Hey guys! Thanks so much obsessedteenagefangirl for reviewing my story! Hope everyone enjoys this chapter! Constructive criticism and questions are wanted! Also, don't own a thing that JK Rowling does. I own the storyline and plot :):):):):)

Chapter 4: How To Give Your Friends 'The Look'

After having a massive lunch, Oscar, Dimitri, Hope, Roy, Rachel, Scorp, Jo, Maria and I all travelled down to the dungeons, where I would have my first potions class with Professor Skye. Apparently, she was the Head of Hufflepuff and was kind of boring as well as super talkative. As we walked in, I heard Hope and Maria's argument from here.

"Stop it! Just, shut up! I can't believe you told him I liked him!" Maria exclaimed. Hope was rubbing Maria's arms and back, apologising and offering condolences.

"It just blurted out. You know me, I can't keep secrets very well. I can't keep my mouth shut either. It's so irritating for me because-" Hope rambled until Maria shot her an evil look and shrugged off Hope's arms.

"Irritating for you? It's irritating for me, your best friend, that you can't keep my secrets! It's irritating to everyone that you just don't shut up! I mean, is it even possible for you to shut up?" Maria hissed as Hope's face crumbled. Maria covered her mouth in shock and I stifled a giggle. They fight every single day. Hope ran over to Oscar and I could tell she was gossiping about Maria.

"Can those two just be normal?" I sighed. Scorp and Jo shook their heads as we sat down in our seats. It was an all Slytherin class which was a relief.

The door burst open and a young girl with small glasses perched on her face stumbled in a tizzy. She had auburn hair with black tips. Her pale skin was freckled and covered in acne scars. Her nose was average, her eyes this ugly dishwater blue and... well I didn't really pay attention to her. All in all, she was a bit plain.

"Sorry! I'm Professor Skye as you all know! And welcome back to the amazing and intriguing class of potions," Skye said in an annoying voice. It was high pitched and very philosopher like. I could already tell I was going to hate her. Hope and Maria were now whisper arguing and Skye stared them down.

"Girls. No. Talking means you aren't listening and I am your professor who wants you to listen. This is the behaviour that Headmistress McGonagall hates. No, I said be quiet! Hope and Maria! Be quiet! You see, you are being ignorant and disruptive to the rest of us. I want to have and want to earn respect from my students. If I don't have respect from you, I have nothing," Skye rambled, her face stern and her arms crossed.

"None of us respect you!" a voice yelled out. Sniggers ran through the room as I snorted.

Skye reddened and smiled the 'teacher smile' (The 'teacher smile' is the look that says 'I'm only tolerating you and hate you all but I can't yell at you because I need a job' as well saying 'kids are so immature and babyish. I can't believe I chose teaching as my profession,' as well as saying 'just count to ten- 1,2,3' as well as 'I HATE THESE UNGRATEFUL CHILDREN! I'M RIGHT AND THEY'RE WRONG! WHY CAN'T THEY JUST RESPECT ME?').

"Kids, this is potions, not say whatever rude comments you want. You know, they did a study…" Skye went on and on about random and useless stuff. It was all 'kids need to learn to respect their elders' and 'studies show that kids are getting meaner each passing minute' and all that ish. I tuned out as did the rest of the class. In total, we spent about ten minutes actually doing work.

The next class, charms, was so much better. Professor Gerard was so funny. He was the Head of Slytherin and was so natural. Gerard was also the first professor I met, when he told off Jonny in the hallway for not being at the feast. Rumours surrounded him about him and Lupin getting into fights when they went to Hogwarts togther, but who cares? I still liked them both. I learned so much from him, and we even started doing some hard-core charms, like teaching us how to conjure up Patronus Charms. Of course, none of us can do one yet. He and Lupin were my now fave teachers.

Unfortunately, I could hardly concentrate in any class seeing as how that night, we would be commencing our first prank against Gryffindor for the year.


"Ok, so remember to put the bomb in the front pocket of his bag. He never looks in there," Al whispered as he, Scorp, Jo, Rachel, Eva and I all snuck out of Slytherin common room. Dressed in all black, we quickly left the common room, exiting via the Boat Painting, aka, the door. The dungeons were dark and damp, the moisture dripping down my hot neck (I get really hot when I'm sneaking around. Don't ask me why).

After following the map to the main floor, I stopped and looked vigorously on the map for the next corridor to take.

"Quick question! Where is Gryffindor common room?" Jo asked. Of course! If we wanted to prank him, we kind of needed to know where to prank him. No one knows where the other houses' common rooms are – school rule. How will we find Gryffindor's… shoot, did not think of that. Luckily, someone did.

"The Fat Lady painting is the door. The password is 'Flying Cars'. Hugo told me," Al answered, leading the way. I didn't know who Hugo was, so I just nodded and pretended I did.

"Ok, so I did the spell on the Hogwarts map I got for my orientation. It'll glow red if Filch, Mrs Norris or any other teacher is nearby. I don't know if it'll work for students…" I whispered, motioning towards the map in my hands.

Scorp shook his head in disbelief. "How'd you learn how to do that?"

I shrugged. "My friend at the Australian Institute, Max, is a wiz at spells," I answered in a hushed voice.

"Eva is usually our go-to spell girl. But I gotta say, I respect this 'Max'," Jo whispered, awe on her face. I turned around to nod but accidently knocked a painting on the wall. Suddenly, the people in the paintings all started complaining, yelling and whining really loudly. I held a finger up to my lip/ and froze. We all stood there silently, praying they would quiet down. I told you, I was a clutz! After two minutes of all of us not breathing, Scorp nodded and we all breathed out in unison. Eva suddenly burst into a fit of giggles and one by one we joined in. Soon, we were all trying to not laugh, which of course makes you want to laugh even more. A very odd sound escaped Scorp's lips as he attempted to hold in his laughter and that had everyone in silent laughter and gasps. I started shuffling down a corridor at random, needing to move on. I mean, soon we'd get caught and I did not want more detentions!

Oh God.

Detention/ homework thing with Lupin! I didn't go to that! Oh shoot. This is a nightmare! What am I going to do? Professor Lupin probably hates me right now! Oh god. This is all James Potter's fault! I don't care if it's not, it still is!

I huffed quietly as Al took the lead again. We followed silently, sometimes giving each other 'the look'. You know, 'the look'? You don't know what 'the look' is? Well, here's how it goes:

How To Give Your Friends 'The Look'"

Step 1. Laugh/ silent laugh really hard at a joke, noise, sound, thing etc. with a group/ one of your friends when it's totally inappropriate, eg. When it's silent, in class, when you're sneaking around Hogwarts at night and can't be caught because otherwise you could get expelled, at a wedding etc.

Step 2. Stop laughing and compose yourself.

Step 3. Look at your friend(s) with 'the look' that almost makes them almost crack up again and they have to fight to hold it in. If you have a really good 'look', they will crack up for sure!

But the tip is it has to be in the most inappropriate place/ time to laugh out loud!

And that is what and how 'the look' works.

Anyways, back to the interesting part of the story.

After going up moving staircases, saving Scorp from almost falling off a moving staircase, saving Eva from almost banging into a stone wall, moving quietly along endless corridors, having several mini heart attacks when the map flashed red and we all had to hide in odd places, saving Scorp again from almost falling off a moving staircase, walking up more stairs, quietly running down more corridors and looking at hundreds of walls that were several levels tall for the Fat Lady, finally…

"Got it! I found her!" Eva squealed. We all turned to look at her and ran to meet her at the painting. It was kind of… disappointing. I mean, it was a fat lady… in a dress. I thought it would've been more… I don't know… funny. I tilted my head.

"Is anyone else feeling this whole thing was a bit anti-climactic? I mean, the painting isn't even that big," I whispered, with everyone murmuring and nodding in agreement.

"I feel that too," Jo whispered. "So… is this like the Slytherin entrance, where you say the password and it opens and you walk through a hallway with fake lasers and then you walk under a waterfall but you don't get wet… or is it less exciting?"

"I can hear everything you say! Paintings are animated and real! Pah! Kids these days. Wondering the castle at night, trying to break in. Well, too bad! I only open if you say the password!" a shrill voice rang through the room. I realised belatedly it was the Fat Lady. Well, with that grumpy smirk she looks a bit funnier. Of course, I was about three-feet taller than her.

"How does this work, do I just say it or…" Jo whispered uncertainly to Al. He just shrugged and went back to having a whisper conversation with Scorp. I rolled my eyes. Of course.

"How helpful," Rachel muttered to Jo. "Ahem. Ah… Honking Cars! Wait, was that it? I have the worst memory!" Rachel whispered. Al stifled a laugh and stepped forward.

"Flying Cars!" Al said triumphantly and I winced as his voice echoed around us. The Fat Lady painting swung open, with her glaring at us evilly. We all filed in, spilling out into a big, warm and welcoming room in hues of red, orange and gold.

"Well, that was an experience. I mean, I'm so tired. How many times did we almost get caught?" Scorp muttered as he sighed and stretched. Al wacked him on the head.

"Please. You did nothing! You just complained the whole time!" Al whisper-yelled at him. Scorp tried looking innocent but before they could go on, I interrupted them with a look.

"Let's just… get this over with and go back to bed. I mean, I'm so tired," I murmured to which everyone nodded in agreement.

"So… where's James' bag?" Rachel asked. We all look around the common room for a moment, shrugged and Jo sighed.

"This was pointless! We can't even go through with the plan now!" Jo whined. I snorted and walked over to the staircase by the fire. Btw, their common room is much more… antique than ours. Ours is waaaaay cooler.

"The bag would probably be in his dorm. And he's probably asleep and we probably won't wake him up," I offered. Eva looked at me in disbelief.

"That's a lot of 'probably's. Look, maybe we should-" Eva whispered before I cut her off with a wave of my hand.

"Nuh uh! We have to go through with this! It's going to be priceless when I see his face…" I sighed as I walked towards the spiral staircase. I looked behind me a motioned for someone to follow me. Al sighed and quietly stomped up to me.

"Thanks. I was hoping you'd come. Now, if he wakes up, you can make up an excuse at how you had a dream or something," I whispered. Al physically flinched when I said 'dream' to which I found weird. I looked at him, curious to which he just shrugged and shook his head. We walked up the spiral staircase until we saw a thin hallway of doors. We checked each room carefully, looking for James'. Finally, I opened the door to find a sleeping James on the floor. Startled, I jumped back into Al who grunted loudly. We both froze and didn't dare breathe until a few minutes later. I quickly walked around his sleeping figure and looked for a school bag.

"Question: why does he sleep on the floor?" I whispered to Al. In response, he shrugged, said "It's James – who knows what goes through his head," and went back to looking. After a few minutes (which felt like hours) of looking, Al bent down and picked something up.

"No. Freaking. Way!" Al exclaimed quietly as he held a pink piece of paper up. Curious, I walked over to him.

"What is it?"

"A love letter. From Willow Vain! Oh God! James has about a billion girls after him and he loves the attention girls give him, but not Willow's attention! He hates Willow. Her mum, Ramilda, was obsessed with our dad when they were at school. It's just too funny that now her daughter likes James! Oh man!" Al said, chuckling quietly. I snorted and went back to looking. I turned to Al and saw him reading the letter, giving me a view of the back. Messy, scrawled writing was all over it. I quickly snatched it from Al and started reading:

Dear Willow,

I must say that dating in secret has been hard. I honestly don't get why you want our relationship to be hidden. Are you embarrassed or something? Anyway. Thanks for the letter! It was very sweet to open the front pocket of my bag to find a new letter. When are we meeting again? At the usual place and time?

Love you and miss you,

James. P

I practically gasped. The famous James Potter, Gryffindor's bachelor and prized-possession writes love letters to Willow Vain? I would have laughed out loud had James not been sleeping at my feet.

"Read. Now. We have a new mission," I whispered to Al as I handed him the letter. I looked around the room and found an old, worn bag in a heap in the corner of the room. Making sure I didn't wake anyone, I tip-toed around the room. Opening the front pocket of the bag, my suspicions were right. Hundreds of letters were stuffed inside. I giggled, grabbed them all, stuffed the bomb in instead and dragged Al out of the room before I could wake someone.

Once we were down to where the others were, Al shot me a questioning look.

"Best idea!" I whispered to everyone.

And hence began Mission 1: Destroy James' Personal Life


"Ok… look… is he here yet?" Maria whispered to me. I shook my head, disappointed this was taking so long.

Maria and I were perched outside near a tree the next day at lunch, looking for James and his friends. The plan would all go well if only I could bump into him…

Suddenly, I heard the excited whispers and hair flicks coming from all of the girls around us. I nodded to Maria. James must be coming. I straightened up, opened a random book and read. I walked out, keeping still until I saw him walk towards me. I headed straight towards him but kept my head down. After a few moments, I was caught off guard by a loud oof noise. I stumbled back and saw that James was rubbing his stomach. Maria, from behind a tree, did a spell to make his bag fall to the ground and its contents spilled everywhere.

"I… I am so sorry! I just had to get this done and I wasn't looking… here, let me help you," I said to James as I bent down and 'helped' him gather his books. I grabbed some and sat right next to him as I opened the closed front pocket of his bag. The minute I opened it, it completely exploded in a mess of tomato, onions, avocado and chocolate. It was Oscar's Food Bomb, the one we planted last night. The plan was for me to activate it by opening the bag to avoid suspicion on me. His bag was left in tomato-y ruins. I fake gasped, as I looked down to find myself and James covered in tomato. Even though I was prepared for the magical bomb to go off the moment I opened the bag, it still left me shocked.

It was utter silence. Girls whispered as boys finally cracked up laughing and pointing. I put on my best 'apologetic/ confused/ angry/ sad/' expression on and turned to James.

"Thanks for helping me but I'm sorry that- Maddie?" James said my name in shock. His pretty eyes were laced with confusion and his black hair was messy and dishevelled. Specks of tomato covered his face which made him look extremely hot for some reason and he had this cute-

FOCUS MADDIE!

"Uh, yeah?" I answered, saving myself from staring at him too long.

"Didn't know it was you. Oh. Well, sorry you got caught up in this bomb. Just this stupid prank war with Al and his boyfriend," James sighed. I pointed to his shredded bag.

"Anything important in there that got destroyed?" I hinted. I saw his eyes momentarily widen but they instantly returned normal.

"Nope. Well, anyway. Tell Scorp this was a good prank! And that I'm sorry his new lap-dog got caught in the middle," James snickered as he got up and walked off with his friends. My mouth hung open, completely offended. I huffed, stood up but then I smiled when I remembered the plan.

Now, he thinks his 'love-letters' are gone. In reality, me and Al are reading them non-stop and working out a way to get them to cause the most damage. Watch out, James. I ain't no body's lap dog.


"I feel bad doing this. I mean, he's your brother. Are you sure you want to go through with this?" I asked Al uncertainly. He nodded and looked at me weirdly.

"Why wouldn't I want to? This is what James and I do."

"Ok…" I said, still unsure. I got into position and stifled a laugh. This was going to be so funny!

Oh right. You don't know what the plan is! Ha! How funny that you're so confused. Ok, so this is the updated, evil and diabolical plan I have come up with (they don't call me the prank master for nothing)!

Al and I read all of the letters from the start of their relationship till now. It took a while (like, two weeks) but we now know exactly where they meet at what time. So, Al and I are going to expose them! We'll start with handing out some of the love-letters to people but with the names James and Willow blacked out. This will create speculation. Al and I will then spread rumours about who it is, but never mentioning James or Willow. After a couple of weeks of handing out new letters, we'll reveal that it's James and Willow as well as handing out pictures we get of them at their 'secret hide-out'. Of course, those two will be freaking out the whole time, which will be so funny to watch.

I saw a couple of students walking around the corner. I ran out from the corner and smiled brightly at them.

"Hi! I'm Maddie, the exchange student! Me and my friend Al found these embarrassing love letters and we want to know who you think wrote them! Ok, so here you go!" I said in my advertisement voice. I gave the group of kid's copies of the same love-letter which was Day 1, from Willow to James:

Dear _,

I can't bear it. I have held my affections and love close to my heart long enough! I will forever love you and you must know! I write songs and poetry about you, I think and dream about you, I watch you and your friends when you don't think I'm there I know every single thing about you! I'm proud to say that I, _ am completely and head over heels in love with you! To prove it, here's my best poem I wrote about our love:

To wake

To sleep

To watch you wake

To watch you sleep

Is what I dream

Do you dream

Of me

Do I dream of anything but you

No

I can't

Love is like

Time

Forever moving and changing

But also inescapable

My love for you

Is inescapable

Inescapable

To wake

To sleep

For you to watch me wake

For you to watch me sleep

Is what I dream

It's called Inescapable. I will do anything for you. I would die for you, if you wished it. You are the only person that I ever want to love me and the only one that will ever make my heart pound. If you were to reject me, I think I would die of a broken heart. I will always love you and you will always mean something to me. You're the rain to my trees, the wind to my boat, the heart to my blood, the air to my lungs, the water to my drought and the perfect match to my soul. I can see into your soul but the question on my lips is if you want to answer it with your own… what I'm trying to say is kiss me! Kiss me senseless and speechless. Kiss me until the end of time. Hold me with your strong arms and love me with your perfect heart.

God knows how much I love you and want you.

From your girl,

Your only love, _

I saw each girl flinch and cringe at its awkwardness and heard the boys laugh out loud. They all looked at me in disbelief. I merely shrugged and walked away. I could hear the speculation from here.

Al and I went around to all of the different houses (but avoided Gryffindor – we wanted it to be huge before James heard about it) and different rooms. We slid copies of the same letter (which was marked Day 1) under doors, stuffed them into lockers, scrunched into cracks in the wall and flung them around the Slytherin Common Room.

Al and I were in stitches the entire time. We kept on reading the poem out loud. It was just so… cringe.


After we finished handing the letters out everywhere, we slumped on the Slytherin couches, gasping.

Scorp and Eva walked into the room and stopped, looking at the see of Day 1 letters covering the floor.

"What on Earth?" Scorp exclaimed. Eva picked up the letter and burst out laughing not even half-way through. Scorp read Day 1 too. They were both pissing themselves by the end.

"What even? Is this a joke?" Scorp asked, pointing to the letter. We shook our heads and swore them to secrecy when we told them who it was.

The whole of Slytherin was buzzing about Al and I's prank the whole of dinner. I could see everyone passing the thousands of letters around each table, but Gryffindor's. They were looking on in confusion. I smiled smugly. This was going to be fun.

AU: Hey guys! It's me again! Thank for reading! If you have any question or suggestions, let me know! Plus, I have made some small adjustments to the earlier chapters. All minor changes like spelling, descriptions and all that ish, as well as adding those horizontal lines.

Kat xx