Family Interlude: Part I.
Sarah received a letter, one that she had been looking forward to in the past few months. The writing was so very neat on the envelope, an envelope that she recognized was from Uhra with its textured feel. "To Sarah S., Tosca," she read aloud to herself. She smiled. Kaim was so very methodical in his writing, while Sarah's letters were never the same. Sometimes she'd send letters with practiced calligraphy that waved and weaved throughout the paper, but most of the time it was scratched out like she didn't have enough time to say all that she needed to say. Those were the long letters. Letters she hoped Kaim would be able to decipher.
Sarah,
The mission is over, and I am on my way home. It'll take three weeks so there is no need to write back. I think I am ready for a long rest.
Kaim
Three sentences, but that's all she needed.
. . .
"Kaim!"
He smiled when he finally was able to get the door opened. The journey back to Tosca was a long one, and with the mission he had on top of it, it would seem that the little home they shared had gone back into its cluttered mess. "I'm sorry," she said, stopping in her tracks after seeing his puzzled face. He could see a little guilt in her eyes, but it was gone just as fast as it came. By now he should know what happens when he's away for too long. Their little house didn't stand a chance.
He quickly wiped the expression off and replaced it with a smile. He met his wife in the middle of what he remembered to be their living room and wrapped her in a tight hug. All of the weariness from the long five years away seemed to melt away from him. Sarah was the familiarity he'd been dreaming about.
"You know we could just build another house," he commented when they finally pulled away from each other.
Sarah chewed on her lip. Despite the nine hundred years of life they had lived, and the past century and half they have been together, she was very hesitant about change.
. . .
Somehow he convinced her to build a mansion.
"Why would we need so much room?" she had cried.
"With all of your books, we could use two mansions," he had answered.
"It's a waste of resources."
"It's not a waste if we use each space."
"Six bedrooms? Isn't that a little much?"
"One for us, maybe two for guests." He paused. "The rest for any more of us we might have."
Sarah froze, eyes looking at but not really taking in the blueprint in front of her. Had they actually talked about any more of them? The thought twisted her stomach into knots. Children wasn't on her list of things to accomplish in her never ending life. She had resolved some seven hundred years ago that she would never have any. There were too many reasons why, and she hadn't thought she would have to ever explain herself. She glanced up at Kaim, and her heart dropped to her stomach. They'd been married for twelve years now and never once did he mention children. With all of his experiences with family she assumed he wouldn't want any more. She tried to reach out of her mind to say something to soothe the blink of worry Kaim held in his eyes, but he was already onto the next subject. Smoothing the thought over. She blew a tiny sigh of relief as he said, "and here, your own study. One of many. This one is in the basement…"
. . .
One autumn they traveled to Numara. Kaim called their traveling a late honeymoon, since it was the first time they'd visit the magnificent city since they got married.
Ming, ever the graceful Queen and host, gave them access to one of her grandest rooms as a wedding gift. As Sarah tried to refuse the offer, Ming quietly shook her head, and held the bespectacled woman's hands. "You are my honored guests and very good friends, and I would not have it any other way. It is for your wondrous union." She gave the two of them a gentle smile. "Please, rest. I know it is not the kindest trip to get to Numara. We shall catch up in the morning."
Kaim clamped a hand over his wife's mouth, silencing her objections. This earned a little laugh from Ming, as Kaim bowed deep to the Immortal Queen. Sarah followed suit, finally accepting the room. "Thank you, Ming."
"It is no trouble, Kaim."
.
Sarah stared out at the darkening sky through the floor to ceiling window. The clear waves crashed onto the beach in a pleasant rhythm and she felt herself drift into its trance. The room was beautiful and held one of the best views of the ocean she had ever seen. After a nice quick shower, and an even quicker dinner, they had finally managed to relax enough in this new setting. She felt Kaim's presence before his arms snaked around her middle. She laughed as he tickled her sides with his fingers. It didn't stop there and soon she was breathless and leaning into him, feeling a little like jelly.
Kaim kissed her favorite sweet spot on her neck, hands wandering over her. He squeezed her hips a little, and Sarah couldn't stop the surprised gasp that escaped her lips. "A little grabby tonight?" she called out, teasing.
Kaim answered by kissing and then sucking that sweet spot, and Sarah had to practically jump away from him. He caught her mid jump and laughed when she gave him an exasperated look. She could feel her cheeks blossom in heat, and that fluttery feeling sweep through her body at his touch. She managed to squeak out, "You know we married fifteen years ago, and you're acting like we're still newlyweds! Ah, you probably left a mark!"
"Well," he said, and Sarah had to bite her lip. The deep vibrato in his voice was only helping him in this situation. He knew she loved the sound of his voice and used that to continue the torture. "Ming did give us this room as a wedding gift. Why don't we take advantage of it?"
"You're so bad." But Sarah didn't shoo away Kaim's grabby hands this time, relishing in the feeling. She gave him a chaste kiss on his lips, and quirked her head toward the bed. "But you do have a point."
.
After a lazy morning breakfast, and more laughs and gasps, Kaim and Sarah finally managed to leave the room. The Queen was held up by her duties until later that afternoon, so they had time to walk around the city.
In Numara there was always something new to look at. This was the least visited place for them both, so any time spent wandering was always a learning experience. Today, Sarah was looking at Numara's nature.
Kaim watched as Sarah gushed over the plants on the edge of the city. He smiled as she gently felt the silky petal between fingers. "Tenderflora is what they are called, according to the people. They grow everywhere in Numara."
She sat down into the grass, and sketched the flower into her notebook. Kaim watched as she made her notes, before reaching down to pluck a bloom. "They say these flowers can make anyone very happy." He twisted the stem lightly, letting the fragrant smell lift towards him.
Sarah looked up, shutting her book and hummed in agreement. Kaim tucked the tenderflora behind her ear, and watched as a smile flitted to her face. "I guess that it's true."
Kaim kissed Sarah's reddened cheek, chuckling at her embarrassment that she could never hide, and folded his hand into hers. They began their walk back towards the city. It was nearing noon and it was a good time to find something to eat. The market was busy, but they were able to find a little vendor selling different kinds of sandwiches. They chose their meal, paid the gentleman, and found a little bench to sit on.
Kaim and Sarah ate in comfortable silence. He liked the warm calmness of Numara, which was quite different than the magical haze of Uhra, or the dark cold of Gohtza. Here people chatted happily and everyone seemed to like each other. There were fewer homeless, and even those who maybe lived in the streets were taken care of. It was a nice change of pace for the two of them, and one they always soaked in for they didn't know when they would be able to come back.
Kaim found himself staring out in the groups of people moving around them and the city. People watching was something he found himself fond of. Mortals were always changing and surprising him in ways he didn't think were possible. He learned something new about them every time he sat down and did this.
Something he didn't expect was to learn something new about his wife on their little Honeymoon. He watched as a young child, a little boy, threw a ball towards another boy. Of course the boy missed his catch, and the ball rolled itself to Sarah's feet. She set her sandwich aside and picked up the runaway ball.
He watched as she handed it back down to the shy child, leaning down on her hunches to be at eye level. She was talking to him about the game they were playing, and the boy, after his initial shyness, was all too eager to give her all the details and rules. Kaim watched as Sarah took in the information with the utmost attention, nodding when appropriate. His sandwich forgotten as she laughed and played one round with the two boys before coming back to him.
He watched her expression, and learned that she had a little bit of a longing look to her eyes. This is what surprised him. Never had he seen her with that kind of look towards children before. Kaim rested a hand on her arm, and that seemed to jolt her back to reality. She laughed, and Kaim loved the breathlessness of it. "They have such an interesting game going on."
"Oh?"
Sarah nodded, face a little flushed. She picked up her sandwich again, but only took a few more nibbles before giving up. "Let's go back to the palace," she said, tugging on Kaim's arm. He agreed.
.
Sarah couldn't get it out of her mind. She and Kaim spoke little about having and raising children. The idea still brought on a frightful feeling, but now she couldn't draw away from it.
She weighed the pros and cons. A child would be a lot of responsibility and take a lot of money and care to raise. They could grow up to be a disaster, or they could grow up to be a savior. The child could be a terror. A child could be a joy. She could feel herself melt at the image of Kaim playing with them, hugging them, and reading them stories. Money wasn't an issue. Living for as long as they did and not spending more than what was necessary left the couple with a very large savings.
Her last thought was a what if. What if their child wasn't like them? Everlasting? Her brow furrowed. Their baby would grow into a child, then into a teenager, an adult, and then old age. In a short span of ninety or so years their child would leave the world, and how could she live with herself? Aren't mothers supposed to go before their children?
She twisted in the silken sheets. Opening her eyes she saw the blurry outline of Kaim. He looked so peaceful in sleep. She frowned. How did Kaim live through having loved ones that left before him? Some even tragically taken away from him? She sighed. She couldn't do it.
. . .
At the end of their visit to Numara, and after the boat ride back, they decided to take a long walk home.
Which got them into a little bit of trouble.
Sarah sighed looking at the ocean through metal bars. This was not pleasant compared to the grand room they had left just a week before. As they stepped off the boat and walked a familiar path north, they ran into some Uhran guards. Kaim a little restless from the boat ride, and the fact that one of the guards made a bit of a pass at Sarah, might have said some not pleasing words towards the offending guard. After more threats and a heated argument, Kaim was ready for a fight.
Sarah sighed, standing to the side. It had been a long time since she had seen Kaim's temper flair, though she couldn't exactly blame him. It was a long boat ride without any stops, and the company could have been better. She wasn't going to think about the food they ate, either. Instead, she concentrated on a sleeping spell aimed at the guards. A few seconds after she started her charm, she was suddenly grabbed roughly by the arm. The words officially died on her lips when she felt the cool steel bite the skin of her throat. Backup arrived for the guards, and they were not willing to negotiate. The soldier stood silently, the very edge of his blade cutting into her soft skin of her neck. "K-Kaim!" she called out.
Her husband whipped around, fight draining from him when he saw her. He set down his sword and slowly raised his arms. He didn't stop looking at Sarah as he said, "let her go."
"You're going to come with us."
And here they were. She was separated from Kaim by a solid brick wall, but they could still talk to each other through the barred windows that shown the outside. His cell was right next to hers. They couldn't even give the husband and wife the decency to be able to look at each other face to face. It was true torture. "Sarah, I'm sorry," she heard his voice floating in through the window.
"It's okay." She thought that was like the twentieth time he apologized this day. She leaned her head as far out of the bars as she could, but couldn't see much of the cell beside her. She did see his arm poking out, and wished she was close enough to hold it. To comfort him. "They're checking paperwork, going through our things and we'll be out before we know it." She tried to sound reassuring.
She heard Kaim sigh. She leaned her head against the window, listening to the waves. "At least there's a view, right?" No response. She looked at his arm through the window. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah." He didn't sound very convincing.
Sarah rolled her shoulders. "I could use a massage."
There wasn't a reply, and Sarah knew that being contained gave Kaim anxiety. He probably wasn't going to be talking much, so she made it her mission to fill in the empty void with whatever she could think of. "When we get out we'll have to go to city and get a massage. That sounds delightful." She sighed closing her eyes to the light breeze filtering through the open window. "Just a week ago this breeze would have been beautiful. Does your cell smell a little?" She heard a little huff. Kaim giving his quiet opinion. "I wish we had some tenderflora to spruce this place up a little. I'm going to miss Numara."
Sarah let the conversation fall a little. After a few minutes she cleared her throat. "Kaim?"
She waited a second, not knowing if he had fallen asleep or was tuning her out. His arm wasn't outside of the bars anymore, so he was possibly not even near enough to hear her. It was fine either way, she knew it was just meaningless chatter. No hurt feelings. "I keep thinking about the little game those boys were playing. How cute it was when the little one was explaining the rules." She yawned, starting to feel a little worn herself. Traveling and being locked into a cell took a lot out of her. She leaned her head down. "They're little cheeks…cute voices…" She mumbled out a few more things before she dozed off.
.
When Kaim finally saw his wife after two days of being so close but also so far, he wrapped her in the tightest hug he could muster. She melted into the embrace, and it took a guard to awkwardly clear his throat for them to finally separate. Kaim was sure to glare at him as they walked past.
He stretched. It was really nice to be out. He hadn't slept since they were taken in, but somehow Sarah looked worse for wear. Her shoulders looked stiff and she was walking a little hunched over. But his little wife was looking at him with worry in her dark eyes. "Are you okay? You're not hurt, are you?"
"I'm fine."
"It's just that I know you don't like prisons. I just want to make sure you're okay. Here I can cast a curing spell—"
Kaim stopped her with a kiss to the cheek. She pouted at the effective way it tongue tied her. "I'm fine. You look like you could collapse any moment. Let's just find the inn and rest."
.
Once Sarah got out of the bath, Kaim instructed her to lay on the bed face down. As soon as she did, he was straddling her hips and rubbing circles into her back. Sarah let her moans out into her pillow, though to Kaim they were just muffled noises. "What was that?"
"So nice." Sarah tilted her head so that her face wasn't smothering into the pillow. "It feels good."
"Good. I know it's not a professional one, but it'll have to do."
Kaim took his time going down. He could practically feel her melt into the soft mattress. When he was all done, he kissed her cheek. She rolled over to her side, and Kaim fell into place beside her.
He watched as she sighed contently. "So about the other morning."
"What other morning?" Sarah asked, eyes drooping.
"The first day we were in the cell, you were talking about those boys in Numara." Sarah made an agreeing hum. "You then said that they had cute cheeks and voices." She hummed again. "And continued with you wouldn't mind having a little one with cheeks like mine."
Sarah's eyes snapped open. Kaim watched as she sat right up. "What?"
Kaim raised an eyebrow. "What?"
"I did not say that."
"You did," he replied.
She seemed to tense up, going back through their conversation. Kaim was actually a little worried that she was going to forget to breathe, and rubbed little circles on her arm with a finger. That seemed to get her to come back to him. She took in a shaky breath. "Did I?"
Kaim nodded. She hid her face into a pillow. "Can I ask why you're against it?" He figured they never really talked about children, and that she tended to avoid the subject altogether. It definitely wasn't something that was a make or break in their marriage to him, but he was rather curious.
Sarah took a deep breath. "I-I just can't go through with it." Her shoulders hunched and she wrapped her arms around herself. Kaim sat up resting his hand on her back. She turned to him. He must have looked worried, because she turned away saying, "I'm so sorry."
"Hey." Kaim pushed a stray lock of hair away from her face. He thumbed away a tear that ran from her eye. She turned back to him with a sniffle. "I'm not asking for us to have any children."
Sarah peeked an eye out and stared at him for a moment. Kaim watched as she slowly lowered the pillow, tears misting the edges of her eyelids. When he laid a hand on her arm, thumb caressing so very softly, she let a few of the tears fall. Kaim pulled her into a hug. "I don't mean to cry really," she managed to say between intakes of breath.
"We don't have to talk about it."
.
Back at home, Sarah felt immediately relieved. She could safely say that she would not mind resting for a decade. As she put away her things from her travel bag, she couldn't help but to sneak a peek at her husband, currently doing the same as herself, putting clothes and travel things away.
They hadn't talked about children since she cried the other day. She knew that was the unspoken, weird energy she could feel between the two of them. She tried to ignore it, but late into the evening, after Kaim had drifted off to sleep, she was still restless about it. It didn't help that her husband had been eerily silent all day, and even that was weird to Sarah.
By two in the morning she still couldn't find rest, so instead she pulled herself out of bed. Some chamomile tea might do the trick, she thought to herself.
She set the kettle on their stove and lit the fire underneath. Within a half hour, she was on the window bench in her library looking out to the dark sky before her. The tea was warm and pleasant going down and just after she finished her last sip, the effects were starting to work.
She woke up to a gentle shake. "Sarah."
She was up with a start, pulling her own hair out of her mouth. She had fallen asleep leaning against the window. The sun wasn't really high just yet. In fact there was still some pink streaking the sky. "Whattimeisit?"
"Half past six." Kaim guided some of her hair away from her cheeks, a smile tugging onto his lips. "Looks like we both could have slept in some more."
Sarah hummed. "I probably didn't fall asleep till closer to four." She yawned.
Kaim took her hand and led her back to their room. He pulled the covers away for her first, and she tucked herself into their bed as Kaim made his way to the other side. Once he was settled he lay his hands on her hips and dragged her to him. Sarah let out a little laugh as he settled his chin on the top of her head. "Let's get a few more hours in."
"Hmmm." Sarah was already drifting away.
.
Kaim hadn't expected to find his wife away from the bed again just only a few hours after he woke up the first time. It was now nearing ten and he could smell something cooking downstairs. He stretched and made his way down to find Sarah finishing the last of a very large breakfast.
"I couldn't sleep very long," she informed him. She was drinking what he could only assume was a very large mug of coffee. He knew she was tired when she broke out coffee instead of tea. She usually complained about the taste as she drank it. He smiled when she took another sip of it and made a face. "Ugh, bitter. I was up by seven and decided we needed something to eat. Walked to Tosca, bought some nice vegetables and some eggs, and here we are!" She handed him an empty plate. Kaim watched as she bounced around putting finishing touches on everything. She was looking a little paler than usual, and the dark circles under her eyes weren't helping her at all, but she was at least attempting to smile.
He knew things were kind of awkward between them at the moment, but this time around he wasn't really sure how to alleviate the feeling. The subject in question bloomed into his thoughts once more. He had wives before that did not want children. That was fine. They would live out the days together in peace. This was very different in that his past wives had passed on before him. Sarah was going to live on with him for as long as their immortals lives would stretch. Could he see himself not having any more children for the next thousand years? He loved children. They brought joy to his never ending life. The dozens he has had in the last nine hundred years have all taught him to appreciate life to the fullest. Would it break his heart to never have another child?
He looked up at Sarah. Yes, it would break his heart a little, but it would break his spirit even more to ever force Sarah into something she wasn't fully comfortable with. He would never ask her about it again. The awkwardness between them would disappear, he just needed to let the topic go.
Apparently, Sarah wasn't ready for that.
As soon as she sat down with her plate of food, just as Kaim lifted a fork to his mouth, she asked, "How could you have children knowing they were going to die before you?"
Kaim let his hand holding the fork fall away from his mouth. She was being so very direct this morning. "Sarah, really, I'm sorry I brought it up the other day—"
"I need to know."
Kaim twirled his fork on his plate, letting the egg smear around. He let the moment between them stretch to see if Sarah would change the topic, but she was looking at him determinately. He sighed, "If you think it's something I take lightly, it's not." Sarah's expression did not change, and Kaim set his fork down. He rested his head in his hand and pushed the food away with his elbow. "I don't know."
"That's not an answer." Sarah crossed her arms. Kaim wasn't getting out of this one.
How could he explain this to her? He drummed his fingers on the table filling up the space with the sound, staring at anything but his wife's face. After a few quiet minutes he let out a sigh. "Way back when, almost eight hundred years ago, I didn't think it was possible for someone like me to have children."
Sarah fit her head between her hands. He continued. "My first wife did not want children. She took measures to make sure it never happened. I didn't care. I wasn't interested in that. My second wife, though, she wanted them right away." Kaim could feel himself reeling back, remembering that woman from long ago. Her blonde hair was in waves down her back and her smile when she finally became pregnant was dazzling. "It took two years but it finally happened. I was shocked. I had told her, even before we got married, that there was a possibility that I could not have children because I was immortal, and here we were getting ready for one.
"I was a nervous wreck. All I could think about was how I was going to outlive them. I was to watch my wife and child die, watch them both grow old and leave this world without me."
Kaim looked at Sarah. She was wrapped into this story, soaking in every word. It dawned on him that his last sentence spoke truth to her. This was why she avoided the subject. He chewed on his cheek a moment before continuing. "It got to the point where I was worrying her because I had grown so silent over the months. The more the baby grew in her, the quieter I became. I was unable to feel excitement from this happening. It gave me a lot of anxiety and sleepless nights."
He paused. "So what happened?" Sarah asked. Her eyes were wide, mouth set into a grim line. He could only assume that she was thinking the worst.
"Well. The boy, my son, was born." Kaim lifted his head up off his hand and couldn't help the tiny smile that came to his face. "And it changed everything."
Sara's head tilted. "But how?"
Kaim shrugged. "I don't know. Holding him for the first time, I instantly felt this connection develop. I didn't know I could fall so hard and so quickly to something so small and fragile. I had never felt that way before, never knew this kind of attachment could just exist. We come from a world where no one is really born. I'm fuzzy on the details of our old home, but I know we didn't have this. We didn't have this feeling of love. We couldn't make life back there. We couldn't make a new living being the way we can here."
Kaim looked down at his hands, as if he could feel his son squirming in that little towel he was wrapped in. But that was another life. Generations upon generations ago. He flexed his fingers and looked back up at Sarah. She was chewing on her lip. "You want to know how I can live with myself, knowing that I was going to outlive my children." Sarah's eyes lit up. She squirmed a little and Kaim knew he landed right on the dot. "And I'm going to tell you that it's not easy. I've seen it all, and nothing could compare to watching my son die before me. Nothing could prepare me for that heartache. But knowing that I made this life…and he did so many good things, Sarah!" Kaim couldn't help the smile that broke onto his face. "I watched as he built a village from the ground up. I helped him make that decision. I shared in his pain when we watched as his mother succumb to her sickness before her time. I watched as this little thing that wobbled as a toddler grew into to a loving father, and then a grandfather; and I knew it was because I helped in that decision to create him.
"If it wasn't for my wife wanting and finally asking for that gift, I wouldn't have ever known that I could love something more than…more than anything in my never-ending life. I wouldn't have known the joy he brought me. After holding that baby in my arms, there wasn't anything to go back to. I knew I was going to be ruined, and that nothing I could do would stop it from happening. And after watching him go before me, eventually that itch came back. I craved that feeling of being a father. Whenever the opportunity came up, whether naturally or adopting, I never shied away. I don't think I could ever do that."
He grabbed her hand suddenly, and it made Sarah jump a little bit. He knew he must have looked desperate by the way he was focusing on her so intently, and the way her eyes locked into his, but he needed to let her know something. It was so very important for her to know. "That's also why I cannot ask you to do that. To have a child. I will never ask you, Sarah. I will never make you to do something you are truly against. I could never have those feelings forced onto you. You can trust me on that. I won't ask you about it again."
Sarah looked taken back as she stumbled out a, "r-right." Kaim eased into a smile, hoping he looked a little less frantic, and let go of her hand after a gentle squeeze. After a moment, Sarah flashed him a small smile and a nod, and began to eat. He followed after.
. . .
Seth looked odd coming out of a house instead of a boat.
She looked even odder carrying that curved stomach around.
The blue haired pirate waved Sarah and Kaim over. Sarah marveled at how much the tanned woman glowed. She could outshine the sun. She gave a quick hug to her friend. "Look at you!"
"Didn't think it would ever happen myself," Seth said with a laugh. "Come on, come on in to my temporary humble abode!"
"Temporary?" Kaim offered.
"As soon as this little guy is old enough I'll be going back to the sea!" Seth said, leading the way to the tiny seaside cottage. "If you can believe it, I'm already going crazy from being on land."
"I think I can believe that! I don't think I've ever seen you off of a boat!" Sarah laughed at Seth's face. "And you're already done with this land life."
"And it hasn't even started!"
Seth opened the door. Her cottage was small, but very bright. The light yellow walls reminded Sarah of the sand outside. Little plants hung from the windows, and little seashells were embedded into the window sills. There was a man, tall and surly looking, washing the dishes. Sarah laughed at the little white apron he wore. "I don't think I expected you to be so domesticated, Solomon."
The man grunted, but gave the bespectacled lady a kind smile. Seth met Solomon fifteen years ago out on the sea. He was a pirate from an opposing side, but after a swordmatch—in which, of course, Seth won—he found himself charmed by the immortal pirate. It took another decade for Seth to finally agree to a date, and here they were now expecting their first child.
Seth stood on the tips of her toes and pushed a stray silvering hair away from his eyes. She gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before maneuvering her way to their little dining table. Kaim and Sarah followed, Solomon helping Seth ease into a seat. "I'm ready to be able to sit without help," she grumbled after.
They talked for a little bit as Seth's husband moseyed around the kitchen. When it was nearing late afternoon, Solomon made his way back to the kitchen. Kaim followed, continuing what conversation they had started. Seth got out of her seat and motioned to Sarah. "Solomon is the cook around here and it's going to be little bit before dinner is ready. How bout we go for a walk?"
Sarah agreed, helping Seth into her sandals, they waved the men goodbye with promises to be back before too late, and made their way to the beach.
They lived near a seaside village. It wasn't a very large one, which suited Seth just fine. She wanted to keep a lower profile and with it being such a small place, with little to hardly any ships coming through their docks, it was the perfect spot to have her child. She had told Sarah in a letter that she was nervous of her enemies finding out about her condition, so Solomon had scoped this place out personally.
Seth absentmindedly rubbed her belly as they walked along the shore. Sarah eyed her, questions bubbling up to the surface of her mind. It would be rude to inquire, she thought.
But her pirate friend knew her fellow immortal. "You have questions." Seth turned to her, pausing in the sand. "I know it. Spit it out, Sarah!"
She couldn't help the flabbergasted look on her face. The pirate laughed. "Am I really that easy to read?" She adjusted her glasses in embarrassment.
"How long have I known you now? A century? Oh, no! It's been two! In the letters you've written and the handfuls of times we have managed to meet face to face, you always have questions!"
Sarah laughed at that. "I guess that's true." She took a deep breathe, Seth laughing because that's usually how it began. Breathe in, breathe several questions out. "Are you in pain? Do you need us to stop? You are kind of wobbling a little and I'm sure Solomon would be grateful if I offered you a break. How are things with Solomon? Are you hoping for a girl or a boy? And—"
Seth held up one finger. Sarah shut her mouth. "I'm not made of glass. Two." Seth lifted another finger to join the first. "Things with Solomon are great. Three, I am really hoping for boy." She scrunched up her face. "I don't know what to do with girls. I'm not exactly a feminine woman, and what if I happened to have a girl who wanted to act like a princess? Not for me."
Sarah gave her blue-haired companion a gentle smile. "I'm sure you could figure it out. Captain Seth Balmore can do anything she can set her mind to."
"I never imagined it would be this, though," Seth said, setting a loving hand to the swell of her abdomen. She looked back up at Sarah, one eyebrow raised, looking expectantly at her friend. "You two have been married longer than we have!"
Sarah could hear the inquiring statement that could be said next. She let out a breath between her lips. "You know women have a choice on whether or not they would like to have children, thank-you-very-much!"
"I know!" Seth bumped Sarah's shoulder. "And will you?"
"No." Sarah looked away for a moment. The sea weaved in and out across the sand and she wanted to lose herself in the motion of it.
Seth hummed beside her. Sarah turned expecting to hear a lecture, but instead she got a shrug from Seth. "It is your choice and that's that! Let's make our way back home."
Sarah raised her brow. "That's that? No, but it's your duty to your husband to have his children?"
Seth waved a hand, a dismissive noise came out between lips. "I don't believe in that shit." And that's all she had to say about it.
.
"Can I ask you something?"
Sarah and Seth were lounging outside underneath an umbrella. Kaim and Solomon were off into the little seaside town to get groceries leaving the two women alone at the cottage. The conversation from two days ago still lingered on her mind and this was the first opportunity Sarah had to ask another burning question.
"Sure." Seth set down her cup of water, waiting.
Sarah took another deep breath, steeling her mind to ask the question. Seth laughed, but was only a little surprised when Sarah only asked one. "Why?"
The pregnant woman blinked. "Why…?"
"Why have a baby at all?" Sarah couldn't get the right words out, but it was a good place to start.
Seth shrugged, making a noncommittal sound in the back of her throat. "Why not?" Sarah twisted her mouth a little. It made Seth chuckle. "What's it to you anyway?"
"I don't know." Sarah shook her head. "Never mind me asking."
"Nope! This isn't over." Sarah jumped when Seth raised her voice a little. The pirate laughed. "That didn't stop your curiosity! I can smell it coming off of you! You reek of festering questions, Sisulart!"
Sarah rolled her eyes at the vulgar image, and then sighed. "It's just." How could she put it nicely? "How can you go through with it? Knowing…"
"That I will outlive this baby?" Sarah nodded shyly. Seth shrugged again. Sarah for a moment thought that was going to be it. Just a shrug. She opened her mouth to give an exasperated response, but Seth held up one finger. "One reason, and that's it. Solomon asked."
Sarah waited for her to continue but after a moment, Seth pulled her finger away and drank the rest of her ice water. "That's it?"
"That's it."
"He asked." Sarah's brow creased.
"He did." Seth looked at the other immortal woman, scrubbing one hand through her short hair. "It was a simple choice really."
"I don't think it's that simple." Sarah chewed her lip. This was not the way she envisioned this conversation going.
"I guess I could explain." Seth laughed at the look Sarah threw at her. "What?"
"You are maddening!" Seth laughed again, and Sarah sighed. "I would love to hear your explanation."
"Well. Solomon is forty-seven years old. Did you know that?" Sarah waved her hand a little. She had guesstimated as much. "He's been on the sea more than half of his life. When we started dating all those years ago, he hinted at wanting to have a child. I wasn't for it at the time. He never mentioned it again until three days after we got married. You see, he explained it like this." She cleared her throat and gave her best impersonation of Solomon's deep graveling voice. "I ain't gettin' any younger, and it would make me tha 'appiest if you're willin'."
Sarah laughed but it ended with a few blinks. She tried to process an answer from that response, but it wasn't getting her anywhere. Seth gave her a lopsided grin. "I knew he would never ask me again if I really said no, but I said okay, and here we are almost a year later."
Sarah exhaled. "How was that such an easy decision? I mean. You will have to see…"Sarah didn't want to finish the sentence.
So, Seth finished it for her. "I will see the baby born, grow up, live life to the fullest, and pass on." Sarah looked up at her a little astonished. "What else is there to think about?"
"It can't be easy." Sarah said more to herself.
"No. I reckon it won't be." Seth sat up a little straighter. "It's okay that you don't want any, it doesn't matter to me any way about how you and Kaim live your lives. You're both immortals and will see each other till the end of times, but how can I deny my husband a request he's been waiting his whole, very short, mortal life for?"
Sarah drooped her head. She never really thought of it that way. "That's also why I cannot ask you to do that. To have a child." Kaim never asked as promised, but she wasn't blind. She remembers every time he is around children, the looks he gives and the kindness in his eyes these past forty years.
Seth continued. "He's already through most of his mortal life. I'm going to make the rest of it very special, and it brings me happiness to see him happy."
"I never…"
"Don't take it the wrong way. I hate it. I hate this." Seth motioned at her stomach. Sarah lifted her head back up, blinking at Seth. "The constant cramps, swelling, moving makes me hot, not being able to be on my ship. I miss Aneira but can only hope he isn't destroying my men! It's exhausting!" Seth whined. Sarah laughed a little. "But in two short months, I'll have my body back and something special with it."
"All because Solomon asked?"
"All because Solomon asked."
. . .
Kaim was away from Tosca for the first time in almost two decades. His friend and King of Gohtza needed some help with a new gang that sprang up in his large city, and he couldn't just leave the young king hanging. He offered Sarah to come along, but she declined, wanting to catch up on her book writing. They had been traveling most of the twenty years between his last mercenary job, so he understood. He couldn't help but to feel like she was hiding something though. He tucked the thought away for another day. He had to meet the king, and would be home soon enough to ask her in person anyway.
"Kaim you've helped me out immensely." The king sighed when the two of them were alone. Kaim noticed that the once young man was aging, silver starting to grow into the russet of his hair. When they had met almost twenty years before, just as he and Sarah were starting their adventure across Gohtza, he was young and naïve thinking he could do anything. Kaim saw that with age had come wisdom and the king knew when he needed some help. "I can't thank you enough."
"It is not a problem, your Majesty." He ended it with a bow.
"Ah, don't treat me that way, Kaim."
Kaim smiled. "Old habits."
"Always the formal one." The king laughed. Sitting at his desk in his large study. He motioned for his old friend to sit. "I feel like I can finally relax. How is Sarah, by the way?"
"Good." Kaim sat down across from the king. His thoughts traced back to her weird behavior before he left a few weeks ago. "She's being a little…odd."
"Well, isn't she always?"
Kaim gave a small nod, smiling a little. "Yes. That much is true."
"Oh!" The king pulled open a drawer. "Speaking of your wife, you received a letter from her a few days ago. You've been out and about, and I hadn't the chance to give it to you."
Kaim took the letter from the king and smoothed his thumb over it.
To Kaim Argonar, Gohtza ATTN: Gohtzan Palace
"I'm sorry the seal is broken. You know policy. Anything that comes through to the palace must be read," the king lifted his hands. "I promise I didn't read it though."
"It's a heavy letter." Kaim tucked it away from sight. "It's probably all chicken-scratch anyway. You wouldn't be able to get through it." He smiled at his imagining of Sarah's pouting face if she had heard that comment. He missed her, and ached to be home.
The king laughed. With a smile, Kaim got onto his feet. "I leave early tomorrow."
"Don't be a stranger, Kaim. Come visit. And bring that lovely wife of yours too!"
Kaim nodded, bowed low despite the king's protest of it, and let himself out into the hall. He acknowledged the two guards with a dip of his head, and left to his own guest bedroom.
It was now late into the evening, and even though he would love to leave now it wouldn't be the best idea to cross the snow this late at night. So Kaim stretched out onto the bed provided to him, shoes and shirt off, and pulled Sarah's letter from his jacket that lay on the chair next to him.
It was a heavy letter and he was surprised at how neatly her lines scripted across the pages. Usually when she wrote a lot there were a lot of mistakes and crossed off words or sentences. It was like listening to her speak when she was excited about a new discovery. All of the words would come pushing out of her lips at once. This time though he could see that she clearly had something to say, and that maybe this wasn't the first draft of her letter. He let his eyes wander over the words, smiling here and frowning there.
By the time he reached the end of it, though, he was sat straight up in bed. He read the last sentence over and over again, heart beating fast.
Instead of laying back down, he was pulling on his boots and finding his pack. He jotted a quick note of apology to the king for his quick exit, leaving it with a guard, and made his way out of the palace.
His trip home was disastrous and freezing, and he had to stay in Saman for a day to warm his weary bones back up before making his climb up to Tosca, but he finally threw open the door to his and Sarah's room. Sarah threw her hands up in alarm for only a moment before relaxing. Kaim made his way to her, asking, "Is it true?"
Sarah nodded. Kaim wrapped her in the coldest hug he had ever given, burying his cold nose into the crook of her neck. Sarah's laughter ringing and warming up the room.
. . .
Kaim,
I have missed you these last few weeks! It's been, what, two decades since we've been apart and I forgot how lonely this house gets with you not in it.
I've been attempting to keep myself busy to keep my mind off of things. I can't help but to go back to what happened a few months ago at the Tower of Mirrors. What could Gongora be up to? He was so crazed with power, promising such destructive things. I just…it's hard for me to let it go. I know I must. When we need to cross that river it will be crossed, but I just have this nagging feeling in my chest that something big is just around the corner.
Anyway. Tosca is great! Nothing too exciting happening. The weather is finally starting to let up! These winter months are always the worst and I miss having your body heat to place my poor cold fingers and toes on. I know you hate it, but you love me and deal with it anyway! I've had to cut some extra wood, but not too much. Luckily.
Little Tatum came by yesterday. He was all bundled up for traveling through the snow, but was so excited to finally come all the way here by himself! I worried a little for his safety, but he is twelve now and I guess he's not so little anymore. I gave him some herbs I had dried last fall. Looks like his mother has got a cold she can't shake. I offered to walk down with him, but he proudly refused! Tatum told me he couldn't ask a lady to walk him down only to walk home by herself after. He looked so funny waddling way down the path! It made me smile. I know he got home safely, and I do hope those herbs help soothe his mother's aches. Perhaps I'll go down to see them tomorrow if the weather permits.
No news on any fronts. The newspapers I receive from Tosca have no eerie reports in them. Maybe there will be peace? I don't know what to think of it. It's weird to see the world settle nicely. It's happened before, of course, but usually that means someone important will die, a new leader will come, and then there will be disagreement again. I'll keep watch on the papers, but you'll be back before I know it and we can just do that together.
No letters from Seth or Ming either. It makes me worry. Seth has been finally getting better after Solomon's sudden passing, and with Sed and Aneira around to help cheer her up she's maybe doing fine. It was nice to see her before Gongora made his little plan known, and now I'm afraid she's gone back to being quiet. I wrote to Ming before you left, and it saddens me just a little that I haven't heard anything back! I wonder what's going on in the world outside of Tosca, and usually they're the ones to keep me up to date. Maybe I just need to give them time.
I know I've been acting weird since before you left. The fact is that I haven't been feeling quite myself lately. Maybe it's all this magic and Gongora business, or that Tower of Mirrors incident. Maybe I just feel the pull to leave and go back home? Well. That and I do have something to tell you. I'm sorry it's in a letter. I didn't confirm it until after you left. And you know me, I can't bear to hold this information any longer than I need to, so please come home.
I'm pregnant.
Sarah.