Chapter Ten : Question

"I want to be in the top too, Ace." Luffy whined, kicking his feet and hitting Sabo in the face. They almost lose their balance but Sabo was quick to react and stomp his feet, stopping them from falling.

"Stupid!" Ace scolded. A familiar fist soon hit his brother's head making Luffy yelped in pain.

"Stop it!" Sabo complained, finally annoyed by his brothers' antics. "We're almost at the gate. We need to do things hastily."

"What does hastily means?" Luffy asked, looking downwards.

"It means, we need to be discreet." Sabo answered.

"What does—"

"It means, you need to shut up and let me handle it, Luffy." Ace answered with a scowl.

"That's not what it means but yeah..." Sabo snickered. "Close enough."

Luffy finally shut his mouth, not wanting to anger his brothers. The three brothers were on their usual attire of being stack up together to get through the town. Sabo in the bottom, Luffy in the middle, and Ace on the top.

They got on inside the town with ease. They went in the nearby back of a building away from the guard's eyes. They finally removed the coat. Luffy jumped from Sabo's shoulders. He raised his hand and stretched his back.

"Can we dine and dash?" Luffy suggested, excitedly.

Sabo gave him an apologetic smile. "Not now, Lu. Everyone still remembers our faces last time."

"Aww..." He pouted but did not say anything more.

The only reason why they were here was to find a buyer for the bear fur they got. If they were not busy fighting thugs or training, they can be merchants sometimes. The fur can easily be bid for a high price. They can then add the money to their pirate stash. Not a lot of people go to the Middle Forest to start hunting down animals. The place was dangerous, enough to make older men back away. But the trio was not exactly the normal type.

They found someone who was willing to buy it. Sabo, being the responsible and smooth-spoken, was the one to do the talking. While Ace did the job of distracting Luffy by having him talk nonstop.

"Luffy, stop fidgeting." Ace ordered calmly as his brother kept walking back and forth.

Luffy stopped abruptly. "Sabo's taking too long. Can we go and get him now? "

"He's fine. He can handle—" Ace halted momentarily.

Luffy blinked, noticing his older brother's change in attitude. Ace was staring at the bar just around the corner. Laughter was heard inside. Their voice was mocking as they kept talking about someone.

"So it's been twelve years since the Pirate King died? Serves him right!" A man said as laughter soon followed.

Luffy watched as Ace's face turned slowly into a deep frown. He clenched his fist, trying not to do anything. His face was turning red as his eyes narrowed.

"Ace?" Luffy asked, holding his brother's hand.

Ace turned to Luffy automatically, breaking his staring at the bar. Luffy gave him a worried look. Luffy cannot understand why Ace seemed to be prone to anger these days. He thought that Ace already stopped that kind of emotion.

Because if Luffy hated one thing, it was seeing his older brothers mad.

Maybe, holding his brother's hand will make him feel better. Sabo always says that Ace was just lonely. That was why he kept lashing on everyone. But Luffy cannot understand it now. He and Sabo will never leave Ace. So why was he so mad now?

"Luffy," Ace touched both his shoulders as he stared at him intently. "Go and be with Sabo. Don't wait for me. I'll be back later."

Luffy shook his head. "No."

"Luffy..." Ace growled.

"I don't wanna leave you angry like this, Ace!" Luffy complained. "Don't be like that! Sabo said that brothers don't hide things from each other! Why are you like this!?"

Ace bit down his lips and released a heavy breath. "I promise you. I'll be fine. Go."

Luffy was about to reply but he saw the desperation in his gray eyes. Luffy knows that he should trust his brothers and respect their decisions but he has a bad feeling on this one. But still, he decided to let it go.

"Okay." Luffy nodded, quickly running away to find his other brother.

He bumped into different kinds of people on the way making everyone yell at him. But Luffy has bigger problems. He needed to find Sabo. Maybe if he cannot change Ace's mind, Sabo will since they always listen to Sabo.

Luffy came to an alley. He looked inside and saw the person he was searching for. Sabo was grinning ear to ear, feeling please for the money in his hands.

"The deals better than I expected." Sabo muttered, counting the beris.

"Sabo!" Luffy called out, panting.

"Lu? Where's Ace?" Sabo asked, quite startled by him.

"Ace is angry! I don't know why! I tried holding his hand to make him feel better but it didn't work! There are these people in a bar and they kept talking about—" Luffy ranted out.

"Woah, woah." Sabo raised his eyebrows. "Calm down, okay?"

But Luffy was not listening. "We need to get Ace!"

And Sabo was dragged away.

- - -

They arrived in the bar that Luffy was talking about. It was fairly small and was only made of wood. It had the smell of alcohol and cigars. Trash and garbages were lying outside making the place filthy.

Once Sabo peeked a look inside, the first thing he noticed was the four men laying on the floor. They were beaten as they bleed out from different parts of their body. Some probably had a concussion.

It only meant one thing. They had been late and Ace was already gone.

The breathing of Sabo was heavy. Luffy also was not doing any better. He stared at the scene with wide eyes that showed shock. Sabo was worried about how his younger brother will react. This was a new thing for him.

"Ace did it, didn't he?" Luffy questioned, voice quivering.

Sabo bit his tongue. He hated lying to his brothers the same way his blood family lied to him. That was why they had a rule to always tell the truth to each other. But right now, this was the first time Luffy had seen this side of Ace.

"Yes, he did." Sabo confirmed.

Sabo thought that once Ace finally met Roger, this behavior of his would stop. He never stopped Ace about it in the past. But now, he was more worried than ever. He thought Ace was making process about his father but it all came crashing down.

"Why?" Luffy asked again.

Sabo stared at Luffy, unsure of what to answer. His younger brother's eyes were glassy, patiently waiting for Sabo's answer. An obvious frown was in Luffy's face. He bit his lip tightly in an attempt to hide any sound that wanted to escape from his mouth.

But Sabo could not answer him. It was something Ace was supposed to explain, not him. It was not Sabo's business to explain why Ace hated himself and everything.

Sabo sighed and gave him a reassuring smile. "Come on, Ace is probably in the treehouse. Who knows maybe he's already cooking food."

"Meat?" Luffy's eyes glittered even just a little.

"Yes."

Sabo grabbed Luffy. They started walking away from the bar and towards the gate. They did not put their robe as one of them was missing. Once the guards were not looking anymore, they quickly sneaked back to the Gray Terminal. Sabo's eyes tried to look for Ace in the garbage heap but he found no sign.

Sabo held Luffy's hand because he knew it was something Luffy will never get tired of. It always gave him a warm feeling inside like a blanket newly wash. But something was not right. Luffy always held Sabo with his left hand. But the one on the right was not there.

- - -

Sabo knew that it was one of those bad days.

When they arrived back on the treehouse, Ace was not in there. They waited for him patiently. They distracted themselves in the meantime. Sabo read a book while Luffy kept on fidgeting. And when they noticed that it was getting late, they started worrying more.

"Why isn't Ace here?" Luffy asked inquired.

Sabo sighed. "He wants to be alone, Lu. Those people in the bar earlier... They said that Ace didn't deserve to live..."

"What?" Luffy shrieked, clenching his fists. "I'm gonna fight them! Why would anyone hate Ace!?"

"Because of his heritage." Sabo answered. "You see, people believed that the father of Ace is a monster so they thought Ace is a monster, too."

"That's why Ace beat those guys? Because he believes them?" Luffy said, insightful of the situation.

Sabo nodded firmly.

"Ace is stupid." Luffy declared with a small puff.

"This is hard for him, Luffy..." Sabo said with a long sigh.

"Why does he believe those men anyway? People don't decide things for you. You decide it for yourself." Luffy grumbled, crossing his arms.

Sabo clicked his tongue. "It was something Ace has strongly believe although I don't. Try not to get mad at him."

"No," Luffy said defiantly. "That's why I'm gonna change that!"

He stared at Luffy, not surprised at that point. Their younger brother had already change Ace more than they had anticipated. Sabo has been with Ace for five years. He knew that the change happen when Luffy came crashing in their lives. Even though Ace always scolded their younger brother, he still loves Luffy and was willing to change himself just to be a better brother.

Sabo laughed and patted his younger brother's head. Luffy can be insightful sometimes. It was something Sabo was grateful for.

"Let's go find, Ace? You don't want him to be alone, right?" Sabo offered.

Luffy blinked before grinning. "Yes!"

- - -

The sea was a very beautiful place. He always wanted to travel the world and uncover every secret the sea has to offer. Being a pirate was what he always dreamed of. Just being free, away from a cage holding him back, and living his life to the fullest.

Whenever he was feeling down and just wanted some alone time for himself, Ace has one place to go to. A cliff that was the end of the forest. It was about more than a hundred meters from the coastline. Below, a lot of pointy rocks were in the area. One wrong move, you would fall over and die. But he was never stupid enough to do things like that.

The waves were heard below, crashing towards the rocks. The flat sea stretched in all directions, the afternoon sun scattering its rays across the horizon. Seagulls wheeled overhead, carried by the cool ocean breeze. In normal days, even just the sound of the waves was enough to calm Ace down. But today was not the day.

He was sitting on the edge of the cliff. He bowed his head and buried it in his legs. His black hair blew with the gentle sea breeze. His mind just kept repeating the men's voices earlier.

Ace entered the bar where the men were talking about how today was the Pirate King's execution years ago. Ace was never the one to care about those kinds of dates. But hearing it now, he hated it.

The four men talking were drunk. Ace hated the foul smell coming from their mouths. Both the words and the alcohol.

"What do you think of the Pirate King's son?" Ace asked making the drunk men turned their attention to him.

"Eh? A boy where did he come from?" A man asked, scoffing.

Another laughed. "C'mon, let's humor the kid here. You're asking about that man's brat? Why the hell a monster like that should exist?"

"He should be executed! Just like his old man!"

"Every person who Roger pissed off should torture him!"

"Yeah, that's right. And then he will beg for his life and say sorry for his shitty worthless life!"

Laughter erupted in the bar. Ace was used to this now. He allowed anger to control his body. He hardened his grip on his pipe. And soon enough, four bodies of men beaten by a ten-year-old kid, came falling to the floor.

Ace started pulling his hair in an attempt to suppress his emotions. But sadly, it never worked that way. There was a voice deep inside the boy that wanted to be heard. He wanted to scream and tell the whole world how much he hated them.

For Ace, physical pain is much tolerable than an emotional one. Physical pain can always be treated but an emotional one, it left you with a deep scaring in your mind. It was a constant battle with your self, neither wanting to give up. Because with that pain, you were alone and no one could ever help you.

Running. That was how he solved his every problem. But running would not be able to solve his problems now. Because no matter where he was or when it was, it will all came back crashing him. He could never escape his heritage. He was born with it. And he will die with it.

Because no matter how many times Ace asked that question to anyone, the answer will always be the same.

He does not deserve to live.

He was pathetic, stupid, good-for-nothing, miserable, degenerate, worthless, a demon—

"I hate seeing you like this, Ace."

Ace did not turn back. He did not want to see him. He never wanted to meet nor be related to him. He just wanted to pretend that he was no one.

"You're the last person I want to see right now..." Ace let go of those words like poison, spitting, and hurting the man.

He heard Roger heaved a heavy sigh. "Tell me what is it, son?"

And so, Ace faced him. His face was emotionless. No anger, no resentment, no sadness. Because he was tired of his emotions taking over him.

"Was it ever good that I was born?"

- - -

A/N: Did I forgot to mention that Ace has existential issues? Too bad, people just don't get over it.

I also rewrite this chapter for like three times. This was my third attempt and yet I feel like it's not good enough but oh well.

Random Fact: Rouge carried Ace for 15 months after Roger's execution. Ace's birthday was on January 1st so Roger was executed sometime between late September and early October.

See you next update!