Jon
He sat quietly as Lord Stark told him the story, unsure of how to feel. He felt glad to finally know his story, but also he was angry, angry at Lord Stark and angry at Rhaegar and his mother. They're actions brought about misery on both their families and nearly destroyed the Seven Kingdoms, if they had to run off, they could have at least explained themselves somehow, let them know that Lyanna was safe. But they didn't and Westeros suffered the consequences.
He shook his head at the thought as he sat staring at the box on his desk. Their two sigils linked by Winter Roses and a Red Sun rising behind them. The Houses Stark, Targaryen and Martell. He thought of how ridiculous it was, to have Elia Martell's symbol beside the symbol of her husband's love for another man.
He thought of hiding it under his bed, getting it out of sight, but curiosity was getting the better of him and slowly he reached out and opened the box.
There were many letters as his uncle had said. Half were opened and half were sealed. He looked at the first opened letter; it was a birth certificate.
We hereby announce the birth of our son, Maekar Targaryen. He is trueborn before the Old Gods and the New and second in line to the Iron Throne.
Signed by Rhaegar Targaryen and Lyanna Stark, as witnessed by Ser Arthur Dayne.
He stared at his birth scroll, looking at his name. Maekar Targaryen. There was only one Maekar before, the father of Aegon the Unlikely. He wondered why his mother chose this particular name. Rhaegar chose it perhaps, this was written before he died.
He unfolded another scroll.
The marriage of Rhaegar Targaryen and Elia Martell is hereby dissolved. Their children remain trueborn and will be treated equally to any other trueborn of Rhaegar Targaryen. Aegon Targaryen remains the first in the line of succession to the Iron Throne.
Signed by the High Septon as witnessed by Rhaegar Targaryen, and Ser Arthur Dayne.
So Aegon and Rhaenys were to remain legitimate. It made Jon somewhat better about his parents, at least they wanted to be fair to the children.
The next scroll was the marriage certificate.
Rhaegar Targaryen and Lyanna Stark have been wed before the Light of the Seven, with Arthur Dayne, Oswell Whent, and Gerold Hightower as witnesses. The marriage was also said before a Heart Tree in the Northern customs.
Signed by the High Septon as witnessed by Arthur Dayne, Oswell Whent and Gerold Hightower.
His parents married before both faiths. The reality dawned on Jon slowly. He was trueborn, legitimate before the Old Gods and the New. All this time he had been set aside, treated as someone separate, other while he was as true as everyone else. His anger at Lord Stark came to the fore, but it has gotten easier to keep it down now that he knew the whole story.
He studied the other letters and picked up one addressed to his mother. His eyes widened.
To my silver prince,
I miss you dearly, I miss your voice, your smile, the warmth of your presence.
I grow frustrated more and more everyday. Ned is going on and on about Robert Baratheon like we are married already. In every letter he says he cannot wait fir the wedding and knows that Robert will make me happy. I love my brother, I do, but he can't see past Baratheon. From what I know Robert feels the same about Ned. I sometimes think that it's not even me that Robert is obsessed with. I believe it is all about Ned, he wants to be his brother and he's using me to get it. Robert sings my name from the Vale as if he actually knows me. Unlike you, he made no attempt to understand me. You know me Rhaegar, you know me as I am and unlike so many others you would not change about me. My silver prince, with each letter I grow to love you more everyday. Winterfell is becoming like a cage, a cage where I am to await my marriage to a man I don't love.
Your wolf, Lyanna Stark
Jon picked up the letter behind the previous one.
My wolf,
I despair to hear of your turmoil. But do not judge your brother for the love he has for his friend, the brother by choice is often as dear as your brother by blood. I know what it is like to marry out of duty. Elia is one of the kindest and most wonderful women, but my love for her is like that of a dear friend and the mother of my children, not to a woman who keeps my heart. You are that woman Lyanna. I think of you everyday, of the spirit in your eyes, the ferocity of your heart, your smile that shines with life. I have tried, I must admit, tried to forget you. But while having my children near me is the greatest joy of my life, you have left a hole in my life that I cannot heal. I love you, Lyanna, you are the moon to my sun, the night to my day, the ice to my fire.
Your silver prince, Rhaegar Targaryen
Reading the two letters was strange. On one hand Jon felt like it was too lonely people finding understanding between one another, but then he thought once again of the Kingdom's suffering. He signed and turned to his mother's other letters. These were not as romantic, it seemed to him that in the beginning they thought of each other as friends. His mother would talk of her father and brothers, her new mare and Jon even laughed lightly at some stories about Uncle Brandon and Uncle Ben.
His father wrote of his wife and children and it seemed to Jon that he did care about them. He wrote fondly of little Rhaenys and her black cat Balerion, of how little Aegon looked like his father yet had his mother's warm smile, and of Elia and her brother Oberyn.
Jon felt odd reading the letters, they were proof of a forbidden love that cost thousands of lives, of two families that had torn each other apart.
He put the letters aside and looked at the pile of sealed letters beneath the box. On the first Rhaegar had written"
"My children's birthright. For them and them alone. You have your father's love."
Jon hesitated, staring at Rhaegar's words, then set the letter down. He wasn't ready to hear what Rhaegar wrote to him and his half siblings. There were three letters beneath that with the Targaryen symbols: Rhaenys, Aegon, Maekar.
He set all three down, but couldn't help but open the next one. The words "To my boy Maekar from his mother" made him tear up again.
My love,
If you are reading this then my worst fears have come true and I am gone. If so, I'm sorry I wasn't there to see your first steps, to watch you ride a horse, to see you smile.
I know not what you will think of me once you have learnt the entire truth. All I can say is that me and your father never meant for any of the horror we have unleashed on the Seven Kingdoms to come. We were selfish and rush and I will understand if you hate me for that. But now that I have done all I could to prevent it. I feared they may find me before I said my vows to your father, so I left no explanation. I did not realise they would find out Rhaegar met with me, or that they assumed he had taken me away. I wrote to explain, to Winterfell, to the Vale, and even to Robert, but none of my letters reached them. I do not deny that we have caused this Rebellion and all this death, but something happened and none of my words reached the people who rose up to rescue me, I do not know what. All I know is that my father and brother are dead because of my actions, that countless lives have been lost, including that of Elia and your brother and sister
My boy, all I can promise is that my love for you will live on forever even after I am gone. Feeling you grow beneath my chest, I've never felt more alive and more proud. You are the one good thing that me and your father created in this Tower, and I know that my brother will love and care for you like his own son, for I know Ned will come for me and Wylla, who already loves you, swore to deliver you to my brother. He and Ben will ensure you are not alone and you will be loved. Your father said you are destined for great things, for you are a union of two worlds, ice and fire, a wolf and a dragon. I wish you all the best things in this world, my son.
Your mother, now and forever,
Lyanna Stark
Jon's tears spilled down from the parchment as he read his mother's words. All those years of wondering, of desire to know her, and though she was gone, reading her words made him feel like she was here with him. He could almost hear her voice.
"Mother" he whispered.
His anger lessened, for all she had done, he knew she had loved him and that was enough. He put the letter neatly back in the box, along with the others. He would not read Aegon and Rhaenys' letters, what was written there was not for him to read. As for everything else...
Reading his mother's letter was easier but he wasn't ready to know Rhaegar Targaryen just yet, he would one day, for as he slowly recovered from his shock, his curiosity was building up and he knew one day he would know what Rhaegar thought of him, but not today.
It felt strange to think of the Targaryens now. He grew up hearing stories of heroes and tyrants of Daeron and Maegor, of Aegon the Conqueror and his sister wives Rhaenys and Visenya. Of how they rode dragons and slain traitors and would be usurper, of how they slaughtered all in their path. The Targaryens, the dragons, descendants of the Valyrian empire. And they were his ancestors, Aegon, Aenys, Jaehaerys, Rhaenyra, Daeron, the first Maekar and his son the Egg. Was he truly one of them? Was he a dragon as his mother called him?
It hurt his head just to think of it. He didn't want to think about it. He didn't want to explore whatever kinship he had with the dragons. Not now, when he wasn't sure what to think of the man who he once called his father and those he once called his brothers and sisters. That was most important, not the history of a dead dynasty.
Abd there was something else on his mind, Lady Catelyn. He had guessed that if Lord Stark went south, then the Lady would not allow him to remain at Winterfell. Lord Stark had promised that he would take care of it. Would he tell her the truth? Or would he simply make it clear that Jon was allowed to stay whether she liked it or not? He knew that the matter would leave him in Winterfell with the both of them suffering each other's presence, but the former? What would that mean for them? Should she even know the truth? Should any of them know it? He felt his siblings (or his cousins?) deserved to know, despite his fears of how they would see him once they knew he wasn't their brother but a son of Rhaegar Targaryen, grandson of the man who murdered Rickard and Brandon Stark. He doubted he should tell them all at once. Perhaps tell Robb first, see how he would react and if he prayed, Robb accepted it or at least understood, he would tell the others, when they were older, perhaps. And Joanna? The girl whom trusted him with her greatest secret. The daughter and granddaughter of the men whom would see Jon dead? That he needed to think on carefully. But Lady Catelyn? He had always respected her, always, she was the wife to his father and the mother of his siblings, but it was hard to grow up with her looks of discomfort at best and disdain at worst. It made him angry at times, it made a part of him angry now, but hadn't she been just as deceived as he had? He understood that his uncle didn't know whether he could trust her when he first brought him home, but surely he could have told her then. And if Robert Baratheon and the Lannisters discovered the truth, then surely it would matter little if she knew or not? If the truth came out Lord Stark would be in danger as well, surely the Lady would stand with him? That alone was a danger. He thought of what his uncle told him, of how his wife had prayed for him when he was ill. She never wished him any harm and despite everything, she had allowed Jon to remain at Winterfell. Her father will have been ready to force his father to give him up, all it would take was her word. But she didn't. So perhaps she deserved the truth as well. He needed to think more on this, and make a decision before his father went South.
He placed the letter addressed to Maekar and the birthright letter back into the box, and something caught his eyes. At the bottom of the box, a letter with his mother's handwriting. He picked it up to get a closer look at the words.
To Robert Baratheon
Catelyn
When she saw the bastard storm out of the Godswood with her husband running after him, she actually felt fearful.
There was something in the boy's eyes, something she had never seen before. A look of ferocity, or fire and steel and pure rage, so much she actually froze. And the way he had walked right passed like she was nothing to him, he seemed like another boy. She hated to admit, but the boy had always been polite and calm, and seeing him like this brought genuine fear into her heart.
Ned wasn't himself after that, his kind was elsewhere with her, with Robert, with everyone. He had assured her that he would explain what had gone on between him and the boy, but as the day went by her husband's face darkened more and more.
The bastard meanwhile had stormed into his room and refused to let anyone enter. Not Robb, not Arya, no one. The children grew worried, Arya was upset and angry and demanded answers from Ned, who remained silent. Robb was concerned, sure something bad had happened to put the boy in such a state. Bran was worried as well, and Rickon felt something was wrong and asked her to take her to Jon.
The boy refused to unlock the door, assuring Rickon that he was alright and not to worry, and she found herself approving of the gentle way he handled her son's questions, but still fekt annoyed by his behavior. What would the King think if he noticed, on such an important occasion. But the bastard seemed invisible to the Southerners, gods, she herself was of the South, she followed their gods and customs, but they felt more and more like stranger to her after years of being surrounded by Northerners.
Catelyn decided to allow the bastard to recover from whatever had been said between him abd Ned, whispers had arrived saying that the boy wished to join the Night's Watch. It made Catelyn feel relieved. The boy would take vows, father no sons to threaten her children and grandchildren. He would have a place at the Wall, where Benjen will be like father to him, she would have to feel no ounce of shame at demanding he be removed. She was doing the boy a kindness, he would find no love here, not from her.
The words in her head were familiar and brought her back to one of the worst days in her life.
Winterfell 283 AC
Saying goodbye to her father and brother had been hard. Lysa had already gone to join her new husband in King's Landing, where anarchy was still at large. The Lannister's betrayal of the dragons had cost many lives and Jon Arryn was doing his best to restore order to the Seven Kingdoms. This would not be easy, Dorne would never forgive the murder of Elia Martell and her children.
The thought made her shudder and she held Robb closer. Her son looked like her, blue eyes and auburn hair, but there was at least some Stark in him. Still, it made Catelyn sad that her husband's heir would not look like him. Ned Stark was a decent man, she knew, aman of honor who would take care of her and their son. Whether she would love him she did not know. But he would be a good husband and good father.
It felt strange to see Winterfell as she approached. This was to be her home now, where she would live with her husband and their children to grow old as a wife to a Northern. The castle looked gloomy and unwelcoming, while the Northerns she laid her eyes on seemed suspicious and grim, praying to strange gods and telling tales of the Others and the Long Knight. She could only hope she could get used to it.
She felt relieved as the wheelhouse came to a halt and as she came out she saw Ned awaiting her. He had aged years to her, his hair was longer than he remembered, his beard had grown, and eyes were heavy, but lit up in wonder as she approached him with their son.
"My lady. May I?"
"Of course" she said with a smile, and passed the baby to him.
Ned smiled as he looked down at Robb with love and Catelyn's heart melted. Her husband was usually a grim and serious man, but the sight of him with their son showed that there was a warm heart behind all that ice.
"He is beautiful" he said in wonder and she felt relieved that he was not disappointed in his son's appearance.
Ned reached out his hand and she took it with a small smile, adjusting may be easier than she thought it would be.
But as they made their way towards their bedroom to tuck Robb in, she heard a cry emerge from one of the rooms.
"What is that, Ned" she asked when she saw the look on her husband's face.
"Catelyn, let me tuck Robb in we need to speak".
But she was already going towards the room as her husband went to quickly pjt Robb in his crib in their chambers. She found a different crib in the room, and a young woman standing over it.
"Hush, now, little one" she said before she saw Catelyn. "My lady".
"Who are you?" she asked suspiciously.
"Wylla, my lady," she said. " I am Jon's wetnurse."
"Jon's?" Catelyn asked as she went over the crib. A child lay within, one clearly younger than Robb, crying. She took in his grey eyes and growing dark hair as she slowly realized. She saw Ned enter the room.
"What is this, Ned?" she asked quietly.
Ned sighed, looking guilty.
"This is Jon," he said, his voice heavy. "My son".
The words were like a thunderstrike to Catelyn. She stumbled slightly feeling off balance as she looked between Ned and the babe, seeing the resemblance as the truth hit her.
Her heart broke, she felt, at the thought of how this boy had come to being, and anger came to the fore as she looked at the man she had trusted and who dishonored her.
Compose yourself, a voice said. Men father bastards, this isn't a surprise to you.
So she steadied herself as Ned looked down in shame.
"I see," she said, trying to keep her voice in control. "How long is he staying?"
Ned looked like he meant to sigh. Instead he looked her in the eyes. Grey to blue.
"He will be living here now, my lady."
She shook slightly as this dawned on her. Surely this was a mistake. A mummary. Men fathered bastards and there had been a war. Ned may well not have returned; she could understand that perhaps even forgive it. She'd ensured the boy was looked after as was right, but this. This wasn't supposed to happen. These things didn't happen.
But as she looked into Ned's eyes she saw he meant it and she wanted to scream but instead she stormed out past him, leaving him with his son.
She abd Ned slept in different chambers for many nights after that as she slowly came to terms with what happened. Her father was disappointed, he had thought Ned a better man. He had tried, like she had, to have the boy sent away, but Ned was persistent, even growing angry at one point and declaring that Jon was his son and his place was with him. He always looked at Jon like he was his true son, he certainly looked like him, and Catelyn would admit she felt jealous of the boy and his mother, whom Ned had refused to name.
None of her children seemed to share her jealousy, none her concerns about the threat his existence posed to their future. Sansa stayed away from him mostly, but there was no mistrust between them, and Catelyn wasn't sure what to think of this. What if the boy one day rose up to take what was theirs and they didn't even see it coming? Sometimes these thoughts kept her up at night.
But now the boy was going to the Watch, her fears would now fade and the hold that existed between her and Ned would heal after years with the boy finally away. The boy himself would be happier for it.
She was in her room sewing as a pastime. The King was drinking again while Cersei Lannister was spending the afternoon with Joanna in the glass gardens. She hoped the girl was well. She tried to be as motherly to her as she ought to be. She had hoped the girl would have a more kindred spirit as a Southerner, but she had adapted to the North better than Cately, and had even stopped visiting the Sept, leaving her, Septa Mordane and the Septon disappointed, for they had expected another kindred spirit in this strange land. But the girl was clever and good natured and despite the Lannister woman's nature, she hoped Joanna would not miss a mother in her life. Catelyn sadly knew what the lack of a mother was like.
Maester Luwin knocked on her doors and she bid him in with a smile. The man handed her a letter and she was happy to see her sister's handwriting. She had worried for Lysa since her husband's death, her sister sent no word for too long, but now she had and Catelyn was ready to be of assistance. But as she read her heart grew cold and she jumped upwards.
"We must find Ned, I must speak with him immediately." Maester Luwin went with her, looking concerned.
Ned was in his solar almost like he was awaiting her and she saw his heavy eyes.
"My lady, I hoped to speak with you".
"It can wait" she said urgently.
"Catelyn?"
"Close the door," she told Luwin.
""Perhaps I should withdraw".
"No" said Catelyn, going over to the fireplace and began to light it.
"Cat, what is this?"
"I received a message from Lysa. A warning, if we have the wits to hear it, in a private language me and my sister once had."
"Tell me" Ned said darkly.
"Lysa says Jon Arryn was murdered."
Ned's eyes widened as he gripped her arm.
"By whom?"
"The Lannisters," she told him. "The queen."
"Gods" Ned said, releasing her arm. . "Your sister is sick with grief. She cannot know what she is saying."
She knows," Catelyn said. "My sister is impulsive, but this message was carefully planned. She knew it meant death if her letter fell into the wrong hands . To risk so much, she must have had more than mere suspicion. Now we truly have no choice. You must be Robert's Hand. You must go south with him and learn the truth."
Ned signed.
"The only truths I ever knew were the North".
"The Hand of the King has great power, my lord, '' Luwin said knowingly. "To find the truth and bring the killer's to justice. And protect Lady Arryn and her son should the worst be true".
"The Others take both of you," Ned muttered darkly, turning to the window. "My father went south and never returned."
"Different time and a different king".
Ned signed.
"Maester, may you leave us?"
"Certainly, my lord" Luwin said bowing and left, leaving her and her husband alone.
"You shall stay in Winterfell as we decided. Sansa, Arya and Bran come with me."
She signed. It would be so hard to not see his face, feel his arms. And her children. Sansa, so beautiful and poignant, Arya, wild yet so strong. Bran who loves to climb so much...
"Alright" she said, against herself.
"There is another matter to discuss." He turned to her heavily. "Jon".
Catelyn's heart sank.
"What about him? I know he plans to join Benjen in the Watch. Is this what you and him..."
"Jon wishes to remain at Winterfell" Ned said, his voice firm. "I want you to allow that."
Catelyn shook to the core at the words. How could the boy be so foolish?
"He'll find no love here"
"He will from Robb and Rickon, that's enough for him. Cat, I am begging you, like I never begged for anything before."
She laughed dryly on her rising anger.
"I let that bastard remain here for fourteen years. If I asked my father he would ride down here and have him taken away. But I didn't. And for fourteen years I've suffered the constant reminder of what you did. Do you think I want him to suffer? I'm sending him away because I can barely look at him and he can see that."
"Winterfell is Jon's home. It always will so long as I'm Lord, I love you Cat..."
"But not like his mother," Catelyn snapped.
"No," Ned said calmly as she stared. "You are the only woman I would have for a wife, Cat always and forever" he said reassuringly, stepping forward to take her trembling hand. "But I made a promise to his mother and I must honor it."
She shook her head.
"Why did he change his mind?" she said angrily.
"Because I told him who his mother was," Ned said.
Catelyn swallowed and stared at him gravely, and expectantly.
"Well?" she said and Ned sighed in frustration.
"That's Jon's now, not mine. But do not go asking him about it, please my lady, for as you have seen he is very confused."
"Don't I deserve the truth?" she asked quietly.
"That's not up to me to decide, Cat," he reminded her.
She snatched her hand away from him.
"Fine, keep your bastard here and shame me again."
She stormed out of the room as darkness gripped her soul. She could feel her husband's eyes on her as she left and a part of her had wished to run back, say she understands, back she couldn't. She couldn't.
Joanna
Being a sister was quite pleasant, she found. Spending time with Tommen and Myrcella brought her joy, the sort she should have had with Joffrey, who seemed uninterested in any of them. Myrcella was a clever girl fond of flowers, while Tommen was more meek but still a bright child if a bit naive, and he adored the cat she had given him despite the animal's grumpy nature. She enjoyed the times they spent together very much, but sometimes their mother joined them and it made it awkward. They didn't speak to each other much and there was always a formality between them.
But her thoughts were soon preoccupied when Jon locked himself in his room and didn't come out even to Robb and Arya, she had tried to reach out as well but her brother and sister occupied her. She pretended to be happy for their sake, but they noticed something was wrong. She tried to soothe them that she was feeling ill, but her mind went back to Jon. Something had gone on between her friend and Lord Stark and since then Lord Stark had brooded consistently while Jon remained unseen. She so badly wanted to found out what had happened, but Lord Stark remained silent despite even Arya's best efforts.
When she finally had a moment, Jon had emerged and despite his assurances she could see he was far from well and so she eagerly waited for him to explain everything as he had promised and she could only hope she knew how to help him. Meanwhile, her father seemed to have noticed the tension between her and her mother.
"Say Joanna" he said as they broke their fast, "why don't you show your mother around the glass gardens, sge could use some heat in this cold" he added as her mother glared at him.
"Yes, father, if mother would like to" she said unsurely.
Her mother looked at her and smiled.
"Of course, it would be lovely, I'm sure" she said and Joanna nodded, feeling awkward again.
The glass gardens were the warmest place in the North, she imagined, with the natural bot springs allowing the greenery to grow and making the greenhouses a truly beautiful place.
She and her mother strolled together by the flowers and fruits in silence. Her mother didn't look particularly interested but was still wearing a smile on her face.
"It's a beautiful place isn't it, mother" she said, hoping to break the awkward silence.
"Yes," her mother said after a moment. "It feels a bit like home here. My poor girl, stuck here in the cold."
"I don't mind," she said honestly as her mother looked at her and laughed.
"Did Ned Stark make a Northern woman out of you, my dear?" You walk and talk like one. I suppose you learned much here."
"I have" she answered. "Northerners are different from Southerners, mother. They keep to the ways of the First Men. Our culture is all Andal."
"That I know, Joanna. I never understood Northerners, how they are content with the harshness of winter or how they prefer quiet prayer to tree gods, rather than showing truer devotion. Have you stuck to our ways, my dear, to our gods."
Joanna didn't know what to answer. The truth was she hadn't prayed to the Seven in years. She hadn't prayed to any of the gods. And the harsh reality of the Northern winter had always made Joanna feel more alive than in the South.
She thought of lying to her mother, but the thought somehow made her thoughts tighten. Instead she looked for a distraction.
"Look" she said quickly, picking up a fresh rose, "have it mother, it would suit you".
"Thank you, my dear" her mother answered, taking the rose from her hand.
"Myrcella likes flowers, I'll take one for her" Joanna said as she placked another one.
" very thoughtful my dear. And your manners are in place that I can. I'm glad the Tully woman was here to make you a proper lady like that girl Sansa. Her sister though, a bit of a beast isn't she?"
"Arya is a very good girl, mother" Joanna said, feeling a surge of anger at the mocking that slipped through her mother's words. "She simply is more willful than most girls".
"Women are willful, Joanna, but a proper woman is more subtle. She has to be clever."
Her mother's eyes examined her.
"You were always clever weren't you, my dear, and you've grown quite beautiful."
She put her hand through Joanna's dark waves of hair.
"You remind me of my mother."
"Uncle Tyrion says that sometimes" Joanna said.
Her mother's eyes glowered slightly.
"You shouldn't spend so much time with him, Joanna. You are a woman now, and the Imp..."
"Don't call that mother" Joanna snapped suddenly as her mother seemed to catch herself, clearly not having meant to have said that.
"Your uncle" she quickly corrected. "You know how he behaves. You don't even know most of it. He drinks and whores and makes a fool of himself. It's a miracle he hasn't pulled something off at the feast."
"Uncle Tyrion has always been good to me, mother," Joanna said firmly, her meekness going away. "I don't care what he does in his free time or what other people think of him. Don't speak ill of your brother, please" sge finished and she found herself saying brother almost accusingly.
Her mother stared at her, seeing she was not the timid girl she had known before Winterfell, and then shrugged slightly.
"You've always been too attached to him, my dear, but let's not speak of him. Tell me more about Lord Stark. What does he get up to?"
"What do you mean?" Joanna asked, surprised at her mother's interest.
"I'm merely curious, my love. What are the Starks like now, these days?
"They're a strong House mother, they have been very good to me."
"I've no doubt of that," her mother said. "I hear the bannermen of the Starks are very loyal to them."
"Well, yes, they earn a lot of respect from most Houses." Joanna thought uncomfortably of House Bolton and the stories she heard of them.
"Joanna, did Lord Stark mention Jon Arryn? Before the news of his death of course."
"Jon Arryn? Why are you asking me this?" Joanna said suspiciously. Her mother wanted something, she could see that.
"Well, I heard Jon Arryn was planning a visit to Winterfell before he passed. Curious how he would abandon his duties as Hand, it must have been something important."
"I do not know mother, Lord Stark has mentioned receiving a raven informing of the visit just before news came of Lord Arryn's death. I don't recall anything else. You know Northerners mother, they keep to themselves".
Her mother sighed heavily, and Joanna could see relief mixed with worry on her face. Her mother wanted to get information out of her, she realised, but what did Jon Arryn and Lord Stark's relations matter to her.
The test of the walk was spent in silence except for a polite farewell when her mother excused herself. Joanna sighed as she went back into the castle. Her mother clearly wanted to know something about the Starks, but what? And now she wondered, why did Jon Arryn wish to visit Lord Stark? It was understandable before, a foster father wanted to see his ward after many years, but the way her mother had looked when she asked the questions implied there was more to it than that. Her mother was in no way on good terms with the Starks, their Houses had been at odds before Joanna was born, but there was another end to this. She could sense that and for some reason it worried her.
Ned
Cat's eyes were filled with anger and pain and he could do nothing to stop it. He could not deny Jon his place at Winterfell, but his wife would suffer because of it. This was his fault, his alone. He should have lifted the burden years ago, told her the truth knowing she would guard the secret, let go of her disdain and perhaps even grew closer to his son.
He tried to justify himself, knowing it would put her in danger, he told himself. But would it matter? Robert's fury would be great. A proof that Lyanna did not love him as he loved her, a son of Rhaegar Targaryen, and one whom Ned had kept from him through lies. That alone was dangerous even to Cat who knew nothing. Tywin Lannister would not care either. Jon would be a threat to his grandson and no matter what Ned did, he knew Tywin would see his son dead. See him dead as well, for he would die before he let Jon be harmed. And Cat? What would she do? She would stand with him, he knew, and be in as much danger as any of them.
He sat brooding over their fight in his solar. Jon could stay, she had said coldly, but he would find no love from her. His son would suffer and she would suffer as he had let them suffer fir many years. And what was he to do? The answer was on the back of his tongue, but he feared now what she would think of him when he told her it had all been a lie? That her shame and hurt had been built on lie and she hated a motherless child for no true reason other than her husband didn't trust her to keep his secret.
He sighed heavily and forced himself up, still brooding, as he left his solar to tell Jon he was allowed to stay. His son was awake and allowed him in. Ned sat on his desk and looked him in the eye.
"Lady Catelyn," Jon said quietly.
"It's done, Jon," he answered, trying to mask the sadness in his voice.
"How did she take it?"
"It doesn't matter," Ned answered with resignation.
"Yes it does" Jon said quietly.
"My wife is a good woman, Jon, she just..."
"I know, Lord Stark" Jon said firmly. "And I want you to end that."
Ned blinked in surprise.
"Jon?"
"I want you to tell her. I've known her scorn, yes, but I've seen how she looks at her children and I know she is a loving and good woman and I don't want her to suffer because of me."
"Jon, it's not..."
"No, it's not my fault. But that doesn't mean that I want things to stay the way they have been. She is your wife, Lord Stark, and she deserves the truth just as much as I did."
He rose.
"I want you to tell her who I am."
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