"Huh!" Logan exhaled as he glanced over the twin's nursery, his hands tucked into his pockets. The decorator had finished the room just this morning, and as he'd give Rory free hands with the room to nest, hoping she would start feeling more and more engaged with the idea, he really hadn't involved himself in the whole planning process.
"You hate it," Rory sighed, feeling discouraged. She'd put some serious thought into what she wanted for the girls, and that certainly wasn't the pink princess theme. And if anything, she'd give the decorator some photos from Evie's nursery as examples but advised her to tone it down on the pink a little. Her original plan of reusing a lot of Finny's old things had gone out the door, after the decorator had advised her that the crib model Finny had was no longer sold, and for the sake of keeping things uniform in the room, they just donated most of the things they'd kept around from his baby-age bedroom. Now two almond and white Wooster cribs stood in the room, side by side, the longer sides against the wall but head's placed together, enabling the babies to see each other and touch if they reached through the bars. It wasn't exactly what she'd imagined, but she'd gotten a smaller mesh-separated bedside crib for upstairs, as had proven practical with Finny, who'd just slept whereever she'd been.
"No, I don't hate it," Logan shook his head, adding, "it's just not what I expected."
"What did you expect - castles and unicorns? Rory exclaimed curiously. "Have we met?" Rory added sarcastically, adding a smile.
"All I know is what Honor would've put into a girls nursery," he chuckled, having almost imagined Rory being much like that, realizing he should've known better. "Did you know that Honor thought she was getting a girl when she was expecting Conrad. Boy, did she put the decorator through a lot of work by having her switch out all that pink," he recalled, laughingly.
"Really?" she said, trying to imagine herself in Honor's position. The room they stood in now was fairly neutral in that sense - the large patterned flower and leaf wallpaper in dark blue, lavender and very light nude pink, covering the wall behind the cribs, the rest painted in a calm shade of light grey. The room had lavendel blackout curtains with half-length macrame curtains on the sides, bringing in some warmth against the light grey carpet. She was reusing Finny's nursing armchair, having replaced it with a small couch in Finny's room which had proved useful each time she was supposed to read him a story - the former reading corner on the floor having lost its appeal to Rory for obvious reasons.
Logan nodded, adding confidently, "but I don't think we'll have that problem." They'd had two ultrasounds by now and even had another doctor in for a second opinion, as they were keeping a very close eye on Rory, just in case, and there had been no doubt that they were expecting girls.
"Then we still need to get the carseats, and then we're set," Rory explained, pulling out one drawer of the dresser and admiring her folding abilities - one onesie cuter than another, most of them in preemie size to begin with just waiting to be worn, and a size larger of everything tucked away in their walk-in-wardrobe to wait for their time. She'd even packed her hospital bag, though hoping she would need it for a few months still.
"Seriously? You're done?" Logan asked in amazement, having been under the impression she'd been crazy busy with her thesis and had not really time to deal with baby-things other than the nursery, which had pretty much been for her to just confirm.
"I guess I just had a little too much time on my hands," Rory shrugged, feeling a little proud of herself. She'd put her nimble fingers to good use, keeping her lists and crossing things off while she online shopped extensively whenever she had a moment, and by already knowing what was worth getting from her experience with Finny and suggestions from Lane and Paris, it really hadn't been very tricky. It had been almost too easy, and she kept wondering whether she was forgetting something. But truthfully, she just hadn't been able to slow down from the pace she'd gotten used to writing her thesis, that now was handed over.
"You want me to come to your defence on Monday?" he asked, recognizing this almost frantic preparation as a pattern, as he stroked her back.
"You don't have to," Rory replied humbly.
"I'll be there," he replied, as if it was the most obvious thing.
Rory glanced at him under her brow, but kissed him gratefully. This was a big deal, and while she would manage perfectly fine on her own, she did appreciate his offer to be there.
"Ugh, there they go again," she grumbled, being hit by at least three limbs within a very short interval from the inside. She was feeling like a punching bag these days.
Logan chuckled humbly - despite the pain the twins were causing her, he couldn't help but to like the idea of them moving, being smitten with the thought of them as it was.
"I can't believe they just trust some guy who just picks a time and starts making demands whenever it suits him," Lorelai rambled in their bedroom behind closed doors, having just fifteen minutes ago gotten off the phone with social services. Apparently they had finally tracked down Leo's dad, who had never played a significant role in his life but now, hearing what had happened, was demanding Leo's custody back. Lorelai didn't have all the details, she'd never even seen the guy, but she just had a gut feeling - she didn't like this one bit.
"That's how the system works, it's not perfect. But surely this could be good for him - maybe he really didn't know about the situation," Luke pitched in, clearly trying to place himself in the guy's shoes.
"Not everybody is you, Luke. The world is not such a pretty place," Lorelai said, hiding a compliment in there somewhere.
"So when are we getting more information about this?" Luke asked practically.
"They're meeting with him next week and doing a home visit, if all checks out I guess they'll set up a meeting with him and that guy, and… I don't know, it sounded soon," she explained worriedly. It sounded too soon. While Luke hadn't really gotten too attached to the kid in the past couple of months, Lorelai had just begun to really think of the kid as a part of their household, as someone that belonged. And she knew it was her own fault for getting attached like that, but she really hadn't expected it to be over this soon, nor this suddenly.
"Should we tell him?" Luke asked.
"Let's just wait and see what they say next week," she replied, not wanting to get Leo's hopes up, or on the contrary upset about leaving. To her it seemed Leo was actually beginning to fit in too, doing well in school. He was no Rory-Gilmore-level overachiever but he did alright, he even got invited to a few birthday's by classmates and those invites actually had seemed genuine. The last thing the kid needed was being uprooted on a whim.
Jess was taking the CT-15 North towards Stars Hollow, through the slight drizzle, the windshield wipers beginning to squeak, wondering what Lorelai's idea of a garden party in this weather was going to look like. That really was only a side thought, with Celeste playing with Evie on the backseat, having just picked her up from the clinic. He wasn't too sure how good of an idea it was to bring her straight to Stars Hollow craziness, but she'd insisted, not wanting to deny Evie a fun day with her grandparents and Luke and Lorelai, besides, knowing also Rory, Logan and Finny were going to be, she was keen to see everybody herself as well, though hoping people wouldn't treat her any differently.
Either way - contrary to the weather, which seemed weepy and miserable, the sight of Celeste talking and smiling to Evie in the rear view mirror made Jess' chest ache with happiness, having to force himself to keep his expectations low.
"Jess, oh my god, I forgot," Celeste suddenly grabbed a hold of his seat from the back, shocking him out of his haze.
"What?" he asked, glancing into the mirror, beginning to worry it was something important. He really didn't want to go back to the clinic, hoping everything about the place was behind them.
"A present for Lorelai! I completely forgot!" she worried.
"I have it covered," Jess replied smugly. Damn, it felt good to just discuss something as casual and unimportant, in the grand scheme of things, as this.
"What did you get?" she asked.
"Honestly..," he began, hoping she wasn't going to be mad at him. "I didn't really have time to go looking for anything and I just pitched in with something Rory was getting her, it was some sort of a trip, concert tickets, whole big crazy Gilmore Girls thing, but I forgot what it was exactly," he added apologetically. He'd had other things on his mind, clearly, and he'd welcomed Rory's offer.
"Oh," Celeste reacted, being reminded by all that he'd had to deal with on his own, being hit by a bang of guilt nonetheless. "Good, I should thank her for thinking of us later," she added.
"It's Rory, you really don't have to," Jess replied. Him and Rory were past polite gestures - especially in the past month or so she'd helped him so much, it was in fact Rory who'd told him to stop thanking her after every little thing. He really was beginning to feel like he had a big sister or something, someone who didn't need explanations on what he was feeling or what he needed, she'd just assumed and more times than not, assumed right.
Celeste didn't reply, she was going to do it anyways - for everything.
Evie was literally holding onto Celese's fingers almost the entire rest of the ride, as if worried if she let go she was going to disappear again, but she certainly wasn't objecting.
The rain stopped almost as if on cue, as they turned onto Maple street, leaving the familiar town square behind them.
"Hey, just try to ignore whatever my mom and TJ say, okay?" Jess said, as he parked the car. It was mostly the two of them he was the most worried about, while meaning well or not meaning anything at all, they had the least filter out of everyone who knew where she'd really been.
Celeste was barely out of the car as she was grabbed into a firm hug from Liz, as feared. Jess was just getting Evie out of her car seat, knowing how she disliked being strapped in her carseat in a standing car, and was almost beginning to ask her mother to release her, as he overheard one of the quotes she was telling her, still hugging her tightly.
"It doesn't matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop," Liz said. It was one of her addiction recovery quotes, and Jess had heard it enough times, one which she tended to use often out of context, but at least, it wasn't anything too painful.
"That's enough mom, please let her breathe," Jess appealed in a low tone, trying to make it sound like a joke, while meaning it with more concern than that.
"Oh, come on," Liz chided, hugging his son and pulling Evie into her arms instead. "Oh, she still has that amazing baby smell," she added with endearment, taking a whiff of her hair. Celeste was painfully aware of that.
Celeste would've gladly held Evie herself at that moment, almost feeling like she couldn't get enough of her. Liz walked the three towards white party tent Luke had put up by the garage, the pink-and-purple painted garage acting as the shelter for the long communal dinner table, while Sookie had set up some sort of a fancy portable grill by the stairs. Thankfully Evie was just as eager to choose Celeste's lap instead of Liz's and she twisted herself enough to make her wishes clear while holding out her arms to her, melting Celeste's heart. Evie wrapped her limbs around her mother tightly, like a small koala bear.
"Aint she a sweetie," Babette stepped up casually, gently squeezing Evie's cheeks in passing, while Jess greeted Doula, who was excited to see him, continuing towards the food, glancing a watchful look towards Celeste on occasion.
"Hey!" Rory called out over the crowd as soon as she got the car door open and turned her legs out the door, adding, "I'd run but I think you're faster right now," to Celeste, while Logan went to get Finny from the back.
While they'd texted a few times, she hadn't seen her all those weeks and she couldn't help but to smile broadly at the sight of her. With Evie on her hip she rushed to greet them, while Finny already dashed towards Luke, who grabbed him by his sides and threw him in the air to the sound of his laughter.
"Thank you, for everything," Celeste whispered to Rory.
"You would've done the same," Rory assured, stroking her back assuringly. "It's so good to see you," Rory exclaimed, leaning her arm around her shoulders supportively.
"And you too, thanks," Celeste hugged Logan.
"Hey, anything you need, okay?" he replied, looking her straight in the eyes. He felt guilty for not having paid as much attention - after all they'd once been close. And if anyone - he was the one who understood best the aspects of this that related to her 'past life'.
"You've grown, Finny too," Celeste commented, suddenly beginning to realize just how much she'd lost in time as she noted Rory's bump and Finny looking more and more like an actual kid not a baby.
"Tell me about it - I get bigger and he gets heavier, you can just imagine the tantrums he gets when I won't pick him up," Rory explained as she rolled her eyes. She wanted to ask how she was doing, but this wasn't the question she wanted to open with, not to spoil her mood. Besides, at that moment she looked perfectly happy. She could only hope that she really was.
"Hey! You made it!" Lorelai exclaimed as she came down the porch stairs, a wine glass in one and a bowl of salad in the other hand, extending a quick half-hug to all of them. Both Rory and Celeste could see that something was troubling her but she tried to put on a brave face, Rory making a mental note to ask later.
Lorelai was having her party with a few weeks delay actually, having had the past three weekends booked solid for three different wedding parties at the Inn, having postponed her own celebrations.
The kids played, Doula and later Leo as well taking over entertaining Evie and Finny on the porch where it was dry, while the others ate all the wonderful five different types of appetizers and two main courses that Sookie had made. People talked - thankfully nobody really mentioning anything specific that would've hit a gentle spot with Celeste. It was mostly about summer plans, the kids, a little about work and Rory's thesis defence, Lorelai feeling exceptionally proud.
"You want to head home?" Jess asked as he took a seat next to Celeste on the porch bench a few hours later. She'd been watching the kids play, quite enjoying the freedom to roam the toddlers had here, Doula throwing around a colorful beach ball, between the two, Leo pitching in on occasion.
"No hurry, it's kind of nice here. She's having fun," she replied, feeling almost sentimental. She'd almost expected this to be overwhelming but it was actually the most sense of community she'd felt in a while. Sure, she'd been to these things in a while, but she could only be amazed how big of a difference drugs and/or the therapy had made. In that moment she actually felt happy.
"Here," he offered her the piece of Sookie's famous chocolate cake he'd brought on a small dessert plate.
"I really shouldn't," she replied, gesturing towards her body as if pointing at her reasoning.
"Hey, none of that - you look beautiful. One bite at least," Jess insisted, feeding her a bite.
"It's good," she replied smilingly after she chewed and swallowed, wiping the corners of her mouth clean with her fingers.
In the meanwhile Rory had retreated indoors, wanting to put her feet up, having a comfortable position on the couch, hearing Sookie arguing with Luke about the lack of proper sized dessert plates in the kitchen, Sookie not quite recognizing paper plates as worthy enough for her chocolate cake.
Rory couldn't help but to feel a little out of place in her childhood home these days - a lot had changed - she no longer had a room there, she no longer had her things there, the living room contained a lot more Luke than it had before. And as much she hated to admit it it, the place felt cramped - she'd gotten so used to the living a very different kind of like, the luxury of it having become her new normal.
"Are you feeling alright?" Lorelai asked as she walked in to check on her. "Want me to get you something?" she added.
"Just needed to alter the direction of the gravitational pull on my body," Rory grumbled. "Is Finny okay out there?" she asked with some concern.
"Oh yeah, he's playing with Evie," Lorelai replied.
"Everything okay with you?" Rory asked, recalling her looking not quite her usual party-self.
"Ah..," she exhaled, glancing around so there wouldn't be unnecessary pairs of ears around. "Leo might get moved. His dad is suddenly showing interest… I really don't know what to think," she explained.
"Wow, it's sudden," Rory said propping herself up on her elbow.
"Yeah," Lorelai replied, adding, "I haven't told him yet, I'm waiting for some more concrete instruction first, but damn… I never expected to get this attached, you know," she admitted.
"Sorry," Rory said, followed by an, "auch," as one of the twins kicked her.
"The girls starting a miniature version of a soccer team in there?" Lorelai asked, taking a seat on the footrest by the couch.
"You want to feel?" Rory asked.
She really shouldn't have needed to ask. Sure, Lorelai had felt Finny before, but the past months had been crazy, and they really hadn't hung out much.
"Wow, was that just two kicks at once?" Lorelai noted with astonishment.
"Yeah, I'm pretty sure that was the two of them together, they've grown to coordinate their movements," Rory chuckled, not knowing whether to laugh or cry at that thought.
"If you need my help, just ask, okay? Babysitting or anything," Lorelai offered.
"I think we have it covered with Maya, but I will," Rory assured, realizing she needed to ease Lorelai on the news that they'd gotten a full-time nanny.
"What happened to Cathy?" Lorelai asked confusedly, keeping her palm still on Rory's bump, feeling a few more gentle nudges.
"She's been watching Evie, I thought you knew," Rory replied, somewhat surprisedly.
"Oh," Lorelai reacted. It did make sense - where else would've Jess gotten a nanny so fast.
"And, yes, before you ask, Maya is living with us," Rory admitted, already expecting some sort of a negative comment about having live-in help. She still hadn't fully shaken the fear of her mother's comments, even though Lorelai hasn't really done that these days, but the feeling her dissaproval had left her in the past still lingered.
"Yeah, I sort of figured, with the twins it makes sense," Lorelai added, surprising Rory with her concord.
Rory smiled weakly, pulling herself up to sit, holding her stomach. "Nature calls," she said, and pulled herself up to head for the bathroom.
Lorelai watched her daughter waddle down the hall. While the life Rory was living was very different from what Lorelai had pictured for her daughter, she could see now that it wasn't really a bad life she was living, far from it. Logan clearly loved her greatly, he'd shown it throughout their marriage, making sacrifices himself rather than asking Rory to make them, and supporting her in whatever she wanted to do. And while becoming a mother of three under three was in no way an easy task, kids also meant lots of love, which with the support system Rory had, clearly wasn't something that would be shadowed by the work this was going to take. She sighed to herself, as she continued to sit there, thinking about Leo. While she didn't want to give up, she knew she needed to accept whatever was going to happen - she needed to become more resilient, more prepared.
