Hello! Sorry for the long gap between updates. I'm sorry I haven't updated my other stories in a long time, but I feel like I can make more progress with this story than I can with the others at the moment, and I see that allot of people like this story more than my others. I promise that I will update them, but it probably wont be for a long time. Anyway, I hope you really enjoy this chapter, I'm sorry that its a little shorter than the others, but I think it explains the situation pretty well!
Disclaimer : I do not own Twilight or TMNT, but the words are all my own! ;)
Bella's Point Of View
"I don't know how it got this bad" Leo said, holding his head in his hands. It had taken awhile, but eventually we had managed to help Leo open up a little, help him to realise that we weren't going to push him away.
"I was so angry at myself, I wasn't able to protect you. All of the screaming, the blood. It felt like there was no hope left." His voice was muffled slightly, and his shoulders were tense from stress. I could see that it was hurting his injury, which still hadn't healed properly, but I knew now wasn't the best time to worry about that. If I stopped Leo now, then I don't think he would open up so easily again. He needed to tell us now, when the pain was still fresh.
"There was no hope left, and when I saw the gauntlet strike down on Bella, I realised that we were going to die, that we were going to have to watch each other die, and not be able to reach out for any comfort. I hated the choice we had to make, but then again I took comfort from the fact that if we were going to die, then we had the power. Took comfort from the fact that we would, in the end, be controlling our fate. I can't tell you how happy and grateful I am to still be alive, but we had to be saved, and that felt like failure."
The way he said it, was so simple. It described how he felt, without going into the full details of what had happened. I could see from the looks on the others faces, that they understood the pain, that they clearly remembered the terror, and the sheer horror of witnessing the people you love screaming for saviour around you.
"Leo... none of that was your fault. We all witnessed what happened. We all experienced the self blame and the helplessness, but we survived. Bro, if we hadn't of been saved, we would have still been together in some form. All that astral plane stuff Master Splinter talks about must have some truth behind it." This, surprisingly came from Raph. We all looked at him, shocked. " What? Just because I don't meditate every minute of the day don't mean that I haven't thought about this type of thing." He grunted, looking towards the floor.
"Dude, Raph here kind of has a point. Though you may feel the responsibility lies only on your shoulders, we all have self blame for what happened. It was difficult for all of us to deal with, and we all thought that we were going to die. But again, we would have been together then, and we are still together now." Mikey said, looking directly at Leo. I was proud of Mikey. Even though he sometimes seemed childish, he still managed to come through and comfort those who needed it.
"Mikey's right Leo, we all have issues of our own. The thing is though, we've managed to draw comfort from the fact that we are still together. We've all opened up to each other about what happened, and doesn't it feel a little better now that you have told us what you feel?" Donnie asked, using his most comforting voice. What he said was true. All my brothers had shared their emotions with each other, all but Leo.
"I know, and it does feel better. I don't think I'm ready to talk about all that I'm feeling just yet, but you have all made me realise that sometimes I have to rely on you, and that I need your support." He looked around the room, his eyes shining slightly. He then looked directly at me "I'm sorry that it had to go to such extremes for me to realise that my self hatred and self blame wasn't only affecting me. I promise that I will never do something like that again." As he said this, a small tear rolled down his cheek. None of us had seen Leo cry for a long time, not since we were kids. The realisation of how much pain Leo was in struck our hearts.
I got up from the sofa as quickly as possible, and threw my arms around him. He wrapped his arms around me, clinging on to me like his life depended on it. And in a way it did, he had finally shared all the pain that was harbouring inside of him. Life had not been the same since that night, but now he could start to recover properly, and he saw that he had his family there to support him. I put one hand on the back of his head, stroking it softly as he began to sob. I didn't say anything to him, just gently shushed him, still stroking the back of his head and neck.
It wasn't long before the others joined us, wrapping their arms around both of us and crying silently. Leo had moved onto the floor while he was talking to us, and now we were all curled up around him, vowing that we would protecting him without uttering a single word.
Eventually Leo stopped crying, and relaxed in our arms. The others settled, and soon they were all asleep, their embraces never wavering. I could hear all of their heartbeats, a steady rhythm that lulled me into a state of complete contentment. This is where I belonged, and this is where I was going to stay.
I heard my phone ringing in the distance. Ever since I returned back home, I only used my old cell phone to receive calls from certain people. Whoever was calling, could wait for a little while until I was in a position to call them back, I was going to enjoy this moment with my brothers, because it was rare for a moment like this to occur. The last time I had fallen asleep in my brothers arms, and not have to worry about one of us being in serious danger, was when we were children, when we did not know the dangers of what was on the surface.
The caller did not let up though. Every time the phone stopped ringing, it would start up again in a matter of seconds. The sound was beginning to make my brothers stir, and I didn't want them to be disturbed just yet. I gently rolled Mikey off of me, so that he was leaning on Raph, and slipped out of Leo's arms. When it registered that I was no longer in his arms, he began searching for me in his sleep. This was one of the sweetest and saddest things I had ever seen, that my hero, my big brother was so broken on the inside that he needed me even when there was no danger. I leant forward quickly and kissed him on the forehead. "I'll be back in a second big brother" I whispered. As I walked out of the room, he was still searching for me, but not as much. I was only planning on being away from him for a short amount of time.
I entered the kitchen grabbed my cell as I slipped out the back door. I looked at the caller ID, and realised it was Charlie that was calling me.
"Charlie, nows not really a good time." I told him, glancing into the kitchen to see if any of my brothers had woken and followed me.
"I'm sorry Bella, but I thought that you would want to know this as soon as possible." He apologised, his voice quite strained. I frowned at this, what could have possibly have happened to make Charlie this worried?
"What's wrong?" I asked, bouncing on the balls of my feet. Though I knew that I was going to be fine, my muscles still ached from the ordeal last night. I didn't dare tell my brothers this, as they would never let me move again.
"The Cullen's came over earlier, asking about you." His tone darkened at this, and I knew exactly how he felt.
"What did they want?" I hissed.
"They wanted to know about your family, about your brothers. They asked me to tell them where you were, as they believe that you might be in danger. They also asked me to tell you your phone number"
"I assume that you told them that I wanted nothing to do with them? If they cared that much for my safety, then they would not have abandoned me!" I hissed in anger. How dare they assume that I was unsafe with my brothers. I was safer with my brothers than I could ever be with them.
"I told them that you did not wish for them to know where you were. I told them, no warned them, that they should leave you and your family alone. But the said that you were a member of their family, and that they wanted to protect you. They said that they would find you." Charlie sounded truly sorry as he said this.
"They will have a hard time finding me. I don't exactly live in a place thats easy to access. You can warn them again, if you see them again, that I know that they are looking for me, and that if they dare to try and take me away from my family, even their immortality will not save them from death" I knew that Charlie was shocked as I said this, and I was a little bit too. But I knew in my heart, in my soul, that I meant it. I would not risk loosing my family again, and I would not let a clan of people who broke my trust take me from them.
"Are you sure about this Bella?" Charlie asked. "I know what they are, and I have doubts about whether you would be able to stand against them. They are not normal people, that have speed and strength that you will never be able to match"
"I know how to deal with them, and I know what their weakness's are. I already have a theory of a way that would give me an advantage if it ever came to a fight. If you see them, tell them that is where I stand. Bye" I snapped the phone shut.
My chest was rising and falling. My anger was rising. I thought that they were out of my life. I thought that once I said goodbye to them, then I could continue my life with my brothers as normal. After seeing how broken they are, how much they need to be supported and comforted, there is no way I can risk being taken away from them. They needed to be part of a family, they needed me to be there for them. I had seen all four of my brothers, my idols and hero's, cry their pain onto my shoulder within the last hour.
These were the people that had raised and protected me throughout everything. I had grown up not knowing anything else in this world apart from them, they were my life. How could they ever think that I would choose them over the people who had done so much for me. How dare the Cullen's think that they would ever be able to replace them, be better for me than them.
I took a deep breath to calm myself, and walked back inside. I silently shut the door behind me, and turned my phone off and removed the sim card, I couldn't risk that the Cullen's might get hold of my number and trace it. I would dispose of the phone later. I would only be in contact with Charlie if I needed to be.
I returned to the living room, and my brothers had not moved from their positions. Leo's hand was still outstretched towards me, but it was no longer moving. I slowly slipped back into his arms, and rolled Mikey back into the position that he was in previously. They all stirred slightly, but they settled down again within a matter of seconds. If anything they all moved closer to each other, embracing me and Leo from all angles.
Leo opened his eyes for a second, only glancing at me, before kissing me on the cheek and falling asleep again. He looked more at piece now than I had seen him in a long time. They all did. I worried about all of them, but I knew that they were going to be okay, it may take some time, but we would get there eventually.
This is where I belong, and nothing was going to take me away from my family.
I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter! I know enjoyed writing it! I really do love this story, and I hope that you do to! Thank you for reminding me that I do have people out there who like to read my writing, and I will try to update more frequently. I have decided to focus on this story, so my other stories have been put on hold until this story has been completed.
Thank you all for reading!
Love Pingu xxxxxx
