Alina stared blankly, her eyes losing focus as she sat frozen on the chair while Genya styled her hair. She was still in shock from her discovery last night.

It was him all this time

Kirigan had kept those letters, locked away in that small box, hidden away from Alina. Everything she had written had just been thrown away and never reached Mal and the same with his letters. All this time Alina thought Mal was angry with her, ignoring her, thinking he had turned away from her when really, he hadn't. He was there all this time and Kirigan made her think otherwise.

Why would he do that?

She put her trust into Kirigan, laid her feelings and thoughts on the table about her best friend and all he did was lie to her and give her false hope. First, he was keeping Baghra a secret and now he had kept Alina away from her best friend since she got here. Alina took everything back that she believed. Deep down in her heart she knew Mal would never just drop her, even after everything that happened in Kirbrisk but as time went on, she was starting to think otherwise.

Kirigan had lied straight to her face with that satisfied smirk on his lips, telling her he sent word out to the first army for Mal but in reality, he hadn't done a thing. Alina felt like an idiot for believing his lies. He was a master manipulator and if she hadn't of found the letters, she would have kept on believing him and eventually would have turned Mal away.

She didn't find any information on Baghra however and she also didn't get time to read the letters. The shock of everything made her anxious in that she didn't want Kirigan to wake up and catch her finding the letters. She had placed them back in the box and put it back in its place… but she wasn't done with them yet.

She needed to read every single one. She needed to see that Mal was still fighting for her, that he was still there for her as he always had been.

"Alina" she was brought out of her daze when Genya called her and she looked up with a blank look on her face.

"What's wrong with you today, you seem, out of sorts" Genya asked and Alina stared up at her, thinking of what to say. Then it clicked inside her.

Alina had given all her letters to Genya and asked her to post them to Mal. If Kirigan had them it meant that Genya never did post them and had given them straight to Kirigan. She too had lied to her face and pretended as if everything was hunky dory.

"Alina" she said again and Alina blinked back to reality. Her head was swirling with thoughts about everything and she couldn't seem to concentrate.

"Sorry, I'm just… thinking" Alina shrugged and Genya gave a concerned look.

"Well don't think too hard, you'll get wrinkles" Genya combed her fingers through Alina's hair, checking that it looked neat and tidy. Alina gave a stiff nod and watched as Genya packed up her kit.

"Right well I better get going, don't forget you have training with general Kirigan" Genya said and Alina froze.

She hadn't even thought about her training. Would she be able to stand next to the man who had kept her away from her best friend, watching as he acted like he had deceived her? Could she even trust him now? First Baghra, then Mal. What else has he been keeping from her.

Alina paced her room back and forth, twiddling her fingers. She didn't know what to do about training with Kirigan. She didn't even know if she brought up the letters with Kirigan, would he lie straight to her face or would he tell her the truth. She felt so stupid. She had kissed this man several times, believing he was a good man, a mentor to her and yet he kept this a secret ever since she arrived at the little palace.

Alina stopped and took a deep breath. Kirigan would be waiting for her and she couldn't spend any more time dawdling. Alina opened the door to her bedroom, her guards backs towards her and when they heard the door open, they smiled at her.

"Good morning Miss Starkov" they greeted and Alina glanced between the two.

What about them, did they have something to hid from her as well?

Her mind was overthinking everything now and she didn't know who to believe or who to trust. Alina stood frozen and there was a sick feeling inside her stomach. She couldn't do this, everything was so overwhelming, she felt as if she was going to have a panic attack.

"I- I can't attend training today, I don't feel so good, could you please tell Kirigan I won't be able to make it" she said and the guards gave her a concerned look.

"Do you need someone to come heal you, is something hurting" a look of panic washed over their faces and Alina shook her head.

"No, no… I think I just need some rest. I just want to be on my own" Alina said and the guards looked to each other for a second, silently talking with their eyes before nodding.

"Of course Miss Starkov, we will inform him" they said and Alina gave a small smile before shutting the door and leaning against it. She let out a sigh and ran her hands over her face, trying to clear her conscience.

She needed time to think about what she was going to do. She needed to see those letters. A theory popped in her mind thinking that perhaps Mal had said in the letters that he no longer wanted to know Alina and that's why Kirigan kept them from her, to spare the pain of losing her friend.

No, Mal would never

Alina hadn't realised her hands were shaking and she stormed to the bathroom, gulping down a glass of water to calm her nerves. She leant over the sink, trying to calm her breathing, breathing in through her nose and out through her mouth.

"Alina" a knock on the door made her jump and Kirigan's voice spoke behind. Alina stared at the door with wide eyes.

"Can I come in?" he asked.

No, I don't want you to come in

Alina gulped and looked in the mirror, seeing the dishevelled look on her face.

Perfect, that will make this more convincing

She ran to the door and took another deep breath, running over in her head what she was going to say. She opened the door and her eyes met Kirigan's. He furrowed his brows and Alina moved passed to let him enter. He stepped in silently and Alina shut the door, an awkward tension surrounding them.

"What's happened, are you feeling alright?" he asked quickly and Alina swallowed the hard lump in the back of her throat.

"I just don't feel to good today, I don't think I'll be able to train" she said and Kirigan looked at her with confusion and worry.

"What's wrong?" he said.

"I just feel a little sick, I think I need to rest for today". Kirigan stepped forward and placed a hand on her forehead, checking her temperature.

"You don't have a temperature and you haven't been near Baghra so it can't be that" he said.

Saints, I need to convince him

"It's more just my stomach, maybe I ate something bad, I don't know but I just don't feel up to training, I'm sorry to disappoint" she said softly and Kirigan shook his head.

"It's fine, I would rather you rest than make you feel worse. As long as you don't get worse. I'll have to have a word with the kitchen, make sure no one else catches anything" he said and Alina smiled.

"Thank you" she hoped he would leave but instead he stepped forward and kissed her on the lip. Alina froze, desperate wanting to shove him off her. how dare he kiss her after everything he has kept from her. Kirigan pulled back and Alina looked up at him.

"Get some rest, we'll train when you feel better" he said and Alina nodded. After that he did leave and Alina fell on the bed, letting out the breath she was holding in and shut her eyes. At least now she could think of what to do.

Hey so I hope you like it, what do you think will happen next, let me know in the reviews