After weeks of being on her own, while Blue and Snow tried everything they could to break her, being around all these people was suddenly overwhelming.

Emma lay in bed, feeling the warmth of her wife's body against her, letting herself bask in the feeling.

She had missed this.

Blue and Snow had not paid much attention to her comfort, while they held her captive. The cell was drafty, damp and cold, and all she was given was a thin scratchy blanket and not even a pillow. She had nothing to sleep on but the uneven stone floor, and even that she shared with the odd rat that ran though. Clothes were provided, but the facilities were lacking, and once a day she was provided with a bowl of tepid water, soap and a cloth, to try to keep herself clean. It had been miserable.

Now, she was in a warm soft bed, in a beautiful room, and had her wife tucked into her side, and an arm thrown across her waist. She had eaten well last night for the first time in weeks, and she had been surrounded by people who loved her.

So why did she feel so 'off'?

Weeks of no company had left her affection starved and yet when she was in the dining hall last night, with everyone scrambling around to talk to her, she had wanted nothing more than to escape and be on her own again. It didn't make any sense.

Emma shut her eyes, and just let her mind drift. She was here, she was safe, and she had her family around her. That was all that mattered to her.

Regina stirred, as if by instinct she knew that Emma was awake. Pulling her head back she looked at Emma and her face lit up with the most beautiful smile Emma had ever seen.

"Morning, baby," Emma greeted her.

"Good morning, darling. You have no idea how many times I have dreamt of this moment since you disappeared. It doesn't feel real," admitted Regina, "I have missed you so much."

"Thinking of you, was the only thing that kept me going," Emma confided, "I used to keep my eyes closed when I woke up just so I could pretend for a little while longer, that I was back with you and the kids."

"I can't imagine what this must have been like for you," Regina said sadly, "it was horrible for me, not knowing where you were but I had the children here and lots of support from our family. It breaks my heart to know that you were on your own."

"Not always," muttered Emma.

"You had company?" asked Regina.

"I wouldn't call it that," Emma told her, "it was more like a nightmare come to life."

"What did they do to you, Emma?" Regina asked, hoping the question wouldn't upset her wife. Emma had been surprisingly tight-lipped since her return, and Regina presumed, correctly, that she was trying to protect her from the truth.

Emma sighed, "are you sure you want to hear this? It's over now and we can move on."

"Darling, you don't have to tell me, but it might do you good to talk about it. To share it with me," Regina suggested, "and I hate not knowing," she added.

Emma relented, seeing how important it was to her wife, "everyday they would force a potion down my throat and make me drink it. The potion was meant to make me susceptible to suggestion, as well as causing hallucinations and disorientation."

"Why would they do that?" wondered Regina, out loud.

"They were trying to turn me against you and our family. Blue disguised herself as you, and would say terrible things to me, thinking I would believe it was you. I always knew it wasn't though," Emma reassured her.

"You did? How?"

"A couple of ways. Firstly, she may have looked like you, but she held herself differently. Her posture was wrong and so were her mannerisms, so I would have known instantly, anyway. However, I could feel through the bond that it wasn't you. Even as she spat hurtful things at me, all I could feel was your love. I'm surprised they didn't take that into consideration, really."

"Oh Emma, that must have been awful. Even if it wasn't me, I hate that you will always have memories of me being so nasty toward you," Regina sighed.

"I always knew it wasn't you though, I never doubted it once. I played along though, and every day I made it look like I believed them a little more. I hated giving them the satisfaction of thinking they were winning, but I thought it would be my only way out of the cell. I had to get back to you, and I didn't care what I had to do, to do it," Emma confessed, "if I had stayed, my fate would have been a lot worse."

Regina looked at her curiously, "oh?"

"Snow had… plans. Turning me against you and our family was only the first step. She was thinking more into the future than that though. She planned to turn me into the perfect Princess, and then arrange my marriage to a suitable Prince from another kingdom. Once I had provided an heir, she would have full control of the kingdom. She could shape the child into anything she wanted. Well, that was her plan."

"You know, she is now living with Blue. As in, they are sharing the same suite of rooms in her castle. I don't understand how she can be so against you, her daughter, being married to a woman, when she is now involved with Blue," Regina told her, "none of it makes any sense."

"I think both of them are actually a little crazy. I don't mean that as a figure of speech, I mean it literally. Snow spent hours, every single day, just watching me from the shadows," Emma explained, "she didn't know that I could tell she was there, but I could almost feel the satisfaction she had when Blue was torturing and tormenting me."

"She watched Blue do that to you? And yet she claimed to love you. What kind of a mother does that to their child?" Regina spat, anger making her shake.

"I guess I'm not good enough for her. I never was, not for any of the people who have called themselves my parents since I was a child," Emma said sadly.

Regina pulled her closer, "you are more than good enough, my love. You are a wonderful, kind, generous, brave and extremely beautiful woman, and every single day I wonder how I am lucky enough to deserve you."

Emma felt sad. Any confidence and self-belief she had gained as a result of Regina and her family in Storybrooke, had been undone. Blue and Snow may not have broken her bond with Regina, but they had broken her down in other ways.

Regina could feel how upset Emma was, even though her face was currently not displaying any emotion at all. She knew Emma. She was trying to protect her, in her own way, by not talking about her problems. Regina wished that she wouldn't, but she understood. Emma did need to talk though, it was the only way she would get past everything that had happened to her. Who would she talk to though?

"How about you have a nice bath, relax for a little while, and I will return with a breakfast tray for us to share?" Regina suggested.

"That sounds perfect, actually," Emma agreed, not wanting to admit she didn't feel comfortable in the dining hall with everybody, then something occurred to her, "how did you run me a bath last night? This is the Enchanted Forest?"

"Mal and I made some adjustments when we first arrived, and indoor plumbing was one of them," Regina smiled at the excited look on Emma's face, "that's how I ran you a bath. It's powered by a central reserve of magic that Mal and I have been topping up daily. That way our people have access to hot and cold running water."

"Wow, you really have been busy," Emma smiled, even as she felt sad inside. There was so much she needed to catch up on, so much had happened and Emma felt like an outsider looking in on a world where she should belong, but didn't quite fit.

Regina looked at her with concern on her face. She could feel Emma's turbulent emotions, but Emma was not talking to her about it. She wouldn't force the issue, yet, but she was definitely worried about her wife.

"I'll be back soon, ok?" Regina asked.

Emma responded by kissing her slowly, "ok, but I'll miss you."

Regina laughed, "I'll miss you too."

xxxxxxxxxx

Regina walked into the dining hall, and cringed at the noise of more than 30 people all talking at once. How must this have felt to Emma, after so long alone? Spotting Mal on the other side of the room, she set off to talk to her.

"Good morning, how's Emma settling in?" Mal asked.

Regina looked around to make sure no one could hear their conversation.

"She's glad to be home, but I'm worried about her."

"Really? Why?" Mal queried, "has she said something?"

"No, and I think that's the problem. She told me a little bit of what happened to her, but I feel like there is so much she isn't sharing with me. I know her, and I know she is trying to protect me by not burdening me with what she thinks are her problems," Regina confided.

"She's been through a lot. It may take her a while to process it," Mal advised her.

"Would you talk to her?" Regina asked hopefully, "she trusts you, and she won't be so worried about upsetting you, in the same way."

"I can try, and I will. It may not be that easy though," Mal warned her.

"Just try," begged Regina.

"I will," promised Mal.

xxxxxxxxxx

A knock at the door alerted Emma to Mal's presence, just before a head appeared around the door.

"Hey, Mal," greeted Emma.

"Come on, Saviour, we have somewhere to be," Mal informed her, stalking over to the bed and reaching out a hand to pull Emma to her feet. A little tough love was probably what was needed to get Emma to leave this room, where she had been stewing since she arrived at the castle.

"Where are we going? Where is Regina?" Emma asked, slightly disgruntled about the fact she had been forcefully dragged to her feet.

"I'm taking you flying," Mal told her, with a sparkle of mischief in her eye.

Emma actually looked excited at that, though it was tinged with fear at the same time, "Really?"

"Yes. Come along," Mal spun on her heel and walked out the room, leaving Emma no choice but to follow.

Outside in the courtyard, Mal turned to her, "with your permission I would like to use two spells. One is a stabiliser, much like I used with Willow, so that you can't fall off."

"Ok, and the second?" Emma asked.

"A communication spell so that we can talk when I am in dragon form."

"Oh. Ok. Go ahead," Emma told her.

Mal moved her hands so quickly that Emma couldn't even work out what gesture she had used. Before she knew it, Mal was transforming, in front of her eyes.

"Use my front leg as a step, and then swing your leg over my back," Mal encouraged her.

Emma walked up cautiously. She had always been a little scared of heights, and being up in the air on the back of a dragon, with nothing to hold on to, was a frightening prospect. Especially since Mal always took great pleasure in scaring her, if the opportunity arose.

Once she was seated, Mal spoke to her, "there are tough ridges of skin on my neck in front of you. You won't fall because of the spell, but if it makes you more comfortable then you may use those ridges to hold on, if you wish. You won't hurt me."

Emma felt in front of her, and found them immediately, "that feels safer," she admitted.

Mal didn't reply but with one strong flap of her wings, she rose into the air gracefully, a deep laugh rumbling through her when she heard Emma squeal with fear.

Taking pity on her, Mal flew straight for a while, letting Emma get used to it. When she felt her start to relax though, Mal couldn't resist swooping down in a dive, before circling low over the trees in front of them.

"Hey!" Emma called indignantly, "warn me next time!"

Mal just laughed, and Emma eventually joined in. This was actually really fun, and it was nice to see some of the area surrounding the castle. She didn't really know this part of the Enchanted Forest, from when she was here before.

Mal flew for quite a while, both of them comfortable with the silence. Heading towards a hilltop, Mal slowed down, before coming to a stop, in a clearing that overlooked the valley below. Emma climbed off, ruefully noting that her legs felt like jelly, as Mal transformed back to her human form. Mal took one look at Emma stumbling around and laughed at her, "I think we're going to have to start calling you Bambi," she grinned.

Emma grinned back, "you enjoyed that far too much!"

Mal laughed, "guilty as charged. Now, let's sit down, and then, Emma, you're going to do something even more scary."

"I am? What?" wondering what the dragon was going to come out with now.

"You're going to talk to me," Mal replied lightly, leading them over to a boulder. She summoned a bottle of wine and two glasses, pouring a nice full measure for them both.

"What do you want me to talk about?" Emma cautiously asked.

"Anything you want. What's on your mind? You seem ill at ease since you came back?"

Emma sighed. She had a feeling that Regina had put Mal up to this, but rather than stubbornly refuse to talk, she knew that maybe it would help.

"I'm having trouble adjusting, I guess," shrugged Emma, "I spent all that time locked up, and I was so looking forward to going home. It just never occurred to me that it was never going to happen."

"What do you mean?" Mal asked.

"Well, I had no idea you were all in the Enchanted Forest. I thought that if I could escape that cell, that I would eventually be able to find a way home, and I would be back in Storybrooke with you all. When I got out though, everything had changed."

"I hadn't considered that, Emma, I'm sorry. That must have been a shock for you," Mal sympathised.

"I don't want to sound ungrateful, but I came here before, just after the curse broke, and I hated it. I never wanted to live here, you know? Everybody else has lived here before, except for Henry, but he always wanted to. Everybody else was able to pack a bag with all of their important belongings, and bring it with them. I know Regina brought what she could for me, but I never got to choose. I feel like I've lost everything."

Mal looked at her, why hadn't they considered that this might be so hard for her? All they had thought about was rescuing her and getting her somewhere safe, but it must be really hard for the young woman.

"I understand, Emma. Not first hand, but I think I understand why this is hard for you," Mal said.

"You know, all of the people in Storybrooke, all they have ever known is life in the town or here in the Enchanted Forest. For me though? I lived in the real world and there are friends there, old colleagues and even foster brothers and sisters, who I will never see again. I never got the chance to say goodbye, and I hate that they will think I have just disappeared."

"None of us considered what this must be like for you, I'm so sorry," Mal apologised.

"Don't get me wrong, I'm so grateful to be with you all, I missed you all so much, including you, dragon," Emma winked, "but the only life I ever knew has gone forever, and I don't know how to live here. Nothing is the same anymore, and it will never be the same again. I feel like I'm grieving for the only life I've ever had. Does that make sense?"

"Yes, it does, " Mal nodded, putting an arm around Emma and pulling her in for a sideways hug. Emma rested her head on Mal's shoulder and the two of them sat, not talking, until the light started to dim. Comfortable companionship acting like balm to sooth Emma's tumultuous emotions.

"Ready to go back to the castle?" Mal asked.

"Ready to go home," Emma confirmed, "thank you, Mal. I really needed this today."

"You're very welcome. I am always here if you need to talk, but you should know that you can talk to Regina too. She's strong enough to support you and you don't need to protect her from how you feel."

"I know I could, but I just don't want her to be hurt by what I say, because I am so happy to be with her again, and nothing is more important than that," Emma explained.

"Have you considered that by not talking, and shutting her out, rather than protecting her you're hurting her anyway?" Mal suggested.

Emma suddenly paled, "oh. I didn't think of that. You're right!"

"Of course I am," Mal drawled, "now let's go back and you can tell Regina everything you told me. She will understand, and she wants to help."

Emma hugged her, "I really love you, Mal. Thank you."

Mal blushed, embarrassed with the affection, "I love you too, Saviour."

No other words were spoken, as Mal transformed and Emma climbed up, before they flew home. Emma felt much more settled than she had when they had flown here. Mind you, she thought to herself, that could be the bottle of wine they had shared.