20
Captain Kitty Hawk was glaring at the twins who were sitting calmly watching him with their tongues paused mid lick. The ice creams were melting slowly as they watched him pivot for another word or two of anger over their 'dalliance with death' as he adjusted the ears that slipped from the sudden movement and said "and what if one of you farted? Did you even think about mixing a gas with the oil? You could have exploded!"
Three year old Valentine was not slow… like his sister he had inherited the smartarse Harkness traits and he answered "you need a fire for a boom. Everyone knows about ignitionaters!"
"What?"
"Ignition. When a spark or flame created the chain reaction of an explosion" Jack said as he cradled a little cat who had little paws getting a gentle wash as the oil has been left a while "Like… the hammer of the gun hits the bullet… causes a small spark that gets the gunpowder ignited, causes the bullet to explode… the gun fires."
"A chain reaction" the Kat said slowly as he narrowed his eyes "So… if they had farted near the fire covered in that they could be bulleted out the window or something? Like… that could kill someone!"
OK.
That was too much and Ianto beat a retreat to the kitchen as he snorted and giggled, covering his mouth as he made a move for some kitchen towels for the dripping ice creams.
"Don't be a dickhead" Valentine said, then proceeded to go back to licking the ice cream.
Jenny was still interested and she turned to the other one listening "Jax? Would we really?"
"Nah. You might explode like a bomb like… splat!" the little boy threw his arms up, the ice-cream in his cone flying into Jack's lair.
Jack blinked as a blob of ice-cream slowly slid down his face.
Jill noticed that too, racing to her Hooman to help with the problem as she lamented to herself that these pups never really grow up, getting into mischief all the time. Jack sat with the dog licking his face, Ianto re-entering to pause, stare, gape and then turn expertly on his heel to leave just as quickly as he had in the first place.
Ton entered to find his father leaning face down over the table, screaming into his arms.
"Tad?"
Ianto didn't answer…couldn't really, just motioned in the direction of the other room, lifting his head as his tears flowed from the over exertion of the laugher. Ton saw the tears and took it the other way as he stormed in there to tear strips off them for upsetting his lovely Taddy.
He stared at the living room and it's madness, turned and left.
"Tad… Jill is eating Dad's face"
"Don't worry… he's kissed worse." Ianto sighed finally in control as he straightened up "But he is Not getting a kiss from me until after he has washed his face."
"Right."
Ton went back in to herd his father to the bathroom as he scolded and scrubbed at his face like he was one of the kids. Jack was so shocked he didn't even argue. Jill looked on with a snort of agreement.
Some pups never grow up ya know … get into trouble all the time.
