Chapter 9

"Hey. Good morning."

"Yeah, morning."

Jay watched as Erin took off her jacket and sat down at her desk, avoiding eye contact. He noticed it as soon as Erin came in. He didn't even have to try very hard. Nearly a year of being close to Erin as her partner and months of being even closer to her as something more allowed Jay to read her body language easily like a fifth grade textbook.

Something was bothering her.

His first thought went to the confrontation a couple of nights ago in front of the station with one of the sleaziest looking guy he'd ever seen. Erin still hadn't confided in him whatever Charlie had told her that night but one thing was for sure, whatever Charlie said left her rattled.

Jay had wanted to ask her about Charlie. He wanted to know Erin's history with him or what she reacted like she did as soon as she heard Platt say Charlie's name. But they had been busy and swept up with Pulpo drama and picking up the slack as Antonio recovered from his gunshot wound. Jay chided himself for not checking in with Erin sooner. He was her partner. No, he was more than that. He was her friend. He should've been looking out for her.

"Alright, we're rolling out," Voight announced as he came out of his office, breaking up the celebratory greeting for Antonio's return to work. "Five minutes. We caught a heater."


"They had a plan. They took out all the security cameras in the area," Jay divulged to the group what he had found out at the scene of the crime.

"They're missing 100 pounts of the aluminized water gel explosives," Olinksy added as the group gathered at the construction site. It was freezing and Jay snuck his hands into his leather jacket to keep warm.

"Water gels?" Kevin asked, a little green since it was his first day in the unit. Jay didn't really have a preference to who between Atwater and Burgess got pulled up to Intelligence. In his eyes, they were both solid cops and either of them would've been a good choice. But in the end, Voight had made the decision to call up Kevin and Jay heard rumblings of the reason being that Voight had thought something was going on between Ruzek and Burgess and everyone knew Voight's opinion on in-house relationship.

On one hand, Jay was annoyed that Voight seemed to be making decisions for the unit based on his personal opinion. Shouldn't how good of a cop you were be the only thing that mattered in decisions like this? Instead of who Burgess chose to spend her time with off the clock?

Then on the other, there was a part of Jay that was slightly relieved that it wasn't just his and Erin's relationship that Voight disapproved of. That the reason why Voight was so vehemently against him and Erin being together wasn't because Voight's dislike of Jay. that Voight had the same standards for every other cop in his unit.

Jay was still surprised that Voight had reached out to him that night with Pulpo on the docks. Jay had been sure that he would be fired after stopping Voight and O from getting their vigilante justice. But instead, Voight had done the opposite and left Jay reeling, especially when Voight divulged that it was Erin who had made him see reason.

Jay directed his attention to Erin. She looked so small in the group of men and she was shivering, unable to handle the frigid weather. However, that wasn't anything new. Erin hated the cold. But Jay could see that the low temperature wasn't the only reason why she looked off. Distracted and occupied, barely paying attention to the case at hand. His concern grew for his partner. Something was really wrong.

"Hey you okay?" he asked as the rest of the group headed toward another scene. It was the first alone time he had gotten with her this morning.

She bristled at his question, like she was so caught up in her own thoughts that she didn't notice him there. "Yeah, fine," she mumbled, waving his question away as she sped up to catch up to the rest of the group.

Jay watched the back of her head, his brows furrowing. Why was it so hard for her to open up and tell him what was wrong? He sighed, shaking his head, wondering if there would ever be a day if Erin would be open enough to tell him whatever that was going on in her head.


"So how do the two of you know each other?"

Jay and Mouse exchanged glances at Ruzek's question, smiles crossing both of their faces.

"Let's just say Halstead here has saved my ass more times than I can count," Mouse replied, patting Jay's shoulder.

Adam frowned. "That doesn't really answer my question."

"It wasn't supposed to," Jay snarked, always loving to get a jab in with Ruzek. Adam flipped him off at his reply and Jay chuckled. "Come on, let's just do this thing."

He and Adam followed Mouse to the sketchy looking building, not knowing what exactly they were walking into. But Jay trusted Mouse. What Mouse said earlier about Jay saving his ass? It went both ways. Jay didn't think he'd be standing here today, doing the job he loved, if it wasn't for Mouse.

"This better pan out, man," Adam commented as they began climbing up the stairs. Mouse just turned around and rolled his eyes.

Jay heard Ruzek's phone chimed and he pulled it out to read the text, chuckling at the content.

"What is it?" Jay asked.

"Ah, Burgess. She got a sleeping beauty," Adam replied, holding up his phone so Jay could see the picture that Kim sent of a cop falling asleep on the job.

Jay's eyebrow rose. "Burgess, huh?"

"Just get your head in the game."

"Okay, Pards," Jay shot back, sarcastically, finding it ironic that Adam was the one telling him that. Jay studied the rookie cop from the side of his eyes, wondering how in the world it was so easy for Adam to move on so quickly. His engagement was broken not even a month ago and here he was, flirting and doing whatever it was he was doing with Kim.

It was a far cry from Jay who was still hopelessly stuck on Erin. The kicker was Erin was never even his girlfriend, let alone fiancee. Sometimes, Jay wished he could be like Adam in this regard. Move on and forget about Erin instead of holding out hope that maybe one day things would be different for them. Hope that seemed to be dwindling with each passing day.

"How well do you know these guys, Mouse?" Ruzek asked after they entered the unknown unit.

"I don't know," Mouse shrugged. "How well does anybody know anybody, you know?"

"That's not that helpful."

Jay just snickered to himself at the exchange, waiting for the guy that Mouse took them to see to show up.

"What do we got?" Jay turned his head at the incoming voice, coming to a still as he was met with the face of Charlie.

The two of them stood face to face, neither of them moving. Jay tried to keep the shock and emotions off his face, to keep that stoic look intact. He couldn't screw this up before it started.

"You're looking for some stuff I can get for you," Jay began, hoping that Charlie wouldn't recognize who he was.

"Stuff? Like what exactly?"

"Blasting caps. Det cord."

Charlie's voice was hard to read as he coolly replied, "why would I need something like that?"

Jay kept his cool just the same. "Hey, what you do with it is your business, right?"

The two of them were in a stand-off, neither of them giving anything away. To the side, Mouse and Adam stood watching, not daring to say a word.

"Really, detective? Would it be my business?" Charlie spoke, finally breaking the stand-off by letting Jay know that he knew exactly who Jay was.

"Detective? What you talking about, CHarlie?" Mouse chimed in, trying to salvage the sting but it was too late.

"Shut up, Mouse," Charlie barked before turning to Jay again. "We met at the station with Erin Lindsay, or did you forget?"

"No, I definitely wouldn't forget something like that." Jay stepped closer, getting in his face. "Is there anything you want to tell us, Charlie?"

Jay wanted to wipe the smirk on Charlie's face, preferably with his fists. "Nope. I'm super cool, man." A sly smirk crossed Charlie's face as he stared Jay down. "Tell Erin I said hey though."

Jay felt his blood boil at Charlie bringing up Erin's name but he tried to keep it cool. Charlie was needling him on purpose by mentioning Erin. "Back in the day, she was mmm, something," Charlie continued sleazily.

It took every ounce of strength Jay had not to lay Charlie out right here, right now. The smarmy tone and the insinuation pissed Jay off. But someway, somehow Jay managed to keep his cool and just chuckled back at Charlie, not letting the other man see that he got under Jay's skin.

"What the hell was that?" Adam asked as they made their way outside. Jay was still fuming and walking fast, Mouse and Adam trying to keep up with his fast pace.

"Just like he said, I met him with Lindsay," Jay replied.

"I'm so made, man," Mouse whined.

"Relax, Mouse, I got you on this," Jay reassured his friend. There was no way he would let Charliet hurt anyone he cared about.

"Okay, what's our next play here?"

"I don't know yet," Jay replied distractedly, not caring about answering Ruzek's question. The only thing that was on his mind was to talk to Erin and get to the bottom of just who CHarlie Pugliese was and just what he was capable of.


"Charlie Pugliese, or however you say his freaking name, you know what he's into?" he asked Erin as soon as they got into the rollup, away from prying eyes and ears.

Erin looked at him, confused and lost. "Why?"

"I just had a CI sit me down in front him. He's involved in the construction site hit."

Jay watched Erin carefully as she took in the info and watched it hit her hard. She fell back against the wall, resting her weight on it like she could no longer stand. There were so many emotions that played across her face— confusion, realization, worry, and most importantly, fear.

"Oh," was the only sound she could make— the lone syllable sounding so small and scared.

Jay's frustration and anger from earlier vanished at the sight of seeing her like this. His body deflated, his fighting stance gone. "What do you need here, Erin?"

"I can handle it."

Jay's jaw worked at her answer. "Really? How? When?" he shot back, wanting to hear just exactly how she planned on handling this. Because right now, Erin looked like she was in completely over her head. "Voight's upstairs. He's waiting for an update."

Erin crossed her arms as she pleaded with him, "Just stall. I just need to move a couple of things around."

"What does this guy have on you?" he asked straight out.

Fear flooded Erin's eyes as she looked at him. "It's bad," she whispered, finally admitting what Jay had suspected all along. Charlie was bad news.

Jay sighed, his mind running to see how he could help Erin out. What was he supposed to do right now to get Erin out of this mess unscathed? "What's Voight always say? Tell him the truth so he can lie for you?"

Erin shook her head. "No. If I tell the truth on this one, I'm done. Do you understand?"

Jay just met Erin's eyes. "There's a dead security guard that they left behind the dumpster. Like a bag of trash." Erin deflated as his words hit her and she leaned back against the wall. Jay knew her. He knew that Erin could never let whoever killed the innocent man get away with it. Whatever Charlie was involved with had gotten an innocent person killed. No matter how much Erin wanted to save her own ass, Jay knew it was something she could never let Charlie get away with. His instincts were proven right when Erin sighed and she looked at Jay, nodding.

Jay stood up from where he was sitting and placed a hand on her shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze. "It'll be okay," he whispered, trying to comfort her. He'd make sure of it.


Adam looked at him in disbelief, like he couldn't understand what Jay was asking of him.

"So let me get this straight, we're supposed to lie to Voight, our boss, about what happened with that sleazebag earlier?" Jay nodded. "Why? Why can't we just tell him that our cover got blown because of Lindsay?"

"Don't bring up Lindsay's name in this." Jay stressed.

Adam bit his lips, looking unsure. Jay knew that he was asking a lot of Adam here. Adam was new, fresh out of the academy and was still trying to prove himself. Hiding intel from Voight was pretty much asking Adam to risk his new career. But Adam must've seen the desperation on Jay's face because he just sighed and ran his fingers through his blond hair, messing it up even further.

"Fine!" Adam grunted. "I'll keep my mouth shut."

Jay patted Adam's chest as a thank you gesture. Now Jay felt bad about snapping at him earlier. But he had to hand it to Adam for actually calling him out and demanding respect. One that was long overdue, Jay had to admit.

"Awesome!"

"But if we get our asses handed to us by Voight because our, I mean your, CI didn't pan out?"

"I'll take the blame," Jay insisted. "100%."

Adam looked at him peculiarly for a second before just shrugging. "It's your ass on the line, man. Good luck," he said before walking away.

Jay let out a sigh as he watched Adam walk back to the bullpen before heading to the locker room himself. He found Erin sitting on the bench, chewing on her nail, a nervous habit of hers.

"Talked to Ruzek," Jay told Erin. "He's gonna keep his mouth shut." What was meant to be reassuring to Erin instead had the opposite effect on her. The lines on her forehead got deeper as she took in what Jay said to her. He sat down next to her and took her hand in his, caressing her soft skin with his thumb. "What's wrong?"

"This is my mess, Jay," Erin stated. "You shouldn't be involved with this. Neither should Ruzek."

"We have each other's back, no matter what," Jay pointed out. They were partners and while this wasn't completely by the books, Jay knew there wasn't anything he wouldn't do for Erin.

She tossed him a look. "Not like this. This is a huge mess, Jay. One that I don't even know how far it goes. The only thing I know for sure is that Charlie and his crew? They're capable of doing anything to get what they want."

"What are they after?" Jay asked, knowing that Erin had at least an inkling of just what Charlie wanted and why his crew hit up the construction site. He just hoped that Erin would finally let him in. He gave her hand a squeeze. "Hey, Erin. Look at me. Whatever it is, we can figure this out."

Erin held his gaze briefly before dropping her eyes back down to the floor. "I screwed up," she began. "Like I said, he has something on me and my friend. Something huge. He's holding it over us."

"What does he want from you?"

"He wanted a blueprint," Erin admitted, squeezing her eyes shut. "Of a jewelry exchange on North Lawndale." Jay processed the information. The schematics for the jewelry shop plus the explosives stole from the site….it could only mean one thing.

"They're planning on knocking off the exchange," Jay stated matter-of-factly. Erin nodded. "Erin."

"I know, I know. We can't let this happen," Erin spoke, voicing Jay's thoughts.

"Did you give him the blueprint yet?"

Erin shook her head. "No, Jin pulled it for me, off the book, but I still haven't given it to Charlie yet. Still debating what to do." She turned to Jay and her eyes pleaded with him. "What do I do, Jay?"

At this moment, all Jay wanted was to find a way to get Erin out of this mess. He hated seeing the troubled look on her face, like everything was weighing down on her. He wished he had all the answers to give her. "You got to tell Voight," Jay replied.

"I was hoping you'd say anything but that," Erin said, letting out a small but humorless laugh.

"It all comes down to this. Can you live with yourself knowing that you're gonna let Charlie pull this off? Or let his crew get away with killing an innocent man who was just doing his job?"

The answer was clear before Erin even said it out loud. "I'll talk to Voight," Erin replied, standing up. "If I no longer have a job after talking to him? Well, it's been nice being your partner."

Jay gave her a small grin at her attempt at a joke before pulling Erin in for a hug, tucking her head underneath his chin. "Can't get rid of me that easily from your life, Lindsay," he whispered, earning a chuckle from his partner. He pulled away but kept Erin at arm's length, gripping her shoulders. "It'll be okay. You just got to pull the bandaid off."

"Pull the bandaid off," Erin repeated. She let out a deep sigh. "Wish me luck."

"Luck," he whispered as Erin gave him one last look before heading off to find Voight.

As soon as Erin exited the locker room and he was alone, Jay deflated. He had been trying to put on a strong front for Erin but deep down, he wasn't sure that it would work out completely. He wanted to kill Charlie and whoever else that was in his crew. For killing a man. For pulling Erin into this mess.

He rubbed his face, feeling like his hands were handcuffed. There was nothing he could do to help. Not unless they had more information on just who else was in Charlie's crew or who was really in charge and stopping them before they could go through with their plans.


Jay sat at his desk, trying hard not to stare too much inside Voight's office. Erin was inside, probably telling Voight everything that was going on with her. Jay couldn't see her face or even see too much but the unhappy look on Voight's face was clear evidence enough of what was going on inside.

"I need a couple of clean-cut white guys," Kevin announced to the group as he put on jacket. "You got any white guys in the house?"

"What's the play?" Jay asked, ignoring the banter between the other guys. His mind was way too occupied to be entertained by Ruzek's usual quips.

"The kid's got a sit-down with Copeland Briggs," Al filled them in.

"Gonna run a game on him. See what he knows about the robbery," Kevin added.

Jay jumped up from his seat and immediately grabbed his jacket. "Hit it," he said eagerly, almost running out of the bullpen to meet with Copeland Briggs. Finally there was something he could do. The sooner they ended this, the better.

They arrived at the location of the meeting, Kevin taking charge since it was his connection that came through that got them the sit down. They followed Kevin's friend to the back room where Copeland Briggs was at, looking at the group of them coolly.

Jay stood silently as Kevin tried to pull his game with the guy.

"All right? Now these are a couple of uh…." Kevin continued, pointing to Jay and Adam.

"Cops," Jay interjected, slamming his badge on the table. "We're all cops." He stared down at one of Briggs' lackeys. "I think you're in my chair. Why don't you get up?"

He had no idea what took over him or why he suddenly went off the script. All he knew was that the longer Kevin and his friend stammered their way through their cover, the longer it was taking to get the information they needed. Jay was frustrated and his patience was wearing thin.

He could feel the disbelief stares from his team from the side and he ignored them all. Instead he focused on Briggs who was looking at him like he was the craziest white boy he'd ever laid his eyes on.

"We'd like to know about the construction site robbery," Jay surged on, not letting the other man intimidate him.

"And? What's in it for me?" Briggs shot back.

"Nothing!" Jay sassed, a smirk appearing on his face. "So how about we let the school around the corner get out, let all the kids fly by and they can see cops just kicking it with Copeland Briggs. Maybe later we'll get a 12 pack, bring it by your place and let everyone know that you're a CI at best," Jay continued. "Or you just tell us what we want right now and we'll be out of here in 30 seconds."

A couple of minutes later with the information from Briggs in hand, they made their way back to the station.

"You got some balls, Halstead," Adam commented as they drove back.

"Yeah that was some bullshit," Kevin added. "You went completely off the script man."

"It paid off didn't it?"

Adam and Kevin exchanged glances and just shook their head, not completely happy with what Jay did.

When they got back to the station, Al pulled Jay back as the other two headed up to the bullpen.

"What's up O?" Jay asked, wondering why Al was pulling him to the side.

"You okay kid?"

Jay just nodded. "Fine. Let's just get this case solved." Jay tried to head back but Al just held him back. "What?" Jay asked annoyed by Al wasting their time.

"Keep your cool, kid," Al advised. "We're all eager to solve this but don't let emotions get in your way and mess with your head. No matter who is involved."

Al gave him one last knowing look— like the older man knew exactly just why Jay was being hot-headed about this and for whom— before he made his way back to the station. Jay rubbed his forehead, wondering when he became so damn easy to read.


That night they finally snagged Charlie and his crew just as they were about to rip off the jewelry exchange, just like Erin said.

Jay watched with satisfaction as Al slammed Charlie on the hood of the car, putting the cuffs on him. Finally, Charlie was going down.

"I'd like to report a murder from October 12, 2002," Charlie suddenly shouted. "Victim's name was Ricky Sandoval. I have all the information. Who killed him and who helped get rid of the body."

Jay glanced over at Erin, wondering if this was what Charlie had on her. There was no emotion on Erin's face as she stood a few feet away. Her jaw was set and she didn't give Charlie the reaction he was looking for.

"Put him in the car," Voight ordered as Charlie was put in the back seat of the squad car.

Jay just knew that they were in for a long night.


"You knew what Sandoval was doing to Annie. You know why she snapped."

"It's too late for all that. I gave you a chance to keep it buried."

"And you want to go public about everything? Fine. But just so you know I'm gonna say I killed Sandoval, to keep Annie and Travis together."

Jay's blood ran cold as soon as he heard Erin say those words. He looked at Voight, wondering if they were just gonna stand by and do nothing while Erin took the blame for someone else's crime. Because there was no way Jay was going to let that happen.

Jay had expected Voight to look as worried and angry as he did but there was nothing but a blank look on his Sergeant's face.

"Are we really letting this go on?" Jay asked, frustrated as to why Voight wasn't going into the interrogation room and getting Erin away from the thug.

"You let Voight ran me out of town!" Jay heard Charlie yell. "With nothing. Nothing!"

Erin didn't even flinch. Instead she shot back, "You were headed for the bottom of the lake. I begged for your life. Do something with it. For once."

Jay clucked his tongue, watching the scene in front of him, his frustrations boiling over.

"She met Charlie when she was 15," Voight suddenly spoke. "He was 25."

Jay looked at Voight. "She was living on the streets then?"

Voight nodded. "You can only imagine what a 25 year old man wanted with a 15 year old girl from the streets." The implications behind Voight's sentence were loud and clear. Jay fisted his hands, his blood boiling over what Charlie had done to Erin. Jay wasn't stupid. He knew from the moment that he knew of Charlie, he could only assume just what kind of role the older man played in Erin's life. But it was still jarring to hear Voight pretty much confirmed Jay's suspicion.

"Bastard," Jay cussed.

"Bastard is too kind to describe him. But Erin, she was loyal to him. Can't really blame her. She was homeless, cold and hungry and he put food on the table and kept the heat on."

"But we all know that there's no such thing as a free lunch in the world."

"Hard for Erin to see it at the time though," Voight continued. "He got her hooked on dope, strung her and Annie along and had them do his biddings. Manipulated them into doing all sorts of things for him and for the people he owed money to."

"He belongs in a jail cell," Jay gritted out.

"He belongs at the bottom of a lake," Voight corrected. For once, Jay found himself completely agreeing with Voight. Jay couldn't entirely be sure that if Charlie was in Pulpo's position a month prior— with the chains around his neck, on his knees at the dock— that Jay could resist the urge to give the bastard one good kick and drop him in Lake Michigan.

"But Erin didn't want that to happen?" Jay asked even though he already knew the answer.

"Erin's loyalty may be her biggest fault," Voight commented. Jay looked at Voight then over at Erin then back to Voight.

"She's loyal, especially to people that don't deserve it," Jay spoke, looking at Voight. Voight met his gaze and Jay held it, the implication that Jay thought Voight was one of the undeserved went unsaid.

But it was the truth, Jay's true thoughts. Erin's loyalty towards Charlie had kept him alive and free to come back and cause trouble for her years later. Voight might've rescued Erin from the streets but his help didn't come without strings. Even now, 15 years later, Voight was still pulling the strings in her life, trying to control her personal life. Not to mention, Erin was willing to take the rap for a murder just to keep her friend safe and keep Annie together with her son.

Jay's eyes returned to Erin, his heart aching for the woman on the other side of the mirror. She had been through hell in her life and she still had to fight every day. Erin had learned all of her life that nothing came for free. No one helped without expecting anything in return. Not Charlie. Not Voight.

Jay didn't want to be another person on that list, not if he could help it.


Jay had never felt this much satisfaction as he was right now, dragging a handcuffed Charlie to a jail cell. Charlie was dragging his feet, going at a snail pace, and sneaking glances at Jay from the corner of his eyes and smirking every so often.

"Just keep walking," Jay ordered, nudging Charlie to go faster.

"You have no idea what I did for her, you know?" Charlie suddenly spoke.

"You mean rape her?" Jay shot back, trying to control the outburst of anger in his chest whenever he was reminded of what Charlie did to Erin.

"Rape?" Charlie smirked. "She was perfectly willing."

Jay resisted the urge to punch the hell out of him. "She was 15. You were 25. That's statutory rape. Count your lucky stars that you're making it into a jail cell in one piece."

Charlie just chuckled, unfazed by what Jay said. "Look at you getting all worked up because of her. You're being pulled in by her pretty face. Careful, you might go down like I did. I saved her all those years and look at what I got in return."

Jay scoffed. "We're not the same people, Charlie. And you don't know jackshit about me."

"Really? I don't hear you deny your feelings for her. Although it'd be pointless. I saw that look in your eyes earlier. I have to say though detective, you're not the first guy I've seen with that look when it comes to Erin." Jay just ignored him, finding it pointless to engage with the guy. The faster he can throw Charlie in a jail cell, the better. "You should take my advice, detective. You'll be thanking me one day."

Finally they arrived at Charlie's cell and Jay pushed the guy in and slammed the door shut. "I don't owe you anything but seeing you here where you belong has me in a generous mood. So I'm going to leave you with one thing. We're not alike. We're never going to be alike. You might see yourself as her savior but you were anything but. You took advantage of a teenage girl down on her luck. Nothing was ever free with you. You took more than you ever gave her, Charlie."

"So how are you different? You're saying you don't want anything more with Erin than a working partnership?" Charlie asked, chuckling. "You're not a good liar."

Jay just shook his head, throwing Charlie one last grin. "I don't want anything from Erin more than what she's willing to give me. You had a price attached to everything. I don't. And I never will. Enjoy your stay, Charlie."

With one final look at the guy, Jay headed back to the bullpen. After all, they had one more guy to catch.


Jay nursed a bottle of beer in his hands as he waited for Erin to arrive. She was meeting with Annie before coming to meet him. All Jay hoped was that Annie knew just how good a friend she had in Erin and just what Erin was willing to do to save her ass.

He rested his elbow on the bar and dropped his head on his hand, pinching the bridge of his nose with his other. It had been too close of a call today, for both he and Erin. Erin could've gone down along with Charlie and Jay could've been killed by Radner if Erin hadn't shot the leader of Charlie's crew first and saved Jay's ass.

"Long day?" Jay's head shot up as soon as he heard her teasing raspy voice. She had a smile on her face as she sat down next to him at the bar.

Jay grinned. "Guess you can say that," he commented as he watched Erin order a beer from the bartender and holding up as soon as she got it as a toast. "What are we drinking to?"

Erin pursed her lips, thinking. "To pulling off a bandaid."

Jay laughed. "To pulling off a bandaid," he repeated, referring to the advice he had given her earlier in the locker room. "Quick and painless."

"I wouldn't exactly call it painless," Erin protested, teasing. "But needing to do it all the same."

"Cheers," Jay said, clinking their bottles together before they both took a big gulp, needing it after the couple of days they had.

"Nice place," Erin said as she wiped her mouth. "You come here often?"

Jay glanced around at the small dive bar nearby where he lived. He had ventured into the hole in the wall place one night after a long day at work and he didn't feel like going to Molly's. So far, it was his well kept secret, until tonight when he was sharing it with Erin.

"It's not bad. Away from everyone we know which sometimes is…"

"Nice? Necessary? Freeing?"

"All the above," Jay replied.

He watched mesmerized as Erin tossed back her head and laughed. This was his favorite sight and he was so relieved to see it after the past couple of days she had been through. It was good to see that Erin was doing okay after what Charlie put her through. She was strong and resilient and Jay knew she'd be okay.

Erin's laugh tapered off and a more serious look crossed her face. She bit her lips as she slowly brought her hand closer to his that was resting on the bar. "In case I haven't said it, thank you."

Jay smiled. "You have and you're welcome," Jay replied, thinking back to the small moment they shared in the bullpen earlier after they finally wrapped up the case. Erin had come out of Voight's office, looking like the weight was finally lifted off of her shoulders and Jay had to stop himself from pulling her in his arms, Voight's probing eyes watching their every move from his office.

"Well, I know I don't say this enough but you're a great partner," Erin whispered, shyly meeting his eyes.

"Ditto," Jay returned, smiling. "You saved my ass today. If it wasn't for you, I'd be dead with a bullet hole in my chest." Perhaps the image of the close call and what could've happened earlier flashed across Erin's mind because her face suddenly sobered and she grabbed his hand, covering it with hers. Jay didn't want her to dwell on what could've happened or for Erin to beat herself with the guilt. So he turned his hand over and laced their fingers together, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze to let her know that he was fine. "I'm okay, Erin. You saved me. Because that's what we do for each other. We save each other. Anything…"

His words were cut off when Erin's other hand suddenly came up to cover his mouth before it pulled away and her fingers started to caress his lips. Jay couldn't form another word, completely speechless and entranced by her and what her touch was doing to him.

She continued tracing his lips with her soft touch, her eyes pulling in him completely. He was completely taken by her. There was no hope left for him.

"You were there for me, Jay," Erin began speaking, her voice soft and quiet, meant to be shared between just the two of them. "Without me having to ask, you stepped up and you've been a great friend. I'm sorry I haven't been as good of a friend to you as you've been to me. I owe you one."

Hearing the last four words had Jay stopping Erin from continuing. "That's just it, Erin," he said, covering her hand that was holding his face with his own, pressing both of their joined hands into his cheek. "You don't owe me anything," Jay stressed, wanting to make it absolutely clear. "I don't want to be like Charlie or like Voight. I don't want to be another person that expects things from you or make you feel like you owe me."

He truly didn't. This wasn't the first time Erin has told him "she owed him one". He hadn't thought much of it before but after today and finding out everything, it became clear to Jay. Erin had been used to transactional relationships where nothing was free or done out of the goodness of the other person's heart. There was a price and a string attached to everything that had been given to Erin. Charlie. Voight. But Jay would be damned if he'd be another person.

"All I want is for you to be safe and happy," Jay continued, hoping that Erin could hear the sincerity in his words. "And if I can do something to make that happen then I'm going to. No expectations or retribution needed in return."

He saw Erin's eyes began to glisten but she held them back, instead giving him a smile in return. "I know, Jay," she whispered. "Thank you."

She leaned forward and laid a soft kiss on his cheek, quick and fleeting but heartstopping all the same. Jay's eyes shut on their own at the sensation of feeling her lips on his skin again, no matter how brief it was. God, he was so far gone for her.

And the thing was, Jay didn't care. He was done fighting his feelings for her. If he had to wait forever for Erin to realize that she wanted something more with him, then he wouldn't push, he wouldn't press. He'd wait.


But what Jay didn't know was that the wait might be shorter than he thought because while he went home with a slight buzz and a good sleep waiting for him, Erin's night wasn't quite over yet.

She stepped out of the bar, letting the cool air wash over her face and allowing herself to take a deep breath. And damn, if she didn't need it. Being close to Jay just the two of them, away from the prying eyes and nosey ears of people they knew, with Jay saying those wonderful words to her was getting a little too hot and heavy for Erin.

But the feeling of the cool and crisp air had given Erin the clarity she needed. And when her phone rang and she saw the name flashed across the screen, her mind was even clearer on what she had to do.

She pressed the 'answer' button and brought the phone to her ears.

"Hey Kelly," she said. "Yeah, let's meet up. We need to talk."


AN: Shameless plug— if you want to read the Charlie episode from Mouse's POV then check out chapter 2 of 'No Dice'.

Finally, 2 down, just Voight left to go.