Disclaimer: see my profile.
A/n thank you all again for your kind support. I promise I will answer all of your reviews very soon. I am sorry for the delay with this chapter. I hope you all enjoy it and that you're staying safe in this crazy world.
Blood-Stained Hands
JJ hummed under her breath as she moved around the kitchen and made breakfast and coffee. She had finished whisking eggs when Spencer entered the room.
"Hey," she greeted and went to kiss him.
"Hi."
"Your eyes alright this morning?"
Spencer nodded as he picked up his coffee mug. "Yes, much better. I think the burning was a result of going back to contacts. My eyes need time to adjust, again."
"Good," JJ said as she grabbed a glass bowl containing her eggs. "Let's enjoy scrambled eggs and toast."
Spencer smiled for her, and she almost sighed with happiness. His pleased smile always made her feel light-headed. "I am hungry."
"Then why don't you put in the toast?"
"Yes, chef."
JJ playfully smacked him on the arm with her hand towel. "Watch it, mister."
Spencer put in the toast, and several minutes later, they were sitting down to their breakfast. "I hope we get to enjoy the entire weekend," he said.
"Me too."
"What would you like to do?"
"Well, I think we should go for a long walk. We can stop at the outdoor market. I saw a sign yesterday for apples and cherries. I want to make pies."
"I love apple pie."
"With vanilla ice cream," JJ said and sighed. "I shouldn't, though."
"Why?"
'I need to watch my figure," JJ said and laughed when Spencer frowned.
"You're beautiful, JJ. You don't need to lose weight."
"No, you're right, but I want to keep it that way."
Spencer finished his eggs and coffee. When JJ stood, he grabbed her and pulled her into his lap. "Spence," she squealed. "What in the world?"
He kissed her, and JJ forgot about the mess in the kitchen until he finally let her breathe. "What was that all about?" JJ asked.
"To show you that you don't need to worry. I love you."
"Spence."
"I know you have to look good for the cameras, but please don't overdo dieting for the fourth estate or me."
"I'm not. I'm staying healthy for me. That's why I didn't put any butter in the eggs, even though they are better with a little."
"Alright, I get it. Let's talk about something else, like what we'll do tonight."
JJ narrowed her eyes. "I think going to bed early for a change is a great idea."
Spencer's eyebrows went into his hair. "You read my mind."
JJ climbed off his lap and grabbed her plate. "To sleep, babe, only for desperately needed sleep. We – or should I say – you stayed – up – way too late last night."
"You're beautiful, sexy, and brilliant. I can't help myself."
JJ's cheeks warmed at his compliments. "Even so, we're going to enjoy the weekend and get some rest."
Spencer sighed. "I don't want to agree with your assessment, but you're correct."
"Then let's get ready for the day."
CMCMCMCMCMCM
JJ stared at the hallway to her bedroom and then blew out a breath. They had enjoyed a wonderful weekend together. JJ dropped down onto her sofa and put her chin on her knees. If only she could think of some way to make Spence understand.
She rose and walked carefully back to her room. Spencer sat on the edge of the bed where she'd left him. He wore only slacks. Usually, the sight of his bare shoulders and the slimness of his waist made her feel warm all over. Now, the slump of his back hurt her heart.
"Spence."
He turned, and she noticed he held his bloody sweater vest. Dried blood still stained his hands, and his eyes were bloodshot. He didn't smile, and the blankness in his expression poured acid into her blood.
"I thought you were going to take a shower."
Spencer released a breath and looked down at his ruined article of clothing. "I was going to, and then I couldn't get up from the bed."
"Okay, you can shower in the morning. Come lay down."
"No!"
JJ flinched at the anger in his voice. "Spence."
"I'm sorry," he sagged against her when she joined him on the bed.
"I don't want to sleep in the same bed with you until I wash my hands."
JJ stroked his arm and hugged him tightly. "I understand."
Spencer pulled away from her and went to the bathroom. She waited, and finally, he returned. He changed into a pair of pajama bottoms and an old teeshirt he kept at her place and crawled into bed.
JJ slid over and hugged him. He stiffened and relaxed enough to entwine his legs with her and hold her until she felt him relax and fall asleep.
CMCMCMCMCMCMCM
JJ poured out a cup of coffee the following day and sipped it. Spencer still slept, and she didn't have the heart to wake him. Hotch had said Spencer and Garcia were to take the day off, and JJ had called in sick. She didn't know or care if Hotch figured out the reason why. Suddenly, the team knowing their secret didn't matter.
If only there were some way to get Spencer to talk to her. She sighed and took another sip from her mug. She let her eyes roam around the room, and they fell on her stationery and pen.
Writing a letter seemed like a bad idea, but maybe it would help if she let him know how much she meant to her.
CMCMCMCMCMCMCMCM
Spencer went to his sofa with the letter JJ had given him before he'd left her house that afternoon. She'd let him sleep, and she'd fed him food for the body. They'd kissed and said goodbye after she told him that she wanted him to read what she'd written, and then if he wanted to talk, he should call her.
Dearest Spence,
Since we first began to write to each other, I've found it easy to put my thoughts into words. It's effortless to talk to you either with the written word or in person because you're so kind, thoughtful and you listen. This time, I am struggling to find the right words, my love.
I know that you relate to Nathan in ways that I can never understand, but I also know that you did the right thing last night. You wouldn't be my Spence if you'd let him die as he wanted. Such an act would've torn your soul in two.
You believe that you saved a man who may kill an innocent person one day, and maybe he will. Spence, what separates us from the animals is our ability to show compassion to each other, to love each other unconditionally.
I love you, and I want you to know that you'll always have me by your side.
JJ
Spencer felt a tear drop onto the page, and he swiped at his eyes. He sighed and folded the letter. JJ did make sense, but he wondered how long it would be until he stopped feeling guilty for the possibility of more bloodshed.
He picked up his phone and dialed a familiar number. "Hey," he said when JJ answered.
"Hi. I'm glad you called me."
"Thanks for the letter."
"You're welcome."
"You have time to talk," Spencer asked as he rose and went to look out of his window at night, falling behind the glass.
"Yep. Always for you, Spence."
