She fell asleep after Bucky came to her room. He held her hand but took up residence in the chair at her bedside.
The next day she was more awake and alert. The doctors understood now that she didn't have memory loss or confusion, she had just been undercover for months.
Wanda was the first to visit, she brought a giant bouquet of flowers and some comfort things from home. She told Evelyn how glad she was that she was alright.
Steve and Nat visited next. Nat and Evelyn talked while Steve stood at the door and Bucky glared at him.
"What's with you two?" Evelyn asked.
"Nothing, sweetheart," Bucky told her, kissing her hand.
"Just a misunderstanding, Shaw," Steve told her and Bucky glared at him harder.
"How is a misunderstanding, nothing?" Evelyn looked to Nat for help but she just shrugged. "Did we get Sharon and Pierce?"
Steve glared at Bucky this time. "All taken care of, they're at the Raft."
"Just focus on getting better so we can go home," Bucky told her, rubbing his thumb across the top of her hand.
"Oh, home," She looked down feeling sad, "you mean the compound."
"What's wrong?" Bucky noticed some tears falling down Evelyn's cheeks.
"I think we should go," Nat pulled Steve from the room. "We'll see you guys later."
Evelyn was full blown crying at this point and Bucky didn't know what to do. He hugged her to his chest and ran his hand down her hair.
"Talk to me," Bucky whispered against her head, kissing her forehead.
"I'm not confused, don't tell the doctors," Evelyn shook her head and wiped away at her tears, "It's just we've been in that house and we've been," She trailed off and started hyperventilating. "My rings!"
"Hey! Hey! It's okay!" Bucky looked at her hand and then around the room. "I'll find them, I promise."
"I'm such a mess," Evelyn took her pillow and covered her face.
"You're my mess," Bucky took the pillow and kissed her nose.
Evelyn let out a giggle. "People are going to think I'm insane."
"We thought that before you were shot," Bucky gave her a mock glare, "Speaking of which."
Evelyn groaned and shook her head, "No, I don't want to talk about it."
"You knew," Bucky accused her. "You knew what was going to happen and you sacrificed yourself for me."
She didn't say anything, she just shrugged.
"Do you remember anything after you got shot?" Bucky asked carefully.
She pursed her lips but still didn't say anything.
"Evie," Bucky sighed, "Promise me you will never ever sacrifice yourself for me."
"Eyes and ears, babe," She shrugged again.
"I didn't keep my promise," He looked at her sadly.
She laid back, feeling exhausted and closed her eyes, "And if you're asking if I remember telling you I love you, the answer is yes. If the question is, did I mean it? The answer is yes."
"Evie," Bucky went to respond but she was asleep.
The next week passed in a similar fashion. Every time Bucky wanted to talk to Evelyn, someone was visiting or she fell asleep. She was going to be released in the next couple of days and Bucky wasn't sure how she would do with it.
Sam told him that the house had been packed up, and their things returned to the compound. Hers in her room, his things in his room. There were some things the team didn't know what to do with so they were waiting for the pair to come home.
Bucky, true to his word, never left Evelyn's side. He used the shower in her hospital room and Nat or Wanda would bring him clothes to change into. Steve and Bucky still hadn't sorted out their issues and Evelyn questioned him about it more than once.
"Are you ready to go?" Bucky came into the room with a wheelchair. Wanda had come to help Evelyn change clothes and to collect all their personal belongings.
"James Buchanan Barnes, there better not be a motorcycle waiting to take me ho-back to the compound!" Evelyn stood with her hands on her hips but he noticed how she stumbled over her words.
For someone who had recently been shot, Evelyn looked really good. Still a little pale, but beautiful nonetheless. She seemed good mentally too. As Sam said, she even asked when the next mission was.
"I was going to," He approached her, putting his hard around her waist, "but I didn't trust anyone to ride it down here."
"Barnes," Evelyn gave him a glare, "What am I going to do with you?"
"Love me?" He gave her a grin and a kiss.
Before she could respond the nurse came with the official discharge paperwork. Evelyn was wheeled out of her room and down to a car waiting for them to take them back to the compound. Her leg bounced nervously as they traveled through the city.
When they got back to the compound, thankfully everyone didn't crowd Evelyn. Bucky escorted her to her room where her things from the hospital littered her bed.
"Are you going to be okay?" He asked her, leaning in her doorway.
"I um, Bucky, I," She stumbled over her words, "Why is this so weird?"
"What? Being back here?" He asked her and she nodded, "I know and I'm just down the hall if you need me."
He walked into the room, kissed her forehead and then left. He cursed himself the whole way down the hall but knew she had to accept that this was their reality, not their house and not their marriage.
Steve stopped Bucky on the way, "Shaw get settled back in?"
"She's working on it," He told his friend. "I'm sorry about punching you."
"I get it," Steve held his hands up in surrender. "You guys did a great job out there."
"I'd feel better if she hadn't gotten hurt," Bucky ran a hand through his hair.
Steve went to say something but Bucky froze, "Did you hear that?"
"What?" Steve asked and Bucky was already on his way back to Evelyn's room.
Bucky walked into Evelyn's room without knocking, with Steve hot on his heels. There the girl sat against the wall, clenching her diamond ring in hand. The rest of her things from her bed were thrown across the room and littered the floor.
"Hey, talk to me, what's wrong?" Bucky dropped to his knees in front of Evelyn.
"You said it was real!" Evelyn cried, "You said I was everything."
"You are," He tried to comfort her and she pushed him away, "Baby doll, what is going on?"
"You!" She gave him a shove and stood from the floor, moving out of her own bedroom, throwing the rings at him "You don't touch me, you don't want me to stay with you," she stuttered, "I told you I love you and you didn't say anything!"
"Buck," Steve warned but Evelyn pushed past both men and left the room in a huff.
"I have no idea what just happened," Bucky took the ring from the floor and looked at the door where Evelyn had gone.
Nat came by the room and found the two men standing there, "Oh good, here you are. What did you do to Shaw? She's in the shooting range cursing your name."
"I fucked up," Bucky looked at the ring again and then he perked up, "I think I have an idea."
"No, no, no way, Buck," Steve stopped his friend from leaving the room. "You can't ask Shaw to marry you."
"Why not? We've been married for months," Bucky shook his head.
"I think Shaw may need to go away for a bit if you guys can't," Steve tried to approach it carefully, "You weren't really married, you both need to accept that or I'll have to have Shaw replaced with a new agent."
"I love her," Bucky tried to explain. "And I'm sorry but it felt real to us. We fell in love on this mission."
"Then tell her that!" Steve threw his hands up, "But don't ask her to marry you. It's way too soon."
"Says the dude hung up on a girl he kissed once," Nat gave Steve a glare and walked away. "Even though there's women right in front of your face who are interested."
"You might want to sort that out," Bucky pointed at Nat and left Steve in the hallway.
Evelyn couldn't sleep that night. Even when she was in the hospital Bucky stayed by her side so she hadn't slept alone since before the mission. It was a strange feeling. She had the bed to herself. She could stretch out. She didn't have to share the blanket. But it all felt wrong.
She got up twice with the intention to go to Bucky's room but stopped herself. She had to get over this. It was just a mission. He was proving that in his actions. Or was he? He only left her side once they got back to the compound.
She tossed and turned until she finally passed out from pure exhaustion. When morning came she went down to the kitchen to find the team.
"Who's up for some training with me today? I feel so out of shape." Evelyn announced. She moved to make coffee but realized a cup was being handed to her.
"Morning, sweetheart," He placed a kiss on her forehead then he whispered in her ear, "I missed you last night."
Evelyn shook all over and remembered the team was watching them and began to make herself and Bucky breakfast.
"Are you even cleared for training, Shaw?" Steve asked, watching the two move around each other as they got their breakfast ready.
"I believe the doc said 'light activity' was okay," Bucky told Steve.
"Is that what they eye-sex you're having is?" Sam asked with a laugh.
Bucky and Evelyn were watching each other, eyes locked, movements matched with one another.
"Shut up, Sam!" They said together.
"I feel fine, really," Evelyn pouted at Bucky, "Please?"
"Sorry kid but you have a meeting with the therapist, S.H.I.E.L.D mandated," Tony interrupted.
Evelyn groaned. She had to see the therapist before after she had shot someone and they died. They were a bad person but the agency still demanded she be cleared for action.
"We could ride the bike, I'll take you," Bucky offered.
"Nope you have paperwork to do," Tony told him.
"I get the feeling they're trying to separate us, sweetheart," Bucky mock whispered and she let out a giggle.
"Can I take the bike?" She looked at him playfully and he sputtered before she said, "Just kidding!"
She went to leave the kitchen to change for the day but he stopped her, "Can I take you somewhere later? Just the two of us?"
She gave him a nod and pushed up on her toes, pressing a kiss to the corner of his mouth. "See you later."
The therapist was awful. She had no personality and she didn't understand Evelyn's humor. They seemed to focus on Evelyn being upset about her 'marriage' to Bucky not being real.
"Do you think Mr. Barnes has feelings for you?" She asked.
"He said he did," Evelyn answered.
"Do you want to be married to Mr. Barnes?" The therapist wrote in her book.
"I mean, eventually I hope we'll be there." Evelyn defended herself.
"Then can you tell me why you, according to your team leader, threw a tantrum in your room over a ring?" She looked down her glasses at Evelyn.
"I'm going to kill Steve," She mumbled and then told the lady, "Look, we- well, I fell in love with Bucky on this mission. I saw the real him. Not the flirty, overly confident, trouble making man. I know how he likes his coffee and that he prefers waffles to pancakes and that he secretly loves to watch trash reality tv at night. It was real. The things we did, the things we said, they were real. The circumstances were weird but I'd like to think if we hadn't been in a life and death situation, we'd still be right where we are."
"And what is your official relationship status with Mr. Barnes?" The therapist asked.
"Um, well, I'm not sure." Evelyn reached for her hand, now naked, and sighed, "We have plans later, maybe I'll ask him."
Bucky on the other hand was setting up for his date with Evelyn. He'd left a pretty dress on her bed with a note saying 'Wear me. Be ready at 7.'
He had a plan, an epic plan, or so he thought at least. He raced back after setting up, just in time to get himself ready and to me Evelyn.
Evelyn came back from her therapy session and found the dress and smiled happily at Bucky's swirly writing. She took a relaxing bath before she got herself ready. She danced around her room to music while she got ready and felt downright giddy.
Once she was dressed, she moved down the stairs of the compound with a little skip in her step.
"Barnes?" Evelyn called out when she reached the bottom. She looked around for him but didn't see anything.
He came up behind her and placed his hands over her eyes, "Do you trust me?"
Evelyn tried to turn in his hold but he kept her firmly in place. "What?"
"Do you trust me?" Bucky asked again, this time against the shell of her ear.
"With my life," She responded, feeling her knees go a little weak.
He replaced his hands with a blindfold and picked Evelyn up. She squealed and he laughed at her antics. She knew he placed her on the back of the motorcycle.
"James Buchanan Barnes, you are not going to make me ride on this death trap with a blindfold on are you?" Evelyn crossed her arms over her chest. "It's completely unsafe."
"Fine, fine," He took the blindfold away and climbed on the motorcycle, taking off as soon as her arms were around his waist. "But you know you love riding on this death trap."
He weaved in and out of traffic within the city. He tried to distract her with the ride, instead of going exactly where they were going. Sometimes he drove in circles, sometimes he just took a longer route.
"Where are we going?" She said into his ear.
He reached back to give her leg a gentle squeeze and then pulled onto a familiar road. Evelyn gasped as they came to a stop.
Bucky stepped off of the bike and held his hand out to her. She didn't move. She looked at him and her eyes welled with tears.
"Why are we here?" She asked him.
"Evie," Bucky picked her up and off of the bike and took her hand in his, "Trust me."
He took her inside and she was shocked. Things looked almost the same as they had left them the day of the shooting. There were pictures of the two hung up on the walls, their favorite blanket was on the back of the couch.
"Bucky," Evelyn looked around, taking it all in.
"I brought you here for a few reasons," Bucky took her hands in his and pulled her towards the couch.
"What were they?" Evelyn asked.
"Well one, we didn't get to say goodbye to this place. It was home for a while." Bucky shrugged as he pulled her into his lap and settled on the couch.
"I was so sad to find out they packed all our stuff up," She looked around the room, "I couldn't find the pictures in my stuff, were they in yours?"
He shook his head, "There's a bunch of stuff they didn't know who was who's. I found them."
"What was the other reason?" Evelyn asked with a smile, curling into Bucky.
"An apology," He told her simply. "When we started this mission, I promised to get you home, I promised to look after you and keep you safe. In the end, you protected me, you saved me. I wanted to apologize for putting you in danger. It was my fault you were shot. It was my fault you were hurt and I owe you an apology for that."
She shook her head but her eyes welled with tears, "You don't get to apologize for something I chose to do."
"Then can I apologize for confusing you in the hospital? I was so ashamed about breaking my promise. I know I didn't leave you but I didn't tell you how I felt, I didn't tell you that I'd been in love with you probably since the first moment I saw you. You laid Sam out that first day in the gym at the compound and I was hooked."
Evelyn went to interject but he put a finger to her lips.
"I'm serious. You thought I was just chasing after you but I just wanted to know you. To know the girl who scared me but made my heart race in my chest. Being paired with you on this mission allowed me to know the real you, not just the you you show to everyone else. I brought you here because we fell in love here, together."
Evelyn had tears pouring down her cheeks at Bucky's confession but he didn't stop there.
"You may not be my wife anymore," Bucky gave her a saucy grin, rubbing the spot where the diamond ring used to sit, "But I was wondering if you'd be my girlfriend?"
"Can I talk now?" She asked with a laugh, wiping at her eyes. He gave her a nod and she kissed him soundly on the lips. "You are the sweetest, kindest, most wonderful man."
"Does that mean you'll be my girlfriend?" He pulled her down for a kiss.
"It does," He kissed her again but she started laughing and he gave her an odd look, "Sorry, It's just you said something similar to what I told the therapist today."
"I did?" He questioned.
"Yeah. Steve told someone about my tantrum and whatever but I said we fell in love, or at least I did, on this mission and that's why I was so upset about not having my ring. It was a symbol of this mission." She rolled her eyes, "First day I'm cleared for training Cap is my first victim."
"It's true, I love you so much sweetheart," Bucky looked deeply into Evelyn's eyes, "When you were shot and I wasn't sure what was happening to you, all I could think about was that I hadn't told you."
"Hey, I'm okay, you're okay and we're okay," She took his face in her hands, "What else did you have planned for this date?"
Bucky picked Evelyn up and threw her over his shoulder, slapping his hand to her bottom, "A proper goodbye to our marriage bed."
Evelyn laughed the entire way up the stairs and the two spent an hour reconnecting (sticking to Evelyn's doctor's orders of light activity) but also saying goodbye to the bed they first shared.
Bucky brought Evelyn back downstairs and the two shared a meal, laughing and making plans for themselves. Evelyn wanted to be back to work and Bucky wanted to whisk her away. She promised to let him take her somewhere after the next mission.
A few weeks went by and Evelyn was cleared to get back to training and true to her word, her first hand to hand fight was against Steve. She taunted him and teased and then took him down. It took a little more work than she was used to but she had been out of the gym for a while. Bucky cheered her on from the sideline.
"Can I roll around the mat with you Shaw?" Bucky called to her like he had done before the mission.
Evelyn beckoned Bucky to join her this time and the pair danced around each other until Bucky playfully pinned Evelyn to the mat.
"Looks like I win," Bucky went to kiss her but Evelyn maneuvered her legs and had Bucky on his back and in a hold where he couldn't move.
"Oops," She looked at him with a grin.
Tony came into the training room and called for everyone to join a meeting for the next mission. Evelyn helped Bucky off the mat and the pair went to the meeting, hand in hand. When they didn't find seats next to each other, Bucky pulled Evelyn into his lap.
"There's a seat here, Shaw," Sam told her with a laugh.
"I'm good here, best seat in the house," She gave him a wink.
Tony reemerged and started telling the team about the next mission. Bucky's hand immediately went into the air.
"Are we doing partners again, cause I call dibs on Shaw," She reached back and smacked him lightly. "It worked out pretty well for me last time."
"But not for Shaw, she got shot," Sam shot at Bucky with a smirk.
"Nice, real nice Wilson," Evelyn gave Sam a glare and tried to keep Bucky in check, "He's just trying to be funny."
"It's not funny," Bucky mumbled.
Things went back to normal after that. The team went on missions and kept the world safe. S.H.I.E.L.D did try to recruit Evelyn for a higher ranking job after taking down both Pierce and the Power Broker but she turned it down, wanting to stay in the field and with the Avengers.
Bucky and Evelyn became permanent mission partners because one time Evelyn had gone off with Sam and came back with a dislocated shoulder. Bucky lost his mind. So after beating on Sam, no one else would team with Evelyn.
Nat had confided in Evelyn about her real feelings for Steve and Evelyn recruited Bucky into playing matchmaker for the two. He wasn't very good at it but was a good sport with helping her.
Bucky finally got to take Evelyn on vacation. The two spent a beautiful week locked in a cabin in the woods. They hardly left the bed and even if they did, neither was fully dressed. They fell more in love with each other, if possible. They danced in the kitchen at midnight, fed each other snacks as they watched movies and spoke of their future.
It was a beautiful life, dangerous but beautiful.
When Bucky had to go on a solo mission, Evelyn wasn't happy. When he missed his check in she became erratic. After a week of no contact, she threatened to go after him herself. The night she went to leave, Bucky walked through the doors of the compound, weathered and beaten and he fell into Evelyn's arms asking her one question before passing out.
"Marry me?" Bucky's eyes shut and she screamed for help.
Steve and Tony took Bucky to the medical lab and Evelyn paced outside, waiting for an update. Time passed too slowly. Steve let her know that she needed to get a mission report from Bucky as soon as he was awake but she didn't care about that. Finally, Bruce came out and said Bucky was asking for Evelyn.
Evelyn's leg bounced as she sat next to the hospital-like bed. His eyes were closed, his breathing even and she was sure he was asleep. She reached out and pushed some of his hair away from his eyes and he caught her hand.
"Evie?" Bucky's voice was raspy.
"It's me," She told him, "Steve said I had to," She hiccuped a cry.
"Hey, it's okay, I'm fine," His eyes shot open and he took in her state. She looked like she hadn't slept in days, she looked smaller if possible.
She shook her head at him and didn't believe what he was saying.
"Evie, come on, let's make Steve happy and then we can talk," Bucky reached out for her hand and she placed hers in it quickly.
"Okay," She used her other hand and wiped at the tears, "I need a mission report, Barnes."
Bucky went on to tell her about his mission, how it was screwed up from the start. He made comments about needing his eyes and ears with him and it wouldn't have been as bad. He told her about a new Hydra base that he was collecting recon on and how he was spotted. He missed his check ins because he was followed. He got into a few fights but came out the winner and left a small trail of Hydra agents in his wake.
"Will it ever end with Hydra? Evelyn asked.
"I wish I knew sweetheart," Bucky sighed, "Is that enough for the report?"
Evelyn nodded and stood up from her seat, kissing Bucky's forehead. "I'm so glad you're okay."
"Where were you going when I came in?" Bucky asked her.
"Um, what?" Evelyn tried to deflect, "You remember that?"
Bucky gave her a glare and asked again, "Where were you going Evelyn?"
She gulped back, hating that he used her full name. "What exactly do you remember?"
"We'll get to that, first tell me where you were going." Bucky tried to sit up from the bed.
"I was coming to find you," She nearly shouted, trying to get him to lay back down.
"Evie," Bucky let out a sigh. "Go up to our room, my side of the bed, under my book, you'll find it."
He fell asleep after that. Bruce kicked her out and she went to give Bucky's report to Steve and Tony. They immediately got to work. Evelyn went to the bedroom she now shared with Bucky and followed his instructions. She found a small box that seemed familiar. She almost opened it but stopped herself.
When she went back down to Bucky, he was trying to leave the lab. Evelyn promised he would take it easy and helped him leave.
"I don't want to go upstairs, let's go outside." Bucky looked at Evelyn and noticed the box in her hands. "You found it? Did you open it?
She shook her head but handed him the box. "What is it?"
They found the spot where they liked to sit together. They curled into one another and Bucky fiddled with the box.
"The only thing I could think of while I was out there was how to ask you," He started. "You know it's been a year soon, since we had our mission?"
She nodded along with him and let him talk.
"And when I didn't think I was going to make it home," He flipped open the box, "I just pictured you saying yes, wearing this ring, walking down the aisle to me. It was all I could think of."
"Bucky," She sighed and placed her hands on his.
"I love you so much sweetheart, I cannot picture my life without you. Everything I have ever done has led me to this moment, to this future, with you." Bucky took the ring from its box and held onto Evelyn's hand.
"Bucky," She gasped when she got a good look at the ring.
"Say yes, just say yes and we'll start the rest of our lives, right now." Bucky slid the ring on her finger.
She turned in his arms and kissed him deeply on the lips. His hands went up her back as they battled against each other.
She made his whole world complete with one word.
"Yes."
