Penny playing D&D

In 4A a few days later, the guys are setting up to play D&D.

Sheldon is in his spot, of course, Character sheet, dice and pencils arrayed neatly in front of him. Leonard is running the game and has his DM screen out ready.

Raj is on the other end of the Sofa and Howard is in the chair by the door.

Sheldon seems amused by Leonards nervous preparations "I'm glad Lesley let you out to play with us tonight."

"Why's that Sheldon?"

"oh, She hasn't started accidentally scheduling events to clash with things so you have to choose between her and friends yet?"

"Hey, She wouldn't do that!"

"Of course not. Though tell her that as long as she doesn't I won't ask for the extra mainframe time back. " he smiles smugly.

Penny comes in, casually dressed in a loose check shirt and jeans. Unusually she's got a folder under one arm. She slides carefully into the sofa between Sheldon and Raj , grateful for the extra cushion he's left her. She kisses Sheldon on the cheek "Hey Honey" and snuggles up close to him.

Howard grins "Aha! so that's why you wouldn't let me sit there. So Penny, I hear you took Sheldon out dancing, what was that like?"

"oh, fun but he totally hustled me at pool"

" oh really, did he make you pay a forfeit?" He wiggles his eyebrows

"I'm here aren't I?"

Sheldon looks even smugger "I've invited Penny to play D&D with us"

Penny starts getting papers from her Hello Kitty folder "I've even got a character made, she is a elven ranger, not like the weird one who falls for dwarves, more a female Legolas. Sheldon helped me make her last night"

"I bet he did"

"Well, it's not all we did" She laughs "Her names Glincalen"
Sheldon stage whispers to her "They don't speak Sindarin"

"Oh. it means Green eyed"

She hands the papers to Leonard "here you go, Sheldon said you were all 8th level?"

Leonard reads them over quickly "Looks fine. but erm you sure you want to play?"

"Leonard sweetie, I used to run the number one raiding guild on my Conan server, this is just like that with but with you and dice instead of the computer to see if things work out, right?"

Leonard shrugs "yeah, kind of"

Sheldon leans close and whispers in her ear "I got you a surprise, hold out your hand"

"What, here?" she asks, but holds out her hand

"I got you your own dice." He puts a bag in her hand, purple velvet closed with a thick golden drawstring.

She opens it and pours them out into her palm. It's a double set, two of each of the polyhedral dice, all a matching Deep green swirled with golden speckles

"I recalled what you said about compliments and colours"

Howard interjects, "it's complementary colours Sheldon, ones that go together."

"I know what I said" To Penny he says "I chose them because they go with your eyes."

Howard whistles "oh, Smoooooth"

Raj is looking more and more worried. He motions and whispers to Howard, who agrees "How's Raj going to play with Penny here?"

Sheldon picks up a brown paper bag from the side of the sofa and passes it to Penny, who winks and passes it to Raj "Here you go, this should help"

Raj opens it and pulls out two bottles of beer. He grins, things are already looking up.

Leonard sets the scene. "Ok, so we have Sheldon's wizard, Penny's ranger, Raj's Cleric and Howard's Rogue. The villagers of a small hamlet have asked you to save them from a pack of wolves that have been terrorizing them."

Penny looks bemused "Hamlet? is that a real place, not a Prince of Denmark?"

Sheldon enjoys explaining "In medieval times a Hamlet is a settlement smaller than a village, usually without a church. They often with a single main occupation, for example all working in the same mine or farm"

Leonard continues "So that night you set off into the woods with flaming torches"

Sheldon "Keep close, wolves get bonuses to trip and outflank attacks so they may attack from the sides as well."

Howard leans over to Penny . "So Leggy lass, what do your green elf eyes see?"

"I've a longbow you know. and I have Lowlight vision so if the moon is out I can see as clear as day"

Sheldon thinks a moment then says "Vision is a good point, if poorly made. I cast unseen servant and have it carry my torch, so both my hands are free to cast spells"

Raj suddenly looks worried "Wolves and the moon! it's not a full moon is it?" then covers his mouth and looks at Penny. "Hee hee gaming beers is a good idea"

Leonard rolls some dice and shakes his head "No, that's in 4 days"

Penny looks at Sheldon "It could be werewolves?"

he shakes his head "Doubtful, a pack would have razed the hamlet with ease. Only those infected by a bite have to change on the full moon, lycanthropes who were born that way can change at any time. Though to be careful, I have a silver dagger and some fresh belladonna in my bag of holding"

"OK, I'll carry my bow with an arrow ready, I have the Quick draw feat so I can drop my bow, draw my sword and still fight in the same action"

"from the darkness you hear the growl of approaching wolves"

Penny grins "cool, How many can I see?"

Leonard rolls dice "You can see five"

Sheldon nods "remember what I said about flank attacks, there may be more"

Raj panics "I ready my mace and shield!"

Howard joins in "I ready my crossbow and hide behind Raj!"

Sheldon presses his fingertips together, intent "If you can lure them together into a group one fireball should get them all"

Penny pauses "Hold on, Wolves don't normally attack people, right?"

Sheldon shakes his head " No, like most animals they are of true neutral by alignment."

"So something changed that made them come out of the forest. Do we know what? "

Raj is now one gaming beer down and starting to loosen up "Oh, vampires can control wolves. or they could be dire wolves! they're evil and love slaughter!"

Howard impatiently rattles his dice "Hurry up and let's get to killing them!"

Penny holds up a hand "Hold on, I cast 'speak with animals' and ask them why they came out of the forest"

Leonard stops, nonplussed for a moment, then rolls dice behind his screen "They say they're hunting for food as an ogre has come down from the hills and scared away all the game animals in the forest."

Penny smiles proudly "There you go"

Howard grins "well done! you found the boss fight, and ogres have treasure! !"

"Ask if they'll not attack if we feed them"

"feed them? a pack of wolves?!"

Leonard shrugs "Well, their main motivation is hunger so" rolls dice "yes. "

Sheldon produces his equipment list. "I have two months trail rations in my bag of holding, that would include dried meat and hard biscuits."

"They won't trust dried meat."

"I also have a cauldron, we can rehydrate it."

"you want to make Stew for wolves?" Leonard rolls then sighs "Fine, but you have no water"

Raj checks his spell list "Oh, Oh! I can cast create water and fill his cauldron"

"ok, you fill the cauldron with water, but it's cold water"

"If we gather wood I can use Tensers floating disc to suspend the cauldron over a fire"

Raj grins "Ah! I cast heat metal on the cauldron!" he waves his hands "I'm cooking for wolves!"

Leonard puts his head in his hands "Ok, you make stew and feed the wolves"

Howard gloats "Let's kill the wolves now! hit them while they're eating, That way I get a sneak attack bonus! "

Penny bristles" No killing the wolves!

"I'm Chaotic, it's what I do"

"It's just an excuse to be rude"

"But we don't get any experience points this way." Howard whines

Sheldon raises a finger and points out "I'd argue we do, our mission was to stop the attacks not explicitly kill the wolves, I'd argue we've done that. "

Leonard sighs "Yeah you still get experience"

Penny grins "Great, Let's get them to lead us to the Ogre!"

"Ok, they take you to the Ogres cave"

Penny sits up and takes charge "Ok, who sorts your combats?" They all look sheepish and shrug

Howard patronisingly explains "we usually just got in initiative order and do as much damage as we can"

"well, let's have some sort of Plan. Sheldon Honey, what spells are you packing?

"I have Fireballs and lightning bolts for direct damage and a few utility spells"

"Ok, so Howard you have a crossbow and Raj you're mostly melee?" they nod. "Ok, so Howard, if you creep forward and hide by the side of the cave entrance, Me and Raj and the wolves can stand in the clearing in front of the cave with Sheldon behind us and to one side. That way we can lure it out, when it comes forward Howard can sneak attack it and Sheldon has a clear shot to blast it. The we all charge in to finish it off! sound good?"

They all look back and forth, impressed. "sounds good to us"

"We just need to find a way to attract it's attention"

Sheldon smiles a lopsided grin "I know just the thing. Leonard, propagation of a force between a confined space and an open space? "

Leonard straightens his glasses "what's your idea, Sheldon?"

"If I cast a fireball as far as I can see into the cave, won't the fire fill the cave and travel back down any tunnels?"

"well, half of it will. the other half will come back towards you"

"but as we're in a clearing it'll spread out and rapidly dissipate, agreed?"

"agreed"

"So when we're ready I'll fireball the cave and draw the ogre out"

Howard grins evilly "I sneak into position!"

"When he's ready I'll cast fireball"

Leonard has an evil grin as he rolls dice behind his screen, he's remembering why he enjoys being GM. "ok, Howard you sneak into position, give me a hide check. Penny, Raj and Sheldon you're in the clearing. Sheldon, you cast fireball, you watch the point of fire shoot down into the darkness of the cave and explode into a blossom of flame!" he rolls dice " you hear a roar of pain and anger, followed by a second roar and the sounds of something big thundering up out of the cave"

Raj looks worried " two ogres?"

"A giant misshapen humanoid bursts from the cave, smouldering. it's shaped like a man but 13 feet tall and has two ugly heads and a huge spiked club in each hand"

Howard gasps "Two heads!?"

Sheldon shrieks "Ettin!"

Penny laughs "I guess that's worse than an ogre?" he nods "Much worse!". "Well, let's stick to the plan!"

Raj panics "I don't want to die!"

Penny turns to him and punches him in the arm "Come on, You've got your armour and your faith in Pelor the sun god!"

Raj shakes his head "Remember I'm the only healer ! "

" Don't worry, if you get hurt just step back and heal yourself, we'll keep it off you "

Leonard says "well, you have a free surprise round before you have to roll initiative"

Sheldon gathers his dice. "Ok, let's fry this two headed miscreant! I cast Lightening bolt" he rolls a handful of six sided dice, adds them up and looks worried. "Oh, that's not good. only 15 points, significantly below average"

"I sneak attack with my crossbow! I've a clear shot at the back of his neck, come on Sneak Attack" he rolls... they all stare at the dice showing a 1. He smacks himself on the forehead howling "Noooooo!"

They look at Penny, who rolls her d20 "Come on, let's go Vegas with the longbow! 12. plus my 11. is 23 a hit?" Leonard nods "Yup!" and she grins "so 4 points from an arrow from me!"

Raj looks over his character sheet, frantic for a cunning plan "aha! I drink my potion of strength!" and waves his second beer bottle.

Leonard checks his notes "Ok, the Ettin, for it is indeed an Ettin, comes to its senses after being ambushed. As it can't see Howard behind him and hasn't been hurt by him he only knows about you in front. It can't get to Sheldon without going through Penny and Raj so it'll charge you two. Roll initiative" the clatter of dice.

"Ok, it goes first, charging forward like a mountain of muscle with an iron mace in each hand. As it has two heads it gets two full attacks, it hits Penny for 12 and Raj for 14! Sheldon, you're up next"

Sheldon flusters "I could use magic missile into melee as it never misses, so there is no risk of friendly fire. But to aid my allies in combat I think this will be most effective. Raj, I cast Enlargen on you"

Raj goes wide eyed "I am A GIANT!"

"What are you doing? "

"I smite it with my mace!" Dice are rolled and confusion reigns for a few moments, Leonard has to get out a notepad and does some quick addition; "ok, you're one size larger so your AC is down 2 but your weapons are one dice class higher and the +4 str is +2 to hit and damage so you hit it back for... 12 points!"

"Penny, what are you doing?"

"I'm going to call on the wolves to help and attack with my sword!"

"ok, roll for Wild Empathy and your attack".

"ok, you hit it for 5 and the wolves join in, hitting it for 3 and 5 as well"

"Howard, what are you doing?"

"as it's already fighting I can get another sneak attack can't I?"

"yes, as long as you outflank it"

"Ok, draw my stabbing daggers and charge! I'll leap onto it's back and stab it!"

"Ok, that's a hit for... wow, 13 points!"

The combat rages for several more rounds, everyone is battered and bloody and low on hit points when the Ettin finally falls, skull crushed by a lucky critical hit from Raj's mace.

"Yes!" they all cheer and high five.

Howard immediately dives into the cave to look for treasure while Penny argues with Raj and Sheldon over healing the injured wolves.

"But Penny, they're only NPCs, and animal NPCs at that!"

"They fought with us, they deserve healing!"

"Come on. You're lawful good. I'm chaotic good. Never cruel or cowardly, right?!"

Leonard stops and looks over his glasses at Sheldon "You been showing her Dr Who?"

Sheldon smiles to himself as Penny replies "Sure, my favourite doctor so far is Ten. The Old shows are weird and cheesy but the new stuff is cool"

"Come on Raj, let's build a wolf army! "

"Ok, Ok, Cure light wolves!"

Dividing the Ogres treasure horde

Later

"Howard! while magic rings do change size to fit their wearer, the rules Specify they have to be worn on your FINGER"

"But It'd be a sneak attack! No one would suspect!"

"it says "A ring is a circular metal band worn on the finger", If you wanted to do that it'd need to be a specially crafted as Wondrous Item (jewellery)"

"Oh, come on!"

"Ok, ok, I'll let you take it as a custom feat"

Sheldon frowns "I must protest!"

"Come on, it's my game. and , Well, monkey grip sets the precedent, allowing a high strength character to use a two handed sword one handed. And the hand of glory trades an amulet for a third ring slot. So a highly dextrous character can take Howards feat to wear a ring elsewhere, as long as he doesn't break the two ring limit.

"I'll take it as my next feat, I'll call it Ring Master!"

"What ring are you wearing?"

"The Ring of the Ram! "

Penny covers her face, laughing herself red in the face "I never thought I'd see a Halfling dry hump a castle drawbridge to pieces..."

Packing up after Howard and Raj have gone, Sheldon passes Penny a copy of the Dungeon Masters guide, open on the Rings page.

"I do hope Leonard remembers this section..."

Penny reads the bits Sheldon points out " The ring of the ram is an ornate ring forged of hard metal, usually iron or an iron alloy. It has the head of a ram as its device... A newly created ring has 50 charges. When all the charges are expended, the ring becomes a non-magical item."

She looks puzzled "So? it'll limit Howards fun, it'll run out of charges"

Sheldon nods "and become a normal non-magical ring. As it loses its magical powers I'd assume it turns back to a normal SIZE finger ring"

Penny winces then bursts out laughing. "Ok, I've got to keep playing just to see the look on his face when that happens!"

Sheldon smiles "I'm glad you enjoyed tonight. "

She wraps her arms around his neck "it was great just to hang around with you guys and watch you geek out and have fun with you"