained by Jasmine. "Lemme go! She deserves it!"
"Easy there, Sky! It's not her fault!" said Jasmine.
"Yes, it is! She told me that Dave was deliberately cheating on me!" Sky accused. The campers all looked at Scarlett.
"I… may have made a tiny miscalculation…" said Scarlett innocently.
"IT WAS A BOLD-FACED LIE!" Sky screamed.
"Alright! Enough!" Chris cried. "Sky! You have a date with the Cannon!"
Sky glared at Scarlett and reluctantly followed Chris down to the Cannon of Shame. Jasmine shot a scrutinous look at Scarlett.
"It must be the food poisoning." said Scarlett, nervously.
By now, Sky had been outfitted with an Evel Knievel helmet and was sticking out of the Cannon of Shame.
"This is so unfair!" Sky griped.
"Who's the idiot that told you that Total Drama was ever fair to begin with?" Chris joked.
"Sky!" cried Dave, running down to the Cannon.
"Dave?" Sky chirped.
"If it makes you feel any better, I didn't vote for you!"
"Really?" said Sky, touched.
KABOOM!
Before Dave could respond, Chris fired the Cannon and Sky flew through the sky and away from Pahkitew Island.
"Wait! Sky! I- Argh! Chris, I wasn't done talking to her!" Dave griped.
"Sorry! My finger slipped!" said Chris, grinning cheekily.
Dave groaned and made his way back up to the elimination area. Chris turned to the camera and started to close out the episode.
"Well, Sky is gone! And it might seem wrong! But it is what it… is?" Chris trailed off, as something unusual had just happened. It had started to snow. Chris tried to ignore it and continue his sign-off.
"Who's next to…" The trees, bushes, and boulders around the Cannon disappeared and were replaced by completely different ones.
"To…" A dust devil appeared. Chris struggled to stay focused.
"Cannon?" Several sharp stones rose from the ground nearly impaling the host.
"Here on Total Drama-!" The entire island began rumbling, shifting in a mechanical cataclysm. Chris was no longer to keep his cool.
"WHAT THE (BLEEP) IS GOING ON?!"
No Epilogue
Votes
Dave: Scarlett
Ella: Shawn
Jasmine: Sky
Sammy: Sky
Scarlett: Sky
Shawn: Sky
Sky: Shawn
Results
Sky: 4 votes (Eliminated)
Shawn: 2 votes
Scarlett: 1 vote
Rankings
7. Sky
8. Topher
9. Beardo
10. Max
11. Rodney
12. Amy
13. Sugar
14. Leonard
Author's note: Woo! Finally, I have finished one of the most infamous episodes in the series! Waddaya guys think? First things first, I am so sorry for getting it out so late! My proofreader was out of town for the last week and a half. I'll try to get the next one out in less than two weeks this time! Moving on to the episodes, I got the idea for the characters' nightwear from DeviantArt. It's called 'TDPI- Jammies' by sallychan, in case you're interested. I gave Ella Sugar's song. I'm not sure how good it would be with Ella singing it, because fun fact, I have never actually heard Sugar sing. Every time she started to sing, I muted the TV, fearing it would be as bad as everyone says it is. The Shasmine plot is left mostly unchanged, though I did add in a little scene where they talk out the misunderstandings. As for Skave, I hope I did it better than in canon. Finally, Sky is gone! Surprised? I figured with Sugar gone, Dave might actually win and gain immunity, and Sky's behavior would seal her fate. Hopefully, that slap wasn't taking things too far with her.