AN: Mwahaha. I believe my last chapter was the first ever cliff hanger on this story, and it's advancing the plot. :D A reward for my being busy? And I just wanted to. Have any of you read The Diego Diaries? It's IronhidexRatchet centric, but there's also PrimexProwl, JazzxMirage, The TwinsxBluestreak, and some others. So far I love it, and am on part two. I totally suggest it!

LionLover190: Happy you like it! ;D
Noella50881: You never knooow
Autobot Firekat: Thanks for the review.
Rockubyebaby: Oh yeaaah!
Wind of the Dawn: They trust the Cybertronians. Apparently that's a mistake when it comes to pink liquids!
Writergurl616: Yeah, some people can come up with some freaky shit.
Fk306 animelover: Haha, if you paid careful attention it says it wasn't Sarah. Epps was just being mean. :D
Bumblebee girl: I'm happy you like it so much! :) Thanks for reading and reviewing!
TransformerJunkie: Thanks a lot, hun! ;D
The Result of Squffie: Haha, yay FANFICTION!

Reviews: italics/underlined actual members. italics only are anonymous reviewers.
Comm frequencies between Cybertronians: :italics:

Edit: Originally had Miles' mom's name as Margaret. Only after realizing that Sam would shorten it to Maggie and that there is already a Maggie do I change it.

Chapter 23
Rolling Pin Horrors

They sat through test after test after test, Ratchet working hard to make sure they were alright. Epps was tested right along with Sam and Miles, despite the fact he hadn't drank as much. Ratchet was nothing but thorough, and even resorted to doing some tests over and over again. The three sat quietly and took it for a few hours, slightly worried themselves over the reaction to their current predicament, but the longer it took the more annoyed the two teens seemed to get.

Most of the others who had tried the energon had spit it back out, or barely even managed a swallow. That was also when Sunstreaker, Sideswipe, and Wheeljack had been watching. They knew that more then one cup would be bad for a human, and even a full cup would probably be bad, though they watched with amusement as Will chugged one down, baffled by the human who suddenly found the energon nice instead of nasty.

Either way Ratchet had made sure to have Glen get everyone who had swallowed it together. It appeared soon enough that anyone it didn't agree with just threw up, getting it out of their systems soon after consuming it. There was only about five people who had done so, each of them having consumed about half a glass through sheer will power alone. An eye would be kept on all of them, but for now they were not the most pressing matter. Miles, Epps, Sam, and even Will were. Though Will, who had already emptied his stomach, was second priority to the others.

On Miles part he had been up all night, and had already accepted the fact that freaky alien shit will happen to him when he had the 'add ons' from Ratchet. He had been up all night the night before after being kidnapped by Epps to read fan fiction, and he was being kept awake a second night. So by the time six hours had passed and it was around two in the morning, he was more then cranky and was tending towards snapping at the medic when ever he was asked about his condition.

Sam was fine, if not slightly tired. He hadn't spent the night before awake and facing the horrors of NEST fan fiction, and had woken up at the same time as most of the other organics on base. Epps, having gone without the same amount of sleep as Miles, was actually more surprising in that he just sat and watched tiredly, remaining relatively quiet. Sam had assumed that the older male would get snappish like Miles, but assume makes an ass out of you and me, after all.

Ratchet and the three humans weren't the only ones in the medbay. Bumblebee and Barricade sat side by side, using data pads to play some game together. Optimus Prime stood by Prowl, talking softly to his SIC. Jazz was holding Epps. Will and Ironhide were there too, but the older man was off the hook because he had already cleaned his systems of the energon. Will was asleep.

Currently the two were both watching as Miles and Ratchet fought, the teen wanting sleep, and the Medic saying it might not be the best idea. Going to sleep would disturb his scans, and might make it impossible for him to help in time. Of course, that had been at the beginning over their little row, when both were still being slightly reasonable. Now they were just throwing stuff back and forth, Ratchet threatening to throw stuff and turn Miles into a toaster, and Miles finding a lot of ways to call the Medic older then the Pit itself.

Sam sighed, glancing over at Bumblebee and gesturing the 'bot closer. When he was close enough he whispered in the 'bots audio, and grinned as he watched Bumblebee's optics dimmed, a sign that they were searching the internet. The blue optics brightened once more and looked down at Sam with amusement.

Sam got Epps attention, as the older man had been nodding off, and everyone in the room turned to watch as Ratchet froze completely, hands in mid air, about to execute a threatening gesture. Miles watched astonished, before looking at Sam with wide eyes.

"You didn't." He whispered in disbelief.

Sam smirked, "I did."

The three humans jumped when they heard a loud crash, and looked to see Prowl sprawled out on the floor. As one the three humans turned to stare at Bumblebee, the Autobot practically glowing with glee and hidden mischievousness.

"I sent him the one chapter just focused on him and Ratchet. And then when he didn't crash after reading that and just sent me an angry comm I sent him the one with him and 'Cade." Bumblebee explained, sounding somewhat proud.

Barricade raised an optic ridge, glaring at Bumblebee. "Excuse me?"

"The one where they keep Miles as a sex socket?" Epps asked, snickering slightly. Miles glared moodily at the older man.

Bumblebee nodded enthusiastically, and Miles turned his glare on him. Barricade growled. "Send me whatever you're talking about, insect."

"Yes sir!" Bumblebee mocked, and Sam and Epps paid attention to their optics once more. Bumblebee's dimmed, and then Barricade's dimmed. Bumblebee's brightened, and Barricade's stayed dim for awhile more until they brightened once more and he stared at Miles.

"Can you really bend your body like that?" The Decepticon Neutral asked, causing Epps and Sam to burst out laughing. Miles huffed, and started to climb off of the med-berth, intent on leaving, when Optimus grabbed him up, holding him in one hand.

"Bend like what?" Optimus asked, out of the loop completely. Bumblebee's optics dimmed once more as he sent the fan fiction to his leader, then one with the Prime, Miles, and Sam, then one with Prime 'taking care of' all his soldiers, organic and Cybertronian alike. "Oh, Primus."

Miles looked at him with a sympathetic gaze, "I know, Big Guy. And it's not gonna go away any time soon with this lot."

Jazz was laughing, setting Epps down to the spot where Miles had been previously, and picking up Prowl, setting him on a separate berth. He poked Ratchet, but didn't get a response. The Medic's optics were still dimmed, indicating he was at least on the internet.

"Ya know, Ah love how inventive ya humans ar'." Jazz said, amusement completely evident. "No' only 'ave ya taken ou' the Hatchet, bu' ya scarred poor Optimus, William, an' Prowler. Ah ain't sure if Prowler will ever be able ta look at Miles again."

"I'm thinking of creating my own account. Personally, I'm a fan of 'Cade, Mi-" Epps ducked as Miles tossed his shoe at him, laughing. "les, and Prowl. Though my OTP would have to be Will and 'Hide."

Ironhide smirked, "I think it's hilarious. I didn't know the Captain could blush."

Epps, Sam, and even Miles laughed. They were stopped short when they heard a loud grinding sound, and then saw as Ratchet came back.

"Primus," Ratchet cursed, sounding oddly strained. "That's it, all of you organics are leaving. I don't care anymore."

"They will be fine then?" Optimus asked, shifting Miles a bit so he could hold the teen on his shoulder. Miles looked around, enjoying the height.

"To put it simply," Ratchet replied. "I don't know. I don't know how they can take it, or why they can. I think it has something to do with the Allspark."

Even Barricade made an incredulous noise, all of the 'bots thinking Ratchet might have finally slipped up and cracked.

Ratchet glared, "There's a slight contingency of Allspark energy residing in all of them. Scan them. Sam and Epps have a just a bit more, which I am going to presume is because they both held the Allspark when it was doing something. Sam has more then Epps, having used it to kill Megatron. Epps has more then Miles, having used it to revive Jazz. I have no clue why Miles has any at all, or Will for that matter, but he has more then Will."

Miles guffawed, "So why could I drink more then Epps?"

"Nanobots. They're Cybertronian technology, something the Allspark energy, however small, can latch on to and understand. I think it's helping you along and progressing you to the point that Sam is at." Ratchet explained, moving over to Prowl and beginning to revive the SIC. "Perhaps even because you're still growing, and Epps is older. I honestly have no idea."

Optimus looked at Bumblebee, "You were able to commune with the Allspark. What do you think?"

Bumblebee shrugged, an entirely human gesture, as he shifted uneasily on his peds. "I am unsure, sir. To a certain extent I can sense the Allspark, but not in them. Perhaps because it is just energy, but I had no clue until Ratchet said someth-" He was interrupted by Barricade comming all of them on a private channel so that Autobots outside the room wouldn't hear.

:I suggest we discuss this over comm.: Barricade.

Prime nodded. :Bumblebee, continue.:

:I had no idea Allspark energy resided in them until Ratchet told us to scan them. I am sensitive to the Allspark, as you all know, but I can not sense anything with them. However, the Allspark shard seems to disperse energy more then the Allspark cube ever did. Trailbreaker mentioned handing it to Miles during the fight, and hours later Miles gave it to Epps. Perhaps it leaked through the container and affected Miles, I do not know. I believe Will held the cube at one point for a very short amount, and was around when Epps used the shard on Jazz. Perhaps we should see if Fig has any energy as well.: Bumblebee.

:It doesn't seem ta be havin' any negative effects on 'em.: Jazz.

:Ratchet, what do you think?: Prime.

For a moment there was nothing, the others turning to watch Ratchet until he finally stopped working on Prowl. :It does not seem to be harming them. In fact, it saved them. That much energon should have and would have killed a normal organic. They're alive.:

:That is good then. Any suggestions on what we should do concerning this? There appears to be no cause for worry.: Prime.

:There is a human expressions Will likes to use. Go with the flow. Though he says he mainly uses it in battle, I believe it could be used here as well.: Ironhide.

Prime vented softly, the human equivalent of a sigh. :I suppose that is all we can d-: He stopped short as he felt something hit his helm, coming back to his surroundings in time to see a shoe fall back to the ground. There was silence for a moment before they all looked at Miles, still in the palm of Optimus' hand.

Miles snickered, then pointed at Sam. "Not me this time." They all turned to look at Sam.

"Since this is concerning us I believe we have the right to hear whatever you guys are saying." Sam huffed, glaring at all of them. His hands were placed firmly on his hips, and both Miles and Bumblebee couldn't help but think he was channeling Judy Witwicky. "Also, I don't give a frag what you say, I'm going home after this. So is Miles."

"Damn," Miles whistled. "Were you just channeling Judy or somethin'? That was uncanny."

Optimus shifted, setting Miles back down next to Sam. "We are sorry for doing that. As for now you will be allowed to return home, as long as Bumblebee may scan you every day." He paused as he watched Miles look at Sam, then all of them, then back at Sam. "What is it, Miles?"

"I want to tell my parents about you. The whole thing with NEST." Miles replied, causing Epps to perk up.

"Ohh, ohh, I wanna come!" Epps exclaimed cheerfully, causing Miles to give him an incredulous look.

Sam grinned, "I think it would be good if you came, Epps. Also, Bumblebee, Barricade, and Prowl. My guardian and his two guardians."

"I am not his guardian." Barricade narrowed his optics.

"Unofficial guardian. What the frag ever, that counts." Sam just waved him off.

Optimus nodded, "I shall come too. It sounds like a good idea."

Sam smirked, and Miles looked at him wearily. Ratchet kicked them all out of his medbay. The medic would spend the next few days without recharge, dutifully making sure that his organic comrades wouldn't be harmed by the energon if he could help it. He would be relieved to find that only Will, Sam, Epps, and Miles had drank more then the reccomeneded organic amount of Energon. Even more relieved that only Will had reacted badly, and that it had been taken care of by purging his systems.

After that he would try his hardest to predict what the Allspark energy would do.

They had decided to take his parents to the Look Out, that way the Autobots and Decepticon Neutral could transform to prove their point. Optimus was waiting there to meet them, and Miles brought Epps in his non-sentient car, Sasha. Barricade and Prowl parked somewhere nearby but in separate places in the neighborhood, putting their holoforms inside of Bumblebee so as not to make it look suspicious. Two cop cars at one house could potentially ruin the Lancaster name on accident, something they didn't want.

Bumblebee got there first, and Sam practically dragged Barricade and Prowl out. He talked to Barricade in a low voice, smirking when the 'con nodded. Bumblebee activated his holoform, and watched as Barricade and Sam walked to the front door, Prowl standing in between them with a bewildered expression on his face. Sam knocked, and the door opened to reveal Elizabeth Lancaster.

Sam smiled at her, "Hey Lizzie, it's good to see you again!"

"What have I told you about just calling me mom or grandma, Sammie?" Elizabeth grinned, reaching out and ruffling Sam's hair. "Who are these fine young men with you?"

"I am Barry, you might have heard Miles talk about me." Barricade smirked. "Officer Barry he might have referred to me as. This is my partner, Perry, but he prefers to go by Prowl." He wrapped an arm around Prowl, glancing to Sam to see a shit eating grin on his face. "We're Miles' boyfriend."

In the blink of an eye Barricade and Prowl were gone from the front porch and dragged inside by Elizabeth. Sam smirked as he heard the 'con cussing him out, and walked over to Bumblebee, leaning against his alt form.

Bumblebee raised an eyebrow at him, "Do I want to know?"

"I'm just putting the fear of a mother in them. Maggie can be worse then my mom sometimes." Sam replied innocently, grinning when Bumblebee started to laugh. "I told 'Cade that he'd be getting Miles back for Mason if he told his mom that. The poor fragger believed me."

"You're evil. I'm extremely happy I have you as my Charge." Bumblebee grinned.

The two watched as Miles pulled up, and they watched as Epps and the teen got out of the car. They talked for a bit, Sam purposefully distracting them, and Bumblebee helping. He enjoyed it when his charge was mischievous. He was grinning as he listened in to the humans, but it faded when Prowl commed him.

"Samual, what is a rolling pin? Prowl seems terrified by it at the moment." Bumblebee asked, sounding confused. He didn't bother looking it up on the internet.

Miles, horrified, looked at Sam accusingly. "What the frag did you do?"

"Had 'Cade say that he and Prowl were your lovers." Sam smirked, watching as Epps started to laugh.

"Sam!" Miles ran into the house, the two humans and one Autobot holoform following after him quickly. "MOM PUT DOWN THE ROLLING PIN!" He yelled as he turned the corner to the kitchen.

Elizabeth blinked at her son, smiling innocently. She knew she was caught, having had Prowl and Barricade sit directly next to each other, and had taken out a rolling pin and began to threaten them both with it, looming over them menacingly despite the fact she was smaller then the both of them. Prowl and Barricade were looking at her with wide eyes, having moved even closer together. Neither wanted to admit to being scared by an organic, but awhile ago Bumblebee had managed to talk the both of them into adding on human pain receptors, so they could feel more like their organic friends. They regretted this as they stared at the rolling pen.

"Baby, I was just warning them not to hurt you." She said calmly.

"Mom, Barrica- Barry, was joking. The government thing? They're part of it. I've been given permission to explain it to you and d-" Miles was surprised when his own mother cut him off.

Lizzie waved her hand at him dismissively, putting the rolling pin down on the table. "Yes, yes, I already know. They're actually giant aliens. Prowl is the Second in Command of the Autobots, the blonde one is Bumblebee, another Autobot that doubles as Sam's car, and then Barricade is a Decepticon Neutral."

Miles, Epps, Sam, and the Cybertronians stared at her with gob smacked expressions.

"Us mothers have to stick together. Judy is rather helpful when I need to find something out and it concerns Samual too." Lizzie explained, smirking.

"How long have you known?" Miles asked, still staring at her with a shocked expression. Bumblebee sent an accusing look at Sam, and Sam shrugged, mouthing 'you have a problem, take it up with my mom.' to the Autobot scout.

"Since I found out it involved Samual. So for awhile now." Lizzie moved closer to her son, wrapping him up in a hug.

Barricade growled, "So you still threatened us?" He glared at Lizzie, but quickly backed down when Lizzie glared back.

"If my baby ever gets hurt because of you aliens then all of you will suffer." Lizzie glared. "You sleep at some point. And your interiors can catch fire. I imagine those windows of yours can be broken as well." She glanced at Prowl. "I suggest telling that to your leader, too."

Sam snickered, "Miles, I officially love your mom. Not even mine threatened them that much."

Lizzie pulled Sam into the hug, grinning. "Thank you, Sammie. Me and Judy have been talking and think it would be best if us, Ron, and Bob come and visit this NEST base."

"You guys are doomed. Two mothers and two husbands who know better than to stand in their way from the sounds of it." Epps said, smirking at Barricade and Prowl.

Prowl, Bumblebee, and Barricade slowly nodded.