Happy New Year! Sorry I haven't updated. I've been sick with the flu (not fun). Anyway, here another chapter. No Merrick in this chapter (I know I said he'd be in it but I'm starting the Victory Tour next chapter). Anyways, enjoy!

Chapter 15

I did it. I won the 74th Annual Hunger Games. There is only one problem. Peeta Mellark won as well. It's not a problem on my end; it's a problem on the Capitol's end. There was never supposed to be two Victors during a single Hunger Game. They even made sure of it when they revoked the rule change when it was only the two of us left. As soon as I pulled out the nightlock I had hidden away, I ensure both of our survival, because two Victors are better than none.

During our final Interview, I claimed that I did it because of my enduring love for Peeta, something Haymitch told me to say on the roof. He really drove home the importance that it didn't do it to rebel. I seemed to have tricked everyone. That is, everyone but President Snow. Before I left the Capitol, I had a private meeting with him. He told me he wasn't fully convinced of my love for Peeta and that he wasn't quite sure if everyone in the outlying Districts believed my love story. If they didn't, I knew I'd be in trouble.

I'm not sure why he only spoke to me, why Peeta wasn't there with me. Maybe he believed Peeta, and thought that he really loved me. It isn't fair. It's not my fault is a better actor than I am. When were got back to District 12, I told Peeta what the President had said to me. I then asked him if he really had feelings for me. I had to make sure. He assured me that he didn't, which I was thankful for. I then started to worry about pulling off this relationship. I didn't know if I could do it now that we weren't facing other tributes or the Gamemakers. He comforted me and told me that we'd work on it. I couldn't have asked for a better district partner.

I hear a voice in the distance calling me name, getting closer and closer. I suddenly snap out of it and realize I am in my room with Gale holding onto me for dear life. I've never seen the fear I see in his eyes now.

"Katniss. You were having a bad dream."

"Gale, what are you doing here?" I ask still disoriented. "Shouldn't you be at work?"

"Relax, Katniss, it's Sunday." he says.

"You should be with your family." I reply. I know he doesn't get to see them a lot now that he works in the mines six days a week.

"I am. I mean you are practically part of my family." he says.

"Gale why are you here?" I ask. Our houses aren't exactly close by.

"You're mother told me about your nightmares, how you scream and thrash around. She didn't know how to help you." he said softly.

"And she thinks you can?" I ask. I don't think anyone can keep the nightmares away. They come to me whenever I close my eyes, regardless of the time of day. I can't forget about what happened in the Arena.

"I can at least try to get you out of them. She said you almost took her out you were failing around so much."

"I'm sorry." I say apologetically. The last thing I need is people to worry about me.

"What was the dream about, the one you just had?" he asks.

"Snow found out about Peeta and mine's relationship…that it wasn't real. He tried to hurt Prim." He's the only person besides Peeta and Haymitch that knows about the relationship being a fraud. We talked about it shortly after I returned.

"It's stupid. They never should have made you go along with that plan." Gale says with venom in his voice. "Didn't they even think about what could have happened?"

"Gale…"

"No really, Katniss. How long are you supposed to even keep up this façade?"

"It's only until the end of the Victory Tour. We plan on breaking up after that." I tell Gale. This seems to relax him. He lies down on my bed and I lay beside him. He then wraps me in his arms, bringing me closer to him. It's weird. I've never had Gale show me this type of affection before. I guess that what happens when you almost lose your best friend. You don't waste any more moments where you let them know that you care.

"Every Sunday, I wait for you at our place hoping that you will show up." he says as his lips mutter the words against my forehead. "I think it might be good for you, to go out there, to clear your head. Just like we used to do."

"Gale, I'm sorry that I checked out for a while. It's just so hard to even get out of bed some days." I murmur softly.

"I think I can help you. I want to help you get back to the way things were." he says brushing my hair. I close my eyes and savor his touch. It's been so long since anyone has really touched me. It's my own fault. I've kept everyone away. As I lay there, I think about what he said. I don't think things can ever truly go back to the way they were but I don't tell him that. Instead, I just lie there and hope to regain some sort of normalcy.

The next few months go by quickly. I go hunting with Gale every Sunday, something I am thankful he pushed me to do. It really does make me forget about my problems and I start to feel like myself a little more. I still can't be entirely free though. There is still the fact that I'm supposed to be madly in love with Peeta. I've started hanging out with him again, holding hands while we walk through town or stealing kisses from each other at restaurants. It's not something we do because either of us wants it. We do it in case the Peacekeeper are watching us and reporting back to the Capitol (it really wouldn't surprise me if they were). We go over to each other's houses and spend the night sometimes, to keep up the act.

That's where I'm heading now, to his house right next door to mine, carrying a pot of stew my mother helped me make. I let myself in and find him in the kitchen, removing a tray of bread from the oven. We greet each other and eat our meal, talking about the Victory Tour, which is only a week away. We talk about what we think it will be like and what is expected of us.

After cleaning up the kitchen, we head upstairs to his room and climb into bed. It's a little weird to share a bed with someone that you just consider a friend, but we've decided it might help us to act more like a couple. It will help us to become more comfortable with each other's touch and the feeling of our bodies against one another's. We embrace each other as we lay there on our sides, beneath the covers. I hear a low choking sound from the back of his throat.

"Peeta, what's wrong?" I ask pulling myself further up the bed so that our eyes are level.

"My mother." he whispers. Whatever it is that happened, I know it can't be good. I've seen the way she treats him. It's enough to make me sick. How could a mother ever treat her own child like that?

"What happened?" I ask, sweeping my thumb across his cheek, which is dampened with his tears.

"I messed up today…I dropped a cake I had just finished. I lost my footing and I fell to the ground."

"Did she hurt you?" I ask with concern. It wouldn't be the first time she had beaten him. I've seen him come to school with black eyes and bruises before.

"She threw me out Katniss. She told me to never come back." he says as more tears escape his eyes.

"It'll be fine. You'll be fine. You don't need her." I say trying to soothe him. It's not true though. Every person needs his or her mother, no matter how horrible of a person she may be. It's human nature to want your mother. "Peeta I'm sure she didn't mean it. She was just upset." I end up telling him, hoping this will make him feel better. He pulls me closer to him, hugging me tightly. He grip relaxes after about a minute and I rest my head on his chest.

"Peeta, what do you want…after all of this is over?" I ask him. I'm not sure where this question came from even though I brought it up.

"I want things to be normal. I don't want people pointing me out on the streets as the boy who won The Hunger Games. I want to find a girl to love and one that loves me." He then pauses for a while before letting out a sigh. "Katniss, do you think I'll find someone?"

"Yes. Lots of girls liked you in school Peeta. I heard them talk about you during lunch and in the bathroom."

"Even now…with my leg?" he asks, his voice a little shaky.

"You will find someone Peeta." I tell him as I hover above him, looking into his eyes. "You're too good a person to not find someone."

"What about you, Katniss? What do you want?" he asks me. I plop down besides him, quite dramatically, as I exhale loudly. I should have known he'd return the question.

"It doesn't matter what I want. It'll never happen." I say in defeat.

"You don't know that."

"It can't, not unless things change. Not unless Panem changes." I tell him. I see him raise his brow with intrigue. I figure that now is as good a time as any to tell him about Merrick. "There is a boy. I boy I want to be with but he lives far away in District 2."

"How did you meet him if he lives all the way out there?" Peeta asks with confusion.

"His father is a Peacekeeper. He comes to District 12 sometimes to train the Peacekeepers. The boy, Merrick, he would come here too and live in Peacekeeper's Village. He helped me one day when I was 11 and we've been friends ever since. Last summer, he kissed me and we told each other how we really felt. He came back here, for the Reaping. He talked to me in the Justice Building. He told me he'd be waiting for me when I come to District 2 on the Victory Tour." I say, spilling out everything to Peeta.

"That's good." Peeta says encouragingly.

"I'm worried…about what he saw in the Games. What if he thinks that we're together?"

"Maybe he will have seen through it. Gale did after all." In this moment, I choose to hold on to the hope that Merrick knows me well enough to know where my heart really lies. He's always had my heart.

"Let's get some sleep." Peeta suggests. I curl up next to him and close my eyes, falling gently into a deep sleep.

It is the last Sunday I to hunt with Gale before leaving for the Victory Tour. I don't waste any time getting ready and make my way to our meeting spot. He is already there waiting for me which is odd. I'm always the first one there. I meet him and unpack the meal I brought for us. I'm thankful that he doesn't give me any snide remarks. Instead, he just smiles and takes a bite of a roll. Once breakfast is over, Gale stands and starts towards the forest. He must want to cover a lot of ground since I won't be there for the next two Sundays. Since I know he won't take my money, I know this is the only way I can help him out. I need today to be successful. Gale checks the snare line while I search for any sign on life. I manage to see a rabbit scurrying around. It's a hard target since its fur matches the freshly fallen snow. I still manage to shoot it, right in the eye. I collect my prize and attach it to my belt before I continue. An hour later, my eye catches sight of a deer walking along a small valley of the forest floor. I hear Gale quietly approaching. I only hope he won't do anything to scare it away. He's done it before. Instead he lowers his mouth to my ear.

"Do you think you can get it?" he asks. I turn towards him.

"I don't know."

"We'll do it together. Ready your bow." he tells me. We both prepare ourselves. Gale quietly counts to three and we release our bows. Both manage to pierce the deer's skin but it doesn't give up without a fight. It runs opposite of us and we both book off in a sprint, pausing only to get another shot. It eventually collapses and we catch it. We remove the arrows and then Gale uses his knife to butcher the animal. It's a shame we can't take the whole deer but it would be way too heavy to carry. I hate wasting anything but it's just the way it has to be.

We then make our way back to the fence. We hide our hunting gear and I hand over everything I shot to Gale since my family no longer needs to worry about food. I begin to walk back towards the fence.

"Catnip, wait up." I hear Gale call. I forgot his bag weights a lot more than mine, causing him to move a little slower. I stop and wait for him at the edge of the woods, leaning against a nearby tree. He emerges and drops his bag on the ground. He has a look of intent on his face, although I'm not sure what he plans of saying or doing next. He advances towards me and in one fluid movement, he takes my face in his hands and kisses my lips. I'm not sure what I should do. I put my palms on his chest, thinking about pushing him away but I know that would only hurt him. My only resolve is to stand there and let him kiss me. He ends it after a matter of seconds and gazes down at me.

"I had to do that…at least once." he says as he caresses my cheek. He doesn't wait for me to reply or react. Instead, he retrieves his bag and walks toward the fence without me. I sink down to the base of the tree and think about the kiss. Things started to make a lot more sense now. It explains his jealousy towards Merrick, why he ripped him off of me when he saw us kissing in the meadow. No wonder he was upset when I hugged him that day in the forest and confessed that I missed Merrick. He must have thought that hug was for him. It's also the reason he never wanted me to talk about Merrick in front of him. It's because he has feeling for me. My best friend is in love with me. Well, maybe not love, that's a pretty powerful word, but he definitely feels something. I then wonder about how long he's felt that way.

I feel the cold air against my skin and know I can't stay here forever. It doesn't help that winter brings an early sunset. I crawl beneath the fence and make my way home, thinking more about the kiss and Gale. I think of what this will mean for us, if it will change anything. I really hope it doesn't. I don't want to lose him.

It is the day before the Victory Tour begins. I decide to go into the woods one more time before I leave. Gale isn't with me this time. He is working in the mines. I slip under the fence and quickly check the snare line, finding three rabbits. I then reset the snares, hoping I can make them as well as Gale can. He's always been a natural when it comes to snares. Unfortunately, this is all I have time for. My prep team will arrive this evening and the torture will really begin. I am really dreading the waxing. That's the worst part.

I head back to District 12 to the Hawthorne house where I drop off the rabbits. I say goodbye to Mrs. Hawthorne and Gale's three siblings before leaving. I also tell his mother to tell him I said goodbye and that I'll see him when I get back. I wish I couldn't have talked to him before I left so we could talk about the kiss. We still haven't done that yet. He's been too busy with work.

When I enter my house, I find my mother breathe a sigh of relief. I take off my boots and start towards my room, looking for a little solitude before I have no time to myself. I feel my mother wrap her hand around my arm to stop me.

"Did you have a nice walk?" she asks. I give her a look, now confused. She knew I was going hunting. I told her just in case, with the weather reports calling for a severe snowstorm. Out of the corner of my eye I can see a man in a suit. He's not from around here. It's then I know something is wrong.

"Yes, it was good to see the District one last time before I leave. It's getting slippery out there. I fell twice."

"Someone is here to see you." she then tells me.

"They're here already?" I say rolling my eyes.

"No Katniss, it's not—" She is cut off by the man in the suit that approaches. He tells me to follow him to the study. When I get to the door, I open it and he nudges me forward. As soon as I enter, the scent of roses and blood pierce my nose. I no longer have to wonder about who my mystery guest is. He turns around in the chair and faces me. Now I can only wonder why President Snow is sitting in my study, in my house, all the way in District 12.

What did you think about this chapter? What did you like/not like?

Get ready for next chapter, it's going to be good. It's going to center mostly around the tour in District 2...and you know who lives in District 2 ;)