Anything for Love
Chapter 8: The One Where Joey Won't Sleep With Phoebe
Phoebe slammed her purse down on the table, and then threw her self down into her chair with a huge sigh upon meeting Rachel and Monica at the Olive Garden for lunch on their lunch breaks.
"Sheesh, what's up with you? Trouble in paradise already?" Monica asked with a smirk. She knew that Phoebe was a little dramatic about everything, but she also knew they could all be that way, even herself at times.
"Yes! No. I don't know. I hope not," Phoebe said. She sipped her raspberry iced tea that Monica and Rachel had ordered for her before she got there.
Rachel reached over and gently rubbed her shoulder. "What did Joey do now, honey?"
"It's not about what he did, but what he didn't do," Phoebe commented as she grabbed her menu and looked it over.
"What didn't he do?" Monica asked; curious now.
Phoebe looked up from her menu. "What he didn't do with Rachel." She looked back down at her menu, then set it down. She had already decided to stick with the soup, salad, and breadstick combo. She was glad the minestrone soup had no meat.
Rachel tried to pick her brain to figure out what Phoebe was saying. "What didn't Joey and I do?" Then it dawned on her and her mouth dropped. "Oh!"
"What? What wouldn't he do with Rachel? It's been a few years since they dated. I need a mind refresher." Monica sipped her wine. She usually didn't drink this early, but she wanted a moment to sit and relax with her friends. With Chez Monica in full swing, and two wild twins, she didn't get to do that too often anymore.
"He won't sleep with me, okay?" Phoebe asked just as the waiter came to the table to take their orders. He smirked.
"What are you smirking at? I'm sure there are plenty of girls that won't sleep with you!" Phoebe snapped, even more irritated than usual.
"Phoebe! Don't be rude," Monica scolded. Working in the restaurant business, she hated it when customers were rude to the staff for no good reason.
"Sorry," Phoebe snapped.
"She's just sexually frustrated," Rachel whispered to him.
"Okay, okay. Can we please move on to the food?" Phoebe asked, a little embarrassed now. "I'll have the Minestrone soup, a salad, and the breadsticks. I'll also have some extra dressing on the side. I swear they always give you like two drops of dressing for a huge bowl of salad here. It's barely enough to cover a leaf!"
"Of course," the waiter said with a nod as he wrote down her order, keeping his professionalism.
Rachel and Monica both ordered, and then once the waiter left, Monica turned on Phoebe.
"Phoebs, that was so rude! It's not his fault Joey won't sleep with you!" Monica scolded.
Phoebe glared at her. "So what? It's my fault?"
"Come on you two, calm down," Rachel said gently.
Monica shook her head. "I wasn't saying that, Phoebe. You know, Joey. Maybe he just hasn't gotten the picture of what you want yet."
"We get close to it, but every time we do, he pulls away. He has to work the next morning, or he doesn't feel good. He suddenly has a headache or his stomach hurts from all the food he just ate." Phoebe explained. "He always says we have time, but when is this time he's talking about? To him, it's never time. Meanwhile, I feel I'm going to explode if I don't have him soon!"
"Well, there's always other things you can use without Joey to help things along," Monica said with a smirk.
Rachel elbowed her. "Don't be disgusting!"
"I don't want to have sex with myself, I want to have sex with Joey, damn it!" Phoebe snapped, a little louder than she had planned to.
Several eyes from other tables fell upon her.
"Was I talking to you? No. Shoo!" Phoebe motioned them away her hand so that they would all go back to minding their own business. She turned back to Rachel. "I'm just worried he realized that he doesn't have romantic feelings for me. I mean, that's he reason you two could never sleep together, right? It just felt too weird?"
Rachel smiled gently, and squeezed her hand over the table. "Phoebs, that was different. Joey and I had nothing in common. We were definitely not meant to be anything more than just friends. I think we both went temporarily insane even toying with the idea of being more than friends. You two, however, are an entirely different story."
Monica nodded. "Have you seen the way Joey looks at you? The way he's always looked at you? He looks at you in a way I still can't get Chandler to look at me!"
Rachel nodded. "He looks at you as if the sun sets on you and the moon rises on you. You've always been his favorite."
Phoebe grinned, and twirled some hair around her finger. "You really think so?"
Rachel nodded. "I have no doubt in my mind."
"We know so!" Monica confirmed. "Trust me, honey, men can be stupid—especially Joey!"
Phoebe shot her a look. "Watch it! I know I called him stupid once, but I was wrong. He's wonderful and I love him!"
"We all love him as a person, Phoebs. We just mean that it takes him a little longer to get the point," Rachel said gently.
"I suppose I can't argue with that," Phoebe said.
"What you need to do, Phoebs, is make it so that he cannot resist you, nor can he miss what you have in mind," Monica instructed.
"Why do I have to work so hard though? Usually sex is the first and only thing on Joey's mind besides food!" Phoebe said, her arms crossed over her chest.
"Then it shouldn't be all that hard for you to seduce him," Rachel said to her.
Phoebe looked at them with pleading eyes. "Can you guys help me? Give me some good ideas. You're both even better at it than me, being married to a real man and not married to a jackass like Mike."
Rachel and Monica grinned at each other, and then back at Phoebe.
"We thought you'd never ask," Rachel said, both she and Monica grinning with excitement.
"It was really nice of you to offer to give me a free massage," Joey said as Phoebe brought out her massage table. They were at her apartment that night, and she was planning on giving Joey a massage like he never had before.
"Like I'd ever make you pay for one!" Phoebe said with a smile.
"I never have to pay for massages, but I'd be willing to pay you because I bet yours are even better than anyone else's!" Joey said.
"I don't even want to think about anyone else messaging you," Phoebe said, already feeling the jealousy well up in her. She bet that any past girlfriend of his who had massaged him had gotten exactly what she wanted—maybe even before the massage.
She lit candles around the room, but kept the lights on so that she could see what she was doing. She turned on a CD of love songs, and then she got the oil out.
"I can hardly wait for this," Joey said with a grin. "You know, out of all the years we've known each other, I don't know if I've ever gotten a Phoebe Buffay massage."
"Yeah, well you're in for a treat!" Phoebe informed him. And then some…
"How does coconut vanilla sound for your massage oil?" Phoebe asked.
Joey smiled. "That sounds nice and relaxing, and not too girly. It's perfect." He stripped off his shirt, and Phoebe licked her lips. She couldn't wait to oil him up.
"You should take your socks and jeans off too," she said simply.
Joey shrugged. "All right." He did as told, leaving his underwear on.
Phoebe bit her bottom lip. She definitely needed tonight to be the night. "You can get on the table now."
Joey did as told, and laid on his stomach.
Phoebe knew it was then time for the final touch. She dropped her bathrobe that she had been wearing, revealing her red lace underwear and bra set.
Joey, being on his stomach hadn't noticed yet. She put a good amount of the oil on her hands, then slowly massaged it into Joey's shoulders.
Joey moaned. "Mm, that's the stuff!"
"You like that?" Phoebe asked with a smirk. "This is only the beginning," she purred into his ear.
He moaned again in response.
She massaged his back, and then his neck, inducing more pleasured moans from him.
She then massaged his ears, his arms, his hands and fingers, and then moved on to his legs, and his feet and toes.
She then decided to be bold. After all, that was her whole plan for the night. "Let's get these off you," she purred, placing her hands on the sides of his underwear band.
Joey quickly turned around; thwarting her plan. "What are you doing?"
Phoebe blushed. "I thought you might like a full body massage."
Joey registered what she was wearing then. "Why are you wearing that? What happened to your clothes?"
"I ditched the robe." She slowly ran her hands over his oil slickened chest and kissed his neck. "I don't really need it anyway, do I?"
"You're going to get oil in your mouth," he said, avoiding her question.
Phoebe grinned at him. "That's the beauty of this oil," She whispered into his ear," It's edible." She then licked a slow trail up his neck.
Joey moaned, and she thought she had him just wear she wanted him, but then he got up off the table. "Thanks for the massage. I'm sorry to leave to early, but I have an early call time tomorrow, and I'm feeling like I need to use the bathroom. That burrito I had from the gas station did not set right with me."
"You can use my bathroom," Phoebe offered.
Joey blushed. "I'd feel more comfortable using the one in the privacy of my hotel room if you don't mind."
Phoebe was disappointed. "Okay."
Joey made quick work of redressing. He then kissed her cheek. "Thanks for the massage, Phoebes. It was the best I've ever had; just as I knew it would be."
He then left.
Phoebe sighed as she shut the door and locked it behind him. It was the same ol' excuses. Lucky for her, she still had a few tricks up her sleeve. This wasn't over yet!
The next day, Joey had acted like nothing happened. Rachel and Monica had heard from Phoebe how the massage had gone, and they urged her to put her next plan into motion ASAP.
"You need to go for it while the getting is good! Don't be afraid to get aggressive. Men need that sometimes," Monica said to her over a three-way call.
"This is Joey we're talking about. He used to have sex with practically every woman he met! He's actually in love with you, so it should be a piece of cake to get him in bed," Rachel added. "Don't shy off. Go get him, girl!"
"I'll do my best," Phoebe said, hating that she felt like a little kid getting advice from her sisters. Heck, she was older than of them, yet lately, they got more action that she'd been getting. Then again, they were married, she wasn't. Well, she was, but not for long….
Soon her husband would be married to someone else. Not that she cared anymore, but it still hurt a little. She guessed it was a good thing they didn't have kids after all. Mike had shown his true colors when he had cheated on her with an eighteen-year-old.
"Joey and I have plans to have dinner together tonight. I'm thinking after dinner I can put my plan into action. I thought of going to bed before dinner, but Joey can't function on an empty stomach," Phoebe explained.
"Tonight is the night then!" Rachel said with a happy squeal for her friend. "Just do the thing I told you about and I assure you, tomorrow you will be telling us all about the amazing night you had," she assured her.
"I hope you're right," Phoebe replied.
"Good luck tonight," Monica said. "Though I'm sure you won't need it!"
"Thanks," Phoebe said.
They said their goodbyes, and then Phoebe hung up the phone. She sighed, then went to grab her bag. She had to prepare for tonight.
Dinner went well. The conversation was great, and the meal was delicious. They had the best chocolate cake for dessert, though that wasn't the dessert Phoebe was counting on.
When they got to Joey's room at The Plaza after, Joey wasn't even going to invite her in at first.
"I know I always say this, but I have an early call time tomorrow, and I have a few business calls I should make tonight," he said. "But dinner was wonderful, and the company even better." He pulled her close and kissed her so passionately that there was no way she was going to just leave it at that!
"Actually, do you mind if I come up and use your bathroom before I leave?" Phoebe quickly asked. "I know I should have gone at the restaurant, but public toilets always gross me out. I don't like to use them unless absolutely necessary."
"So I guess you ever using an outhouse is out of the question?" Joey teased.
Phoebe made a face. "Ugh! Gross! Don't make me barf."
Joey laughed. "Sure you can use my bathroom."
"Thanks!" Phoebe said with a smile.
They kissed again, then headed up to his room.
When they got there, Phoebe headed straight into the bathroom with her bag. She planned on wasting no time.
Joey was on the phone when Phoebe exited the bathroom ten minutes later. His mouth dropped open when he saw her coming out of the bathroom. Her makeup was redone. Her eyes were lined thickly in black eye liner, and her lashes seemed to have grown darker, curvier, and longer. Her lips looked fuller somehow and were a candy apple red. Her hair was up in a messy yet sexy bun, and she wore nothing but a red lacy pair of practically see thru- thong underwear with a bow over the front of the waistband. For her top, she was wearing nothing but a giant silk red ribbon tied in a bow over her breasts. She smiled at him.
"I got to go. I will see you tomorrow…. Okay. You too…. Thanks…. Bye." He hung up the phone, and whistled. "Woah, Phoebs, is this what you always look like when you come out of the bathroom?" He teased with a shy smile.
Phoebe motioned him over with a finger. "Come here."
Joey got up off the bed and cautiously walked over to her. "You look incredible."
Phoebe grinned. "I know." She pulled him close, and began kissing him passionately.
He moaned as he kissed her back just as passionately, his hands slowly roaming down the sides of her body.
"Aren't you going to unwrap me?" she purred into his ear. "I promise you, I'm the gift that keeps on giving."
He moaned again, but to her surprise, instead of doing as she had suggested, he backed away from her. "Not like this, Phoebs."
Phoebe felt as if she had just been slapped in the face. "What do you mean not like this?"
"I mean, not like this!" Joey said. "Phoebe, our first time together is not going to be like this. We have time. We don't need to rush anything."
Phoebe was annoyed now. "I'm beginning to think you're either gay, or you're having second thoughts bout being anything more than just friends with me."
"Hey! Joey Tribbiani is not gay!" Joey quickly said, wagging a finger at her.
"But I'm right about you not wanting to be anything more than just friends with me," Phoebe stated.
Joey shook his head. "No, that's not it either."
"Then what the hell is it, Joey?" Phoebe snapped. "You used to sleep with anyone, and now you won't even sleep with me—your girlfriend!"
Joey pulled her close. "I'm not the same Joey I used to be. I don't feel the need to sleep around any longer."
"I should hope not!" Phoebe said. "If you are sleeping around with other girls, and that's why you don't need me—"
"How could you even suggest something like that?" Joey asked.
"I know you're not. I'm just saying that if you were, we'd be so through," Phoebe explained.
Joey kissed her gently. "You're the only woman for me, Phoebs. I just really need to take a shower, make another phone call, and then get to bed for my early call time tomorrow."
Phoebe sighed. "Fine. I'll see myself out."
Joey smirked. "You may want to get dressed first."
"Yeah, yeah," Phoebe said. She headed into the bathroom, redressed, and then headed back into the room.
Joey pulled her close and rubbed her back. "Are we cool?"
"Yeah, we're cool," Phoebe grumbled.
He kissed her a little more passionately. "Good things come to those who wait," he murmured in her ear.
"I'd like to not have to wait until I'm fifty!" Phoebe said.
Joey laughed. "It will not be that long, I promise." He saw her to the door, then after kissing her one last time, and asking her to call him when she got home, he went to take a shower.
Phoebe walked down the hallway a bit, and waited ten minutes. Then, she headed back to Joey's room. She had one last trick up her sleeve, compliments of Monica.
She used the extra key he had given a week before to get into his room, knowing he would be in his shower by now.
Sure enough, when she entered the room, she heard the water in the bathroom running.
She closed the door, then quickly undressed. She left nothing on this time. She shook out her hair from the bun, and then slipped into the bathroom.
She tiptoed over to the shower and pulled the curtain back. "Do you need someone to wash your back for you?" she asked in her best sexy tone.
Joey jumped; not having expected company in the shower. "Phoebe! What the heck? I thought you left!" He covered his eyes with his hand and looked away.
"I thought you might change your mind about not being together tonight," Phoebe said. She looked away too. She suddenly felt dirty. He clearly did not want to see her naked, so she figured why should she be seeing him naked?
"Why would I change my mind?" Joey asked.
"Good question. I'm sorry. This was clearly a mistake. I'll go now," Phoebe said, pushing the curtain back and quickly heading out.
"Phoebe…." Joey didn't know what to say. He was still in shock. He decided just to let her go. He felt it would be less embarrassing for both of them if he just let her go for now. He'd call her later.
Phoebe quickly dressed, then left the room. Three strikes you're out. She was beginning to think, with a sinking feeling that, despite what he had said, Joey really didn't want to be more than friends with her. It had to be the same thing happening to him that had happened to him with Rachel. It was just too weird for him.
She headed home depressed. Maybe, she was destined to be alone forever, she thought. The thought depressed her even more.
Phoebe almost didn't answer the phone when Joey called her that night. She was in bed and just wanted to go to sleep and forget about their embarrassing shower encounter that night. However, she decided to suck it up and answer. "Hello."
"Phoebs. I thought you were going to call me when you got home. I was worried something happed to you!" Joey said.
Even thought he couldn't see her, Phoebe shrugged. "Sorry. I forgot."
Joey sighed. "Phoebs, it's not that I don't want to sleep with you. You have no idea how hard it was for me to resist you tonight, or even when you gave me the massage—or any time really."
"Then why have you, been, Joey? You never had a problem sleeping with a woman before, other than Rachel. What's wrong with me? Why won't you sleep with me?" Phoebe asked. She couldn't help but have hurt feelings over this.
"I just don't want us to rush things. When we're finally together in that way, I want it to be perfect and special; not just some lust-filled night," Joey explained.
"We're not virgins, Joey, and we're certainly not teenagers anymore," Phoebe reminded him.
"I know, but… Look. All my life I've just had casual sex. With Alex it meant more, but even with her it wasn't…. It wasn't what I feel for you. You're not just some girl I picked up, Phoebe. You're my Phoebe. You mean more to me than you could ever know, and I just want things to be perfect. I want the time to be right for the both of us."
Phoebe smiled. She loved when he called her his. "I understand that, Joey, but when do you think you'll be ready? I'm getting tired of waiting."
"I don't want us to sleep together because of lust. I want it to be different with us. I want to make love and not just have sex. I love you, Phoebe. I don't want it to be vulgar or dirty feeling. That's why I didn't want you to just offer yourself to me. I also didn't want our first time to be in the shower. You deserve so much more that just sex, Phoebe. You deserve the best I can give you," Joey said. It was the most honest he had been with anyone, but he felt that Phoebe deserved his honesty.
"Wow. You really have grown up since you left New York, Joey," Phoebe said; impressed.
Joey laughed. "I wouldn't say grown up. Let's just say, I've grown a little wiser with age and experience."
"Well, as much as I hate waiting, what you said is really romantic. You're worth the wait, Tribbiani, but please don't make me wait too long. I love you. I promise you it won't just be about sex. I love you so much it hurts," Phoebe admitted. She was in turn more honest with him than she usually was with other guys. However, she knew she could tell Joey anything and he would never judge her. It was one of the many things that made him so special to her.
"It won't be long, Baby. I don't think I have that much will power to keep putting you off for much longer!" Joey teased.
"I love you," Phoebe said.
"I love you too, Phoebs. Goodnight, Sweetheart."
"Goodnight, Joey."
They both hung up with smiles on their faces.
They both then tuned off their lights and went to sleep, thinking about how they couldn't wait to be together in the most special way.
"Soon, Phoebs," Joey said to his empty room. "Soon, and it will be so worth the wait."
He drifted off to sleep with Phoebe still heavily on his mind.