"What the hell is he doing down there?" Gaige asked, peering down into Sawtooth Cauldron.
"The explanation / is fairly self-evident. / He's fighting unarmed." Zer0 replied.
"Yeah, I know that, but why?"
"Oh, because I dared him to."
Three of the Vault Hunters turned around to face Salvador. Krieg was a few meters away from the group, not paying attention as he idly carved a swear word into a peice of scrap metal with his buzz axe.
Maya was angry. Gaige was flabbergasted. Zer0 was...Zer0.
"What?" Salvador asked innocently.
Maya erupted in a fit of matronly wrath. Salvador felt as if he were a boy being scolded by his abuela again.
"You DARED one of our closest friends to walk into SAWTOOTH CAULDRON, steal a very special gun from an extremely dangerous bandit, make as much noise as possible, and do all of this UNARMED? What were you THINKING?"
Salvador looked at her. In his mind, the answer was as plain as the sun in the sky.
"I thought it would be funny."
Axton was running for his life. All around him, bullets pinged against scrap metal and threw up dirt as he slid behind cover, mantled over walls, and generally tried to avoid death as well as he could. He felt something whiz through the air right above his head. Running his hand through his hair, he surprisingly didn't feel any blood. He did feel a massive hole in his haircut, though. He looked to his left, judging where the shot came from. A large nomad carrying a spiked shield and an SMG had apparently done the shooting.
Oh, you motherfucker. Axton thought.
He dashed up a staircase, shoving a psycho off of it and down into the knee-deep water of the Stilts. A marauder stepped out of a shack in front of him, lighting up the air with assault rifle fire, but Axton slid under the marauder's aim and delivered a swift kick to the kneecap. The bandit fell to the ground in agony as Axton got up, still running as fast as he could.
"What's the big deal? He hasn't even been shot yet."
"There are at the very least forty bandits down there and I-"
"Fifty-three." Zer0 interjected, watching Axton through his sniper scope.
"There are fifty-three bandits down there, and I'm pretty sure they're not going to stop shooting until he's dead or they're out of bullets. They probably won't stop shooting even after the first one, actually." Maya chided. "I'm honestly shocked he hasn't been hit yet."
"Maybe he just put that absorb shield on." Gaige offered. "That one we got when we fought the Bunker."
"He's got no shield on / Yet no bullets seem to land. / He's really lucky." Zer0 offered.
"He doesn't even have a shield on?" Maya seethed.
"That was part of the dare." Salvador said, instantly regretting his words as Maya turned to him, scowling.
At least those dickheads stopped shooting, Axton thought. They didn't want to shoot their boss without being able to take credit for it. Axton had finally seen his target. The bandit known as Arbor, who was rumored to have a gun made of solid gold. After avoiding bullets for what seemed like an eternity, an incredibly bright reflection had caught his eye. Unfortunately for Axton, Arbor wasn't giving up his weapon so easily. He held the gun, a Dahl pistol, in his left hand, and a buzz axe in the right. Arbor leapt at Axton, axe whirring as it came towards Axton's neck. He ducked quickly, and the axe bit into a steel girder. He lunged out with both legs, sending the bandit flying. Axton stood, tugging free the buzz axe from the girder.
"Let's make it a fair fight, huh?" he said, smirking at the bandit as he tossed the buzz axe back to him.
"Shut up!" Arbor said, firing the golden gun at him. Axton weaved in a zigzag pattern, throwing off the bandit's already shoddy aim even more. He grabbed Arbor's gun arm, bending the elbow the wrong way as his other hand curled into a fist and introduced itself to Arbor's gut. The bandit stumbled backward and screamed, his shooting arm crippled. Axton put up a boxer's stance, pressing his advantage.
Man, this takes me back to that campaign on Golgotha. Axton thought. No ammo for three days and a horde of death row inmates hopped up on experimental combat drugs. He felt bad for whoever had to clean the place up afterwards. Axton gave him a right hook to the jaw, then a kick to the chest. The bandit was clearly outmatched. Axton let his guard down, moving his feet in a fancy imitation of a boxer's warm up routine.
"Is he seriously taunting that bandit guy right now? Honestly, he kind of deserves to get shot after a stunt like that." Gage said idly.
"He's pressing his luck. / He's acting like he wants it. / How have they all missed?" Zer0 offered.
He is such a moron, Maya thought. Why couldn't I have found somebody who likes to sit down and read? I doubt he's even heard of Catcher in the Rye. I doubt he knows what rye even is.
Salvador sat on a nearby rock, still recovering from Maya's scolding as he watched Krieg draw more buzz axe art.
"Ding ding ding!" Axton said, grinning as he moved in on the bandit again. "That's the bell, dummy. You ready for this?" he taunted. The dazed bandit leader could hardly throw his hands up to protect himself as Axton gave him one right under his chin, lifting the bandit up a foot off the ground and sending him crashing onto the floor. Axton quickly bent down, stole the bandit's gun, and ran like hell.
He leapt off the shanty-town structure the bandits had made, landing smoothly on his feet as the bandits started shooting again.
Where's that guy? he thought, eyes moving over the nearby bandits, scanning for the big nomad who'd shot his hair earlier. There you are.
Axton swiftly changed course, a wide grin on his face as he ducked and weaved, avoiding the bandits' snap-fired shots. One of them threw a grenade at him. Axton seized the moment, snagging the explosive out of the mud and hurling it at the big nomad. The blast exploded harmlessly off of his shield, but the big bandit stumbled back, and that was all Axton needed to drop a few quick bursts into the bandit's chest.
Then, his work done, he ran like hell again.
"Come on, Maya. It was totally worth it. Do you even see this gun?"
"I see it, Axton."
"I don't really think you do. Because if you saw it, you would realize how incredibly badass it is, and how incredibly badass, not to mention brave, skillful, handsome, and charming I am."
"Axton, you ran into the most dangerous bandit camp on Pandora without even a shield just to get a stupid little gun."
"A gun made out of solid gold."
"A stupid little gun."
Axton grinned at the woman sitting across the table from him. "You're so pretty when you're mad." The dim pink lights of Moxxi's bar shone down on the pair, highlighting their forms with velvet.
Maya crossed her arms across her chest. "Axton, now is not the time. That move you pulled was stupid."
"Maya, I'm fine."
"You could have been killed."
"We could all be killed at almost every moment of the day."
"That's different."
"Not really. We do tend to spend most of our time getting shot at. How is it much different?"
"We weren't there to back you up. You also didn't have a shield on."
"I had the situation completely under control."
"Your new haircut says otherwise."
"Maya, trust me. I knew what I was doing." Axton replied. He paused a moment, swirling around the ice in his drink. "I think I'm getting bored, Maya."
"What do you mean?"
"I don't know. I feel like...like there's nothing else to do. I mean, it feels like we go to the same places, do the same things, over and over again. What else is there to do? I mean, I just don't know what else this planet has to offer. I think that Hector guy made me realize that. We beat Handsome Jack. We found that treasure in the desert. You guys all did Hammerlock's thing while I did Torgue's tournament. What else is there?"
"Honestly, I think most of us feel the same. I came here to find out more about being a Siren, and I've learned nothing so far." Maya replied. "Do you want to leave, Axton?"
"I mean...I don't want to leave you, or anybody else." he said. "But every day I feel the need to get out of here. Explore something. Explore some new planets."
"I want to go back home." Maya agreed. "Without me, Athenas is...almost completely unprotected. I'm one of the few people there who hasn't taken a vow of nonviolence."
"Oh." said Axton, a hint of disappointment in his voice. "So that's it? Just...living on Athenas?"
"Yeah. I have to." Maya replied. "Otherwise, who knows what could happen? I don't want some corporation taking over my home."
"Fair point. I don't know if I could ever settle down, honestly." Axton said. "I mean, I've been on the move since I was sixteen years old. Planet to planet, campaign to campaign."
She chuckled. "You make it sound like I'm going to go soft."
"You? Going soft? Not likely." Axton said. "So we're just going to...call it quits?"
"I don't want to leave you just as much as you don't want to leave me, Axton." Maya said. "But I have to do this."
"I know you do." Axton said. "That doesn't mean I have to like it, though."
Maya took Axton's hand, interlacing her fingers in his. "It's alright, Ax. We'll find each other."
He smiled, his eyes meeting hers across the table. "I hope so."
Farewells were brief. Four Hyperion ships, courtesy of a recently blackmailed CEO Blake, sat in front of Ellie's garage in the Dust. Lilith, Brick, Mordecai, Tina, Hammerlock, each of the Vault Hunters' friends wore bittersweet smiles as they said goodbye to four of their friends.
Salvador and Krieg, who were remaining on Pandora, gave their farewells to Gaige. Maya was hugging Marcus. Zer0 faced Axton.
"It's been fun, buddy. I hope I see you around sometime."
"The same to you, / my commando compadre. / I shall miss this place." the assassin replied.
Axton spread his arms, moving closer to Zer0.
"Come on, man. Bring it in."
Zer0 didn't move. Axton stood there, awaiting a hug awkwardly.
"Let's go. Don't make this weird."
Zer0 still didn't move.
"Ouch, man." Axton said, extending a hand. "Handshake?"
Zer0 took his hand, flashing him a :'-) on his helmet.
"You are a good man. / I'm proud to call you my friend. / I wish you the best."
Zer0 tugged Axton closer to him, continuing in a lower voice. He tilted his head towards Maya, who now embraced a rather surprised Zed.
"You love her, don't you? / Invite me to the wedding. / I'll be the best man."
Axton flashed Zer0 a smile. "Nothing gets past you, does it? I'll keep you in the loop."
Next, Axton said goodbye to Gaige. He hugged the teenager, noticing her fighting back tears.
"It's alright, kiddo. If you ever need anything, you give me a call, alright?" he said.
Gaige smiled, putting on a stiff upper lip. "As if I would need your help and not the other way around." she replied.
"Oh, be quiet, you big dork." he replied, messing up her red hair.
Next was Salvador. The little man lifted Axton in the air, and Axton felt like his ribs were going to break from the sheer force of the hug.
Axton and Krieg then looked at each other, Axton reaching a hand up towards the big man and resting it on his shoulder.
"Hey, buddy." he said as the lunatic stared down at him. "I'll miss you, man."
"Hate is love. Sadness is joy." Krieg replied. "What joyful music we've made!"
Axton flashed the psycho a smile. "You can say that again."
After Zer0 and Gaige had taken their shuttles and left, after everyone had gone back to Sanctuary, after the sun had set and the Dust went quiet, the Siren and the Commando stood under the Pandoran moon, embracing each other tightly. Axton held her with one arm, the other hand tangled in her blue hair.
"Don't get yourself killed, you big idiot." Maya said.
"Would you be mad at me if I did?" he replied.
"You have no idea." she replied.
They kissed, eyes shut and arms wrapped tight around each other. Axton pulled away, cupping her face in his hands.
"Maya, I'm sorry I never said this before, but I think..." he said, trying to put his thoughts into a sentence. "I think I might love you a little bit."
"I think I might love you a little bit too." she said, grabbing his hand as she pulled out of the embrace. "Come see me on Athenas some time, will you?" she asked.
"Count on it." he said, flashing her a bittersweet look as they turned from each other, boarding their ships, trying to keep the other out of their thoughts as they sought out their own uncertain destinies.