Nirvana

Summary: AU. "Well, fuck you too," he had said it out of spite, despite his eyes sneaking brief glances over her body. Well, maybe he had another thing in mind when he said it. Okikagu.

Disclaimer: I do not own Gintama.

Chapter 24

"Are you satisfied now?" Okita's detached baritone sounded in the midst of the bustling street as him and Kagura ambled their way through the horde of bystanders trudging past them.

In Kagura's hands was a gigantic plastic condensed with an unhealthy amount of sukonbu as she raised a single fist in the air in the form of a contented pump. A beaming smile played on her lips as she jovially cheered, more to herself than to the sadist sauntering beside her, "Hell yeah! Now I've got a month's worth of sukonbu. And I didn't even have to pay for any of it!" A wholehearted bouts of evil laughter escaped her before she then pinned a teasing ogle on her boyfriend's admittedly annoyed stature. "You're quite useful sometimes, doggie. I don't even have to waste any cash on food with you around because you treat me to everything. You're the best sugar daddy."

"Who the hell are you calling a sugar daddy, you rotten bitch?" Okita retorted with the bitter riposte as he jolted his leg upwards to confer her a sharp kick to the back of her right knee. A rather unbecoming cry of pain erupted from Kagura's throat in return, the sound mingling with the suspicious telltale sign of her comparing his hair color to the runny, long trail of poop she had projectiled that morning as he went on, "I'm your lover, your master. I ain't your sugar daddy. What do you take me for, a money machine? And just because I'm a little nice…"

Kagura lurched herself off the brick pavement of the ground, feminine features contorted into an expression of pure, unadulterated rage as she readied herself into a fighting position, seeming all too prepared to assault him right back. However, as she discerned the purse of his lips into a sulking pout and perceived the slight frown on his forehead that appeared to radiate displeasure, the surge of anger pooling in her instantly waned, giving way to an abrupt frisson of guilt as the feeling stabbed into her skin like needles and icepicks.

"Oi, sadist. Are you moping now?" she asked him as she started strolling right beside him once more, her voice a nervous laughter as she gave him an admittedly awkward but playful pat on his shoulder. She had expected him to give out some sort of reaction like he regularly would, but he simply kept his gaze up ahead and retained his brooding posture. The slightly high-strung smile on her lips faltered as her mouth tugged down into a remorseful scowl.

"Hey, I was just kidding," she continued, almost imploring as she reached to seize a gentle but firm hold around the sleeve of his shirt. When he remained unresponsive, Kagura made to grab for his hand instead, quickly interlocking their fingers together before he could even draw apart to sulk even more. "You know that was just a joke. You know, J.K! I didn't mean it, I know you're my boyfriend. I was just teasing you a little."

He eventually did justify her with some form of acknowledgement, though it rippled out of him in a hurt – but feigned – baritone as he quietly muttered the words in a disheartened fashion under his breath, "You say that after you just implied that you've been using me for my money? How awful of you to make light of my feelings and generosity like that. Shall I arrest you for toying with the heart of a dutiful boyfriend like myself?"

"I-" She panicked for a moment, the guilt building in her stomach growing in size as a bearing of self-shame then plastered itself on her snowy complexion. "I wasn't trying to hurt your feelings or anything like that at all! I was just making a joke. A bad joke, but still…" she trailed off, her own lips now jutting forward into a petulant expression. "I'm sorry, okay? I appreciate everything you've done for me, it's just a little embarrassing to admit it sometimes and I end up being a little mean."

A long, drawn out sigh of mock sadness bubbled out his throat as he supplied the dejected response, "You don't seem to have a problem voicing your fondness for Shinpachi and Danna. Maybe you prefer having them as your boyfriends instead. I'm just a useless hack of a sadist after all."

"I-it's not like that, alright?! Sure, I care about Pachi-boy and Danna, but I care for you in a different way, okay?" Kagura's loud shriek echoed in his ears, causing him to stifle an amused fit of chuckles as he noted the alarmed reassurance in her high-pitched voice. "Admitting how I feel about them is easy, but you- you make me nervous on another level and it's a little hard…"

"To put it simply, you only act like a tsundere around me then?"

"…Well, I'm only in love with you after all," she murmured under her breath, her baritone barely above the octave of a hushed whisper as the meek mutter rumbled through her chest. Her cheeks warmed before turning bright red in embarrassment as blood rushed to her head.

Okita couldn't resist the rather self-satisfied but warm smile that tilted at the corners of his lips at the admittedly endearing display.

They had been together for well over a year now, and had been cohabitating at his place for a good six months. Everything was going more than perfectly for them, and having her actually become his lover was a lot better in real life than in his dreams and fantasies.

Other than juggling through incessant death threats from Gin and Shinpachi whenever he came to work, relentless assassination endeavors from Kamui and persistent interrogations that eventually escalated into full-on brawls to ensure his worth as her significant other with Umibouzu, everything was right in the world for Okita Sougo.

The fact that he was on the verge of demise each passing day paled in comparison to the bliss of being hers and hers, his. And he did tend to overcompensate when it came to the women he adored, so it wasn't a strange or even uncommon occurrence for him to bend his back in order to fulfill any and all wishes she might have had. Whether it was running to the store to satiate her unhealthy obsession with sukonbu, or taking care of her whenever she was sick, or letting her win in their two-player games that they played on his PS4, and a lot more – Okita Sougo simply reckoned that seeing her happy and smiling every day was more than worth the struggle.

If the over five hundred thousand worth of images dedicated to her that he had dutifully categorized in an entirely different album of their memories as a couple was anything to go by, then the fact that she had him wrapped around her finger was more than ample to let everyone know how whipped he was for her. In spite of him being the dominant and sadistic one in their sexual intercourses, she was the one who had him collared and leashed outside their bedroom trysts. Ironically enough, despite himself being the more sexually aggressive one in their coupling, Kagura was the one who normally spoiled him rotten and ordered him around. Perhaps it was due to how insecure and soft he actually was on the inside, but he was actually a lot more emotionally sensitive than she was at times, and she often found herself being the one having to reassure him of how important he was to her. If he had to word it properly, he would most likely describe her as a demonic wife that consistently demanded him to do all sort of chores and commands for her. Something she inherited from her mother, as Umibouzu had once informed him before. And he was nothing short of her submissive and doting husband.

Not that he minded, he liked how bossy she was – outside of sex, of course, because that was his playtime, his turn to assume the more dominant and firm role.

That said, however, while he was clingy to a fault, Kagura retained slivers of her tsundere bearing towards him and more often than not, was too embarrassed to verbalize out loud what she really wanted from him. He did enjoy teasing her though. This current moment was an example for one. He was quite fond of how she would always panic whenever he moped, and how desperate she would seem as she attempted to persuade him. It was one of the instances where she was more honest with her feelings for him, and he utilized every opportunity he could acquire to see the more vulnerable side of her.

"Hmm." He pretended to consider something as he tilted his head to the side in a thoughtful manner as if to appear that he was deep in thought. There was a short-lasting pause as he feigned a look of recognition on his boyish features, snapping his fingers together as he then curved his lips into an impertinent grin. He levelled a seductive stare on his girlfriend's now blushing face as he then formed the sly request, "In that case, to show me how sorry you are, kiss me right here and now. In front of everyone passing by. Then I'll forgive you."

Her eyelids fluttered to give him a couple of blinks of confusion before the scarlet hue on her cheeks intensified into deeper shades of crimson. "What are you, insane? This again? What is this, are we walking down the memory lane of our first date or something? I'll have you know that I'm not falling for that trick again-"

"Oh." He adopted a masqueraded demeanor of disappointment. "So I guess you don't feel that bad after all. Well, never mind then. I'll just cry into my pillow again tonight- oh, and you're sleeping on the couch. Consider it your just deserts. Oh, mother, how shall I deal with this broken heart of mine-"

Despite all that was said and done, Kagura still complied. And although the tug at his collar was gripping and forceful enough to nearly choke him out of air, he pursed his lips just in time to ready himself for the feeling of her mouth against his. And like all the times they had kissed before, this kiss as well was nothing short of joy-inducing and magical.

And when he told her just how he felt every time they kissed, the gut-punch she bestowed him with was painful and violent enough to prompt an inkling of suspicion within him that she might have broken a bone or two in his ribcage. However, the physical torment was worth watching the wonderful expressions of giddiness mixed with embarrassment that would find themselves on her refined face every time.

He did like living on the edge after all. And if facing the threat of a potential coma was something he had to endure in order to display how he felt about her, Okita Sougo was prepared to live a life filled with hell and heaven. Of bliss and misery. If that was where she was, he would venture into just about any territory possible.


"Oi, China," he had started as they entered the living room of their now shared residence. Kagura was chewing on a piece of sukonbu, splattering her spit everywhere on the carpeted floor all the while as he eventually flopped down on an unoccupied space next to her on the couch when he uttered the unforeseen exclamation, "I was thinking this for a while now, but how do you feel about tying the knot in a couple of years? I'd like to prepare myself for the one-to-four battle up ahead, so it's a good thing that wedding preparations take a while, but I'd still like to get hitched-"

She projectiled a mixture of saliva and a mushy substance of half-eaten sukonbu all over his face, the abrupt and disgusting reaction instantly silencing his bold declaration. He drew his lips tight into a patient smile as she gagged on and sought to cough out a splinter of pickled seaweed that had lodged itself in her throat before she finally managed to push it out of her, the saliva-coated seaweed collapsing to the floor in a rather repulsive mess as she tried to regain her composure.

When she eventually did, her breathing was in retching gasps and her mouth was trembling and cheeks heating up in a familiar blush as she cutely stumbled over her words, "W-w-what are you talking about, stupid sadist?! Is this a sick prank? How can you say that with a straight face-"

His genuinely bewildered blink was sluggish as he steadily droned out his reply, "Well, I mean, you know how you're like this diabolical wife-"

Timidity and shock forgotten, what took its place was complete infuriation as she clenched one hand into a tight, furious fist before jerking her arm forward to land a vehement strike across his face. "Who are you calling a diabolical wife, you piece of shit?!"

He caught her wrist in his hand, his grasping fingers gentle but firm as he proceeded to pay no heed to the long string of insults escaping her in favor of continuing where he left off, "-and I'm a pitiful but docile husband who got trapped in your web of interminable danger, forced into a life of slavery and submission as you boss me around-"

"What's so pitiful about you, you damn idiot?!" Her right leg lunged forward to propel a forceful kick at his ribcage, but it was promptly halted mid-assault as he motioned his free hand to seize a tender but stern clutch around her ankle as well, stopping her attack just in time as he leaned closer to push her back against the couch cushiony seat. Tears peeked at the corners of her eyes as she sniffled before expelling an angered roar, "If you're in that much pain being in a relationship with me, then just go on ahead and leave! I get it, I'm not the girliest girl around and I'm a handful to handle but I'm-"

"Shut up for a moment. I'm not done talking," he firmly cut her off, his voice solemn but possessing undertones of tender affection as he peered down at her with intense devotion that threatened to swallow her whole. "So you know how we're like that. Like an old married couple. You're the wicked wife and I'm the obedient, faithful husband- but isn't it a little weird that we're not actually married? So I was thinking, how about we make that an actual reality? How about I turn you into my actual bride?"

His voice was its trademark aloof baritone, but even she could detect the patent implications of deep-rooted love and steeled resolve lying underneath as he levelled a steadfast gaze on her, his eyes locked with hers as he awaited for a response.

Her cheeks burned a hotter pitch. "…Are you sure? Are you really serious right now?"

Okita nodded once in an affirmative fashion, a lopsided smirk slanting at the edges of his mouth as he provided her his own convoluted response, "More serious than my intentions to kill Hijikata."

"…You might get yourself killed in the process, you know?"

"Whatever. I got your papi, Kamui, Danna and Shinpachi to accept us dating. I can convince them again. Besides, I'm used to their attacks at this point- I think I've gotten better at avoiding Kamui's umbrella for one-"

"I don't see a ring though," she huffed, abruptly putting a halt to his ramblings.

He pulled out what seemed to be a Burger King Chicken Fries ring from out of nowhere before sliding it through her ring finger. It dangled around the slender digit instead of actually fitting her, seemingly a little too bit. "Settle with this for now. I'll buy you the most expensive engagement ring after I gather a bit of cash. Might cost me an arm and a leg, but I'm willing to sacrifice those limbs-"

She cut him off with another sulking retort, "You called me a diabolical wife though. Said I was a danger to you and-"

"Don't you get it?" he scoffed at her before leaning forward to touch their foreheads together, his passion-filled pools of scarlets looking into her pair of timid ceruleans as he whispered, "That's what I want, China. I want you. No other woman will do, and no other woman can handle me anyway. Just like how there's no other guy but me who can take your beatings and live to see the next day either."

Kagura's heart was beginning to swell almost painfully and unbearably in her chest, the surge of glee in her system too powerful for her as she shyly provided an answer, "…It's gonna be hard to convince them. If you're prepared for that, then-"

"I told you. I convinced them once, so I'll convince them again." He paused to place one hand on her covered belly, keeping his fingers still there for only a brief moment before he swiftly shoved his hand into her shirt and observed his long, callous fingers disappear to explore the flushed skin underneath. Soft pants rippled out of her almost immediately before he silenced them with his lips, his kiss a gentle, featherlight peck on her mouth as he murmured against her, "Or, you know, we can take a more questionable route and get you pregnant for real this time. Put a baby inside your womb, and I'm sure none of them would be able to put much of a fight. Consider it an extra measure."

"…You're twisted," she sighed, but a warm and happy smile lingered on the corners of her lips.

"That's what you chose, so deal with it."

A brief disquietude poured over them as Kagura appeared to contemplate the pros and cons of resulting to such a thing. A glimmer of mischief in her sapphire blue orbs supplied him the reply he needed before the smile on her face spread into a toothy grin as she nodded her head at him. "Alright. Let's do it. In fact, let's have twins or something. Make it twice as harder for them to say no to the marriage."

"I don't really care as long as it's ours. But I hope you know that babies don't start existing themselves. You need a bit of something else – something that only yours truly can give you – to actually pop a few of them out-"

"Shut up. I know." She snorted at him before reaching an arm upwards to grip her fingers around his collar, yanking him down hard as she slammed his lips against hers. The hushed whisper that she articulated against his mouth sounded as if it was carried off in the wind as the syllables bubbled out of her, "Love me then, sadist."

"Stupid request, piggie." He laughed at her just as her other hand found the buckle of his belt. A nuzzle of his nose against hers, then came his affectionate response, "I mean, I already do after all." He paused to brush their lips together in a tender kiss before breaking apart to stare deep into her eyes. "I love you, Kagura."

She let him as he began peeling her clothes off of her. "Mm-hmm. I know. I love you too, Sougo. Maybe, just maybe, a little bit more than sukonbu."

The next day, when he called Gin, Umibouzu, Shinpachi and Kamui to their house and courageously announched his intentions to marry Kagura – excluding their schemes to impregnate her in order to clinch an easier path to tying the knot – he had been more than ready to run around town for the entire day as they chased after him with the full intent to butcher him and hang different parts of his body as decorations in their respective homes.

But when he finally did acquire their blessing after surviving their brutal abuse – in the form of them reluctantly combining their forces to beat him into a pulp and seeing how long he would last, it was worth the pain and broken bones that he would surely have to endure for a few months when he saw how giddy Kagura had been as he came back home looking as if he had just barely escaped death.

Kagura was worth everything that he would have to give up just to have a family with her, because he knew that he would be gaining a lot more in compensation in the near future.

Then they both received what they wished for when Kagura actually did get pregnant a few months later. Fraternal twins, in fact. One girl and one boy. She was about 5 months in, they were halfway done with wedding preparations, and they were discussing baby names when she asked him,

"Can we name the boy Sofa-kun?"

She really was planning to milk that joke for as long as she could, wasn't she?

He responded with a heated glare. "You name him that and I'll turn you into a fucking sofa myself, China. Let's go with Goku, and we'll name the girl Bulma or something."

"Why not Chi-Chi?"

"You do know that Goku and Chinpo(penis) got married in the series, don't you? Feels wrong if we use her name. Doesn't it give you kind of incestuous vibes?"

"It's not Chinpo, it's Chi-Chi, shithead. Are crotches the only thing guys think about?"

And so that was how their conversation went. From mentioning characters from other anime, to pouring out the names of real-life celebrities, before they finally settled with Souichirou and Kanna. Although, knowing China, she most likely would change her mind later on after giving birth to them.

But it was fine. This was his paradise now. Their safe haven.

Nirvana, to him, was no longer about seeking the sadistic pleasure of trying to take Hijikata's life.

Nirvana, to him, was now her. His rival, his partner-in-crime, his best friend, his biggest blessing, his woman. His Kagura.

She was the epitome of nirvana itself. He was the human personification of an abrupt stroke of luck. Now with the addition of their children who would most likely turn out to be devils like their crackhead parents, their heaven would simply proceed to grow even more.

If he could get his soon-to-be-wife to stop considering adding Runny Diarrhea to their kids' names of course.


A/N: I don't know if I did their ending any justice. Feels like it was better in my head. But I tried my best, and I hope you guys enjoyed the final installment of Nirvana! It was a long but fun ride, and I'm sad to see it now over. However, as I've mentioned before, I'm more happy to finally see this Okikagu fic through to completion. But no worries, I'll be popping out more (hopefully good) Okikagu stories and I hope you guys are willing to support me in my future endeavors.

JuneyOkikagu, CheeryLola, lightbattery, Heatherishere- Aw, you guys are so sweet! I'm usually very insecure about my writing, so having all of you wonderful readers crowning and calling me queen really means a lot more to me than you might think T.T Thank you for raising my self-esteem. I was scared that people might be turned off from the last chapter, so I'm ecstatic to see that so many actually enjoyed it. And I'm glad to know that every last one of us here is a proud pervert lol, I guess Okikagu or Gintama fans in general are perverts lolol, or at least pretty much more open-minded than other fandoms.

I've read people saying that they get turned off by dirty talk or crude words in smut, but there are also people who would laugh if the language is too 'formal', (for example if I wrote penis someone would think that I was trying to give a science lesson and that would take the hotness away from the smut.) I try to stay in between, like saving the crudeness for dialogues and the more formal language for the descriptions. As much as I love smut, it's also one of the aspects that I'm most worried about when it comes to fics, because people have different tastes. I tend to follow what I'm comfortable with though. Well, anyways, I'm sorry for going off on a smut tangent there, lol, I just appreciate you guys so much (not only for the praises regarding smut, but just generally all the support and love you've given me so far).

And I'm so happy that the last update wasn't too much! (Tbh, the side-piece to Sadomasochism is a lot more intense I think…I haven't written it, but I've prepared the sex dialogue lolol). I'm glad that you guys thought it was a perfect combo of fluff and smut, I kept thinking how to incorporate them having mind-blowing sex but also being all mushy with each other. And yes, lol, writing the entire intercourse would take ten thousands of word count so I tend to cut off on the smut scenes.

There's so much I'd like to say, but as usual I'll refrain. But I really, really, really am honored and appreciate all the feedback, love, support and time spent on reading Nirvana. It was a long but fun journey. I'm sad but also satisfied to see it end, but it's been one of my favorite works to write on. My very first Okikagu fic, and it's been such a ride. And no worries, there's gonna be a side-piece to this where you can have a peek-through the lives of the Okita family. (I've got so many compilation ideas though…) Again, thank you so much for staying until the finale of Nirvana! I love all of you, and I'm blessed to be showered with so many compliments and so much love. I hope all of you take care, especially during with the ongoing Corona Virus. I'll see you all again in my other works!