Georgie had gone back into her room, saying she had a book report due the next day. But Lou knew there was nothing due at school tomorrow, and that Georgie just wanted some privacy, some time alone to process everything. Lou allowed her daughter the time she needed. She needed to do the same. Should I go talk to Georgie? No...we'll just argue, and she doesn't need that right now.
Georgie wanted Lou to leave Warren. Truth be told, so did she...but she couldn't. There was no way of knowing how he'd react, or if he'd even let her go. That would definitely make things worse, and Lou didn't know what she'd do if he got mad and hurt her, or worse, hurt her family.
Lou was standing in front of her dresser, looking at herself in the mirror. She studied her face. It was tired and thin, and she looked like she had been drained of blood. But there was no reason for that. She was fine, right? She continued to stare, continued to scrutinize. Where was the woman who always spoke her mind? Where was the woman who would never stand any injustice done to her? That woman was gone, Lou decided, and Lou was done searching for her. This was her new self, the Lou she'd have to get used to if she wanted to be safe around Warren, if she wanted to keep her family out of harm's way. So yes, she'd take his abuse if it meant he didn't lay a hand on her daughters. But there was no knowing how far he'd go; Lou barely knew him.
She pulled her shirt sleeve up to reveal the bruises he gave her only a week ago. They had gotten into an argument, and she said the wrong thing at the wrong time, and he was provoked. He grabbed onto her arms, squeezing them tight and not letting go. Lou remembered whimpering, crying out in pain, "You're hurting me. Warren, please stop." And he just looked back at her, not showing any emotion. The apathy on his face unnerved Lou more than what he was actually doing. She had been left feeling breathless and her heartbeat was rocketing. She was gasping for air when something in his demeanor shifted. He was suddenly concerned for her, asking if she needed something, and that he was sorry.
Lou scowled and roughly brought her sleeve back down. She suddenly remembered the new marks, and she knew she had to hide them. She took her foundation and quickly dabbed some makeup onto her neck. There, she was all set...but what if the family noticed the makeup? What if they wondered why it was there? Lou pulled open her wardrobe and pulled out a high neck sweater. This brought her double assurance of no one being able to see through the facade.
Georgie would definitely notice, but that wouldn't make a difference as she already knew the truth. It might make her more agitated though, seeing her mom being extra careful with her dress choice. Lou knew Georgie wanted to tell someone else about the situation, but Lou had made her promise against it, and her daughter had agreed. But Lou worried how long she would comply with this promise.
Lou remembered the first time she had met Warren. It was at Maggie's. He was so charming and he was so engaging. She had noticed something was off about him, though. She wasn't sure what it was, and she couldn't pinpoint it, so she had chosen to ignore it. Lou felt it was her imagination, that it was just because this was her first time dating after the separation, that the weird vibe she was getting from being with him was coming from her, and that it was her fault. She now realized she should've followed her instinct. It would've saved her the heartache, all the sleepless nights, all that restlessness and constant fear.
Lou figured maybe she deserved the pain he was causing her...after the separation, Lou hadn't felt like herself. She felt as if her failed marriage dictated that every other part of her life was a failure. This new Lou deserved to be treated this way, and so she never fought back. But, no matter how worthless she felt as an individual, she was still a mother, and she knew that that woman needed to be kept safe for two reasons: Georgie and Katie.
Sometimes Lou wished her daughter wasn't so perceptive and all-knowing about everything. Yes, now she had someone who knew her secret, who could help her if she needed it, but….this was her daughter. Her young daughter who had already been through so much in her life, and she didn't deserve any more heartache. Lou knew she had to protect Georgie and Katie at all costs, no matter what. She would not let them get hurt. She knew she had to end things with Warren, even if that came at a price to her own safety.