A/N: Heads up, guys! I am in the process of moving to a new state and getting settled elsewhere. This means that the next update may be a little on the late side. I am going to do my best to try and get it as on time as i possibly can, but I just wanted to warn you ahead of time that it may be a few days late okay? This one is a long one so i hope that makes up for it! Love y'all!

Chapter #07:

Let Sleeping Sleeper Agents Lie

"Some people are just born to fight, I think.

It's not that they're born brave. It's not that they're born strong. It's just that the universe has decided that this one, this one will have grit and fire and steel in their blood. And it'll be tested, this cosmic mettle of theirs. They'll face trial after trial, be broken and damaged in countless ways.

But this one was born to fight. Maybe it's not the life they would have chosen. Maybe they'd love to lay down their arms. But they were born to fight. It's what they know. It's what they do best. It's all they can do."

"You're doing fantastic, Sergeant Barnes." The young, dark haired woman hummed happily while working his shoulder in different directions. She was a physical therapist that Dr. Helen Cho had sent from her facility in Korea.

"I think it's more accurate to say you're doing fantastic, Jenny. You're the one doing all the work." Bucky chuckled and he scrunched his nose when the woman pushed his shoulder into a more stiff position. Even after a week of this there were still spots where the scar tissue was thick enough to cause pain. Though, according to Jenny, that would fade with time and exercise. Especially once he was able to move it on his own. "And how many times do I gotta ask you to just call me Bucky, sweetheart?

Jenny chuckled, "Always one time more, Sergeant Barnes."

Bucky let his eyes drift over the rest of the room. He was in the training gym with many of the others. Sam was in the far right corner working with Pietro though now it looked more like he was lecturing the poor kid. Clint was shooting arrows casually, Natasha was correcting Wanda's fighting stance, and Steve was sparring with Aj.

Concern had washed over him at the start, but it quickly faded as he watched the two of them fight one another. Steve didn't throw his full weight into every hit, he held back, but Aj was too quick for him to get the opportunity to hit her often anyways. She used his size and weight against him. Now, despite his new bulky body, Steve was still pretty nimble and quick. Bucky always said he fought like he was a dancer, always light on his feet, but Aj knew how to read a fight. She saw his plan of attack before he even begun to make a move and that was how she was able to continue slipping out of his grip.

Bucky had only seen her fight once. It was the fight in Russia, and she had been dangerous and wild with her attacks. Watching her fight with all her energy and her wits about her was like a work of art. Aj was incredible.

Steve managed to get a hand on Aj, but she wrapped her hands around his neck and swung around him as hard as she could. She managed to get one leg around his shoulders in a very Black Widow-esque move, but when Aj went to throw him to the ground she couldn't stick the landing so they both crumpled to the ground in a pile of tangled limbs.

"You're not supposed to let the enemy fall on top of you, Aj. It defeats the purpose." Natasha barked out to her. Aj and Steve burst into laughter and Bucky tore his gaze away from them. He had been careful around Aj since the surgery.

Bucky kept his hands to himself, bit back any words that could be perceived as suggestive or flirty in any way possible and made sure they never ended up alone together. Every once in a while, he'd be tempted to break this new mental vow he made but all he needed to do was take a look at the lingering bruise on her arm and he'd remember why he was doing this in the first place.

"My new tactic is to fall so pathetically that the enemy feels sorry for me and just gives up." Aj joked from the ground where she still laid. She pushed herself up and glanced over at Steve who was staring at her like she hung the stars. "Steven, do you feel sorry enough to throw in the towel right now?"

"Absolutely." Steve replied without missing a beat.

"See." Aj threw a hand up toward Natasha. "Foolproof."

Bucky chuckled under his breath and tore his eyes away from them. Jenny worked with his shoulder for another ten minutes or so before calling it. He stood up and took the sweat towel he had been using when he worked out off his thigh and flipped it over his shoulder.

"Thanks again, Jenny." He gave her a firm smile.

Jenny set a hand on his right hand, "Of course. I'll see you same time tomorrow?"

"I'll be here." Bucky shrugged.

The young woman walked away, and Bucky turned to head to where the others were still sparring. Even walking was different now. Without the heavy metal arm constantly dragging him towards the left, he had to readjust his gait to try and get used to not having something pulling him down. Still, he had absolutely zero complaints. The gauze had been taken off ages ago and he was no longer ashamed to look at his left shoulder. The shoulder piece they had put in was black and silver. The skin around it was still scarred, nothing would fix that, but the irritation had calmed. His scars were turning pale. The older ones and the new ones from the surgery.

"Okay, no more messing around with Captain America." Natasha snatched Aj's attention away from Steve. The blond walked over to him and slapped him on the arm asking him our physical therapy was. "You're gonna fight Wanda now."

Aj let out a loud laugh, "I will not. I can't hit Wanda."

"Who said I would let you hit me?" Wanda questioned with a raised eyebrow.

The teen held out her hand and red energy bounced between them. Aj set a hand on her chest and leaned back with a frown, "Whoa, whoa. This is a power free fight… right?"

"If you get attacked by an inhuman out in public are you just gonna ask them not to use their powers on you?" Natasha questioned.

Aj crossed her arms and scrunched up her nose once, "Maybe."

"Don't worry." Wanda winked at Aj jokingly, "I will go easy on you, Aj."

Steve nudged him in the side, "You done working out or can you spot me?"

Bucky rubbed the back of his neck curled one side of his lip up with a shrug, "I, uh, kinda wanna see how this goes." Steve raised his eyebrows and he motioned to the women again with half a shrug. "What?"

The both of them backed up and Natasha strolled over to stand between them as Aj and Wanda faced off against one another. Steve leaned toward the red head, his arms crossed, "Are you sure this is a good idea?"

"No." Natasha replied simply.

They circled each other once before Aj lunged forward with her knee. Wanda took a quick step back held her hands up. A red glow encircled Aj's leg and when Wanda threw her hands forward Aj went flying back. She flipped once in the air and slammed into mat face down. Aj let out a low groan of pain and Steve tried to rush forward. Bucky threw out his right arm to catch his friend before he got very far. Steve gave him a confused look, but Bucky just shook his head as Natasha smirked.

Aj let out another groan and Wanda ran forward panicked, apologies falling from her lips. When she knelt down to check on the fallen woman, Aj sprung up, shoved her shoulder into Wanda's midsection, then hooked her hands around her calves. Aj stood up and flipped Wanda over her shoulder so the teen landed on her back with a grunt.

"There's no room for kindness in a fight, Wanda." Aj brushed off her hands and Bucky smirked to himself. "You always gotta—oof." A blast of red knocked Aj to the ground but she rolled to her feet just as Wanda got back up to hers with a smile. "Well, shit, kid."

"I do not think you should monologue during a fight either?" Wanda joked.

"Low blow." Aj replied and lunged forward again. The two women went back and forth, trading blows. It took her a couple minutes, and a few hard hits, but Aj finally read the fight. She picked up the pattern and suddenly began to duck under blasts of red that Wanda fired off at her.

Bucky leaned toward Natasha as they continued to fight, "Did you teach her that?"

Natasha shook her head with a proud smirk, "You can't teach intuition."

"She can read a fight so fast." Bucky mumbled.

"You wanna know the craziest part?" Natasha asked. He nodded once. "She has no idea that she can do that. When Clint and I asked her about it, Aj had no idea what we were talking about. She just…gets lost in the fight."

Bucky tilted his head curiously. Aj was a natural. It wasn't all that surprising. There was some degree of skill that couldn't be taught. It was the little things like Steve naturally having dancer like movements that couldn't be mimicked. It was like Sam naturally knowing which air current to follow when he had his wings out. It was like how when he first picked up a rifle he just seemed to know what the wind was going to do to his bullet's path.

It was like Aj was born with the fight in her blood. As if every part of her was built to wage a war. The battle was who she was, and it was part of what made her all the more impressive. He watched as she helped Wanda back up to her feet with a grin that filled the room with light. As tough as she was, she had an equal, if not greater, aptitude for kindness and love.

Tony was talking. I knew that. I was aware of that. His voice was hard to entirely drown out, but every word went right over my head. My hair was still wet from the shower I had just hopped out of. The impromptu training session had lasted much longer than it probably should've. Dr. Strange would be here any minute now to talk about the next surgery lined up for Bucky. I was worried about the anesthesia again, but Wanda seemed sure that she could handle it this time. I was kind of surprised she was willing to go through that again. The teen seemed sure of herself though. Although Pietro demanded to be in the room when his sister did this next time. Understandably so.

I wondered where Bucky was right now. He said he'd be here for the meeting, but there was still no sight of him. He had been kind of odd lately. Not distant, per say, but… muted? No matter how much I pushed I could never get him to interact with me like he used to. It was like we had taken a step backwards and I couldn't understand why.

"Hey!" Tony clapped and I jumped in my seat. "I know you got lover boy on the brain, but can you spare me an ounce of your attention and love? I'm being neglected."

"Then fly out to Pepper." I replied with a glare.

"She's busy with that conference thing. If I distract her at all in the next three days she'll castrate me." Tony shrugged. "Now, did you hear anything I said before?"

I shook my head, "Nope."

Tony groaned and took my face in his hands. He squished my cheeks together and kept me from pulling away. Tony spoke slowly, "It's time to plan the birthday bash."

"What birthday—" I slapped his hands off me and tried again, "What birthday bash?"

"My birthday is May 29th and I'm turning 31." Tony said and I let out a loud laugh at his blatant lie about his age. Tony flicked my ear, ignoring my snickers, and kept going, "And the twins turn 18 on the 30th. So, I figure, joint birthday party."

I rolled my eyes, "I don't think the twins will like the kind of party you tend to throw for your birthday. Plus, we're trying to keep a low profile. The world doesn't need to find out about the twins, Bucky, and Star just because you wanted to throw a rager."

"Can you give me, like, a little credit?" Tony scoffed. "I know all of that which is why this year I think it should be a family only affair." I tilted my head curiously and motioned for him to go on. "We fly out to my private island—"

"God, you would have a private island."

"We fly out there on the 28th, then on the 29th we celebrate me," Tony set his hands on his chest, "And on the 30th we celebrate the twins. Then we come home on the 31st."

I nodded in consideration. It actually wasn't a bad idea at all. I wanted to throw the twins some kind of party or do something special for them, and this definitely fit those requirements. I played with the bracelet on my wrist, "Could the Avengers take a four day holiday?"

"Probably. We stopped that inhuman from destroying LA. That fills our quota for crazy shit this month, right?"

"Well not anymore since you just said that." I mumbled. The Avengers had been called out to California five days ago because some lava spewing inhuman was tearing apart downtown LA and the authorities couldn't stop him. It wasn't too bad of a mission, they were only gone for the day, and everyone had come back mostly harm free. It had been weird sitting in the Compound with Bucky, the twins, and Star just watching it all unfold on TV though.

Tony shrugged, "Coulson can babysit the world for us while we roast a pig on the beach."

"I guess. I assume you have a ginormous, sprawling mansion out on your island for us to stay in."

"Duh." He replied. "It'll fit the whole crew and—"

"There's a guest waiting for you in the auditorium, Boss." FRIDAY interrupted him.

I stood up, "Probably Strange. Didn't we tell him he could come up here?"

"Send him up, FRIDAY."

"Boss, it isn't Dr. Strange." FRIDAY replied. Tony questioned the AI and she answered quickly, "It's the King of Wakanda."

Tony and I immediately stiffened in our spots and shared a look of absolute panic with one another. The King? The King of Wakanda was here? Tony groaned, "Oh, Pepper is gonna be so pissed when I call and tell her I've made royalty hate me."

"We gotta go see him." I said quickly then glanced between the two of us. Tony had on jeans and one of his work shirts. I was wearing jean shorts and a loose tank top. "We have to change. We have to change now."

"And make him wait?"

I shook my head, "We can't talk to a King looking like this, tin can!"

Tony opened his mouth to argue then let out a frustrated growl, "FRIDAY send in somebody with food and drinks ASAP."

Then we were running. As we sprinted to the private side of the building we got looks from just about anyone we passed. Sam asked us what the hell was going on when we pushed past him to get to the stairs up to our apartments. Tony yelled for me to meet him in front of the auditorium and to hurry my ass up.

I ran into my apartment and started stripping off my clothes as I went. It only took me a couple minutes to pull on a dress and twist my hair up into a clean bun. There really was no time for anything more than that. I threw on some heels and I was running again. In fact, running was an understatement. I was racing to the auditorium in my heels, and I gave myself a second to admire the fact that I had come so far.

Day one of being a PA, I couldn't take a step in the damn things and now here I was in a full-on sprint.

Tony was standing outside the door in his suit, and he waved me over as if I wasn't running to him already, "What took you so long?"

"I got ready in under five minutes." I said quickly.

"That was four minutes too long. Were you—"

"No time for snark." I interrupted and pulled him into the auditorium.

The second we stepped into the room, two spears snapped in front of us stopping our path. Tony and I both stiffened, now in defensive positions, and on edge. The spear holders were tall women with shaved heads and dressed in traditional African clothes that seemed to double as some armor. Their faces were drawn in matching, solemn intimidation.

"This is not how I thought I was gonna die." Tony whispered to me and I resisted the urge to slam my elbow into his side. The sound of a language I didn't recognize called out from across the room and the women snapped back to attention, lowering their spears. I glanced down the aisle to find the sound of the voice and my eyes landed on two well-dressed men. One was much older than the other, but there was something in their features that seemed to match. Father and son, I assumed. That meant King and King to be.

Wow, we really stepped in it.

The older man was chubbier with graying hair and a matching goatee. He wore glasses and a black suit, and his hands were clasped in front of him, one hand casually twisting a ring he wore on the other. The young man beside him stood tall in a blue suit with his hands held behind his back.

"Tony Stark." The older man, the King, said in his heavily accented voice.

We hurried down the aisle to meet them where they stood surrounded by more intimidating women with matching spears. Tony nodded with a tight smile and offered his hand, "Your majesty." He shook the young man's hand as well then motioned to me. "This is my associate Aj Bradshaw."

"It's great—er, it's lovely to meet y'all." I greeted. "Sorry for the wait."

"Not at all." The King chuckled. "We appreciate the food and drinks you served us." He motioned to the small cart of various fancy, snack foods and drinks. The King then motioned to the man beside him. "This is my son T'Challa."

"Your majesty, we—" Tony began.

The King held his hand out and interrupted him, "Please. You may call me T'Chaka."

I was most definitely not about to refer to a literal King by his first name. In fact, I didn't actually know what to do at all. I was frozen in my spot like a deer in the headlights. Tony gave another smile. The tightness in it being the only clue I had that he felt as uncomfortable as I did right now. At least he could find it in himself to actually talk though.

"I'd like to speak to you, Mr. Stark." King T'Chaka glanced at me, "Perhaps Ms. Bradshaw can take my son on a tour of the compound?"

"Baba…" T'Challa turned and mumbled skeptically.

Tony nodded, "Of course. Aj?"

"Uh, yeah." I pasted on a bright grin and motioned for the man to follow me, "One tour coming right up."

T'Challa shot his father one more look before following after me. A few of the armed women tried to follow but he spoke to them in his native language, and they fell back to stay with his father. The two of us stepped out of the auditorium and though I no longer had the King's gaze on me I still felt super awkward. How were you supposed to speak to royalty? Was I supposed to avert my eyes?

"Your majesty—" I began and T'Challa raised an eyebrow at me, I quickly course corrected, "…Highness? Er—no, uh, your grace?" His lips twitched up and I cleared my throat, "Sir, is there any part of the Compound you'd like to see specifically?"

T'Challa shook his head and when he spoke his voice was smooth and calm, "No. I would like to stay close to the auditorium since my father is there."

I nodded, "Yeah—I mean, yes. I can do that. I can show you…" My eyes narrowed as I realized I didn't actually know much about this part of the Compound. I rarely came over here. "…the vending machines?"

T'Challa chuckled, "Am I the first person of royal blood you have ever spoken to?"

"Wow, yeah, is it—is it that painfully obvious?" I grimaced.

"Hardly noticeable." T'Challa smiled. He was polite, but I could see the tension in his frame. I wondered if it was from being away from his father or if it was because Tony and I stole vibranium? Maybe both?

I began to lead him towards the lobby, "Tell me, do princes drink coffee?"

He chuckled once and I led him over to where Sal's new little coffee stand was. Sal didn't actually work at it very often anymore since the Compound was such a drive from the city where he lived, but Tony let him open a branch of his little shop here. Usually, Sal came and worked on Mondays. Any other time it was just his employees. I bought us both a cup and when they came out I handed one to T'Challa. He took it from me with a quiet thanks and continued to glance around the large, busy lobby.

"So, uh, respectfully," I shifted awkwardly where I stood and T'Challa looked at me curiously, "How pissed is your dad at us?" I was caught off guard when he chuckled. "Just…curious."

T'Challa narrowed his eyes at me, but not in an unfriendly manner. More curious himself. "Tony Stark originally planned on returning our missing vibranium, but instead reported it stolen then contacted us stating he used it." He hummed once. "I am curious as to why he went through all of that?"

"Good question." I twisted my lips. "We were going to return it, but then we found…we found a use for it. And we have no excuse for what we did we just…" T'Challa was listening to me intently and I saw this as my chance, "People assume Tony is selfish and that's why shit like this happens, but it couldn't be further from the truth. He's' actually just a big idiot." He raised an eyebrow at me, and I continued, "Tony gets lost in his projects. He was trying to help…to help someone I really care about and that's why he used the vibranium. He doesn't think about the consequences he just—just saw the vibranium as the best material to save my friend and didn't hesitate to use it and for that I am so sorry."

T'Challa nodded to me, "You're sorry?"

I grimaced, "Yeah, because it's my fault. I caught this early enough to have been able to send it back, but… but I was the one who was selfish. I pushed for us to use it even knowing what the consequences were."

"What exactly did you use the vibranium for?" T'Challa questioned.

I weighed the pros and cons of the decision in my brain then made the gut call to tell the truth, "A shoulder. My friend was… tortured." T'Challa's eyebrows furrowed. "He was a prisoner of war and he…he lost his arm. Tony created a shoulder piece that we put into him so he'll be able to use a prosthetic arm in the future. We used the last bit of vibranium to coat it so it wouldn't tarnish."

"I see." He replied and glanced away from me. T'Challa lifted his cup to his lips. After a pause, he spoke up again, "I am sorry for your friend. How is he now?"

I couldn't help but smile at the question, "Really good. The surgery went great, he's done a week of PT already and—and he's not in pain anymore. Best case scenario."

"Good." T'Challa nodded.

"Again, I'm sorry we—"

"Ms. Bradshaw, boss needs you back in the auditorium." FRIDAY chimed from above us.

I motioned for T'Challa to follow me again, "That was quick. Is that a good sign or a bad one?"

The prince gave me a tight-lipped smile and I wasn't sure if that was a good or bad thing. We walked back the way we came silently. I had pleaded my case and there wasn't much more I could say on the matter. When we arrived back into the auditorium my eyes immediately landed on Tony and I looked for signs on how this was going. He didn't look happy and that was worrisome. As we got near, the King began to speak but surprisingly T'Challa interrupted him in their language.

King T'Chaka shook his head, replying firmly, but T'Challa didn't relent. Tony shot me a confused glance and I just shrugged once. I was just as clueless as him right now. There was another brief pause before the King turned to look at us and we both stiffened under his gaze.

"My son tells me a bit of grace should be considered. An olive branch, of sorts." King T'Chaka said slowly. He gave us a soft smile, "I trust my son's judgement."

Tony let out a sigh of relief, "Your majesty, we are beyond grateful. Please allow me to repay you for what we used. Name the price."

"We do not accept charity or any sort of aid, Mr. Stark." King T'Chaka replied. "We only ask that a situation like this never arise again."

Tony nodded, "Of course. Next time we plan to steal from you we will ask first."

"Jesus Christ, Tony." I pinched the bridge of my nose. The King spoke and the speared women began to lead him out. We walked out behind them to say final good-byes and apologies. The town car that had brought them to the Compound was still parked out front. Before they could slip away, I clasped my hands together and stepped toward T'Challa, "Thank you so much, Prince T'Challa. I don't have much to my name, but I owe you everything."

T'Challa chuckled, "How could I not stand up for you when the vibranium is being used so honorably? You obviously care very greatly for the man you spoke of. I wish all of you only the best."

"Ditto." I replied with a thumbs up.

"'Ditto'? Really?" Tony mumbled to me while we waved good-bye to the town car, "Can you please act like we've talked to royalty before?"

I kept my smile on my face while waving but spoke between clenched teeth, "Don't make me beat your ass outside your own Compound."

We both let out a sigh of relief when the town car faded from view. That was a close damn call. In fact, it felt like we had dodged that bullet just by the skin of our teeth. Tony turned to me with a smirk, "That was fun."

Bucky wasn't a huge fan of this Stephen Strange guy. He was kind of an asshole, but he was definitely a genius and was willing to help. Bucky could hardly get picky at this point. Although, it was kind of fun to watch Aj go toe to toe with the neurosurgeon. Her and Tony had come in from some other meeting to discuss his next surgery and, like always, Aj was a storm of organized chaos.

"Quick question, will you remove the stick from your ass for the surgery or…?" Aj asked.

Strange narrowed his eyes at her, "How can somebody so small be so annoying? Do you practice at it, Stark Jr.?"

"I do actually. Every night before bed I run through the top ten hits of the most annoying things I could possibly say." Aj replied. "I'm sure you do something similar, but with ways to be an absolute dickhead."

Tony was doing something to his back. Trying to scan something? He hadn't taken the time to explain it in detail and Bucky wish he had. It wasn't that he didn't trust the genius. At this point, he owed the man so much it was ridiculous. Bucky was just curious about the science behind it. It was wild how far things had come, and he loved hearing about it.

Strange scoffed, "You have an odd way of showing your appreciation."

"And you have the bedside manner of a feral badger. We all have our crosses to bear."

Bucky chuckled to himself and he heard Tony laugh behind him too. Strange and Aj were so caught up in one upping each other in their argument that they didn't even notice them. Tony hummed once and came around to stand in front of him again.

"Aj's a lot of things, but subtle is not one." Tony said.

Bucky nodded with a smile, "She's a firecracker that's for sure." He stared at the man who was playing with a remote shaped idea in his hands. "Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah, it's a thing-a-ma-jig." Tony held it up slightly. "No real name yet. Basically, it's a fancy metal detector mixed with a nerve conductor. I'm gonna see which nerves are real and still working and which parts are straight up fake."

Bucky blinked, "Oh wow. That's amazing, and you made it from scratch?"

"I didn't create the base technology, but I did make it do what we needed it to do." Tony shrugged. "Never would've had you pegged as a science nerd, Barnes."

"How'd you—"

"You don't just pay attention to what's gonna happen to you. You listen to the specifics. The details." Tony answered.

Bucky chuckled to himself at the answer. Stark was an observant guy. He knew that, but it was interesting to see firsthand. That hadn't been his question though. Not right now. He shook his head, "Actually, I wanted to ask you something else." Tony motioned for him to continue. "Why don't you hate me? It seems like you're more pissed at Steve than me and I—" Bucky's words caught in his throat. "What I did—"

"I am more pissed at Rogers." Tony said simply and his eyes widened. Tony shrugged and set down the invention in his hands to cross his arms, "The Winter Soldier killed my mom." Tony's eyebrows furrowed and his jaw clenched. "But… You saved Aj. That was enough for me to not kill you on sight. Looking at you now, you're obviously fucked in the head, no offense."

"None taken." Bucky couldn't deny that. He was still confused though. "But Steve?"

"Rogers lied to me." Tony replied bluntly. "For 7 months. He lied to me about—" The man's face twisted in irritation before leveling out. "Don't worry, Barnes. I'm probably not gonna kill you in the middle of the night anymore." Before Bucky could reply, the man whipped around. "Are the two of you done with your pissing contest yet?"

Aj and Strange froze mid-argument. She shrugged and glanced back at Strange before looking to Tony, "Uh, I don't think so? No, right? Maybe five or ten more minutes?"

"You are incredibly vexing."

"Oh my God." Aj put a hand on her chest with a grin, "How did you guess my middle name like that?"

Tony snapped his fingers a few times at Aj then pointed to the door. She shot the man a glare, but Tony just raised his eyebrows at her. Aj rolled her eyes moving to the door, but she stopped to give him a quick smile. Bucky lifted his hand to give her a slight wave before she strolled out of the lab. Strange grumbled under his breath and came over to stand by Tony. Bucky's eyes drifted back to the doors even though Aj was beyond his sightline. Strange and Tony began to discuss his spine and though it was an important conversation for him to pay attention to, Bucky found himself losing focus.

I still wore the casual white dress that I had put on to meet the King of Wakanda, but I had ditched the heels pretty quick. The cost of me being too lazy to walk upstairs and change out of this dress and grab some new shoes was the curious gaze of everyone I passed. I was strolling down the halls to get to the Avengers locker room which was over by the training gym. According to Vision and the twins, that's where the others were. They were probably busy, but since they were away from Wanda and Pietro this would be a perfect time to talk to them about the upcoming birthday bash.

In order to get into the locker room I had to press my hand against a lock by the door. FRIDAY scanned me and then popped the locks so I could breeze in. This was where they kept their gear and weapons so it made sense that it was extra secured. Clint had his feet on a shelf in his own personal locker in a poor attempt to climb up it so he could try and grab something from the top of the tall box. It didn't even give me pause though. Towards the center of the room, Natasha, Sam, and Steve were talking to a face I vaguely recognized.

"Aj, hey." Steve greeted and motioned me to come over without hesitation.

As I got closer, I tried to pin down why I recognized the blonde they were talking to. Her dirty blonde hair went a little past her shoulders with dark eyes. She had been smiling when I walked in, but now she wore a concentrated look of distaste. It was a look I for sure recognized. Whoever this was didn't trust me.

"Aj this is—"

"We've met." The woman gave me a tight-lipped smile as she interrupted Steve. I raised an eyebrow at the comment, but she continued. "She's the little girl who ruined one of my missions."

My lips curled up in a smirk as I finally placed her face. She had been the one I fought the night I met Clint and Natasha. I had no hard feelings, but I sure as hell didn't like her tone or the nickname she decided to saddle me with. I kept my elbow bent at my side and pointed at her with a loose wrist, "And you're the chick I beat the shit outta in the ring that one time. Long time no see, newbie."

"You got lucky." She replied.

I shrugged, "If that's what you've been telling yourself the last few months to help you sleep at night then by all means don't let me ruin that coping mechanism for you."

"As much as I would love to watch this play out," Sam motioned between the two of us, "Sharon is here to give us the latest update on what's happening up on capitol hill."

"Well, it's capitol hill. I assume they're doing dumb shit." I crossed my arms.

"You're not wrong." Natasha chuckled.

Steve set his hand on my lower back, not an unusual thing for him to do, but I noticed the way Sharon's eyes lingered on the motion for a second too long. Interesting. They continued to talk about what they had been before I walked in. Sharon didn't say much, it was mostly my three friends talking, but I wondered if that was because of me or if she was just the quiet kind.

"You have lunch yet?" Steve turned and asked me.

I shook my head, "No, I got distracted by the King of Wakanda."

"Huh?" Clint whipped around in surprise and the motion caused the locker to tilt over and land on top of him. He groaned in pain while the others just gave me curious looks.

"Long story." I waved them off. "Clint, you alive?"

"No." He groaned.

Sam peeled off from the group to help his fellow bird man. Sharon clapped her hands together and shot me a smile, "I was actually hoping to meet you officially, Aj. Any way I can steal you away for a second to talk?"

"I would love that." I said in an over-exaggerated fashion. Steve shot Sharon a critical look but it faded when I turned to face him, "Afterwards, me and you can go out into the city for lunch?"

Steve's eyes widened, "Uh, okay. Yeah."

"Wear your best city clothes." I tapped him on the chest, "Inara says we gotta stage a breakup."

The blond blinked in confusion but didn't linger on it. He turned around to help Sam drag a moaning and dramatic Clint out of the locker room. Natasha still stood beside me and I was surprised to see her staring at Sharon with nearly the same look Steve had. Did they know what she wanted to talk to me about?

"I'll be in your apartment picking out your date outfit." Natasha said without looking away from Sharon.

"It's not a real date. It's a fake date where I plan to fake breakup with him." I mumbled. "So do we really need a whole new outfit?"

Natasha finally turned to look at me and she gave me a smile, "If you're going to breakup with Captain America, I am going to make sure you look good doing it." She glanced back at the other woman with a nod. "Sharon."

"Nat." Sharon nodded in return.

The redhead slipped out of the room and for a moment the two of us just stared at one another. It reminded me of the ring, but only because I could recognize when someone was trying to size me up. My initial reaction was to want to antagonize her more. That's what I usually did when I noticed someone wasn't a fan of me. Understandably. This was different though. This was an agent of SHIELD and a friend to my friends. I would hold off on being a dick. For now at least.

"Is this the part where I speak first, or do you speak first?" I broke the silence.

"I don't trust you."

I raised my eyebrows with a low whistle, "Wow. Shocking. That's a plot twist I did not see coming." I stepped toward her slightly. "Quick question, is this because I kicked your ass that one time? It wasn't personal, you know?"

"HYRDA supposedly wants you and your sister—"

I mumbled, "I don't think the word supposedly is supposed to be there."

"—and all we really know is that you've been involved in a lot of strange coincidences."

"I don't believe in coincidences." I shrugged.

"Then how do you explain the fact that you just so happened to be there the night Natasha and Clint came into the ring? Or that you just so happened to be in the same Russian bunker as James Buchanan Barnes? You also just so happened to find him again in Romania while everyone was out fighting Ultron. The same trip where you then boarded a plane with the man working with Strucker—"

I twisted my lips, "Boarded with him is a stretch. That was hostage situation."

"And now here you are with access to every inch of the Compound, including Stark's lab and the Avenger conference rooms, and you also have your hand in creating Sergeant Barnes' new arm. It seems to me like you ended up exactly where you need to be." Sharon finished.

"Are you insinuating that I'm HYDRA?" I scoffed. "Because you forget the two separate occasions where I was close to death in that little spiel of yours."

Sharon shrugged, "And yet you didn't die."

Okay, admittedly, when she laid it all out like that it definitely sounded sketchy. Giving her my own spiel about fate and my belief in it didn't seem like a solid alibi either. I crossed my arms tightly over my chest and shook my head, "What exactly are you trying to say to me?"

"I'm saying that I think the Avengers are too close to this to see anything objectively. You're charming and very good at breaking down walls and pulling people in."

"Hah. Jokes on you because that is not something I am known for."

Sharon's features didn't change, "I just want you to know that I'm watching. For their sake, I hope they're right and I hope you are exactly what they think you are."

She walked past me toward the door, and it took a second for my thoughts to catch up to my actions. I quickly whipped around and called out to her, "What exactly do they think I am?"

"Family." Sharon glanced over her shoulder at me briefly before disappearing out the door. For a moment, I lingered in the locker room alone. Sharon was a really good agent because suddenly I was questioning my own motives.

Maybe this would be easier if I did believe in coincidences.

Muneeba Khan enjoyed her work. She truly had a passion for what she did. Everybody was created for a reason, and she believed this was her reason. She was here to help people heal emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. Muneeba had been doing this for a very, very long time, but she had met her match with Bucky Barnes.

The man was broken. She could see it in his eyes. Nightmares plagued him and his own thoughts poisoned his view of himself. Nobody was more cruel than an internal voice, and Bucky's internal voice was his worst enemy.

"We didn't get to talk about what happened after your surgery." Muneeba said softly. Bucky sat on the middle of the couch in her office with a tense frame. It was like he was preparing to jump out the window at a moment's notice. "I wanted to ask you about how you felt on the topic of that word. The word that shuts you down."

Bucky relaxed minutely, "Oh. I'm glad."

"Glad?"

"I… I'm happy about it." Bucky replied slowly. "It makes me feel better that they have a way to stop me if I…"

He didn't finish his thought and he didn't have to. Muneeba was already aware that his worst fear was doing harm to those around him. She nodded, "I suppose. But, I heard waking up from the word was difficult. Painful."

Bucky shrugged, "Left me with a headache. Body felt…wrong for a little while. Like I didn't fit into my own skin, but that's nothing compared to the damage I could cause." He met her gaze with determination, "Sam gave you a copy of what the word is, right? You know the word just—just in case."

Muneeba nodded at him. Sam had come down in person to tell her the word as a safety precaution. She really didn't think it would be necessary, but the Avengers were adamant. Bucky was adamant. His tense shoulders finally relaxed at the confirmation of knowing the word. Muneeba rolled the pen around in her hand, "I spoke to Wanda." The twins were also patients of hers. Tony Stark had been the one to suggest it and Muneeba liked working with them. She didn't often work with kids, but the two of them were mature for their age. Trauma could do that. "She told me about what she saw in your mind. Do you want to talk about it?"

"There isn't much to talk about." Bucky replied. "We already knew that I… We knew about the Soldier."

Muneeba hummed to herself. She set down the notebook in her lap and the pen she held so she could lean on her knees toward him, "Can I tell you what I think? Based on what I've heard so far?"

"Of course."

"I don't think it was the Soldier that attacked Wanda in your mind." Muneeba said and Bucky's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "This presence, it called itself 'Yakov'. It attacked Wanda and called her an intruder. Almost like…like it was trying to protect you."

Bucky narrowed his eyes, "Or he was trying to protect himself."

"He." Muneeba noticed. "You refer to it as a 'him'. Bucky, who is Yakov to you?"

He didn't answer immediately. Bucky sat in place, his gaze unfocused on something behind her, as he thought to himself. Muneeba didn't rush him. She settled in her own seat and patiently waited as the man gathered his own thoughts.

"He feels… I don't know. Real?" Bucky spoke cautiously. "I think—I think I've seen him before." Muneeba was surprised at this, but she didn't let it show on her face. "It was after I cut off contact with Aj. He's… I think Yakov wants to finish the last mission assigned to us."

She nodded, "I see."

"What do you think?" Bucky asked.

Muneeba hummed, "I don't think HYDRA created Yakov. I think you did." Bucky's eyes widened, pain flashed in them, and she held one hand out. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but the working theory is that the one word stops you. A 'kill switch' as Sam called it. But, the others activate you. They were used to control you."

"Yes." Bucky said, his voice rough with agony.

"I think those evil men put those words in your head to make you do what they wanted. To do those terrible things. They planted a seed that grew into a suffocating, poisonous plant." Muneeba spoke firmly. "But I think your mind, in an attempt to protect yourself, created this persona… this Yakov as a kind of barrier. We see it all the time in traumatic scenarios. The human mind will create an alternate personality of sorts in order to survive."

Bucky blinked in surprise, "You think…I created Yakov to protect myself?"

"He's mission oriented because if you didn't complete your mission, what would happen to you?"

His focus faded briefly before he answered, "I was punished."

Muneeba nodded, "It's why he's still so desperate to complete that last mission. To him, HYDRA isn't gone. He thinks if the mission isn't finished you will be punished. He's trying to protect you."

"I don't want that." Bucky snapped. His anger flaring out, "How do I make him stop? How do I get rid of him? I don't want him anymore. I don't need him!"

Muneeba sighed, "I know. I know you feel like that way. Some part of you though, still thinks he's necessary. Maybe it's because he knows those words are still in your head."

"If I get rid of the words, I get rid of him?"

"It isn't that black and white." Muneeba replied. "I wish I could give you a definite answer, but there isn't one. The human mind is so elastic. It's incredible what we can do, even unknowingly, to survive."

Bucky rubbed his face in exhaustion, "That's my new goal then? Get rid of the words? Since it's the only guess we even have?"

"No." Muneeba shook her head. "I don't think that should be the goal we focus on here. Did you think any on what I spoke to you about last week?"

Bucky nodded and he reached into his coat pocket with his only arm to grab a small notebook. He held it up to show her, but he didn't open it to her. "You asked what I wanted more than anything. I'm not sure if this beats out getting rid of Yakov." He spat the name out in annoyance. "But… I want to make amends. Fix the wrongs I created, and…help the ones I hurt."

"I think that's a very good idea." Muneeba agreed. "But I think we have one step to make before we can begin."

He looked confused, "What?"

"How can we expect to make amends with those around us, when you haven't even made amends with yourself, Bucky?" Muneeba asked. "You need to begin to forgive yourself, to trust yourself, before you can reach out to others. Focus on your own healing first."

Bucky shook his head, tucking his notebook back into his coat pocket, "That might take a very long time."

"All things that are worth it typically do." Muneeba replied with a warm, comforting smile.

Something was wrong.

He didn't know what, but something wasn't right.

Bucky glanced down at his hands. It took him a moment to realize what it was. He had two hands. One made of flesh, and one made of that polished silver. That was gone. That was supposed to be gone. Wasn't it? He tried to grasp at some clue in his head at what was going on, but like always he was left confused and frustrated. It always felt like he had something just in the periphery, but no matter how much he reached he could never quite grasp it.

His eyes drifted up from his hands and landed on a figure. This jogged something in his head. A memory. Something Wanda had said. Something Muneeba had elaborated on. The figure was him, but it wasn't him. Bucky couldn't personally pick out why, what detail set them apart, but he knew this wasn't himself.

"Yakov." Bucky said and the figure's head slowly titled just a bit. That was the name Wanda had pulled out of his head, right? That hadn't been what HYDRA had ever called him though. Nobody had ever referred to him with that name. What was it that Muneeba had said? Yakov was a split off of who he was. A creation of his own mind to protect himself. Bucky wasn't sure how much of that he actually fully believed yet.

The figure, Yakov apparently, nodded his head once with his eyes focused behind him. Hesitantly, Bucky turned around and the moment his eyes landed on Aj every other thought vanished. She was lying on the ground, motionless and pale, and it took Bucky only a second to freeze and another second to reach her.

"Aj!" He barked and dropped to his knees beside her. Bucky pulled her cold body into his arms and desperately shook her. "Come on, doll. Come on. Open your eyes." He pleaded desperately and ignored the fact that he couldn't hear the familiar drumming of her heart. "Please—Please, Aimee Jane! Come on!" Bucky cupped her face with his right hand, "Come back to me…"

"What did you do!?" A familiar voice roared, and Bucky instinctively pulled Aj's body closer to himself. When he glanced up, it was Steve who stared down at him in anger, "What the hell did you do!?"

"Stevie—"

"You killed her!" Steve screamed again.

Bucky's eyes snapped back down to Aj's face as he shook his head, his hand tracing her features, "No, no, no. She's not gone. She can't be gone."

"She's gone and it's your fault." A new voice growled. He looked up to see Natasha standing beside Steve. Slowly, more familiar faces began to walk from behind him into view. Tony, Sam, Wanda—they all formed a loud, angry mob as they screamed at him.

"You did this!"

"It's your fucking fault!"

"You killed, Aj!"

The venomous words swirled around him like a thick, heavy cloud of smog. Bucky forced his watery gaze back to the small frame in his arms. Her eyes were blown wide open now, but they were unseeing. Lifeless. The striking blue he had grown so fond of was now dull. His eyes drifted to the now appearing discoloration around her neck. An ugly purple against the pale, smooth skin. A handprint. Bucky shakily dragged his right hand, his flesh and blood, down her face to rest on her collarbones and from there it was easy to see that the handprint had belonged to him. He did this. He had killed her.

Just like the angry mob had screamed.

There was a flash of red.

Then everything was gone.

Bucky blinked a few times, his eyelids heavy, and he focused on the white tiled ceiling above him. The air around him still held a red glow, but it was slowly beginning to fade. Bucky turned his head to the left and saw Wanda leaning against her brother in exhaustion. Tony stood beside her in concern.

Surgery.

He had been in surgery.

Bucky felt a warm hand on his right arm and slowly turned to face in that direction. Blue eyes met his, filled with life and excitement, and he took a second to memorize them again. Aj's face came into focus, she was saying something while Dr. Strange stood behind her, but he couldn't focus on the words. Bucky focused in on the sound of her strong heart. Last time he hadn't remembered anything. Last time had been without dreams.

Why did he have to remember this now?

Aj slid her hand into his right one and gave it a comforting squeeze. It only reminded him of dark bruises on her neck. Maybe it was for the best that he remembered this nightmare. Maybe it was his broken brain's way of warning him one last time.

"No, I told you. I wanna re-read 'The Hobbit' first before I watch the movie."

"God, you're an actual nerd, aren't you?" I audibly gasped at the realization. I had a twizzler half hanging out of my mouth. I bit down on the part I had and used the remainder in my hand to point at him.

Bucky narrowed his eyes, "I was not." He looked to Steve for defense, but the blond just sat with his arms crossed as he avoided his gaze. "I wasn't!"

"Your journals have color coded tabs, your favorite subjects in school were science and math, I've seen the way you look when you're in Tony's lab with me—" I was counting all my examples out on individual fingers as Steve snickered behind me and Bucky fought his growing smirk, "—you read 'The Hobbit' back when it came out in the 40's and wasn't even popular—"

"It came out in 1937." Bucky said dryly. I gave him a pointed look at the perfect example he was giving me right there and he hid his chuckle in a cough.

I pointed back at Steve with my thumb without looking, "Plus, you were friends with this artsy nerd."

"Hey!" Steve complained at being yanked into this. Bucky was full out belly laughing now. He shook his head and motioned toward Bucky, "He was the smartest kid in our entire class, you know?"

"It wasn't a big class, Stevie." Bucky argued.

"Whatever, Buck." Steve scoffed. Anytime they talked about one another they always had this spark of pride in their eyes. It was heartwarming to see how much the two of them cared for one another. It was like hearing a mom preen about her kid's accomplishments. "You were as sharp as a tack." Steve focused his gaze on me to brag. "It's why Buck was such an amazing sniper. Guy could do math in his head on the fly."

I chuckled with a grin, "Well, good news for you boys. Chicks dig nerds now. Especially when the nerds have the muscle mass that y'all do." I reached forward to take a swig from my beer bottle sitting on the coffee table. "So… Rain check on 'The Hobbit' then?"

Bucky nodded and Steve hummed, "You know, I actually don't think I read that when it first came out."

"You didn't." Bucky scoffed. "You were too busy getting beat up in random alleys."

I snorted in laughter and Steve shot me a glare as Bucky just smirked triumphantly. It was movie night or as I liked to call it, 'film education night'. Which was my fancy way of saying that I got to trap two super soldiers in my apartment and force them to watch all my favorite movies. Wanda and Pietro had even joined in tonight. The speedster picked the movie 'Speed' to watch based solely on the name and was disappointed when he found out the only thing speeding in the movie was a runaway bus with Sandra Bullock and Keanu Reeves. They had left about fifteen minutes ago and now we were arguing about what movie to watch next.

"How about 'Raiders of the Lost Ark'?" Steve suggested.

I stood up from my couch to throw away some trash that had accumulated, "You've already seen that one though."

"Bucky hasn't, and I know he'd like it." Steve shrugged.

"Yeah, we'll see about that, punk." Bucky chuckled and I watched as his left shoulder moved up and down from the motion. It had been about a week since Strange operated on him. It had been a little harder to recover from this surgery compared to the first just because it dealt with his nerves. Tony had created an artificial nerve base that connected to his shoulder via Bluetooth. Though every time I called it Bluetooth the genius would scold me and begin lecturing me again on what it really was and how complicated and blah blah blah. The point was, Bucky was able to move and have sensation again. Tony was still working on the arm itself, but that wasn't such a huge issue since Darren still didn't want to add any sort of weight to the shoulder piece for a little while longer. "Aj, Nat is texting you."

I walked back to the living room and picked up my phone to quickly read the message. I scoffed, "She's telling me I need to pack."

"You haven't packed yet?" Steve cried out.

My eyes widened, "Y'all have?"

Bucky nodded his head once as he laughed. Steve just shook his head in disbelief, "Aj, we leave tomorrow at 6 in the morning."

"So?" I shrugged and glanced at my watch, "It's only like 10. I still got plenty of time."

Bucky laughed again, "You're gonna give the punk a heart attack, doll."

"You're too type A, Steve." I grinned at him. "Live in the moment!"

"I am living in the moment and I can do it stress free because I don't have to worry about packing." Steve replied dryly.

I stuck my lower lip out in an over-exaggerated pout, "Bucky, Steve is being mean to me."

"I'm missing an arm, doll." Bucky chuckled, "What do you want me to do?"

I shook my head while clicking my tongue, "Wow. This is what my loyalty pays me." Bucky shot me a dry look and I winked at him and walked back to the kitchen, "I'm making more popcorn for the movie. Y'all want anything?" They chorused a round of negatives and I went about making a fresh bowl. I was humming under my breath as the bag rotated around in the microwave when I felt a looming presence behind me. I grinned and without turning around spoke, "You're way too big to be sneaking up on me, Steve."

He set his hands on either side of me on the counter and lazily rested his heavy head on my shoulder, "You didn't know I was coming until I was right behind you. If I was an enemy it'd be over for you."

"I don't know. You're in the perfect position for an elbow right into the sternum, man."

Rather than responding, Steve dug his chin into the crook of my neck and with a yelp I pulled away from him as he laughed. I turned and shoved him so he stumbled back with a laugh, "You know I'm ticklish, you ass." I glanced at Bucky in the living room. "You're just gonna let your best buddy bully a defenseless dame in the kitchen, Barnes?"

"You're a lot of things, but defenseless ain't one of them, doll." Bucky said with a chuckle. He dragged his eyes up from his phone briefly to meet mine before looking back down again.

The microwave beeped and Steve moved to pull the bag out for me while I grabbed a bowl. He ripped the bag open and began to pour it in. Steve cleared his throat, "I wanted to ask you something."

"Shoot." I replied then shoved a handful of popcorn in my mouth.

"…Tony." Steve said slowly and my smile dimmed to something more solemn. "He hates me, Aj, and honestly it's deserved but… I have no idea how to even begin to fix this. You are fluent in 'Tony Stark' and I was hoping you had some advice."

I finished chewing the popcorn in my mouth, it gave me time to string words together in my head, then I swallowed and nodded, "Why do you think he's angry at you, Steve?"

Steve's eyebrows furrowed and he shrugged, "I lied to him. I lied to him for months."

"Tony isn't mad that you lied to him." I shook my head, and his confusion grew. "Tony's mad because you made him feel like you didn't give a damn about him. He's not even upset that you picked Bucky over him because he gets that. Rhodey is like his Bucky. So, he understands that, but…" I reached out and set a hand on his arm. "Tony loves you, Steve."

Steve nodded, "I know. I—I feel the same way. Tony is family. He's one of the first people I had there for me when I came out of the ice. He's one of the most important people in my life."

I squeezed his arm with a grin, "Then tell him that. It's all he wants to hear, dummy."

"Thanks." Steve chuckled. "That helps."

"Of course. Someone around here has to have the working brain cell." I joked and pushed the bowl into his hands. I gave Bucky a glance as I backpedaled toward my room, "I'm gonna change into my sleep clothes real quick."

While Steve walked back to the couch with my popcorn I went into my room and pushed the door so it was mostly closed. In the bathroom, I undid my ponytail, raking my fingers over my sore scalp from having it up all day, and then wiped away the small amount of make-up I had on my face. Quickly, so I wouldn't waste anymore time, I hurried back out into my room and dug around for my yellow 'Hammer Time' sweater.

I had the sweater half over my head when I heard Steve's hushed voice, "I'm being serious here, Buck. I need to know now. Just shoot me straight." There was a brief pause. "Do you have feelings for Aj?"

My entire body went rigid in shock. Blood stopped pumping, lungs stopped moving air, heart stopped beating. Everything just came to a complete standstill. There was a good chance time itself had frozen. I forced myself to keep moving though in fear that the lack of sound I was making would tip them off. A stronger, smarter person might hurry back out there to cut the conversation short, but I was neither strong nor smart so here we are.

"No. I already told you. No, I do not have any sort of feelings for Aj beyond friendship." Bucky replied firmly. Almost in an annoyed, hurried tone. "Look what we've been through together. That made us close, but that's it."

"Buck, come on—"

"She's not my type, Stevie. Now can you tell me what this damn movie is actually about?"

The conversation shifted so quickly, but I was still stuck. I wasn't Bucky's type. That made complete sense to me. Of course, I wasn't his type. I was loud and brash, annoying too, and my most commonly worn accessory was a pair of bruised and bloodied knuckles. In a desperate attempt to throw this train of thought off the tracks, my lump of a brain threw a memory into the forefront of my mind. Talking to Bucky over the phone about if we'd be friends in the 40's. He had said he'd flirt with me, but then again wasn't he known for flirting with everyone back in that time?

I quickly rubbed at my face and tried to ignore the weird gnawing dread I felt in the pit of my stomach. Why did I even care? What did it matter that I wasn't Bucky's type? I forced a smile to my face and stepped out of my bedroom then hurried back to my seat between the two of them. Bucky made a comment that Steve laughed at and despite not even registering it I added a chuckle of my own. Steve started the movie and I sunk in my seat.

Why had that topic even come up between them? Was I somehow sending him mixed signals of some kind? Bucky had stopped touching me as much, which I had just shrugged off, but maybe that was why. Maybe I was touching him too much and he thought it was because I had feelings for him. That wasn't the case though, I didn't have feelings for Bucky. I didn't have feelings for Bucky, right? I didn't have feelings for anything. Hell, I barely have feelings period. Emotions are an enigma to me. Jesus, it felt like my brain was slowly crumbling into a burning madness. This is why I never even started thinking on anything in that category. All it did was give me a headache.

In fact, it gave me such a bad headache that an hour after the movie had ended and the soldiers had left, I immediately went to the closest training room. It was the smaller one on the residential side of the building that was mainly just used for weightlifting and cardio. There was a bag in the corner for anyone without super strength and that's where I was.

1 AM with bloody knuckles.

The others were going to be pissed when they realized I had worked on a bag without tape or gloves, but I needed the sharp sting against my skin. That's what distracted me. That's what kept my head empty and clear. I just needed the time to properly store and bury my most recent findings in the archives of my mind.

A sharp whistle startled me, and I reached out to catch the swinging bag while turning around. Natasha stood in the doorway glaring at me and I grimaced. I had been hoping to at least make it half the day without getting lectured for this.

"What are you doing?" Natasha pressed and walked over with a rag she grabbed from the shelf.

"Working out." I replied and held my hands out so she could wipe away the leaking blood. It really wasn't even that bad. They'd look a mess when it bruised over, but right now they were just an angry red.

Natasha shook her head, "It's one in the morning. We're leaving for Stark's island in five hours. I'll ask again, what are you doing?"

"I can sleep on the plane." I shrugged and pulled my hands away from her. "I have a—a broken record in my head. Can't wind down right now."

"So, you decided to bust up your knuckles instead?"

"Yeah, essentially."

Natasha shot me a glare and I gave her a sheepish smile in return. She shook her head, "What the hell is bothering you bad enough to come down here?"

"What isn't?" I replied with a scoff and it wasn't even a lie. Sleeping a full night had been difficult since I was gut shot. My mind was constantly thinking of Aubrey these days since I knew HYRDA was after her too. For some reason, Sharon's conversation from ages ago still lingered in my head too. This had been building up. Bucky had just been the last thing to push me over for some Godforsaken reason. "I'm fine, Nat."

"I didn't even ask if you were okay yet."

"Wanda's mind reading thing is rubbing off on me I guess." I mumbled and tried to walk past her. Natasha caught me by my bicep softly and gave me the trademark look. Clint and Tony had warned me about the look. I had seen it done on them a hundred times and laughed in the background but seeing it myself was a whole other thing. It was mix between concern, skepticism, and a sprinkle of 'if you don't tell me what's in your head I'm going to punch you in the throat'. I sighed, "I'm worried about my dead-beat sister and I'm worried about this Rumlow guy and I'm worried that Sharon is gonna kill me in the middle of the night for being a sleeper agent and Bucky was talking relationship shit—"

Natasha blinked in surprise then smirked, "You and Bucky?"

"Wow." I said slowly. "That entire speech and all you heard was Bucky? Did you miss the 'murdered for being a sleeper agent' part?"

"You're not a sleeper agent and Sharon isn't going to kill you." Natasha said offhandedly like it was the most natural thing in the world to say. She quickly moved back onto the topic she wanted to discuss, "So, you and Bucky? Are you thinking about dating?"

I shook my head, "What? No! That's not in the cards for me and you can go ahead and shoot that horse in the face because I'm not Bucky's type."

Without hesitation, Natasha made the quick movements to flip me, but I had noticed in the nick of time and was able to drop my arm and rotate out of her reach effectively preventing her from throwing me. Natasha straightened her posture, "Huh. First things first, very nice block. I'm proud. Secondly, the punishment for self-trash talk—"

"That wasn't a 'me' thought, it was a Bucky thought." I said quickly. "I can't be punished for echoing what someone else thinks about me. Otherwise, I'd never stop being flipped onto my ass."

Natasha narrowed her eyes at me, "Bucky told you that you weren't his type?"

"He said it to Steve. I may or may not have been eavesdropping." I crossed my arms, "Which is something you can't get onto me about because your boyfriend eavesdrops all the damn time."

She shook her head and brought the focus back, "Well?"

"Well, what?"

"Aj, how do you feel about that?"

Bucky was a stand-up guy. Even with his murky past and traumas he'd be the kind of guy any girl would be lucky to snag. He was handsome, smart, charming, funny, the list went on and on, but above all else Bucky had the ability to make someone feel completely and totally safe. I mean, most of the Avengers were good at that, but with Bucky it was different. It was more than just mentally being aware that I was safe with him. It was almost a spiritual thing. Like my soul knew nothing wrong could happen if I had him in my sights.

He deserved someone who made him feel the same way. It made sense that I wasn't his type because I was a wrecking ball. I was a hurricane of snark and rude comments. I was a chaotic being that reveled in violence. A person who needed the physical pain of hitting something in order to think straight. I was a mess, a train wreck, a headcase, a—

"You're thinking really hateful things about yourself again, aren't you?" Natasha broke my thought process. She looked concerned again, but she shouldn't be. This was nothing. After I showered and put some medicine on my knuckles the entire thing would be successfully stored in the 'do not open' closet at the back of my head never to be seen again.

I smirked and lightly tapped her shoulder with my fist, "Me? Never."