A/N: This chapter contains a nod towards Jessica Capshaw's guest appearance on The L-Word. The lines have been adapted, but they do come from episode 04x03 of The L-Word and are unfortunately not ours. We have taken some liberties with this story, but the original characters still belong to Shondaland.
Thank you all so much for your kind reviews, likes, and follows! We hope you will keep enjoying this story as more and more of the past is revealed.
Chapter 6: Up in the air
Andrews Air Force Base, Maryland, USA
Callie wondered why she thought it had been a good idea to keep downing Tequilas with Mark last night as she handed her suitcase to the baggage handler. Her partner in crime looked just as fresh and clean as she did, but she knew he felt as dead as she did. Fortunately, they had an eight-hour flight ahead of them and she could sleep it off. Sleeping would also help in avoiding Arizona, so two birds with one stone there.
Whenever she would fly out for an assignment, whether it was with a team or by herself, there was this buzz. It was almost like a pre-game buzz for a sports team. And right now, this was what got her going. She did feel slightly nervous as well, but the buzz helped her push down those feelings. She, Callie Torres, was on top of her game. Mark and her were called in because they were the best and she was going to show that to Officer Robbins.
The other team members were surely also feeling the buzz. She promised herself that after she had gotten some sleep, she would take some time to profile each and every one of them. Yesterday, during the briefing, she had been too busy dealing with Arizona to focus on her other team members. Callie quietly followed Mark onto the plane and pushed him aside to steal the window seat from him. Mark might have been taller and stronger than her, but she was definitely smarter. And she was not afraid to use that against him.
Mark groaned, more from the surprise rather than from being in pain. "Torres, behave," he mumbled. He sat down in the comfy leather chair next to Callie and eyed his good friend. "We don't want to piss Gizmo off this early. We have to give her some time to settle in first."
Callie snorted and raised an eyebrow at him. "Gizmo? Really?"
"It's brilliant, Torres, and you know it," he quipped back while he settled himself.
The other team members were also entering the plane and Callie groaned as Arizona sat down in the aisle seat on the other side of the aisle across from her. Now she was going to have to look at the blonde for eight straight hours. Sleep was starting to look even more appealing now.
"Morning, boss," Mark greeted her with a big toothy grin.
"Sloan, Torres," Arizona replied, acknowledging the pair of FBI agents while she settled in her own seat. She slid her briefcase under her seat and buckled up.
"Morning," Callie greeted her back, flashing her a smile. The smile she got in return was a polite one, but Callie knew it was not completely genuine. She had been on the receiving end of Arizona's genuine smiles and this was not it.
Once they were up in the air and the seatbelt sign was turned off, everyone seemed to get up to get their morning coffee. The private plane they found themselves in was plenty spacious. Callie and Arizona could have both sat on opposite sides of the plane without having to see each other. It irked Callie that Arizona had to sit right in her line of sight. The blonde had not gotten up and was buried in paperwork. Of course, Arizona would be reading and preparing. Little Miss Goodie two shoes!
Since the blonde seemed to be oblivious to Callie's inquisitive eyes, there was plenty of time to thoroughly observe her. Callie had done this so many times when they were roommates. She would watch Arizona do her homework or when they were watching a movie together. A small smile crept up her face as she watched Arizona's eyebrows form a slight frown, something she did when she was engulfed in reading something, trying to memorize it. And then there was the cute lip bite thing she did when she was thinking things through. Ugh, it was still super cute to watch.
The blonde had not changed a bit. Yes, they were older now and Callie noticed a few worry lines here and there on Arizona's face, but she was still as beautiful as ever. Those piercing baby blues would probably always make her feel some type of way, Callie was sure of it. She just had to make sure to avoid them as much as possible or find a better way to deal with them. When they first met she had felt those eyes peering into her soul, now she knew Arizona could actually see straight into her soul. It was annoying.
Her eyebrow almost made contact with her hairline when she noticed Arizona absentmindedly playing with the silver chain around her neck.
She had caught the briefest of glimpses of the necklace yesterday but thought she must have imagined it. There was no way it was the same one. The pendant was a small, green stone, a Peridot. Callie knew this because she had gotten Arizona that necklace nearly seven years ago. She had noticed it yesterday and it had made her stomach flip. And once again, Callie had to compose herself. No one in the history of the world had hurt her as much as Arizona Robbins had. No one in the history of her life had made her feel disposable like the blonde had. And now, seeing that necklace still on Arizona's neck, it stirred up old feelings. It seemed crazy for Arizona to just cast her aside all those years ago, but still wear the necklace she had given her.
Peridot was a beautiful, underrated green stone, the birthstone for anyone born in August. Since both their birthdays were in August, they had bought each other the same necklace. Their relationship had been a secret and matching necklaces was a way for Callie to sort of feel connected to Arizona when they pretended to be just friends. After their break-up, she had tossed hers in the trash, along with all other memorabilia that reminded her of Arizona.
Somewhere between observing and musing, Callie had fallen asleep. Since she now had her eyes closed, she did not notice that Arizona's eyes were now no longer transfixed on the papers in her lap. Callie was getting the same once over she had just given Arizona.
She had tried her hardest to avoid Callie's intense eyes and somehow seeing the FBI agent asleep felt like a relief. She could relax for a moment. Her body slumped into the seat, but her mind was working overtime. Her eyes slowly trailed over the dark-haired woman's beautiful face. They came to a sudden halt, transfixed on the Latina's plump lips. Arizona could remember the feeling of those soft lips on hers, on her skin….the thought alone gave her slight goosebumps on her arms. She could still remember their first kiss like it was yesterday.
Virginia - 2013
They had been standing in a group posing for a photo and just as Tyler, one of their classmates snapped the picture, Callie had cupped Arizona's boob from behind, which caused the blonde to appear in the picture with an extremely shocked look on her face. Arizona remembered she had been so angry with Callie for doing that and had stomped off on her own. The truth was Arizona had been developing feelings for the brunette, feelings that were more than platonic and it scared the hell out of her. Being gay was not part of her life plan, and certainly not something Colonel Robbins would have sanctioned.
Callie had gone after her and had eventually found her throwing stones into the water. As the dark-haired woman approached her, Arizona could not stop herself from cursing and muttering while she threw stone after stone into the small creek in front of them.
"Arizona," she had heard Callie call out cautiously, probably hoping that she would not chuck the hard object she was holding her way. Arizona had always been a pretty closed-off person, but somehow she had opened up to Callie and they had gotten to know each other pretty well over the past months. It did not change the fact that Arizona tended to bottle things up until they exploded. But somehow, Callie's voice just made her feel more at ease, even though the other woman was the reason why she was upset in the first place.
Arizona dropped the rock at the sound of her voice and whilst she didn't respond, she sat down on the water's edge. Callie had taken that as a sign it was safe to approach and sat down next to her roomie. It was only then that she saw the blonde's tear-stained face.
"Oh God, Arizona...I'm sorry. I'm so fucking stupid sometimes...I didn't mean to make you cry," she sat down next to her roommate and when there was no immediate reaction or brush off, she put her arm around Arizona's shoulder to soothe her.
"Don't touch me!" Arizona had shouted as she brushed the brunette's hand away, shrugging her off violently. "Don't ever touch me again, OK!"
"Woooooah," Callie had responded to the, in her eyes, over-the-top reaction. "I'm really sorry, Arizona. I was just goofing around, I didn't mean anything by it…"
They had been trained to not miss a thing and with her Masters in Behavioural Science, it did not get lost on Callie that Arizona's reaction seemed to be about more than just a very inappropriate joke. As much as it annoyed Arizona that Callie could read her like a book, it was also comforting, knowing she did not always have to explain exactly how she felt. Callie just got her. "Talk to me, Arizona," Callie had pleaded softly. "What's going through your head right now?."
"You don't want to know what I'm thinking Callie," Arizona had scoffed knowing that her super sexy, confident roommate would not be interested in a dork like her.
"Err, yeah I do!" Callie had said softly, smiling encouragingly at the blonde
Not being able to hold it in any longer, Arizona had just blurted out her words.
"Fuck it! OK...I literally cannot stop thinking about you." The blonde said, taking the brunette by surprise. Callie was NOT expecting THAT but remained silent as she gave Arizona time to express her feelings. "I think about you all the time, think about kissing you…. touching you...and it scares the shit out of me!" She broke down, embarrassed at having said what she had been thinking for the past two months. But on the other hand, it felt like a relief. At least the words were out now.
Once Callie had regained her composure, she scooted closer to Arizona and carefully wrapped an arm around the blonde's shoulder again, watching her expression to make sure she was OK this time around. Arizona did not want to shrug her off, instead, she felt her body sink into the other woman's with a soft sigh.
Without thinking, Callie pressed a gentle kiss to her temple. Arizona could still remember the feel of Callie's soft lips pressed against her skin. It had sparked something in her she could just no longer deny.
The taller woman pulled Arizona in tighter into her arms before swallowing the lump that had formed in her throat at hearing her roommate's confession
"I think about you too," she had admitted in a soft whisper. With every moment Arizona seemed to accept Callie's closeness, the dark-haired woman got bolder.
Arizona's heart had been pounding so hard, she was sure Callie could feel it. Callie had gently pushed a strand of hair behind Arizona's ear before using her index finger to guide Arizona's chin so the blonde would face her. "And I want to kiss you, too," she added in a low, husky tone of voice, her eyes staring deep into Arizona's.
Arizona swallowed hard this time. "You do?" she had asked in a tone of surprise and excitement. Her big, sad blue eyes glued to Callie's gentle brown ones.
"I do! But you have to say it," Callie spoke up again, her voice barely above a whisper. She leaned a little closer, still giving Arizona plenty of space to back out if she wanted to. "Can…..," her voice broke, having Arizona this close and feeling the already so tangible tension rise further even broke through Callie's confidence. "Can I kiss you, Arizona?"
The dark-haired woman in front of her, the woman that had been present in almost every single thought of the past two months was so close to her right now that Arizona could feel Callie's breath on her lips. All of a sudden it felt like her mouth was drier than a desert and not even swallowing would help. She was sure her voice was not going to work. Callie's scent filled her nostrils and kicked her mind into overdrive. But even though her head was working overdrive, it almost seemed like her body decided to step in and take control. Before she properly realised what was going on, she found herself nodding. And as she saw Callie's lips inching closer, all she could think was 'oh my God, oh my God, oh my God.'
And then it happened.
Callie's lips were softer than she had imagined. Pressing ever so gently against hers. Arizona did not know what hit her, every nerve ending in her body seemed to stand at attention and she felt goosebumps appear on her arms. Her head had started spinning and the groan leaving her throat when she felt Callie slowly retreat sounded like nothing she had ever heard. Some kind of weird auto-pilot took over and Arizona found herself grabbing at the back of Callie's neck, pulling her back in. This time it was Callie that groaned as their lips reconnected.
Knowing she was having that kind of effect on the oh so confident woman felt like a complete rush and Arizona wanted more. She slipped out her tongue and ran it over Callie's bottom lip, earning her a gasp. The blonde smiled into the kiss and used the element of surprise to push her tongue into Callie's mouth, taking control over the kiss the other woman initiated.
Once their tongues met, there was no longer anything tentative about their kiss. It seemed like the tension that had built up between them was all coming out at this very moment. Arizona's hands went into Callie's thick, silky hair, pulling her closer. The taller woman's hands landed on Arizona's hips as she let the blonde control the kiss.
Never before had she felt so much passion in a kiss. And never before had she felt so cared for by someone other than her parents or her brother as she did right now. She wanted to disappear into Callie's arms and just stay like that. Her whole body felt like it was on fire and it felt delicious.
Callie was the first to lean back. Her lips were parted as she panted slightly, her cheeks flushed, and her hair a little tousled. Once Arizona's eyes caught hers, her lips curled into a bright but gentle smile.
Once the realisation of what had just transpired hit her, a single tear escaped and rolled down Arizona's cheek. It was exhilarating and scary and...what did it all mean?
"I'm not gay," Arizona said quietly, as she furiously wiped at her face.
Callie had pulled the blonde into her arms and held her so tightly. Held her until she finally got her sobs under control and then she had gently wiped the blonde's face with the sleeve of her jumper before leaning in and placing a soft kiss on Arizona's forehead.
"You don't have to be gay if you don't want to, you know," Callie said gently. "You could be bi or maybe just Calliesexual," she added, trying to keep the subject light, wiggling her eyebrows at the last word she spoke.
Arizona let out a sound that could only be described as a mixture of a chuckle and a sob. "You are so fucking full of yourself, Torres."
Callie smiled, glad Arizona seemed to be accepting being consoled. "I'm serious though, you're still the same person...whatever you're feeling….it doesn't have to mean you're gay."
Arizona could remember Callie's words vividly. She even remembered the way she had looked when she said those words. You are still the same person. Maybe she had not physically changed, but that kiss had changed everything. It had made her a completely different person. And even now, all those years later, Callie Torres was turning her life upside down. Again. Just what she needed right now, more drama. She needed to make sure to keep everything between Callie and her purely professional. She did not feel like dealing with both Tom and her at the same time. Her life was already a big mess without Callie Torres adding to it.
##
If Callie had thought she was going to be able to sleep and feel well-rested, she was wrong. Because not only did Arizona turn her reality upside down, she also seemed to be dominating Callie's dreamworld. As the brunette sunk into her seat to catch some much-needed shut-eye, her thoughts transported her back to that boardroom..to the moment Arizona had asked her to stay behind..and then her imagination kicked in.
"Agent Torres," Arizona called out as she stood up, "Could I please have a word?" The words had made Callie stop dead in her tracks, her heart pounding in her chest. She turned around and walked back over to the big conference table. Arizona still stood on the other side and the table was forming a very welcome barrier.
The blonde walked around the table and closed the door before walking up to Callie. So much for the barrier. She could feel the temperature rising with every step Arizona took. She had gotten more confident over the years and it was getting to Callie. She swallowed hard as she watched Arizona bite on her bottom lip before she spoke up. The blonde's finger traced the edge of the table as she walked closer to Callie.
"Would it be wrong…..if I told you that I can't keep my eyes off of you?"
The words were hitting her like a bolt of lightning, electrifying her whole body, making her blood rush all over. She cleared her throat, trying her hardest to keep her voice steady.
"Yes." It was all Callie could say as her eyes darted from the finger tracing the table to Arizona's darkened, lust-filled eyes. Arizona stepped even closer, her scent invading Callie's nostrils, only adding to the excitement she already felt.
"Would it be wrong if I told you…," Arizona's voice trailed off as her index finger trailed the neckline of Callie's shirt. "That you are still the most intriguing person I have ever met."
Callie swallowed hard and unconsciously licked her lips. Deep down she knew what was coming and oh, how she wanted it. "Yes," came the breathy reply
"Would it be wrong if I told you….," Arizona paused to lick her own lips, her eyes focussed on Callie's bottom lip. "That I've never….wanted to kiss someone as much as I want to kiss you right now."
Even though her heart was practically hammering through her ribcage. She forced herself to keep her composure. She wanted to stay in control of this situation. "Yes." Unfortunately, her voice gave away how Arizona was affecting her, sounding less strong than the first two yeses.
Before she properly realised what was going on, Callie found herself pressed against the conference table as Arizona's lips crashed onto hers in a needy, almost frantic kiss. Arizona's tongue pushed past Callie's lips and took control over her mouth. The smaller woman's hands first went in her hair, roughly pulling Callie closer. She forgot all about wanting to be in control because what Arizona was doing to her was so delicious.
The kiss was sloppy and with Arizona pretty much pinning her against the table, Callie had little wiggle room. The blonde moved open-mouthed kisses to Callie's neck, pulling the taller woman's hair to the side to force her to tilt her neck for better access. All she could do in return was let out a low moan. She no longer cared if she sounded needy or not. She wanted this. "Fuck, Arizona," she managed to mutter while she felt the buttons of her shirt pop. The blonde's fingers seemed to be everywhere and within seconds her chest was bare and she watched how Arizona hungrily looked at her.
Callie was reminded of just how strong Arizona was when she felt herself being turned around roughly, the blonde's pelvis grinding against her ass. She had no idea what Arizona was planning, but soon found out when she felt her slacks being unbuttoned and unzipped in two swift motions, her panties being tugged down along with them. She quickly stepped out of them and moaned when Arizona bent her over the table. The blonde had never been this forceful with her and she was loving it. Oh god, how she was loving it.
She was so ready for whatever Arizona planned to do with her.
A shiver went down her spine as she felt the tips of Arizona's nails trace down her back, deep enough for her to feel but not deep enough to leave marks. "Jesus, Arizona, what…"
"Shhhh, no talking," the blonde whispered. Her hand was gone all of a sudden and Callie was about to groan in protest when just as sudden Arizona's fingers were exactly where she wanted them.
"Oh God," she murmured just when the teasing ended and two fingers went deep inside her. The murmur turned into a loud moan as her walls clenched around Arizona's fingers.
"Torres, wake up, you're drooling on me," Mark said as he shook his friend's shoulder. When he had returned to his seat, Callie had already been fast asleep and had rested her head on his shoulder. He had not minded until he felt a wet spot appear on his shirt.
Callie groaned and slowly sat up straight as she wet her lips and cracked her eyes open. She cleared her throat and uncomfortably fidgeted around on her chair, all the while truly hoping no one would notice what kind of dream she was having. It was freaking embarrassing.
"That sounded like some dream, Torres," Mark teased her. "Welcome back to earth."
Shit. Her cheeks turned bright red within seconds. But Callie quickly managed to regain her composure and sat up straight. "How long have I been asleep?" Her eyes locked onto Arizona, who was still sitting across the aisle from her. Fortunately, it seemed like the blonde was still engulfed in her paperwork and was none the wiser about what had transpired in Callie's dream. God, that was so inappropriate.
Mark checked his watch and flashed his co-worker a grin. "Five hours. You were all cute and everything, but the drooling….gross, Torres."
"I've been asleep for five hours?" Callie's eyes widened and the surprise immediately brought her back to the land of the awake.
"Sleeping Beauty needed her nap," Mark retorted with a chuckle.
Callie felt horrified. She was still slightly turned on from her dream and she wondered if the others had also noticed. She stretched her legs and moved her head around to get rid of some of the kinks in her neck, using the movement to look in the blonde's direction.
Her heart picked up its pace right away as she noticed Arizona's blue eyes staring directly at hers. Unlike the previous times their eyes met, Arizona did not look away. Instead, she locked her eyes on Callie's and raised one eyebrow at her, giving her an all-knowing look.
Fuck. Had she noticed?
