I decided you needed more today, dear reader. I hope you enjoy this extra post.
"Knowing something is the right thing doesn't make it easy." Lou told Tani. His voice was soft, tone tender. Like a father to a daughter. "Steve has some thinking to do. And he can't do it here."
"Too many ghosts. I get that part." Tani frowned, arms crossed, feet planted. Eyes sticking Lou with a pin.
"So what then?" Lou was ready for a tense conversation. They all had some feelings to get out, and he knew stubborn. His daughter could be worse than a mule. He knew he could get through to Tani, but he had to approach this sideways, let her lead.
"He could have waited."
"Then he might never pull the trigger." Lou shifted his stance. "Bad choice of words. If Steve had waited to leave, nothing would change."
"Why do things have to change?" She wrinkled her nose. "I like things the way they are…were..."
"You do this job for too long, and it gets to you. I hope you never have it this bad. But being a cop, it eats at you. Nonstop." Lou sighed and put his arm around her. "Come on. I need your help with Danny."
She nodded and dabbed her eyes. "It's tough seeing him like this. After everything –"
They both looked toward the water. A lone figure stood on the sand, leaning heavily on a cane, backlit by the house lights.
"We're gonna be strong for him. Help him through this."
"What about us? I can't –" Tani turned into Lou and sobbed against him.
Lou knew he was the father figure of the team. Time's like this, he was glad he had the experience to back him up. "Hey now. It's okay. Let it out."
After a minute or two, she straightened and wiped her face, eyes still filled with rain clouds. "I'm ok now. Thank you."
"Good because he's gonna need us." Lou motioned toward Danny.
Her face hardened a little, and she set her jaw. "Well, I'm done watching him mope."
"Wait." Lou stopped her. "Let me go first. You need a minute."
"But you just said both of us." Tani frowned and looked like she wanted to ignore Lou and storm the beach. Then she closed her eyes and shook her head. "Fine, you're right."
/././
Hands in his pockets, Lou stood beside Danny in the quickly fading light. "He's running Danny. Right or wrong, that's what this is."
"Doesn't make it any easier when you're the one he's running from, Lou."
"It's not like that and you know it." Lou frowned, a bit stung by Danny's sharp tone.
Danny realized he needed to pull back his barbs, but he didn't relax. "I know he needed to go, alright. I get it. I do. It hurts but I understand."
"Bullshit."
Glaring at Lou, Danny held his ground for a minute, but then his expression shifted to a softness that broke Lou's heart. He could count on his hand all the times he'd seen Danny cry, and they were all related to Steve or his kids. Lou wanted to wrap him in a bear hug and make this all go away.
"Come on inside now. It's getting late."
"I'm fine. Really."
"I'll ignore that obvious lie." Lou shoved his hands into his pockets again and looked toward the house. "You can't sit out here all night."
He knew darn well that there'd been too many standoffs at these chairs. Mostly involving Steve. Lou wanted to toss them into the fire pit but he knew the stubborn men would come out here anyway. Something drew them to this spot. The endless ocean. The calming, distracting waves. It was hypnotizing and soothing depending on your mood. Right then, it drove Lou nuts.
"Lou. Please just…" Danny's voice trailed off and he stared out at the water. He closed his eyes and sighed. All his fight gone as the tide swiftly pulled away the last of his energy. "I need a minute."
"Ok. Alright. But I'll be back." Lou put his hand on Danny's shoulder. "We're here for you, man. Don't ever forget that."
A quick nod was all Danny could manage. If he looked Lou in the eyes, he'd lose it.
Lou mumbled his reply. "Alright then."
Danny sat in the chair and just listened to the ever-present breeze and water, background music he was used to now. The occasional bird call drifted his way, as they sang to the setting sun. Most important, he heard Lou walk away, footsteps soft. The back door slapped shut. They must all be in the house. Watching him no doubt. He felt like a bug.
Everything seemed to be in motion but him. He was pinned there. He felt like he was holding them back. Surely, they had places to go tonight. Things to do. He'd already consumed too much of their lives over the last week.
Danny heard the door again and waited, not sure who was padding his direction.
/././
Adam approached slowly. Danny turned and smiled. Adam was a good choice. He didn't push. He was a calm and steady presence in the group. Unless he was lurking around playing undercover with the Yakuza. Danny pushed aside his misgivings and past grievances for the man. He understood how tough it could be to navigate two worlds.
"Lou sent me." The statement sounded like an apology.
"Sit." Danny tapped the chair beside him.
Adam looked at empty space, his face neither happy or sad. "No, I can't do that. You know why I'm here."
Danny doubted anyone would ever sit in that chair again. Not until Steve returned from wandering the Earth.
"I'm fine. I can manage. Thank you." Danny rattled off his word shield. He was in no mood to be coddled.
Adam held his hands shoulder high. His smile was warm. "No problem, Danny. Let me know if I can help."
"I will. Okay?" Danny relaxed and sighed. He appreciated Adam's easy-going nature right then.
"Okay." Adam gave him nod. "Whatever you need."
They stared at one another. Neither man moving or giving up ground. Danny knew he needed to go about the motions. Appear normal even though that couldn't be further from the truth. He hoped it would help though, so he resolved to make an effort, if only to distract himself.
"I'm gonna take a shower." Danny stopped as he pushed himself up from the chair, taking a breath. "And no, I don't need assistance bathing."
Laughing Adam turned and headed for the house. "Don't worry, I wouldn't be the first to volunteer for that duty."
"What's that supposed to mean? I'm not attractive?" Now Danny laughed too, as he followed, using his cane best he could on the uneven ground.
Adam waved away Danny's dig at himself. "It's not that. You're just not my type."
"I'm everybody's type, babe."
Danny chuckled, but the good feeling faded as Adam disappeared through the door. Fake it til you make it took more work than people realized.
Thanks, as always, for reading.
