Roxas let out a groan as the sunlight crept onto his face. Why hadn't he remembered to close the curtains on the window? Rolling over toward the wall, he felt the warmth of Axel beside him. Without thinking twice, he wrapped an arm around the redhead's waist and curled his body closer. There was still a chance to fall back asleep.
Even as he closed his eyes, the previous day rushed forward in his mind, destroying the comfortable fog of tiredness. Running into his father had caused an unsettling feeling to latch onto his chest and a multitude of uneasy thoughts to return to his head. He had hoped that after the past four years, he had been able to shove them deep into the back of his mind. But it had been so easily undone.
The feelings of being abandoned and unloved had struck him hard. He and Ventus had always believed that their father would have been there for them despite anything because of the powers passed down to them. But he had been so quick to turn them away, it had done nothing but leave a rift that separated him from being close to anyone.
Until Axel had came along, anyway. The friendship had started awkwardly, with Axel constantly following the blonde around and pestering him about how adorable he looked. A few months in and Roxas had somewhat grown used to the presence of the redhead and his wily antics. Around the eight month mark of being at the Academy, a ball had smacked him in the back of the head painfully during in outdoor event, leaving him a bit dazed as he laid on the ground and waited for the pain to slowly ebb away. Axel, who was never too far away back then, had run over to him. Apparently, whatever look Roxas had been wearing caused the redhead to smirk devilishly and utter a single sentence that was yet to leave Roxas' memory.
"Wouldn't mind seeing that face again, but maybe in a more private setting that includes a bed."
He still wasn't sure what reason he'd had when their relationship extended beyond a normal friendship. Only that he had found himself down the hall at Axel's door one night, only a couple of months after the outdoor incident. He had made the first move toward Axel, who had accepted it eagerly. From then on, it was a spiraling inferno of frequent lustful late nights. For Axel, it was nothing short of attraction and physical needs, whereas Roxas had enjoyed the sex as an outlet and a way to feel close to someone without the ties. Even after time had passed and they took on calling what they had a relationship, mostly from peer pressure, nothing had ultimately changed. It was just like their friends-with-benefits exchange.
Roxas still couldn't see himself as close with the dragon, but he enjoyed the company and the time they spent together. Though a lot of the emotions he went through were genuine, he still had to put on a façade at certain points to keep up the appearance and hide the fact that connecting with anyone only trudged up tragic memories best left buried. But something was slipping and he wasn't sure how to put it back where it needed to be.
"What's on your mind, blondie?" Axel's voice cut through his thoughts. He lifted his eyes to look at the sleepy faced redhead, hesitating before answering the question.
"Just thinking about some stuff. From when I first started at the Academy and whatnot." He felt Axel's fingers slide into his hair, gently massaging his head as he spoke. Roxas couldn't help but let out a slight moan from the relaxing gesture, earning a chuckle from beside him. "Was thinking about...us, too. Should really think...about our-ah!"
Roxas' words were cut off when fingers tugged at his hair slightly. He felt the bed dip as Axel moved. The redhead had shifted him onto his back, immediately leaning in to steal a kiss. Roxas had just barely turned his head in time to dodge the distraction, but the electrifying tingle along his neck from Axel's mouth sent a shiver down his spine and a dull shock straight to his libido.
"Axel. I'm trying to have a serious conversation with you. Please, stop," begged Roxas as he tried to push the redhead off of him. But the dragon was persistent in his attack, blazing a trail along the blonde's collarbone with teeth and tongue as he hummed in response. He only paused temporarily with a short verbal response, giving the burning ache growing in Roxas a short reprieve.
"Yeah, yeah. I hear you. Keep talking."
Roxas tried again at pushing him off, letting out a hushed cry when a sharp pain came from his shoulder. Axel had bit him a little harder than necessary in an attempt to distract him, but it only made the dream walker shift in his spot on the bed and shove harder. The redhead sighed and lifted himself up, but only enough to get a good view of the half naked boy beneath him.
Roxas' shirt was missing somewhere in the room from being flung in exhaustion the night before. It left his torso wide open for Axel to admire the tanned skin and lightly toned muscle, which was still a mystery to the redhead since he never once saw the boy attempt to maintain his physique. His emerald eyes lingered on his waist. The distressed black jeans that hugged his lithe frame was held by a belt, which was half undone, with silver x's and o's adorning the dark brown leather.
"Roxy, you really gotta stop undressing like this. Makes it hard for a man to keep his hands off. Can only imagine how you fight everyone away," mused Axel after appreciating the view.
"Because I don't make it a habit of dressing like this around people, you moron," growled Roxas, shooting a glare at his boyfriend.
"Luuucky me." As soon as the redhead looked over the mussed hair and hazy blue eyes, the smaller boy lifted a hand sharply in front of his face, clearly reading the intentions behind the bright green eyes.
"One day, I won't be here, Axel."
"We've talked about this before. Life happens. Let's just enjoy what we have," he replied, trying to deflect the coming conversation. It was one that always ended with an argument, something he wanted to avoid at all costs while they were finally away from the Academy.
"Why can't you ever take me seriously when I clearly state that I'm trying to have a serious conversation?"
"How many times are you going to say serious...?" Axel muttered under his breath while the blonde went on. He admitted defeat, rolling away from Roxas and propping his back against the wall as he sat up.
"Do you understand that I have a million things going through my head every day of my life? But I don't show people that. I act like everything is great and I'm enjoying the life I have. Especially when I'm around you." Roxas had sat up, turning toward Axel and noting the disinterested look on his face. "I'm not like you, or Sora or Riku. I'll die before you."
Axel snapped his attention toward the blonde, anger apparent and burning his eyes. Usually the topic contained something along the lines of Roxas suggesting that he didn't rely on him for happiness, or even count on their relationship being something long term. But this was new to the dragon. Death was never something that was brought up.
"Don't talk like that. Why are you even bringing it up?"
"Because I'm human. Ventus is human. We don't have time on our side. If the Headmaster can't find a solution for the future, people are going to die. Those of us who are human, we don't have a fighting chance. We're just a liability at this rate," Roxas countered. He moved, swinging his legs over the side of the bed to stand. "Just choose someone else that can actually live a long time. I'm not going to be here forever."
The blankets rustled as Axel moved quickly to the edge of the bed and grabbed Roxas' arm, forcing him around. The dream walker avoided his eyes, though, keeping them trained on the pillow to his left. It was similar to seeing people's dreams. They gave him insight to what their mind was like, and he had seen his fair share in life already. He was nearly an open book any time he would look into the bright green eyes of the dragon. Roxas felt he could see straight to into his soul, just like the phrase suggested.
"Enough is enough, Roxas. It's been three years, and for the past two, you've been doing the same song and dance. It isn't working-"
"Then I'll do it for you. I'm leaving, it's over. Go find yourself some pretty girl or guy that will last more than eighty years."
It was then Axel chose to lift his hand and, lightly grasping the nape of Roxas' neck, pulled the blonde down to capture his mouth in a kiss. He felt the muscles tense beneath his fingers, knowing he caught the boy off guard while he was attempting to be resolute in his decision. Taking advantage of the surprise, the dragon reached out and tugged him forward sharply.
The action forced Roxas to lose balance as his knees hit the bed. Instinctively, his hands flew out over Axel's shoulders to catch himself on the bed. He shifted his weight as he attempted to escape, but he knew once he felt Axel lift his feet onto the bed, his escape route had been blocked. The blonde was trapped into a sitting position on the dragon's stomach, hands still splayed against the bed with strands of the reddened hair feathering against his skin. But the hand on his neck had loosened and allowed him to pull away from the kiss, a movement that made Roxas realize his vision had became blurred. The pair locked eyes with each other. The exact thing that Roxas hadn't wanted to do, and what Axel was aiming for.
"You don't even believe your own words. How do you expect me to?" Roxas closed his eyes tightly at the truth he spoke. With his thumb, Axel traced the path of the tear that finally escaped down the boy's face, lingering at the corner of his mouth. "It's okay to be scared. But I'm not going anywhere, blondie. You've been stuck with me the second you knocked on my door."
When Axel reached up and pulled Roxas back into a kiss, the blonde didn't fight it. Instead, he reciprocated it fervently as he led the redhead's hand down to join the other at his waist. Taking the cue to lead, Axel had squeezed at the blonde's hips before he found himself flipped onto his back once more.
A shaky breath escaped his mouth, between the tight ball of emotions in his chest and slowly burning tension building in his body. With every light nip and slow swirl of Axel's tongue, Roxas began to notice that the redhead was taking his time. But it wasn't any less effective. Even at the feather-light movement of fingertips across his skin was nerve-wracking to his heightened senses. His member was already hard and throbbing beneath his jeans - there was no possible way he could be more turned on.
The blonde watched as he felt Axel's fingers work at his pants, pulling them off and tossing them to the floor carelessly. Within minutes, everything would temporarily go back to normal, the distraction from reality with the pretense of their physical closeness. Producing a travel sized bottle from his back pocket, the redhead squeezed some of the lube onto his fingers before snapping it shut and letting it follow the clothes to the floor. Hovering over Roxas on one elbow, he leaned down to capture his mouth in a kiss. At the same time, he reached down between them until his fingers reached the entrance he was seeking. Roxas, as always, felt his body tense at the pressure. As Axel slipped a finger inside slowly, his mouth opened in a gasp.
Their tongues met as the kiss deepened, pulling Roxas' mind away from the second finger being eased inside. As the third finger joined, he couldn't help but moan into the kiss. At this, Axel pumped his fingers a couple of more times before moving back and quickly pulling off his own clothes. He hooked an arm underneath one of the blonde's legs, fingers at his hip for stability. Roxas expected a quick hard fuck, per usual, but he was still drawing out every second as he eased inside. It was already driving Roxas crazy.
He let out a short rush of breath, opening his mouth to urge Axel to move faster, but as he did he felt an electrical shock to his system as a thumb pressed down on the pressure point in his hip. Involuntarily, his hips lifted, giving the redhead perfect access to thrust forward completely and hit the bundle of nerves waiting. Roxas flung his hands around the man as he cried out, bracing himself for the rush once again. Again, it didn't.
Axel set a slow steady pace, his thumb hovering over the sweet pressure point to spur Roxas when he needed. The blonde wanted fast, reckless sex. But this time, he was going to experience the slow burn that Axel had been living for the past two years. Every time he had been pushed away by Roxas, he felt himself inexplicably be pulled back with an even greater force
"Axel...go f-faster. " Axel shook his head in response.
"I want you to feel this."
He paused a moment, pulling out completely as he motioned for Roxas to turn around. Once on his hands and knees, he felt the dragon grab his hips, this time thrusting inside hard and deep. He bit out a curse as he braced a hand on the wall. The warmth breath on his ear as Axel leaned forward sent a shiver down his back.
"I want you to memorize exactly how it feels." Axel placed his hand next to the blonde's on the wall, nibbling at his earlobe as he moved started moving his hips in a faster pace than before. Roxas found himself pushing back against Axel, finding the same rhythm. "Exactly how I feel, inside of you."
Every time their hips met, his moans got louder and that same electrical shock to his system sensitized him further. His nerves went into overdrive when the felt the scrape of Axel's teeth on the curve of his shoulder, near the nape of his neck. As his mouth paid special attention to that one spot, Roxas' mind was pulled toward the feeling on his member. The redhead moved a thumb over the head, working the pre-cum as a lube over his fingers as he worked his way up and down the length and spending an extra amount of attention at the frenulum.
Roxas tried to muster words out of his mouth. Instead, a breathy, drawn out groan had forced its way out of his throat. The blonde curled his fingers, one into the covers of the bed and the other around Axel's hand as he reached his climax at the same time Axel did. He swore his vision had turned white as the release wracked his body. That had never happened before.
As he tried to steady his hard breathing, Roxas followed the redhead's hand, twisting in his position just in time to see him lick the cum from his fingers with a sly smirk on his face. With cheeks burning, nearly as much as the spot on the curve of his shoulder, he moved his sight toward the wall in front of him where he was still gripping the hand under his.
"Let's get you cleaned up. We should probably go see what the others are doing."
Just his husky voice alone sent another ache through his body, but instead of heading south, it settled within his chest. This hadn't been their usual sexcapade with reckless abandon and wanton needs. This had been something more. Roxas attempted to push the thoughts aside as they separated and headed to the bathroom, but the emotions he had felt clung to him. Even as Axel took care of his washing and gave a gentle scalp massage, his mind clung to that single moment. Luckily for him, being under the pouring water hid his tears well enough. Despite all of his fighting, he knew what it was that he was feeling. He just wasn't ready to admit it yet.
Ventus barely noticed as his brother and Axel came down the stairs, but he did watch as their eyes took in the three of them. Riku was alert, wolfing down his breakfast without a second thought. But Sora and Ventus were slumped over the table, looking like they were on the verge of death. He watched as Roxas pointed a look at the shifter with a raised eyebrow. He only shrugged in response while he finished his mouthful of food.
"Apparently neither of them got enough sleep last night," Riku filled in. Ven didn't look away as the younger twin looked at him, seeing the hint of worry in his eyes.
"Don't worry. It wasn't about Dad," he muttered, moving the scrambled eggs around with a fork. "I just-"
He cut off his sentence as he received a pointed look from Sora across the table. Although they had been up late, he had received a visit from the brunette earlier in the morning. Before he could bring anything up, however, Riku had awoken and joined them in the hall. Ven was smart enough to know what Sora had been wanting to talk about. He had already pieced it together the night before. If Vanitas could mention things he hadn't physically been present for, he could only assume the two shared parts of their memories. But from what the demon had mentioned, the vampire could cut him off from certain ones. Which meant a high possibility that Vanitas didn't know about the vision Namine had shared with them.
"I just couldn't get comfortable, Roxas. I'm sure tonight will be better." Ventus pushed his plate away as he stood. "I'm going into town for some fresh air. I'll be back in a little while."
"I'm going to. You can show me around the town," Sora said quickly, abruptly perking up and leaving the table as well. They both heard Riku as he tried to choke down his food.
"No, hell no. I'm not staying here with these two. They can start having sex at any moment," he growled.
"Nah, we already got that out of the way. You're safe, wolf," Axel shot back smugly, flashing him a toothy grin. Ventus and Sora waved at hand at the red-faced shifter as they disappeared from the dining room and exited the house.
An awkward silence filled the air as they made their way through the forest. Ventus had the urge several times to bring up a topic, but each time, his words failed him. It wasn't until they neared the end of the trail that Sora stopped and looked toward the older twin.
"You should have left when you realized it wasn't me. He isn't necessarily safe to be around, Ven."
"Then why do you even let him have control?" he questioned, shoving his hands into his pockets. Sora hesitated in his response, turning away slightly as he looked like he was searching for the best possible answer. "From the looks of it, he's going to destroy the Academy and everyone inside of it. And you're choosing to let him roam around freely and masquerade as you."
"Because he's the reason I'm even still here," the brunette said quietly. He didn't look toward Ventus, but kept his eyes trained on the dirt path. "I was changed when I was ten. I wasn't born this way. Vampires killed my family, tore them apart. I was dying. But before I did, Vanitas was there. He offered me salvation, a chance to keep living, so I accepted it. What else was I supposed to do? I was a kid and I didn't want to die yet."
Ventus stayed quiet, even when Sora paused in his explanation. It was obvious that he struggled telling the story, even if it was a simple one. The only thing that made it difficult was admitting that he had made a deal with a demon. The question was, what was the cost of that deal?
"Shortly after I let him in, a vampire had found me and decided to change me. Possibly one of the same ones that killed my human parents. Vanitas made it possible for the blood exchange to even work, since he kept me alive longer than I should have been. Once someone, or something, is already dead, there's no way to reanimate it with a conscious. I've wondered since then, maybe I should have just...let go."
"Sora..." Ventus took a step toward the brunette, but he stepped back, keeping the distance between them.
"After I woke up a vampire, I couldn't remember much of my human life. Or maybe the memories were suppressed. Vanitas helped me remember. All these years, and I forgot about hunting down the ones who killed my real parents. But he kept his end of the bargain, kept me alive and safe, even when I didn't realize it. I forgot that I was the one who let him in. All he wants is to see things again, to be real again. He looks like me because he's been a part of me for longer than I even remembered. I know he's a demon, but there's some part of him that wants to be human again, Ven. Who am I to keep that from him? Maybe it could change things. He just needs a chance, so I offered him one. With a stipulation that he keeps himself out of my business when I'm myself. But I still don't trust him."
"I get it. People like Roxas and I, we want things that you guys have. It's only logical that you would want something that humans have. It's the nature of people, always wanting what they don't have," replied Ven, chancing another step toward Sora. This time, he didn't move away. The blonde closed the distance, placing a hand on the brunette's shoulder lightly. "I won't tell anyone. In fact, it gives me an idea. I can use it to my advantage, get to know what he wants. If he's already planned on using this opportunity to do what Namine saw, he's bound to slip up a couple of details if he's comfortable enough. But he didn't seem know that we knew. So the question is, how did you keep it from him?"
A smile slipped onto Sora's face at the question. He moved from the blonde, continuing their walk as he exited the trees and through the archway into the Tram Common.
"Simple, really. Even you could do it. Just think of whatever memories you don't want to share and imagine locking it up in the most fail-safe sort of way."
The topic tapered off into more causal talk as they stopped for ice cream before wandering the town. Ventus pointed out a few key places of the town. The bistro was an obvious staple. If they had turned right when they entered the Tram Common, they would have found themselves at a public screening for short films. At the town square, or the Sandlot, was where they had been the previous day. Currently it was set up as a shopping plaza for the season, but events and tournaments were normally held there in other parts of the year. The blonde lead Sora up the alleyway and to the Station Plaza where the trains ran. But it wasn't the trains he was going to show the brunette.
As they made their way up the stairwell inside and came out at the top of the clock tower, Ventus took a seat on the edge of the concrete ledge. Sora followed suite after a short internal debate with himself. Ventus watched the people in the streets below as they went about their day, as if nothing mattered other than the usual day-to-day activities they had grown accustomed to. So many were oblivious to the reality around them. For years, the Ven wondered how they even coexisted in the same world without knowing the truth of what lingered in the masses. It looked so easy.
"When I started noticing Mom acting weird, I would bring Roxas here for ice cream all the time. With Dad always making excuses for her behavior, it didn't feel safe. And he needed that feeling. Like everything could still be okay," he murmured. Drops of the chocolate ice cream he held fell to the ground several feet below as he lost himself in the horizon past the town. "I may have kept her from killing us, but I failed him at the same time. I destroyed any chance of normalcy when I put her in that coma."
"You did what you had to." Ventus turned his attention to Sora, who stared at him with a resolute look on his face.
"You sound like Vanitas when you say that," he pointed out, although the words the demon had spoken were in a different context. "How did you work out, uh... the timing? When he has control and when you do?"
"Well, he was the whole reason this trip was even planned. But he agreed not to be too greedy since you guys are along for the ride. He can sort of act like me, but I've come to realize it really just makes me seem like I really do have split personalities."
Ventus couldn't help but laugh at the statement.
"Everyone already has their speculations. From what Roxas said, Riku believes you're just having a memory relapse to when you were human. I suppose it isn't too far off the mark."
"I did sort of have a weird breakdown in the Headmaster's office. I filled Riku in that I wasn't born this way, and apparently he took it upon himself to share that information. What he didn't know was the part where I couldn't remember anything before my death. So, maybe it's assumption," said the brunette, almost as if he was pondering the shifter's train of thought aloud. "We'll just go with his theory. Probably for the better, anyway, if anything comes up."
"Hopefully, when it comes down to everything...we're just wrong. And what Namine saw, it could just be one version of many different possible futures."
"Let's hope."
