Day 35:

Noctis left.

"To seek his heritage," Father had said.

She watched them drive away from atop the Citadel steps. It was an unfamiliar sight. She had been in that car last time, while Father alone had stood on these stairs. But this was a new life. Or the old one she had never quite lived. She still couldn't distinguish the two.

It would take several days to drive across Lucis and accumulate the royal arms on the mainland, though less than before in the absence of imperial blockades and with the benefit of Father's directions. Several days she would be separated from both Noctis and Ignis. It should have meant little in comparison to years, but the time seemed to stretch on indefinitely.

She borrowed Noct's clothes while he wasn't there to complain. She thought to steal Cor's but he was twice as big as Noctis and four times as big as she was. Instead she borrowed some Crownsguard fatigues from their supply.

Iris made a valiant attempt to take Reina shopping for new clothes. That lasted little more than ten minutes into the first store, as Reina stood, arms crossed, and beheld the store patrons coming and going, clutching bags and screaming children.

"Hey." Iris nudged her. "You still with me?"

"Yes."

"Good. Then stop worrying about whatever you're worrying about. We're gonna fix that, okay?"

"They're not thoughts you can fix."

"Try me," Iris said.

"These people are fat on life. Of course they work for their money, but it's worthless work, just like the gil they spend and the pleasures they buy. They don't know what goes into making this perfect bubble of peace they inhabit and they don't care. So long as they're always well fed, always entertained, always in the company of rich and attractive people."

"They're just people, Rei…" Iris said.

"And people are stupid, greedy, parasites."

"You're a person too, you know."

"And the only thing I care about is myself and preserving my own bubble of peace," Reina said. Such as her peace was.

"That's not true. You're trying to protect everyone."

"No. I'm trying to protect the people I care about. Why? Because I care about you. And I would be lost without all of you. I know. I've been through that already."

"But you're protecting Lucis also. You didn't just pull us out of the fire, you saved Insomnia and everyone in it. You're still holding back the daemons all across Lucis and keeping people safe from the Starscourge. That isn't selfish," Iris said.

"No? You believe that because you don't know my motivations. I saved Insomnia because it's mine. My home. My castle. My city, where everyone I love lives. I protect the people for Father, not for them. I couldn't care less if they died, but Father does. And in protecting you all, I also seek to protect your happiness."

After that, they had returned to the Citadel. It was for the best. Sometimes she wondered if this world she had woken up in was really the one she had fought so hard to save for ten years.

But it wasn't saved, even still. It wasn't right, for all she tried to make it perfect. She couldn't rule. She couldn't wield spectral glaives and cut back the dark. But perhaps there was something she could do yet.

"I want to try something, Father."

"Yes?" He always made a point of putting aside anything he was working on and giving her his full attention whenever she was aware enough to ask for it. Guilt ate at him, but she had no solution for that except lies.

"You aren't going to like it."

"You are making a poor argument."

She smiled in spite of herself. And once she had, she smiled wider still. He was alive. She was alive. Noct was still sentenced to death, but they had time. And knowledge. They could make an attempt. And an attempt was what this was.

Father was still waiting, hands folded and smiling gently up at her from his chair.

"Tell me, my dear," he said.

She did. And when she had, he sat silently pensive, staring past her rather than at her.

"You are right," he said. "I do not like it much. Nevertheless I do see the benefit."

She waited.

At length he sighed. "Answer me one question, my dear: in your estimate, is it likely that we will come into direct conflict with the Astrals in the near future?"

A question she had given much thought to, but still never come to a satisfactory conclusion on.

"I think so," she said. "I don't know how we could avoid it."

He nodded grimly. "Very well. We will attempt this plan of yours. But you are not to over tax yourself, do you understand?"

"Yes, Father."

"You are lying to me, Reina."

Why deny what they both knew was true? She lied so automatically she hadn't even considered what an honest response would have been.

He sighed. "You must stop this, Reina. I cannot begin to imagine what world you lived in where this is what you became, but this is not that world."

She said nothing.

He ran his hand over his face, sighed again. "Go and gather Clarus and Cor. We will do this thing now, if you are prepared."