Most days the boys were so exhausted during the rehearsal weeks that as soon as they sat down they seemed to be in energy-saving mode. BigHit was a well enough oiled machine to adjust automatically. There were always drinks and food and blankets. Staff patching up injuries, massaging shoulders or feet. Usually someone was asleep in a corner because they were just practising so hard and long that rest seemed to be the one thing they just couldn't get enough of.
Every day more elements were added to the show. Most dance routines had been perfected before Christmas break already but putting it all together was just as hard as learning and relearning.
Suddenly nobody was staying up late unless it was to rehearse, even more, there were no movie nights, there was no drinking and there was absolutely no Joon in my bed. It was fine. Most nights I fell asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow anyway. Prepping for tour was a lot, especially because now our destinations were all across the world and that made scheduling only more complicated. But I did miss him. He was so focused and hard on himself that he sometimes didn't even notice that I was around. Which was admirable and probably for the best anyway. He shouldn't have given me too much attention and on top of that, it made for better doc footage anyways. But I still missed him. Tour would come soon enough. And then we would at least travel together. I was fully aware that we probably wouldn't be less exhausted but I stayed away from the guy's apartment where most of them crashed at night to save time in the morning.
When we finally were alone for once it was because a hairstylist had left, realizing she had brought the wrong shade of blonde for his hair. Joon smiled at me through the mirror as soon as the door had closed. He turned around in his chair when I made a step towards him, his long arms soon around my waist, his face buried in the fabric of my shirt on my stomach. Gently my fingers combed through the hair on top of his head. „Tired?" I asked, fully aware of how unnecessary that question was, but he just nodded. I liked it when he was like that, soft and cuddly. But I had to admit that I was pretty obsessed with all different versions of Namjoon. I just liked the whole guy a lot, a thought that made me chuckle while I kept stroking his hair, finally leaning down, moving my hands to his cheeks and kissing him. We smiled at each other for a second but then I let go. That had to be it. As soon as I let go and sat down on the couch on the other side of the room the door opened again already and some people came flying back in. A few quiet moments here and there had to be enough, but at least it was Friday and hopefully on the weekend we would be able to rest a little together.
The hairstylist was back now. Jin came in as well, Hobi a few steps behind him talking so fast and loud I almost didn't even notice Sue also coming in a few seconds later. She still was a little uncomfortable at times, which I understood. As soon as it was clear she was with the guys for work she was fine, but if she - like now - wanted to hang out with me during her break, she seemed like she wasn't sure she wasn't intruding on their privacy. But when she let out a little polite „Annyeonghaseyo", both Joon and Hobi looked up and replied with a smile, Hobi even made room for her on the couch between Jin and himself, but Sue didn't notice and leaned against one of the desks next to me. I was busy watching Jin, who not only had completely ignored her presence but was staring at his phone intensely.
While Sue told me about how she had just spilt soup all over the carpet of the lunchroom and it had been a nightmare, I saw Hobi kicking Jin's foot with his. He noticed, growled, but didn't look up. Which had Hobi leaning back into the couch with a big sigh and I thought I even saw Joon roll his eyes.
„I'm telling you… soup everywhere. On the floor, my shirt, my shoes. I just want to go home…" I tried to smile at Sue, putting one arm around her shoulder. „Couple more hours…" „I just wanted to disappear." „Nope, I wouldn't survive without you, so sorry. No disappearing." Finally, there was a hint of a smile on her face. „And what are you guys up to? Where are we going with this?" She tried to change the topic, pointing towards the hair dye and Joon sighed. „We'll see. I am not sure yet. Also not sure whether I will like it…" „I am sure it will look great. If you can pull off turquoise hair you can pull off pretty much anything." To most, this conversation would have probably seemed like polite chatter, but I heard how shaky Sue's voice was, she was nervous. But she was trying. Even though she was shy, she tried to have a conversation and I could tell Namjoon also realized this was hard for her, giving her an encouraging smile. „Thank you Sue." he simply said but the fact that he called her that name had her confused for a second before she realized who had probably told him. But it made her smile as well.
„Your nickname is Sue?" Hobi asked and for some reason, Jin was looking up as well now. Sue nodded and maybe it was the fact that the attention of the whole room was on her now, but she was blushing. Hobi was about to say something else when Jin just got up and walked out without another word. All eyes had followed him because it was just such an odd thing to do and suddenly everyone was quiet. Hobi smiled at Sue one last time then followed Jin and I could hear him scolding when he thought he was far enough away.
Sue just stood there, looking down. „Really not sure what I have done." She murmured and it almost broke my heart. There had always been a little part of me that had hoped Sue hadn't realized that this only happened when she was around. „Don't worry about it, he is just an idiot…" I tried to help, but even though she smiled at me she looked a little sad at the same time and excused herself minutes later, saying she wanted to change into another shirt after the soup accident. As soon as the door closed behind her I looked over at Joon, who was already using the mirror to glance in my direction.
„What. is. his. problem?" I asked, having ignored it until now. „He is not someone who usually treats staff like that. At all." „Do I really have to explain?" I looked at him for a second. „Well, yes, if there is a reason he treats people from my team like that on purpose I would like to know. Longterm there…" „Ollie…" He interrupted me and his raised eyebrows made me stop. „I don't get it." „Why do I get it but you don't?"
„Everyone gets it." I suddenly heard the hairstylist say. I looked up and she was just smiling while she was massaging more grey fluid into Joons hair. „Come on… he likes her."
My eyes widened, looking back at Joon who couldn't help smirking and then nodded. „What?" „I mean… his ears turn bright red as soon as she is close to him. Most of the time he can't even talk when she is around. The other day when she came in in that big scarf he had his hands in fists because he wanted to hug her so badly..."
I had flopped down on the chair next to Joon. „That… doesn't make any sense to me." „He is a shy boy." The hairstylist said and I by now had decided that she was about the coolest person in this company for saying stuff like that without showing any sort of emotion on her face.
„Jin? Shy? He… is so loud. And talks all the time. I mean…" I stopped myself but had to think about how he got Lauren into bed without even speaking the same language back then. But the stylist really didn't need to know that. „Jin can be very very shy." Namjoon agreed. „And Sue makes him so nervous that he just gets quiet to a point where I am pretty sure he has never even talked to her. Doesn't help that she looks a little like that character from a computer game Jin had a crush on for years now. On Sue's first day Jimin stormed in here to tell Jin in front of all of us that you had hired Jin's future bride and that that game that he annoyed us with had become real… I mean then he was still laughing about it until he saw her. And now… he gets upset because he is making it worse himself and he hears from you and Georgia and Kookie that she is really cool as well but as soon as he gets up to talk to you guys he gets flustered or somebody makes a comment and then he walks off with his red face." „Ufff…" „I know it sounds a little childish but… I kind of get it. I mean, not really, they did the same to me about you. Even on tv. But Jin is just...Jin." Joon shrugged and I nodded. „Still a lot of info." „You didn't notice at all?" „No… I was upset actually." „He is tryi…"
The door had opened again and Jin stormed back in, once more followed by Hobi, who was not just talking behind him, he was still scolding. „Okay okay okay okay…" was all Jin said, he looked annoyed and I tried to get out of the way as soon as I could. „Namjoon-ah!" Hobi said, clearly wanting for Joon to help him. Joon sighed. „Chill, okay?" Jin turned around immediately, ready to yell at him, but when he saw that Joon didn't look annoyed or condescending, but was smiling at Jin, he calmed down a little. His face was still red. And he was looking down like a child that had to admit a mistake in front of the whole class. The fact that I was there probably didn't help. I was actually thinking about leaving when Jin suddenly looked right at me. „...Am not an asshole to staff, okay?" I just nodded, a little confused. „I think what you are trying to say is that you will be more polite to Sue and that you never intended to be an asshole, right?" Namjoon tried to help and I could hear Jin take a shaky breath before nodding. He was incredibly uncomfortable, again not able to look me in the eyes for long. I nodded again, this time trying to smile at him. Okay. Good. „I think I should get back to work." I said and lightly patted Jin's arm after I got up. „I see you guys later." Once I was out of the room I couldn't help taking a deep breath. Okay. Not ideal. But better than Jin bullying my team members on purpose?
I let out a big sigh and made my way back to the office. Only to run into Yoongi moments later. He was talking to a woman in the hallway and I had almost walked past them with a little „Hi", when Yoongi said my name. Others would have raised there voice to get the attention of someone walking by, Yoongi for some reason didn't need to. A simple „Ollie?" and I turned around. He was gesturing towards the woman and suddenly I understood who she was. Sang-Hee. His fiancée. „Ohh… Oh hello, I am so sorry." I said almost stumbling over my own words. She smiled at me and I was about to drop everything I was carrying on the floor because fucking hell, she was incredibly beautiful.
About the same height as Yoongi, she still looked somewhat like a model, but also a Disney princess? With a smile so wide and inviting I WANTED TO MARRY HER. When she started speaking there was no shyness whatsoever, there was a slight Australian accent - Yoongi had told me that she had studied there - and her voice was quiet and beautiful… I was basically a little in love.
„You are Olivia? Hey. Nice to meet you! I… heard a lot about you!" We shook hands while I looked over at Yoongi, a bit surprised he would have talked about me, but he just shook his head grinning. „Well, not from me." „Oh." „Don't worry about it." Sang-Hee just said. „The first time Namjoon was drunk in front of me I basically made him tell me all his secrets." „Oh nooo…" I murmured, honestly a bit terrified because back then he probably didn't have too many nice things to say about me. This was when I realized I was still holding her hand, so I quickly let go. „As I said… nothing to worry about."
I blinked twice and then nodded. „Why… why are you guys here? Together?" I finally asked when I realized that this was rather unusual. And then... „Oh, you are talking to Bang today?" Both started nodding and I didn't know Sang-Her so I couldn't tell, but Yoongi looked a little worried, even though he tried to hide it. When Sang-Hee realized she simply took his hand with a smile, which made him smile as well. „It's going to be fine. It has to be. He asked us in the past not to date anyone. He can't ask me to get un-engaged." He finally said and squeezed her hand. „We should actually get going. Wish us luck?" I nodded. Only to then watch them walk off, Yoongis arm around his fiancee's shoulder. When I finally kept walking I had to think of those Veela creatures in Harry Potter.
The rest of the day went by so quickly it had my head spinning. I was about to head home when I luckily checked my phone.
Namjoon: [18:39 PM] Hey beautiful woman I haven't properly talked to in way too long, are you still at the office? Me: [19:02 PM] Hello beautiful man that I am only getting back to now because I buried my phone under a pile of paperwork, I was about to head home. Where are you? Namjoon: [19:04 PM] We are having dinner down the street, want to meet at my place later?
It was a little weird walking around Namjoon's apartment without him being there. He had given me his apartment key code and apparently the doorman was good enough at his job to recognize me but also polite enough to simply nod smiling when I got on the elevator.
I had to wait a while, but at least it meant I couldn't spend the rest of the night leaning over my computer and being frustrated about the schedule being updated every other minute - which then, in turn, meant we had to change our schedules as well. I was about to turn on the tv when I got a call and sat down on the couch to answer it. It was of course work and I tried to end the call as fast as possible, but there was a little familiar tune chiming through the room when the apartment door opened and Joon walked through. I got up and wanted to gesture towards him to be quiet for a second, I didn't need the person on the other side to hear his voice when my mouth opened slightly. Would I ever get used to him just sometimes appearing out of nowhere wearing something like… those incredibly tight leather pants?
Namjoon dropped his bag while I said my goodbyes and he moaned as soon as I had hung up. „Please tell me you can just turn that thing off for the rest of the night? I so need an evening away from all of it. We just had a four-hour photoshoot before dinner and my cheeks actually hurt from smiling." „To be honest… you could basically ask anything from me in those pants…" I admitted and demonstrated by turning off my phone. Which I probably would regret later. Right now though, I was rewarded by his face lighting up and a cheeky grin appearing. „Really?" „Pretty much." He had walked over to me, but as soon as he was in front of me I pushed him backwards onto the couch, seconds later I was straddling him, kissing him hard. Maybe he was laughing at my thirst at first, but soon he stopped, his hands on my ass, me grinding against him. From the noises he made I gathered that he enjoyed it just as much as I did. Soon I had him whimper beneath me. I had to admit that I enjoyed it, especially in combination with the way his face was flushed and his eyes hooded, soon closed. But all of a sudden the sounds Joon made changed and when I looked down the next time his expression was no longer one of pleasure, more of pain and I stopped immediately.
„Shit, you okay?" Namjoons face was tense. His was pressing his eyes and lips shut, before shaking his head. „Pants…" he finally let out and I probably had never gotten up that quickly. Nononoo… „Oh, Joon, I am so sorry, I am such an idiot, I actually thought you were enjoying yourself." I murmured while sliding off his lap to the floor and he opened button and zipper in record speed, only to let out the deepest sigh I had ever heard from him. He gave himself a moment before answering, one hand on his bulge. „Trust me. I was enjoying myself until a second ago." He was laughing now and I couldn't help grinning either.
„Better?" I asked after he looked like he was relaxing. He nodded. „Good. You think I can make it up to you then?" I grinned widely now and when Joon looked down at me there was confusion in his face at first, then he put two and two together. His hands now both raised next to him in the air and a priceless expression on his face as if to say ‚Well, if you want to.' Still smiling I was extra careful when I took his cock out of his boxers, his hissing had turned back to sounding painless. He was so incredibly hard already, I gave one slow lick up his length before I went straight to it, taking him into my mouth. If the reappearance of the leather pants had meant one thing it was that he had no chance to last very long. Because I was determined to give him his first orgasm before he had even taken his jacket off. Maybe I wasn't as okay with the whole not seeing each other a lot at the moment thing as I tried to pretend to myself.
"Is this what happens when we don't get to see each other? Like every time or..." Namjoon asked a while later when we both lay between his messed up sheets on the bed. Still breathing heavy, exhausted, but happy. I chuckled, then shrugged my shoulders. Hard to tell. Moving back over to him I pressed my lips against his shoulder, which had him pulling me into a hug. "Bogoshipda in past tense." I said, because I already couldn't remember the other form even though I had tried. Now Joon was laughing into my ear. "Bogoshipda in past tense you too." I closed my eyes and was about to let out a sigh because I was so comfortable when I suddenly remembered something.
"Yoongi!" I whispered. "Ehm... nope. Kim Namjoon?" Namjoon replied with a bit of a chuckle in his voice, but also a clearly implied question. "No, I mean... Yoongi and Sang-Hee. How did their talk go?" I let go a little to look into his eyes, he had seen Yoongi afterwards, after all, he would probably know.
"I think it went... well..." Joon just replied, still probably a bit frazzled by the sudden topic change. "Oh good. I met them earlier. Shit. She is about the most beautiful woman I've ever seen! How does he get anything done? Her face is just..." Now Joon was just laughing. "I mean... what I like about this is how you are naked in my arms calling me Yoongi and then talking about how attractive other women are." I closed my mouth slowly, biting my lower lip. "Come on. She is stunning." "I am aware. We are all aware." Namjoon said winking and started stroking my lower back. "Bang wasn't... ecstatic of course. Which I get. But he has known about Sangie for a while and probably saw this coming long before I did. But it is good they talked about it and after tour there will be a whole team planning how to make the announcement, how the wedding can be done without media finding out about it too much and... yeah, it's a lot. Yoongi hates it. But he is so in love, he would have changed his name to Lajimolala to marry her."
I couldn't help smiling, I was happy to hear that. Because of Yoongi, but also because I knew that longterm that meant maybe Bang wouldn't kill me when he found out about us. "Never taken Yoongi to be the marrying kind." I said, my hands on Joon's shoulder now. When I started digging my fingers into his muscles he let out a little growl, his shoulders felt a little softer now than half an hour ago, but still pretty tense. "Me neither. To be honest I don't think he even considered it before her. But I think it makes sense. They like... Look. They fight and they are not perfect, but in a way... watching them fall in love was like watching a movie. They actually complete each other. When she is around Yoongi is relaxed and looks so happy. And she doesn't seem to be someone who needs to hear something to know it to be true, so Yoongi didn't need to change to let her know how much he cares...and he does..."
I watched Namjoon's lips move in the half-dark. The way he talked it was just too obvious that he was happy for his friend. Friends. "That sounds wonderful. I'm glad they found each other." "Yeah, me too." "She told me you told her about me at some point..." Joon groaned and then sighed. "Yeah. A while after they met, Yoongi brought Sangie to dinner with me and Jin and... we had too many drinks. Or... rather I had too many drinks. Which apparently turned me into a sentimental mess that night and she is a psychology major and..." I could only imagine it, but I was torn between thinking it was funny and then remembering that they had talked about me, so I probably wouldn't have liked that conversation much.
"So is she actually really polite but kind of hates me because of what she heard?" I asked after a while, looking down. "No? What?" Namjoon's index finger was under my chin, pointing my face back up so he could look at me. "Well..." I shrugged and then didn't seem to feel like finishing the sentence. "We talked about what happened. But I was really drunk that night. And more sad than angry." "Oh no." I said, pushing my lower lip forward, which he copied before he laughed. "Apparently it is quite the first impression when one of the best friends of your new boyfriend cries at your shoulder when you meet for the first time. So no wonder she remembered..." "You cried?" "I hadn't until then. Which is weird because it was so long after North Carolina but apparently I had to let it out." I just looked at him for a while, then went back to hugging him again. Chest against chest, stomach against stomach, I basically didn't want to let go at all. "It's okay." he said after a while, laughing. "But I am passing the hug along to past-Joon." I nodded against his shoulder.
"But I have a way more important question for you:" Namjoon said, clearly trying to change the topic to something a bit more cheery. "What is the first thing you want to do when we get to Australia?" "Find a kangaroo for Georgia to pat and for Sue to eat." I said without any hesitation, lying back down next to him. "Okay. That is... sweet and terrifying." "Yes. It's going to be great."