Hello all ~
I am really sorry this update took forever. I don't think I posted an explanation on ffnet either - to be honest, I forgot. I wrote an Author's Note on ao3, explaining that my beta and I had plans to dramatically rewrite this chapter. I wasn't planning on delaying the edits more than a week, but my sister fell sick and had to be hospitalised (it wasn't covid, don't worry!), and then right after she got better my dog fell sick.
After all that was done, It's not that things got worse for me materially, my sister is feeling much better as is my dog (thank you all for your well wishes!), but my mental health really tanked for a while afterwards. I don't know, the news cycle has been very hard, and the fascism in my country is really peaking at the moment. But even if it wasn't for all that, I just haven't been doing too well with the lockdown.
In any case, I hope I am on track after this, since there really aren't many chapters left and I have written everything. If something needs a drastic rewrite according to my fabulous beta junieyes, I will let you guys know well in advance! I hope you haven't forgotten me!
Also, I wanted to respond to reviewer "love your story": thank you so much! I'm so glad people from other countries and non white histories feel the same way I do, because I struggle with my placement a lot sometimes. Also yeah, Rowling has been the biggest disappointment of my childhood. She really should have done better with socio-cultural stuff, you know.
And thank you so much for liking my story so much! I hope you like this chapter as well :D
Charlie & the Chocolate Factory by Roald Dahl
Sirius' cousin's house was in a small locality in London. Even as they apparated on the front lawns, she could feel the difference between herself and Sirius' world. The row of houses – different, but with a similar neatness – made her very uneasy. The trimmed hedges, the mailboxes, all of the placidity that came with being comfortable. The wood on the porches didn't look worn, and one of the houses was sporting what looked like a fresh coat of paint. June became distinctly aware of the fact that she'd hidden a stain on her shirt by wearing her overalls.
Sirius held her hand and knocked on the door. They had a tidy garden, but it had some of those telltale bits of wildness that accompanied wizards: an old oak, a battered swing set, and the garden beds growing wild even if the grass was not. June shuffled her feet closer and waited.
"Dora!" a female voice shout from the other side of the door. "Put your toys away, for crying out loud."
The door swung open. Andromeda Tonks looked a little irritated, but not worse for wear. She was dark haired and dark eyed, and bore aristocratic features that June could easily recognise in Sirius.
Andromeda smiled brightly at them as soon as she opened the door, which was startling, as she had a face that seemed to constantly express displeasure, no matter how neutral she was feeling.
"Sirius!" she said. "Oh, good, you're both here. Ted and I were getting worried."
June blushed, "Hello, ma'am."
"You're June, aren't you?" asked Andromeda. "Why on earth would you call me ma'am? Sirius did you terrify her?"
"I would never," said Sirius, trying to feign innocence. Andromeda didn't look even partly convinced, but she stepped aside to let them in.
The hallway was small and narrow – on their right, the living room door was open, and a stairwell went upwards. Dora's toys were littered everywhere in the living room, some hanging off the railings of the stairwell. June blinked at the monkey that blinked back at her. Right. Magical child, magical toys. Disconcerting. She turned away from the monkey when it winked.
Andromeda was tall, and under the ceiling lights, June could see her more clearly her resemblance to Sirius became unmistakable. Her robes felt out of place in this suburbia, and it occurred to June that she didn't actually own any robes that weren't school robes. Andromeda's robes had some rich embroidery on the cuffs, which again made June feel like fixing her hair, but she suppressed the urge.
"Dora, listen to your mum," chuckled Sirius. "June got you something, and she'll give it to you if you clear up."
Dora – small, with strangely pink hair and a heart shaped face stood on the stairs and looked at June curiously. Her hair changed from pink to turquoise, and June schooled her expression away from surprise. "What did you get me?" Dora asked, her eyes wide.
"Um – I brought you chocolates," said June shyly, holding out the box.
Dora looked thrilled, immediately reaching for the box when her mother slapped Dora's hand away. "Clear your things up, Dora. Chocolates after lunch."
Dora's cheeks puffed up, her eyebrows drawing to a frown when June said, "You know, you could tell me about the monkey," she said. "He seems to have an interesting story."
"He's from Africa," said Dora, at once.
"Come on, let's get them upstairs?"
"You don't have to, June," said Andromeda, her hair swishing as she turned to June.
"I'd like to," said June. "I want to endear myself to her a little. Besides, I wasn't lying, I'd like to know more."
Andromeda looked amused, but very pleased as well. June took it as a good sign. "Sirius, Ted's waiting for you in his study –"
Christ almighty, thought June to herself. A study. She didn't know whether she was fully surprised, but it did take her aback. Sirius took the door on the left of the staircase and disappeared. June cleared up things with Dora, who chattered on and on about monkeys, told her rather a lot about the different species in India and some more about the way they used their tails. Dora's room was on upstairs, on the left, and June found out why she knew so much about monkeys: there were a few muggle books on monkeys, which she was guessing were from her father. She saw something called Tales of Beedle the Bard in her shelf, and was surprised – she didn't know wizards had children's books. There were a few more magical books, and then a Roald Dahl.
"You read Willy Wonka?" asked Dora, forgetting her monkeys.
"Uh – no, I'm sorry," said June. The lighting of the room slanted. All her crayon drawings were stuck up on a corkboard, and she'd noticed that Andromeda or her husband had animated a few. Dora's bed was green, and her walls were pink, which clashed terribly, but she had a feeling Dora jumped between colours a lot – since her hair were already shifting from turquoise to green.
"Mum read it to me. I know how to read some things," said Dora proudly, "But I can't read everything yet, Dad says. So Mum read it to me. It's about a chocolate factory. Mum says chocolate factories don't exist like this one, but Dad says it's possible."
"Well," said June, tapping her nose and pretending to think about it. "We are in the magical world. I don't see how it's not possible. I would have to read the book to tell you more, though."
Dora thrust the book to June. "You read it. You have to bring it back, because it's mine, and you have to tell me what you think about the chocolate factory. And you have to send more chocolate."
June was touched, and she was ready to say so, but a call came from downstairs, instantly distracting them. "Dora! Help me set up!"
June flinched as she watched Dora scramble downstairs. Four year olds had too much energy. She carefully put the book in her bag. That was definitely her Dad's choice.
It felt strange to straddle childhoods. Maybe June would have been better off with a Beedle Bard book in Hogwarts, but Dora had chocolate factories to contend with as well.
She left the room, trying not to snoop. She found Sirius staring at some of the photos dotting the wall of the stairwell.
She stepped slowly towards him. He glanced at her as she reached a step above him, for once matching his height. "What did she tell you about the monkey?"
"A lot," said June shortly. "Which bit did you want to know?"
He smirked. "You didn't have to, you know?"
"I don't mind children," shrugged June. "I took care of a lot of my cousins from my father's side. I'm the eldest."
"It shows," he grinned. He was looking at her like butter was melting in her mouth, and she blushed brightly. "Would you like any?"
"Are you offering?" she challenged, raising her eyebrows.
"Goodness, no. Not during a war. I – I can't tell you how bizarre seeing this wall is," said Sirius. "I don't think my mother has a photograph of me that's not you know – a portrait."
"Rich boy," grinned June. "But I… know what you mean. I don't think my mother has any good pictures of me either. None that she'd hang up, anyway."
"God forbid we'd know we're loved, right?" asked Sirius, returning her grin.
June rolled her eyes, but she understood. She turned again to the photographs. She was looking at a picture of Andromeda and her husband during their wedding, but it was funny – there was practically no one else there – except what looked like one set of parents and an old man. "I don't think I'd want any, anyway," she said evenly. "I had my share of raising children. They're fine from a distance."
He chuckled. He looked at the photo she was examining. "Dromeda and Ted's wedding, you know."
"Looks a bit empty," said June neutrally.
"Yeah, they ran away right after Hogwarts," said Sirius. "Since I was still at home she didn't tell me, either. My mother's a piece of work – if she'd even caught wind of it, there would have been hell to pay. She punished me and Regulus anyway, but I didn't mind a few nights without dinner. Reg got away with fewer nights because he told Mother whatever he knew. I'd known about 'Dromeda's plans but like I was going to tell dear old Mummy."
June didn't say anything. Sirius seemed lost somewhere, because he continued without prompting: "'Dromeda felt terrible afterwards, of course, but she never knew how ridiculous Mother was. Her parents were evil, but in less obvious ways. It's why it took her longer to get out."
"They look happy," she said quietly. "The wedding, I mean."
Sirius shrugged. "Happier than any of my other cousins. Bellatrix gloated in her wedding dress, if I remember correctly. But she wasn't happy, if that's what you're asking. And of course, Dromeda was never invited for the wedding – I think Dromeda tried to stay in touch with her sisters – ah – look, she's got a photograph of Cissy up."
June looked at the photograph, and she felt the strangest sensation that she had seen the other girl in the photo before. Blonde haired and grey eyed as she was, she looked far away from everyone and everything Black. Her mouth had something steel about her that reminded her strongly of Andromeda, even though they really didn't look much alike. Out of the blue, the resemblance clicked.
"Narcissa Black?" asked June, surprised. And yes, Andromeda had her arm around a thirteen year old Narcissa Black, who looked prim but pleased. Narcissa was publicly dating Lucius Malfoy, a seventh year Slytherin that was, without debate, one of the nastiest bullies in the castle. And if rumours were to be believed, a Death Eater too. June's heart stopped. If Narcissa was one of his cousins, then by Bellatrix he probably meant Bellatrix Lestrange. She felt like her life had slowed to a halt. At the very least there were no photographs of Bellatrix Lestrange.
"She was a bit nicer back when she was little. Cold, always," said Sirius, lost in memories. Something about him seemed both far away and nearby. "But Cissy was smart. I don't doubt she believes the trash that they all do, but she also sees it more as a matter of convenience. For her, family is over everything else – she's loyal to her and hers. You won't understand – it's – it's the way Slytherins are. If it weren't for all the eugenics, they'd be the sort to die with you should it be necessary. Narcissa would lie to Lord Voldemort if it meant protecting her own."
June wouldn't know. Her interaction with Narcissa Black had been limited – she'd not seen much of her, and now she wondered if she should pay attention to how the Slytherins treated her now that she was dating Sirius. She glanced at him again, unsure of how to navigate the terrain that was Sirius' family.
"And the man in the wedding photograph?" asked June. "That's your uncle, right?"
"No one knows he was there," said Sirius. "I think I might be the only one. Even if they didn't disown him then, they must have now. He left me his inheritance."
June grimaced.
"A little horrific, isn't it?" he asked, bitter. "The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black."
"I guess I should have known," teased June. "You'd have to have a truly terrible back story for such an overdramatic personality."
He nudged her with his shoulder. "Careful, Williams," he said. "You're going to make me laugh while I recall my awful childhood."
"It would be very callous of you," she said. "How're you supposed to have emotional weight if you laugh when you discuss your mother starving you?"
He actually did laugh, then. "Your mum ever try that?"
"A few times," said June. "Not for many days in a row, though."
"In that case my sad story is worse than yours," he said triumphantly.
"I'm poor," June pointed out. "And a muggleborn."
He scowled. "Fine," he said.
They heard Dora shout excitedly from the other room.
Sirius had that look in his eyes again, and June blushed. "God – you look beautiful," he murmured, eyelashes fluttering. "And I don't know why you always smell amazing."
June pursed her lips, but she was pleased. He put one foot on the same step as her.
June didn't back away, but she felt it was necessary to put up some form of resistance. "They're in the other room," she said quietly.
"I risked your mother," he said. "You have to risk my cousin. The odds are in your favour. My cousin won't kill you."
June went even pinker. And he was closer to her too, so the temptation was much stronger. Already, the memory of his kiss felt far away – and she was tempted to memorise it again. "Christ almighty, why must you test me?" she said under her breath, and planted her lips on his.
Her feet never left her step, yet she leaned sharply into him. He braced her instantly, his arms winding around her, making sure she didn't topple off the stairs. If she wasn't already swept away and half in love with this ridiculous boy, it was very likely that this kiss would have been the final nail on the coffin. Her heart was beating at a speed she had never really felt, and she didn't know how to quantify all the things he made her think of. It was dangerous how much she liked him.
"I don't think you're supposed to use God's name in vain," he breathed into her lips.
"Call the Pope," she whispered back, and kissed him again. She'd become greedier, she'd noticed. Because Sirius gave her what she wanted she had learned how to ask.
Just as she felt his hand lower on the back, they heard a cough. Instantly, June jumped back. She nearly toppled, but Sirius held her hand.
The round, pleasant faced man who'd looked into the hallway was smiling. "Sirius, Andromeda is going to have a coronary if we don't eat soon. She wanted to know if you could help out. It was more of a demand, really."
Distantly, they heard something crash. "Sorry!" came the yell from Dora.
"We might have a few overenthusiastic helpers," said Ted, now grinning.
"Oh, Agrippa," muttered Sirius. "Give me a moment, Ted –"
Sirius hopped over the railing, giving June a heart attack. She rushed forward and leaned against the leaning, peering worriedly. "Do you need any –"
"No, don't worry!" he said, sprinting off.
There was silence as it was just June and Ted now in the stairwell. June felt her face becoming pinker and warmer, not helped by the pleasant, slightly knowing smile that Ted sported. It was starting to get a little bit awkward, June thought. "Um, I-"
"You don't have to explain it to me," said Ted amiably. "Why don't you come downstairs?"
June obeyed slowly, still very embarrassed, still very pink. "Did she tell you about Willy Wonka?" asked Ted once she reached him.
June nodded, her voice lost somewhere between being discovered kissing Sirius Black and being in his cousin's home while doing so. "That was my choice," he puffed, as they headed into the living room.
"Um," said June. The sofa was a little old and worn, and it had been bought second hand or been handed down from someone – and the fireplace was an old fashioned one, with a grate that was more ash than metal. This didn't surprise her, since she was sure the house was connected to the Floo. An antique clock with twelve hands and multiple planets travelling the edge was hung over the fireplace.
"Yeah, Dromeda doesn't understand Muggle literature. I'm not that much of a reader," he shrugged. "But I have to say we have much better reading on the muggle side of things."
She smiled, unsure. She wasn't sure where she stood with Sirius' family – these were reportedly the only he had left, apart from the Marauders – and at the very least the Marauders didn't have anything against her. But Andromeda and Ted weren't sixteen year old boys who could be wooed with homemade fudge. She was seriously unprepared – back home, the rules of courtship were simpler, since most everyone knew everyone else. It was hard to surprise anyone's parents when that was the case.
"Sirius told me you liked reading?" said Ted.
June swallowed. Ted was trying really hard, and she was being particularly monosyllabic. He sat on one of the armchairs, and motioned for her to sit as well.
"I do," said June, slowly settling down on the sofa. "A lot. That's how we met."
Ted nodded. "That's a good story. Andromeda and I were potions partners."
"Classic," said June, smothering a smile.
Ted grinned back. "He's not too bad, Sirius. 'Dromeda used to be a little concerned back when we first married, because it seemed he'd become something of a bully – but he's grown out of it."
Even though June had limited interaction with Andromeda, she found it absolutely insane that anything would have worried or concerned her. Ted must have noticed the expression on her face, because he laughed. "She isn't very used to showing concern, you've got that right. Nerves of steel and all that – all of them have that, the Blacks."
"I don't suppose they had much of an option," muttered June. She didn't know where the thought came from, but it seemed as natural as breathing. It wasn't that she hadn't known Sirius had a difficult home life – it was more that she had not known what it meant to leave.
"No," said Ted carefully. "I don't think they did. Sirius had a worse time than Andromeda, though. Andromeda's parents never used magic against her. Maybe she would have left if they had."
June hadn't left her home, her mother, her father. It wasn't that things hadn't been difficult for her – she just had nowhere to go should she leave, and as long as she wasn't being starved days on end, she didn't see any sense in tempting fate. Sirius had magic used against him…
"Is Andromeda -?" began June.
"Sometimes we have a letter from Narcissa, but that's stopped since she started seriously seeing Lucius Malfoy. I wouldn't be surprised if there was another wedding on the cards. It's a good, pureblood match. Nothing that will taint the family name, and she'll probably produce an heir in no time."
June contemplated this. The force of being with Sirius Black hit her in another way. She felt like laughing when she remembered how worried she'd been about his being popular. His popularity – everything else, that was set dressing compared to this. She was a muggleborn witch with no credentials, no proper family, no real money, dating a pureblood wizard from The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black. She'd always known the Blacks were a little insane, and everyone knew Sirius ran away from home, but for the first time she understood why. Her family was cruel to her, too – but this was… this was special.
June decided to look directly at Ted. He was regarding her with some care, too. It was that silent conversation muggleborns had between each other, something she had noticed happened between herself and Lily these days.
"How bad is it?" she asked, fairly.
"It'll be easier for you, since he's already run away," said Ted. "You're – you're very young, June, so you might not understand this – but you have to know what you are signing up for. Andromeda and I were followed once we got away, and if it wasn't for her uncle – well. Sirius was lucky to be with the Potters, I think they shielded him from some of the more dangerous threats to his person."
Ted didn't mince words, which was something she appreciated. June chewed her lip.
"They'd have married her off, you know," said Ted. "Andromeda, I mean. She's had to learn a lot of things when she came with me – that's why she's cooking today, it's sort of a test for her. She basically knew nothing when we got away. I had to convince her this life was worth it."
June could see that. The remainders of someone having lived in money were everywhere – the antique clock, the embroidered robes. A lot of it was terribly middle class for her, but the rest was stuff she had no reference for – what did it mean to leave your family? How bad did they have to be? Did Sirius have any remainders from the Black household, at all? Did he keep them as carefully as Andromeda clearly had? Or had he forgotten everything and rid himself of everything, believing it all to be tainted?
"Anything I should watch out for?" she asked lightly.
Ted laughed. "Good attitude. You'll go far with that. As for what you should watch out for – you should probably be a bit careful of the guilt. It took a while for me to convince Andromeda because she didn't want to drag me into her insane family. They're all very guilty, you know? About having insane families influencing their insane decisions. About being richer –"
"About being pureblood," added June, smirking.
Ted laughed even more. It was almost a relief to be able to say that and make fun of it with someone who understood it. June didn't bother biting back her laughter.
Sirius burst into the room. "Come for – what are you both laughing at?"
June's eyes widened when she saw Sirius, wearing a flowery apron.
"Muggleborn thing," Ted said smoothly. "Come on, June."
June jumped to her feet. "You said you didn't know how to cook!" she accused Sirius.
"I don't," said Sirius, jumping back in alarm. "I was only helping out a little. Dora said I can't cook if I don't wear an apron."
Dora entered the room at the right moment to testify. She was wearing a small apron for her small four year old self, patterned with ducks. "I did," said Dora. "June, do you want one?"
June turned to Ted. "You should take a picture of them. Wearing aprons."
"Hey!" said Sirius. "Don't –"
"Hold them before he takes off," Ted ordered, rushing to what she presumed was his study. Sirius immediately reached to take his apron off, and June crossed the room with speed that she didn't know she possessed and held his hands off.
"Don't you dare!" she warned, laughing.
"Williams, I swear to God," began Sirius. "If anyone sees this –"
"You'll have me hung and quartered," June finished. "I know. Come on, you'll look cute!"
Dora patted Sirius' arm with her wooden spoon. "Mum says she doesn't take enough pictures."
Chastised, Sirius complied. His ears red, he re-tied his apron strings, held Dora's hand when Ted returned, and stood for the photograph. He glared at June when she asked for a copy of the photograph, and Ted promised to send her one whenever he had developed the roll of film.
Some things came easy.
They sat for dinner, and June regarded the spread of food. Remembering what Ted had said, she made a point to compliment how everything looked, and found Andromeda smiling at her in a more genuine way than she had so far. Once she had taken a much larger serving of everything than she normally would have, they began to talk.
"So, June," said Andromeda, passing around the mashed potatoes. Ted was explaining how aprons were made to Dora. "What do your parents do?"
June served herself the potatoes. "My mother's a department store clerk. My father is in steelworks."
"Really?" asked Dora, instantly distracted. "Then how do you go to Hogwarts?"
"I'm a muggleborn," June offered.
"Like Dad?" she asked. "Is it expensive for muggleborns to go? Why do they both have jobs?"
Andromeda placed a hand on Dora's, shaking her head.
June tried to ignore her tell-tale blush. "Well, yeah, it is for me. It's alright though, I have a summer job myself."
"Did you have one too, Dad?" asked Dora, not having taken her mother's hint. Andromeda tried to distract her by piling her plate with chicken. Sirius passed June a quick look, which instantly calmed her down. She really didn't have anything to hide from these people, terribly middle class though they may be.
"Yes," he said hesitantly. "I worked at an ice cream place, I think."
"I work summers at Mr Ollivander's. He pays really well," said June. "The rest of the expenses are covered by scholarship."
The knives and forks clinked while everyone ate the food.
"Would you like some elderflower wine, June?"
"Oh – um, no, thank you. I don't handle alcohol well," she confessed.
Andromeda laughed. "Do you live in London?" she asked, cutting into her meat.
"No, I live in the North East of England," she said.
"That's quite a commute to Diagon Alley!" Ted exclaimed. Despite their very nice conversation, she supposed being working class was unique to her.
"I take the knight bus," she said. "It's not so bad. Gives me the hives sometimes, but I enjoy it."
Andromeda nodded. June thought about dinners with her Mum and Dad, which had gone out of fashion from when she was nine, about all the time she had spent in Hogwarts eating alone or playing a game of chess with Dorcas, about how long it had been that someone had cooked for her and laid it out in a table that seated six. She watched Dora insist that she could serve potatoes herself and felt a rush of affection for this unknown family.
"You're getting better, 'Dromeda," said Sirius, finishing his potatoes.
June rolled her eyes. "You can't cook, Sirius. You can't pass judgements on others, either."
"Hear, hear!" said Andromeda. June was beginning to think she actually might have made a good impression. "Thank you, June."
Sirius gave a short, barking laugh. "I do appreciate you having us, though, 'Dromeda."
"You could have fooled me," she said, sipping her wine primly. She paused. "Uncle Alphard would have liked this."
Sirius was quiet. June watched him. She didn't understand this – this was not something she could navigate with him. It had cost a lot for the life he had found here, for all three people in the room. Dora didn't know that, but June did. And there would come a time, she would have to make the same choice. It was surprising to her, how much Sirius had changed her already – a few months ago, this wouldn't have been a question – she would rather have faded into the background and returned home than try to make a better life for herself. Now – she was certain of where she would go, of what she would choose, but a younger version of her would have been surprised at her choice.
"He would have," he said finally. "Easter was a good time for him."
"All of that chocolate," sniffed Andromeda. Her eyes were far away, like she was remembering something very specific. "No wonder he had a heart attack."
Sirius laughed. "You don't mince words, 'Dromeda."
"We're glad you brought June, though," said Andromeda. "Uncle Alphard would have loved to meet your girlfriend."
"She's not –"
"I would have liked him too," said June.
He stared at her, surprised. June tried not to meet his eyes, but she could feel a smile coming on her face almost instinctually. The world felt soft and hazy and somewhat happy. Like they had a good story between them, with better traditions. She held his hand for a little while under the table. Thankfully, Andromeda and Ted pretended to be none the wiser.
It's good to be back! Hope you all liked this :D
